11 years ago
Seperate Ways…

11 years ago
Seperate Ways…

Most of the discussion on this blog so far has been about how to create and maintain an ideal mutually beneficial relationship, but it may be worth considering the best ways to, and reasons for, ending an arrangement… because as we all know, nothing lasts forever 😉

ChicBaby writes:

“How do sugar babies decide to end an arrangement, and how do sugar daddies make the same decision? Is it only when schedules begin to clash, or do some people end arrangements simply because they are bored?”

As recommended by many’a sugar dater, I’d think it wise to have some idea about the ultimate duration of an arrangement before it begins. In general, Sugar Daddies and Babies who know exactly what to expect and for how long; have a better taste in their mouths once it’s all said and done.

Do any Sugar Daddies have their own reasons for limiting the length of their arrangements? Do Sugar Babies?

Anyone who’s wondering about the best way to end an arrangement, would probably need to know how to juggle more than one at the same time…

There are indeed some occasions, such as at the gathering this December, in which a Sugar Daddy may want to make an arrangement with more than one Sugar Baby. Or perhaps he already has a sugar baby but would like an additional companion for his trips to the Midwest… for example.

Should he keep his Sugar Babies separated? Would it be appropriate for him to propose an arrangement with both?

To some it all up, this post asks:

How and under what circumstances should an arrangement be ended?

What are some tricks and RULES for juggling more than one arrangement?

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29 Responses to “Seperate Ways…”

  1. Grant Writing Basics says:

    This site covers almost identical stuff… That’s strange…

  2. Сергей says:

    Интересно. Думаю многие будут не согласны..

  3. Janette says:

    Recently my arrangements have ended because they claim to have run out of money. And they need to support their family by cutting corners. Some, I suspect, have ended things because they have found a girl whom is more their type or cheaper. My relationships on this site have never lasted more than six months either because I have broken it off or they have. That’s just they way it goes.

  4. printedpassions says:

    I’ve had more affairs with married men than an actual SD. When I found one, I was willing to treat him like I have with the other men. The money was going to be a bonus. He was enjoyable. However, he indirectly called me a trick. Well, even though the arrangement is controversial, there was no need for that. I didn’t call him a lying and cheating bastard for his actions. We just stopped talking.

  5. loveydoveySB says:

    I have tried out this site, and the one man I met was totally different from how he projects himself. He projected confidence, wisdom, wit, charm, and money. He ended up being cheap, insecure, confused, and a terrible lover. We wanted to have a mentor/protege relationship, but I ended up being the only one to nurture and was mentoring him. I guess I learned a little about myself, but it wasn’t benefiting me. When he admitted he was starting to fall in love with me, we both knew it was time to end it.
    My new SD is much older, but very wise, funny, generous, nurturing, and respectful. He has made me his apprentice and is teaching me how to “earn the big bucks” like him. This has been the single greatest act of generosity I have ever experienced. “Give a man a fish and he eats for a day, teach a man to fish, and he will eat for a lifetime.” I feel like a better person because of him. I care for him very much and we have a strong friendship bond besides any arrangement we have. He decided we will end our arrangement when I find someone “worthy” of marrying and settling down with, but decided we can still work together as friends if we wish. I agreed.
    Also, my take on juggling arrangements…I can’t say I recommend it, but if you do, it has to be all about honesty, responsibility, and avoiding bio-hazards. If you are going to be sexually active, get tested and use protection for any type of “extracurricular activities”. Many men over the age of 35 didn’t have proper sex education in school, and many have never been tested for STD’s at all. These diseases/infections can be silent and have no symptoms. Keep in mind that you might not be the only SB your SD(s) have. Their other SB may not be as responsible as you.
    Also, keeping good emotional boundaries is important. Not only so you don’t get over attached, but make sure you are being giving enough with your affection and attention. An attitude of graciousness and gratitude goes a long way. Your SD needs an emotional haven in you too. That’s my advice. Have fun everyone!

  6. SuthrnExec says:

    I didn’t mean to sound opposed to an allowance, because I’m not – I was speaking about how it would be in “my perfect world” – that is, finding an arrangement where we really connected, had chemistry and I would take care of her – pay her bills, rent, whatever. I’ve been approached a few times by ladies who talk money from the get-go and demand it – usually in amounts that is not reflected in their profile. I get this type of arrangement – maybe that’s all any woman is after who approaches me – but at least make me THINK it’s not all about the money. 🙂

  7. Ms. V says:

    SuthrnExec: I feel you. This SD/SB thing is such a delicate balancing act, though. What to say and when, how, and why.
    I take it you’re not an allowance kind of man, huh?

    one of these days, ladies…one of these days.

  8. SuthrnExec says:

    Mrs. V, to answer your question as to why SDs are willing to pay – I have been searching for someone to fill the void in my life – physical and emotional – but I have not been able to find anyone outside of this site. That may say a lot about the site and/or a lot about me! I don’t mind paying because I don’t mind helping someone out. What totally turns me off is the person that is strictly in it for the money and I suppose they think I am in it strictly for sex. Well, that’s not the case. I would certainly love it if I found a woman that I could connect with and it didn’t require money except on the occasions when she needed some extra – last minute emergency trip, larger than normal bill, repair to car or home, etc.

  9. bostonTerrier says:

    lol 🙂

    keeping everything private is key. both of my sds want to be the *only* sd that i have so … i let them believe that 🙂 i feel kind of bad for lying, but i only lied once which is when i told them i only want one sd and since then they believe they’re the only one i have.

    my logic: i am not in a relationship and i’m not looking for one either so i have some time freed up and after i met two sds i liked i figured … why not have two? i get to go on two very nice dates twice a week and get treated like the princess i am [in my mind that is] from two very nice gentlemen that are becoming close friends.

    with sds i’ve met they always want to be the only one. i guess i could understand why they want to be the only one … but why have less when you can have more?

    it’s pretty easy keeping them separate. i’d never tell one about the other and for about a month i’ve been doing pretty good 🙂

    besides, i am only young once!

  10. Caligirl says:

    LOL….Boston Terrier you are too funny…You know we all need to hear more..please stop teasing us!!!! We can all learn how you balance.
    Remember, Sharing is Caring…(Smile)

  11. bostonTerrier says:

    balancing two sugar daddys … keep everything private.

  12. cre8tor says:

    sincere SD….send an email to Stephan. Your contribution would be priceless. The blog seems to generate quite a bit of frustration from the SB’s. It would very helpful to hear the SD side of things. Maybe then we could work together so both parties are more content. maybe? What do you all think? Mars/Venus on the SD/SB planet? lol

  13. Truly Divine says:

    Chicago SD: Its sounds like we have the extreme opposite concerns– lol.
    I do agree with you though… I believe its about having value in the relationship. It sounds as though your sb doesn’t.

  14. Truly Divine says:

    Typo: My question was–How do men define a genuine Sugar Daddy?

  15. Truly Divine says:

    What I would like to see from a SD is one who nows what he’s about. I have talked to so many guys who say one thing on there profile and when I actually get to talking I realize what he wants and what he says he wants are very different.

    Recently, I met a guy from the site. (I made several mistakes now that I look back). We had a few phone conversations, he appeared very sincere and we lived about 20min from each other. He talked me into meeting at his place. (I’m thinking about all the details as I write and feeling worse).
    There was a definite attraction/connection. We shared many passionate kisses. We both agreed that there was definitely mutual feelings, but when the conversation changed to the financial aspect I noticed the tone suddenly changed. Now he starts telling me he doesn’t like to go out, he would rather stay home and cook steaks if I’m I’m hungry.
    Here is a man who is very attracted to me, has/ claims to have all this wealth. Wants to see me 2-3 times a week and only offer me gas money!! He has a beautiful house, car, boat etc. no wife (passed away years ago), no kids, six digit salary.

    Why would a guy join a site like this if he has no intention of being a True SD?
    How do you men define yourselfs as genuine SD?

    I’m just venting right now, but it just plucks my nerves. Men who don’t want wives/ traditional girlfriend because its to much of a headache. OR they have a wife, but shes not satisfying their needs.
    Its not all about the money, but its about the principle. Could you pay your Wife only gas money?

    I agree with Yael and others– I know what I’m worth and the moment I feel a guy doesn’t value me its time to end it!

    Usually I’m so sweet and positive, but I feel so Sh*ty right now.

  16. Chicago SD says:

    I’m currently thinking of breaking things off with my SB as well. She’s unreliable and her schedule seems to never work out with mine. She can never meet Fri and Sat nights because she rather go out and party with her friends. She can never have dinner with me or spend more than 2 hrs together. SB’s need to get their priorities straight. I understand that SD’s do not own them, and that they have no obligations towards us, and also that everyone deserves to have a life of their own… but SB’s need to take note and realize that us SD’s pay for their rent, their credit card bills, car payments in some case tuition… and we do not deserve to be on the bottom of the priority list.

  17. dreamer says:

    you definatly should sincere! i love to hear things from sd’s that arent trying to hook up with me, then i can hear about what they honeslty feel.

  18. sincere sd says:

    alling out as she accused me of treating her like a sex object (ironic because she was the insatiable one). Gave her an extra month’s allowance at the airport and never saw her again.

    2. Drama / unreliable
    I should have seen this one coming but I was totally in love with my next SB. This woman was high maintenance and emotionally unstable. She canceled or forgot our meeting regularly, called frequently at 1-2am (drunk, fired from her job, argument with family, etc.) I’m not one to watch the allowances and gifts closely but she overstepped her boundaries when she started asking for more and more money between the many canceled meetings. Believe it or not, we broke up by text … probably 100+ messages back and forth over a 3 day period. She accused me of being cheap despite the fact I had contributed over twice what we agreed upon (confirmed the next day through checking my bank and visa statements). I felt really guilty about breaking it off with her as she was unemployed and I struggled with the idea of dropping off 2 months rent to help her get by … rereading her text messages helped me come to grips with not being the fool again.

    3. Change in circumstances
    Having discovered a lot about myself in the last relationships, I went with the exact opposite for my next SB. She was a young exchange student in the country for a limited time, had very modest needs. She needed money for several months as she misjudged her requirements and it would take several months to get money out of her country. She went back to home on vacation and I haven’t heard from her since. I guess she got her money and didn’t need to be a SB anymore. Although there wasn’t a lot of sparks, she was a nice girl who I wanted to help with future financial needs to finish her education over and above our relationship. It still bothers me that she wouldn’t take additional support from me to improve her quality of life here.

    So I’m back on the scene looking for my next SB. I was thinking about writing about my experiences as an SD on this blog to help potential SB understand the other side of the coin. Still undecided but I have some interesting stories to tell.

  19. MSH says:

    My past SD relationship ended at the predetermined time that we had both agreed, which was my graduating from college. If it had ended sooner than that, I would have just accepted that and moved on, but since we both set the ground rules and boundaries from the beginning, I think that it made things better in more ways and maybe worse in very, very few. I mean, when I finished school and was ready for my first real job, I purposely looked for something on the other end of the country because I knew that that would make the break easier for me to just drive away and never look back. yeah, I’m curious as to if he replaced me and what he’s doing now, but I don’t grant myself that luxury of thinking about it too much because it wouldn’t serve much of a purpose.

    I think that any kind of relationship or arrangement takes on a life of its own as much as you will let it. A good friend of mine had an extramarital affair that lasted five years, her husband eventually found out, they went to counseling and then her affair kind of faded out after that. She said that the affair/relationship was kind of like a shark; it had to keep moving forward or it would die. In her case it got to the point where it couldn’t move forward anymore because she was not willing to divorce her husband and leave her two children for the other man. That has always stuck with me.

    So what do y’all think? Is a predetermined length of time, say, we’ll ride this wave until such-and-such happens or comes to end it? Or do you think that the flying-by-the-seat-of-your pants way to go is the best way?

  20. sweetbaby says:

    my past sd relationships have ended when I feel I’m not getting any benefit of the arrangement. Instead of trying to complicate things by discussing with the sd why it feels like he seems to forget my allowance and other issues, i just end it to have a clean break.

  21. dreamer says:

    wow. Thats crazy. Thanks M.E.

  22. Much Experience says:

    “Cars are a great way to estimate the guy’s wealth.”

    Maybe if you’re living the LA lifestyle, then yeah your car better impress.

    But with all due respect, it’s not a very foolproof measure. As I recall, Warren Buffett’s daughter bought him a Golf or something like that, with a vanity plate THRIFTY. Sam Walton (founder of Wal-Mart) said he didn’t need a Rolls to haul his dogs around in, that’s why he drove a truck. A neighbor of mine down the street, much wealthier than I am, and a major SD BTW, drives a laughably modest little economy car. He built a $10MM house just for entertaining..

  23. yael says:

    BT… you’re right to have ended it with him….. it’s hard to deal with jealousy even in a typical relationship let alone in an arrangement …..

  24. yael says:

    oh MS V.- you are speaking my language on that!!!! LOL…. I know what I got and it’s enough to deserve a reward…. I’m not saying “oh pay me daddy” because Id be the same regardless… but I just think that it is obvious to anybody that I’m involved with that I go above and beyond and therefore… they should too……

    I get the impression after reading some of the very good profiles… and not some of the “seeking prostitute” profiles, that many of the handsome stallions are a bit old fashioned and therefore are willing to take care of a woman and her needs… not a rescue situation but still some of the “damsel in distress” idea……

    Also it’s empowering… I can say…. I have been a bit of a sugar mama… (NO not big ballin) LOL… but yes I did take care of the female in my alternative relationship in many ways and it made me feel good… it wsa a good empowerment… I felt happy when she felt happy or felt good when she looked nice cause I had bought her something… I can also only imagine that married SDs may appreciate the spoiling of their SBs because their wives may not be as appreciative or squeal with delight at presents or pampering……. I’m just assuming this… I may be wrong….

  25. bostonTerrier says:

    i decided to end an arrangement because of jealousy … just because i had a sugar daddy didn’t mean i was going to put my love life on hold. i’m a very marriage minded person so i believe i have to be on the hunt at all times outside of my sugar baby relationship. when i started dating my boyfriend things got odd between me and my sd … he was too jealous and i couldn’t deal with it. i wasn’t jealous of his wife after all.

    now that my sds are okay with me being in a relationship it works out better.

  26. Ms. V says:

    ……and I do not think that there are many women bold enough to try something like this, unless they are sure of what they’re “workin’ with”, themselves…
    I got that fire fire 😉

  27. Ms. V says:

    I’d imagine that under “normal” circumstances- a relationship of this sort ends, because of some of the same reasons others do: you get bored, sex is whack, someone else caught your eye, etc…

    Are there any SD’s willing to tell us WHY they’re willing to pay?? I understand the basics, but the super-hott, hung like a stallion, millionnaire probably doesn’t have to offer up cash, so ….why?

  28. lostinwonderland says:

    I’d say that you don’t need to set a time for the arrangement to end. Sometimes things can be great for a while and then go sour suddenly, and you don’t want to have to go back on your word.

    What you can do is make it clear what you want. Each SB is different, right? Some want a one-time arrangement and some may want one that goes on for a year. If you talk to the SD about it, there won’t be any surprises later on.

    Off topic, but I’ve noticed that a good way to find out if a guy is legit is to talk to him on the phone, and catch him off guard and ask what kind of car he’ll be picking you up in. Cars are a great way to estimate the guy’s wealth. A sugardaddy I met up with recently drove me around in his Porsche 911, and he knew every single detail of that car and proceeded to brag about it’s awesomeness, so I knew he wasn’t a fake. Then later I saw his black card. It really is titanium and indesructable, girls. 😉

  29. Pinup says:

    Both of my previous arrangements ended when the lovely wife was suspecting. In a normal case…I think an arrangement has run its course when the agreement has changed….either by time or connection, two main things that hold SD/SB relationships together.Setting a specified amt of time seems boring…..why not allow things to proceed for as long as it feels good for both, be it a week or 10 years?

    As for juggling more than one, I think its perfectly acceptable as long as one thing is fulfilled and that is honesty. If both parties are informed then juggling becomes easy because hiding things are not neccessary.

    At the end of the day, this relation must be fullfulling for both and my only rule is honesty.