10 years ago
Terms of Arrangement: Seeking?


Most seeking a SD/SB arrangement here will find that their honesty, even if a bit brutal, is, more often than not, appreciated. We all have  boundaries, but when it comes to dating in the sugar bowl, there’s usually a little more slack for those who may ‘cross the line’, as long as they acknowledge the boundaries of a sugar once declared.

VillaCypris *276489*

“Given the name of this site, there is a certain “premise” under which everyone is assumed to be operating, whether they are, or not. The men who are seeking only casual sex and women who are seeking to provide that and be compensated for it in financial terms will find each other, just as those of us who are looking for more “shades of grey”, as OC just said, will hopefully find each other!”

There are those who prefer what’s often referred to as a “traditional” SD/SB relationship; where companionship and intimacy are exchanged for spoiling and support, though many if not most arrangements made here are well within the realm of gray mentioned above.

What kind of Sugar Daddy or Sugar Baby are you? Traditional? Post-Modern?

Does your spiritual life flow naturally with your sugar lifestyle?

Have you found any sugar(s) to be more enlightened than those in the conventional dating scene? Are sugars more keen on what it means to “live in the now”?

Leave a Reply

270 Responses to “Terms of Arrangement: Seeking?”

  1. Cartier Diamond says:

    Very good story. Thank you for sharing., However, I don’t see the relevance of this post, although the content is great, but this is mainly a cartier diamond website.

  2. Shay says:

    Hello all I am as well a newbie on this site. I had a question as well!
    After speaking for about a week with a potential Sd I decided to go on a dinner date in an public enviroment. Can you believe this man who Is suppose to be a prestigious professional lawyer aggressively demanded sex from me that day as of meeting!!!! he told me it was not going to work unless we did that night. And he said he would gladly give me 500 dollars???!!!!! we spoke before hand and there were no expectations when we met just geting too know one another too see if we had any chemistry.
    I thought this web-site was not about that and did not cater to prostitutes??? Or just maybe these guys dont have an idea of what a true sugar daddie is???? can somebody help me out here???

  3. Katherine says:

    Hi all :)
    I do have a random question that I thought of when I was reading some of the first posts in this blog. It sounds like creating a second bank account is the safest way to accommodate for a monthly transaction. With all going well, I would hope the sum of this account would be rather pretty. But that means much of it goes to Uncle Sam. Right? And then that means claiming it?? Sticky! How do you work it?

    p.s. whoever went on the Vegas trip: I hope you had an absolute blast 😀

  4. bob says:

    Lisa are you still online

  5. charlie girl says:

    Thanks OCSugarBaby, SuthrnExec & HenriLouis for the feedback! Been busy working…so I haven’t been on here!

  6. docbarbaby says:

    I’m a newbee is there a way to detect the piggy SD’s?

  7. VillaCypris *276489* says:

    Thanks Lisa!!! I appreciate it!

  8. lisa says:

    Sending you some sunshine and warm weather Villa

    Berkshire, I have already walked to and from the laundry and to and from the grocery store. Laundy’s 4 blocks away, grocery about 7 blocks, plus a few piles of contruction dirt to climb as Houston is a nonstop road construction mess.
    Going out again soon (on the bus) down to the mall to meet my parents and daughter. Mall’s 4 blocks away but the freeway is hard to cross and the sidewalks by the mall are gone for more construction.

  9. Be mine says:

    LOL…. I will say that for SB’s like myself who are taking this seriously, it amazes me how there are so many who look at this type of arrangement only for the money. I hope to find that diamond in the rough someone who I can spend many years with. Someone who becomes a very special part of my life.

  10. VillaCypris *276489* says:

    Well…. in Minneapolis we are getting 10 inches of SNOW this afternoon… a BLIZZARD!!!!!!! help!!!!!!!!

  11. BerkshireSD says:

    Lisa, your weather is already beginning to roll in here. Very nice.

    I’m impressed with how quickly you got to and from the laundry. You must be well organized.

  12. lisa says:

    Back from the store. Beautiful summer day in Houston.

  13. BerkshireSD says:

    Few new SDs? Lots of new SBs :) Time for a big inventory liquidation sale 😮

  14. SuthrnExec says:

    Smart move BeMine!

  15. Be mine says:

    Bad BB Yes… I learned a lesson but I guess we all have to learn them sometimes! I’m trying to keep my heard held up high..

    I have also noticed that there are hardly any new SD’s lately :( hopefully we will see some new ones soon.

    So this potential SD IM’d me last night. We did not get into anything deep he just wanted me to know that I’m still #1 on his list. I did not want to talk about his “issue” at home because if it is real it’s a big deal. And needs to be taken care of.

    I’m not totally writing him off just yet. All I know is our connection seemed genuine BUT I will not pass on anyone else till I know its a done deal.

  16. lisa says:

    Hi Back from the laundrette.

    That’s 80 degrees fahrenheit, lol
    Going out to walk to the store soon and then meet my parents this afternoon at the mall. Very busy day running errands.

  17. ~*kittylainy*~ says:

    ok apparantly.. only for a week… still not bad :)…

  18. ~*kittylainy*~ says:

    Dreadful morning meeting today. In this state of economy, there are going to be some massive changes to the way business is structured. This has been the lowerst sales quarter ever. The company is completely revamping image and direction. There are good news and bad. Bad news, we are condencing the organizational structure, there will be massive layoffs in middle management. Good news. I am a middle that is now upper management. And… I am getting a BMW as a company car. no more Domestics! WOOHOO!!

  19. Atalanta says:

    Millionaire Matchmaker makes me so happy. lol
    No matter how cheesy and fake it seems sometimes.

    I can’t even keep up with all the comments nowadays, but it’s great to see more people joining in on the discussion!

    All the sugars sound delicious, so I’m sure you’ll find your match!

  20. VillaCypris *276489* says:

    Good night HotSB!!!!!! *sweet dreams* :)

  21. He'sAHotSB says:


    80 DEG/Fahrenheit right? hehehe

    Australia uses degrees celcius lol

    good night! (morning)


  22. He'sAHotSB says:

    2:40am here in sydney LOL

    BAD BB!!!

    HUGGGSSS (good night for me Lisa!!! LOL)

    sleeping now…lol

    Hi in advance to OCSugarBaby and VillaCypris :)
    my name makers… :) hehehe
    where’s SweetEuropean!!! are we last on her best friends list now…after she met her SD? :( :( :(
    LOL 😛

  23. lisa says:

    Headed out to the laundrette now. Looks like a very warm day here, going to be 80 degrees.

  24. lisa says:

    Good morning everyone. Off today so I slept late, feel great. Checked my inbox, still no message back from the potential that contacted me earlier in the week and still no message back from the one on the blog that wrote me yesterday. BUT, I did get an email from that pervert that asked for closeups of my you know what about a month ago. Eeek! He just said Hello nice pictures, not sure if he remembers that he already contacted me.
    Off to the shower now

  25. Bad BB says:

    Hope it’s workig now….

  26. Bad BB says:

    As for me, I got 2 phone numbers this week provided without any photo, request! 1 reappearing pot and one SD standing out the crowd and having me check my e-mail so often hotmail might start sending me spam! lol And it’s not even the w-e.

    Having a me day today… I should be on and off all day… Have fun in Vegas girls!!! Be good! and if you gotta be bad…. well, then be good at it LOL!!

  27. Bad BB says:

    My post aren’t working 2day… sorry for the piece by piece …. I don’t know whats up…

  28. Bad BB says:

    HesAHottie: LMFAO!!!! I did reply him and told him straight up if he’s waiting for me to go on “sale” he shouldn’t even be window shopping!!! hahaha! And in return he told me :”Let’s chat! and sent me his phone number! This guy sure seems to like the bitch in me…. intriguing yes but it takes one to know one right…..

    AJ: Have fun tonight and remember it’s just like any regular date so nothing is written in stone. If you’re more hungry for shoes than brunch, well just have brunch near a shoe store and suggest wedges for desert! Oh and SD not STD!!!!! ok! :)

  29. Bad BB says:


    As the week-end approaches the sugar bowl keeps getting bigger!! To all the newbies welcome! And I’m happy to say that with this new baby boom I am not longer the fresh meat on campus!! LOL!!

    Be Mine: I understand the fact that you are looking for only 1 sd so am I (1 at a time anyway lol) but in this medium of searching you MUST leave your options open!!! I have a SD that has surely sparked my interest far more the others (frankly the only reason I checked my mail today! tihi) But it will take a lot more than that to make me forget about all other SDs!!! Limiting yourself too soon will not work in your favor if you ask me… until you meet in person, and are sure your SD is 100% keep fishing!! As for the non-response thing, I learned a hard lesson about patience yesterday and my advice to you is try not to go crazy over it and tell yourself that he’s busy with work. If this guy is playing games then drop him like a hot potato!!! And the best way to get over a SD is to…. well we all know the saying!!!

  30. Gail says:

    Yes I am…LOL…it’s only 6:30am…and my flight doesn’t leave till 3:30 ish…ready many hours in advance…do I seem excited this morning…lol…gonna last minute things done…still several hours ahead of me…already dresss, packed, bags in the car:)

  31. SuthrnExec says:

    Nope BadBB – did not see it.

  32. Bad BB says:

    Hmmm I posted a comment… I don’t think it worked….. did anyone see my last comment?

  33. SuthrnExec says:

    Hey Gail – are you getting ready to roll?

  34. Gail says:

    Goooood Moooorning World!!!! (Big Smile)

  35. SuthrnExec says:

    Good morning everyone!

  36. He'sAHotSB says:

    12:55am here in sydney…


  37. He'sAHotSB says:

    hello kitty!


  38. ~*kittylainy*~ says:

    WELCOME NEW BLOGGERS: Janey, PPP1256 and OnTheWater

  39. ~*kittylainy*~ says:

    phew… Delta

  40. ~*kittylainy*~ says:

    Good Morning Everyone.
    Am I the ONLY earlier riser here in Central time? It’s the last day of work before leaving for the hottest sugar party in the history of Sugar!….. It is going to be a LLLOOOOONNNNNGGGG DAY…..
    He’sahotsb: no… no… lol SBs are poledancing and NC should join…

    aww.. wouldn’t it be sweet if there’s actually a little SD group that’s going to join us and it’d be a surprise…. yes..? no…? *sigh* a girl can dream.

    Henri: O… What sad news. So close to home… if my memory doesn’t fail me.. that’s the 3rd one this month. *gasp* Sweeteurodidn’t take a turkish flight… right????….

  41. He'sAHotSB says:

    . .
    O < ……! )

  42. HenriLouis*294522 says:

    Hi everyone,
    This is not the usual exhuberant morning greeting from me.
    The whole nation here is in shock.
    Not far from my home a Turkish airliner crashed into the ground.
    It did not make it to the runway of the airport. Engine failure.
    Nine people dead and 20 with serious injuries.
    For those who fly to Vegas “God speed”.
    Yes, traveling by air is the safest means of transport, yet statistics show
    it can happen anywhere.
    I wish everyone a safe day,

  43. He'sAHotSB says:

    :) hehehehehe

  44. He'sAHotSB says:


  45. Janey says:

    I don’t think there are any sugar daddies left on this site. Maybe it’s because of the tax season. I need some sugar!

  46. lisa says:

    Have a good night everyone. Going to watch some tv now. I’m off tomorrow and have alot of errands to run.

  47. aj says:

    Welcome new sugars :) I have found the blog to be quite helpful…it helps to go back and look at old posts as well…

    Charlie girl – I had the same situation my first or second day with sd wanting me to call him…I did and it was sex,sex, sex for $300/time. That is not my deal…

    Anyway, that was my experience. Who knows? I can’t hurt to try.

  48. lisa says:

    Well I got one that got my email adress and disappeared. Someone form the blog emailed me. His profile is still pending though so I know nothing about him.

    Anyway my bird is trying to flirt with me now, lol. He is so agressive. I let him out a little but had to put him back in his box because he wouldn’t let me use my computer, kept trying to pick me if I tried to use the mouse, jealous I guess, lol

  49. Gail says:

    You will travel again Lisa:) Remember….it’s not the end of the world:)
    and you never know New York may be just around the corner…seems like you have been getting more mail lately:) from what I read on the blog anyway:)

  50. lisa says:

    I would love to go to Vegas. I would love to go anywhere, lol.
    Actually I have been though Vegas when I was about 5 back when my mom and I used to take tours of the Southwest. We would go to California, Nevada, Utah, New Mexico, Arrizona.
    I wanna go to New York now, my daughter had a great time. She got a cute fake gucci bag too. Fake works better in this neighborhood, not a good idea to carry the real thing.

  51. Gail says:

    Hey Lisa:)
    I am going to Vegas…I don’t plan on doing alot of shopping in Vegas…I hope to hit the jackpot….maybe I will be a SugarMomma when I get back:) LOL…..

  52. lisa says:

    I agree aj that one shouldn’t plan a long first meeting. If you are enjoying yourself, it can always flow over to dinner or whatever but if it is akward, well it can be awkward.

    Good evening Gail. Shopping is always a good first date, lol

  53. aj says:

    oppsy…I hope he’s not reading the blog…duh aj?!?

  54. aj says:

    Hmmm… Interesting points… Honestly I would rather shop and chill out during the day since I’m driving 5 hours! I’ll tell him just dinner :) Plus he’s been rather boring in his emails…Thanks Sugars!

  55. Gail says:

    I have had lunch and dinner on a first meeting. It was a blast…lunch on the Wharf…site seeing and shopping in the city…and then a really nice dinner to end the evening. I came home safely:) Just know that if its headed south…go the opposite way:) We are all here if you need us.

  56. OnTheWater says:

    AJ- I would agree…what if he’s horrible? I’d meet for lunch and if things go well you can always end up staying into dinner. If you’re not into him, just tell him you have someplace to be :) Good luck!

  57. aj says:

    Hi Everyone! Haven’t updated on the blog yet…however…first pot. sd date tomorrow evening! Just messaged me if I wanted to do lunch as well..Seems a bit overkill!? Lunch + Dinner?

  58. OnTheWater says:

    Good evening everyone!
    I’ve finally decided to stop lurking and join the fam. I think today’s blogging has been the best I’ve read so far. It’s great to have input from the gentlemen! What does everyone think about posting pictures with distinguishing features removed? I originally had regular pictures but have since switched them out in favor of this method due to my line of work. If you have done this, did it hinder your responses?

    Kitty- NY sounds like a FABULOUS idea 😉

  59. ppp1256 says:

    I have a general question for everybody: when you receive email what is an appropriate time frame for a response? for example if a response is not given right away or atleast for a few days should the other person assume that you are not interested?

  60. He'sAHotSB says:

    I LOVE BREE TOO!!! LOL she’s my favourite!
    although I want to live like Gabrielle…lol

    Bad BB:
    if he said your PRICE TAG scares him…
    I wouldn’t be comfortable with somebody
    that tells me they’re scared of the $$$ “tag”
    I would email him saying what you want to say Bad BB!!!
    “SD, if there is something scary…it’s your face(/pic)” lol

    oh and did you say NC and SDs were pole dancing?

    OH HELLO KITTY :) turn one of your very generous friends “bi”
    and give me their email address LOL 😛

    Be mine 289671:
    I give free hugs the most here :) HUGS!!!

  61. bob says:

    lisa. check your in box on seeking.com I have a question for you. thanks

  62. SuthrnExec says:

    Lisa, I swear, your perseverance will pay off – the sugar gods will certainly be kind to you one day!

  63. lisa says:

    Good afternoon everyone. Just got in from work. A very warm day here today. Near 80 tomorrow. Tired and hungry as usual. I ended up on the bus of “weirdos” today. lol Half the bus was full of some really weird people in which one of them was engaged in a full conversation and she was not on a cellphone, she was talking to herself. Another one kept eyeing me, creepy, glad to be off there, lol

    The 500 a month deal is lame when one wants to get together often. I personally am tired of traditional relationships are they are only temporary too and i’ve grown to love my free time and privacy, but I just need an occasional excitement in my life. If I was going to spend all my free time with someone, I wouldn’t waste it on a sd, I’d find someone to build a lasting relationship with.

    500 dollars a month, shopping,and giftcards is not bad, but this particular guy was not offering shopping or giftcards. I don’t think he was offereing nights out either. I think he was going to use my place as a hotel when he was in town on business. No deal. But that was months ago.

    Now I am still waiting for that potential sd to send my a pic to my email, but 2 days have passed and nothing.

  64. OCSugarBaby says:

    Good Night Henri :)

  65. SuthrnExec says:

    OC, that’s good for me – but it must be scary as hell for you!! LOL

  66. OCSugarBaby says:

    Haaaaha Suthurn, we are of one mind!

  67. HenriLouis*294522 says:

    Hi sugarland,
    I have been up and about from half five in the morning.
    I’ll sign off now and talk to you in the morning.
    It was really a nice bloggers evening.

  68. SuthrnExec says:

    Charlie girl, I don’t think that is unusual but you should call him if that’s possible. A lot more info can be shared more quickly through a phone call than email. On the positive side, it sounds like he would like to make a decision on this and get things settled (about the first meeting) quickly. However, he also may try to persuade you via telephone conversation to do things his way since he may be more convincing over the phone than thru email. With that in mind, DON’T AGREE TO ANYTHING unless you’re totally comfortable with it. Moving too fast is a tactic some use to get you to make hasty decisions – not always, but often it is.

  69. OCSugarBaby says:

    Charlie Girl-He sounds like he is weeding his pot SB’s at warp speed. Ask for his number and do a calling number block on your phone. YOU call him. Not usually a good sign when the SD is in an ASAP mode, but you never know. :)

  70. HenriLouis*294522 says:

    Hi Charlie,
    For communication here there really is not norm, a convention that we all adhere to.
    Some people are audio, that is they like to hear you speak and listen to the timbre of your voice and judge from it if they like you. Some do not have the patience to write long letters. They just want to talk over the phone to get to know you.
    Queston is, do you use your own telephone ? Then he has your private number and might eventually pester you with calls. Buy a pre-paid card for 5 Dollars and use it in your mobile just for these talks. Much safer.
    Perhaps you still have a spare old mobile phone that you could use for this.
    Congratulations on the first sex maniac. Yes, now and then you will come across such a person. In such a situation I would answer: “my mother does not allow me”. Always end it with a nice joke.
    Then you can laugh about it and it does not hinder you any more.
    Good luck with the telephone calls,

  71. charlie girl says:

    Question! The pot SD from out of town doesn’t want to talk through emails…he wants me to call him ASAP? Is that norm? Also I had my 1st…sex, sex & do you like more sex pot SD! Thanks but NO Thanks…ugh

  72. HenriLouis*294522 says:

    As always you are a pleasant surprise.
    Not easy to learn a bit of Dutch.
    It is a hard language and in the begining you cannot make heads or tails of it. The expression double Dutch sprung from it.
    By the way, the greatest Heineken advertising ever.
    Mr Heineken himself always created these slogans
    Another hilarious story, at a certain moment I saw that two Dutch SBs had viewed my profile.
    Hopefully I clicked on the word profile. Both profiles had not been approved due to unsuitable content. Must have been some tourist guides from that district in Amsterdam then, I guess.

  73. ~*kittylainy*~ says:

    lol… Toronto is in Ontario…
    The reason I asked because I was talking to a Pot a while ago who had a 10 y-o that played hockey and we couldn’t meet because his son’s game schedules conflicted with mine
    are we talking in like 3 different coonversations?? lol

  74. Nico says:

    Wow…..sorry…Kitty, he’s from Ontario.

  75. ~*kittylainy*~ says:

    O… I was missing a “~” all day silly me

  76. ~*kittylainy* says:

    haha I hope I made sense there

  77. ~*kittylainy* says:

    dutch bunny: Mijn vorige vriend is Nederlands ik leert een weinig van hem

  78. dutch bunny says:

    Ill be back asap everyone (zo Nederlands als het maar kan Henri!)

  79. ~*kittylainy* says:

    hoe u vandaag bent?

  80. dutch bunny says:

    Kittylainy: LOL! who teachted you that hm? (I already apologize for my bad vocabulary)

  81. HenriLouis*294522 says:

    Kitty Lane,
    Ik hou ook van jou!

  82. ~*kittylainy* says:

    re: age… like suthrn said, don’t worry about it. Many SDs prefer older SBs as they think younger ones are less mature and might have less with common. I have been told by a pot that I looked too much like a young golddigger beside him. *rolls eyes*

  83. HenriLouis*294522 says:

    Hi Bunny,
    Amazing to read the word Dutch.
    Awakes the tiger (William Blake) in me.
    Little lamb (Willam Blake) tell me are you really Dutch ?
    You know Dutch is only used in a kind of shady sense in English.
    Let’s meet it will be a Dutch treat then.
    Yes this is my SD side.
    Send me a message and let’s have a good laugh.
    You might even touch that sixpack that I am working on.
    It is true ! This morning’s warning “bizarre events of extreme importance happen to you”.
    Do I hear some gigling ?

  84. ~*kittylainy* says:

    Bemine: I have had a SD cancel on me 3 times… yup 3-times and the third time, I had it and said politely that I need someone with a little more consistency… and he understood. Then a week later, he IMs me again and wants to meet again. Maybe we just had bad luck~ we’ll see but I will definitely not go out of my way to meet him. I know what you mean re out of town SDs. Sadly I don’t have that kind of flexibility, so if u do, embrace it and use it to your full advantage

    Welcome: dutch Bunny! Ik Houd Van jou!

  85. SuthrnExec says:

    Be Mine and Dutch Bunny – welcome!

    BeMine, I would suggest that you not cut-off communication until you actually meet a SD in person and things are going well. It’s unfortunate that you have to do that, but as you saw, you can never be sure until you do meet face to face. As far as what happened to him, I don’t know that it matters at this point, but I suspect that some pot-SDs think they are ready for this but when it comes down to actually going through with meeting someone, they lose courage, get scared, or whatever – they realize they aren’t ready for it so they disappear. Of course at that point, what can they say? So they just disappear.

    Keep your options open until you are certain you have met your match – you’ll be fine. There are lots of SDs here that find the older SBs very appealing, so don’t despair – they will come around. Good luck!

  86. BerkshireSD says:

    I don’t see anything wrong with your profile. What were the terms of your arrangement with that guy and/or what were the plans for the first meeting?

  87. Be mine 289671 says:

    Thanks Kitty for the words of encouragement.

    I actually prefer someone out of town. Just kind of makes it more exciting you know? I love the idea of flying off to meet my SD and getting away from my life as I know it. Spending a few days pampering and getting pampered isnt that what this is all about? Bringing back that excitement that has gone from our lives?

  88. charlie girl says:

    Thanks kittylainy :)

  89. dutch bunny says:

    Hi all, im also new to the sugarbowl. HenriLouis, your stories always make me laugh (:
    Greetz Dutch bunny

  90. ~*kittylainy* says:

    Bemine: Glad you decided to come out of stealth mode :)
    you are more than welcome to join you just need to a flight there and back. Your concerns are very typical. I think each and every SB and SD has experienced many let downs. The key is to keep moving forward. Keep an optimistic and sunny outlook and you never know, your perfect SD might pop up when you least expect it. Regarding not many in your area. That is OH SO Common. After a couple weeks and you just seem to exhaust the list of pots in your area. But expand your search to states around you, many SDs do a lot of travelling.
    Good luck and don’t give up :)

  91. ~*kittylainy* says:

    NIco: Canadian guy sounds familiar.. is he from Toronto? WHere is Gordan???

    Charlie: Welcome :)

  92. Be mine 289671 says:

    Hi guys… I figured I have been lurking around long enough thought I would join in on the fun. Sure wish I was headed to Vegas!

    I have a question hopefully someone can help a girl out… I met what I thought was an amazing man here. We spent well over three weeks talking and getting to know each other. We had our date to meet all set and then *poof* he was gone. Because of prior experiences I was very leary of him actually showing up. I felt this way even though two days before he was to come he told me he was on his way. Then all of a sudden the night before he was to come into town there was a family emergency.

    I get that there very well could have been this emergency but now he is not contacting me or returning any of my emails. Well, only one email but it has been days. I have come to the conclusion that yes I was scammed but part of me wants to believe that he is true.

    What bums me out is that I totally cut communication with other potential SD’s for him. I am only looking for that one special man who will bring excitement back into my life. And I thought I had found one. Now it seems that there is no one else out there. I have emailed a few that sound interesting but no replies I am a bit older then alot of these SB’s here but I know I still got it!

    What is a girl suppose to do now? I keep looking but it is the same guys that were there last week/month. I have changed my profile a bit can someone take a lookie and tell me what I’m doing wrong?

    I sure could use a hug! And a trip to Vegas. ; )

  93. charlie girl says:

    Worse-case scenarios are always best to keep in mind! My safety ALWAYS comes first! Yes, sending me the money so I can make the purchase, does make sense! And from all I read on here, if he’s a REAL SD, that should be no problem 😉

  94. SuthrnExec says:

    Keep in mind that if he buys the ticket, he can still cancel it halfway through your trip – I know this sounds like worse-case, but you have to consider it. Maybe he would send you the money so you can purchase the ticket – that way only you can alter it.

  95. charlie girl says:

    Thank You SuthrnExec!
    I did find that information on this blog post, “Sugar Daddy Safety“.
    I just sent a message asking him if it would be a problem for him to come to me for our 1st meeting. Though if I did go to him, that I would want a round trip ticket paid for first & that my stay would be in a hotel.

  96. SuthrnExec says:

    There are lots of entries about a SB flying out to meet a pot SD – it boils down to BE CAREFUL. Don’t take any unnecessary risks – and you should really encourage him to come to you for the first meeting, but that’s something you have to be comfortable with.

  97. charlie girl says:

    Wow! Thanks for the warm Welcome!
    I actually did find some of the answers I was looking for!
    I have 2 pot SD I’m talking to at this moment. One lives out of state and would like me to fly out to meet him (not sure about this!)…the other guy is local, married & wants a mistress.
    This blog has been SO helpful, as I have never had a SB/SD relationship before!

  98. Nico says:

    Then I will shoot for that one…I have until then to seal the deal with a SD…have a couple waiting in the wings. One is in Europe and not back in the states until Mid-March and the other married and lives in Canada…waiting on his son’s ‘playoff’ schedule before he schedules his trip.

    Odd the different offers one receives from different SD’s. One is strictly monthly allowance ~ Gordon would’ve been proud of my ability to negotiate that deal and the other gives shopping and loves to drape his lady in Cartier *sigh*

  99. ~*kittylainy* says:

    Nico: no worries there will be another one in April or May :) to NYC…

  100. Nico says:

    LOL @ Gail and Kitty. Unfortunately the event is an all weekend thing….it’s been planned for months and he’s been looking forward to me going for almost a month now. Would be ‘messed-up’ of me to cancel on him now…if it were anyone or anything else I would JUMP in a heartbeat!!!!!!!!!!!

    I join Gail in celebrating our large(r) family!! Welcome all!!

  101. Gail says:

    A big family is a good thing:)

  102. Gail says:

    Welcome all new bloggers…where are you all from? Have you all been lurking:) Poof.!!!..new SDs and SBs lately. The Sugar Family is growing larger. Who is twitching their nose?

  103. SuthrnExec says:

    Welcome charlie girl – if you don’t find a satisfactory answer, just throw it out on the blog under the current topic – we’ll do all we can to help you answer your question.

  104. Bad BB says:

    Welcome Charlie!! And Good Luck!!


  105. charlie girl says:

    OK! I just found the “categorizes” section…off to see if my question can be answered…

  106. charlie girl says:

    How do we find help in the blogs! I’m a NEW SB and have some questions on setting up the 1st meeting…

  107. ~*kittylainy* says:

    NC: you are not a traditional SD so to speak but it works for you and that’s fine. There’s no set rules right, but if a SD wants to see a SB once, twice a week.. $500 is lame

  108. BettieGirlDD*273192 says:

    Awww Nico I would love to hang with you but also understand about friends and house repair. That reminds me… since word of my singledom has gotten around, a pretty hot friend who does electrical work has offered a hand with my ancient wiring. I’m avoiding the temptation to ask him when he’s gonna come have a looksee at my fuse box.

  109. NC Gentleman says:

    Yeah $500 a month was pretty lame of me, but I guess it was more like an affair than an SD/SB arrangement…. as Hotmama said — I am not a true SD :)

  110. ~*kittylainy* says:

    Jump Nico! Jump!

  111. Gail says:

    Nico…jump over the fence…it will be there next weekend!!!! Vegas with all of us will not!!!! It will be a blast!!!

  112. ~*kittylainy* says:

    Nico: if ur even is friday, come sat and if event on sat, come friday :)

    Berk: haha NONE! they are just very generous friends that any SB would be luck to have as SD

  113. Gail says:

    She has enough to make her happy Berkshine:) By the way how is Berkshire’s SB doing today? We haven’t heard from her since her last entry:)

  114. Nico says:

    SSSoooooooooo wish I could be going, and would be too if I hadn’t already obligated myself this weekend. This person has been kind enough to donate the past 3 weekends to helping me better my house…wouldn’t be kewl to back out on the social event pre-planned for this weekend :(

    Tempting though…lol…very very tempting 😉

  115. BerkshireSD says:

    How many real SDs do you have? 😉

  116. ~*kittylainy* says:

    $500 a month does sound very very lame (unless it’s like NCs case when you only get to see them once every 6 weeks…) that is not SD… Real SDs are like SAM and SincereSD who will nonchalantly fork over Ks.. and Ks for sbs just to make them happy :) xoxo :)

  117. ~*kittylainy* says:

    Bad BB:
    Re: Canadian SDs
    I am in Toronto, so I am fairly close to the American border for detroit, Buffalo etc. So I wouldn’t be oppose to contacting them if they contact me. However, I have never actively seeked an international SD. Several has contacted me. But I am quite a busy sugar, I really don’t have the time/want to have to cross the border 4 times a month to see a SD. I am open for a partial SD that frequently travels to Toronto and wants to see me whenever he’s in town.

  118. BettieGirlDD*273192 says:

    and my phone has a great camera. I filmed my Sugarmony with it, remember!

  119. ~*kittylainy* says:

    NC: oo btw… we’re still looking for a sponsor for Friday night dinner. 😉 you won’t get a play-by-play for nothing … and I am SURE you would want pics/videos of out lingerie striper pole party :)

  120. ~*kittylainy* says:

    yup… I’ve got my bberry so NC.. I will give you a play by play update on your e-mail with photos and shoutouts etc. :)

  121. ~*kittylainy* says:

    Good morning everyone!! :)
    I am having some bad luck… I am not feeling 100% and Vegas is FRIDAY.. AHHH!! Any last minute takers btw???
    For anyone that hasn’t been following our little Vegas excursion.
    Y-mine (lol) and I joined forces with the incredible SAM and planned a Sugar trip to VEGAS!
    it was originally just hotel and club now we have got
    – 2 bedroom suite at Encore Wynn
    – VIP table service at XS and Jet (Mirage)
    – Shooting range
    – Exclusive Sushi Dinner
    – Champagne breakfast (courtesy of SincereSD)
    – Private Pole dancing room and Lesson

    WILD!!!!!!!! As long as you can get to Vegas this weekend, you are more than welcome to join :)

    AHHH I am so excited!!!!!
    Gotta Pack Pack PAck

  122. Gail says:

    Kitty:) smile…….

  123. SuthrnExec says:

    OK, which one of you is going to be the Sugar-Vegas Reporter for the blog??

  124. BettieGirlDD*273192 says:

    eeeek I’m so excited, too. I just put some podcasts on my ipod for the trip… am going to do laundry and pre-pack tonight. I’ll be on that plane in less than 48 hrs!

  125. SuthrnExec says:

    Gail, you guys have fun and remember, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas – except for the recap on the Sugar Blog!

  126. Gail says:

    Good Morning All!!!! It’s a busy day for me. Getting ready for the big trip to Sin City:) Meeting all six of my Sugars…its gonna be really SWEET!!!

  127. NC Gentleman says:

    I completely agree with SouthernExec — the more I got to know and trust my SB, the more I wanted to give her. Our arrangement was for $500 a month, but she did well beyond that the longer we were together. If you have something that is working, the SD will give because he wants not because he is obligated to do so.

    Well said Bettie, as usual!

  128. BettieGirlDD*273192 says:

    Thanks SE, I sure do enjoy expressing myself :)

  129. SuthrnExec says:

    Well said, Bettie!

  130. SuthrnExec says:

    BadBB, the fact that you guys had an exchange about that – and there was an exchange, he didn’t NOT respond to your email – is a good thing. Communication is GOOD – I know, we guys don’t get that sometimes. As you get more familiar with SA and all that goes into a relationship, what you’re willing to do changes (how far you want to travel, how often to meet, etc.). I think he’s saying he just don’t want to be treated like an ATM. And I wouldn’t equate a NSA with a cold money driven arrangement.

    I think there is a tendency among some of the men SDs to try to “position” themselves so that they keep the leverage or upper-hand, especially in the beginning of the process. This is a normal business posture that most naturally fall into. I think as you get to know each other, assuming there is chemistry between you, the walls will slowly come down and there will be a gentle settling of the posturing and you will probably find him to be a fairly normal guy who is totally taken by you.

    Good luck!

  131. BettieGirlDD*273192 says:

    Ya know what Bad BB… less than $1k sounds lame compared to some of the others.. but maybe thats an honest $800 vs a bunch of phony or unattainable $2k’s and $4k’s, $10ks… I have a monthly allowance in mind but if someone aproached me at the mall and said “hey let’s go find you some Manolo Blahniks and get to know one another” I wouldn’t say “um no I’m only entertaining offers of four times that.”
    I’m not at all implying you shouldnt hold yourself very high.. just be willing to discuss actually what they’re looking for. And that doesnt just have to apply for money, that can be for distance, age, etc. Finding a middle ground is worth it if you’d enrich each others lives.

  132. Bad BB says:

    Alrighty then!! Votes are in and he gets a second chance!! Updates wil be posted as they come!! And I really think you guys are right about this one… I mean a guy dissing my pics?! wtf was I thinking LOL!!

    Oh plz don’t get me started with these men and their profiles!! As bad as it sounds I never even read the less than 1000 $ haha! I just feel like those guys are on th wrong dating site! There was a fabulous discussion going on about SB’s and them putting a price on their sugar. But what about the SD’s?? I think the price range is smart and helps to go after someone who can offer you the arrangement your looking for. I put a price on my profile and I’m glad I did. I did not go into any details about monthly allowances and gifts but the SD responding to me knows that I’m not looking for a tniy bit of spoiling on the side…. Gabrielle all the way lol! But open for discussion is also a very good attitude to have, this one SD’s profile was just kinda strange. First he stated he wanted to get to know Babies in his neighbourhood, then he said he would be willing to do the pen pal thing and meet “eventually” Then he went on to say how money did not define him as a person and does not want, and I quote: “a cold money driven arrangement” but then finishes it off by saying he wants NSA!!!???

    Can somebody help this guy get a clue?!! I e-mailed him and to him straight up that he should revamp his profile cuz it’s confusing then he replied that he would like to get to know me but my price tag SCARES him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! His pic scared me and you don’t hear me bitchin’… oh wait I guess you do LOL!!

  133. aj says:

    Waiting game, waiting game, waiting game….Uggg!!!!

  134. BettieGirlDD*273192 says:

    I think Gabi and whatshisface aren’t SD/SB because he wants kids and she’s resisting. Or at least that was the situation when I stopped watching around season 2 or 3. So I’d say she was a trophy wife maybe.
    i dont know who I’d want to be, prob Lynette cause even though she’s exhausted she has her career. My fave’s Bree cause she’s so beautiful and craaaaa-zy!

  135. NC Gentleman says:

    Good morning all. I gave my first SB $500 a month plus some spoiling — shopping and gift cards, but I only saw her about once every six weeks. You can’t focus on just the dollar amount, but it is the overall deal. We were both happy with the arrangement. However, I do agree that 8 nights a month for that amount of money is ridiculous, and as Lisa suggested maybe one night a month which would be closer to the arrangement I had.

  136. SuthrnExec says:

    Good morning everyone! Cloudy and rainy here but I’ll be so busy I prob won’t notice too much anyway!

    BadBB, unless he has given you reason to doubt what he says, give him the benefit of the doubt. There are times when travel, meetings, client dinners, etc. are so jammed for a couple of days that there is no chance to respond to email – or when there is time, you’re not in the right frame of mind.

    Feel free to freak out here in the blogger-hood. We all understand the excitement and anticipation. You’ll soon learn to control your expectations and then when the right one comes along, you’ll be blown away. That’s exactly what happened to me!

  137. Mina says:

    Good morning. I have to say Bad BB’s bit about “probably used my photos for some wrist strengthening exercises” made me laugh!

    What kind of sugar daddy or sugar baby are you? Traditional? Post-Modern?
    I do believe I’m a mix of the two, leaning a bit more towards the traditional. I feel I fit the role of “stereotypical” SB given my age, looks and such.

    Does your spiritual life flow naturally with your sugar lifestyle?
    I’m not an entirely spiritual person, but I believe in karma to an extent.

    Have you found any sugar(s) to be more enlightened than those in the conventional dating scene? Are sugars more keen on what it means to “live in the now”?
    I wouldn’t use the term “enlightened” but my SDs are all very well educated, well traveled, well read and it certainly shows. However I don’t think it has anything to do with them being SDs, as someone in the conventional dating scene could very well have the same background and pedigree.

  138. Nico says:

    Mornin’ HotSB ~ I must admit, I’m not much of a shopper. I typically go, buy and leave. I don’t have the funds for shopping and my closest friends are mostly guys so, not many girl friends to help me. I’ll go to BCBG outlet (fav) and tell them how much I wanna spend and they’ll put things together for me….that’s the best way for me.

    I guess, of the four to choose from, #4 was the only one I still hadn’t done and wanted to experience so, there’s not much glam in that LOL. I would like a nice SD to do that for me. I take of everything BUT the spoiling….:)

  139. He'sAHotSB says:


    so that means…a SD profile with “open $” is scarier than “$3000-5000” !


    im scared now…lol…because spoiling can be one large starbucks to some SDs…and spoiling can be a car! interesting…hehehe

  140. He'sAHotSB says:

    Hugs Nico!!! :)

    i love number 4 hehehe

  141. lisa says:

    one guy who contacted me thought “spoiling” was paying for dinner,lol
    Another one wanted to spoil with “affection” lol
    I think I will pay my rent with “affection” next month lol

    1000 monthly would be ok for me providing the sd didn’t expect all my free time. I live quite cheaply but need to have some money to save for security as I live check to check and I would like to be able to shop too.

    Gotta go to work now, be back late this afternoon

  142. He'sAHotSB says:

    YES!!! Lisa!!!

    hahahahaha or the profiles that say…”I love to spoil” but

    $1000 monthly

    WHAT? spoil? how??? lol

  143. Nico says:

    1. Susan? (single, a daughter)
    2. Lynette? (housewife, 4 children)
    3. Bree (housewife, a son, a daughter)
    4. Gabrielle (shopping lol)

    I too would choose Gabrielle’s life but mostly because I’ve done 1-3 (more or less). I’ve been married and have 3 children ~ grown. Now it’s time for me. As a young mom I am still young and ready for #4 :)

  144. lisa says:

    I love those profiles where they are looking for someone who isn’t materistic, lol and someone who isn’t after money yet they post pictures of their fancy car or home, lol
    I have found alot of the guys one here are using this site for a nsa relationship and really have no concept or financial resourses to be a sd.

  145. lisa says:

    Good morning everyone. Getting ready to go to work and then I’m off tomorrow and friday.
    I would choose Gabrielle’s life as I love to shop.

    The guy I mentioned was from a long time back when I was still getting responses. Now I get a sporatic message and then the guy disappears. The ones I like the best are those who contact me, disappear, contact me again a month later, disappear or those that want to meet when they come to my city but have no interest in communicating and getting to know each other in the mean time, they just pop up when they’re in town and I come home from work and find an email that they want to meet right now. I am not interested in dropping everything and just going out an meeting a stranger when I come home from work. It just doesn’t work for me to be to contacted by someone and then they disappear and months later they turn up wanting to meet just like that.

    Have a great day everyone. It’s going to be a warm day in Texas.

  146. aj says:

    Hot SB – Lol! Nothing surprises me anymore…hahaha

  147. He'sAHotSB says:

    LOL! Yes AJ! :)
    I would love to live Gabrielle’s life a lot too!!! It would be very fulfilling! lol

    I was thinking…after reading one SD’s profile…

    the SD said…he doesn’t like SBs into material things “look elsewhere”
    but…he likes to spoil…


  148. aj says:

    Oh and one more thing…the book The Four Agreements (great book btw) has two chapters that I remind myself of daily.

    1. Don’t take anything personal.
    2. Don’t make assumptions.

    These are tough sometimes, but life is much easier when you realize the truth to these two thoughts.

    Good Luck!

  149. aj says:

    BadBB – I would give him a chance! A lot of SD have very busy work lives and that is why they choose this type of arrangement. Nonetheless I know just how you feel…I’ve been waiting for my two pot. sd’s to email me back the last 2 days (supposed to have dates w/ them on thurs. and fri.). Climbing the walls, checking my inbox like a maniac :) BUT I’ve refrained from emailing either one again because I just don’t see the upside… Don’t let them see you sweat, be sweet yet slightly indifferent at first. Now of course you can freak out to your sugar family, lol, because we all know how it feels…that’s the beauty of this blog. It has some really amazing people and an excellent support system. That being said…I’m going to email him this afternoon if I don’t hear from him to confirm our dinner plans for Friday because I am traveling. Two days of leaving him be is enough – LOL. The reality is every SD and SB are different and who knows what the “right way to handle it is…live and learn i guess :)

    Hot SB – Can I be Gabrielle but keep my son? Lol …

  150. He'sAHotSB says:

    1. I don’t want to marry a woman and have children! lol
    2. I can’t have children! (man+man= lol)

    “Well…if you had children… (Gab: Here we go!)
    I’m just saying that children give your life a purpose…you get so busy taking care of them that you don’t have any time to wonder if you’re happy.”

    Gabrielle said…”I LOVE MY LIFE A LOT-IT’S VERY FULFULLING” to her mother in law…

  151. He'sAHotSB says:

    I was very curious…ladies! :) It’s time for a vote!!! lol
    out of the 4 housewives from Desperate Housewives…

    who’s life would you choose to live?

    1. Susan? (single, a daughter)
    2. Lynette? (housewife, 4 children)
    3. Bree (housewife, a son, a daughter)
    4. Gabrielle (shopping lol)

    Gabrielle’s husband said:
    “She…is unhappy! I’ve given her everything she ever wanted…but it doesn’t seem to make a difference…I feel we’re drifting further and further away……”

    Gabrielle’s mother in law said:
    “So you shop a lot ha?… (Gab: Yea so?)
    most women that shop a lot is because they don’t have anything better to do! (Gab: What’s your point?!)
    Well…if you had children… (Gab: Here we go!)
    I’m just saying that children give your life a purpose…you get so busy taking care of them that you don’t have any time to wonder if you’re happy.”

    Do you think…Gabrielle and her husband…live a SD/SB life…?

    just curious! :) hehehe

  152. aj says:

    Gmorning Sugars! At work, been up since 3:30! Have some interesting stuff going on and observations to share…will do that as soon as I get organized and situated here.

  153. HenriLouis*294522 says:

    Hi BB,
    Question is, do you like him ?
    Past week has also been hectic for me.
    I am busy from early in the morning till late at night.
    Also I have not been in a position to be here every day.
    I just get on twice or three times to read.
    So I am also lagging behind.
    Not out of disinterest, but pressure of work.
    Question is do you like him ?
    Than it is worth continuing.
    It is a good sign that you have been all worked up.
    It means you are seriously interested in him.
    Just keep on going.
    Sympathetic hugs,

  154. He'sAHotSB says:

    LOL Bad BB!!! :)

    give him a chance hehehehehe :) I would!

    and Lisa,

    $500 monthly? that is not an “offer” at all!
    $500 monthly for 2 nights x 4 weeks = 8 nights???
    he’s not an El Cheapo Bad BB…
    he should use that money to see a psychologist…


  155. Bad BB says:

    Lisa!! 500$ a month is a boyfriend not a SD!!!! Regardless to your financial situation, unless you still live with your parents and have NO expenses 500$ really won’t do much if you ask me. And he want’s to room with you! Pathetic!! All I have to say to that is RUN!! Run like the wind and leave El Cheapo in the dust! I don’t wanna sound like a bitch (but I just am lol) but this guy is asking for far more than he’s willing to give and that’s the total opposite of a SD!

    HotSB: LOL!!!

    Have a fab day everyone!!!

  156. Bad BB says:

    Good Morning Sugar Sunshine!! Have a silly but positive story to tell… This SD that initiated contacted with me last week, exchanged e-mails, decent convo, then suddenly went a-wall the minute I sent him my pic (he provided me with his first… goofy looking but tall… a little harry tho… wtv) Being new to the site this was my first experience like this and my first reaction was he didn’t like my pic!! which was strange to me because I have a pic attached to my profile and although the face is blurry… well we get the point. I actually sent him a few “better” pics of myself in some strange attempt so show face and still no reply! Needless to say I was upset at this guy for wasting my time and I decided that he probably used my photos for some wrist strengthening exercises! Now this morning I get a very unexpected message apologizing for the delay and blaming it on work… And get this: he said he never even got around to checking those e-mails I sent!!! The type of work he does will definitely warrant a benefit of the doubt pass but I still find myself so petty for freaking out in the first place! LOL!! What do you guys think? Should I believe this guy and give him another chance at my sugar??

    … one things 4 sure I lent a very valuable lesson about patience this morning lol

  157. He'sAHotSB says:



    lol :(

  158. HenriLouis*294522 says:

    Good morning sugarland,
    It is five in the morning and I will be out again for geese.
    Although it is still dark birds are sining their song.
    Yes it was fast and furious Suthern you are right. Amazing stories.
    It is going to be an exciting day for me.
    There is this lady who can read your future sending me mail regularly to warn me of doom ! Well I am expected to pay of course to read why etc.
    The warning now reads:
    “bizarre events ofextreme importance are to happen.
    “the unexpected is about to happen very soon.
    It can only mean that my pot SB is just around the corner.
    Any moment now !
    I’ll be on red alert every minute of the day.
    There is always hope.
    Again a hilarious start of the day.
    See you later.

  159. He'sAHotSB says:


    and beep!


  160. SuthrnExec says:

    Good evening Sugar People! I’m just finishing up on some work this evening and thought I would wish everyone a pleasant evening. For those who were not able to follow the blog throughout the day, it was fast and furious there for a while. Some interesting discussions were had…

  161. lisa says:

    not to mention nonstop fire engine sirens (I live across from a fire station)

  162. lisa says:

    Even though I have an apartment, I prefer that any sd not spend the night here. I want my time with a sd to be an escape from the day to day and I wouldn’t sleep a minute worrying about whether his car would be stolen in the parking lot of my apartments. I also have family and friends calling and coming by and do not want them to cross paths.
    Plus the loud blarring music and crying kids outside the window don’t make for a very intimate evening.

  163. bostonTerrier says:

    i’ve received messages from a few guys who wanted to meet me in my on-campus residence. i was so shocked by them … they were clearly on the wrong site.

  164. lisa says:

    Also gotta love the one that wrote me once awhile back. We discussed an arrangement. He offered 500 a month allowance so I’m thinking ok, he’ll come in town once a month and we get together. NO, he planned on coming every week and spending 2 days and nights at my place. I need my privacy and my own life, can’t exactly have family and friends over on my days off if I have some guy hanging around the whole time. No mention of going out and doing stuff, just coming to my place. This guy listed his income as 300K and net worth over a million but only willing to part with 500 a month in exhange for all my free time. Anyway that guy is still on the site months later

  165. lisa says:

    I will trade you my warm Texas weather for a better selection of Sds. Half my responses (which comes out to maybe in the past couple months) are from Canada. Only thing is that they want to come down on the weekend and I work every weekend. Half the sds in my city are non paying members who never pay to join. They sign up, look at pictures, and fade away.

  166. Bad BB says:

    Hi Lisa! I’m sorry to hear your getting spammed by some creep! Most replies I get from SD’s include there e-mail but I’ve never used one yet… They usually want pics and my NEW rule is no pic without a number… kinda prove to me your serious thing… I’m still struggling to keep control and still give enough to keep them interested… exhausting ….

  167. Bad BB says:

    Woo! Just finished reading all of today’s blog! Best 45 mins i’ve ever spent online! lol
    I have a question for lovely Kitty! : Fellow Canadian here! and Yess the weather does suck! But what do you think about the Canadian SD’s? I don’t know why but I find the Over seas SDs more appealing… I don’t know if I should stick close to home or be more ambitious… thoughts?

  168. lisa says:

    I use a generic email for the sb thing. It’s odd that I am getting spammed so much the last few hours and no email or pictures from the sd I gave the address to.

  169. aj says:

    Lisa – I know what you mean. I created a different email account for my SB life. At least for now.

  170. lisa says:

    Good evening everyone. Home from work and meeting my daughter.
    Tired and hungry now.
    I gave that potential sd my email yesterday so he could send me a picture. Well he read my email but has not wrote back but oddly I seem to be getting alot of weird spam in my mailbox and this particular email address isnt’ given out much. I think I will communicate strickly through the site from now on till after I meet someone, not giving out my email anymore.

  171. Bad BB says:

    Very interesting topic today! I’m still working my way through the Sugar ladder and although initially all I wanted was a good time, I sometimes feel the right SD could definitely leave me wanting more… The strange thing about this site to me is how suddenly someone has flipped the script… I am usually the one being pursued and chased by men and I feel these men have so many SB’s throwing themselves at them that they finally find themselves with the upper hand!

    But where do we draw the line I ask? I’m a certified freak in the sheets and OF COURSE I want to have (good) sex with my SD (and plenty of it!!) and if the sexual chemistry isn’t there I can’t see myself sticking around very long… But then you have some guys claiming to be looking for their future wife on this site and I find that very hard to swallow! Sure you can find love any where but the men posting that up are to me very unappealing and also very weak. They are either desperate, trying to say what they think woman want to hear, or both!!

    I’m not going to lie though, I have had my fairly large ego bruised more than once on SA and some men left me wondering what the hell I did wrong… but the fact remains that in any type of online dating lying and misleading are just to easy and many people are insincere with there expectations and there wishes… Hiding behind a screen is some people’s opportunity to be something they aren’t really but always wanted to be! It’s a lot easier to read a person face to face and I sometimes doubt my own good judgment…

    With that said, I seek to play the role of a traditional SB with no strings attached and that’s that! Of course we all know sex tends to have a sneaky way of changing things but as long as the respect is mutual the relationship should work. right?

    I am not in a position to fully answer some of these questions as I am still on my Sugar quest but I do appreciate this blog very much and today’s post really gave me something to think about!


  172. SuthrnExec says:

    Hey Hgirl – I think that’s reasonable.

  173. Hgirl says:

    One of the reasons that I did not put an amount on my profile is because I can see my arrangement working out in very different ways. Thus, it’s hard to limit myself to a simple range.

  174. OCSugarBaby says:

    Good Nite Henri :)

  175. HenriLouis*294522 says:

    You are an admirable diplomat !!!

  176. HenriLouis*294522 says:

    Well Kitty,
    Be my guest, walk with me in May.
    It is a great experince to set out on that pilgrimage.
    Lots of people use their holidays to walk 2 or three weeks.
    Then after a few years they have completed the 600 miles in that way.
    To begin with I will work as a volunteer in a refugio (pilgrim’s hostel)
    fo two weeks in a litle town in France on the foot of the Pyrenees mountains. Beautiful name St. Jean Pied de Port.
    Here is the only mountain pass that pilgrims could take to walk across the mountain range throughout the centuries and arrive in Spain in the cloister of Roncevalles.
    I am very good at cleaning dirty toilets and shower rooms and make beds and cook and do the dishes. It is all part of the game to help pilgrims on their way. So if ever you need a house-boy just give me a ring.
    Have to sign off now. Tomorrow again an early day, get up at five.
    I stood at the scales in that gym and I believe I lost more that 2 kilos in one week. But I wil have it officially measured by one of the instructors.
    I could even qualify for a medal, if I reach my goal to lose 6 kilos in three weeks. It made me laugh loudly, so many medals to pin on my blazer.
    See you tomorrow,

  177. OCSugarBaby says:

    Berk-I feel very uncomfortable placing an SB’s profile out on the blog with out their consent. It is different when we ask for others to disect it. But these women are disected by all who read the blog. Not here to defend their words or pictures. Just my two cents.

  178. ~*kittylainy*~ says:

    I teared up read that book, have never felt so touched by one’s writing. I would love to visit one day~

  179. HenriLouis*294522 says:

    I believe I have read and have all his novels here.
    A farewell to arms is so touching.
    When walked the Camino de Santiago I arrived at the gates of Pamplona on the third day. I stopped walking for two days just to get the feeling of the town that figures in his novels.
    In almost every shop there is a reference to him.
    I will be there on the Camino in May again and send you a picture postcard of Pamplona.

  180. ~*kittylainy*~ says:

    Henri: Hemingway is my favorite author.. I am not much a reader but I love Hemingway. “A Farewell to Arms” is my ultimate favorite book.

    NC: I know ur smart 😉

  181. NC Gentleman says:

    that wasn’t a promise but a threat perhaps — but I caught the irony Kitty :)

  182. BerkshireSD says:

    Guys, what do you do with these? Kid in the picture. About Me: “well endowed and experienced.” Seeking: “a friendship…”

    Does this one get passed up most of the time even by those she would like to target? Does this sort of profile drive you nuts trying to figure out what is going on or do you just skip it?

  183. HenriLouis*294522 says:

    Of course anyone will become dependant on the extra amount you receive every month.
    Before the internet bubble I really spent without a flinch. Every month my assets rose so quickly. Then the plug was pulled and lots of money down the drain. Yes, a nice lesson for me. So I returned to normal proportions in my spending habits.
    I was amazed at myself, I did not mind returning at all.
    I had a great time though. I still have, reading my diary of those days.
    Especially wow was that powerboat in the Bahamas, me acting like Earnest Hemingway going out for really big fish. Lovely photos.

  184. ~*kittylainy*~ says:

    Bettie:.. if u give me 10k a month.. i will spend 9k a month. But I can use the money to hire a financial planner…. hmmm

    NC: false promises… turn offs LOL

  185. BettieGirlDD*273192 says:

    Kitty I was presuming we were talking about if it wasnt too good to be true. Then yes thats so right on about the dependence.. Were it me, I’d get just a little more comfortable and put the rest towards my student loans.. which after a few months would be gone, at that rate! Then were the relationship to end I wouldnt feel the difference day-to-day.
    But for you that does make sense now you say it that way.

  186. NC Gentleman says:

    Thanks OC :)

    and I have to make a trip to Toronto – Taoist are so damn cool right?? :)

  187. ~*kittylainy*~ says:

    Berk: I know… I know…

  188. BerkshireSD says:

    Watching out for too good to be true deserves an entire article unto itself.

  189. OCSugarBaby says:

    NC-Your advice is worth far more than two cents… :)

  190. ~*kittylainy*~ says:

    Bettie: I am cynical or jaded I guess…. but I feel as if it is too good to be true. And if I accept.. slowly I can see myself becoming dependant on that 10K a month/ (god that’s a lot of money) and i hate dependance!!! (you know that lol)

  191. BettieGirlDD*273192 says:

    Kitty, why’s that? If he sees you’re special he might be special to you, too. And if the ammt it more than you want, you could use it to start a charitable foundation.

  192. ~*kittylainy*~ says:

    BerkshireSD: That’s kind of where I am going with it… but digressed lol

    NC: hello my taoist friend :) come to Toronto!

  193. ~*kittylainy*~ says:

    Let me add that, if I recieved an e-mail that read,
    “Hello Kitty, you are gorgeous. I really love the part that you wrote about your passion for world affairs and changing the world. That is very admirable. I want to get to know you and possibly arrange an agreement of 10K a month for you.”

    I would express my gratitude and decline

  194. BerkshireSD says:

    The girl asking for what she wants is a different type of girl than the one asking for what she needs. Each type needs a different type of SD.

  195. NC Gentleman says:

    Ok — just my two cents — I almost exclusively searched for SBs with amount negotiable…. just a personal preference I guess… But I only want to see an SB about once a month on travel, so it almost has to be negotiable, but just my opinion :)

  196. ~*kittylainy*~ says:

    I am freezing… damn Canadian winter.. I cannot stop shivering!
    Now that the weather info is over.
    I would like to chime in on Berkshire’s discussion regarding what SDs want.
    It is brutly obvious that every SD wants and is looking for different things, therefore are attracted to different profiles. so the best advice would be to be sincere and express what you personally am and what you want. There’s no point in warping the truth so you might appeal more to the general SD public. Not only will these lies will soon emerge itself, but you will recieve e-mails from SDs that doesn’t suit your taste, so why waste your time.
    Regarding the amount. I really like how you expressed a difference between amount you are worth and the amount you need. I know I am WORTH more than 3-5 K a month (let’s hope we all are!) but I do not NEED any more than that. I am a simple girl that loves shopping for dresses and shoes. I have an above paying job, but I would just like the extra spoiling to get those Louboutine. I cannot imagine recieving anything more than that from someone. It would be very nice, but then It’d be squandered and it might lead me to bad decisions like quit my job. My job is at it’s growing stages for my life career, and I would hate to lose the opporunity I am given.

    But that’s just me.

  197. Nico says:

    Funny….I just found this, cut and pasted from a certified member’s profile :)

    “The amount of time spent together is flexible – as often or as little as we both desire in a given month without any predetermined expectations. People are not a commodity and I don’t believe in treating them as such, regardless of the financial arrangements.”

  198. BettieGirlDD*273192 says:

    Suthern and Berk maybe this gal is willing to wait for the SD who finds her worth it… If i were a SD Id find her boring but who knows maybe theres one somewhere to who she resembles his biggest childhood crush, or maybe she’s WR Hearst’s great niece and is just keeping that close to her chest…
    Or maybe she’ll lower her standards… or maybe she expects you to counteroffer, or she may do like Noka chocolate and raise them to luxury status!
    So many variables in finding that right match. Somewhere in an antique store there’s a Duncan Phyfe dining set just waiting for me to be in the position to come find it. I’m sure the store’s owner is counting on it. When the right time comes I dont expect to talk him down too much.

  199. BerkshireSD says:

    Another thing from an SD. Someone mentioned detailing what the SB wants/offers. I can’t tell you how many SBs I approached assuming what they said was not what they meant. Why? I found a good percentage either didn’t want what they wrote or would entertain vastly different things from what they talked about. Some never even thought about the concept of what I was offering. Some SBs got pissed and said ‘you didn’t read my profile,’ but far more said hey that’s interesting…let’s talk more…

  200. HenriLouis*294522 says:

    Ten K a month is amazing.
    Over a year it would be 120.000 Dollars
    I suppose she also expects that holiday allowance, is another 10 grand.
    Then top it off with a bonus for “work well done”.
    Here we are looking at a cool 200.000 Dollars a year.
    It is more than enough to buy Sweet Euro that pink Bentley Coupe’ she has set her heart on.
    Well let me tell you that to me, nothing compares to Sweet Euro.
    Any girl putting such an amount in her profile could never defend why this is the correct amount representing her.
    There are even girls setting their price at 20.000 Dollars a month.
    It is a lightgreen Bentley Coupe’ for myself and that pink Bentley Coupe’ for Sweet Euro and a Jaguar R type for our cook.
    These amounts are all pie in the sky.
    Just give me that SB who has “amount negotiable” in her profile.
    Then I have the chance to be really generous and surprise her with an allowance above what she had ever dreamt of.
    To her it would really be spoiling.
    The 20 K plus girl is so blase’, you could never surprise or spoil her with anything. It would never be enough.
    I always smile when I see this.
    Life is like a comic strip.

  201. SuthrnExec says:

    Of course there are limits, but if the profile doesn’t layout a description that is aligned with what I am looking for, it doesn’t matter what the monetary details are – I don’t get to that part in the profile.

    And there are parameters, of course, with the biggest being chemistry and an intuitive “feel” for the individual and their personality.

  202. BerkshireSD says:

    OC, yeah, some of these thoughts can be for 1 or two steps further down the communication path. It should be possible to create a first impression in the profile that does not cause any surprise when the details come out.

  203. Nico says:

    good afternoon sugar family ~ SE, NC, aj and Bershire …to name a few.

    As to Bershire’s point, I personally have not stated an ‘amount’, not because I do not fancy myself a commodity but more because I do not like to limit options.

    Once upon a time (LOL) my father once told me, when completely an application, not to put an amount in the salary desired field but instead to write “open” so as not to ‘underbid’ (for lack of a better word).

    I am open to all types of arrangements and leave much open for discussion, discretion and to be worked out as time progresses.

  204. SuthrnExec says:

    Berkshire, I can’t reveal any more of my secrets for nuttin’!

  205. Nopointwhatsoever says:

    AMEN!!!! AMEN!!!AMEN!!!

  206. OCSugarBaby says:

    oops I meant that SB’s can support themselves…

  207. OCSugarBaby says:

    I made no mention of my availability or financial requests in my profile. I did mention that I wanted a true gentleman who knows how to be a benefactor. I was not vague on purpose; I just was getting into this and had not found my footing so to speak.
    I agree, if your availability is xyz spell it out, but don’t make it so inflexible that you stop SD’s from reading further. I am on the fence about listing an amount for allowance. Maybe leaving it open and state a range in the below area for clarification.
    In earlier posts I have mentioned that I will NEVER bring up financials. I expect an SD to understand what it means to spoil. I can support myself as most of the SD’s on here can also do the same. When you find chemistry with the right SD they the comfort level will grow and the spoiling evolves. Hard to describe, but a whisper speaks volumes compared to yelling at the top of your lungs allowance, allowance allowance. The shades of gray are become more defined with each person’s experiences. No two SD/SB relationship will ever be the same! How can it be? We all have such different lives and circumstances.
    We can give advice on approach but not on what makes one SD or SB more appealing over another. That is why Baskin Robbins has over 31 flavors…

  208. BerkshireSD says:


    5-10K is not a number. Its a national forest.

    How much do you need or want? Is your amount based on need or what you think you are worth? Why do you need that much? Why are you worth that much.

    When BerkSB and I first were talking I asked her what she needed to make what I wanted possible for her to provided. She went off a couple days and thought it through and then gave me a number. She told me where the number came from.

    Her number was reasonable and comfortable for me. I had no hesitation saying I could handle that. It was also below her range. It turned out what she really needed was affordable and the situation I was offering had so many attractive non-monetary facets to it that we were both more than happy.

  209. BerkshireSD says:

    Listen up ladies: Guys tend to be literal. Make sure the literal meaning of your essay is consistent and accurate.

    Sthrn surely there are some parameters and limits financially for you as well. SDs who would want this arrangement, what is reasonable $$$?

    How would you approach a financial arrangement with someone like this? What assumptions are you making about the process of getting to know the person based on her description of her availability?

  210. aj says:

    Ha Ha! A Sugar Seminar…Lol!

  211. SuthrnExec says:

    Did I walk into a seminar or something?! lol

    I take the words written in a profile to mean what they say – I don’t always “read between the lines” very well. That’s the nature of my personality and formal training. I’m looking for facts. For someone who does not express them self well via text, it may mean that I am not understanding everything she is trying to say and will pass them by. But I think most guys are pretty literal – so that’s lesson #1.

    Secondly, I would say that if there is an area of flexibility, the profile should make that clear as well. Guys probably assume that if, unless it is stated, there’s not much flexibility. Occasionally we will ask about being flexible about on a certain point, but we usually pick the wrong point and are rebuffed!

    I haven’t looked at the profile in question – only your excerpt. The amount of money aside, the kind of relationship she appears to be seeking would not interest me. I hate to use language like “pricing herself in the market” and “over priced” because #1) it sounds like we’re turning her into merchandise and #2) for someone who is interested, the $$ may not be an issue or the deciding factor. The $$ has nothing to do with the appeal to me – even taking the $$ out of the equation, it is not what I would be looking for.

    Berkshire, I’m not trying to put words in your mouth or to assign what you mean with the words you used – I just wouldn’t use those phrases because of the what they conjure up in my mind.

  212. aj says:

    hmmm.. this is all very interesting. great posts guys :)

  213. NC Gentleman says:

    hmmmm things that catch my attention in a profile…

    educated, literate, looking for adventure, looking for an occasional escape, as comfortable in jeans as in an LBD, wants to meet once or twice a month, can travel without much notice, to name a few.

    I also look for shared interests — such as skiing, tennis, fishing, swimming, live music, working out, nice dinners, travel, etc.

    I also look for an SB that is looking to supplement their current lifestyle and if I went away, it wouldn’t make that big of a deal to them financially.

    I am guessing that every SD has unique interests though.

  214. BerkshireSD says:

    I think the marketplace reaction is a very fundamental one for the SD. Is this girl pricing herself in the market? If not what is that telling us?

    I agree this one is over priced.

    The picture is an excellent one, designed to attract the more substantial personalities who want to get to know more. It does not offer pure or quick sex.

  215. BerkshireSD says:

    So many ladies are on here looking for advice. How do they attract the right SD? What does an SD think about? How should they word things? What should they say and show and not say and show?

    Let’s let ’em know with some real world examples. SDs – you see that profile for the first time. What does it tell you? What are your reactions, thoughts and questions? Why?

  216. NC Gentleman says:

    I think that SB has a warped sense of reality. If someone was going to spend $5k to $10k a month on an SB, I would think that someone would want to spend about 8 to 10 nights a month with that SB, and not on a web cam.

    I saw numerous profiles that said — want to see you once or twice a month for a few hours — and then their amount desired was $3k to $5k — does an SD actually go for that?

    I am probably not the best to ask though, because evidently I am not a real SD :)

  217. SuthrnExec says:

    If I were looking, it would not interest me. Why you ask?

  218. samueljirele says:

    Its so interesting, the language used in the blog. I just started reading bruce lee’s “striking thoughts”. . . My spiritual life flows. If seekingarrangement flows then everything is fine.

  219. BerkshireSD says:

    Today’s profile:

    SD’s, what is your reaction to this profile?

    Profile Number 285812

    I’m Seeking: Sugar Daddy

    I Expect US$5,001 – $10,000 monthly

    Description: Will travel to meet you sometimes but a lot of our communication will probably be on the phone or computer. Am looking for monthly allowance which we will agree on.

  220. VillaCypris *276489* says:

    hehehe. yea!

  221. aj says:

    NC Gent – Lol! I think that is all too common!

  222. NC Gentleman says:

    Too funny southern – I have an ex-business partner that reminds me of… this guy would have the APPEARANCES of being this super religious, christian guy (prayed before meals, meetings, etc), but would then come up with these grandios schemes to basically screw people — we parted ways after a few months.

    Thanks for the clarification Villa :)

  223. VillaCypris *276489* says:

    No … small case… berkSD is an “idol” for worshipping… not a “spiritual being” (God)… 😉

  224. SuthrnExec says:

    I’ve always found this statement by Steven Weinberg very interesting:

    “Religion is an insult to human dignity. With or without it, you’d have good people doing good things and evil people doing bad things, but for good people to do bad things, it takes religion.”

    I don’t necessarily agree with every word of it, but the irony in the statement has always had a ring of truth in it for me.

  225. NC Gentleman says:

    lol Berkshire — don’t we all some times?? should that god be capitalized??? (jokingly)

    Hiya Villa :)

  226. BerkshireSD says:

    I prefer to think I’m god.

  227. VillaCypris *276489* says:

    hi NC :)


  228. NC Gentleman says:

    Interesting Kitty — I grew up in a Presbyterian house, but my parents were extremely hypocritical so I abandoned Christianity for Taoism — I like the “being one with nature” aspect of Taoism and its flexibility.

  229. ~*kittylainy*~ says:

    Villa: Exactly! I think amny in our generation are skeptical about organized religion and use it less and less as a source for “hope” and “faith”. Thus searching for alternate forms of “guides”. I myself believe highly of Karma and the Yin and Yang. I have leaned more towards the taoism believe system which is less about faith but philosophy

  230. VillaCypris *276489* says:

    Good morning ~~

    AJ – got it… :)

    kitty! me, too! i was born and raised catholic, and but have virtually dispatched with organised religion and it’s foundations on fear and guilt, especially in catholocism. i’ve spent years reading, thinking, researching different religions, thought patterns, ideas, from all over the world, and have developed a good framework which seems to work for me. KARMA 😉

  231. ~*kittylainy*~ says:

    What kind of sugar daddy or sugar baby are you? Traditional? Post-Modern?
    ~Traditional with a post-modern twist?! Both terms cannot be properly defined, as the entire ideology is fairly underground and new. Would “traditional” mean “dependant” and “post-modern” mean “independant”? I am looking for an arrangement that allows me to better and further my career while letting me be spoiled. I am a highly indepedant individual and plan to remain that way. I will not cater to a SD’s every wimsp but I will make him feel special.

    Does your spiritual life flow naturally with your sugar lifestyle?
    ~I was born catholic and now developed this non-religious view. I take bits and pieces of every religion to mold my own set of beliefs and guides to life. My spiritual life does not limit my views on relationships, so no.

    Have you found any sugar(s) to be more enlightened than those in the conventional dating scene? Are sugars more keen on what it means to “live in the now”?
    ~ There definitely is a sense that these sugars seem to have found a key to happiness that I myself are still figuring out where the lock is! They know what they want and they know how to get it. Where as in conventional dating scene, it seems what they want is “love” which is such an abstract convention that takes a lifetime to define. All sugars must live in the now in order to truly appreciate the arrangement. Once the future is questioned and the unknown is really brought to life, many will notice a bleak and almost depressing outcome. Of course, well prepared sugars might view it different. I think Sugars is one of those things that “all good things come to an end.”

  232. aj says:

    HotSB – he’s got to work to make the $! lol! I know it’s tough not to worry.

  233. aj says:

    VillaCypris! I may have just emailed you an entire book! LOL!

  234. He'sAHotSB says:

    yea…I think “my” SD lol is busy working…

    I’m worried!!! :(

    & I miss talking to him lol

  235. BerkshireSD says:

    BerkSB had a terrible picture and her outfit was completely sexless – fairly unattractive for that matter.

    I never asked her for a picture before we met. I think that she realized what that meant about me. I think it was one factor that got her to stick with me during the early days.

    For that matter, with that picture, SB had no trouble meeting pot SDs before me as well as during our hiatus.

    SB is genuinely what many men want. She can get men all day long just by being herself.

    I almost never asked for pictures before I met SBs. Only if their profile pic was impossible to see. I used to word the request something like ‘normal pics’ or even ‘no nudes.’

    Start to learn someone’s personality on the phone. Meet them in person and get to know them more.

    Let them get to know you and all you have to offer and why they should want YOU for their Sugar Baby.

  236. aj says:

    this is a great ray charles quote:

    “Affluence separates people. Poverty knits ’em together. You got some sugar and I don’t; I borrow some of yours. Next month you might not have any flour; well, I’ll give you some of mine.”

    HotSB – Perhaps he is busy with travel or work?

  237. He'sAHotSB says:

    one SD i’ve chatted to on messenger…twice lol

    he hasn’t been online sa.com or messenger for a week…!
    i wonder where he is…
    i’ve sent him an email…


    where are you!!!

  238. aj says:

    lol on a funny note at least i know EXACTLY what i look like now! jeez.

  239. aj says:

    yep, learning everyday. that’s the beauty of it :)

  240. SuthrnExec says:

    aj, you’ll be fine. I suppose you learned something about yourself in the process as well. I think next time you’ll know how to respond and be confident in your response, so no worries. Since there is so much still unknown in the initial contact with someone in this type of relationship, it is always best to go with your gut and not do anything unless you are absolutely comfortable. We’re here for you.

    Good afternoon HotSB!

  241. aj says:

    HotSB – me too! lol. we can hug each other!

  242. aj says:

    Suthrn…I’m good today! Thanks! This pot. sd made it very clear that the relationship he is seeking is ONLY physical. In his words “absolutely no attachments of a relationship” Don’t get me wrong, I was very torn on what to do, and these photos were not suggestive in anyway, just informative. As I said before I thought exposing the physical aspect was much less personal that exposing anything emotionally that is very personal to me. I don’t know, my head is spinning a bit about the whole thing…I never even let a boyfriend (or my husband for that matter) have photos like that…which is a whole other level of issues! Haha! Life is just so grey.

  243. He'sAHotSB says:


    I need a hug…


  244. SuthrnExec says:

    AJ, not sure what you mean by level playing field?

  245. SuthrnExec says:

    Thank you ma’am – how are you today?

    Just one more comment on your emailing of the picture – if I were you ladies (or men), I wouldn’t ever accommodate a request of that kind, especially when you’ve never met. Of course, if the relationship you seek is ONLY physical, I suppose it would be ok, but I don’t think that’s what most people are looking for. I have observed that when the relationship is based only on the physical attractiveness of one or the other or both, it won’t last and will be fraught with frustration. Please don’t take this a lecture, but it’s maybe more insight into why guys request this sort of thing – 98% of the time, it is for their own enjoyment and has nothing to do with the wonderful person that you are.

  246. aj says:

    In everyone elses sugar experiences do you find sugar dating to be a “level playing field”?

  247. aj says:

    Well said SuthrnExec.

  248. SuthrnExec says:

    > What kind of sugar daddy or sugar baby are you? Traditional? Post-Modern?
    I think that I am largely traditional, however, inasmuch as postmodernism is a distrust of theories and ideologies and by the drawing of attention to conventions, there is a part of me that would be postmordern. I don’t seek to be unique – each of us is unique by virtue of our individuality but I do seek to make my sugar feel appreciated, adored, respected for her incredible talents and mind, as well as simply taken by her beauty, both internal and external. She is indeed “one of a kind”!

    > Does your spiritual life flow naturally with your sugar lifestyle?
    Difficult question to answer on the blog without dominating the space, so suffice it to say that the answer is ”Yes, more and more all the time.”

    > Have you found any sugar(s) to be more enlightened than those in the conventional dating scene? Are sugars more keen on what it means to “live in the now”?
    I think so – in my limited exposure to sugars, the various circumstances that has brought them here has shaped and enlightened and I think there is an appreciation for what is “now”. The past has made us who we are today, but we don’t live there – we live in the now, a product of our past and how we chose to let it shape and mold us.

  249. aj says:

    BerkshireSD – You are right :) F#$! it! So he saw my body, big deal, it’s the same as every other womans. Onward, I will not waste another thought on him.

  250. BerkshireSD says:

    Why do you girls let it bother you if some anonymous jerk gets you to email him a picture and turns out insincere?

    Forget about these guys who will NEVER know who you are and get on with it without missing a beat in finding the relationship that is right for you.

  251. aj says:

    Good Morning sugar world!

    I would say I fall ever so slightly into the post modern sb. To me being a sb is about enjoying a life that I am working towards attaining on my own. It keeps me happy for the moment and motivated to continue on my own personal journey/quest for satisfaction, monetarily and otherwise.

    I am spiritual in a sense but keep this seperate from my sb life. Sb life is a little bit like a business to me, although that’s not to say I do not care for the person I am with. I’m just not looking to someone else for a sort of deeper level of understanding or satisfaction – I believe that can only come from within.

    I have not found sugars to be more enlightened.

    On another note, I still have not heard back from pot. sd that I sent the photos to. Perhaps you were right Henri Louis, he only wanted them for a “collection”. That makes me sick to my stomach. Oh well, perhaps I learned a lesson…AGAIN!

  252. lisa says:

    Good morning everyone. Getting ready to leave for work. I wish thursday was here already, I’m tired already, lol
    I would consider myself a traditional sb. I have never been a women’s libber or anything like that. Grew up wanting the traditional marriage and family, not career oriented at all, I work to pay the bills, that’s all.
    Looking for someone to have a light, non binding relationship with now as I have found that most relationships today are temporary so I will not waste my time dating a guy because he is nice, it will end, so I just want to have some fun and enjoy it while it lasts, whenever it happens, lol.
    I have learned not to expect much for men in relationships so at least I want to be in one where I don’t have to split dating costs, lol

    Have a great day everyone

  253. Natty*296451 says:

    Good morning everyone!!!! Hope the weekend treated you well.

    To answer these questions:

    What kind of sugar daddy or sugar baby are you? Traditional? Post-Modern?

    I guess I’d fall into the post-modern category but barely. I do like the idea of simplicity, but as I’m not a prostitute in the slightest, I believe that good company OUTSIDE of that part of an SD/SB relationship must be equally as enjoyable and fun if I’m going to participate in the latter.

    Does your spiritual life flow naturally with your sugar lifestyle?

    I keep my life separate from this situation, spirituality included. I think being an SB is an entirely different scenario and it’s not that I don’t think about my values and principles when it comes to spirituality, but I’m not what’s the American expression “On my moral high horse” I just do my best to be a good person in my regular and sugar life and keep it at that.

    Have you found any sugar(s) to be more enlightened than those in the conventional dating scene? Are sugars more keen on what it means to “live in the now”?

    I think I’ve found that sugars are more direct and know what they want and what they don’t want versus the conventional dating scene. I’ve spent hours being the girl and listening to the girl who just can’t figure what she’s looking for and how to get it and where to look for it, and here the women and men both know why they are here, what they want, and go for it. I’d say sugars definitely are more keen when it comes to living in the now because SD/SB relationship isn’t written in stone and they do know that it could end at any moment so you just enjoy the moments with this person and you take that experience with you good or bad.

  254. HenriLouis*294522 says:

    Good morning to you all on this remarkable day,
    Yes, I met her again in the twilight zone this morning.
    We even sang together after I took my guitar.
    Of course I woke up with a smile and a song in my heart, as it says in the bible (Salomon). It is this song:
    – Sugar in the morning
    – Sugar in the evening
    – Sugar at suppertime
    – Be my little sugar and love me all the time
    My multitasking brain came up with this evergreen by Johnny Cash in my dream. Most remarkable.
    Couldn’t we make this the national anthem of the site ?!
    Interesting new subject we have here on the blog.
    Although this site is for modern “freethinkers” I am definitively approaching it as a traditionalist. I mean her, my pot SB.
    She will get respect and affection.
    With me she will be cherished and safe.
    After all where do we find shelter ? In a love relationship.
    We might even grow to like each other sothat we will stay together (Awh Henri, so outdated ).
    Yes, my spiritual life flows naturally with my pot SB/SD lifestyle. I am spiritual and believe in the concept of “soulmate”. We do not live in a meaningless world. People have come into my life for a reason, they were sent for my growth in body and soul. Time has come to pass it on, I am convinced the girl who chooses me above many others to be my SB, will come. I will be the sunshine of her life. In fact some beautiful girl approached me last week with the concept of soulmate. I responded positively. She did not even open my letter in her mailbox. Remarkable !
    Surely I have met girls here more enlightened, but I have never joined a traditional dating site. So boring, waste of time. It is also a matter of difference in culture I am European and you are Americans. Besides, if you have found this website and join in, you are a shining example of being enlightened. You are even avantgarde in the eyes of most people.
    Sugars are more keen to live in “the now”. It forms part of the concept of seeking arrangement. You should have a practical approach to life, to be pragmatic is what life is all about. Carpe Diem.
    Off to the gym now, sothat she might admire my sixpack,

  255. He'sAHotSB says:

    HUGS JANEY! hehehe :)


    there is NO difference between the following, they are all the same!
    whether it’s…

    1. a husband and wife (or male/female…male/male…female/female)
    2. a father/mother and their son/daughter
    3. boyfriend and girlfriend (or bf/bf…gf/gf)
    4. an employer and an employee

    the words
    sugar daddy, sugar mommy and sugar baby?
    are just labels!

    ***The people that think “sd/sm/sb” relationships are just wrong/bad???

    what the hell were you thinking when you were writing your resume/cv/cover letter?

    yep! smile!!! :) lol

  256. OCSugarBaby says:

    What kind of Sugar am I? ~One of a kind…
    I strive to be a sugar that keeps her individuality yet softly melts into her sugar’s world.

    This is my first sugar experience and I am thrilled to have met someone who treats me better than I could have ever imagined. :)

  257. BerkshireSD says:

    Being a hard working mother putting up with the childish demands of her SD got to her.

    I really love this woman. She is the light of my life. Respect, awe, pride.
    And she’s made it clear no discounts no matter how nicely I speak about her.

    I have chosen to make my SD/SB relationship the primary one in my life…from a romantic standpoint it is the only one.

    We are getting close to living together on a long term basis, but that SB/SD foundation will likely remain. I think that best addresses the theme of this topic from my angle.

  258. VillaCypris *276489* says:

    Hi Janey ~ welcome to the blog! :)

    HotSB… nice poetry … !

  259. He'sAHotSB says:

    >the cheap and creep
    >or the heap and deep

    >I’m choosing!
    >the rich amusing?
    >or the bitch abusing?
    >this is confusing!!!

    I used these lines again from my past two poems…lol…

  260. Janey says:

    He’sAHotSB, Love the poem!

  261. Janey says:

    The concept of being a sugar baby/ sugar daddy is already post-modern. Perhaps this will be the new wave of dating.

  262. He'sAHotSB says:

    Have you found any sugar(s) to be more enlightened than those in the conventional dating scene? Are sugars more keen on what it means to “live in the now”?

    “Re: made”

    >the cheap and creep
    >or the heap and deep

    >I’m choosing!
    >the rich amusing?
    >or the bitch abusing?
    >this is confusing!!!

    the whore?
    or hoar?
    they’re both at the door!
    are they both poor?
    or do they just want more?

    tarzan with a tan?
    but he drives a can!
    or japan with a man?
    with five sedans!

    female SBs waiting for their mail…
    male SDs dating their male!

    are you waiting
    or mating? :)

    ……By He’sAHotSB


    free hugs!
    flea bugs?
    flee thugs!

  263. VillaCypris *276489* says:

    Do ostrich steaks have tryptophan in them?

  264. BerkshireSD says:

    No, SB is right here. She passed out while we were discussing the kids.
    Cute little snore tonight.

  265. VillaCypris *276489* says:

    No idea… is it… BerkSB????

  266. BerkshireSD says:

    I don’t understand the questions so I am just going to ask who the hottie in the picture is?

  267. VillaCypris *276489* says:

    I didn’t realise there is a new blog topic! And voila ~ I’ve been quoted! :) woo~

    Of course, “Car tier”… duh! I’m only staring at a red Cartier bag over on my marble shelf.

    I’ll have to ruminate on the questions…

  268. bostonTerrier says:

    What kind of sugar daddy or sugar baby are you? Traditional? Post-Modern?
    i believe i am a combination of the two where post-modern means the relationship involves a close friendship & support outside of companionship and whatnot.

    Does your spiritual life flow naturally with your sugar lifestyle?
    i don’t even know what this question is really asking so i am going to say … i don’t know / probably not.

    Have you found any sugar(s) to be more enlightened than those in the conventional dating scene?
    no. the sugar daddys i’ve had are exactly like guys i’ve dated my own age … with a little bit more financial success.

  269. He'sAHotSB says:

    What kind of sugar daddy or sugar baby are you? Traditional? Post-Modern?
    >>> I’m open for both! :) I think…..

    Does your spiritual life flow naturally with your sugar lifestyle?
    >>> hmmm…spiritual life?…I don’t believe in a god…and… :( I have no sugar lifestylet yet…


  270. He'sAHotSB says:


    VillaCypris!!! I had problems posting a comment!!! :(

    Cartier the brand…hehehe because he said no gucci or LV is worth it!
    is he spreading the…? lol