10 years ago
Sugar Karma

10 years ago
Sugar Karma

SD blogger JohnQ gave much savored advice on “how an SB can convince a hesitant SD that she actually likes him for himself, rather than solely for his money” in the last post. Click here to read!

It’s normal to take a break from your sugarlife every once in a while…

“Not much sugar in my life right now and i’ve been concentrating on other things so SA hasn’t been much of a priority.. I’m back for a while now, though!!!” SweetEuropean*264271

But don’t be surprised to see a familiar sugars face when you start your search again. Once you go sweet, you will repeat.

How often should Sugar Babies update their photos?

How do you find the time to search for and connect with potential sugars?

How do you get good Sugar Karma? Responding to ALL messages? Giving advice to newbies?

Leave a Reply

273 Responses to “Sugar Karma”

  1. christina says:

    Dc! You are from Seattle?! Me too! maybe you can let me in on the lifestyle out here…how’s the pickins’?!

  2. bob says:

    have a sb convince me that it’s ‘real’? been there, done that. got married, got divorced, had to get a restraining order. no thanks. not for me again.


    been here on an off for a while and met some interesting women. but this place is what it is. call me a cynic but i rather be a realistic cynic than just fooling myself.

  3. Ms.O says:

    I am new to this site as well…
    I want to find someone but I think that I ay to independant… I don’t have any boyfriend, I live on my own and I am just tryn to get through law school. I think that plus mu looks should get me somekind of attention on this site! Not to sound conceted, but I know what I am working with!!! lol
    Someone…anyone… give me some advice about this site.

  4. Ashley says:

    Hey everyone…
    100% new sugar babe and new to the site as well. A little and excited and nervous at the same time, but nevertheless… I am ready! I think I’m off topic for this post but was hoping to hear from sb’s what some of their sd’s salary was and what their allowance was from those sd’s. Just curious

  5. ThaBlkButtafly says:

    Hey everyone. WOW it’s been awhile since I’ve been on this site or its blog but now I’m back searching for an SD again. Hey Lisa I see you are still here!

  6. sasha says:


    First ,I must say that I love reading the blogs. and learn so much from them.

    Being that I’m a new sb I too have made some mistakes (2) and felt used.

    I think feeling a little vulnerable, hoping that you meet an honest man someone who likes and respects you and truly wants help because he cares.

    Believed all the promises in the world. thinking everyone is as honest as I am made me make some stupid mistakes that I regret.

    like sleeping with a guy on the first date

    another guy that we actually hit it off and we did sleep together a couple of times.. we discussed a little what the agreement would be. I was thinking oh let me just make it more natural didn’t want to feel like a prostitute . What a BIG mistake.

    yep those were my ONLY two SD’s so far feeling a little used and hurt I was unsure if I wanted to continue on this site. or those a real, honest man really exist on it.

    One thing I learned after reading this blog is not to act like you are desperate for financial assistants.

    Can someone tell me what is normal??

    Email? phone calls? text?

    If the guy hasn’t called me and after 3 weeks sent me an email. “sorry if you feel neglected just been very busy”. but I see him on line all the time.

    What is appropriate and not appropriate, how often should you expect to hear from these man? or do they call you a day before they want to meet?

    I have decided to give this another chance, but, I can really use your guidance and experience with this. Next time I want to come prepared.

    I would appreciate some advise form SD as well I want to know what would have made this guy act the way he did.

    I know I am an attractive women so it can’t be my looks, and I think I have even a better personality. So what is it?

    Also, is it normal for a SD to show interest and be excited about meeting but continue looking on the site??

  7. lisa says:

    I talked to my family as my daughter didnt’ call me. She kept going on abou if I was going to move to this other apartment with them. I asked her how much the rent was and she said 800 for 2 bedrooms. I told her that they are not going to let 4 adults live in a 900 square foot apartment as the place is nice and they have stricter rules than our ghetto apartments. I asked her how much 3 bedrooms were and she said 900 dollars. I checked the apartment website and they are not 900 they are 1075. I would be paying about the same as I pay now but with no privacy because my family doesn’t use ac and so I would end up paying the 300+ elec bills as my mom will only pay 80 dollars because doesn’t waste money on ac.
    We had a big argument on the phone and my mom said she was through talking to me and I just told my daughter i was going to hang up. So I guess I have no choice than to move with them which is the end of my life, living with my parents at 43 after I have come so far in the past 4 years. I dont’ know if they are going to be thrown out in 3 days or when there lease expires in 5 weeks. Either way once I give my 30 day notice, I’m stuck. I know I will not pass the credit check at the other apartment because I have 7 credit cards in collection and owe over 30k.

    My family has managed or ruin my life again, they’ve held me back all my life. :(

  8. RedMaru says:

    Jumping out of lurker mode to check in on everybody.
    Hey lisa…just read what happened keep head up don’t get discouraged. This is just my one cent but I wouldn’t move back with them. You’ve acomplished alot and to chuck it all in because your mom can’t follow the rules to stay in a apartment is not fair to you. Just by what you’ve posted you already know what you’d be getting into if you moved back home so you got to do what is best for you and it wouldn’t be selfish at all. I’m sure there is some alternative to help your parents. (big hug) Good luck!

    Off to the gym see everybody later

  9. lisa says:

    Creme my sd search is over, my life is over when I move with them. I love having my own place and have came so far to end up back with my parents, anyway you say it, I will be living with my parents. As far as dating, I would be ashamed to bring anyone to a home I share with my parents, most men my age are not looking for a grown woman living with mom and dad. Also what do I do when I walk them through the door and the fleas are all over them and the house smells of urine? I hate filth and my parents thrive in it. I will have to live in my bedroom and cook and every thing because their kitchen is always so filthy. Rotting food and junk every where. It is horrible, sounds crazy, but I swear it’s the truth.

    so I will probably have to give up all I enjoy and move with them to do the right thing but I dread listening to my mom screaming and arguing with my dad nonstop as I dealt with for many years. I will stay in my room and have nothing to do with any of them. I fail at everything I try and I thought I had suceeded but thanks to my lousy family, its’ over.

  10. CrèmeBruléeNY says:

    Lisa – a cautionary note: it may not be too wise to share this much personal info in a public forum.. could impact your SD efforts as well as a safety issue. Lastly, only thing I can say based on what you’ve shared is just do what’s best for you (Lisa) at this point. G’luck.

  11. Liebchen says:

    Well, if you do end up having to live with them again, it will be because you’re helping them out not the other way around. I think anyone, SD or otherwise, who would look down on you because of that isn’t worth your time.

    I think you should look up your local ombudsman for tenant issues. I know they broke the lease, but there might be some options left.

  12. NYC SB says:

    oh lisa – you are not a whore… i know what you are going through is terrible… things will get better because honestly they cannot get worse… and i know you are happy with your lover but maybe this living situation will allow you to look for someone who is not attached and will give you the same satisfaction that your lover does… other than that i dont know what to say to make you feel better about this terrible situation

  13. lisa says:

    Creme in Houston you can’t just get housing assitance that easy. My daughter is grown and working full time making more than I do and will be starting college in september. I work full time too and after years of struggling I’m actually surviving now but I have nothing extra for moving, no car to move anything, no way to move furniture, etc and I have horrible credit now so I would not pass the credit check at the apartments my daughter wants to live at. And if my parents can’t keep themselves in a dumpty ghetto apartment they are going to make it in a nice place as they have 10 times as many rules and strict pet rules too which my mom will ignore.

    My kiddo refused to live with me when I moved 4 years ago, she will not even spend the night with me because i am a whore for having sex out of marriage, she;s a fanatic too so I feel if I wasn’t good enough to live with for the past 4 years, why would she want to live with me now? I’m still a whore

  14. CrèmeBruléeNY says:

    Lisa – I’m not in your shoes but really all you can do in this case is watch out for yourself, and daughter. Make sure you’ve exhausted all govt help available, and there is plenty. Nothing shameful about that. Put your name on housing lotteries, etc. who cares how they feel about assistance? We’re talking about you and your kiddo–who comes first I’m sure.

  15. lisa says:

    NYC SB I don’t think my lover of 4 years is going to have time to go to a motel every time we get together. Our time together is limited and I don’t have all the free time I used to have to drive around looking for a room at 10 am. And I just feel that any sd that would contact me would expect a 43 year old woman to have her own place. I get litte repsonse the way it is and I dont’ think adding living with my parents and not having any privacy would help. What sd or boyfriend wants to deal with a 43 year old woman who lives with her parents?

  16. NYC SB says:

    Lisa – a true SD wouldnt mind getting a hotel room for you guys to meet. I personally have never brought an SD at my own place and I live by myself. Trust me if an SD is into you and is willing to be with you he will understand the situation.

  17. lisa says:

    at my mom’s apartment, it doesn’t take months, maybe to actually evict you but they put a lock on your door when your time runs out and you can’t get into your apartment. There is so many people defaulted on their rent that they are very strict now. So if you come home, you can’t get into your apartment and you would be stuck out in the 100 degree temperatures.

  18. lisa says:

    Creme my mom does not believe in social help and would never take section 8 housing because she says its for welfare whores. I went hungry at school during my childhood because we had little money and she wouldn’t let me get free lunch. I hate to say it but my mom is a nut case, that’s the truth

  19. lisa says:

    my daughter just turned 18. I have been divorced since she was a baby, dad is not in the picture, never has been. She works full time and I know she and my parents who get a little social security could get a 2 bedroom apartment for about 150 more than what they pay now but the insist they can’t afford with without I move with them which means we would have a 3 bedroom apartment and i would have to crowd a whole apartment full of furniture into a rather small master bedroom as I cannot put my nice furniture in the living room for their cats to urinate on and scratch.

    I lived with them for 14 years when my husband left so they are throwing that at me but after being dateless for 14 years I met someone and well they didn’t approve and asked to move which I did 4 years ago. It was the best thing i’ve done and after struggling for the first years I’m finally on my feet and proud of what i’ve accomplished even though I do live in the ghetto I love having my own place, it took me 39 years. Now I have to give it up in order to do the right thing and my life might as well be over as I know my married lover and any sd that I meet is not going to want to walk through a living room with my parents setting there, going to my bedroom, that’s just juvenile. And as I said they are filthy and their apartment smells so bad it almost knocks you down when you go in their door and I don’t want to live like that, how embarrassing. If I suggest they be a little cleaner, they would say that if I want my rights to date, they have their rights to be dirty. It’ s a lose lose situation all brought on because my religous fanatic mom decided to be dishonest and got caught after having lotsa pets for 18 years without paying a deposit

  20. Liebchen says:

    I know that here it takes a while to go through the whole eviction process, at least a couple of months, especially if you can get some sort of legal aid. In the end, it comes down to the sheriff showing up and throwing you out on the street, and of course it’s bad to have evictions in your rental history, but it might buy them enough time to find a new place. I don’t think you’re being a horrible daughter at all. It’s not like you kept dropping off animals at their place.

  21. CrèmeBruléeNY says:

    Lisa – have you looked into section 8 housing or Disability?

  22. PleasureSekr says:

    Hi all, there’s a new topic – YIPPEE.

  23. Tina says:

    Wow this is a tough situation, I’m sorry to hear that, I hope you make the right decision. How old is you daughter? where’s the dad?

  24. lisa says:

    my parents have lived at those apartments for 18 years and kept multiple pets (I mean like a dog and 3 or 4 cats) without paying. They also signed a lease and didin’t mention the pets so they broke the rules and the manatgement has every right to evict them. I kept telling my mom she needed to pay pet deposits before she got caught but she would just get mad and call me a whore and bring up everything i’ve ever done wrong (she is an angry person and always throws back your faults when you give her advice) She says she cannot pay the 1200 they want for 4 pets and she would rather live under a bridge and live there for the way they are treating her for breaking the rules. This is the second time she has been thrown out for pet violations, the first place she lived she got asked to move as the neighbors were complaining about the smell.

    I know I’m being selfish and a horrible daughter but I just can’t get an apartment with them even if it’s in a nicer place. My mom says she won’t care what I do but then again she doesn’t know about my sb lifestyle, only about my married lover so how am I going to bring new men back to my place, it would be impossible with the whole family sittiing in the living room.

  25. lisa says:

    Thanks and there’s more. My parents are filthy, they dont’ bathe, their apartment is full of fleas, roaches and pet urine. I could never date or have friends all the years we lived together because I was embarrassed. If we move into to an apartment together, with me working all day and them being home all day it will be filthy again in no time. My mom is a religous fanatic that thinks anyone who has sex outside of marriage deserves to die and she has even called me a whore. My daughter would not live with me when I moved because I was seeing someone. My mom says she took care of me all those years and my daughter and I know she did but I finally got on my own a few years ago and hate to go back to having no life and no privacy. I love my family and am very worried and don’t know what to do but if I dont’ move with them they will out on the street but then I will live the rest of my life with no lover, no friends, and no sds.

  26. Liebchen says:

    Lisa, that’s terrible. My parents have always been heavy on the guilt trips as well. If it’s a place that allows pets, could they come up with the deposit now, or is it too late? I actually have a lawyer friend here in Ohio that deals with landlord issues. I’m sure the laws are different state to state but he might have some tips, and it might make a difference that your stepdad is disabled, I’m not sure. I’m supposed to be seeing him tomorrow. You could send me an email if you want.

  27. NYC SB says:

    lisa sorry to hear that

  28. lisa says:

    Hi everyone Well my life is falling apart again. :( my parents are being evicted from their apartment for pet violations. It is their own fault for having multiple pets and not paying pet deposits for the last 18 years. I suggested my mom give the pets away and she said she will not and that I should feel bad because she and my daughter will be living under a bridge. I feel horrible but there isn’t a thing I can do because my mom broke the lease and the management has every right to evict her. She is saying the it will be my fault when she is homeless because I should move with her and my daughter into an apartment and share the rent. I am worried about my family but I cannot live with them again, i’m 43 and just left 4 years ago because living with them is like living in a prison. I told my mom this and she said it’s ok and she will close her ears when my lover is over. I cannot bring my lover over to somewhere I live with my parents as that is just weird and his privacy is important. She talks like she will let me live my own life but I know she won’t and besides how can I lead a normal life and be a sb if I am living in the same apt with my parents and grown daughter. I mean imagine walking through the living room with a potential sd, I would have to take him to the bedroom to have any privacy while my family is in the next room listening.

    I dont’ know what to do and I have no way to help as I live in a one bedroom apartment and none of us have cars so I can’t help them move anywhere and they are in their early 70’s and my stepdad is crippled.

    I guess I will have to give up my freedom and become a grown child again if I’m to keep their respect and my conscience. :(

  29. NYC SB says:

    haha Mina … cant say I have been there… maybe SD can make that happen for me soon… he does own his plane 😉

    My prior experience has been off line it just kind of found me it got me interested in the lifestyle and now I chose to pursue it further. If you want I can email you my profile number

  30. Mina says:

    NYC SB –
    Love love love every single bit of your date. I think it’s great and so refreshing to share success stories on this blog to give other gals (and guys perhaps!) an idea that it absolutely can happen.
    You have previous experience with this type of relationship, no? I would love to see your profile because I’m such a terrible Nosey Parker, lol.
    I prefer the Asia de Cuba in Buenos Aires to the one in NYC 😉

  31. NYC SB says:

    Liebchen – it happens to everyone on here… when i rejoined i probably reached out to about 20-30 SDs with minimal replies… my pics are on my profile unblurred… so I could have taken it as an insult or let it shatter my self estreem but instead I kept on looking… at the end of the day its their loss not yours 😀

  32. NYC SB says:

    Mina – this is the last success story I have – sorry its a copy and paste from the last blog 😀 You seem rather successful as well… would love to hear more about you

    I have a new SD… last nights date was out of this world… he is such a sweet sweet guy… DC said it best “If he wasnt married I would love to date him”…anyways Since he is in Philly and I am in NYC he asked me to meet him in Philly … we went to this incredible restaurant… had an amazing meal… i ordered a dirty martini as my drink … and it comes out with blue cheese stuffed olives (I DIED! bc that is my all time favorite drink and they only have it at Asia de Cuba in NYC… he remembered me telling him this over the phone…awwww)

    After dinner and great conversation he told me that he could send me home with a car or just in case he got me a room… in which he wasnt going to say in … since he didnt want to be presumptious

    We went to the hotel had a few more drinks there at which point he handed me an envelope (YAY SUGAR) and told me that he would like to continue this with me… so far so good… he is incredible!

    on a side note he looks a bit like richard gere without the white hair… just a little resemblance

  33. Liebchen says:

    Hi NYC SB and ginaZ, thanks! I do feel a little better now I just felt like screaming, “I’m cuter in person, d***it!” I’m trying not to be so sensitive. On another note, ginaZ, I think we might be talking to the same person, lol. I don’t think there are a whole lot of tatted rocker guys on this site… That’s weird, does that happen on the blog a lot?

    As far as the distance thing goes, I think I’m okay with it. There aren’t a lot of pot SDs in my area at all, so I don’t have much of a choice actually. I guess you would really have to click with someone for either of you to be willing to put in all the extra effort, though.

  34. Mina says:

    NYC SB –
    Would love to hear your success story! I apologize if you’ve posted before, but there’s too much to sift through…

  35. Mina says:

    I’ve flown to someone for the first meeting. Granted, we had spoken for months via email/text and on the phone so there was a high level of comfort. Had our schedules been more in sync we would have met sooner as I never had a “bad feeling” about him. (And btw, we’ve been seeing each other for over a year now.)
    Can he not travel to you? If not, sometimes you just have to trust your gut instinct and go for it, but only if you’re completely comfortable with the situation and not because you don’t want to upset him and miss an opportunity.

  36. NYC SB says:

    im getting used to this chopper jetting lifestyle 😀

  37. ginaZ says:

    Good mornin’ sugars. I have two meetings today, here’s hoping! will check back in later…
    In the meantime, there are a few pot SD who want to fly me in to meet. But I’m wary I suppose. Anything more than 100 miles gives me pause. i think it’s just easier with someone close by. How do others think?

    Liebchen, yeah I know how you feel about sending pictures. I already have three posted, and the one time I did send some pictures, the pot SD wasn’t satisfied, he wanted more. I was bummed to. Maybe a bit offended. I think three is fine on profile. Body, face +

  38. Mina says:

    How often should sugar babies update their photos?
    At least something to give the person on the other end an idea of who they are reading about/emailing. Something from a distance, or wearing sunglasses, or even the black line over the eyes. That being said, it should be a picture of YOU – not a sunset or a celebrity. To be honest I’d be wary of an SD or SB that posted a clear face shot, as discretion is and always has been a big thing with me.

    How do you find the time to search for and connect with potential sugars?
    I’m not searching, I have more than enough men and hobbies to keep me occupied.

    How do you get good Sugar Karma? Responding to ALL messages? Giving advice to newbies?
    I always have good karma in every aspect of life :) I don’t think it’s abolutely necessary to respond to all messages. If someone has emailed you a few times with the same boring lines, or you receive a generic email then there’s no need to. However, if someone put a little thought into the message but they aren’t what you’re looking for (due to location, age, etc) then a simple “No, thank you. Good luck!” is polite.

  39. CrèmeBruléeNY says:

    VC – Can’t remember how long ago it was but it might have been you.. the person had met a couple of SDs (through SA) who are from there..

  40. CrèmeBruléeNY says:

    NYC SB – yes! pack your bags.. I’ll have a chopper waiting.

  41. NYC SB says:

    Hi Liebchen – dont take it personally… with a site where so many SBs are available the competition is rough… dont take it personally … a chance to increase your odds is to try and appeal to a pot SD on a more personal level by pointing out certain personality traits or interest you may share

  42. Liebchen says:

    Thanks NC Gent. I guess I wasn’t really seeing it that way. Maybe I’m not used to all the competition either… I was definitely starting to get a little offended.

  43. NC Gent says:

    Hi Liebchen — more pics on your profile may screen the pic collectors — plus you can nicely tell guys that you have already posted three pics when they want more. I would say I only hear back from about 3 out of 10 women that i send my pic, and men have a lot better odds on here. I used to get bummed out about that, but then I realized that when I breeze over profiles with pictures, there is only about 1 in 20 that catches my eye. There are widely varying personal tastes out there, and you can’t take the rejection personally or it will drive you nuts! Happy hunting!

  44. Liebchen says:

    Hi everyone! Hope you all had a great weekend. I’m a little sad, my first sd seems to have poofed. Sigh, guess he was too good to be true. I’m trying not to take it personally, but, well, that’s a little difficult. On top of that, probably 9 out of 10 times I send someone a pic, they stop emailing me back. I heard someone mention picture collectors before, does this happen a lot? I’m thinking about putting more pics on my profile to avoid all the wasted time.

  45. NC Gent says:

    NC Gent reporting for duty!

  46. SuthrnExec says:


  47. NYC SB says:

    where is everyone?

  48. NYC SB says:

    CB girlie – HIIIIIII 😀 Wanna go sugar hunting in Monte Carlo? LOL

  49. NYC SB says:

    Miss Nutella – I will email you :) thank you for the kind words

    Tina – hmm from personal perspective I am not a big fan of getting sugar each time you meet… the pay per play arrangement makes me feel a bit cheap… I would suggest you do a monthly allowance… also if he forgets next time (and this might happen) you will be put in a situation where he might think its ok for him to just play with you… honestly its an uncomfortable conversation and unless you are looking for a sugarless lover you need to have it. Simply say “Daddy dear did you forget something” …

    Also as far as the poof SD email him and say “I had such a great time with you. Out of sheer curiosity would you mind telling me why you are no longer interested?” It could just be that he felt you were no longer interested and there was miscommunication between the two of you…

  50. SuthrnExec says:

    Good morning peeps!

  51. lisa says:

    Good morning everyone. Getting ready to go to work. Getting off early today.

    SweetEuropean is in Nice, France which is next to Monte Carlo, maybe that is who you were thinking about?

    Have a great day everyone.

  52. Jasmine says:

    im coming in at the oddest times

  53. Jasmine says:

    did everyone went into sugarsleepland again?

  54. VillaCypris *276489* says:

    don’t know…

  55. VillaCypris *276489* says:

    CrèmeBruléeNY Says:

    June 21st, 2009 at 1:30 pm
    I recall someone on this blog from Monte Carlo, no?

    Hi CBNY

    I lived in Monte Carlo for one year… I don’t if it’s me to whom you are referring… but I can’t recall anyone else mentioning they are “from” there…


  56. ginaZ says:

    With NSA there are never any guarantees, one always hopes it will continue. sometimes in the case of SD, he may be feeling guilty (if married), simply change his mind and spend time with different women, or in some cases he may realize the age difference is too great. Always articulate what you would like, but sometimes it’s better not to ask and move on. You sound sweet Tina, I would take your time. Have an understanding before you give more of yourself than you should give.

  57. lisa says:

    Tina I had the idea sd too, he contacted me and we met 5 days later and he gave me half my allowance on the first meeting and the rest on the second along with some gifts. He was great but then on our last meeting he mentioned having some financial issues and gave me 300 and said I should look for someone else. Haven’t heard from him since that last evening. Not sure what happened as he is not on the site anymore either.

    Birdy , his user name isn’t “explorer” is it? If it is , disregard it as that guy has emailed everyone and will be in everyone’s area in 2 weeks, he’s a fake. It’s difficult to say whether to bring it up be for me personally I never just meet someone without having some idea. The idea sd will bring up the subject first but if he doesn’t, then you need to and if he starts talking about sex, then you need to bring up the allowance part as many guys are looking for free sex.

    Have a good night everyone. I’ve got to get to bed soon as I have to get up early for work tomorrow.

  58. Birdy says:

    Good evening everyone! I wanted to reach out for some advice.I received an email from a potential SD, he will be in my area and wants to meet.He also wants to exchange emails, not really sure what to say without sounding desperate or plain. My questions is should I discuss an arrangement before we meet?

  59. Tina says:

    We talked about an allowance for each meet, but i’m thinking of doing just a monthly one which is more secure, I don’t want to get use when he’s not keeping his words. My recent SD just left me =(, Well he didnt give me an explanation and I saved both of us the trouble of asking why. He was great, we were together for a month, we saw each other 3 times. During those 3 dates, he took me out to the most expensive restaurants, we went out for drinks, a couple of times he got a nice hotel, and once he took me to long Island to his beach house. In one meet he spent about 1500 on me lol, dining, hotel, and he gave me $500 each time for pocket money. The time he took me to his beach house I had to leave the same night and i didn’t drive up so he got me a car service to drive me home which he paid for. he was just perfect, should I have ask him why he didnt want to pursue it?

  60. lisa says:

    Did you discuss him giving you an allowance for each meet or did you talk about a monthly one? My most recent sd paid me for the whole month on the second date and we weren’t intimate till our 4th and last date. This was not typical though as I just hit the jackpot on that one. You have to decide whether to discuss it with him or give him time. Do not be intimate with him again though if he doesn’t bring up the allowance thing. The 300 might have been bait to see how many times he can get for that.

  61. Tina says:

    Right now I’m seeing someone and not knowing what to expect I asked him to give me 300 for each time he does see me. he lives pretty close so he’s able to see me at least twice a week. The first time we met, we actualy had a lot of fun, we were intimate and it was great, and he did give me 300 as promised. We met later in the week and he had me in his office and I surprised him with a mini skirt and some heels on and gave showed a great time which we both enjoyed a whole lot except this time he didnt give me my allowance and I didnt feel comfortable asking for it. Do you think he forgot about it, or he’s just fake, I don’t know what to think, can he be trusted? any suggestions of what would be a better arrangement?

  62. lisa says:

    I seen my sd 3 times that month and got 1100 and then he gave me 300 for one meeting the next month before it ended

  63. lisa says:

    Well I had my first sd who wasn’t really sd material meaning he worked a regular job so I didn’t get a whole lot of allowance but what I got did help me and it was my first attempt so I was knew at it.

    The most recent one was giving me 1k for a weekly visit but it only lasted a month and a few days so he did give me partial allowance for the next month even though the arangement ended on the 4th of the month.

    I think it’s best to avoid the guys that make less than 100k and any guy who has an allowance listed that is more than his monthly income as he’s obviously a fake. It depends on how often you want to see him. Personally I would rather get 1k a month and see the sd 3-4 times a month than to get 3k and be expected to see him 3 times a week as that’s too much. You want to have time to enjoy the allowance and not have all your free time going to the sd, that is without you are not working and it’s your only income but if you work like I do, you don’t want to give away all your free time.

    Also consider that if the sd travels to you or you travel to him, that might take away from your allowance as a local sd won’t have that expense thus there’s more to spend on you.

    I’m currently between sds but I set my desire atleast 1k a month for 3-4 visits.

  64. Tina says:

    I have a problem determining how much money should a SD offer her SB
    How do u know how much to ask for? let’s say the person makes about 100k, should u be considering how much they make?I don’t want to ask for too little or too much, if we set up an allowance for each time we meet, how much do you think the person should be giving me?

  65. Tina says:

    How do u know how much to ask for? let’s say the person makes about 100k, should u be considering how much they make?I don’t want to ask for too little or too much, if we set up an allowance for each time we meet, how much do you think the person should be giving me?

  66. lisa says:

    I was married for several years and have been divorced forever. Spent many years looking for mr right only to find mr wrong. Being that i’m in my early 40’s most of the men my age are either single and looking for younger women to marry and start families with or they are divorced with kids, ex wife, child support,etc and won’t be completely unattached from the ex till the kids turn 18. I found that these men have very little time for dating or they want to include the kids in everything when I was looking for one on one time. So I chose sugardating as I dont have to worry about the guys personal issues and i’m not marrying him and his problems. I will look for a husband in 10 years or so when the men my age have their kids all grown up and have time to give 100% to a relationship. My daughter is grown but so many men have children in their 40’s and even 50’s that the men I was meeting for serious dating had toddlers when my daughter was almost grown and i’m just not looking for that. Been there, done that, now adult time.

  67. ginaZ says:

    Lisa, I’m totally with you there. though I will at some point resume my search for a more egalitarian relationship, marriage. for now, fun and excitement and financial assistance sound very appealing. I have something to offer beyond the physical even in this type of relationship. My Ex, wanted a wifey, but didn’t pamper or spoil in the least, he did cook though, and was very good looking, but took me for granted.

  68. lisa says:

    I used to be looking for a serious relationship, even a husband but after seeing how men are today (not the providers and protecters of the past, and yes I’m a very traditional person whose goal was to marry, have children and be a homemaker) I see no reason to have a serious relationship. If i’m going to continue to work hard, pay my own bills, etc, why would I want to get involved with a guy and take on doing his laundry, cooking for him, and sleeping with him only to be dumped eventually? Now i’m out for fun and financial benefits, no more useless relationships where I do all the giving.

    I still can’t get over this old men who think a young woman is going to want to move in with them and be faithful to them, spend their best years with them till the old coot dies, and not get any allowance or spoiling. I think most women on this site are looking for fun and excitement and financial assistance without giving up their independence.

  69. ginaZ says:


    Yes there are a certain percentage, maybe 30% that aren’t real SD. They are looking for a very young woman to grow old with, young enough to be both daughter and wife, and then there are the posers, they don’t have a dime to there name, or pretenders. some men, are on the site because, “there are a lot of pretty women, but hell if I’m going to give anyone an allowance or gift, especially if they want it.” Then there are the predators, the men who prey on younger women, and of course the women who use the men, cash in the plane tickets, bait and switch…

  70. lisa says:

    ha I just got an email from a guy. I look at his profile and he’s not looking for a sb, lol duh what’s he on a sb site for?? He is looking for a serious relationship with a younger woman and will share what he has with here, as in “live with him” His message? “Hi, how are you?” DElete

  71. lisa says:

    Good afternoon ginaZ No emails or views for me today and i’m on 2 sites :( I’ve got this coming friday and saturday off and my family is going someplace saturday so i’ve got a free saturday and nothing to do.

  72. ginaZ says:

    (She peers out from shadows) Hi:) Happy Father’s day to anyone who is a father. Me, lots of emails with Potential SD, two meetings tomorrow. Hope everyone is good in sugarland:)

  73. lisa says:

    time to wake up Nitemare!
    Just got home. Didn’t see my dad today. Called over to my parents’ but they dont answer.

  74. NitemareSD says:

    I’m available for a good time, but I have to take a nap first.

  75. PleasureSekr says:

    Anyone wants to come out and play?

  76. CrèmeBruléeNY says:

    I recall someone on this blog from Monte Carlo, no?

  77. Liebchen says:

    Lol, okay this is funny, I just wanted to share. I’ve received three messages from the same guy, and each time he signs a different name at the end. Give me a break, ha.

  78. NitemareSD says:

    How do you get good Sugar Karma?

    I make my own Karma each day; that way I can season it to taste.

    How do you find the time to search for and connect with potential sugars?

    I use the time normally allocated to sex when in an SB relationship. That way not enough sex leads right to SB replacement.

    How often should sugar babies update their photos?

    After each trip to the hairdresser.

    Any more questions?

  79. NitemareSD says:

    I can’t even recognize myself in my profile. If I ever get accused I’ll just deny it and ask why the accuser was on such a site!

    Dorky, what’s that chics number? I promise I won’t tell where it came from. 😮

  80. gurlnextdoor says:

    Stormcat that’s a great idea! :)

  81. Stormcat says:

    Hey all, Good Morning
    Wow so many new members I hardly recognize the place. Welcome everyone.
    Dorky and others who have picture concern, I have been thinking about the acceptable picture that could meet the goals of posting a photo without the negatives of loss of privacy etc. I dislike pics with big blacked over bloches on the face. But realize that the photos at least show the persons figure and some sense of personal style. I realized that a generic stylish hat and pair of sunglasses are at least as effective at creating the necessary level of obscurity to protect ones identity while still conveying the desired level of communication. Additionally, make your location information more general by giving a broader name than your specific town/city. Such as Greater New York City rather than Scarsdale or Fairfield County rather than Bridgeport. By being a little more careful in your selection of content you should be able to inbue your profile with enough doubt that no one will be able to identify you with sufficient confidence that they would risk the embarresment of bringing it up falsely. And if they ever did bring it up you will still have the option to confidently deny it and mitigate damages.

  82. Katrina says:

    Hey, DorkyGuy –

    Stop being so cheap and just pay for your membership – that way you can be private. JMO

  83. gurlnextdoor says:

    Morning everyone, seems like I’m up bright and early once again against my will lol. DorkyGuy if your a paying member you don’t have to have up a photo. :)

  84. lisa says:

    Good morning everyone
    Getting ready to leave for work, very tired as I didn’t sleep well last night. Trying to cut out the ac to get my electric bill under control but it’s 90 degrees in my bedroom, slept with fan blowing on me and now I have a sore throat.

    Have a good day everyone

  85. DorkyGuy says:

    Awkward moment…

    I just ran across one of my 17 yo daughter’s friends with a SB profile in my area. This girl is a drama queen, and if she sees my profile, the first thing she’ll do is contact my daughter.

    Luckily, this happened on another site, and I just deleted my profile… no harm done. But, if she keeps seeking out a SD, there is a high probability that she would find this site and find my profile.

    Has anyone else encountered a situation like this and how did you handle it? Looks like I may have to go incognito :/ Difficult to do when the site requires a picture.

  86. jasmine says:

    did everyone went into sugarsleepland?

  87. jasmine says:

    yay my mom just came home!

  88. ginaZ says:

    Got to have something in common, as tempting as a rose and $200 may be!

  89. ginaZ says:

    PrideandPromise, all the way from NY to Cali? for those SD who travel it’s doable, I know I’d welcome an arrangement, whereby I travel to the East coast (NYC) I’d feel bicoastal and would add to the allure of an arrangement.

  90. PrideandPromise says:

    On a whole other note, what have other SB’s done in the case of an out of town SD or visiting one? Have any of you ever considered a SD, traveling to them for example ona regular basis?

    * My first SD came all the way out from New York! (I live in California.) I would definitely be willing to travel to him.

    I also went on my second date of the week. This SD was…okay, I suppose. He took me to sushi, bought me a rose, and gave me two hundred at the end. I felt like we had nothing in common, though.

  91. jasmine says:

    hope so,she had an asthma attack before she started dialysis on thursday

  92. gurlnextdoor says:

    Aww Jasmine sorry to hear about your mom, I hope she will be ok.

  93. gurlnextdoor says:

    Once again just got off work but can’t blog for long. My lover will be here in the morning to see me before I go to work so gotta be ready for him and talking about him paying my car insurance bill, lol. :)

    Welcome to the blog all the newcomers. Glad to have you here with us.

  94. jasmine says:

    good night lisa! thnks for the heads up!

  95. lisa says:

    Sorry to hear about your mom, hope she is better.

    This guy doesn’t look rich to me and the email was so impersonal like copy and paste

    gotta go to bed now
    Good night

  96. jasmine says:

    what a sucker…..now i had experience with a poof daddy

  97. jasmine says:

    besides i wasnt planning on going anyways,my mom landed in the hospital two days ago

  98. lisa says:

    Yes it sounds fake I didn’t respond back

  99. jasmine says:

    he wrote you that?!

  100. lisa says:

    that’s him

    His email to me on thursday

    “I have to admit that it took most of the day to finally reach the proper individuals at the Websters dictionary, however, it didn’t take long for them to agree with my point.

    There is no longer a need for a verbal description for the term beauty.

  101. jasmine says:

    read the blog i meant darn chicago heat

  102. jasmine says:

    i just the blog whats the profile name? mine is mike

  103. lisa says:

    Hi Jasmine

  104. jasmine says:

    lisa ya there? :)

  105. ginaZ says:

    Night night Lisa:)

  106. lisa says:

    I wouldn’t mind seeing him occasionally but since he does’t want a regular dating relationship and won’t do the sd thing, it won’t work out.

    Gotta get ready to go to bed soon, gotta work all day tomorrow. Have a good night

  107. ginaZ says:

    Lisa you are right. The SD should make the first move after the meeting during the meeting.
    I even notice how he treats others, if he leaves a big tip. I think these are all signs.
    And the boot call thing, yeah not cool unless that’s what you want too.

  108. ginaZ says:

    Looking for a SD is like dating in a way. And by that I mean meeting someone like you would on Match or the equivalent. I usually never expect more than maybe the dinner, and always hope there may be a connection. But, before you meet whether here or elsewhere, talk IM, feel a certain potential. There’s always some risk involved, but in my experience the greatest risk has always been giving ones heart and being hurt. Lisa, hopefully you (me too) will meet a wonderful SD, but I’m still hoping for cupids arrow one day soon.

  109. lisa says:

    nothing physical happens on the first meeting but it is important for the sd to take the first step in the exchange as if a woman takes the first step, she risks being used whereas the man only loses money and if he’s a true sd, he won’t miss it.

    You are giving him your time when you meet them which should be worth something. Even if nothing is taking place physically, remember how many times guys say they are not exchanging money for sex. There’s an opportunity to prove it, lol give it just for the company and conversation,

    Right now I’m sdless, no prospects, I couldnt mold my ex boyfriend into a sd, he just thought he could show up a year later and start a booty call relationship instead of the great dating relationship we had before. I suggested financial assistance to him, he brought me 20 dollars, lol He drives a 50k call too

  110. ginaZ says:

    Hey Lisa-

    Are any of them going to give you a gift or anything or is it just a meet?
    No, maybe? I think sometimes, especially if you had a good conversation on the phone and the meet up isn’t far I don’t assume that I will get a gift. If I’m traveling, perhaps I may get the sense they will, or they will come out and say it in so many words. One thing I won’t do ever, is anything more than the meet. A hug, a quick kiss, holding hands, this has happened, but a natural thing.

  111. YummyNutella says:

    NYC SB–your advice on the columns are so helpful! Congrats on your date :) Im a young newbie sugar babe and could use an awesome SB friend like you who knows what she is doing. None of my girlfriends have SDs, so its kind of hard to share this with them. Is there a way you can email me? Im nutella_nutella09 at yahoo…i hope u write! 😀

  112. lisa says:

    edit my last 3 first meets.

  113. lisa says:

    Well I have no sd and I gave me ex boyfriend a second chance last thursday evening and he isn’t looking for anything worth my time, just booty calls but not willing to be a half way sd and has poofed. lol

  114. lisa says:

    traveling would be fun but since I work I can’t.
    I haven’t had two sds dates in a day but I have had two lovers in a day (I’m actually a very nice girl) and it just happened that way between my regular lover and my boyfriend back when I had one.

    Are any of them going to give you a gift or anything or is it just a meet? My last 2 first meets have involved shopping or cash gifts, in which each sd told me ahead of time so I had something to motivate me

  115. ginaZ says:

    Glad to know all is well Lisa! Hoping we both have wonderful SD’s soon:)

  116. ginaZ says:

    Two on the same day may be pushing it, but I will be in the mode, dressed to impress. Both men I had great conversations with, both very different. One is late 50’s, businessman, lives by the ocean we will be taking a stroll and chat. The other is a rocker, early 40’s, tattoo’s who I will meet at a dive bar.

    On another note rejoined the gym, as I must get back into tip top shape. Travel is tricky thing. One PO SD offered to pay for air, but I’m hesitating as our phone conversation wasn’t of the warm and fuzzy sort. In the past two years back I met who would become my SD, I drove to him, 1 1/2 hours. We had already spoken over the phone and felt comfortable taking this chance. We met at a Sushi rest. he gave me $300 for meeting, got a hotel room for me, and the next day he visited me for breakfast., ad I drove back home. From there it lasted 9 months. So it’s possible. But always, always, trust your intuition.

  117. lisa says:

    Hi ginaZ

    Just got done cleaning my apartment. I got one email today but I don’t think I will answer it. The guy is middle eastern and I really don’t want to get involved with someone so different. I was married to a middle eastern man and there are too many differences. He didn’t sound like an sd either. Other than than I have 0 response.

    sorry about your date, hope monday’s dates go well but it’s probably double stress trying to meet both on the same day.

    I would never travel to a sd as I have a job and can’t just go out of town. Also as far as a traveling sd, he would have to stay at a hotel the first few times because I wouldn’t want a stranger in my house. I would prefer that we would be both stay at a hotel if he was visiting and there’s not much excuse as there are two nice hotels within blocks of me.

  118. ginaZ says:

    Hi:) the date was a no go last night, but rescheduled for Monday. So two Potential SD meetings on Monday. Afternoon & night. Lots of other emails and phone conversations with others, so hopefully something will happen!

    On a whole other note, what have other SB’s done in the case of an out of town SD or visiting one? Have any of you ever considered a SD, traveling to them for example ona regular basis?

  119. Jalisa says:

    any tips on how to get a SD for a 1st timer?

  120. lisa says:

    Good afternooon everyone. Just back from work. Had a customer grab my stocking cart and ram me in the side and comment that I was getting paid by the minute not the hour. Very rude. I kept saying excuse me as he pushed cart into me. I was waiting at the end of the aisle for him and his mother (he was like 60 himself) to move out of they way as they were stopped at the end of the aisle and not even looking at me he grabbed my stocking tub. I put my curse of death on him though.

    still 0 emails in my box.

    Hi Gail :)

  121. DreamyPrincess says:

    HI guys, I am somewhat new, but so far have been totally lurking the blog. Lisa you are hilarious, and girlnextdoor you sound awesome!

    I’ll answer the questions first:

    How often should sugar babies update their photos?

    I update mine whenever I have a new super cute photo taken. All of mine are within the last month (my girlfriends and I take our cameras everywhere and take tons of photos)

    How do you find the time to search for and connect with potential sugars?

    I only work 2 days a week, and it is summer, so no school. I have tons of time for that!!!

    How do you get good Sugar Karma? Responding to ALL messages? Giving advice to newbies?

    i only respond to messages that have more than one line. I would prefer to chat first via IM and then if that goes well I will call the pot SD.

    As far as my experiences, I have been messaged quite a few times. Some of the men were total creeps! I have met 2 potentials that are very promising. One came to my town, spent a lovely evening together chatting and laughing and shared a bottle of wine. He only stayed one night and I did not stay at the hotel with him, but came to see him again in the morning. When he was leaving he handed me an envelope with (a substantial amount of) cash in it. We have plans to meet again soon (tomorrow) as he will be in my city. So far it was lovely, and I hope that he will want to make an arrangement happen between us.

    Another I have just chatted via email and talked on the phone once, he sent me links to his photos and information about his job, so I’m not sure how that one will go yet! We will see.

    I promise not to be a lurker on the blog anymore!

  122. Gail says:

    Morning Chicagocutie,
    (smile) you remind me of me the first time I logged in and decided that I wanted more, fun, excitement, travel and lifes little luxuries. I too felt that I was too shy….and then bam!!!! lol….I realized that if I didn’t do something…I would be doing nothing.

    So simple to say…just be yourself : ) Take the time to extend yourself outside of the norm. No one knows you…but yourself….you can be and do whatever your want.

    Also…I look at sugar dating much like regular dating with lotsa sugar on top. If you don’t like what you are getting…shake it up, down and around. But you need to know when to move on…..

    Jump in…you can figure it out…because you are not alone and we will be here to help you : )

  123. chicagocutie says:

    I’m new to the whole sugarbaby lifestyle and have been at it for almost seven months. I haven’t met anyone on here yet and i’m too shy to message a guy first. I was wondering if any of the bloggers have any tips or advice.

  124. lisa says:

    edit I “liked” the first one sorry i’m still asleep as my friend kept ringing my phone at around midnight last night saying “what are you doing? are you sleeping?” it’s like of course as I have to get up at 6 am to go to work, I can’t sleep till 11 like her

  125. lisa says:

    Good morning everyone

    Nitemare I looked at your pics and I live the first one in the purple dress but you do need to show more cleavage, lol
    Getting ready to go to work now. Saturday is always a hard day. Have a great day everyone

  126. Lady*A*327719 says:

    Hey all! So I’m the biggest SA blog lurker :) and have always found the comments super interesting and insanely helpful. So I’m semi-new to the sugar bowl. I have a maybe SD that I met off the site but things are a little off hence the “maybe.” We had decided within the first few dates that we would have a mutually beneficial relationship BUT I guess I’m not entirely satisfied with the benefits coming my way. I mean I don’t think my expectations are out of this world but what I’m getting from him now I’d get from my ex for no reason, and he was a full time student with a part time job. So now I’m guessing that I’m being duped and he’s not really an SD. So what do I do guys??!?! I’m painfully polite, and would probably never be able to call him out. And asking him flat out seems rude. So any ideas would help xoxo :) and just for good karma here are my answers to the questions:

    How often should sugar babies update their photos?
    *Probably every six months or so. Pictures from 2yrs ago don’t cut it.

    How do you find the time to search for and connect with potential sugars?
    *I try to go on as often as possible but find that i get easily discouraged by the lack of potentials

    How do you get good Sugar Karma? Responding to ALL messages? Giving advice to newbies?
    *I think responding to all messages is kinda silly. Sometimes I get a generic one liner or a repeat offender. Also sometimes they are downright crude. If the guy obviously read my profile and put some thought into his e-mail it’s best to respond even if you are not interested. As far as advice goes thats good karma all around :)

  127. Liebchen says:

    Lol, Nitemare, how kind of you. That has never been a particular problem of mine, though.

  128. NitemareSD says:

    Would anyone be willing to look at my pics and give me a little advice? It would be much appreciated.


    No, but as soon as you get to the point where they disappear right after sleeping with you I will come in on that one.

  129. Liebchen says:

    Hi sugars! Just coming out of lurk mode for an update and a little more off topic advice… I had my first sugar date last night. It was probably the best first date I’ve ever had with anyone. Let’s just say that I don’t have much experience with men of his class, and it was something I won’t soon forget. Unfortunately, and I was aware of this before we met, he has a lot on his plate, including other SBs, so if I do see him again it will be irregular at best. So my search will continue.

    Which leads me to my question. I am still pretty new to the site and I get a pretty fair amount of emails. But, the thing is this: The picture I have on my profile has a heart sticker over my face. So I’ll exchange a few emails with someone, send them a few pics with my face included, and poof! they are gone. Seriously? I know there’s nothing wrong with my face. Would anyone be willing to look at my pics and give me a little advice? It would be much appreciated.

    Have a good weekend everyone.

  130. gurlnextdoor says:

    Aww PandP that’s sad to hear. Yeah there should be some way to stop, if not at least hinder, people from stealing other people’s profiles. Mine never got stolen to my knowledge. So maybe mine was too boring to be stolen, lol. :)

  131. PrideandPromise says:

    That’s terrible! One guy just got mad at me, saying I had multiple profiles. Obviously someone has stolen mine. I wish I could figure out who and if there was any way to stop them. =[

  132. gurlnextdoor says:

    Newbie that’s great news to hear! :)

    I’m dead tired from work and going to my parents’ religious retreat for their church. Day 2 is tomorrow followed by more work, argh! Can’t wait to see my lover/future SD on Sunday. I think he’s bringing chocolates… :) Anyway just stopping in to say hi.

  133. Ryan says:


    Just curious if any of the men searching for SM on here have found one? I have tried for years and with no luck.

  134. Newbie says:

    just wanted to say hi and give an update!

  135. Newbie says:

    Hello all! I’m sorry to have been MIA – busy with work and I now have a SD!!! We have met a couple times now…and always nice dinners and places… perhaps some shopping soon. Hes a nice guy very sweet and not at all pushy! I feel lucky.

  136. lisa says:

    Hum seems like everyone has sugardates tonight and i’m stuck home with Percy and my chicken strips.

  137. lisa says:

    Hi DC back with the chicken strips, luckily the place was empty and I got quick service. I’m starving.

  138. DC says:

    Have fun GinaZ!

  139. DC says:

    That’s half what I pay in Seattle Lisa for a one bedroom but this hood is safe. Sorry you live in such a crappy area. I hope someone comes around soon to spoil you

    I am awaiting the first SD I met from this site. We met for coffee and he gave me $200. I invited him over for coffee and home made creme brulee. He is a very sweet man and we are going to swap sugar stories. Should be fun.

  140. lisa says:

    Hope you have a great sd meeting tonight :) I’m headed down to whataburger for some chicken strips and gravy

  141. ginaZ says:

    Trying to reach my PO SD for my meeting tonight. Wish me luck if it happens! Hope you can escape your domicile soon and venture out Lisa. Will be back soon:)

  142. lisa says:

    he’s gone finally I can get myself together and get something to eat

  143. lisa says:

    If I had 1400 a month to spend I could live in one of those really nice new midrise apartments not far from me with sauna, heated pool, great patios, exercise room, et. actually I could get a one bedroom for 1000. I have a one bedroom in a ghetto neighborhood where no one speaks english, high crime, ugly area but only 3-4 blocks from one of the best areas of town and I can see a major medical center from my porch. Great area surrounding my ugly area.

  144. ginaZ says:

    480 a month wow, you definitely don’t live in Los Angeles! And $1400 a month for you would go much further.

  145. lisa says:

    yaa he’s vacuuming up his mess, I hope he’s leaving soon , lol

  146. lisa says:

    my rent is 480 a month plus water and electric.

  147. lisa says:

    well my day’s gone, he’s still here, come on I need to walk down and get some food. It’s bad enought I have to walk in 100 degree heat 3 blocks but waiting all day is worse

  148. lisa says:

    I live 4 blocks from the mall so retail therapy is minutes away when i’ve go the cash. Right now i’m in between sds.

    everything this guy wanted to do for a sb involved something that he wanted like fishing, dancing, traveling to Thailand with him, etc. I had mentioned that I needed to get some new contact lenses ( I was on my last few pairs with no money in the future to order more. He said that if we got along he would take me to Thailand for lasar sugery because it was cheaper there. lol I just need contacts, not some promise to go to some foreign country for risky surgery. Luckily I met a sd after that and have since ordered another year supply of contacts.

  149. ginaZ says:

    Retail therapy sounds nice! typically for me that is a trip down to my local Goodwill. Hopefully I will upgrade a bit soon.

  150. ginaZ says:

    Ah yes the dancing SB! You should find someone who helps you with your needs not just his own!

  151. ginaZ says:


    Yeah the other site was gross. One step away from… SA is a class act by comparison. The woman I saw was older not attractive, orange skin, fake boobs exposed, her hand down her g string plus she wanted 10K a month, thats pretty skewed if you ask me!
    For me, where I live (L.A) standard of living is high (my very basic apartment is 1400 a month)

  152. lisa says:

    Lisa the dancing sb, lol

  153. lisa says:

    I have no interest in dancing let alone lessons. So many other things that money could have went for but he wouldn’t budge, no allowance, just things that would be beneficial to what he wanted. I would have a 100 degree apartment but I could be dancing till I passed out, lol maybe I could dance for the landlord or the electric company, lol

  154. ginaZ says:

    Yes dance lessons won’t pay the bills, it might help keep your figure in check though. this older gentleman, should find a nice purple haired gal to dance with, and I do mean an older vixen 65+. He’s old enough to know better than chase after a girl young enough to be his grand daughter.

  155. lisa says:

    I cannot undertand the women on the other site posting those pics as all they are doing is giving themselves away for free, it won’t make legit sds contact them any more, they’ll just get perverts

  156. lisa says:

    I work in a supermarket (tiring sometimes but stressfree and great coworkers) and have a daughter that just turned 18. She will be the first generation of my family to go to college.

  157. lisa says:

    I’m poor too. I live in the ghetto, have no car, but i’m paying the rent and eating decent, much better than last year. :) Plus my last sd gave me over 1400 in a month so I was able to do some major retail therapy and give my bathroom a summer makeover. And i’ve got tons of expensive cosmetics now. :)

  158. lisa says:

    this guy wanted to spend 100 an hour on salsa and tango lessons for me. I don’t think I would be doing much dancing in my apartment if I don’t have the money to pay the ac bill, lol Dance lessons are not mutually beneficial to me, lol

  159. ginaZ says:

    I’m a 38 year old finishing up her B.A (surrounded by lots of 22 year olds) I’m also a single mom. fortunately I share custody so I do have free time, plus summer is out and no school.
    I live a bit on the edge (OK I’m considered poor by most standards) tried regular dating, looking for a pot mate, but somehow found myself a SB several years ago via Craigs list.
    so far I like this site compared to others that are poor versions, nude pix from the women and such. hopeful I will find a wonderful SD this summer!

  160. lisa says:

    yes he wanted to go fishing, lol

  161. vixen says:

    NYC SB- I completely understand now. Bye everyone!

  162. ginaZ says:

    Lisa said:

    ” Hugh offers fun and amuzement to his ladies though. I doubt they are with him for the dancing or fishing.”


  163. lisa says:

    ok I will take 5 years off my age on my profile, if not you will decide i’m 48 yikes

  164. lisa says:

    I agree that many young college women are busy with school, working, family, friends, boyfriend, etc. On the other hand there are women out there that may have more free time as they might own their own businesses or they might have a flexible schedule.

  165. NYC SB says:

    vixen- my comments were generally speaking :) I know how demanding some masters programs can be… i finished one 3 years ago while working full time… i barely had time to eat yet alone date

    ps. i have the same rule about my sd… if you are older than my dad its not happening…

  166. NC Gent says:

    GinaZ – you are right about age. I add 5 years to the woman’s stated age on their profile but I don’t sweat it. A few woman I have had dates with from SA have fessed up to their real age pretty quickly and it was usually about 3-5 years difference. No worries – my age is off 3 years in my profile too, but I quickly reveal my true age. Have a great weekend everyone!

  167. vixen says:

    NYC SB- I’m not sure if I necessarily agree that younger SB’s in college have more free time. I’m 23, completing my masters and I must admit I struggle at times to find time for anything sugar related. I think it just depends on where each SB is at in their respective lives. You can find a 20 year old living on her own, working, and attending school just to survive. The same way you find a 40 something with no job and all the time in the world. Mind you I do not believe this is the norm but many cases do exist. I would hope no young SB out there neglects her school work just to be available for her SD. I do agree though that relationships with much younger SBs do tend to be more physically motivated.

    Now as for a 70 year old SD..umm no thanks..I tend not to date anyone older than my actual father:)

  168. lisa says:

    Hugh offers fun and amuzement to his ladies though. I doubt they are with him for the dancing or fishing.

  169. lisa says:

    Nitemare is a blog member that comes out of nowhere giving us wise words of wisdom. I know he’s out there lurking somewhere. I’m usually able to send him signals and get him on the blog.
    The apartments insisting on cleaning the air ducts. I’m sorry I agreed to it now as it’s has taken my whole day off. I need to walk down and get something to eat but they won’t work in your apartment if you aren’t present and since they don’t have a key to mine, I have to be here

  170. ginaZ says:

    Lisa, Yes a bit skewed, out of touch. Unless you are Hugh Hef, you can get away with that times 3! I don’t know, it seems sad to me. whats, the nightmare ? The airduct thingy? or a PO SD?

  171. lisa says:

    Nitemare Nitemare channeling Nitemare!

  172. lisa says:

    The old man that wanted the live in didn’t sound like a pervert as I talked to him for 2 hours and he was a gentleman, I just think he was naive and didn’t realize how ridiculous he sounded. He didn’t want a woman who was after money but still he wanted a young woman. Most young women’s view of being a sugarbaby doesn’t involve being devoted to an old man with health issues and staying with that man for the next 10-15 years till he dies, which was basically what he was looking for. He had been married twice and was basically feeling sorry for himself for being alone

  173. lisa says:

    thanks ginaZ actually my ac was ok but they came into to clean the ducts, 4 hours ago and since we don’t actually have professionals here (they hire tenants that work for rent credits) it takes forever. He took off the grills then he took down my internal ac parts and took them outside so my ac is off,it’s hot in here and I can’t leave the apartment till he’s done. I want to walk down to schlotskys for a sandwich but it looks like it’s going to be along time as the ducts haven’t even been cleaned yet.

    my last sd did lie about his age by 12 years. He said he was 53 but when I met him I thought he looked older. He did tell me he was actually 65 and well that did bother me a little but he was a nice guy and very generous. We had a lot in common as far as views on world affairs. I didin’t get intimate with him till the 4th date and then he disapeard. He wasnt’ very good so I think there must be a time between 58 and 65 that men lose it. my lover is 58 and wonderful, so it must happen somewhere before 65, lol

  174. ginaZ says:

    NC Gent, I can see your point about a woman younger than what you may want in a life partner, perhaps that is why in this context I prefer a man “older” than myself, or someone i would definitely not see as partner. which isn’t to say I wouldn’t want a connection with SD, for me the ability to have a conversation more a companion, or friend to explore with, is relatively safe. I ‘m a closet romantic, but choose not to get swept up in that in the SD/SB relationship.

  175. ginaZ says:

    Thanks for the welcome NC! yes, 31 one would expect a bit more maturity, she sounds like
    a teenager. As for preferring women in a certain age range, don’t be surprised if some of the women who say they are 30 something are actually 40 something! I think it really depends on the woman (or man)

    Lisa the older man who wants to live with an 18 year old sounds like a perv and
    a dirty old man IMO. completely out of touch with reality. who knows he may be lying about his age, he may be in fact 75. It’s always a red flag to me when a man wants to be with someone any more than 20 years younger. It suggests major insecurity issues. maybe someone they can control sexually and otherwise. wow your AC, I hope it gets fixed soon, so your life can resume to some normalcy!

  176. lisa says:

    ok now he’s dancing with my ac unit or something I just wish he would the thing back, put the grills back on my ducts and leave. I will never have my ac ducts cleaned again.

  177. NC Gent says:

    NYC SB — I definitely agree with your point on a younger SB making it more focused on a physical relationship. I find myself more likely to become emotionally attached to an SB that is closer to my age, but I am not looking to change my situation. There seems to be a “sweet spot” on age difference for me. Old enough that we can have conversations but young enough that I won’t become attached. I also realize there are some pot. SBs in their early 20s that would fit that criteria.

  178. lisa says:

    someone please send me some food, i’m under house arrest lol

  179. lisa says:

    now the guys sitting on my porch with a mask on his face, staring at my ac unit thingy

  180. lisa says:

    well this one that I talked to wanted a live in sitatuation with someone as young as 18. I can’t see any young woman giving up being able to date someone her own age to live with an much older man that wasn’t interest in giving her money or material things, just letting her use his when she moved in with him. How many college girls want to spend their time dancing with some old geaser in bad health just for the companionship?

    Let me out of here, I dont’ think they are ever going to finish in my apartment, going on the 4th hour and still not done with the 4 ducts I have, now the ac is taken apart. It’s hot in here and i’m starving but can’t leave my apartment till they’re done. The guy keeps losing his tools

  181. NYC SB says:

    Cant really say I blame men in their 60’s wanting someone in their 20s… GENERALLY the younger SBs are thought to be in prime physical shape… another reason is that generally they have more free time (as some are in college) than someone who might have their own carreer in place… last the maturity level… if an SD is married and not looking to change his situation he may want someone just for the physical aspect of the relationship… just my two cents

  182. lisa says:

    I’m starving here. They repair guy has been here 3 hours cleaning my ducts. Now he has my ac taken apart completely for some reason and it’s hot in here. I just want to to get out of the house and get something to eat as I haven’t eaten today, I wish they would hurry and get done, i’m spending more whole day off stuck at home, urgh

  183. NC Gent says:

    Yes Gina – she is very naive but is actually 31…. I was a bit shocked by her maturity level. She acted like she was still a teenager. I tend to be attracted to potential SBs in their late 20s to their late 30s. I am recently 48. As far as my type, I go for slender, educated women that have both a girlie-girl and tomboy side. I have a wide range of looks I find attractive.

    I hear that from other SBs all the time — guys in their 60s wanting someone in their 20s…. seems a little odd to me but there are many varieties of sugar life out there.

    p.s. welcome to the blog Gina

  184. lisa says:

    I did the premium membership for one month and got tons or more views but no more emails (probably about 10 emails for the whole month and nothing that led to anything)

  185. lisa says:

    ginaZ I live in Houston tx so it’s a big city but not alot of paying sds, lotsa free members. And it seems that some guys say they live in my city when they actually don’t, they just come into town a few times a month.
    The little town that the sd contacted me from is Brownsville which is in the rio grande valley. I did not contact him back because I can’t travel and I think he has a meeting with someone from this blog so that’s off limits to me.

    speaking of old men looking for really young women, well I am in my early 40’s myself but was contacted by a man of 65 whole wasn’t really looking to be a sd,he was looking for a live in to share the last years of his life with. NOt looking to give an allowance but willing to help out occasionally by sharing everything he has (as in a live in situation). All he talked about was dancing and wanting a woman to take dance lessons and dance with him and all this romantic stuff, etc. I kept trying to get him into sd mode and then blocked me. He says he is looking for someone 18-45 so I was actually on the older side of his options but really what 18 year old is going to want to get involved with a 65 year old man who is so so looking that wants a live in situation,monogomany,etc, wants to live a regular life and also has medical issues, etc? I advised him to look on a regular website or to try to meeting a nice woman his age at church or at a senior function

  186. Hi everyone in the Sugar World,
    I have been away for a long time to Northen Spain walking blisters on my feet on the Camino de Santiago.
    Once you go sweet, you will repeat. Nice observation Stephan !
    Just as my georgeous friend Sweet Euro, allow me to dive into the sugar bowl again. Have been lurking for a few days in a wonderful fragrant Eucalyptus forest reading up the past few blogs. For the first time I have also spend some hours reading pages and pages of SB profiles. I can now major in geography as they come from all over the States. Lol.
    Found some astounding presentations. This one is definitely for Dorkey.
    Majored in Psych and Sexuology and has volunteerd as a practitioner for some three years. If I get the picture right is now twenty. Huh ?????
    So at 17 started out. Gormbliyme ! Problably handjiving or so male students with soft music in the background Marvin Gay : sexual healing.
    Life is like a comic strip to me and I could not resist sharing this.
    But now for the serious questions. How often update photos ?
    Your Profile works the same as any website text. You should constantly refresh content. Then you hold the attention of viewers past and present.
    How to find the time to browse profiles ? Well I just did, due to exceptional circumstances.
    How do you get good Karma ?
    Now this one I really like, so much behind it, that notion Karma.
    The Karma theory makes clear that, that we ourselves are responsible for the circumstances in which we find ourselves by our behaviour in the past.
    Yes, by all means respond to messages.
    Give advice to newbies.
    One good turn deserves another, it is the basis of creating your good Karma. If you do not respond to messages, it results in a backlash for yourself. Your Karma will now see to it that your messages sent to SDs will be vaporized in thin air, no response at all is your lot.
    You see, we do not live in a meaningless world. We create our own happiness and certainly in Sugarland.
    I have some astounding good Karma sugar news to share.
    Will come back to it later and reveal it in all its glory !
    KarmaHenri, a real sugar pilgrim

  187. ginaZ says:

    Lisa-wow you really have been persistent in your quest, and can understand depending on where you live that there may not be many PO SD. In my case I live in L.A so, there may very well be more options. Travel is a tricky thing, perhaps one may not be in the position to travel, or someone you are interested in prefers someone local. I’m glad you were able to find the one generous SD, but sadly it only lasted the month. Perhaps occasionally do the premium membership which jumps your profile up, and on update your pic every so often to garner interest. Best of luck in your pursuit.

    NCGent ah yes the situation, the gal you described sounds very naive and quite young. that’s the tricky thing as one wants someone 18-25 but they may be unrealistic. Also you were quite right in your graceful decline and the reality of: “many places to find a woman that wasn’t attracted to me and only wanted my money.” As for me my physical type can vary greatly and in the context of SA, SB, it really has more to do with a mans character. I also like smart men, and certainly generous doesn’t hurt, but I need to have a real connection. A life mate is a whole other dimension.

    As far as broadening ones prospects and search, I think one should be more flexible with race or age. For example someone who is 65 who is looking for girls between 18-23?
    Unless your Hugh Hefner, it aint gonna happen:)

  188. NC Gent says:

    Hi GinaZ — regarding particular type… I had lunch with a pot SB. During the course of lunch, she told me three times that I really wasn’t her type. So after hearing it three times, I asked what type she was seeking. She said she was looking for a laid back surfer dude type, big muscles, long hair and a carefree attitude. I told her that obviously wasn’t me, and just continued with a pleasant conversation and parted ways. On Tuesday I got a text from her inquiring when we were going to get together again. I told her that she told me I wasn’t her type, and that I wasn’t really interested in someone that wasn’t interested in me. She replied back that she really needed the financial support. I replied back that I really needed someone who genuinely was attracted to me, and that I knew many places to find a woman that wasn’t attracted to me and only wanted my money.

  189. lisa says:

    I have emailed every potential of interest in my area. Ive been on the site off and on for about a year and have met 4 people and another one from another place. Haven’t had a sugar date on here since september. Had my last sd arrangement end a couple weeks ago after a month, but it was a very nice arrangment and he was generous.
    I have receive 3 messages on here since I put my profile back up last week. One guy has been on here forever and has one pic of him in his underwear, delete one is a weirdo into deviant sex (a fellow blogger informed me that he had contacted her too and she’s talked to him) and the third one I think is one that one of the bloggers on here is meeting this weeked. I’m not sure but it’s a small town and I didn’t see any other members from there. I spent alot of my childhood in that town and it’s not exactly full of wealthy people, actually has one of the nation’s highest poverty rates. I’m a little concerned because the guy sent me a “line” that sounds fake, i’m wondering if he is just keeping his options open or if he sends that line to everyone. I will have to wait and see how things go on her date. Anyway the guy requires you travel to meet him and i can’t travel. So no good potentials as of yet

  190. ginaZ says:

    Lisa, don’t be afraid to email a PO SD. I have found this can help propel things forward.

  191. ginaZ says:

    On another note, any out of town gals coming to L.A to meet a PO SD, if you have any questions I will be happy to assist. (Karma points)

  192. lisa says:

    my inbox is empty :(

  193. ginaZ says:

    DC $20 for gas? ouch not so good. OK lighten things up. Lots of emails, calls hoping to ind one person, but curious if there are other gals that manage to balance more than one SD?

  194. lisa says:

    Hi DC wow if I had to cook for a sd, he’d leave immediatly, lol
    My lover had to cancel this morning as he’s tied up with work. It’s good though as they are here cleaning my ducts now, well they;ve been here forever and still not anywhere near done, I think the guy is taking his lunch break now. I will be glad when he’s done so I can go get somethign to eat, i’m starving.

  195. DC says:

    Not yet..hope to have a good story next week. We are going to meet twice a month. I will cook him dinner and need to wow him

    Had to tell the boorish pot SD that it’s a no go. Giving me $20 for gas did not impress me and I didn’t like him anyway. Amazing that someone with 50 mil would not be more generous.

    Okay boyfriend came over last night and I had 2 hours of sleep so going back to bed zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

  196. lisa says:

    any sugardates to report on? (trying to lighten up the blog this afternoon :) )

  197. ginaZ says:

    The individuals (couple) apparently tried to do this to other men. One of my PO SD said the same woman tried to lure him, but fortunately didn’t buy into it.

  198. ginaZ says:

    Thanks for the link Stephan, I will be sure to check it out. Yes with the internet (CL is a perfect example) there are some bad people that do bad things. The SB and the SD must be careful.

  199. stephan says:

    Hi ginaZ!

    Yes we’ve talked about the Stephen Dent case: http://www.seekingarrangement.com/blog/?p=207

    there’s always a few Really bad eggs.

  200. ginaZ says:

    Had anyone heard of the couple who did the bait and switch? The woman would meet the married man and try and blackmail him? Shameless, but they did get caught.

  201. ginaZ says:

    Vixen, yeah the gal must be clueless, to not be able to put into her own words. Not only is she misrepresenting herself its so not cool. I emailed staff at SA, but they didn’t do anything.

    Ihop? glad to know it must not have to always be swanky place. The dive bar makes sense for me, he’s not conservative, and neither am I:) And who knows…

  202. vixen says:

    Gina my first meeting with my current SD was at an ihop! It turned out to be an absolutely wonderful day so do what ever works for you :)

  203. lisa says:

    Nitemare or Nitemare, where are you, has someone stolen your profile??

  204. lisa says:

    I have heard of a men from Nigeria and other places making fake profiles pretending to be women and wanting money sent to them so that they can fly over to the Us to meet. I don’t know why anyone would be that stupid to actually fall for the scam when it’s exposed all over the place, there is even a warning on this site about it.

  205. vixen says:

    wow stealing profiles?? I did nott know people were that desperate or is their life so pathetic that they can’t construct enough sentences of their own to relate it in a profile

  206. ginaZ says:

    Anyone there?
    On another note, will meet my first SD PO tonight at a dive bar. Yes I know what you’re thing WTH? But, he’s a rocker with tats, so not your typical SD, but it so happens he lives within a 1 mile radius of me. I decided to be open to. Curious, are others flexible, must they be conservative, sporty, married, or white, or a certain income, or look?

  207. ginaZ says:

    Yes NYC SB. I was looking through SB profiles out of curiosity, and noticed one younger ‘applebottoms’ gal had literally taken verbatim another older more sophisticated SB. That’s just wrong IMO. But I wonder then how much a PO SD may stretch the truth (age/income), or in the case of SB’s I have spoken to SD’s who had been part (almost) of a scam. The profile of the SB made up, the mastermind a man in a far away land. Married men in particular could fall into that trap. So exercise caution from both sides I think:)

  208. lisa says:

    Good morning NYC SB :)

  209. lisa says:

    stealing profiles? how would someone get away with that if they lived in another state or city? I have seen profiles where it is obvious the person is in eastern europe or something because the English is just horrible and the wording makes no sense. Yuck they are cleaning my air ducts and my house now smells like dead animals

  210. NYC SB says:

    GinaZ – Something like that happens? SBs stealing profiles LOL
    terrible… and a short lived lie unless you can live up to the profile… same goes with using outdated pictures or someone elses pictures

  211. lisa says:


  212. ginaZ says:

    good mornin’

    jsmn, you sound…young and as an older SB, I hope yes, he is the real deal! But, Canada is far enough away, that you would want to exercise caution.

    1. PLease reveal something about your visit away, to a friend, give her/him details about your wearabouts. Call them upon arrival, have them call you, so your PO SD knows you’re looked after.

    2. Make sure the PO SD pays for your RT air, and hotel room (your own)

    3. Don’t drink on your first date no matter how tempted:)

    On a whole other note: Karma with SB’s. What happens when one SB steals your profile and makes it her own. It didn’t happen to me, but I noticed 2 profile. I also knew the one more sophisticated gal was the original. That irks me. I’m sure the PO will notice (or maybe not) the grammar issues in the subsequent emails) but still that’s not right.

  213. lisa says:

    Good morning everyone time to get out of bed

  214. gurlnextdoor says:

    Welcome to the blog PrideandPromise (wow, that reminds me of Jane Austen so much, but with a twist :) ). Glad to hear your sugar date went well, wish they all could be so great, lol.

    Jsmn give the guy a chance. He may be single for one of two reasons. 1) He’s extremely picky or 2) he’s too busy to have a tradtional relationship. Or then again he just might not want to get married, some people are just like that. But anyway, he hasn’t really done anything wrong so give him a chance. Oh and how do you explain leaving your house with a suitcase to your family? Tell them your going to go see a friend you made while away at college or something. That’s what I used to tell my parents when I’d venture off to some place with a suitcase in hand.

  215. jsmn says:

    I’ve been getting so many responses to the point where everyone sounds the same and I get tired of responding to anyone at all HOWEVER one particular guy is just way too good to be true – he’s in Canada, works in the medical field, attractive, polite…he hasn’t asked for “naughty” pics just to hold his interest, he’s single (kinda unheard of lol)…he’s just great.

    I’m excited to meet him and go to Canada (and legally drink alcohol for once haha NOT on the 1st date, I know 😀 ) but not really sure what safety measures to take…and I really don’t want my family to know about this – how do I explain leaving the house with a suitcase?

    Funny thing is – an awful lot of guys from Canada have been emailing me…hmmm did I miss something :))

  216. ginaZ says:

    How often should sugar babies update their photos?

    Depends… Your main one should be current, the other two maybe one to show your body, the other…as long as they still look like you. but I do think substituting one for the other is good. On another note, what to do when a potential SD asks for more pictures, but when you send them he still isn’t satisfied. “where are the body shots?” I wonder who are the pic collectors?

    How do you find the time to search for and connect with potential sugars?
    Right now everyday, as school is out and I’m on a quest. Talked to four PO SD’s
    One was definitely NOT a true SD. his reason for joining this site? “Lots of pretty women. his response to women who hint at spoiling, financial help? No way, I;m young, good looking why should I?”

    Karma? followup when you’ve started a dialog. What irritates me is when a SD ends me an email. I’d like to offer 5K plus shopping , call me, then when you do they don’t respond or email, or anything. I think they are the window shoppers that send 10 of theses messages and enjoy the game.


  217. lisa says:

    PrideandPromise welcome to the blog. Sounds like you had a great time. Too bad all arrangements can’t be as good. You have to go thru alot of duds to get the gems.

    Going to bed now.

    saw my ex boyfriend tonight. Shouldn’t have done that but now I know I dont’ want to get back with him. Have a good night everyone

  218. PrideandPromise says:

    O_O I’m new to this. Hehe. So…hi. =) I’ve been lurking this blog since I joined and I just now decided to write on it.

    I had my first ever Sugar Daddy arrangement on Tuesday. It was so much fun. He flew out from New York, took me to the Santa Monica Pier, Shopping, and paid for our beautiful hotel room. (It was a suite!) And at the end of it, he still gave me 300 dollars. I hope all arrangements could be this good!

    Anywho. I just wanted to tell SOMEONE. Haha.

    How often should sugar babies update their photos?

    Every other month? I only have one up and it’s about a month old. I figure the guy can ask me for my email and I will send him better pics, if he is really interested. =)

    How do you find the time to search for and connect with potential sugars?

    I have all the time in the world. Haha.

    How do you get good Sugar Karma? Responding to ALL messages? Giving advice to newbies?

    Be polite and sincere to everyone. ^_^

  219. gurlnextdoor says:

    Well ManWhore that’s funny you mention stumbling across something on the internet, that’s how he found out the last time lol. But I was honest with him and well the new guy he wouldn’t be able to find out about even if he wanted to really. :)

  220. NyaSockret says:

    Thanks for the advice JQ! I’ll make sure not to black out on the first date! lol

  221. ManWhore says:

    You NEVER know when that “person” will stumble on something, be it a friend of a friend or plain old suspicion/ curiosity – The internet is a small world these days.
    I know I would rather be told up front and it be MY decision if I’m down with it or not.

    But when in doubt
    Tell the truth…. Even when you’re lying ! lol

  222. johnq says:


    The advice will probably depend on your category. You could be anything from a wealthy SD looking for a hot coed SB to a male SB looking for an older gay SD. In theory, I suppose you could be both, though I suppose that’s unlikely.

    So: what are you, exactly, and what type of person are you looking for?

    NyaSockret: One thing I’ve discovered is that there really aren’t any rules for this kind of thing. I personally don’t see any reason why the SD should travel first. If you do travel, however, make sure he gets you a hotel room. You may not end up using it, but you need some place to retreat to if necessary. You should also make sure that someone else knows where you are, and you should have your own means of transportation, which means that you either need to have enough cash to take a taxi, or get a rental car. Incidentally, if he’s asking you to travel he should cover all of this. If he balks at the cost he’s probably not worth pursuing anyway. And above all be careful, since at this point he’s a total stranger. Don’t be alone with him until and unless you get a good sense you can trust him, and by all means don’t get drunk on the first date.


  223. NyaSockret says:

    Hello Sugars! I’m new and just discovered the blog. I’ve been looking at past blogs for tips and it seems that most think the SD should travel to see the SB first for safety reasons. Have any of you SBs traveled first?? If so how did you go about doing it safely? I’d love to hear any advice from SDs too! Sorry to post off topic.. I didn’t know where else to get advice. Thanks!

  224. Matt says:

    Hi. Can anyone give me advice? Background: 41 yrs. old ex-military..going to college and in great shape. Learned of this from a much younger student. Thought I’d try it out. Questions/Comments?Advice?

  225. johnq says:

    I would never advise lying to someone you’re in a relationship with, at least if you care about the relationship, since there’s a good possibility that you’ll kill it. However, if you’re going to lie by all means do it right.


  226. gurlnextdoor says:

    JohnQ I like your advise. :) I think your right, I should just lie to him completely.

  227. johnq says:

    My advice to gurlnextdoor: if you’re going to lie to him then lie to him. No half measures. If he asks, don’t tell him. Telling him at that point isn’t going to help your relationship any, since if he’s going to feel betrayed and emasculated that’s going to happen either way. And although you may be able to come up with some technicality whereby you aren’t actually deceiving him, I’d be really surprised if he buys it. Because, let’s face it, you are deceiving him, given that his understanding is apparently that the two of you are in a monogamous relationship.

    Don’t get me wrong: I’m not criticizing the dishonesty. That happens in relationships, and that’s between you and him. I am, however, criticizing the idea that you can wait until he asks the exact right question and then tell him and it will be OK if you just say it the right way. It won’t. So either tell him now or lie to him then.


  228. DorkyGuy says:

    lol @ the beast with two backs… that’s one way of seeing it

  229. Missy says:

    Opps “strong drink” – Think I’ve had too many

  230. Missy says:

    I think Sir Walter Scott did the tangled webs we weave …..

    Alcohol giveth the desire but taketh away the ability

  231. Missy says:

    How about the one about “making the beast with two backs” ???? Hah

  232. DorkyGuy says:

    “Nothing is so necessary for a young man as the society of clever women.” 😉

  233. lisa says:

    ok my ex wants to come over and is stopping at the atm on the way. I told him I am very tired. What should I do?? In a way I want him but in a way I despise him

  234. gurlnextdoor says:

    Perhaps Missy you are right but there are many factors that have played into my decision to pursue a SD. I’ve considered both the pros and cons of what I’ve chosen to do. In the end I’m happy with my decision. But I did enjoy the bit of Shakespeare. :)

  235. DorkyGuy says:

    A girl who quotes Shakespeare!

    That is such stuff as dreams are made on. My heart is ever at your service!

  236. lisa says:

    he just sent me an email “I miss you, can we make sweet love? I sent him an email “No”

  237. Missy says:

    “Oh what a tangled web we weave, When first we practice to deceive”
    It’ll always come back around gurl…

  238. lisa says:

    ok my ex is wanting to come see me. I told him I was very tired and asked him what he had in mind.

  239. lisa says:

    good evening gurlnextdoor

    out of the bath, clean and fresh
    long tiring day

  240. gurlnextdoor says:

    Welcome back lisa.

  241. gurlnextdoor says:

    Well I thought about it and I decided I’m not gonna tell him. I’m just gonna keep this as my little secret. :) Hmm, what if he came flat out and asked me? Well I don’t think he would since he did ask me when I had temporarily stopped my search and I told him 1) I didn’t have a SD anymore and 2) I wasn’t looking for one. Which wasn’t a lie…at the time. But if he were to ask me I’d be honest with him in the nicest way possible. I’d tell him that I had a mentor who was helping me out financially some, a benefactor of sorts.

  242. lisa says:

    Hi everyone
    Back from having some dinner with my daughter. Headed to the bath to wash off the sweat of the day.

  243. DC says:

    A girls gotta do…….

    You deserve to be spoiled by many Gurl! So you are just gonna keep it to yourself? What if he flat out asked you?

    I am usually too up front and I think I better not be too forthcoming with the guy I am seeing. It can’t be good for his ego but he is free to do what he wants as well at the moment.

  244. gurlnextdoor says:

    Yeah DC, well I didn’t start dating my boyfriend until after I had started my sugar search and well I never told him about it, but my big mouth friend did. He’s the I-only-want-to-take-care-of-you type and so I know for him the thought of having another guy spoil me would be devastating. Therefore I don’t tell him so as not to break his lil heart, but I am gonna enjoy getting spoiled again. :)

  245. DC says:

    Lisa- I love your sense of humor. Funeral…too funny.

    Gurl- you’ve probably been dating your boyfriend a while right? so it would be understandable that he wouldn’t be on board. I started to date this non sugar guy right after I started my search. Wans’t sure I liked him too much so I told him to see his reaction. Turns out he was sort of a sugar daddy about a year ago. he helped a young woman out, not really an allowance..but if he had a hard time with it he’d be a hippocrite. Plus he’s the type that doesn’t get jealous…just a really cool guy. Both of them are. I got lucky.

  246. lisa says:

    That’s great gurlnextdoor
    I’ve got be getting ready to meet my daugther at the busstop soon. It’s only a block down the street but this scorching heat is unbearable the minute you walk out the door and you’re soaked in sweat in minutes. We are going to go eat and then i’ll wait with her till her bus comes. Of course many of the bus shelters are gone for road widening. I look for alot of people to pass out from heat exhaustin this summer from standing at the bus stops. My dad who is elderly has to stand out by the busy street in the hot sun whenever he goes to the doctor. The bus he used to take was in a shaded place but the route was changed to not go to the medical center anymore because of the buses delaying traffic.

    Gotta go now, be back after 6.

  247. gurlnextdoor says:

    True lisa true, lol. Well my boyfriend did just pay for my phone bill and is sending me $250 to come see him this summer, so he’s doing a great job as a boyfriend. :) But at the same time, a lil spoiling on the side which he can’t give me due to his financial situation (I mean he’s a college student for crying out loud) is good too. 😉

  248. gurlnextdoor says:

    Yes lisa I agree. I mean I’m a young woman, and as much as I may like my SD and all (which I really do like my lover who seems to be morphing into a SD), there is probably a 5% chance that I would end up with him in the long run. And I’m glad he understands and respects that I do have a boyfriend who is the first priority in my life. Granted when we’re together, he’s number one, but in the grand scheme of things I know I won’t end up with him as a partner in life.

  249. lisa says:

    well if the boyfriends are jealous of the sds, they know what to do, act like a sd themselves.

  250. gurlnextdoor says:

    Aww DC that is such a sweet thing for him to say. If my SD said that I’d melt right then and there. :)

    I wish I could tell my boyfriend about my SD but I know he’d flip. He already got mad when I told him I used to be a SB, lol. But he’s come to terms with it, or so he says.

  251. lisa says:

    and I guess the reverse of that would be that one day the sb could be saying nice words at the sd’s funeral. lol well if the guy is much older and already married, that’s all that’s left, lol sorry the heat is making me speak morbid

  252. DC says:

    I told my SD that I was searching for a life partner and the guy I am dating knows about my SD. Both are cool with it. My new SD said something that showed me what a great guy he is. He said the best thing that could happen is that one day I dance at your wedding

    Hi Gurl..Hi Panther!

  253. lisa says:

    two important things knowing how to spoil and understand the nsa part. I think there are too many sds on the site that think a woman should see only them even though they might be married or have no intention of a long term thing.

    I just can’t stay out of the bathroom, lol everything looks so bright and cheery. I got rid of the peach and jade colors I’ve had in every bathroom i’ve had in the past 20+ years and now have lime, orange, and bright yellow. The last of the allowance from my last sd.

  254. gurlnextdoor says:

    Yep lisa, I’m happy and we’ll be seeing each other again this Sunday which I’m really looking forward to. :) He said he wants to help me in any way he can because he just likes me so much. He’s exactly what I would’ve asked for in a SD. He’s a great kisser, great listener, understands the situation between us, drama free, a gentleman, and he knows what it means to spoil me. Don’t think I could ask for more. :)

  255. gurlnextdoor says:

    Now to answer the questions. :)

    How often should sugar babies update their photos?
    I’d say once every few weeks or every 2 months at the most. Not necessarily all the pictures but definitely the main picture that shows up in searches.

    How do you find the time to search for and connect with potential sugars?
    When I was actively searching for a SD, I usually did my searching in the evening after I was done with everything. After I had talked to a potential through a few email exchanges and felt like there could possibly be some great chemistry between us, then I’d usually call them and talk to them whenever both our schedules allowed us to talk before meeting in person.

    How do you get good Sugar Karma? Responding to ALL messages? Giving advice to newbies?
    I think by being cordial to everyone you meet, even if they do turn out to be not worth your time. Not standing people up, leading people on, etc. That helps in my opinion and always trying to help newbies of course. :)

  256. lisa says:

    looks like it’s raining sds everywhere but here. Heck it’s not even raining rain in Texas. That’s great news gurlnextdoor :)

  257. gurlnextdoor says:

    Lol didn’t realise everyone was over here. Ok so I’ll repost what I wrote on the other page.

    Good evening everyone! :) Talked to my lover this afternoon and well I now know he is SD material. He told me to ask him for anything (money, gifts, etc) and if he could give it to me, he would. And first thing off my list is my car insurance which he has agreed to pay for along with some gas money and part of my airline ticket to go see my boyfriend this summer. Looks like I may just have a SD soon enough.

  258. lisa says:

    Hello from the blast furnace (aka Texas)

  259. Panther SD says:

    Hello all, just checking on everyone! 😉

  260. lisa says:

    well if my ex wants to get back together (nothing serious as I will only accept casual) I need to see some pampering. No word from him but of course he’s at work all day.

  261. DC says:

    Lisa- you at the very least deserve an SD who pays for your cabs. So sorry about the heat. That’s why I live in Seattle. I wouldn’t last a day in the south in the summer.

    Richard Gere looks better now with the salt and pepper hair than he did when younger. Anthony Bourdain..that’s another one. I wouldn’t mind if an SD who looked him him contacted me 😉

  262. lisa says:

    yes political views and religion should never be mentioned in the bedroom.

    I also hide my lifesize cardboard standup of George Bush in the closet when my lover comes over, lol as he’s a liberal.

  263. NYC SB says:

    Lisa – in the bedroom i dont talk to him about his political views LOL (THIS IS CLEARLY A JOKE)

    i think Richard Gere is so so handsome

  264. lisa says:

    I can’t stand richard gere. Not so much his looks but his political views. If a man has political views that offend me, it doesn’t matter what he looks like, I think he’s an ugly person and I want to smash his face in, and well I dont’ think that would make me a good sb, lol

  265. lisa says:

    yes sds that make millions that can’t afford to pay for the site. interesting

    I am a little concerned about the guy who contacted me from Brownsville. That is where Jasmine is headed this weekend to meet a sd from there. I haven’t seen but one sd listed in Brownsville as it’s not exactly a sd town, it’s one of the poorest cities in the US actually.

    My head is aching from being out in the sun. This heat is going to kill me. It would be nice to find a sd that could pay for me to take cabs instead of walking a block to one bus stop, standing in the sun, walking again, etc, etc. It’s like they are taking away all the bus shelters in my area.

    Still wating to here from my ex, lol Told he I needed some financial assistance, he asked how much and I sent him another email only saying I needed a few hundred, as I really don’t want him as a sd and I like him so It wouldn’t really be for the money but still i’m not dating a guy driving a mercedes while I walk without there is some compensation. lol I dont’ look to hear back from him, probably scared him away.

  266. DC says:

    NYCSB….P.S. so he looks like Richard Gere without the gray hair…..swoon….mine does a little as well.

  267. DC says:

    Hey NYCSB-

    Just read about your heavenly date…congrats! Hope all goes well.

    NYCSB just saved you some time you would have wasted on that guy Lisa. Good thing.

    Heard from my pot SD this morning and we are planning our next date. This is the one that was a little hesitant about my being with him for the money alone. I asked him at coffee if he would feel better if we had dinner first and he said maybe that would help but I think he’s ready to just go for it as I am. He’s so cute and nice.

    BTW there is another SD site (not where I met the above SD) that is so obviously a scam. I have been contacted by about 50 guys, none of whom are obviously real since their e-mail subjects all sound the same and none are members. None of these SDs can afford to pay? When I wink and say upgrade to contact me none of them do. It just makes me appreciate this site even more. There may be poof daddys here but I think the majority are legit. JMO.

  268. lisa says:

    Good afternoon everyone. Just got back from Target. About melted waiting for the bus. Going to meet my daughter when she gets off work today and go eat. I got one email in my box this morning but it concerns me as I think it’s the same guy that one of our fellow sbs is meeting this weekend. If Jasmine is out there lurking, please come on the blog.

    Got some nice bright bathrugs to go with the new towels I bought last week. Now my bathroom is looking bright and cheery.

  269. CrèmeBruléeNY says:

    NYCSB – Glad all went well for you baby doll.

  270. DC says:

    Morning Lisa and NYC!

    How often should sugar babies update their photos?

    ……..I think if someone’s photo is more than a year old it’s time to update

    How do you find the time to search for and connect with potential sugars?

    ….well the reason I wound up here is because I am unemployed so I have plenty of free time unfortunately. Plus it doesn’t take that long as at least lately, things appear to be dead, unlike 2 months ago. where are all the SDs? Jetting off to the south of France? LOL

    How do you get good Sugar Karma? Responding to ALL messages? Giving advice to newbies?

    ….I definitely respond to anyone who writes me. I get a lot of views but very few actual e-mails so it doesn’t take as long as someone who is inundated on a daily basis. Does this bring me good sugar karma? Who knows, I met my new SD at a non sugar site. It certainly hasn’t brought me immediate good karma at this site since most of the SDs I write to don’t bother to take a minute and say thanks but no thanks. But who knows how karma really works….

  271. NYC SB says:

    is everyone in sugar coma?

  272. NYC SB says:

    How often should sugar babies update their photos?
    I use a slightly outdated photos… if there is interest by the SD I email him more recent ones…

    How do you find the time to search for and connect with potential sugars?
    When there is a will there is a way… i work long hours but this is something that I want so I make the time to search… however, i do not meet with just anyone… pretty selective about who gets to meet me… there is no point of wasting time if i can see that i am not a match for a given SD

    How do you get good Sugar Karma? Responding to ALL messages? Giving advice to newbies?

    Good Sugar Karma – is there such thing? I try to do the right thing and help out with advice when I know what to say. I offered a fellow bloger and now my super awesome sugar baby friend to be her back up when she came up to NYC. In all honesty after meeting her my sugar luck has changed soooo much 😀

    I do not reply to all messages… i do read them all and look at the person’s profile but if there is no interest on my end why bother with a pointless email saying “No thanks”

  273. lisa says:

    Good morning everyone. Slept in this morning.

    well I can’t help but be a little suspicious of sds that have been on the site forever. Whereas sbs have alot of competition and even the youngest most gorgeous of them have to compete with thousands more, the number of sds is significantly less. Any legit sd should have no problem finding the right sb, it shouldn’t take years. I have seen sds on this site that were on when I first joined and everytime I have changed my profile I have received the same message from them and never heard back again from them.

    I don’t update my photos as much as i’d like because I don’t have a camera but my pics are within the last few months.
    I find plenty of time to make contact but meeting time is limited of course.

    I do respond to most messages but if they send me a one liner or say something crude, I delete them.