10 years ago

10 years ago

Many here have said that their arrangements benefit from a lil’ sugarcoating… to keep some feelings or personal opinions private for the sake of creating and maintaining an ideal, mutually beneficial arrangement…


by Happy Lurker

“When my SB says she is made of truth
I don’t believe her, for she lies
That she might think me some untutored blogger
Unlearned in Sugar World’s false fantasies
Thus vainly thinking she is not after money or gifts
Of which she knows I am very generous with
Simply I smile for her false speaking tongue
On her side is simple truth suppressed.
But wherefore says she not she is unjust?
And wherefore say not I that I am too old to be conned?
Oh, that sugar best habit is in seeming trust
And SBs in sugarland love not to have truth told.
Therefore I lie with her and she lies to me,
And in our faults by lies we flattered be.”

Honey Baby:That’s what I think is great about a sugar arrangement. Its almost a performance. I’m not saying it is staged, but its fun to be given the oppurtunity to shine in the spotlight, knowing you are a successful man’s arm candy, and that he is showing you off to the world. You can be anyone you want to be. You can still be yourself, but you can play like a pussycat doll, act like an actress, dance like a stripper, bang like a pornstar. Why? Because you’re “acting”, you’re “sugar-coating”, you’re “putting on a show”. Not because you’re “lying”, but because you are stepping out of the lines, and doodling all over the page and just getting messy with life. In a sugar arrangement, this is what both parties expect the most. To have a wonderful time without risks of arguing while together.”

Would you withhold certain info in a sugar-arrangement that you’d otherwise be honest & upfront about in a ‘traditional’ relationship?

Are sugars expected to be as forthcoming about their personal feelings as those in traditional relationships?

Is ‘lie’ too strong a word for simple sugar-sweetness?

Leave a Reply

938 Responses to “SugarCoating”

  1. tera says:

    One of the great thing about having a sd/sb relationship is that you feel like you are floating because of all the lifted pressure from a traditional relationship. The expectation of having a good time every moment together have been ingrained since the beginning of the relationship and since you have so little time together. The time together is more precious. It’s a self fulfilling prophecy, both party know and expect to have a good time and therefore they do. It’s like the feeling of going out on the first date every time. I am still myself but I put a little more efforts in looking nice by dressing up and spending a little more time doing my hair etc because I’m excited and am look forward to spending time with my date. We don’t have the kind of beckering that dull out traditional relationship. My sweetness, kindness, and attentiveness can shine. This is not a lie,all these characteristics are me and have been there all along.

  2. Male_Sugar_Baby says:

    Hi folks,

    I know that MOST sugar babies are FEMALE — and that frustrates me: not because there is anything wrong with female sugar babies, but because it means that people do not recognize me as a real sugar baby.

    The TRUTH is that sugar babies can be MALE or FEMALE. Do you suppose that we could talk about SUGAR PARENTS (i.e. SUGAR MOMMY or SUGAR DADDY)?

    I really need a SUGAR MOMMY that can spoil me, love me, and take care of me; money is not the ONLY thing in a relationship, but it certainly is one factor.

    How does one find a SUGAR MOMMY? Are there any groups or forums about how to find a SUGAR MOMMA? I really need help, folks.

    — Male_Sugar_Baby

  3. texaSD says:


  4. Margo says:

    Here is another story.
    I had a nice lunch with a lawyer. I made it very clear in my emails, that I was interested in an arrangement. Then he invited me for dinner to a restaurant of my choice. I picked a classy upscale restaurant. He said that was a lovely place and a great idea. I sent him an email that I was looking forward for the dinner and even bought a special dress for that. But his reply made me shocked:
    “Please do not wear panties under the dress. I want to see that nice ass of yours through the dress.”
    And then:
    “I will bring a nice bottle of Shiraz and we can go back to your apartment.”

    I am not his lover! He can take me to nice places and talk, but if he wants to make the relationship more intimate, he should discuss the arrangement first.

  5. SF SD says:

    Kathy L — A lot of people may have missed your post when the topic changed. Take a few minutes to peruse a few of the previous blogs. Then jump ahead to most recent one and ask away.

  6. Jess says:

    Well he cancelled again and is wanting to reschedule. I sent him the no “frilly” email and also clarified that I was not interested in a “sex-only” relationship. I haven’t gotten a response back yet….:(

  7. Kathy L says:

    RealisticSD… I can understand that point of view. Thanks for chiming in :)

  8. now how did this just jump from 9:30’ish to 8:21??
    Oc I am glad you said something because I thought a Pot had you rattled heheh I was here for ya girl!!
    lots of the Newbies may not get the Art yet.. I know I am kinda dreading the “talk” when it comes my way but still Iam looking forward to it!

  9. RealisticSD says:

    As I said, I am in my mid-late thirties and I happen to meet SBs in the 18-23 age range not because I particularly want to but because it just happens that way. However, in many ways I would prefer a somewhat older woman (late 20s / early 30s) who has experienced more of the responsibilities of life and who will therefore appreciate this type of relationship better.

  10. Kathy L says:

    hello ladies & gents! I’m new to the sugar world! I’ve had a few emails… some obviously fake some seem genuine. I’ve been on 1 meeting so far… was a bit lacking. there are 3 pot SD now that I must say are VERY attractive… if it’s their real picture. 1 is far away & 2 are relatively close. The weird thing is they are all close to my age, I thought someone my age would be interested in the young ones (18 – 25). I’m 30. Especially seeing I’m not thin or athletic anymore. One of my goals from doing this is to be able to modify my body to be more of what it was 3 years ago (3 years of working 2 full time jobs to barely get by and not working out caused me to go from an athletic 128lbs to a fluffy 140). So it’s time to invest in me now. I’m still working full time at my main job & am interviewing for my 2nd full time job. If I can find the right arrangement, I won’t have to work another job, my 1st job will be enough (with the arrangement) to get by… maybe if things work out better than planned I can modify some of the wrongs that I’ve created with my body. So…. here’s to hoping! IF any of you SB or SD have any words of wisdom… I’m all ears!

  11. Happy Lurker says:

    Had a lovely week-end and found over 900 comments.
    Takes me over and hour to read up many interesting viewpoints.
    NFGent, yes off couse ! I got the spelling wrong, it is eu and not en.
    Need to proofread better. I’ll ask my eye doctor, if I need a pair of reading glasses from now on.
    Great word by the way that cyanobacterium !
    Made me think of the Cyrano.
    In Germany the Bier Fest has started.
    Hope to go there for a draught, it is all beer and boops !

  12. Lisa Marie says:

    LOL Yeah Kat, I have a little headache too. It was a crappy weekend. Kinda sucks too. It was my birthday. Ugh.

    Realistic SD
    I kinda prefer the relax SDs they seem more down to earth and easier to talk to. All the time dress up can be a little itimidating when I cant afford all those luxuries myself. I am a woman so of course bieng spoiled is nice. But I personally am a tshirt and blue jeans kinda girl. I LOVE to dress up and look sexy. I dress up for work. But I love to be comfortable as well. I even mix up the “cute, sassy, comfortable look” with a nice dress and some comfortable shoes sometimes. So why wouldnt the wealthy people enjoy the same? So I understand the view on that. A lot of the pictures displayed on here can be rich and flashy or casual and comfortable to point out they are realy people too. Such as hiking and fishing or just relaxing at home with the family pet. Thats being real to me.
    SO in other words, you just have to get to know the SD to see if they are “real” or not.

  13. I can go get the book I think I have this high lighted . just let ol’ kit kat know love to help out a friend

  14. RealisticSD says:

    The clothing bit is hard to go by. I prefer t-shirts, jeans and sneakers whenever I can get away with them, so if I meet someone casually for the first time, the girl won’t see me flaunting much wealth. In fact, I don’t flaunt my wealth at all, even though I do make a comfotable 7-figure income. I also know multi-millionaires who wear the $10 rubber watches you can get from Wal-Mart. All depends on one’s priorities in life.

  15. OC It depends the book says .. no no the blog negotiating With a sugar daddy says to deflect it until you feel chemestry, or something of the sort! would you like me to quote directly from the book? I can go get it sis??

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      RealisticSD: See, I don’t always blow hot air. Some things I may actually have a pretty good feel for 😉

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      Kit-Kat: I was just getting the feeling that many were talking about money in initial emails. Which kind of made me wonder… “How can you negotiate with someone you have NEVER met” That to me falls far too close to the dark side of the sugar rainbow. Everyone has their communication style. I will say that I have never and will never talk about or negotiate prior to even meeting. Even then, I may take a few more meetings or conversations to have that happen.

  16. I got a headache or something!!

  17. Lisa Marie says:

    yellowbird…all I can say is be yourself. Make sure you have a total agreement on you arrangement that you both agree on. when you meet make it a public place. its a lot like a blind date, of course you want some kind of chemistry or you wont click and it wont last.
    most of us are new to it. I have had a few intresting emails myself. Just do your homework and protect yourself first.

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      Just a quick question… Do all of you ladies talk about $ prior to even meeting the gentleman?

      • OCSugarbaby says:

        Yellowbird: It is dating but with $ugar. If you are unfamiliar with internet dating you might want to take things slow and communicate via email with them to gain a comfort level prior to meeting. Once you meet you can then see if there is the right chemistry to consider proceeding to an arrangement. communication, communication, communication… take your time

  18. Yellowbird says:

    I am very new, just got here yesterday, have a contact he is looking for a SD arrangement if interested, what should i do, what will i said…i have not done anything like this before…i am worry!
    Anyone there pls help me!

  19. Lisa Marie says:

    jez took you long enough Kat. haha

  20. Lisa Marie says:

    wow, ha ha I come in here and I feel like everyone disappears!

  21. Lisa Marie says:

    Morning Sugars. How was your weekends?

  22. Realistic sd
    again comments like that tend to turn off my censor, and I say just what I mean!
    I cant see any respectable man trying to Sabotage his life chasing after a 17 year old. anybody can see you are very intelligent which means you probabaly can make a few good desicions.
    and Ggb that comment was just uncalled for!

    talk to you guys later !

  23. Lannie Well said!!
    Photo I dont know when, I have a kickbutt toothache, them Wisdoms acting up!
    and of course you guys I will tell ya when we meet and all

  24. Lannie says:

    LONE GUNMAN STATES: “would be an interesting thing to have the SBs on the blog recap their view on how they determine who is a REAL SD beyond what’s been written previously in this topic.”

    There is good advice in the article on this site yet I find myself actually looking the pictures available and immediately rule out those whose pictures actually give no clue to who a SD is. I also pay attention to the clothes they are wearing and I remember the first day looking at an attractive SD who claims to be wealthy yet the picture showed a full length view of a guy in department store clothing and scuffed shoes. Few SD’s that can afford to have a SB seldom wear a watch that cost under $100 bucks so my rule of thumb is if they are wearing a timex I should question their ability to live up to their profile.

    I also look for key words in the profile. In my experience which has only been 1 SD (laughing, some experience) I learned what a quality SD actually is. Right from the first contact there were clues, as on the first meeting it was just that almost like a job interview simply getting to know each other. Communication that followed after the initial meeting changed to learning more about each other which developed into an arrangement. I feel that some SB’s put too much out there in their initial photo on their portfolio and it often appears that someone is selling sex instead of looking for a mutually beneficial relationship. Finding a quality SD often takes time and it involves rejection but most of all it involves doing more than putting your profile out there.

    Through these discussions you can show your personality and your ability to be confidential, to be a wild cat and a pussycat at the same time. The SD’s that post you can see alot of their personality in their post and often be able to recognize a chemistry through the post on a personal level. I am noticing that the SD’s who post occassional or quite often on the discussion are very sincere about their role as an SD.

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      Lannie: You may have hit on some facet of the truth with the clothing and watch comment. Custom tailoring, Italian made custom shoes, expensive watches and driving their 250K Mercedes Sugar Daddies do exist. However many do not go for that particular look. Some just don’t spend that much time on picking out the right clothes. Some may even need a little help from their Sugar Babies to take “them” shopping. Maybe they were never that good at picking out clothes that look good on them. Not all Sugar Daddies have to dress the part in their day-to-day existence. Some are very casual Daddies. So do not look away just because he wears department store clothes or attire that is more casual. Daddies come in all shapes and sizes as do Sugar Babies.

  25. RealisticSD says:

    “GGB says: RealisticSD~ So your in your mid/late 30s, and the girls you are meeting are more than half your age? so 18 and younger? Is being with someone under 18 illegal? I think that’s a little wrong!”

    Well, 17 x 2 = 34, which is early-mid 30s. 18 x 2 =36. “More than half my age” therefore is bound to be >18. Anyways, a 20 year old is pretty much half my age as well. It’s not that I am particularly looking for women in the 18-23 year old group, it’s just that most of the women I meet seem to be in that age group. Perhaps that’s the age group that needs a sugar daddy the most.

  26. The Lone Gunman says:

    Good morning! Did everyone have a Sugar-filled weekend?

    RainyStreet brings up something I frequently see lamented here on this Blog–“Where are all the real Sugar Daddy’s on here?”

    While there’s an excellent past Blog topic on weeding out SD wannabe’s and flakes, it would be an interesting thing to have the SBs on the blog recap their view on how they determine who is a REAL SD beyond what’s been written previously in this topic.


  27. photogirl says:

    Kit Kat – I am here… crashed early last night. Be sure to fill us in on how the breakfast date went!

  28. RainyStreet says:

    Anyone still on at 1 AM pacific time?

  29. RainyStreet says:

    Thank you for shining a light on the “photo collectors” I think I may have one of those…but maybe not….seriously where are all the real sugar daddy’s everyone speaks of on here? It’s getting harder to recognize the real ones.

  30. RainyStreet says:

    Give me another chance and I will try to make it right!

  31. SugaCaneBby says:

    This could be the sudden sinus headache I have going on, but I’m so dejected right now. It just occured to me that while I’m searching, I should hide my profile until I’m sure it’s as I want it to be viewed. Upgraded members can see me if I look at them (I know I’d check!) and I don’t like burning my bridges with careless flames. However, if they STILL decide that I suck even after I stick my neck out there, oh well. I understand I’m not gonna be everyone’s cup of tea, but I’d much rather them at least give me a “Thanks, but no thanks.” Guess my views have changed a bit on that since a few blogs ago. 😀 I just feel like people are dismissing me without giving me a chance and that’s no fun.

    You guys and gals on the coasts have such a varied pool to choose from. Lucky, lucky. Anyway, gotta be up at 8 for a shift at 10 (damn this commute! if there’s one thing I want out of an arrangement more than anything, it’s a car! It doesn’t have to be anything fancy, just get good mileage and be in tip top shape). G’night all. :)

  32. Lannie says:

    Thank You for the compliment, as I am new to this site and the boards I am just being honest in my post and trying to sort out how to communicate to others.


  33. AtlNicole says:

    Anybody on here tonight? Talking to my first pots, after much weeding through garbage. Hoping for the best.

  34. ok photogirl where you at??

  35. yes I been e-mailing so in a few I will hear of his Schedule. I might make it starbucks, Shoneys freakes me out sometime! and yes in the morning!! I dont do that in the Dark meeting people stuff!
    geez what if I dont like him it will seem Shallow if I say I am not intrested after all this mailing back and fourth mess.

  36. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Well good night Sugars, I will have to get all the news tomorrow!
    Talk to you all soon!

  37. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Kit Kat ~ OC is right we need to know? I love sugar news!

  38. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    WOW OC~ you are beautiful Girl! love your profile ,,,, no wonder you get tones of mail!

  39. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    OC~ oh let me look if I have mail!

  40. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Bonne nuit L’amant Imaginaire, Fait de beaux reves… Au plaisir de te reparler bientot!

  41. SF SD says:

    > L’amant Imaginaire – “I always have this innate fear that I’ll become monotonous eventually. Sometime I think having wisdom or some illusion that you do in my case is more entertaining than beguiling to older men.”

    My view is that men and women of any age have a great deal to learn from each other. Though they seem to enforce age-old stereotypes, arrangements can sometimes be a place where this happens.

    I won’t attempt to sort out the differences between entertainment and beguilement, but I can say that a couple of years ago I saw a 70-year-old Vanessa Redgrave hold a Broadway audience spellbound.

    G’nite again. And for real this time.

  42. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Alright ladies and lurkers to bed I finally go. I put my pillow on the opposite side and have my radio playing my night time music. I always fall to sleep to a film or music and since I’ve had a marathon of films going while I’ve been blogging and working I’m ready for some nice smooth jazz. I only recently got into jazz music as I have had to for research and what not for my project.

    Bonne nuit et faites de beaux rêves Sugar land

    xx LI xx

  43. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    OC~ now i’m curious what you look like? You must be a beautiful blonde in the OC!

  44. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    OC~ hummm i was never a brunette, well not for a long time…. i don’t have any brunette photos here…. hummm Always a Blonde!

  45. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    OC~ you’ve seen my photo?

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      I have seen your profile silly! Back in the day when we posted our profile #’s… Are you still a brunette or back to blonde?

  46. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    OC: I’ll have to try that.

    Oooh I know that Mr. OC isn’t your husband, but wouldn’t that be weird if a husband was an SD and his wife was an SB and neither of them knew it. Haha, maybe he’d read her profile and fall in love with her alter ego!!! NOW there is a story.

  47. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    OC~ lol I didn’t think about it that way, just that he’s from the OC lmao
    no I’m not pursuing OCs husband lmao
    OK from now on he’s Mr Cali lmao

  48. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    L’amant Imaginaire~ yes that is in Montreal! oh so your 6 hours from me and 9 hours from ginaZ
    OC~ don’t I know it!, here I’m too old, too close, too tall, oh I was told that I was too fat!!! Not, and the best of them all ,,,, I was told That I looked like a DRAG QUEEN!!!!!!
    Hope Mr OC will work out for me then I can visit Cali and Stay here !!! YAY

  49. ginaZ says:

    L’amant Imaginaire you’ve got mail!

  50. I mean to clairfy it the moring not tomorrow!

  51. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    It’s about 3:30 in Paris……. way past my bedtime but I’m usually up this late anyways working. I’m my own boss so I can sleep in when I need to as my meetings start at 10:30, 11:00 anyways so I just make up for the loss of sleep then.

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      LI: Try sleeping with your head at the other end of the bed for the night. It always works for me when I can’t sleep. 😉

  52. well ladies as it is sunday he is Bowling right now, but his last e-mail he mentioned shoneys, in the morning. and the photo thing I dunno I asked for it a few times and *bluntly* either hes not attractive /or he just dosent take photos, I do not know Really but he says he hasnt any photos on the net! yes he has a bit of some humour, he e-mails*returns* rather quickly and the rest is I dont know! his occupation is construction.

    he is not a experinced sugar daddy*or hes not admitting to it.
    I am not worried but What if hes an offical of some sort, I would be a little hesitant to persue that,
    my concern with him is well hes a guy I dont think very talkiative, so I dont wanna just sit there Drinking Soda*yall know how I get* and be carrying the convo!
    gemi Oc I would be good to Feel out this first meeting ? maybe let him bring up the Arrangment thing??
    oh note that I have told him that is what I am looking for but Iam a little Bashful IRL *tiny bit*
    he has not brought up sex only the Quote how much is this purse gonna cost me* comments and advice Welcome!!

  53. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Sweety SB: I have a friend who went to McGill University there I just remembered isn’t that in Montreal? I’d love to have a visit, I hear it’s quite lovely there. Wine country is great, I know nothing about wine so I just bring along a mate or someone who does. I don’t drink that much to be honest.

    Lisa: Silly girl, I won’t comment on who and who I don’t have prejudices against and money is more than welcome here in Paris from anyone in any country.

    As far as the aging and Benjamin Button things go, I always have this innate fear that I’ll become monotonous eventually. Sometime I think having wisdom or some illusion that you do in my case is more entertaining than beguiling to older men. It’s like dressing your kid brother in a tie and suit; it’s adorable because he’s young in this grown up outfit, but when he gets older the suit actually isn’t as cute anymore, it’s expected, so there fore I could say I lose my appeal and then it’s over………… This is just my personal take on this it’s not meant to offend or allude to any certain person, I just have an opinion.

  54. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    ginaZ add 8 hours i think

  55. ginaZ says:

    L’amant Imaginaire what time is it over there?

    6:20 PST over in Cali

  56. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    L’amant Imaginaire I’m from Montreal my friend! Yes, all of France is so romantic! I would love to bike ride in the country there, it would be breath taking! Especially the wine country, I saw some photos of Champagne , Bordeaux, bourgogne ( not sure how to write this one lol) and cote du Rhone! Wish I had an SD that would take me there!
    If you are ever in Montreal let me know, i’ll show you around!

    OC~We do have some choices, but it’s harder for the older ones. It seems the SDs sometimes don’t want to give us a chance, even if we are FAB!

  57. lisa says:

    “Oh yes, Paris is lovely. Lots of Americans around though. ”

    What do you have against Americans? I have visited Paris twice and my money seemed to be just as welcome.

  58. ginaZ says:

    I may be getting younger as I get older kind a reverse osmosis or (not that I’ve seen the film) Benjamin Button, phenomena. I was a VERY precocious girl lost in imagination, and still am, though more pragmatic with age.

  59. ginaZ says:

    OCSB, though haven’t you found many SD’s 40-50’s and 60’s still prefer SB’s who are 20 or so. even 18. Gets a bit smarmy and incestuous though. I remember being 20 and I briefly dated a man who was 40 or so, he broke it off with me because it made him feel old, the, “Is that your daughter?” questions freaked him out as well.

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      GinaZ: The ones who prefer SB’s in their 20’s will search out just that. I love when I look my “who’s viewed you” and I see in their profile that they are looking for 18-21 age group. BUT they couldn’t help playing a little peek’y peek’y at OC’s profile! 😉
      I have to say that I have spoken to and met some of the most genuine SD’s in the past few weeks. They are out there ladies. Sweet, handsome and very genuine. Some were new to this and some weren’t. Just as we are all unique, so are they. None of them asked for additional pictures, or even IM’d before meeting. We exchanged emails for a week or sometimes even two, spoke on the phone and then set up our plans to meet. Needless to say OC has some serious thinking to do. But then again, what’s the rush, when it’s right I will know it. Plus, I am having far too much fun in my sugar search!

  60. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Sweety Sb: Oh yes, Paris is lovely. Lots of Americans around though. I think the smaller villages and cites around Paris are equally as romantic. I like the country side because I like to bike ride around and haven’t got my SD to hop on a bike yet but perhaps we will soon!!!!!! You must visit though. I’ve never been to Canada. I know a guy who is from there though. Montreal and Quebec is where French is spoken so I take it you are from there? F1? Haha, I’m not into it myself though. Yeah it’s very very cheesy film though. I watched Dirty Dancing before that as I will forever love Patrick Swayze. His dancing and acting in that film were amazing and I like the innocence of the film. It had such a simple and sweet story. One of my favourite American films.

    GinaZ: Yo!!!! LOL Well, I sometimes forget that I’m young. A complex I’ve had ever since I was a child and watched cult cinema on my own. I wanted so badly to relate to the films I saw and the books I read versus playing with dolls and talking to kids my own age.

  61. SF SD says:

    Yo, ginaZ! – “SFSD wonder if we’ve crossed paths? I’m in SoCal but frequent S.F, my ole’ stompin’ ground.”

    It’s possible. SF is a small town in many ways. Not likely it was on SA, though, since I haven’t been searching since April.

    L’amant Imaginaire – “Girls in pearls baking brownies? Is this going to be stoner episode of desperate housewives?”

    Um, actually it was something closer to what NYC SB described. :-)

    L’amant – “I have to say I never like to think of ‘arrangements’ as arrangements. I just figured it was a catalyst; a way to meet someone very special who would become a part of my life that I would have never met other wise.

    Funny, my latest SB said something similar. Something about forgetting the web and just thinking about two people who happened to cross paths and turned out to be right for each other.

    So much going on, but I have to call it a day. G’nite, sugars!

  62. ginaZ says:

    I I

    Peeked in. KitKAT Ha! You are always fizzing girl. L’amant Imaginaire a 65 year old man reincarnated, well that is a very interesting. Me: old soul, though rather frisky so still young in many respects, though old enough to be one of the SA den mothers 😉

  63. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    L’amant Imaginaire~ J’aimerais tellement visite la France! but…If I had an SD I totally would! not that you’d understand my french, i’m from Canada! :)
    Love F1… wish I had an SD that did too
    We know you didn’t mean literally!
    Oh that is a funny movie…

    Kit-Kat When are you meeting him? you don’t know what he looks like? I would ask for a photo!

  64. 33 going on 30 here maybe 29!!

  65. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Sweety SB: Toulouse actually is where I’m from. Frequent Paris though……….

    I didn’t mean any comments about being older and wiser literally anyone, and I know you all know that but just wanted to clarify. I’d never say anything intentionally rude about anyone. Maybe on accident but that’s the danger of typing fast and being up late.

    I’m trying to fall asleep watching cheesy 80s films. I’m on Mannequin with that lady from Sex and the City. I remember this film when I was little.

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      Sweetie SB: The way I see it is that the SB’s in their 30’s have extraordinary options. We love SD’s in their 40’s and 50’s! However we are just like the men in their 30’s, we rarely like the same age group for sugar dating. Funny how that works. I remember being 19 thinking 30 was ancient.

      Kit-Kat: I love a man with a humorous side! When are you meeting him?

      LI: That is a very good movie!

  66. ok lemme stop Gushin!! hey what say you all I have a pot*mr kingpin* he wants to meet at shoneys! ahh I have a name*first name* no photo and not much else to go on, I have been talking to him for a couple of days and he now seemes like he*as* I told you guys hes kicking around a number or Something in his head, as far as the arrangement goes

    I am kinda Excited, kinda nervous. and he is beggining to show he has a sense of humor, picking at me for liking NASCAR. I Reminded him He is a Bowler I havent ever seen a Chocolatedaddy-bowler! lol

  67. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    L’amant Imaginaire~ es-tu a Paris? i’m french so…. not from Paris!

  68. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    OC ~ I hear ya girl! Sweety SB is 37 and Fab as well 😉

  69. a hem I do have a “r” key my fingers keep seeming to miss it sorry!! thanks for the understanding!!

  70. OC she is Right I tend to say just What I am thinking, Youguys know I forget myself at times.
    any you and Gemi, Even when Highly irritated*remember Vixenthreat* you still keep it above board, try to keep the peace and things like that!
    I agree a real thinker indeed always a kind word EVEN when the words should be Frank!
    and NYC that lady need to Write herself a how to book and Ill buy it too!
    she is much more Reserved but if you ask she is no bs and to the point !
    I mean who cant love you guys ??
    I keep telling yall we need to get together some kinda way and do something I am honered to have you guys as At the Very least pen pals
    that goes for Suga ash marie gina photo sweet red and dani

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      I knew what she meant. Thanks for the nice words Kit. I love the age I am at and wouldn’t trade places with anyone in their 20’s. I will say it loud and proud, OC is 37 and Fabulous! 😉

  71. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    OC: Well I didn’t mean age wise……….. I meant mentally older :)
    And there is NO WAY a surfer guy would find me as cool as you, trust me. I think I’m a 65 year old man reincarnated sometimes.

    Kit Kat: I just do a lot of crossword puzzles and read way way too many books. Though I did go to an ivy league school in America, but I supposed I minored in being a cultured snob so that could help LOL

    Mr. Buttocks? Ah yes, I saw him, haha. Come on guys perhaps he’s just a Michelangelo fan!!!!

  72. L’amant we having church in here tonight!! you tell it, and I like you Sarcasam, like I said before Euopeans have Diffrent rose colored glasses on and I find it VERY VERY intresting to hear you views they are Zingy.. Zesty.. ahh you see Where Iam going right? but always Very Eloquently Worded and always To me seem to be spoken by some one beyond her years.
    in response to the Frilly discussion I think Mr buttocks may need one he looking mighty Cold on the page!!

  73. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Bonjour again ladies and gents.
    I can’t sleep so I’m up late getting a head start on photo shoot planning
    for my latest art project.

    i have to say I never like to think of “arrangements” as arrangements. It’s not a matter of a feeling that I need to justify it and label something else to be okay with the concept. When I signed up after seeing the site, I just figured it was a catalyst; a way to meet someone very special who would become a part of my life that I would have never met other wise. I figure you meet creepy and flakey men in real life that at least on the net you get to screen them without having to deal with them in person. I get Kit Kat’s different categorisations of the SD’s, but really I forget my SD is actually an SD and I’d hope it’s mutual for him as well, but he’s really my best friend who I just happened to meet on this site. It’s not a romance persay, but if you haven’t figured it out I am a bit different and I’m okay with that label, and it’s hard for me to connect to people on more than one level especially in a relationship and I feel that if you take away the categorisations and just look for someone that you can have a special connection with even after the arrangement is over. Sometimes the arrangement we see ourselves having in our head isn’t the one that we actually end up having. I might be rambling but I just wanted to say don’t label anything……… just go with it and have YOUR own unique experience. Be detailed in what you are looking for both in your profile and in your messages. Everyone deserves the chance to have a great relationship and hopefully my smarmy comments make the journey a little more fun……… because I know that much older and wiser people such as OC Sugar baby…the Socrates of this site and NYC SB offer more practical wisdom that has helped me and others as I’ve lurked on this blog for ages.

  74. comon that man is not messing up his carreer for no 17 year olds!

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      Most men in their late 30’s are looking for girls in the 19-21 age group (which is college age). Nothing wrong with that at all. We all have our age preferences.

      • OCSugarbaby says:

        L’amant Imaginaire: Oh no YOU didn’t just call me MUCH older!!! Oh sweetie, that will cost ya… lol

  75. GGB says:

    RealisticSD~ So your in your mid/late 30s, and the girls you are meeting are more than half your age? so 18 and younger? Is being with someone under 18 illegal? I think that’s a little wrong!

  76. Did I come across clear in that one I really tried!??

  77. RealisticSD says:

    The whole age thing sometimes feels like numbers. I am in my mid-late 30s, but when I stop and think that some of the girls I am meeting are barely more than half my age, it’s a strange thought. Yet at the same time they don’t feel “too young” for me. I guess one’s perception of age depends to a great extent on maturity of the person involved as well.

  78. sweetsb its fine and it really depends on what type of man he is, a pimp daddy a daddy-daddy a opurtun-daddy

    Pimp-daddy/Suave -daddy: will show you ways/things guys do and tell you how to Watch out for when hes not there!
    Daddy-Daddy-/big ol softee: is really caring about how you feel and wonders if Every thing is going well in your life, hes the one you call when in a bind.
    Opurtun daddy- nassy old man, he dont care about you Really just how long its gonna take you to gratify him! knows you are young and take advantage of your worldliness!

    Then I think the one I like is the money daddy he shows you how to bank your money and put you in a place where you have control of your money.

    if you like the man go with it Dont be no dummy about it though he treats you Well, Englightens you ,expands your horizons.go for it Because when hes gone only…*gone as in the Sugar cycle* the Crem’de la crem of men will be able to apporach you.

    Hello! Thats whats Rellay going on!!

  79. SugaCaneBby says:

    Sweet SB UK – Age ain’t nothing but a number! I mean, there’s generational differences of course, but if you honestly feel a connection with this man, to hell with how old he is. :)

  80. SugaCaneBby says:

    Hey Mz. Red! Not doing much right now except watching an auction wind down. Going to cook dinner in a bit.

  81. sweet SB UK says:

    Mmm, one of my pots, Mr Culture just keeps getting better and better. I really, really like him. He’s absolutely lovely, kind, caring and respectful. He’s interesting to talk to, funny and sweet. He takes care of me and is very considerate. If only he was 10 yrs younger…He’s about 30 yrs older than me. He is really lovely, but nearly as old as my father. Does age matter? Will it be forgotten, the closer we grow?

  82. Gemini29 says:

    Yeah, Kit Kat, the same guy. I WAS really excited, we had a great connection and talks and emails. Maybe it really was business? Maybe he got cold feet?

    Back to the old emailing board. This time I’m trying more specialized messages to guys, see if I get any better responses back. O:-)

  83. congrats Neohio
    awwh Gemi was this mr Rental car dude?? man you sounded all excited! dont worry theres another in the Chute girl!!

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      Welcome Sophie! Sometimes you need to speak up or REPEAT your question. Posts fly so quickly around here!
      Posting a picture is optional, but if you post one without showing your full face or even blurred out works best if you are trying to keep it from your friends.

  84. NeOhio SB says:

    Had an incredible 1st meeting with the pot SD today I had been conversing with for about a week…….and he is definitely a keeper. To al discouraged or hopeless SBs………There IS hope out there…filtering through…but never ever ever give up. The right SD will come along and appreciate what you can bring to the table…and won’t let you go.

  85. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Miz Red hello darling!!!!!!!


  86. ginaZ says:

    Oh pardon my manners howdy Miz Red 😉 OK now I must dash………………………..

  87. ginaZ says:

    Gemini29 I’ve been there I’m afraid. but don’t lose hope dear heart, your lovely, smart, beautiful and will snag a great SD in no time flat. Of course I wish the same for myself and others on the blog too 😉 But, as SFSD said, spilling over ones frustrations or encountering others isn’t the best mix. So…one hopes soon, yes soon it will happen!!!

  88. Gemini29 says:

    *unhappy sigh* So the pot SD I’ve been talking to for weeeks…I guess he has a really really busy schedule… he cancelled our date again due to business. Along with a note that he is too busy for this and gives up. Don’t get me wrong, it was a very nice, very apologetic note, but still. Still unhappy about it. :(

    Sorry, just had to come here to get it off my chest. No one else I can tell, ya know?

  89. Nico says:

    Hola Red…I am just lurking this evening. Had a very LAZY weekend :)

  90. Miz_Red says:

    Good evening everyone!!!
    [*L’Imagine* *Kit Kat* *Nico* *Gina* *Sophie- welcome* *Suga*….& who ever I missed]

    What’s going on here this evening?

  91. NYC SB says:

    SD SF – girls baking brownies in nothing but apron and pearls…. you should see the new VS garment I got… its a ummm apron but uber sexy… I cant wait to make some baked goods in it :)

  92. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    SugaCaneBby- Haha, yes. Quite the minx.

  93. sophie says:

    i didn’t want friends to see my pics.

  94. Nico says:

    Hello Allison….I really appreciate your perspective. Well said :)

  95. SugaCaneBby says:

    L’amant Imaginaire – Mr. Frilly! And it’s an obnoxiously furry, white cat with pretentious green eyes, isn’t it?

    SF SD – Haha, trippy!

    Alison – Co-sign. Except for the in demand part. *shrug* Not having to worry about bills is a delicious luxury. So is not worrying about housework. :3 In the vein of BDSM, I’ve had more than a few men offer to be my chauffeur and sissy maid in exchange for my attention and amusement. I could use a sissy maid right now. My hands are all pruny from doing dishes! Def my least fave part of cleaning.

  96. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Kit Kat: You are the “Kit Kat’s” Pajamas!!!!

    (learned that phrase from an american and am finally glad to be able to use it)

    xx LI xx

  97. only problem he isnt looking for Kit kat.. brownsugarbaby /NASCAR fan arent synonumos*sp* sorta needle in haystak let him find me though Imma show him how off the cuff cuisene*sp* work!!

  98. ginaZ says:

    Kitkat I hope you find a NASCAR man, who appreciates your cooking and pampers you.
    It can happen, yes indeed!

  99. I wouldnt give a lug nut WHAT kinda Racing they did I like all that Stuff lol *blush* monster trucks too! lol I think I need to go see a shrink about this

  100. sophie says:

    i’m new. Do we need to have a photo before getting access to the system?

  101. hello Alison welcome to the blog
    yeah Girl put that in your ah Profile sounds great!!

  102. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Kit Kat- maybe switch to Formula 1, there are loads of wealthy men over here in Europe who watch that.

  103. ginaZ says:

    NeOhio SB I’ve probably only gotten two like this in the past three months, though I suspect the “dominant” SD seeks out the very young SB, assuming that she is and will be submissive because of her youth.

  104. SfSD I wish I could find one. of course I am proabalythe only NASCAR junkie on here I mean Black and Female*unheard of* I think Id be a happy woman, man I could get a photo with Tony stewart oh man maybe Joe gibbs oh heck I could go to Sugar baby heven happy!!
    oh man I am all Excited just thinking about that now!! *tears in eyes*

  105. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    SF SD: Frilly is such an odd name for a pussy. That’s definitely not what I call mine. Girls in pearls baking brownies? Is this going to be stoner episode of desperate housewives?

    Gina Z: Haha, I guess I can see why it would be wierd in this context but you never know, maybe you should talk to the bloke at least.

    I agree. This is the last place you’d have to lie about your income and what not, but some guys have said they do (to me when I’ve asked) because the Caliber of girls increases when they inflate their wealth and decrease their age.

  106. Alison says:

    I love being allowed to give the best parts of a romantic and sexy relationship to a SD. I love it when I’m supported in that role of being fun, sexy, and spoiling towards an SD. I will listen and commiserate with his real life problems and issues, but I won’t lay any of my issues on him. I LOVE this relationship, it comes naturally to me. When properly supported and adored by a SD, I turn into the sweet, sexy goddess I prefer to be… not the girl that is worried about bills and rent, etc. I get to focus on being the happy little sexpot I am. Thanks to all the SDs out there who understand and give this gift to women like me. By the way, I’m still available, but in demand. If you are interested in possibly being my SD, email me soon! xoxo

  107. ginaZ says:

    L’amant Imaginaire yes indeed, I’ll reply in kind.

    So any SB’s on here ever get a pot SD much younger respond? I don’t know it’s a bit odd in this context.

    On a slightly different note…why Lie? Why does a SD lie about, age or income and get so angered when a SB does the same?

  108. SF SD says:

    Hmmm. I sense a possible collaboration here. L’amant Imaginaire creates a treatment for Mr Bowlerhat and Frilly, I add a couple of scenes based on recurring dreams I’ve been having about girls in pearls baking brownies, and SugaCaneBby gets the rights to the trade paperback.

  109. NeOhio SB says:

    Lisa M: I can’t even tell you how many emails I had received to that note of wanting a complete sub woman. Even to the extent of graphics….You WILL stand in the corner for 3 hours while i sleep, with alligator clams, nipple clams all over your body not even to flinch a bit…..and if you dare do so, i will whip you over and over, drawing more and more blood each time………Simply unbelieveable to me.

  110. ginaZ says:

    SFSD wonder if we’ve crossed paths? I’m in SoCal but frequent S.F, my ole’ stompin’ ground.
    We’ve probably persused each others profiles without the other knowing 😉

  111. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Excellent. I will remain persistent in my weirs to seduce you though.
    All it will take is the right literature and good lighting……. (for me not you.)

    Did you get my email darling?

  112. ginaZ says:

    L’amant Imaginaire no worries dear 😉

  113. SF SD says:

    A brilliant comment, Lannie. Thank you so much for posting.

  114. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    SF SD: I’m here all night.

  115. SF SD says:

    Ooops. The ROFL comment was for L’amant, not for you NYC, though I am pleased that you and Mr. CL are providing economic stimulus when we need it most.

  116. NYC SB says:

    Hi everyone!

    Just came back from a fantabulous sugary sweet weekend! Rekindled my affair with one MR Christian Louboutin… oh how good he makes me feel… got some cute things from VS … and topped everything off by booking a half day at the spa… fun fun fun

  117. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Mr. Frilly-LOL Sounds like the name of a British Pornstar’s cat or something.
    Some gentleman in Bowlerhat and nothing else, with a very posh accent roaming about shouting, “Madame, before we have intercourse would you kindly let Mr. Frilly out into the garden?”

  118. Lannie says:

    Would you withhold certain info in a sugar-arrangement that you’d otherwise be honest & upfront about in a ‘traditional’ relationship?

    I have only had one SD relationship and it lasted quite a long time. I must say that initially I was worried about how much to reveal about myself. As time progressed my SD actually became a very close respected friend whom I could be totally upfront and honest with. For me in a traditional relationship I put stuff right out there compared to taking things much more gradually with my SD. The difference was that I felt I never had to put on airs behind close doors with my SD and it gave me the ability to experiment with my own senuality and sexuality which in a traditional relationship I found I was always trying to please yet not be pleased.

    Are sugars expected to be as forthcoming about their personal feelings as those in traditional relationships?

    I think this actually depends on one’s SD as each person has different views of what they want out of an agreement and there are some who prefer not to know in any great detail their SB or SD. I haven’t had a short term SD so I am not sure but I know the first six months of my arrangement we were learning about each other and I simply let him take the lead on what he wanted to reveal and what he wanted to learn about me and as trust grew which is so important in a suger relationship so did each of our insights into each others thoughts and feelings. Having said all this I must say that for me a sugar relationship is an arrangement that benefits both sides with out the turmoil that is often in a traditional relationship. I also find it very exciting to sometimes not see or hear from my SD for weeks at a time as it made the passion on getting together much more exciting.

    Is ‘lie’ too strong a word for simple sugar-sweetness?

    I think lie is too strong a word in many ways. Being called a sugar is actually all about a genuine sweetness or a put on one but it is fundamentally minding your manners in public, dressing up when asked, letting your hair down when asked and not bringing drama and stress in the sugar relationship. For me people have many different facets to their personalities and lifes, and though they may be contradictions they are not necessarily lies.

  119. SF SD says:

    I think SweetJess has got it right. If Mr. Frilly turns out to be a real SD, he can take her lingerie shopping, and they can both have a good time. Meanwhile, there are plenty of photos of the type he is requesting elsewhere on the web.

  120. SF SD says:

    > KitKat sez – “SfSd I will like to inform you with all due respect!!”

    Damn, how can I refuse that offer? I can use a little respect.

    Fact is, you’ve changed my life. I can never walk by the candy machine again without, well…

    Have no worries about offending me. As SF SD I may write in Standard Expository Prose, but it would be sooooooooo boring if everyone wrote that way. A little sass in the blog is a good thing.

    A couple of points on the discretion stuff. Yah, *69 keeps your number from showing up on caller ID (better than trying to find a pay phone), but doesn’t eliminate all records of the call — so you don’t want to depend on this if the spouse can review the bill online. Also, pay-as-you-go phones don’t all have to be set up on the web. Did mine from a land line, no name or address required, and bought top-up cards off the rack. Very civilised.

    Also, no big prob with posting a disguised email address here, as long as you realize that anyone can read it and you can cancel the mailbox if you need to. In more personal situations, it seems than Stephan can get you in touch with another SB if you ask nicely.

    ‘Spose there are any NASCAR daddies at the track?

  121. Lisa Marie says:

    missed the main part of the frilly lingeire but I agree with the email your going to send him

  122. SweetJess says:

    Yes he meant “frilly” lingerie. I have mentioned that I do not own these items but are open to the idea once we get to know one another!!! I will send him an email stating that I am not comfortable sending those types of pics in an email. Sounds good?

  123. Lisa Marie says:

    its witty kit kat…lol

    and yeah you learned something new ha ha
    i couldnt beleve he emailed me that!

  124. is it Wit? whitty or witty? please tell me I hat eo make ignorant typo’s lol!

  125. hey lisa hows it going my friend? so sub dosent mean a stand in for the Regulaar teacher!! lol I learend somethin yesterday!!

  126. Lisa Marie says:

    Ok sugars, back from last night…
    Gemini…no I am not a sub….never have been. And I thought there were sites out there for BDSM. SO why is he on here? It kinda creeped me out a bit.

  127. inside track I dunno What you call the place where all the R.V’s are at, but thats where I wanna be!!!
    Photo we gotta do that Angle

  128. I really like you all, I so appreciate you alls advice
    L’amant again you are so intresting I love to Read your comments, what Whit
    I like all of you Really suga my together side gina my editor
    OC my translator, Gemi the interperter! and nyc Where to start a voice of reason.
    anyway anybody know anybody of the Nascar presuasion? boy Would I love some tickets to Center track.. I know Somebody knows somebody!!

  129. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    SF SD: Pants in UK english is Knickers. Frilly means lacy as far as I know. I don’t use the word very much.

    GinaZ: I was just making a joke and if it offended ever so sorry love, I would never intentionally be inappropriate (unless for comic relief) and if that wasn’t funny then it was inappropriate and I’m uber sorry.

  130. SugaCaneBby says:

    Gemini29 – Haha, I’m glad I’m not the only one who thinks the way I do. I seriously feel like I am sometimes. *phew*

    ginaZ – I was a staff writer with a reservation agency until April. Drove me crazy and sapped me of not only my will to create, but my will to live, lol. Got laid off so I’m just appreciating the odd assignments I find online to write articles to supplement my pt time retail gig and build my portfolio up. Think I might find my niche in being a columnist for the time being. I thoroughly enjoy writing fiction more because it’s what I started out with and what inspired me to write in the first place. Plus, you get to “break the rules” a bit. 😉

    I like using my computer’s word processor to write because it’s fast but it’s too easy to second-guess what I’ve written and attempt to tweak it before I’ve finished the “creative run”. Writing in a notebook is a bit too slow for me as my handwriting and it’s fluctuations are distracting. So I figure a typewriter gives me the speed I want with the push to keep going despite the miscellaneous typo, scratch-out, or bland word.

  131. ginaZ says:

    Ah yes the pic request. I wonder how many of these are just the thrill of it. SD’s who never intend to meet, it’s just the fantasy. Yesterdays request, the 10Million dollar man DEMANDED them and because I said wait, he became arrogant and rude. At which point I don’t care if he was the 50 Billion dollar man.

    On a slightly different note, a pot SD emailed me, he’s 16 years my junior. He is on a different tier than most on SA, but I’ll take chemistry over denominational amount any day.

  132. ginaZ says:

    Suga how far along are you on the writing front? Do you like writing fiction more?
    I like the idea you have, writing on a typewriter, I’ve never actually done it. First draft is write, write, write, and then the editing. I’ve grown to love it though 😉

  133. SF SD says:


    “He hasn’t set a time or place to meet but has requested that I send him a pic wit me wearing something “frilly”…”

    Your correspondent may have been asking for a photo of you in something traditionally feminine. On the other hand, I believe that “frillies” is Brit-slang for lingerie. (Lisa and L’amant may be our experts here.)

    You may have encountered a photo collector. The general advice would be to listen to your instincts and stay within your comfort zone.

  134. Gemini29 says:

    SugaCaneBby – I’m starting to feel like we are sisters separated at birth…I agree with so much of what you say! :)

  135. and hello Suga hope your day is going alright!! see you all on a caution!!

  136. well guys I think NASCAR is on, Ive got to go get in touch with my motorsports side

  137. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Yo Gina Z! You have mail.

  138. SugaCaneBby says:

    Typo up there: I meant “Attractive people get looked at for the WRONG reasons, i.e. more beauty than brains.” I don’t think some people understand how it is to be having a nice convo with someone and then have them all of a sudden go “Yeah, so when can I tap that?” in so many words. :( And it’s amazing we’re single, huh? Lol.

  139. SugaCaneBby says:

    TLG – LOL! Nice quip, the TX line, but if I had used it, my entire email explaining that he should have taken time out to get to know what impresses me instead of dropping some (bogus) numbers, then he might have had a chance would be hypocritical then. I try to stay civil here as far as rejecting people, don’t push me to be my usually scathing self, haha!

    Seriously, guys: You could have a nub where your “manhood” should be but if you’re sweet, charming, funny, and have a big heart, then you have NOTHING to worry about. From some women anyway. If they find personality and brains to be more of an aphrodisiac then you’ve possibly gotten practice in figuring out how to make your nub work for you and are the best lay regardless of what Mr. Anaconda is rocking…because those guys just look at women like nails and they’re a hammer. Yeowch.

    Guess I’ve finally switched over to “motion of the ocean” as opposed to “size of the boat”.

    On the sugars dating outside of sugar thing…I think it’s pretty believable for an attractive person to be single because usually that attractive person is looked at for the long reason and never finds their match. *hint hint* Do you know what I’m saying? I did the whole relationship thing once and it was an utterly life-shattering experience, being manipulated and lied to and used and time and time again he’d show and even TELL me how worthless I was and I’d just be my dumb, loyal self albeit MISERABLE and unable to function without second guessing what that implied as far my “relationship”. Do I want that again? No thanks. Single works for me just dandy. I throw myself into being dedicated heart and soul and since most traditional relationships require certain sacrifices, I’d rather avoid the garbage that boys my age bring but I know that older men won’t quite get me either. C’est la Vie.

    Then again, I know waaaaaaaay too many females who call me up belly-aching about the collapse of their recent fling because they “loved” him and blah blah blah. I suppose my advice for that is to get yourself a secure woman who can function without men fawning over her. If she reaps her self-worth simply from the fact that she’s dating someone (because in society’s eyes, this means she’s “wanted” she’s “loved” she’s “worthy” or whatever), then you stay far away because she’ll drive you crazy with her neediness. Ya need a chick who can do bad all by herself and is proud of it! 😀

    And back to a lighter note…I suppose I need a SD who can cater to my ebay addiction atm. XD My lust for writing fiction has returned and since my old typewriter is back at my mother’s house, I’ve been scouring the web looking for another one. Heheh, I just like the feel of working in different mediums. Opens up a whole new creative faucet for me and cuts down on the urge to edit (editing in first drafts is the enemy).

  140. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Well as long as you pencil me in for sex………. 😉 It’s a mutual tea and cake.

    I expect full benefits. LOL

  141. ginaZ says:

    L’amant Imaginaire you can email me at g i a s w i s h at the ole’ y place as well. I may be in Europe, one month study program, but not till July 10′ likely Stratford, London and maybe a trip to Ireland. Who knows what can transpire by then though. Please pencil me in for tea and cake 😉

  142. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Kit Kat has my email address if you want to get it from her to chat in private sometime xx

  143. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Merci, my darling Gina Z. Shame we can’t have this discussion over
    a good cup of tea and some cakes because perhaps we all have the answers to the questions we ask each other but have limitations as we are in a room full of strangers and who really wants to take their clothes off?

  144. SF SD says:

    The Lone Gunman says:
    September 20, 2009 at 8:21 am

    RealisticSD: I always operate under the assumption that I am not the only one in an SBs life…

    ginaZ: The sweetness of Sugar, coupled with the ability to be open to regular experiences you find attractive as well…

    SugaCaneBby: It irritates me no end when someone from my locale does something like this. I’d block him at once….

    What you said, bro. On all counts.

  145. ginaZ says:

    L’amant Imaginaire yes… the movie (forgot the name) did come to mind when the “everyone has a price” comment came up. One million?

    In the context of SA yes I suppose there is a price, denomination. And love to me is priceless. So yes I’d walk away from sugar in a heartbeat.

    Outside of sugar though is a bit different. Not all young girls have a price. I remember when I was 20 or so if a much older man would have proposed something like that I would have thrown a drink in his face or been grossed out. By 30 yes I would have entertained the fantasy if it was a VERY charming man. But I was even then looking for love not gifts or baubles.

    L’amant Imaginaire you are the exception, very bright, sophisticated and quite rare my dear. 😉

  146. sweet Jess
    ??Frilly ?? like a Frilly dress? Frilly under garments? maybe you should tell him you dont have that item but once you get to know him you will indulge him?? thats kinda cute if its just innocent, he likes a lady in Super Girly mode?
    trust your instincts sister!!

  147. Gemini29 says:

    SweetJess – I’m a bit at a loss about the frilly thing…does he mean girly or just…frilly? *shrugs* Anyway, I’d be more concerned about him going from wanting to meet in person to wanting to IM….that seems rather “cold feet”ish to me. It depends if you are comfortable chatting online some more or if you really want to just meet and see if you like him in person and vice versa. I would def email him though and see if you two are still on for your lunch date.

  148. ginaZ says:

    SFSD you never disappoint excellent advice!

  149. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Yo Gina Z, when’s the last time you watched Indecent Proposal? -x-

    I refer to the scene in which Robert Redford is playing Woody Harrelson in a
    game of pool and the aforementioned topic of “everyone has a price” comes into play. I think that in the present tense we all have a price. In the long term, you’ve said it yourself how you’d walk away from the sugar lifeif you found true love……….

    That’s why the age difference is the key to alot of arrangements. The present tense of thought is easier to buy from a young girl when you are and perhaps as an older man given up waiting on any sort of happy ending and instead go to sauna where she’ll just give you one quicker. Verility vs. Destitution…….

  150. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    RealisticSD~ It is true that it works like that in the real world. That is how me and my ex-SD started out. And we stayed together for a long time!
    I do wish more of you , SF SD, and SE where on here, things would be so much easier!

    SF SD~I do wish all men on here knew how to be an SD, unfortunately not all do. It’s hard work , you are so right.
    As for safety, Yes, DO NOT Put your EMAIL HERE!!! I learned the hard way! Anyone can read the blog. I know!

  151. SfSd I will like to inform you with all due respect!! At&t if you call *69 It does not show up on the phone but If you go into you account on the internet all calls made and recieved are there With the numbers you simply have to look at the time call was placed/received!
    on that note yes, a cell phone is a good idea but a prepaid and one that you have to register I suggest that you use a false address one that is out of state/ boost mobile has a 50 a month plan talk/text/walkietalkie all you want! but turn your Gps locator off!!
    additonally if you get calls that are harrasing they would Change the phone number up to 3 x before charging you*boost mobile*
    I dont mean to offend please dont take it that way! just want all our options out there!

  152. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Realistic SD: I’ve had that type of “arrangement” before in which it was sugar dating but it started off a certain way then evolved into an arrangement. Suffice to say it worked out quite well but I was much much younger (and I’m quite young now) and you have to be in the right frame of mind when doing this without the aide of the template like seeking arrangement to lay the ground work.

  153. Gemini29 says:

    SF SD – As always, very good advice. They should make a FAQ for newbies and stick that up there as one of the first things to read. :)

  154. SweetJess says:

    Ok girls!! I am fairly new to this site. I am talking to pot SD in my area for 3 wks now and he wants to meet. But this last week he has been pushing for me to think “frilly”. We set up a lunch date for Friday Sept 18th and he cancelled on me saying that he had board meeting that day. I didn’t think nothing of it and rescheduled for tomorrow (mon). He hasn’t set a time or place to meet but has requested that I send him a pic wit me wearing something “frilly” in it and says that we could IM tomorrow. What do you guys think?

  155. ginaZ says:

    Realistic it’s just semantic, words misunderstood. Though I still don’t think everyone has a price (woman/man) or wants to be taken care of. In the context of “sugar” and a site like SA it’s different. In real life one can be given things and gifts and helped and get nothing more than a peck on the cheek or a muffled thanks. I guess that’s why a site like Sa is more honest in a way.

  156. Realistic I did not misunderstand*which is a rareity*
    and like I said that actuall scenerio has happen before, I was shopping though and I didnt have enough for all the items and I was attempting to put on lay-a way, I figured Id try the stuff on just to be sure and When I came out to the lay-a way counter the lady says thankyou hands me a bag and said the this was a gift from this man had his Company on it!

    I called in my shakey voice to say thankyou and I never heard from him again!
    I think its the Sugarcane down there got Everybody a little forward!

  157. SF SD says:

    More Miscellaneous Thoughts:

    Seems like I mention this every two or three blogs, but I guess it’s worth repeating. Get a free email account to use for SA. Don’t use the same name that you use for your regular email, MySpace, or Facebook. Use a different handle for the blog than you do for email, and remember that anybody on the Internet can read the blog and search it. Don’t give out your phone number to people you don’t know. Block your number when you call a pot SD. Consider a cheap, pay-as-you-go cell phone. A couple of people have also suggested gmail’s new phone forwarding service.

    Remember, this is the Internet. SA does a much better job managing things that your average social site, but there’s no way they can police hundreds of thousands of subscribers. Every web site has a few weirdos and creeps. Share whatever information you feel comfortable with with your SD or SB. But there’s no point in broadcasting information that allows anyone in the world to find out where you live and work, who your relatives are, etc. And should you ever need to show someone the door, you can get a new sugar mailbox and phone number without cutting off your lifeline to the rest of the world.

    You know me. I’m Mr. Discretion. That’s just my point of view.

    Okay, so you’ve discovered that there are, um, individuals who feel that characteristics of their package are their defining features, either in their profiles, photos, or messages. Don’t give them a second thought. If you communicate with them, you just reinforce their twisted egos and/or their superficial view of women. Just delete and block.

    We all do a lot of screening, some of it unpleasant. Even so, try to keep your reaction to a rude person you may have just encountered from spilling over into the next dialogue with a potential. The new guy might be someone you really want to talk to, and he might just move on if his initial encounter with you is laden with resentment and suspicion. This is hard work. But remember that, as stereotyped as we may sometimes seem, males are individuals. There are princes to be found among the frogs.

    If you looked up SuthrnExec’s suggestions for identifying fake SDs, you found that “a genuine SD will be concerned about you and your feelings and your comfort level.” I think this is the most important guideline of all.

  158. RealisticSD says:

    I think my comment about everyone having a price was misunderstood. I don’t mean it as a sex-for-pay thing, but more like a “I’ll take great care of you” kind of thing and then let her reciprocate however she feels comfortable. That is how sugar dating works in the real world–the man starts providing to a friend or colleague or coworker or acquaintance, typically with no stated expectation in return, and things move on from there.

  159. Gemini29 says:

    Morning sugars!! (or afternoon really)

    HAHAH! that’s the guy I was talking about with his tushie pics!

  160. oh dont tempt me.. omg your backside wow i never seen one like that or

    is all your laundry dirty?

  161. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    ok I am off sugars, have a great afternoon y’all!

  162. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    OC~ I know, right? this guy thinks he’s turning us on or something?

  163. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    LMAO Kit Kat you are too funny! you should mail him lol

  164. ok WTH is up whit his booty on here like that!! hes too old for booty photos!! comon whats Really going on???
    Somebody need to tell him WE all Seen hineys before!!

  165. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    lmao, he needs new photos! he should be flexing lol
    sorry i’m not being nice lmao

  166. photogirl says:

    GinaZ – Oh no… I wouldn’t be able to approach a married man IRL… yes I said it was tempting, I found him very attractive, but then saw the ring. So that is what really kept me from approaching him. I don’t need any bad karma coming or going!

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      When I see pictures like that I am so turned off. But he is proud of his little tushie. I actually prefer a little more substance to my man. 😉

  167. Buttcheek man??? o- you guys are too much!!

  168. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Seriously Butt Cheek guy needs new photos! lmao, why do that?

  169. ginaZ says:

    Me thinks I need to slug a2 liters of coffee to start up. Feelin a bit so so.

    Howdy Miss OC! sunny over here in So Cal. Me: a bit groggy not my normal chipper self. so apologies to the blog I will shake away the grey today.

  170. ginaZ says:

    Kit-Kat! Ha! That gave me a nice lil’ chuckle. Garlic 10 cloves standin’ by 😉

  171. ginaZ says:

    PHOTOgirl..IRL approach a pot SD/SB?

    No. And I’d definitely stop short of a married one. That’s karma ready to slap me back me day. If a married man or someone in a committed relationship is on site like SA would that make a difference? In a way yes. But I have found that to be a more slippery slope. Someone single is less complicated and there isn’t someones wife or children that weighs in.

    Caveat emptor: There is a hidden danger when one becomes a SD/SB. It tends to cloud ones thinking, assuming everyone has a price. yikes! This becomes a bit of the buyer and seller mentality, commodities and such. Prostitution and whatever else one wants to call it.

  172. Realistic I give you that on the Unsafe thing I hadnt thought about the Other freebies out there! I conseed!*sp*
    Realistic you must be Joking the Way you do that is Hi hello my name is Can I take you to dinner! i
    If she is At the Store hang around and buy what she has in her cart Walk off but leave your contact info!
    like a buisness card,
    believe me this works!! the guys in belle glade are notorious for pulling Stunts like that!
    I had a 15 year old tell me lets go to the hair salon so you can get your hair done, now I said 15 because just so happened I knew his dad, and when I told his dad, he said what is the problem??
    anyway long story short if she Calls you then you find out what she is about, I mean look at it She just got a few bucks free’d up to spoil herself!!

    Gina hey lady hope you got that Garlic sitting next to your Router! lol

    OC I am so sorry I thought it was Nyc I am so sorry but Yes I do like this knick-name!

  173. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    OC have some sun for me,,,, i’m freezing here!

  174. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    OC~ i know all about the chakras, I have a friend that does that! I also took a course to know how to do it!
    New SDs are harder I think, but we are talking, he seems so nice, and yes he’s from Cali so for me a huge plus!

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      Hi Miss GinaZ: I hope you are enjoying this wonderful sunny day we have lined up for us today! I myself will get out there to enjoy it while it lasts.

      “What is a Mistress”
      “A woman between a man and a matress”

      Sorry, I just couldn’t help myself. It made me laugh when I read it and wanted to lighten the mood! Enjoy your day Sugars and I will catch up later. ~TA

      • OCSugarbaby says:

        Photogirl: That is too funny! No, I have not seen the movie. But I will see if I can find it! My next adrenaline junkie adventure is a days lesson on driving for speed. It is a course on a professional driving track. Ohhh baby, how fun is that going to be!
        Kisses to Moose!

  175. ginaZ says:

    Photogirl…yes probably some maybe even a small percentage are $ugar, but many are simply relationships, dating, marraiages where there is a simply a difference. My father’s two wives were both 16 years younger, but I would have hardly call my father a sugar daddy. It’s widely accepted in many cultures as well.

  176. photogirl says:

    RealisticSD – I agree with OC… I think I’d be a bit taken a back if you approached it in that manner! I was thinking more along the lines of casual conversation to get the ball rolling… throwing a few hints in there to see what kind of reaction I got.

    So I am still really curious… ANY SD’s or SB’s approach what they thought to be pot sugars’s IRL?

    OC – Glad you had a great time! Have you seen the movie ‘Flirting With 40? Heather Locklear plays the lead woman and it involves ‘surfing lessons’. I thought of that when I first read about your lessons and Duce. Based on a true story and I happen to know the real life couple. They just had themselves a future little surfer :)

  177. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    OC~I’m working on it, have an SD that i’m talking too, he’s in the OC lol and comes here twice a month, My perfect situation! YAY
    I so can’t wait, it’s way too cold here! He seems really nice, but he has never done the SD thing… I hope it works out, i’m missing the connection you know? And the perks!
    I couldn’t get to sleep last night, so where else would i be? lol
    I actually told a friend of mine to get on the site, she did, and got like 10 mails already… she’s a lucky girl i tell ya!

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      Sweety: That sounds wonderful! He can bring you a little sunshine. Don’t shy away from those who have never done the SD thing before. It could be fun to form your own sugar foundation with him and build it to be what YOU BOTH want it to be.
      I have an SB friend in Texas and we were talking about Chakra Clearing. It is a very fun and easy form of meditation (not something I am really into). But it’s concept is to balance your energy and clear out all the old bad feelings and thoughts and allow the new to begin. Just had mine done last week and it has done wonders. Positive energy will attract positive people! So far so good!!!

  178. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    OC~ glad you had fun Surfing! I so wish I was there with you girl!

    Good morning sugars!

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      Hi Sweety: Did you guys pull an all nighter on the blog? lol
      How are things to the North? You will have to let me know when you come to Cali!

  179. RealisticSD says:

    Kit-Kat: “I cant see being unsafe in any light.” I agree, but not all STDs are prevented by condoms. Genital warts, genital lice, and herpes are prime examples. Plus, condoms are not perfectly effective for either STD prevention or contraception. With typical use, there is a 15% per year chance of getting pregnant using only a condom as the method of contraception. Plus, think about it, how many times do you wash dishes with a latex glove and then find out that your finger got wet?

    GinaZ: “Curious what your view is on a SB who is married or has a boyfriend.” Well, a married SB is out of the question for me. With a boyfriend, I might be OK with it. But somehow every SB claims to be totally single and not dating anyone, which to me is suspicious. Why would these good-looking young college girls not be dating anyone? Their answer is that they don’t find their colleagues in school that appealing. Maybe true–some women prefer much more older/accomplished men, but I always wonder if they are telling the truth. The problem with having a serious boyfriend is that it is always the elephant in the room, and they will always be considering him in our interactions as well. Indeed, I lost a wonderful SB to a new BF, as she started feeling “guilty” about things. Amazingly, she still was hoping for my support, but was not willing to offer anything but a platonic relationship in return.

    Photogirl: “So how do you approach someone IRL that you think may be a pot SD?” I have wondered the same. Sometimes I see a girl who just looks like she’d be “the perfect SB” for me. It is socially awkward to walk up to someone and bring it up, but I am tempted to give it a try. I figure everyone has a price and they just have to name theirs.

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      Sugar Ahh Honey Honey you are my CANDY GIRL and you got me WANTING you…

      Good morning! I survived the surfing lesson. It was “totally RAD” lol Seriously it was a blast, I spent more time taking face plants in the water but loved every minute of it and can’t wait til my next lesson! NYC SB: Duce invited me to have beers with he and his buddies afterwards. ~ smile (far too young for your cougar remark, but smiled non the less). Besides, I like my men older!
      Wow, missed a lot…

      Kit-Kat: Glad you liked the nick-name I gave you (it was me not NYC as you mentioned in the blog) Oh and another name for “Mistress” can be “Paramour” which means lover.

      RealisticSd: Can you really expect all college age women to have the same relationship outlook and expectations that you do? What did you want at that age? I do have to say that there are some VERY special SB’s on the blog who are in college. Many of which, do have a full understanding and ability to execute that same concept you are seeking.

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      RealisticSD wrote:
      “It is socially awkward to walk up to someone and bring it up, but I am tempted to give it a try. I figure everyone has a price and they just have to name theirs. ”
      OC Says: Oh Chi-Wow-wa you didn’t mean walk up to a girl and ask her how much? lol

  180. see you all ladys and gents later Going for a walk!!!

  181. L’amant
    “Shag two guys at once” thats classic!! I will be thinking of Austen powers all day now!

  182. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Lone Gunman:

    I would hope my current SD doesn’t operate on the fact that I’m not seeing anyone else but him, because I’m not. I don’t care who he sees that’s his business I agree with you there, but I don’t like multiple situations myself and would hope that monogamy even in a casual sense still counts for something as I’d never shag two guys at once. We both have our profiles up and active, but now I just use it to pass time at work or when I’m bored on a lazy Sunday afternoon like today and he does as well.

  183. Miz_Red says:

    Good morniiiiing!!!!! =)

    [As to your last line about “bigger in Texas”….PERFECT!]
    & great responses to the others as well!

    xo- Red

  184. The Lone Gunman says:

    Good morning campers! Having a great Sugar-filled weekend?

    RealisticSD says:
    ..Conversely, if it is not OK for a SB to have more than one SD for the reasons enumerated…Is it necessary for the SD to disclose the presence of other SBs to each SB? I appreciate any opinions on this issue.

    RealisticSD, I always operate under the assumption that I am not the only one in an SBs life, absent total, indisputable evidence to the contrary. To think otherwise is IMO fooling myself.

    Consider this: in the Mundane world, it’s acceptable for men and women to have multiple boy/girlfriends (who usually do not know of one another and the depth of the relationship) and no one gives a flip. Why should the Sugar world be any different?

    ginaZ says:
    ..I prefer to feel free enough to date, as it’s my hope to have a more traditional relationship.

    Yours is, IMO, the prevalent mindset in this regard. The sweetness of Sugar, coupled with the ability to be open to regular experiences you find attractive as well. A well-grounded SD understands this, and actually wants you to be free to be yourself, as he wants the same freedom when you are not together.

    SugaCaneBby says:
    HELP!!! Chatting with a “SD” from Dallas who just got all frank with the sex part of all this. I asked him what he was looking for and he responded by saying he likes to keep things simple: He’d pay bills and give me gifts while I spoil his 8″ long, 3″ round “friend”.

    He completelty jumped the gun with that comment. How should I proceed?

    It irritates me no end when someone from my locale does something like this. I’d block him at once. This man has no redeeming social values, and certainly doesn’t reflect well on the other Texas SDs–of which I am one.

    As to response (if you want one prior to block): “Gee, I thought things were supposed to be bigger in Texas…” :)


  185. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    snbsd~I think, from the other profiles I have seen, that the more information there is the better. I like to know what a person likes to do, what they expect and so forth. It makes it easier for SBs to know more about you, so they can see if they like some of the same things. One SD said in his profile that he was an avid wine savant, I am new the discovering wines so I thought it was great that I could of learned more!
    You don’t have to make it a sales brochure, be yourself. I like to know more, if someone says in their profile I am here contact me. I dont know him , so what do I write in the mail? just my thoughts, hope that gives you something!
    I’m sure other SDs on here will help you as well.
    By the way Welcome!

  186. snbsd says:

    Hello SB’s!

    I have a question from a new SD – is it best for a POTSD to be heavy on details his profile, or to leave some things to a meeting? (Marital status, time expectations, details about hobbies, etc…) I would love some opinions on how much is too much before you first meet. Is my profile a sales brochure or simply – hey, here I am.


  187. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    photogirl~ i have never approached anyone! I had an SD for 15 years about so, this searching is all new to me! and I find it very hard… I’ve been single now for 3 years and i miss the connection.
    All the SDs here aren’t interested , it seems…. Apparently it’s my location. And some I have talked too have no clue what it’s all about…. I wish i knew how to approach someone i would so do it.
    I hate the too far away thing…. or too close! i got that one too!

  188. photogirl says:

    Ha Kat! Yes… I do have a perfect SD on my mind…but unfortunately he is too far away! So for now he remains an online SD friend :)

  189. photogirl says:

    Yes Sweety I should have… He was married so I was looking to see if he was going to be joined by a woman at any moment, which never happened. We made eye contact a few times… I could have been wrong but he just seemed to have this persona of being an SD… I know that sounds odd as I don’t know what that ‘persona’ is. There was just something about him.

    So how do you approach someone IRL that you think may be a pot SD?

  190. Atl
    there is a article on Negotiating with a Sd on the blog main page Just Scroll down. I hope it helps.

  191. She is Waiting for her Perfect SD!! right photo!!
    girl I done got into some soda, yall know how I get but I think I will at least go do my core Exercises to tired me out!
    night photo Talk at you Tomorrow!

  192. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    photogirl~ you so should of!

  193. photogirl says:

    Sweety SB – I am in Florida… I never paid much attention until recently.
    As I was waiting in the lobby of this very nice hotel were the reception was I noticed a very attractive gentleman waiting for the airport shuttle… It was so tempting to strike up a conversation with him… but I didn’t have the courage.

    Hey Kit Kat!! Tired as hell….should be sleeping!

  194. oops I lied I would PREFER an experinced one but the 2 at the top of the POTS list are a experinced and a non experinced one !
    gotta sift girl and look for Chemistry!

  195. I am a newsb and right now I only want a Experinced Sugardaddy until I get my Wings !!

  196. humm photo!! how you and yes the Seeking arrangement book Should be a Requirement before they let you in the Blog area,

    Atlnicole welcome we are glad you here on this website you can get the book for Cheaper then at ama zon place

  197. AtlNicole says:

    Thanks Suga. That seems to be the easiest wayto handle it, but what would you do if he does not seem comfortable bringing it up? Maybe i should stick to experienced SDs.

    I had a good Saturday. I actually got to sleep in! Up late now working on a homework project. I’m afraid i let them pile up on me again :(

  198. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Photogirl~ where are you at? I find that many people are in Sugar relationships , but i have been noticing for years

  199. photogirl says:

    Hello everyone!

    I haven’t seen OC post since her surfing lesson… anyone hear from her?

    Busy day for me, just got home from shooting a Greek/Italian wedding, was interesting. I could not help but notice the age difference between several of the ‘couples’ and wonder if there was any $ugar goin’ on. Does anyone else notice these things when they are out and about or am I just too much of a people watcher?

    I hope everyone had a great Saturday… I am exhausted!

  200. SugaCaneBby says:

    AtlNicole – The book (The Seeking Arrangement Book) suggests leaving the topic of money for the SD in the arrangement to bring up. That way, he won’t feel pressured or get the wrong impression about you.

  201. SugaCaneBby says:

    Lol @ intelligent crack addicts.

    I suppose once I feel my pro is in peak condition, I’ll add my number to my name. Just shy because for one, the pics don’t convey what I want them to as it pertains here and I feel as if I could expand a little bit more on my profile. Get a little bit more specific about my interests and let my personality shine through. Just biding my time.

  202. AtlNicole says:

    New to this blog…and really blogging in general, but I want to give it a try.
    I am new to SA, but have had a happy SD relationship in the past with an older man I met IRL. I have found some good advice on these lists as far as weeding through the flakes and con artists that I may find during my searches, but I have not found any advice about the actual negotiations. Hopefully I will be able to find an experienced SD who knows how this works, but even then, he may expect me to bring up my financial needs. At what point is it considered rude to bring up the subject? First meeting? Or should I bring it up before that point? I am not trying to waste anybody’s time, and I have tried to be as up front as I can in my profile about what I am looking for.
    On another note, are there any experienced sugars in the ATL area? I just moved here and I am trying to make some connections.

  203. what is another word for mistress?

  204. baby daddy off line yikes! whats he drinking!! he didnt read your profile at all he just seen Sugarbaby! idiot!!

  205. I think the Guys on sa play little bit too! I am calling yall on the carpet..
    when I put my number up I got lots of hits! I at least know who some are!!
    I think the Really choosy ones will sit back and see if your story stays constant, what type of meddle you have,
    and yeah I have had to Shut a few down too I am not on drugs and I dont want your money, dude says well you want a sugar daddy, I say 50 dollars is not Enough to buy the nikes on my feet! yuck I mean they are Silly here too, I say comon look at me DO I LOOK like amywinehouse

  206. SugaCaneBby says:

    Kit-Kat, Older men can be just as down and dirty as well…lol. A boy is a boy is a boy, no matter the age, the same way you can find some 14 year “Men”. You know what I mean.

    I bid ol’ dude a good day because he obviously hadn’t read my profile. He said he was on here for fun because everyone who meets him is trying to marry him and have his baby. *psh* Um, yeah. I clearly list NSA on my profile. Not trying to get down like that at all. Was actually debating a friend about the sanctity of marriage last night, but that’s another subject.

  207. suga Imma have to use what you said thats good!
    well if that is it then that is How you Should hsve handled it!
    I just find some guys just dont know what to say so they start off with What they can do. its hard to grasp a relationship that has the money exchange, but I say dont Everybody have a sis/cuz that has a boyfriend that Does nothing but mooch, you Expect a man to Help out for a woman hes involved with, but When its nearly Demanded oh your some kinda low class bimbo! ol’d school guys get this concept inherently, has anybody else noticed this.. like the ones 40’ish and up

  208. SugaCaneBby says:

    Most men with money that I come across seem to take me for desperate and that’s not the case at all. I wish someone would take time out to get to know me as an individual and what it is that actual impresses me rather than looking at my gender and ethnicity and thinking they have me all figured out. According to the book, the tagline on my profile may be mediocre, but I believe it sums me up nicely. “Intelligent, more than meets the eye…”

  209. SugaCaneBby says:

    I let him know that I am looking for more than just financial support and am seeking someone who is looking for more than just sexual gratification. Yes, it made me very uncomfortable. I take it just a tad bit personal when a man automatically jumps to that conclusion and it happens even when I’m not on this website. -_-;;; I suppose I’m still trying to hang onto my pre-pubescent years where I could be around someone of the opposite sex and not have to worry about them having impure thoughts about me. Eh.

  210. suga I support you in your choice. he wasn’t a keeper?

    I was talking to this guy this morning and man what a jerk at first but he then began to Explain himself alittle and long story short, hes to aggressive for me but AT least in his nonsense he had a theroy!

    my theory on him is Somebody told him he was cute too many times so he Expect me to act like his Groupie! *buzzer* wrong answer!

  211. hey Gemi!! you can stay up with us you dont need to get your rest!!

  212. SugaCaneBby says:

    I really think it should be required for sugars to read the bloody book. Then they would know what’s a no-no. Ewwy indeed. Once again, this lady is not dazzled by name brands or size, thanks.

  213. Gemini29 says:

    SugaCaneBby – Well…how would you normally proceed? He’s only interested in his sexual gratification…are you comfortable with that? If he’s jumping the gun in your book, but not in his, perhaps there is a difference in what you two want?

    I’d probably tell him just that…that he is jumping the gun and you are more interested in “blah blah blah blah blah” and see what he says. Although he was pretty darn upfront. Wow. And Ewwy.

  214. suga the dude that didnt want to send me his pic he kinda keep talking to me and I think I may meet him Without just because he has been very matter of fact with me, so with that I say KEEP AT IT SUGA!! dont get scared off just cuz hiz /appendage is now handeling the typing!
    did you ask if this is his First sugar experince??
    ILike to know that They know what the up’s are.
    , but if he starts in on you a gold digger and the Sex for money , then you Burn his grits!! hehe Good luck sis!!

  215. very well put Gemi and I was wondering When some one Would get my Wise crack!
    ya know the more I think about what Realistic said the more I wonder,
    in my particular case I could do that because I tend to find Apples here and oranges over there
    say a sd that is a great supporter or then one who just like to Take charge . the line on the diffrent men wouldnt cross be cause I need both at diffrent times, same in life you have your Best Girlfriend to tell you No not that dress
    and then you got you Best girlfriend she always is the diplomat!

    I had a boyfriend*now ex* for years and he was such a drag never want to go anywhere do anything or Expand his world!
    and for what ever reason I met this guy at work and WE went to key west and miami aquarium stuff like this and I loved it we were the best of Friends and still are but out of Respect for my boyfriend*ex* I kept our day trippin to a mimumim!

  216. Gemini29 says:

    Sweety – (real quick before I head to bed) I’m still in the searching stages. One pot SD date next week, still talking with a few other pot SDs. We’ll see how it all turns out, I am extremely picky and determined to find the perfect SD. :)

  217. SugaCaneBby says:

    HELP!!! Chatting with a “SD” from Dallas who just got all frank with the sex part of all this. I asked him what he was looking for and he responded by saying he likes to keep things simple: He’d pay bills and give me gifts while I spoil his 8″ long, 3″ round “friend”.

    He completelty jumped the gun with that comment. How should I proceed?

  218. ginaZ says:

    Sweet dream Gemini!

    Kit-Kat…cloves of garlic keeps away e-stalkers 😉

    How is OC doing…come out come out wherever you are.

    Realistic I can see where you’re coming from, honesty is best I believe. And yes I suppose without sounding judgmental when a SB starts juggling multiple SD’s its walking a very fine line. Personally I prefer one SD, it’s less complicated. Though curious what your view is on a SB who is married or has a boyfriend? As far as a SD who has more than one SB? If someone were honest I would be more open to the idea. But either way I prefer to feel free enough to date, as it’s my hope to have a more traditional relationship.

  219. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Gemi~ I was there a long time ago, did you have some luck on here? I mean finding SDs?

  220. night Oc your a Class act as always!!

  221. Gemini29 says:

    ok girls I’m off to get my beauty sleep! Sweet sugar dreams to all!

  222. Gemini29 says:

    Sweety – Yeah, Ocean City is in MD, but I don’t live near it.

    Kit-Kat – Nope, not a Cali girl at all! Funny though, that made me smile!
    And your purses are going to ring in to the sweet tune of his name and a face-to-face meeting. lolol!

  223. Gemi I thought you were Orange County sugarbaby lol like in Cali!!
    I used to live up that Way in 2000 I kinda miss the beltway!!

  224. Realistic, I may aggree if you were talking a total provider. then no there is no need for a secondary SD.
    I cant see being unsafe in anylight
    and back to my poing Yes in Deed if you have my expenses all covered I cant See any reason why one cant be ready at a moments notice to Spoil YOU
    however as I was all upset this morning Some guys assume that they are Sd by giving someone a gas card… and I am not sure if this is just because of the area I live in or the economy or just plain stingyness
    maybe you all see why I am having a hell of a time!

    oh Gemi remember Kingpin? well he had re-emailed me and I must say his attitude was mighty reajusted, not much of a talker though, the last e-mail went like this, how much is your purses gonna cost me, to wich I replied, I still have to meet you first!
    after all he may not like my bowling skills*smiles*

  225. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Gemi~ yeah, I get that! I did some searches but…. Is maryland where ocean city is? Coz I’ve been there.. a while ago

  226. Gemini29 says:

    Not as much as I wished there were, but there are a few in DC. Actually I’m looking further out.

  227. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    ah! lots of SDs out your way?

  228. Gemini29 says:

    Maryland :)

  229. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Where are you From?

  230. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Gemi~ we have some, we also have a tunnel that you drive threw under water

  231. Gemini29 says:

    Sweety SB : Isn’t Montreal the place that has all the underground shopping centers, malls and walkways?

  232. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    RealisticSD~I think that one SD is enough, If I get all I want and need. I do think that having more than one SD would prove to be time consuming! If the SD had more than one SB, I would want to know. If he’s a married SD, how does he make the time to see all? Will he have enough time for me?
    In my opinion, all should be honest! How can you have a mutually rewarding relationship, if you lie? First, you need to be good at lying, which i’m not!
    I wish that I had the choice between SDs for sure… But , as some have said, it’s my location that makes it hard!
    Anyone wants an SB from Montreal???

  233. Gemini29 says:

    Ah crap. A sub can be a submissive PERSON, male or female. Sorry, need to proofread better.

  234. MarieSB says:

    RealisticSD- I agree I see where issues would arise for both parties. I was simply stating I have heard of SB’s having more then one. Like the girl interviewed on 20/20. Everyone is seeking something and if it works for them then go for it!

    I think if you ask out right…is there anyone else you should answer honestly and then explain how you feel about it.

  235. Gemini29 says:

    Lisa Marie- I think he is being too direct and caring about one thing only and not a connection with you or you as a person. Aren’t there sites for that? Also my question is…are you? If you are involved in the lifestyle and know your limits it *could* work, but if you are new…maybe steer clear?

    Kit-Kat – A sub is a submissive woman, normally in reference to a BDSM lifestyle.

  236. RealisticSD says:

    MarieSB, I can see why someone would want more than one SD at a time, but I personally have a problem with it for a number of reasons: First, if I am taking care of someone and giving her a very generous allowance to take care of all her needs and more, it is rather insulting to me for her to need another SD, as if I am not taking care of her well enough. Second, I want to feel needed in someone’s life, and if there are other SDs, then I am not really needed. Third, if she has a bunch of SDs, then come the STDs. Fourth, I provide for her so that she would have time for me when we are free; if there are other SDs, then her free time has to be divided, and conversely many of the times I can see her, she will have to cancel to accomodate her other SDs. That becomes a raw deal for my money. Fifth, having a bunch of SDs starts to wreak of prostitution–being intimate with a bunch of guys for cash.

    This brings up another issue pertinent to this specific blog which has to do with honesty. Do I expect the SB to be honest about other SDs she is involved with? Conversely, if it is not OK for a SB to have more than one SD for the reasons enumerated above, is it OK for an SD to have more than one SB if he provides for each of them according to their respective agreements? Is it necessary for the SD to disclose the presence of other SBs to each SB? I appreciate any opinions on this issue.

  237. A sub?? what does that mean?

    Nj lady Just use that Secondary to your Sugarfolks I say Everybody from now on who you meet in this arena need your Secondary.
    I put mine up often because it is a secondary!

  238. Lisa Marie says:

    Hey Sugars
    I just got an email from an SD. It just bluntly asked me ….”are you a sub”
    I know what he is asking….but what are your thoughts on this??

  239. NJLady says:

    Kit Kat, I have it where no one can see my last name, I even used a different last name..they asked for an additional email address but that was optional. What happens if a SD wants to send pictures of themselfs, should I just give hi the new account. Only my first name, (no additional info) is showing.

  240. ok Also do ont Connect the e-mail accounts either because I put in you e-mail and it Sends you Right over to face book hotmail… and Who knows else It also Sends everybody an invite to im!
    so What i am saying is if you decide to let someone look at your accounts Fine but do it because you want them to,
    thats just to head off the e-stalkers!

    Gina I heard using Whole Garlic cloves kills them… or is that somethingelse

  241. NJLady says:

    Alright, I took care of FB, only friends can see me, no one else, not even friends of friends. Thanks Kit Kat

  242. NJLady says:

    Okay, I’m going to get a hotmail account….should I use the name I have on the site, joybird or use NJLady or something different?

  243. NJLady says:

    Thank you MarieSB, ginaZ….I will take care of that ASAP

  244. nj lady right now put your privacy blocks on face book!! only my friends that I accept can see my things

  245. Nj lady if you truly like all of them then Good oy ya girl!!
    and put you a rainy day account in order Sugar dont sprinkle for ever!

    And besides we need to get a trip together us Regular girls in here!, can you imagine the street would burn up all us cuties out in public!

  246. hey ladys how is your Weekend going?
    I have my hair done now and my brows are done and I got my lashes on too! I look Quite cute if I do say so

  247. ginaZ says:

    NJLady, yes get another email addy. I made the mistake of sending my personal one and now have as kit-kat said, an “e stalker’

  248. ginaZ says:

    Not sure where everyone is? Sugar shopping perhaps?

    Oh my…On another site I began an exchange via email IM. I encountered a rather rude man. He gets off on spoiling rotten. OK. So we get to chatting and he wants to see what I look like. In a matter of ten minutes he reveals on one occasion he has his way with a naked woman on a fur coat and preceded to give her a bath in champagne. I tell him I must go ( my son was hungry) and that I would send photos upon my return. His reply. well you blew it he said. I make 10 million a year and you dare wait to send photos?

    Well after that little tantrum, I have no desire to send anything since I knew there was no way I even wished to meet. Rudeness is a HUGE turnoff, I don’t care how rich a man is if he behaves like a petulant child the red flag alert goes off.

    On a positive note my profile is orange now and I’ve begun to get some messages again.

  249. MarieSB says:

    NJlady- Yes get another e-mail and dont put any of your personal info on it….just to be on the safe side. And as far as liking more then one SD I have heard of some SB’s having more then one SD at a time. If it works out that way GO GIRL!!

  250. MarieSB says:

    Kit-Kat- I totally agree..I need more shoes HAHA

  251. NJLady says:

    Good evening Sugar’s….I think my confidence is starting to pay off….I started chatting with two more SD’s, not to mention the one who I was suppose to go out with last night, and anothter one who I think just wants to get me into bed…that’s why his fee is between 1-3k.

    And, yes SugarCaneBby, I will give him another chance. It was a coincidence that we might. He apparently was emailing me at the same time I sent him a message.

    My question, not to jump the gun, but what happens when you start communicating with one or more SD’s. Of course you meet and if you both hit it off, decide where to go from there. As anyone ever liked more than one of her SD”s?

    Also I read from some of about using a different email address. I didn’t occur to me until two SD’s gave me their email address so they could send me pictures. I wouldn’t be so concern, if it weren’t for the fact that he can find me on FB through it. Should I get another email address just for this site?

  252. gina I think good will is a great place but I am a plus size I almost have to shop in store, I like all sorts of stuff, an I really want a guy that, well *What am I telling you You know What I want*, gosh I would die for a Sd to call hey, kit-kat “I am in town this week can I get some of your Ribs. I cant find any as good as yours”,
    With me it is so not about money I feel like I do ok, but gee a few Splurges would be nice. I mean after all it is for his enjoyment as well as mine.

  253. ginaZ says:

    I probably will always shop at Goodwill even if I were filthy rich. Gotta love the bargains and treasure hunting! But yes a fantasy would be far more than this!

    The whole sugar phenom is an interesting departure for me. I’m independent and have always favored personal gifts to expensive ones. I’ve gone dutch, paid for a meal and been treated. Ideally I prefer to make my own money, and spoil someone as I would him.
    So in the context of sugar I’m still hoping to find a demonstrative SD.

  254. thanks RealSD I must go get my teasauraus for your vernacular but its not as hard as med-terminology so I think I got it!

    well I tend to run into You want money which is so preposterious!
    I have been owning a Check book with the same bank since I was 16
    I have only bounced 3 checks thus far and had overdraft protction at that.
    I just really hate a man That Expect to Come eat sleep and me eneertain him and he isnt supposed to help out a cent, I mean where did he think I got this new outfit from the Goodwill?

    and on that note if you look like lil orphan annie you only gonna get lil’ broke Andyes

    I try to Explain I buy a new outfit because We are going to be in public
    I want a nice handbag because , and I got some expensive shoes just for this occasion. how many times do you want me to Wear this! he want me to look nice but he want to be cheap on the helping me part!
    angry this just makes me angry!

    sorry ranting again

  255. RealisticSD says:

    Well, Kit-Kat, I totally agree. In pre-modern times, men were the bread-bringers, and so women naturally like men who not just bring bread home but who are generous and giving and willing to share with her and her family. Then came the twentieth century and dating, where a guy is supposed to provide some rather inexpensive food and/or entertainment and the woman is expected to reciprocate by providing whatever physical affection she feels comfortable with. But with her freedom from the bonds of marriage comes his freedom from financial or other responsibility, which is why a girlfriend provides the cheapest form or sexual satisfaction of all, as compared to a wife or mistress or sugar baby or prostitute. Yet, the girlfriend will still have that innate desire to be taken care of and provided for. But the actual complexities of not appearing overbearing or overly in love and of not feeling used financially make generous gift-giving to a girlfriend more complicated in reality. In my opinion, the worst are those totally modernized who like going Dutch, as that is totally unnatural, and at the end most women will despise it.

  256. ginaZ says:

    There are many version of needs on the part of a SB ReliasticSD, and I can understand and appreciate your generosity, while at the same time your reluctance to assist if the SB poofs, or uses you like an ATM. As a single mother and student my needs tend to be more basic, shelter, tuition and the occasional extravagance. Hopefully I will find ONE SD who will appreciate me and the reciprocity that goes beyond the financial.

  257. thats a Realistic way to look at it, as your name would imply!
    I have a Question for any of you SD
    Why is it that a man*who isnt a SD* cannot grasp that he may need to pay for things, not as if I am looking for money, but JUST that right there should say I am Picky I just dont want financial help I want to have a relationship of sorts also! I mean Really a little wordrobe Expense is too much!
    Who showed you the Sugar world and its Working??
    sorry for ranting!

  258. RealisticSD says:

    As for the issue of asking a SD for more, when SB’s come to me with sob stories and real needs, they arouse my charitable side (I love giving money to charity too), and I find it hard to say no. But it has to sound honest and not like they are just using me. The worst sugar baby is one that treats me like an ATM machine. They show up at random expecing money and poof! They’re gone till the next time their car breaks down and then they’re back with an exact price tag. My answer then is no. Plus, another thing is that if the SB is asking for more, I must be convinced that they have just one SD, otherwise it’s not really my problem, as her other SDs can pitch in.

  259. RealisticSD says:

    NYC SB, the problem with your busy sugar daddy is that if he is really as busy as he says, he will likely keep on having to reschedule meeting you. If he is giving you an allowance, he will feel that he is giving you something for nothing if he never sees you. Of course, he could have been lying and cancelling for other sugar babies, and in that case if he really liked you, his schedule will magically have more room and no sudden cancellations. It’s an odd thing to say, but for your sake I hope he was lying at first and now will have the time to see you and to make it work.

  260. I thought you were trying to get fly before you WENT out, now the drinks, I cant help on that, I like to buy patron when its on sale! but thats about all and IT last for months !! lol

  261. oh girl no disrespect at all I do hair too, but Hell if I like to do my own!!

  262. Miz_Red says:

    Oh no no!
    Im a Cosmotologist! Lol!
    I got my hair & all under wraps. I just have the set back of NO DRINKS that night! Lol. My nails need to be re-filled is all. But my concern is whether or not ill be able to really celebrate with my bestie =( Hopefully ill find a good date!
    Thanks for the tips!

  263. miz Red I am sure there is a Kid in the neighborhood that can do some slammin hair! and if your nails are off go to the 20’a set place!
    girl you gotta tip them nail ladys well *when ya got it* so they can do side work I got a good hairdresser phone number*we barter* I have a Eyebrow person *we barter* a kid hood dresser* I kinda let her do my hair really Edgy because I keep my du’s real good so I am like Advertizement , and I buy her stuff that she needs like SteelFlat irons and stuff like that She can grow her lil biz with!
    Red get creative not all people need money some are willing to Barter!

  264. Gemini29 says:

    *sigh* waiting for my profile to get re-approved…

    going to go do some chores in the meantime, hope all the sugars are having a fabulous day! :)

  265. Miz_Red says:

    Lol! *Gemini*…..that must kind of entertaining to discover.

  266. Gemini29 says:

    very true… I just enjoyed how he varied his age, his height, his wealth, his location and his commentary (what he was looking for) in a few of them. But yet used the same pictures for them…

  267. Miz_Red says:


    Im SO in a sucky situation!

    My best girl friends b-day is on the 26th…..plans changed just NOW, putting me in the position of needing money for the night. IM BROKE! & my friend/SD is unavailable to gift me with any allowance until AFTER her b-day! =( =( =(
    How did this happen!!!

    Hmmm…..who thinks I could find a date by the 26th who will get my nails done & buy me drinks all night? LOOOOLLLL! =)

  268. NYC SB says:

    I believe it is one profile one person gemi – but 4 profiles means 4 membership fees lol

  269. Gemini29 says:

    Hmmm…. how many profiles is one person allowed to have here? I just found a guy who has…FOUR!! I mean come on now.

  270. Miz_Red says:

    I lived there was I was very little, tho not as an adult.
    But when I have made short visits….I LOVED it!
    I can’t wait!

  271. NYC SB says:

    Miz Red – oh i really do love NYC… it is such a vibrant city… I love its “personality”… driven people/ always on the go/ the restaurants/ the culture… its AMAZING!

  272. NYC SB says:

    On an unrelated note…. I started talking to a very sweet pot in April… due to his commitments (he lives in another state and frequents NYC on business) we didnt meet until well last week!

    A legitimate SD with a high position job will have things pop up last minute. This man and I made plans 3 times and he kept on cancelling due to business obligations. For a while there I was skeptical and thought he was blowing me off. However, when we did meet he was the sweetest man ever. The meeting was last minute and all but it finally happened… at a Chevys (it was one of those “where are you? Im in Midtown… Me too! Lets grab a drink” kind of things). At the end of the date it became clear to me that he did in fact cherish our correspondence throughout the months. Long story short I will see him again…

    The point I am trying to make is to give each man its fair chance, within reason. My pot always cancelled a day in advance or even couple of hours in advance. As long as the guy just doesnt blow you off you should understand this…. after all we want someone who can provide for us. After all good things come to those who wait!

  273. Miz_Red says:

    Good morning NYC!

    Do u looooove NY?
    I need to relocate soon. . .& Im headed to NY!

  274. NYC SB says:

    Unique – I agree with OC! When the range is put up it usually includes everything (meals and plane tickets)… however, do bring it up to him if you are comfortable. Of course let him know how much you appreciate what you have received thus far.

    OC – how was surfing?

    I am getting ready to go shopping… NYC is beautuful today… sunny but not too hot… YAY… and I feel great… bye bye cold hello christian louboutin boutique… and champagne 😀

    I was supposed to go shopping on my own but a pot decided to call in last minute and offer to take me shopping… so YAY!!!!! I told him I was going shopping and he said “Why dont I join you?” … well now who am I to decline such a nice offer 😉

  275. Miz_Red says:

    Good morning OC! =)
    Its almost noon for me!

  276. Miz_Red says:

    Hey *Unique*- I would just accept what he gave you, [not to sound like a “gold digger”…said I said it…lol], but there is more where that came from. & u don’t want to risk losing what could be a really great thing. Don’t forget that the part about the allowance is based on “monthly”. He may be antisipating seeing u more that 1x a month, therefore, his intensions may be to give u more the next time he sees u. Hope I helped!

    xo- Red

  277. Unique SB says:

    Good morning all! I am in desperate need of advise:) I am relatively new to this site and do not think I am the traditional SB. I am married and 36. Not to sound obnoxious but I am very attractive, funny and smart! I came on this site to find someone real, fill in some areas that are lacking in my marriage and at the same time need extra money to send my daughter to college. I found a great guy several states away. He immediately wired me $ and I flew out to meet him. He is very well off, several mil a year. In his profile it said allowance of 5K-10K. Being new, I was impressed that he sent me $ without even meeting, it ended up that we hit it off fantastic. The first meeting he put me in a $800 room and gave me $3500. Now being that Im married and have to fly to him, we are only meeting once a month. We met a second time and he gave me around $3k. Here is my ?, I like him alot, its a perfect no strings relationship, I really needed the 5K and I do not want more than one SD. He is perfect! Do I risk it by asking for more? or do I just accept what he gives me each time?

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      Good Morning Unique SB: Your question is one that many have had before you. Take into account the profile category is just a “range” it has many facets(airfare, meals, allowance). He may very well be in the 5K range with all of that. Have you considered just talking to him about your financial needs? It might be a good idea to broach the subject and be honest but at the same time let him know that you have had a difficult time bringing this up. Make sure you then stop and truly listen to what he has to say. I may be right in my statement above and he may already be in the range you are hoping for.
      We are glad you could join us! Smart, very attractive and funny runs rampant here on the blog, you will fit right in. ~OC

  278. Kay be and all be back tomorrow night sugars

  279. I hear that a gentlemen would at least respond

  280. SugaCaneBby says:

    Oh. My. God. The Seeking Arrangement book is the BEST. It should be a requirement for EVERY person who joins this site to read it (especially these confused SD’s who think sex is the name of the game). I don’t get why they freak out when they come across an escort but then that’s pretty much what they want…

    Interesting day at work today. Shoplifters. Want to report my co-workers for racial profiling (wtf, you STOLE! That’s why you got followed you fake Latino claiming white tricks!) to corporate. Luckily I wasn’t there because I vowed to punch the next woman who tried to shoplift during my shift in the face.

    NJLady – YES give him another chance! Ish happens! It’s only when he continuously cancels and fails to apologize that you should move on.

    And jeez, I wish I was getting some kind of response to my profile, even if it’s negative. 😉 It would let me know I’m on the map at least.

  281. I need something positive for sure

  282. wigs can be fun i was in hair biz we had a blast

  283. ginaZ says:

    Rare gem, there are some wonderful SD’s on here, and some are looking for a more well rounded gal, not Barbie. I’ve had great luck in the past, and have met someone who I had a sugar weekend with, though sadly not for the long term. BUT, yes there are wonderful gents, but many are looking for strictly arm candy, which is fine but it is what it is. It just takes a bit longer to find someone.

    I plan on joining a more traditional site as well though. As I’d love to find love. But sugar is good to 😉

  284. I saw it is disgusting personally I like something less barbie more real connection

  285. hey gina I am sorry you have an E-stalker!!
    RRGG where you been at lady?
    and me too I keep Reading Only Blondes apply, and I think so if I put on my blond wig do I count, hehehehehehe

  286. Good call Gina I hate to say but I have only heard of a few women being successful here?

  287. ginaZ says:

    Oh goodness the married SD, the one whose wife called me, the one who got drunk and acted like a class A jerk. Drama. Run girls run! Plus…I never even met him.

    So he keeps following me, trying to be my facebook friend, trying to follow my tweets on twitter.

    So the moral of the story: Please use an alternate email. My bad. I’ve blocked him, but he’s delusional apparently.


  288. ginaZ says:

    Gem, honest, loving and kind are wonderful and seem like more of what one would emphasize on a regular dating site, but don’t lose heart! There are so many factors thrown into the mix in Sugarville. When and if and how to manifest a SD/SB relationship. There is much waiting, sometimes months. I have noticed MANY more SB’s since the 20/20 newscast. Models, and playmates, 18 year olds, bikini clad, some rather suggestive profile shots of young women in rather provocative poses.

    I’m still hopeful as you should be as well 😉

  289. ginaZ says:

    Ah yes the ole’ trusted google genie.

    I do respect a pot need for privacy as I would hope they would mine. And often first and last names may come up when it becomes more likely that you will meet someone. Honestly I wouldn’t want someone to know where I live!

    Ok but let’s say the pot sends an email or calls you, and there is a bit of a trail. Yes I respect and would never abuse someones privacy but I am a bit of a sleuth by default.

    True story: This is at the beginning of SA, pot calls, we chat once twice, I’m beginning to think he may not be for real. He is married with children lives in NY. I was going to visit him perhaps and he was to wire some money to my account. Well that never happened. When he calls I overheard the business name, did a bit of searching connecting only his first name and found him. Yes he was legit, income, business and so forth, but there is a site where customers can leave feedback. Ha! There were a few rather negative comments. Like owner was rude, a douchebag. These were my feelings but were affirmed by strangers!

    So glad I never went. But even those that try to be careful should maybe be more careful. Especially if they are married and have children. I’m protective of this but someone else may not be.

  290. hi all I personally have been honest , loving, kind and not finding the real men?

  291. Lisa Marie says:

    ok no one..later then friends just got here

  292. Lisa Marie says:

    evening sugars just poppin inbefore I go out tonight

  293. Gemini29 says:

    Gina, I see a lot of profiles here with that kind of comment on it. Its like “ohhkaaaay…then why are you HERE?”

    NYC SB – oh that’s a bit freaky! (how in the world did you get the name of his business partner and his first company?? did you google too or did it come up in a chat?)

  294. lol mini maidoff!! hahahahah

  295. NYC SB says:

    Some people are hopeless…

    My mini Madoff is someone I had met already… I had googled him before and nothing came up… but when I googled his business partner and his first company then everything came up

  296. ginaZ says:

    Just popped in.

    Side line comment: On occasion i peruse the ads from the ladies just out of curiosity and
    I wonder sometimes. One girl. 18 according to the profile but she looks about 12, plus she lists bachelor degree. Hu? Or the other profile, again 18, divorced, she looks like she’s old enough to be other girls mother and shes wearing about as little as one could get away with on here.

    So the thread is about “lies” how many of theses profiles are actually true? Or are escorts or worse?

    Random comment from pot SD in L.A. Paraphrased from a different site. Well really you can get casual sex anywhere in this city (L.A) I don’t need to be a sugar daddy.

  297. Gemini29 says:

    Not much, boring friday night. This is only like the 45th boring friday night in a row. I seriously need a few pot SD dates (or a real SDaddaaay) to shake things up a bit!

  298. oh no gemi I had to show him the goodies! dummy! he dosent know better!
    hey whats going on over your way anyway?

  299. Gemini29 says:

    Kit-Kat – Give him the number of an escort business in his area and call it a day. 😉

    Netty- Welcome! Oooh I gotta say, any girl who uses the word “cyanobacterium” is awesome in my book.* And probably a fair share of SDs too!

    *Going to go look it up now. O:-)

    I was a lurker too for a very long time, I hope you join in more often! A fresh voice is always welcome here! :)

  300. hey yall how are yall doing? I thought Id tell you guys about my day,
    glad I got this book It was helpful to be able to Site something in Reference!

  301. hey yall I just had To Dress down an Idiot… hold on I remembered SF SD and NYC what you guys said so I gave him a chance!
    His E-mail went like this! Show me the Goodies and We will see!

    I say to him I am not a pay for play type or Escort, I am taken aback by your Goodies comment. However I will give you another shot at it
    Gave e-mail the yahhh one*secondary of course*

    Writes me back
    You not into sex for my money you are confused!

    I write him Exactly what a prostitute/call girl/escort/agency/hooker does
    and I pose the Question would you take a Hooker to a NASCAR race with you?
    Would a ESCORT stick around to see if youve eaten more then Ramen noodles? Hell no!
    so Sir I am not the one Who is confused about an Arrangment.

  302. Netty says:

    hey sugars

    I’m new to this whole sd/sb deal . I’ve been thinking about it and lurking around for a while though. you sbin the states seem to have a lot more options then us in the great white north, just searching around sure you get lots of results in a search but to find people near you can take a while. glad i recently moved to closer to a major city here. But yea, i just thought i’d say something for once instead of just being a blog lurker like normal.

    might pop on again in a bit and see who is around but for now i have to go and clean my fish tank… my coral look fuzzy through the glass today its water change time. stupid cyanobacterium….

    later days.

  303. NJLady says:

    I did hear from him….after I turned my phone back on, after having it off for 3 hours ago…..I called him and he apologized, he said he was busy with meetings….it happens. I do feel a little better knowing he did call. Soooo…what do you think? Give him another chance….He did seemed interested….if he calls….I’ll make him sweat….lol I will proceed with caution!

    To: NeOhio SB, SF SD, Gemini29….I Appreciate the shoulder,(s)

  304. Gemini29 says:

    Oh NJLady, that’s too bad. But as SF SD said, that reflects poorly on the SD not at all on you.

    NYC SB – oh…dear! that’s not good at all! is this someone you’ve already met or just in the emailing stages?

  305. SF SD says:

    NJ – So sorry to hear you got stood up. The fact that the guy flaked says something about him, but not about you. You’ve got the right attitude. It can be tough to dust yourself off and take another shot. But confidence is sexy, and it sounds like you’ve got what it takes.

    SF SD

  306. NeOhio SB says:

    Ive got a great pot SD flying west coast to visit me on Sunday. Will update as to how that transpires. Should get some insight from OCSB and G on their knowledge of the west coast flakes or good ones. But absolutely without a doubt tending to believe this one may be a keeper.

  307. NeOhio SB says:

    NJLady: Its HIS loss, not yours. Always be an SB with an attitude…nothing less. Thats the only way i can and will ever be. Lurking in these waters is another one who WILL appreciate you for the quality woman you are…..nothing less.

  308. NJLady says:

    Good Evening Sugar’s,
    I wish I had some good news to tell….but I don’t….I’ve been Stood Up!
    I called him this afternoon, left a message, sent an email to confirm for tonight….Nothing! And I saw him online ealier. When he sent this meeting up, he wrote he would meet me for a couple of hours because he had dinner plan..”business”. Something tells me he had a date and wasn’t man enough to say anything. Not to worry…I through myself back into SB 1st gear and starting writing to people…..I’m thinking, maybe I should name my price…..might be taken a little bit more seriously….what do you think?…..don’t let the smile fool you….I’m a SB with an attitude!

  309. Miz_Red says:

    Good evening Ladies & Gents!

    Anything interesting going on here today?

  310. NYC SB says:

    Oh boy – so I just googled a pot… and my oh my… the guy has more scheme and fraud law suits against him than… well he gives madoff a run for his money….

  311. sfsd I see your back,
    thankyou for the complements NYC gave me that name!
    and it is representitive may have to change the profile

  312. SF SD says:

    Have fun, OC! Will you bring me some light bulbs?

  313. NYC SB says:

    oooo cougar OC – hahahaha FUN!

    Be safe and dont hurt yourself!

  314. Gemini29 says:

    There’s a profile of a SD near me with only pictures of his bare ass (ok one is a side shot of his bare flank, but there is a total bare butt shot in there too)

    I feel as though the displaying your bare tush photos privilege goes away after you turn 1 year old. 😀

  315. NYC SB says:

    gemi – i prefer the boat picture 😉

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      I am a sucker for “Guy with a Labrador” picture …

      • OCSugarbaby says:

        Have a good evening everyone! I am off for my surfing lesson adventure. NYC SB: I will take a picture of “Duce” (seriously that is the instructors name). He is so cute and maybe 21, if that! Ta!

  316. Gemini29 says:

    I’m just kind of sick of the stock photos that a notice a lot of SDs use. Like…guy with tux. Guy with suit. CAR! (oh, you’re a vehicle, how nice)

  317. NC Gent says:

    Yes NYC SB, but it certainly should launch your career one would think! but i don’t know for sure :)

  318. NYC SB says:

    NC Gent – VS does not pay that well for appearing in their catalog unless you are one of their main angels … dont ask how i know…

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      Kit-Kat: The picture of Johnny was more 21 Jump Street meets the Red Carpet pose with shades on. Still I was sad he never returned my email. I bet he has already found Taylor ~sigh

      NC: They are my favorite candy bar too! I use to tell my little nieces at Halloween that if they had them in their trick-or-treat candy to save them for me. I was so naughty, I actually told them that they tasted like brussel sprouts. Well that only worked once, curious little devils. But you should have seen their faces when they tried one for the first time. Priceless!

  319. NC Gent says:

    Well not that we are talking fake pics…. I have seen more than one profile that had VS website pics – surprises me how many Victoria Secret models are looking for SBs — one might think they would be able to support themselves if they were good enough for the VS catalog 😉

  320. NYC SB says:

    There was one man with George Clooney pic on here… as he said he looked like him… needless to say when I met him it was not Geoirge Clooney… not by a long shot

  321. NC Gent says:

    Thanks Kit-Kat — I’ve been known to be gentlemanly on occasion, especially when motivated by the potential for sex lol (jokingly).

    p.s. Kit-Kat is my favorite candy bar :)

  322. OC was it 21jumpstreet johonny Edward sisscor hands or Pirates of the carriabeann jhonny?

  323. WITSEC, you have to sift, there is a guy on here I looked at his photos and Whoopi goldberg is in one and George Stephanopolos is Clearly in the other! I feel like Tweeting Sherri sheppard about Whoppi’s image on his photo*its not a professional picture* but I am sure She wouldnt want to be on this site With out an endorsment
    of course Iam Speculating!
    and I am positive George’s wife would not be too tickled his photo is on here At all!

  324. Chapter 8 is good lots of ideas about SD outin the open!!
    and chapter 11 I like that stuff most anybody with a eye for details can figure out but still good!!

  325. hey Suga bye suga umm about the Book I wont get too loud but it has good lingo in it!!

  326. WITSEC says:

    “OCSugarbaby says:
    September 18, 2009 at 11:37 am

    Ah… Found it and you are right. I will sent it to SA for them to review. Thanks WITSEC”

    How about a 29 y.o. from Las Vegas using little Taylor Swifts’s fotos in her ad?

    There has to be a better was to monitor the use of someone else’s (probably) copyrighted pictures in their profiles other than just rubber stamping their submission.

  327. NC well arent you nice to include the Regulars in here as “WE” Gentelman points for the man!!

    yes lucy Read read Read! and Welcome, think of it as backround info!! maybe start with August archives then go into sept, but as far back as you can take it!! the better armed you will be When you Sugar daddy comes along!

  328. NC Gent says:

    Hi Lucy – welcome to the site. We highly recommend you peruse the old blogs. There is a wealth of information in them :)

  329. SugaCaneBby says:

    Was searching last night before deciding to go to bed and I was suprised to come across the profiles of men who were upfront about being overweight and barring blondes from contacting them! Odd.

    Read a little bit of the book last night. So far, I haven’t come across anything I didn’t know intrinsically. I’ll be reading more on my commute to work.

    Speaking of which, gotta go get ready for that. Later all!

  330. Lucy says:

    Hey, I am new to this site any ideas to get me started.

  331. Sugar baby and the 3 pots!!/ the three little Sugarbabies/ten little Sugarbabies Hows those for titles?
    moral of the Stories, a Sure fire way to Burn a SD,Bridge
    ok I am getting on my comedianne hat again!

  332. YO gina “The End” that was a classic Fairy tale you should writ one of those up Maybe stepnan will post it! lol

  333. ginaZ says:

    Gemini…Oh yes that’s a big turn off, and it’s happened to me on a first meet. It zaps any possibility of interest from my side. This is also why I prefer meeting for lunch or dinner.

    First Sugar date. Not so good. A 46 year old, oh whoops I mean 62 year old pot SD.

    Pot SD answers every phone call like a robot, talks for minutes on end, rolls eyes. He’s conducting his business at Starbucks. Arguing on the phone with a client. And then at the conclusion of our meet wants to know if he can drive me to my car parked one block away.

    The end.

  334. ginaZ says:

    Katrina I’m lovin’ the new handle “kit-kat” 😉

    So I finally upgrade and wouldn’t you know the site is down (search features and so on)
    Jaz some SD’s well yes that’s what they want, strictly arm candy or have very specific age requirements or even that they prefer someone who plays dumb. But many prefer and seek out someone more well rounded, someone older, or more educated, a different body type, or some less “plastic.” I live in LA the land of plastic and Barbie, though maybe I stand out as I’m unaltered. As far as behavior, I think what works best is to be ones self.

  335. Gemini29 says:

    And the only way I think a SD would hope you would behave would be in a nice, respectful and courteous manner.

    I once saw a girl on a date with a guy….I couldn’t take my eyes away from them, it was like a trainwreck…the girl was on her phone THE ENTIRE TIME and the guy was sitting there looking so bored and annoyed. Rudeness and discourtesy is never appreciated.

  336. Gemini29 says:

    Jaz – Yes. You need to follow the SB rules and regs for behavior and looks or otherwise you are dooooooooooooooomed never to find a SD.


    Nooooo….there’s a post a few back about this subject…plus its always great to read the archives for some great hints and tips.

  337. it depends jaz just like in a regular dating situation men like legs, like Thick laides, like thin ladies,
    Its all eye of beholder! this is why you will contuninely see the word Chemestry*sp* if he isnt/she isnt what you would look at twice it wont work!

  338. Jaz says:

    Hi everyone, I have a questions. Do all SD expect you to behave in a certain way or have the barbie doll appearance?
    …And thanks OC for replying to my post in the other thread :)

  339. I am glad you pup is good!

  340. photogirl says:

    Katrina, thanks… It went better than I had hoped for :) and my lab got taken care of too!

  341. hey photo i was wondering what happened to you

  342. Gemini29 says:

    I have the frilly apron, now I just need the CL’s! lolol

    oh and a SD, my bad.

  343. Lisa Marie says:

    ok, I shouldnt be thiking of 6 pack abs and food and CLs and surfer gusy right now….not where i am right now ha ha.

  344. photogirl says:

    Good afternoon everyone!

    Have been gone for the last day and half enjoying $weet company. :)

    Now to play catch-up on the blog, you all have been very busy in here!

  345. NYC SB says:

    GinaZ – oh yes… i lust over him… he unfortunately never replied to my email :(

  346. NYC SB says:

    now im craving brownies… and 6 pack abs… and surfers… ay vey whats happening to me????

  347. YO gina!! I like that idea girl that would be funny I think Id loose my mind on the west coast though!

  348. I think I love this one Its a brown sweety just like me I am going to keep this one!!

  349. I make a mean cheesecake, but yall know I can cook
    OH NYC I have something for you too!! hold on a sec

  350. ginaZ says:

    NYCSB Plenty of surfers in SoCal! Mr 6 pack looked mighty fine, 5’10” as I recall, NYC. 3-5 or 5-10 allowance.

    Now if only I had a pair of CL I could entertain the fantasy, as I do like to cook. The trouble is my feet aren’t narrow ;(

    Maybe we should do a sugar switch town reality show. A SB from L.a switches with her SB sister in New York?

  351. Lisa Marie says:

    mmmm I want some White Chocolate! Love those….I make really good brownies…I make a killer Chocolate Creme Pie. But I have never made White Chocolate brownies. mmm yummy

  352. NYC SB says:

    DEAL OC! what kind of brownies you like? Fudge, caramel, white chocolate, turtle nut, peanut butter, coconut???

  353. NYC SB says:

    ps. gemi — all sds love baked goods… especially if you bake in nothing but an apron and CL’s :)

  354. NYC SB says:

    Gemi and NYC SB – the brownie bake off… now thats sugary sweet

  355. NYC SB says:

    aww oc… the simple things in life… my endearing moment was when my sd came over with a VS bag and I was expecting to find sexy outfits (no complaints on my part) but instead I found boy shorts, tank tops and lounge pants… he said they are for comfort when we are lounging around watching family guy… another one was when i had a migrane and he brought me a cucumber wrapped in gift paper… i didnt know what to think… he put it in the freezer and then applied it to my forehead… beyond sweet…

    PS… I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE surfer guys … they are just so yummy… not many of them around my area :(

  356. Gemini29 says:

    Awww OC that’s so cool! Lightbulbs…I’ll have to remember that 😉

    Actually that is a great point to make….small gifts that show you are paying attention to them versus big gifts with no meaning are always the ones that tend to win guys over I think.

    Do any SDs still like baked goods? I can make a mean brownie! 😀

  357. Flo Rida says:


    Disclaimer: All advice is a personal opinion only and to be followed (or not) at own risk.

    Just wanted to comment on the “disclosure of name”, “saying no” and “travel to a different city” comments that have popped up.

    Firstly, important SDs value discretion, wise SBs value safety and chemistry. If a SD is the real deal he would not want to disclose his real identity to someone he hardly knows, in fact if he does then he’s either foolish, not that important, or not rich.

    If a SB get’s a name we’ll find out where he lives, whom he works with, find out if he appears on the internet, find out if he has a criminal record etc. At a meeting he can prove where he lives, whom he works with and his professional standing by 1) the way he acts (suit, clothes, watch, manicure, shoes, the car he drives, how he tips, his knowledge of wine and fine cuisine) and 2) With evidence that protects his identity (name badge or business card covered, tax return with name and SSN redacted, back statement with name and address redacted). I’ve even had a SD take me to the ATM to show me his bank account balance (albeit he could be a drug smuggler).

    I think NYC SB and SF SD are saying “Why close a door so early when you have the option of closing the door later”. I work in sales and frankly get hit on all the time and their eyes gravitate to my boobs, but anyway back to subject, we have a saying which is “The sale that isn’t made is the one where someone says no”. Always preserve option value, don’t say no, say “Look, I appreciate you taking time off work to see me and I really am worth it, I can see you like direct talk and while some ladies might like your wit and directness, I ASSURE you that nothing is going to happen without chemistry, so PLEASE ease of the sales talk and be a gentlemen, good things come to good people, but a bad guy will get nothing”. Having said that the guy being described was a complete arse (I was born in England), but that complete arse needs to be “managed”.

    Finally “travel to a different city”, I travel all the time for my job, by car by plane so I’m comfortable with travel. If you’re traveling to a different city get met at the airport by a friend, have an exit strategy (ie as L’amant Imaginaire says route home – great tag line btw), always meet in public, always have alternative place to stay. The blog seems to be an informal network and maybe SBs will look after each other in different cities(?).

    Anyway rant over, hormones under control! Back to work.

  358. Lisa Marie says:

    Yes i knwo I can tell by your name where you are too….but in general its cool. I have visited there when I was younger. But never got to see the beaches.

  359. Lisa Marie says:

    hmm I can guess where you are OCSugar. I wanna go…Always wanted to Surf. Have fun!!!

    i cant wait for this work day to be over!

  360. Lisa Marie says:

    wow NYC you actually had a SD bluntly come at you like that? Creepy

  361. NYC SB says:

    Hi OC! Getting ready for the weekend?

    maybe we should hook her up with a man who emailed me “when can you come over” … this is the first email mind you… my reply “when I become an escort (aka never)”


  362. NYC SB says:

    WITSEC – too funny! most people arent that bright 😉

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      Morning Sunshine (NYC SB)… Taking her down may be a drop in a very large bucket. 😉

      • OCSugarbaby says:

        NYC SB: I am geared up and ready for the weekend! I have my first Surfing lesson today after work. Super excited about that. I have wanted to do this since I move out here. Plus I heard the instructors are HOT.

      • OCSugarbaby says:

        Ok Kit Kat, I did not forget your blog questions (to the SB’s and SD’s) from yesterday. I will answer them now.
        What did you do For a sugar daddy that Knocked his socks off?
        not talking sexually, but What really Endeared your SD to you?

        “What did you do For a sugar daddy that Knocked his socks off?(Not talking sexually)”
        “What really Endeared your SD to you?”

        I think that it was the “Ah Ha” moments that really endeared him to me. The plain fact that I am a real girl and exactly who I said I was prior to meeting.
        Once I brought him Light bulbs and a case of bottled water. He traveled all the time and his corporate apartment had four burnt out lamps and nothing in the fridge. Middle of the night, looking for something to drink and only finding Scotch or wine prompted the gift. He was blown away that I would be so thoughtful. I may have been with the light bulbs but the water was for ME!
        I felt immediately endeared to him when he emailed me after our first meeting and mentioned ever so sweetly that he wanted to take care of setting up my allowance directly into my account and then emailed me to let me know it was done. Endearing to me is a person who is thoughtful and caring. He and I remain friends and have moved on as things change in the sugar world. I wish I could have cloned him! 😉

  363. WITSEC says:

    Good day:

    I am a Lurker, but saw something this morning I wanted to share:

    if you are going to use pictures in your brand new, San Diego sugarbby profile, try not to use the same ones you use for your Eros escort ad. The pictures are water stamped, and if you are attempting to attract a daddy, using your escort pictures will not pass muster.

    Curious as to how these pics could be approved by management team that does not want this site to become an advertising venue for prostitution.

  364. NYC SB says:

    Kaalii – thats pretty much what i was trying to say as well… im not as articulate when my head feels like a 1000 lbs…

    GinaZ – i do not see mr 6 pack… :(

  365. SF SD says:

    > Vixen – “Kaalii…Just let him know where you stand up front before he takes the trip to meet you….Take your time and decide is he really worth the meeting…”

    Quite right. My little rant was just that. You’re the one who’s actually communicating with your potential SD. The bottom line is make sure there’s a clear understanding before the meeting and that you’re both comfortable with it. Good luck!

  366. Lisa Marie says:

    good mornng sugars!

  367. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Looks like we are playing a game of Scrabble here: Sugar edition!
    I am having an art opening tonight and it’s chaos around here, so I escaped the madness for a bit to see what the blog world is up to!!!!
    I don’t have much time to post just these past few days I’ve been able to type and post some commentary on these entries and have tried to join in on discussion but I would love to keep in touch with people who lurk or who don’t lurk so please email me via my private address am more than happy to write back, answer questions, teach you some dirty jokes for parties and business dinners, and be a confidant to so many who like me have to keep their sugar lives a secret.

    Au Revoir Sugar World

    L’amant Imaginaire

    voulevous91 at the mail that is hot

  368. NeOhio SB says:

    Suthern: You are absolutely correct…it is “eudemonics”

  369. SuthernExec says:

    I think the word is “eudemonics” or alternatively, “eudaemonics”.

  370. NeOhio SB says:

    And a happy Friday to all of the SBs and SDs in the blog!!

  371. NeOhio SB says:

    NC Gent: Very well said. I seek nothing less than the combination of intellectual, emotional and physical stimulation in the same package. Just can’t go there and refuse to compromise for anything less…There has to be that chemistry, the desire, the lust, the craving, wanting, needing to enjoy quality moments together………Respect, trust always key elements.

  372. NC Gent says:

    Hi Nicki — welcome to the blog. Although I appreciate your honesty, the true sugar world isn’t about being in arrangements with someone to whom you aren’t attracted. There are other web sites for that. I am glad you found someone that you find attractive. I do recognize that there are many things besides physical attributes that can make someone attractive/unattractive to the beholder. Best wishes in your adventures!

  373. NC Gent says:

    Maybe you meant eudomonics?

  374. NC Gent says:

    Hey Happy Lurker — I always like to learn new words so I looked up endemonic on several thesaurus and dictionary sites and I couldn’t find it – maybe that is why it is a little-used word? Is the spelling right? Thanks not trying to be a douchebag – just curious.

  375. Happy Lurker says:

    “Endemonic” is a little-used word that means “happy-making”.
    What are all the endemonic activities you can think of ? Make a list.
    How many of these happy-makers did you do yesterday, last week, this year ? Which ones can you indulge in today ? When you are facing a challenge, ask what would make you happy in this situation.
    And cast a wide net. You may have “snaring an SD” on your list, but if you also remember that “shopping spree” and “playing with my labrador retriever” are endemonic for you, you get to be happy every day – and that’s important. Especially keeping on your high heels in bed and/or your socks, or that iron chastity harness and the strapless bra that does not get off ? Lol !
    What would make you happy now (that wouldn’t make you unhappy later). Do that !
    To set a good example, I will change my name into Endemonic Lurker.
    For sooth, it might be endemonic for you to send me a mail.
    Am sure it brightens up your day !

  376. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Hi Sydney, I live in Europe as well.
    I have made the mistake of meeting someone who didn’t live in the same country as I did on a first date and it was not a smart choice. Nothing happened to me thank goodness, but I know that it’s something I’d never do again and I didn’t forego an arrangement with the guy I met. In my current arrangement my SD met me in my own country (he comes here for business) and we had a drink in a discreet and safe place. I don’t recommend jet setting off with someone but if you get invited to travel to another city or country for a first meeting take precautions:

    a) let a friend know where you are going or if you don’t have anyone to tell, let someone here on the blog know
    b) make sure you have your mobile phone charged and that it gets service
    c) make sure you have a return ticket that you can leave at anytime you feel unsafe or unsure
    d) keep a small cushion of money with you just in case, Iike 100 quid or so.

    Being in Europe I can offer to help answer any questions in private if you scroll up the blog you might find my email address but if you would like to send me a message feel free and or I can leave it again (voulevous91 at mail that is hot) and there are lots of sweet people who can give you there take on things as well, so you’re in good hands and welcome.


  377. Sydney xx says:

    Hey everyone!!

    I just wanted to say hi… I’m completely new to this and could do with any advice going?!

    It’s such an interesting scene… but I’m really struggling to find someone both genuine and someone who I’m attracted to!

    I seem to be getting mainly American guys messaging me, whereas I live in London… Getting lots of offers for flights and holidays but obviously saftey is key?!

    Have any of you girls jetted off with your SD on a first meeting??


  378. Happy Lurker says:

    Hi Nicky,
    Your observations are so right !
    Also read “How to negotiate with a Sugar Daddy”. You will find it under the heading “Pages” on the right hand side of the opening page of the blog.
    Quote: “it is a type op play in which an SB can bring an SD to believe that she’s genuinely interested in and attracted to him”.
    It ties up with the opening lines of Sugar Sonnet 138.

  379. Nicki says:

    Hey SugarCanBby and everyone! I agree. I changed my “sexy” photo to a face one, and got almost no responses. I changed it back to the one that shows some cleavage, and the emails started coming again. Unfortunately, that’s just the way it is.

    I guess one of the biggest lies in Sugarland is on SBs side… I hope this does not offend anyone, but I know I did this before, so I will say it… We tend to tell a SD that we find him attractive, or he looks young, or he is in “great shape” or whatever… When in real life we would not even look at them. Maybe not all of you do it, but I have gone on dates with two SDs who I was not attracted to, but pretended to be… Then I never carried through to the arrangement, because I knew there was no chemistry.

    Luckily, the one who I’ve just started talking to is very attractive, so I don’t have that problem. :)

    Oh, and I can vouch for the Seeking Arrangement book! It’s really good!

  380. MarieSB says:

    Quick update before I am off to bed (had sushi and saki tonight!!)

    So “package” pic SD was a flake haha! I do however have my first date with a certain pot SD who I think could be promising! We are having lunch! I hope it turns out well!

    That’s all I had! Have a good night lovelies!

  381. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    SCBby~ yeah that sounds like a good book to have

  382. SugaCaneBby says:

    Sweety SB – It’s the one the founder of this website wrote. It’s an accompanying guide with some tips and tricks to help navigate some pitfalls of the lifestyle and give more insight into it. Just thought I’d like to have it on hand.

  383. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    SCBby~ what seeking arrangement book?

  384. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    I had one guy say to me that he wanted to meet once a week at his downtown apartment for 5k a month. He only wanted sex and maybe some talk. He didn’t want to give me his name, or what he did or even a pic. I figure ok i get that you want to be discreet lets meet for coffee and he didn’t want too… he only wanted to meet at his apartment. I told him about my safety and stuff and he refused! so I didn’t meet him. I can understand discretion but sometimes…. it’s hard to trust when you know nothing!
    just make sure you are comfortable and safe, like SF SD said tell a friend where you are and ask her to call or text you make sure your ok!
    Be safe!

  385. SugaCaneBby says:

    The Seeking Arrangment Book. 😉

  386. Vixen says:

    Kaali whatever you do, don’t let the allowance offer get in the way of making the right decision.

  387. Vixen says:

    Kaali-I’m with NYC SB on this one. Just let him know where you stand up front before he takes the trip to meet you. If you don’t plan on giving him what he wants, state so immediately. After that its up to him to determine whether he’ll still come or not. Take your time and decide is he really worth the meeting? Outside of that one conversation how has he treated you otherwise? Some men will try to get away with whatever they can until you put them in their place. After that, you might just find them to be a gentleman once they understand exactly what you will and will not accept.

  388. SF SD says:

    Okay, a couple of thoughts on a few things that have scrolled by in the last few hours. First a “me, too” with regard to the disclaimer on advice. We’re all offering what we think are helpful suggestions, based on our own perspectives and experiences. Likewise, it’s up to each of us to choose the advice that we think fits our own situations. This applies to anything I say as well.

    So, here’s my comment on the giving out names thing. Personally, I would not give out my last name in advance of a first meeting. Discretion is that important to me. I know of at least one other SD who posts here and feels the same way. NYC SB makes a good point as well. There are wealthy or prominent people in the places she frequents who could be maliciously exposed or blackmailed by a potential SB. (This *has* happened). Now, I suppose you could press me on this issue, and I could just as easily give you a phony last name, except that I don’t do that kind of stuff.

    However, a first meeting for me is a coffee or lunch date, in a public place, with no money exchanged (except perhaps as a token gift) and no expectation that anything will happen afterward, except thinking about how things went and whether we’d like to meet again. If you, as a potential SB, were to meet me, the best thing to do would be to follow the precautions for meeting anybody from the Internet for the first time — meet in a public place, have your own transportation, let a friend know where you’re going, and arrange to check in with your friend at a predetermined time to make sure everything is okay.

    In Kallii’s situation there were some red flags, for sure. The guy offered a large amount of money up front, sight unseen. He wanted sex the first time out. He used the money and the “inconvenience” of traveling to lay a guilt trip on you. And he was pushy and demanding in his messages. If I had to guess, the most likely outcome would have been that he flaked, or you would have “given it up” and received a small fraction of what he originally promised you. So the general advice to trust your instincts and not do anything that makes you uncomfortable made a lot of sense here.

    So, should you ask for a last name and check someone out? Definitely, before you make any kind of commitment or put yourself in a potentially vulnerable situation. Before I make an arrangement my SB is going to know enough about me to satisfy herself that I am who I say I am. And she’ll know the results of my medical tests as well. I’m going to do some checking, too. Exactly when this happens could vary with the person and the situation.

    A lot of folks here have guidelines that work for them, and I’m not suggesting that anybody else’s feelings or experiences are wrong. I’m just explaining what my own sensitivities are and suggesting that not every situation is exactly the same.

    BTW, for the newer folks here, SuthrnExec has already posted a great blog called “How to Identify a Fake Sugar Daddy.” To find it, Google the words “sugar daddy blog fake sd” and it will be the first entry that comes up.

    Sweet dreams, sugarland.

  389. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    SCBby~ what book?

  390. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Hey SCB~ yeah i got a guy ask me for bootie calls so I told him 10K lol

  391. SugaCaneBby says:

    Got my book! Woo hoo!

  392. NJLady says:

    I know it’s late Sugar’s, just wanted to say a big Thank You to everyone for your suggetions…tomorrow it’s only drinks…..next week we are having dinner, so maybe then I’ll get a manicure…..keep it simple, yet a little sexy, not to much, can’t go wrong with a black dress, and I’ll walk in there with confidence! As for the one who said..”if it doesn’t work I’ll call you”…..he had a good thing and let it go…someone better, (hopefully) came along…..Thanks again Sugar’s you guy’s are great!

  393. SugaCaneBby says:

    Hey Sweety SB! Top of the evening to ya’!

    ginaZ, I get what you’re saying. On one hand, I don’t want to subtly advertise sex because that’s not what I’m about at all (and I can honestly say, to date, every man that has ever been honest to God into me and not just looking to hit’n’quit was into me because of my personality) but I know that a shot showing some skin will get views. Men are visual creatures. I grew up as “one of the boys” so I kinda see what they do as well and I don’t blame them.

    Just from general networking sites, I have a pic of me wearing black framed glasses and sporting red lipstick…people seem to like that one because of the naughty secretary implications. That’s what I was going for though so mission accomplished, lol. 😉

  394. ginaZ says:

    Evening Sweetie 😉

  395. ginaZ says:

    Suga maybe contact the gentlemen anyway? The one who lives in the area you used to live. One never knows!

  396. ginaZ says:

    Hey Suga 😉 The upgrade isn’t as steep for the ladies, but I totally understand where your coming from, making sure the profile and photos are tip top. It does seem, the profile pic is the most important part. Why? because before the pot SD’s read your wonderful profile, they see the image. That and a great headline!

    I also hate to admit that yes, the one pic that has made my in box full at times is my smiling buxom shot, I tried a more demure one but it didn’t work as well. But I think that it could be different for someone else. Ones age, location can be appealing. What photos have worked for the SB’s?

    Another tip is I’d been on the site HoN and I did go with the “hot” pictures to help narrow the field a bit.

  397. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Evening sugars!

  398. SugaCaneBby says:

    ginaZ: I’m going to upgrade, but only once I’m sure my profile is in tip-top shape…and when I have 60 bucks to spare.

    Browsing the area around my former locale and came across the profile of an intriguing gentleman who I believe would be a great match…if I hadn’t moved away a year ago. Darn.

    Building my favorites, waiting on props for my shoot to ship (and my book! I should check the mail in a bit) and then I’m getting into this seriously. Still kinda of feeling this all out.

  399. ginaZ says:

    TLG! Nighty night.

    OCSB coming soon to your neck of the woods girl.

    Am I all alone? Hmmm…curious how many of the SB’s are orange members? I was once, I may try yet again.

  400. ginaZ says:

    Oh my! NYCSB there’s quite a nice…well did someone say 6 pack;) He’s in NYC, on the front, one of those featured. Anyway I thought of you 😉

  401. yep I am going tobed too bye all!

  402. Lisa Marie says:

    ha ha. have fun there.
    Well I guess I am off of here for the night. talk to you later!

  403. The Lone Gunman says:

    Well, I’m off to bed.

    See all of you sometime Saturday–tomorrow is a Sugar day for me.


  404. still here I am watching hsn. I dont know WHY I really lovethere handbags!

  405. Lisa Marie says:

    it seems to have died down in here

  406. The Lone Gunman says:

    I’m lurking.

    Killing time waiting for a call.


  407. Lisa Marie says:

    where is everyone on here?

  408. Lisa Marie says:

    check your email kat

  409. ok well HE puts on a Wig and his personality Goes from Meek and Shy to Fierce!! ok….. for you I suggest some really Sexy shoes!!
    OK if that dont work Borrow somebodeys Attuide.

    for me When I get my hair done, my attitude changes if its long and flowing I am a little bit more bashful!
    if I got my hair in a Edgy*mohawk* type of du I have a matter of fact attitude!
    if I got on my natrul hair I am kinda just Caffinated!! like normal!!

  410. Lisa Marie says:

    Hey Katrina I got an email today! RIght before I got off earlier

  411. Gemini29 says:


  412. Gemi you ever seen boston legal? seen the charcter Clarance/clarise/clevon?

  413. NYC With all due Respect the way you carry yourself that joker wouldnt even get into your mailbox! I cant see anybody coming at you like that!

  414. Lisa Marie says:

    Hey sugars….how is everyone this evening?

  415. Gemini29 says:

    Whats that? You’ll call for me? lololololol

    In person – Totally my element. Love it, I’m great, confidant, fabulous.
    Email/blogging – really my element. I love writing, soo…
    Phone- NOT. MY. ELEMENT. (haaaaaaaaaaaaaaate)

  416. Gemi I got the PERFECT SOLUTION for real, I can help!!

  417. SugaCaneBby says:

    Gemi – It was just a playful lil’ jab. :) I’m super sarcastic so most of what I say, if it’s preceeded or concluded with a lol or a smiley, I’m usually just ribbing.

    And yeah, those anxiety attacks are killer.

    I agree with NEOhio. Don’t really know Kaali from a can of paint, but if she’s anything like me, she’ll be so eager to please, she’ll get guilted into doing something she doesn’t want. *shrug* It’s a good idea to just nix men like that to begin with. No second chances. He should’ve known better.

  418. Rica says:

    Yeah because we dont want any rape or any crazy safety issues.

  419. Kali that is what we are here for support. and a top that list we do not want anyone to go in to anything unsafe ! believe me if its got a red flag Somebody will call it on the carpet!

    Hey I got an(2nd) e-mail *yippee* a smarty guy a debater man I love a dude who can Argue …*debate* his point of view!! just love to pick someones brain!

  420. NeOhio SB says:

    NYSB- I respect your words, but i disagree. He has already told her his preconceived idea of what his intentions are. IF she feels uncomfortable with that initially, why even put herself in the predicament. I wouldn’t even go there. Plenty of other SDs who have alot more class and respect for a woman!!!

  421. Gemini29 says:

    lol no he’s not a jerk, he’s offering help actually. I’m just sitting here frozen though….absolute anxiety attack. crap!

  422. SugaCaneBby says:

    Gemi – I knoooooow! Nerve wracking, isn’t it? But HE wants you to call so let him take the lead since he’s the one who wants to talk…even though he should call you. Jerk, lol.

  423. Kaalii says:

    thts true gemini, and to think that i was gonna wear my flirty dress- in my head- its la creme de la creme of dresses haha..
    and thts funny–hes officially out of the running, blocked!
    But thankss sooo much for the advice guys- ur the bestt!! I was gonna go crazy if i didnt get another perspective outside myself…

  424. lol Neohio too funny! I was thinking like he must think Iam pressed for his attention baby I dropped him an E-mail saying since you didnt met my informational Req’s I wish you luck on your Search!

  425. NYC SB says:

    Kali – actually a lot of SDs do not reveal their full name before meeting… I mean if a guy is legit he wouldn’t want to reveal all that personal info to a stranger…

    while his comment was somewhat crude… meet him… you do not owe him anything… if you hit it off and you feel comfortable then accept the allowance… if you do not like him tell him “thanks but no thanks”

    one thing though: he offered to fly in to meet you… you didnt force him… emphasize that nothing will happen unless there is chemistry and see what he does

  426. SugaCaneBby says:

    There are a lot of guys who say they won’t pay for sex, but expect intimancy on here…contradiction much?

    Bleh, this lifestyle is reaaaaaallly sticky with what some believe to be “required” in the “terms”, but I guess ground rule number one is ALWAYS trust your instincts. If you’re not comfortable, don’t go for it. Kaali, I’d tell him thank you for your time, but I don’t believe we’re seeing eye to eye on how the initial stages of this arrangement should go. Good luck.

  427. Gemini29 says:

    Ok…I guess my phone phobia is rearing its ugly little head again. I can dial the numbers and not freak out, I can dial the numbers and not freak out. Breathe, Gemi, breathe! :( :( :( :(

  428. NeOhio SB says:

    Kat- HA. Just came across one of those clones myself.

  429. rica no not my kingpin he never gave me his photo or his name, like imma just go meet you in the Dark, Not me brotha! no name no-game!! no info no-go-go!!

  430. Note to self *fling a drink* lol I thought that was only on the Soaps!!
    and buy Long gloves for Sifting! hints from Gemi!!
    Kali give him the 3 finger salute WHATEVER!!!! and block!!

  431. Gemini29 says:

    Oh hon, get his full name before you meet ANYONE. Most pot SDs will willingly give it to you without asking, beware the ones who refuse.

    At the very least he showed his true colors and saved you some time getting ready, going, and wanting to fling your drink at him.

    I treat this initial process the way I would any other dating situation… if a guy gets fresh or lowballs me or says stuff that turns me off….I ditch him. I’m very very picky and I stand my ground, I feel that by respecting myself I will eventually find a SD who also respects me :) There is one out there for every girl, we just have to sift through the crap to find them! :)

  432. Kaalii says:

    if i sent you the initial email he sent, u wouldnt even believe the same person made that comment..
    oh sorry i forgot to respond im in ont.canada..

  433. Rica says:

    Yes ma’am Katrina I do also agree…unless you are kosher with it and get the first half deposited into your account there is no guarantee that it ever will. Me, I am always weary about the high allowances. Hey Kat did you go on that date you posted about wanting to knock out?

  434. Kaalii says:

    yes, thats a direct quote from his last text message– i couldnt even reply because my mouth was too open.. and im guessing my fingers are in shock..thanks so much for the advice guys kat/neohio/gemini
    im trying to check how legit he is but dont have much to go on.. other then hes location/profession/ pictures/a first name and # basically 35hrs of talking on the phn and i guess i dont know much about him]… and yes hes from the site-
    in real life i would definetly slap the guy across the face-was alittle more hesitant in this situation. I definetly have to be cautious. 1 down- others to go..

  435. we on point tonight ladies!! Kali the I wont be leaving Work for 2 days for nothing SAYS yes he is expecting to meet you and yes he is expecting som action, he probabaly will pull this test drive business/tell you he dosnt have it after !
    I just dont like that Kali and honey Whatever you do I support you but be careful!

  436. Rica says:

    I totally agree! If he is a gentleman he would not approach you like that. Were any of your emails geared towards sex? How did he email you when you first started speaking?

  437. NeOhio SB says:

    Good evening Gemini: Think we are all on the same page about that SD. Id be outta there before it even happened.

  438. Gemini29 says:

    Hi NeOhio SB! Hey Katrina!

  439. Gemini29 says:

    And I third the girls above….always always check out the guy on google and stuff.

    I would be concerned about the money amount too. He might be luring you in with the $$ amount hoping that you won’t think twice. I would be verrrryyy cautious about this…heck after that comment of his I would be canceling the date…

  440. NeOhio SB says:

    Katrina- Very well said. Completely agree with you and your advice to her. For any of the newbies, don’t ever let the allowance or $$$ push you to something that you ever would feel uncomfortable in. Never ever ever.
    And yes Kat. Im in Ohio….do you have some bad apple Sd news lurking around here. Ive sorted out the locals already, moving on.

  441. Kali I am disgusted and I dont even know you! I dont like that comment about Shaking hands at ALLLLLL!!! who is he thinking hes talking to,

  442. kali
    I cannot believe he said that to you, OMG what a mess, hes from this site? I am floored I didnt think guys over here were like that.
    ok I am just too thru with that,
    My Question to you is, Would you put up with a man talking to you like that in a conventional relationship?
    you will get a lot of options on how to handle it but mine Seems to be the most out there! ok What I would say to him is I dont think I like arrogance and maybe I am not the Right Sb for you!
    or tell him you are having an allerergic reaction to his Bs, who does he think hes talking to.
    or just Block his blockhead! he might one of those ones who bait you with a high allowance and then putyou in some situation because your a newSb he maybe flat out lying!
    are you in ohio by chance?

  443. Gemini29 says:

    Kaali – Yes, the first meeting should just be a hi, talk, shake hands, leave. But with that said, most pot SDs do not give any allowance for a first meeting.

    But the allowance thing is the least of it. His comment says it all….extremely bluntly too, IMO. He is frankly implying that he will want to sleep with you, and that he expects to sleep with you when he comes up. He’s moving VERY quickly IMO. And the way he phrased that? Ugh.

    I would clarify what you expect on the first meeting and see what he says (ha!) Because from where I stand, you are expecting a normal first meet “hello, how are you? lets have coffee/dinner” and he’s expecting “Hi, ok lets go to my hotel room”

  444. NeOhio SB says:

    Kaali- OMG. Absolutely check him out through google, etc, if you haven’t already. Don’t let the $$$ get in your way of your own safety and security……..ever.

  445. KALI whats his Rush? what kinda SD rushes a SB? and yes youd better Check him out on google linkedin and spoke I think it was do a property search too just to verify his asset and that he has a house!

  446. he said that verbatim??? what

  447. Kaalii says:

    ive also heard about the freezing,actually, i got to see it first hand. came home one day to a freezer full of my mothers shoe,.pleasant ..hehe

    Im new to the sugar world,.and in need of some sweet advice..
    Its my second week, and i have a pot SD who ive spoken to for apx 6days..hes wants to meet this weekend, which is great-so hes coming to my town to see me-is willing to pay 2x my budget (10k), first half upon meeting and seems legit (is there a way to do a background check? hmm)only thing is he mentioned that he ‘wouldnt be coming all the way here and taking 2days from work to simply shake hands’. Isnt that moving to quick? upon the first meeting shouldnt it just be a “Hi-bye” situtation? the anticipation is making me nervous, any advice?

  448. DesertBunny says:

    Oh yes! Her stuff is lovely!

  449. oh DBunny them hats are EXACTLY what I wanted! I gotta go on e-bay them hats are Expensive I dont know where even to store such a item like that!

  450. oh she has handbags too!! ooooohweee

  451. no I just pulled out the website to look at! Ill tell you in a sec if thats the Sweet spot!

  452. DesertBunny says:

    Nice, Katrina! I will have to check out Koali glasses. The name sounds cool. Did you find your floppy hat?

  453. DesertBunny says:

    I also LOVE the brand FRESH for fragrance. And they have the best non-sticky lip glosses too!

  454. DesertBunny says:

    Ahhh… yes! The fancy containers. CREED is the brand 😉

  455. Ill have to check that out being as I spend all my disposable money on Glasses, I love my eyeglasses I got all kinds I got these koali glasses oh theses are art!

  456. who is it made by? I like chanel and umm Estee and a few others but Those I like for content. the otheres I like the fancy continers

  457. DesertBunny says:

    Yep! You should check it out… the scents are heavenly!

  458. Creed ahh I assume not the band, what is that a fragrance?

  459. dog! I sent it Que! man… I even looked it up and it did not come up in the dictonary, man!! Btw I try to be super offical when Iam in e-mail to pots they catch my Phunny later!

  460. DesertBunny says:

    Hello everyone! OC!!!

    I’m a happy SB today! I just received a package! CREED- LOVE in WHITE (slightly different vibe than the last package I received..wouldn’t you say, OC?!)! One of my favorites and I was running low!

    Sending warm sugar thoughts to you all :)

  461. Gemini29 says:

    Katrina – Its Queue :)

  462. ok OC you gina Vixen and Gemi yall need to pin down WHAT kracks yall up about my post??
    I warned people I am part Wanda Sykes and part Whoopi goldberg! my scarsacm is that of jimmie Kimmel! and I handle my money like fort knox!! hehe

  463. Miz_Red says:

    *Kat*- 2 things that past SD’s LOVED about me…..1: when a man makes me happy or feel good or smile etc….I tend to touch their arm, ill give a little squeeze to their upper arm or shoulder, or just a light touch on their forearm. I never knew it was a big deal until I realised they REALLY liked it. They take it as a thank u, or a sign of affection. & 2: I giggle a LOT when im happy or I feel good…& clearly along with a giggle is a smile. =) & in my experience, men love it!

  464. Miz_Red says:

    Hey Ladies & Gents….

    …would u all be as sweet as sugar & view my profile/pics and give me ur honest opinions?

    When I made my profile…I honestly gave it very little thought, I kind of just started clicking away. Now that I’ve thought about it…I’ve come up w’ a lot of things I’d like to change/add.

    Thank u all in advance!

    xoxo -Red
    Profile#: 367023

  465. and hey OC you musta been lurking , glad to see you back!
    ok I wanna get us fired up in here!

    What did you do For a sugar daddy that Knocked his socks off?
    not talking sexually, but What really Endeared your SD to you?

  466. hey OC you in Sandiego? there Was something on the First page about wanting San Diego Sb… I thought about you!!

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      Nope Kat, I am not in San Diego. Further North up the beach. Newport area. I didn’t read the one about San Diego SB’s wanted. I have not been on line in a few days. Busy with work and painting at night!

      • OCSugarbaby says:

        Kat you crack me up. Not lurking, just log’d in to check my emails. I am still at work and heading to a meeting so. I will have to play later. Great questions!

  467. Miz_Red says:

    I wish I didn’t find the need to mention it at all, bc im very protective of them. Though, my children are both very young, and im COMPLETELY alone in raising them. Which sets me back from doing a lot bc I don’t have good resources for child care. So sometimes, it comes up in my planning to meeting or talking with a SD or a pot. SD.

  468. bye L’ see you tomorrow!

  469. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    I think to acknowledge this and on what level you do that on (parenting) is up to you and your comfort level. I don’t know what else to say on the topic as I’m not one so take it away girls and I’m signing off for the evening…………….


  470. Miz_Red says:

    I mention that im a mother bc its a major aspect of my life…esp when it comes to be needing to go out, etc, with a pot. SD. I just make sure its none that I am a single mother for a reason. I LOVE IT!

  471. Lisa Marie says:

    ok sugars..heading home now…..be online later tonight probably

  472. Lisa Marie says:

    And Katrina, I think its Que

  473. Lisa Marie says:

    Katrina you have mail :)

  474. Miz_Red says:


    AND Im on my way to being a Cosmotologist and Barber!

  475. keya703 at the yahhh you feel free to drop me a line!

  476. to wait in line is it Que or Cue? trying to let a pot know his time is short!

  477. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Lisa Marie, mailed you back.
    And anyone else that wants to write me (even if it is to say hi)
    email address is up. Hopefully I’ll get a good endorsement from the
    ones who already have!!!
    voulevous91 at mail that’s hot


  478. Miz_Red says:

    Hey Ladies & Gents….

    …would u all be as sweet as sugar & view my profile/pics and give me ur honest opinions?

    When I made my profile…I honestly gave it very little thought, I kind of just started clicking away. Now that I’ve thought about it…I’ve come up w’ a lot of things I’d like to change/add.

    Thank u all in advance!

    xoxo -Red
    Profile#: 367023

  479. my point is a Pedicure cant really go wrong unless they are Cutting Cuticle*which is a no-no* and same thing with a basic manicure. shouldnt run more that 30$

  480. Lisa Marie says:

    Katrina….well right now…I have nails on…thats one expense I do save for to make my hands pretty….I do my own feet. but I of course LOVE to have them done for me. Love the French Manicure look on them better.

  481. Lisa marie IF you are going to do Basic type stuff ped mani wash/set go to a beauty school!

  482. Lisa Marie says:

    Ok I have a few mins befoer I have to go….
    Need input….
    What are your thoughts on the Married SDs?

  483. yeah suga I seen that on a show about the freezing

  484. Lisa Marie says:

    ok sugars…its died down a lot in here…..So I am going to get off and maybe be back on later tonight.

    L’amant Imaginaire if you see this…I emailed you back.

  485. Gemini29 says:

    Good luck NJLady!

  486. SugaCaneBby says:

    Yay NJLady! Glad we could help!

    Now if only I could get some of that success for myself, LOL.

    NYC, there’s this tutorial on the net about stretching leather shoes using ziplock backs and ice.

  487. Rica says:

    good luck to you NJLady!!!!!

  488. Lisa Marie says:

    good tips NYC thank you

  489. NYC SB says:

    wear something you feel comfortable in… something that makes you feel sexy without being overexposed… also as a note do not spend money on clothes and manicure pedicure unless you can afford it :)

  490. Lisa Marie says:

    What kind of place are you meeting?

  491. NJLady says:

    He wants to meet for drinks tomorrow night and dinner next week!!!!!

    I am happy…..finally! What should I wear? Calls for a trip to the mall, and a manicure….Thanks Sugar’s

  492. NYC SB says:

    yes my size varies from shoe to shoe… most their shoes are in patent leather which doesn’t stretch as much… however they can have them sent out to their factories to get them professionally stretched out…. one of the perks for 1k shoes…

    Congrats NJLady :)

    Thank you all for the well wishes

  493. Lisa Marie says:

    Sooo happy for you NJLady! Have fun!

  494. NJLady says:

    IT WORKED !!!!! SugaCaneBby and SF SD…..It worked!! Not with the one I told you about with someone else….He wrote back, thought I was terrific, like my profile and……HE WANTS TO MEET…..got to go….Thanks again Sugar’s

  495. Gemini29 says:

    Yeah and Louboutin sizing is whack! (sorry but it is) Don’t buy until you try them on and see what size fits you best…some styles fit differently!!

  496. AWHHHH knife in my heart!! my feet are not nawwor. I dont have anything that fits that title hehehe!!
    NYC if they are Leather shoes woulndnt they Strech!!

  497. Lisa Marie says:

    NYC SB –
    First….Hello How are you?
    and…I don’t have narrow feet. But I couldnt afford Louboutin’s anyways. Ha Ha

  498. NYC SB says:

    Word to all… unless you have narrow feet prepare to have trouble finding a Louboutin that fits right… they are gorgeous and very narrow

  499. NYC SB says:

    Hi Sugar fam… did someone say Louboutins 😀

    still home nursing this cold … it will be gone by tomorrow i hope… i have shopping to do this weekend

  500. Lisa Marie says:

    NJLady…. I agree with Katrina….he sounds flaky. Like using you as a backup plan. Which is up to you if your ok with that. If you connect well then you wouldnt be a backup plan…you may want to find something that doesnt seem so flaky and unsure.

  501. Lisa Marie says:

    L’amant Imaginaire hey you have mail :)

    Whats everyone up to this afternoon? Or where every you are depending on what time it is.

  502. Lisa Marie says:

    Hey Sugars, I am back!

  503. Njlady hesounds kinda flaky sounds like he is a lazy SD in to convience if choice A dont work Ill settle with you?
    Whats his problem!

  504. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    NJ Lady writes: “would it be alright to write to him or leave it alone, maybe he’ll see my profile.”

    I think and I’m no expert here, but based on the ratio of SB’s to SD’s if you leave it alone, sure he MIGHT see it, but if you send him a message he WILL see it for sure.

    Just keep it casual. Make a joke about it……… “Fancy seeing you again, do you come to this site often?” A bit cheesy but sometimes it’s good to lighten the mood. You can follow this up with “I saw your profile thought you we had some great dialogue and would like to at least have a chat with you to see if maybe we can give this a second shot perhaps? meet for a coffee if the conversation goes well?” Provided he lives close enough to you.

    I’m going to put a disclosure and say I’m just trying to help and state my opinion, which can be worth a lot or can be disregarded to anyone who takes or wants my advice. That’s what this blog is for and I’m just here to help and to get help as I’m not perfect at this either.


  505. NJ yeah Do what the others say, Suggest you go catch an Early film together! you will do fine

  506. NJLady says:

    Thank you SugaCaneBby and SF SD, for the advice….One other thing…I just saw a SD that I was interested a while back then went with someone else…he said if it didn’t work out he would contact me….would it be alright to write to him or leave it alone, maybe he’ll see my profile.

  507. SF SD says:

    > Suga – “NJLady – I would just tell him that I’ve read his profile and noticed we has common interest such as…”

    Good advice. The main thing about writing is getting an answer back. If you’ve taken the time to read what he’s written, understand what he’s looking for, that makes your mail stand out from the canned messages. If it turns out that you have a common interest, that can be a good conversation starter, too. Tnere’s no magic to it — you can’t predict what someone else is going to respond to. But showing interest and being yourself are usually pretty good moves. Good luck!

  508. SugaCaneBby says:

    Lol, I’m not even into Oprah like that but she always looks sharp on her shows.

    NJLady – I would just tell him that I’ve read his profile and noticed we has common interest such as (insert what you also like here). I’d really like to get to know more about you and see if we click.

    …and that all I have. The initial message is always the tough one for some reason,

  509. well last season She touted them Very highly,!!! you Know us sistas gotta do What O do I just gotta Save save save!!!

  510. NJLady says:

    Sugar’s…quick I need some help….I want to write to this guy…in lives close to to me….likes movies, travel, resturants, boating and swimming….wants a passionate women for occasional meetings or long term….any suggestions on what I should write….Thanks

  511. SugaCaneBby says:

    I love what a corset does for the female form. I’m a slight person and in normal street clothes, I’m pretty straight up and down but get me some nice fitted jeans, wedges, and a corset and it’s va va VOOM.

    So Oprah only wears Louboutons, eh? I see… *takes notes*

  512. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Hey Katrina, you have mail xx

  513. hey Suga I like that stuff too I love me some tight Jeans and some plats I cant bend over to get them on!! I gotta try a corset see what that do!
    I seen a pencil skirt that had a Zipper that ran say over the Knee &curved up to the hip area It was right on!

  514. Gemini29 says:

    OC – I like my nickname here! Thanks! :)

  515. those shoes are Christan Loubatons!! I know I killed the Spelling you get th point!! most of the ones I have seen are!

    ok danngit Nyc hope you feel Better love,
    anybody know of a nice Shoe brand that makes Wide widths?
    stipulation is: I dont want anything that looks like aunt Gladys cousin mabel or Miss Ruthie wears to Sunday Service.
    Nice shoes!! platforms, wedges, booties , peeptoes gladiators
    Anybody know??
    heres my E-mail Keya703 at the yahh!

  516. well I guess Iam gonn run with the rest of the flock, gots to do laundry!!
    Suga I hope you feel better Imma Send you an E-mail in a sec!

    oh Dani I notice alot of things and I have already sent e-mails to those I havent seen recently, I tend to think you guys are my friends and I like to keep my friends!!

  517. SugaCaneBby says:

    Katrina- Yesh. Oprah wears some shoes that are pure fiyah. Once again, would have the first clue about who designed them, I just know that I couldn’t afford them. 😉

  518. SugaCaneBby says:

    I’ve wanted a pair of black and red stilletos foreverrrrrrrrr. So hawt.

    I have a very strange style. Kinda dark, kinda artsy. I like pencil skirts, corsets, fishnets, tight jeans, lace-up boots, tribal jewelry. Lol, that sounds bad, but I clean up quite nice. :)

    I’m just saying I would hope whatever SD I find doesn’t think I’ll fall all over myself for some Manolo or Dior…because I’ll be like, “Oh, these are cute!” and then…lol, I don’t know.

  519. I mean Footwear on the Oprah comment I made!

  520. Lisa Marie says:

    I am off to run some errands right now Sugars…I will be back later

  521. Lisa Marie says:

    oooo i like the thought of the black and red stilletos…sexy! i have a pair of red ones and a pair of black ones….not mixed……but those sound hot!

  522. Suga anything that Oprah wear is Rite on, I wonder do they make Wide with’s

  523. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Oh Gina Z, I’m nothing of the sort, don’t make me blush……….

    I’m just another anonymous person with alot of anecdotes, no more no less.

  524. SugaCaneBby says:


    And these black stilletos with the red soles I just came across are sexy. :3

  525. hey gina YO!! lol see ya later lady!

  526. SugaCaneBby says:

    Hey sugars! The advil I took isn’t working so I’m trying to grin and bear through some lovely pain right now! Munching on carrot sticks and watching my cat play with this squeaky mouse toy I bought him yesterday. Trying to be sweet on him because he has his surgery tomorrow.

    I just realized that a question from the last blog about what would set me apart from other SB is that I’m not crazy about name brands? Not saying you’re bad if you do, but I’m of the school of thought where if I want something, I want it, doesn’t matter what Italian slapped their name on it, lol. Don’t get me wrong, very into fashion, but more into the styling aspect of it (clothing combinations) than anything else.

    Going to have to check out this Christian Loubitin (if I spelled that right) person. Been hearing a lot about him.

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      SugaCaneBby: I am a BIG fan of “find your own style”, it fits the sugar life as well. Don’t try to emulate someone’s exact sugar style. It just does not work. Fine tune your own and when something doesn’t work… Back up, regroup, and try a different approach. Being a Sugar Baby is NOT a cookie cutter style.
      I think standing out in a crowd of Sugar Baby’s is refreshing and eye catching. Confidence, class and a positive attitude does not have a designer label.

  527. Lisa Marie says:

    Katrina. Ahh I understand Yeah I could use some help…but I am not into someone trying to run things for me. I am taking care of myself. help is appreciated kinda thing.

    L’amant Imaginaire you have mail!!

  528. ginaZ says:

    Well just popped in again…(Yo!)

    Mornin’ OC!

    L’amant Imaginaire you are an enchantress 😉

    Now I’m off. A bit of a drive to my University for an emergency loan. Ah…the perils of a student sans SD.

    sigh ,

  529. OFFEND ME??? hahahah Thats funny I mis half the Offensive stuff because of my Sarcasam !
    and the other half I miss because I have my Exzuberance forcefield on high!! hheehehe otherwise known as Caffinee
    OC short of talking about Politics and money nothing Offends me! unless your gonna send me a photo of your male parts That offends me!!

  530. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    p.s. OCSugarbaby: email me at my address, I have a question for you.

  531. Dani says:

    Hey Everyone!

    Olivia- Congrats on your men raining from the sky lol!!

    Ginaz- I love the fantasy! Maybe SDs should remember that for xmas time.

    Katrina- Just wanted to let you know that I’ll be out of town for a few days! I think it’s great that you noticed my absense (i’m sending sugar vibes your way). Good luck on Friday!!

  532. I dont have any Idea who HE is looking for but maybe one who is desperste for a light bill payment,
    no-brother not me! my bills are all handled!! thankyou!!

  533. Aggressive same way in Real life, IF a man start talking about how he Goona lay pipe, how hes gonna Sweep me off my feet he gonna come Run things, I am just rather hesitant!
    this particular man Says he has a Settlement coming up and I said ok fine!
    but his money is not my money, it has no bearing and Why would you even tell anybody your personal finance!
    then just because I kinda felt he was Snow Blowing I just kept talking about money, and he says well I gusee for a nice broad that Can cook and keep her mouth Shut to me is worth 3k, now can I come see you on Fri!

    Thats aggressive!!

  534. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    OCSugarbaby: Hollywood Glam room!! That deserves an Ooh la la.
    My flat looks very plain at the moment as I just finished going through my 70s americana phrase (brady bunch wallpaper and all that) my dorm room mate at university was american and she was into vintage 70s stuff and got me into it as well, but I’m going back to a more modern vibe myself.

  535. Lisa Marie says:

    Kat explain the aggressive please (new to this)

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      My BAD! Katrina I am sorry if my calling you Kat offends you. I have a horrible habit of giving nicknames. I do like the Kat one (purrs like a Kat but roars when she needs to) 😉
      I did the same thing to Gemini (sorry)

  536. heck no i get the ones who scare me off by being to aggressive!!

  537. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Lisa Marie: you have mail :)

  538. Lisa Marie says:

    ahhhh, see the New York kinda Mafia accent kinda scares me a bit. Ha Ha

  539. Lisa Marie says:

    oooo yes, Aussie is most definately sexy!

  540. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    OC Sugar Baby: Haha, no I am French, but I have british spellings, as it’s how I was taught english during school………. I don’t recall saying I was British, and if I did sincere apologies for writing the wrong thing, sometimes get to typing a bit late and race changes LOL

    (better than a sex change so there you have it.)

    And ladies, as a European, trust me, it’s great for about a month then you get used to it fairly quickly. I find an American accent a bit strange, especially that Long Island New York one.

  541. what about an aussie accent??

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      Hi Kat and LisaMarie. Today is a great day! I thought I would pop in before lunch and see how the sugar is pouring. lol
      Aussie Accent? Hmmm that would do as well.

      I have however struggled with painting my bedroom for the past several days. Let’s just say that I have found speckles of “wisteria” on me and my dog! I will never make a living as a professional painter. But after two attempts with a color choice, it looks like a Hollywood Glam warm and sexy room! Just waiting for the new furniture I ordered and it will be complete.

      Any new dates Kat?

  542. Lisa Marie says:

    OCSugarbaby….hello, first of all.
    AND, I have to agree on the british accent on a man. most, not all….accents are sexy on me. Love French and British. Hmmmmm. Oh the things I dream of with men like that….oops.

  543. hey OC how are you today?

  544. Lisa Marie says:


  545. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    cool well it’s voulevous91 at mail that is hot

    send me a message doll, and we can go from there!!!!!!

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      Happy Sugar-rific day to everyone! Wow, far too many post to read. Just going to start at the top and skim. lol

      L’amant Imaginaire: I thought you said you were from England and Brittish! I can sense a great deal of a Brittish-ism’s in your posts. They are cheeky! I have a good friend I work with from London and she has said many of the same phrases. I love a brittish accent on a man!

  546. Lisa Marie says:

    I would love an email address to ask more questions over time.
    Maybe get your input on things.

  547. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    SF SD: Haha, my good sir you must find a girl to practise your technique with then 😉

    LIsa Marie: I am in an arrangement. I already am out of university and debt free, and I am in the art industry; I met my SD after about 1 month or so of being on here (the current one). Our arrangement started off like a normal date to be honest, we met up, we had drinks, we had dinner, I made him laugh, he kissed me good night and we parted. Then the next night (as he was in town on business) we decided we had ample amount of chemistry to take it to the next level (might want to put that imagination to use during this part of the story) and he gives me nice cute gifts and assists me with a monthly allowance. I really fancy him and he does me, but we are both aware of the fact that we could never be in a real relationship, so we relish the time we do have together and enjoy our fauxmance and that’s that. It’s a really apple pie arrangement, I wish I had more to say about it, but we are both simple easy going people, well he is at least, I’m the worst kind of girl and I’ll quote Billy Crystal from When Harry Met Sally:

    You’re the worst kind; you’re high maintenance but you think you’re low maintenance.

    (Of course being French Truffaut would beg to differ…..)

    Hope that helps if you need the specifics just ask me or I can offer you an email address to reach me at for a more one on one conversation.

  548. Lisa Marie says:

    Hey here is a question. I am new to this….can you guys tell me about your experiances?? Ok…not so much a question in general…but a question all the same.
    You ladies (or gentleman) all young and no plain back grounds? No kids and such?? Students? Working?

  549. Lisa Marie says:

    hmmmmmm pure imagination…sounds good. I’m in!

  550. SF SD says:

    > I’amant – “SF SD: Come to France then and try to take off some of the couture dresses we wear……… takes me long enough to get IN one let alone get it off.”

    Hmmm. Yes, I could see that couture would require graduate-level study, and perhaps a steady hand when the cost of one’s ensemble is equivalent to, say, the Gross Domestic Product of Liechtenstein.

    Being the possessor of a Y-chromosome, I can readily appreciate situations when one might wish for a pair of drawstring yoga pants.

  551. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Come with me and you’ll be in a world of pure imagination…………… xx

  552. Lisa Marie says:

    L’amant Imaginaire yes, it is a good ice breaker. Everyone is so curious about it.

    Yes, and where are we with out imagination? extremely bored. I prefer imagination.

  553. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Katrina- Merci dahling! I’m here all night, just tip me at the end of the show!!

    Lisa Marie- well, it’s a good ice breaker though. You’ll always have a great topic to start off a conversation.

    (Yo) Gina Z: Imagination is very important…….. fantasy is such an ephemeral word anyways. Front row seat excepted. And maybe afterwards, if you’re not seeing anyone….. LOL I won’t finish that sentence. kiss kiss dahling

  554. Lisa Marie says:

    Yo GinaZ ! :)

  555. ginaZ says:

    L’amant Imaginaire one front row seat plus guest reserved my dear.

    Einstein did say that Imagination is more important than knowledge so fantasy is alive and well. My dreams have never ceased, nor will they! L’amant Imaginaire I so like the way you think 😉

    I do like the catchphrase, pretty snazzy I’d say.

  556. Lisa Marie says:

    L’amant Imaginaire…yeah I get that all the time. No relation or anything…not name after in any way. but I do like the name either way.

    Gina Z….Oh yes heres to hopin’. Would love to be swept off my feet. As close as I can get to my dreams is in my dreams at the moment. ha

  557. L’amant you are too funny! I love European folks very Frank!

  558. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Yo Gina Z (it’s going to catch on around here trust me): Well, just save me a front seat at your fashion line’s debut!!!!! And you are correct madame, fantasies do come true, that’s not just a line used in perfume commercials or ads for disneyworld.

  559. L.I
    oh I see I guess I will have to go Track down what you are talking about!

  560. ginaZ says:

    L’amant Imaginaire so funny “Yo GinaZ” is a bit Jenny from the blok a.k.a JLo;)

    I have been called funky white girl a few times in my life…so it works!

    My entrepreneurial side does have a fashion line in the works, accessories and T-Shirts. So… one never knows!

    Lisa Marie…fantasies do come true, and a girl can dream. So here’s wishin, hopin’ :)

  561. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Katrina- no, no Katrina and the Waves silly girl, not KC and the Sunshine Band.
    Haven’t you heard the song Walking On Sunshine. I’m only 22 here, so I know if I’ve heard it, most of you have. And I’m not really couture, a bit smug perhaps, but I’m french, we’re supposed to be……

    As long as those shoes (Lady Gaga) weren’t covered in blood as that’s all I remember from the awards show (or what I saw on you tube.) Really? that was the best she could do to be shocking? Cover herself in fake blood? Animal excrement would have been more engrossing for me in my opinion. I’m just saying…… save the fake blood stunts for the annual rocky horror shows.

    Lisa Marie: I know I don’t even have to mention who I think of when I see your name, but “thank you, thank you very much.” LOL

  562. Lisa Marie says:

    Katrina….Wow. 1K? Would just love to see what those look like.
    Lady Gaga, she is definately and intresting one. The music awards outfit was ….well I was speechless.

  563. Lisa Marie says:

    L’amant Imaginaire
    Ha Ha I wanna go to France to just try on the dresses you guys have! So amazing. But hey….the more to take orr the more the fun in its own way….makes the “want” even stronger. Can’t be to easy….make it fun!

  564. I loved the Sunshine gang! well youll be happy to know that every time I see your post I think of couture people ! I cant Quote on Who Exactly but I get a Really stylish gal w/ shopping bags image, Even though You and I cant Wear eactothers clothes we might be on the same page with shoes
    I seen some shoes for a 1k yesterday I cant even tell you What they were but they kinda looked lady GAGA’s outfit on the music awards show
    maybe something Pink would Wear!

  565. Lisa Marie says:

    hmmm Gina Z….
    I like your fantasy….sounds good.
    Hmmm to make my own fantasy like that.

  566. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    SF SD: Come to France then and try to take off some of the couture dresses we wear……… takes me long enough to get IN one let alone get it off. My boyfriends in the past always ask me when I’ll stop loving fashion and opt for proper trousers and simple shirts as my style can get complicated when attempting to remove the clothing I wear.

    Katrina: Everytime I see a post you’ve put up, I’m Walking on Sunshine by Katrina and the Waves pops into my head. I love the scene in High Fidelity when Jack Black dances to it as the “Monday Song” perhaps a good pick up line when meeting an SD 😉

    Yo Gina Z!!!! (sounds like a fashion brand) but I think everytime i say hi to you that’s your catchphrase….. it’s cool though I like it.

  567. ginaZ says:

    No worries SFSD 😉

    And yes the removal of bras and straps can be fun for the girl as well. Of course this depend upon whom is doing the removal of undergarments.


    … my special SD wherever you might be (Oh where art thou she asks…)
    takes his lovely SB to Faire Frou Frou or Nancy Meyers for La Perla or Eres, which would soon be modeled especially for him. And of course well what girl wouldn’t love a luscious pair of CL’s! We then partake of champagne, maybe strawberries whipped creme and chocolate truffles….and well a very special sugary good time soon follows course…

  568. Lisa Marie says:

    SF SD That is to funny. Yet so true!

  569. sd sf you are too funny, Really preplexed about the shoes!

  570. SF SD says:

    > L’amant Imaginaire – “I’m just saying, lots of straps? I’ve had guys complain even about removing a strapless bra let alone three strap mary jane heels.”

    Guys complained about removing a bra? Removing bras is fun, and the skills involved should be in the portfolio of your average high school graduate.

    One of the nice things about women is that they wear different clothes than men do. Taking them off provides myriad opportunities for discovery and learning.

    Still haven’t decided whether the shoes should stay on or off.

  571. DesertBunny says:

    Good Morning!

    There is a Yiddish Proverb that states: “If you are bitter at heart, sugar in the mouth will not help you.”

    So true. I’m all for a lil’ sugar-coating… but total ‘lip service’… so transparent 😉

  572. SF SD says:


    Sorry, I got a little sloppy with my typing. The first line “in quotes” is yours. The (Yo, ginaZ) was giving you credit for it — and also a shout-out.

    The separate reality part, which should have been separated by a blank line, was mine. In any case, I think we are in agreement.


  573. ginaZ says:

    Hi everyone just peering in before I dash with my little guy to school. Kat good luck on your prospects you seem like a great gal! A shout out to OCSB wherever you are!
    Happy lurker you always make me happy when I read your posts 😉


    “The reality is there would be no sugar if there wasn’t money, gifts and frivolity.” (Yo, ginaZ.) Sugar is a separate reality, but it’s agreed upon and mutually created. “Lie” is not the word.

    I never said lie you chose that word not I. Not sure where the “Yo” came from either? Maybe it’s semantics, but from my vantage point, and the site being what it is I’m also a realist. The “fantasy” is predicated by those things I mentioned. Sometimes it’s an illusion/fantasy and sometimes feelings enter into the equation. I’ve had both experiences. But now I seek out only someone where there IS a strong connection or chemistry. But as I’ve always said I’d trade it all in, a Gazillionare in a arrangement
    for a man with whom I love and cherish who has far far less. But this is just my opinion
    dear sir.

  574. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Sugar Diplomat SD:

    Merci for taking the time you read them.

    I will gladly post more for you (and everyone else) to read!!!!!!!!!

    It is very lovely to have someone who cares about you, but doesn’t want to take over your life. I refer to it as a “faux mance” because like a faux fur coat, it looks just as nice as the same thing, but you’re not hurting an animal to wear it. I’d like to think I’m not hurting my SD’s personal life and we can still enjoy each other’s “spots” 😉


  575. Lisa Marie says:

    Good Morning Sugars.
    New to the board. New to the site. thought I would come and say hey in the blogs.

  576. SugarDiplomat SD says:

    Would love to post more often here but between work and spoiling myself by pampering my exclusive SB it is hard to find the free moments to even read the blog, let alone participate. But I had to at least say thank you to L’amant Imaginaire for taking the time to share her comments and hopefully post more.

    I am in the same situation but from the SD point of view, and currently in a sugared NSA relationship with the same sort of strong feelings, too.

  577. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Happy Lurker~ oh no! socks in bed I think not! but heels and boots are always fun!
    NyaSockret~Not sure he would of told anyone, but yeah a little creepy when a someones father mail you! This is a discreet site, there shouldn’t have been a need for you to delete your account.
    As for meeting someone you know in “public” while on a sugar date, He can always be an acquaintance, a work person you know… there is always something to say. I’m not a good lier (not sure how to write that word this morning) and I always said he was someone that I knew from work from out of town! always worked for me!

    Have a happy day everyone!

    Talk soon

  578. Happy Lurker says:

    Good morning !
    “Whoever made the rule that the shoes have to come off ”
    “I am a big fan of keeping them on”, she writes.
    In that case I will keep my socks on. Lol !
    It is always nice to begin the day with a laugh.

  579. NyaSockret says:

    Giselle – “As a newbie, I’m very worried about being found out by family or friends that wont understand this and think it’s prostitution, etc. Have any sugars out there been “found out” or had close calls? Have any of your met pot SDs or SBs that were less than discreet? ”
    My good friends father messaged me on SA. I had never thought about this happening… didn’t know what to do… so I deleted my account and pretended like it never happened. I was a bit creeped out that he messaged me (I had my face picture up) but more so worried that he would tell someone. I would recommend thinking of a “just in case plan” because you never know..

  580. Gemini29 says:

    Just jumping in here real quick before bed, but…naughty bits in an email is just…inappropriate. Its says everything about what he is looking for…only sex. (IMO). Blockity block block in my book.

  581. SugaCaneBby says:

    Marie- The one where guys think that just because they’re “well-endowed” that they’re the ish in the sack. That’s all he was trying to advertise, sexual prowess. Kibbles’n’Bits in an initial email is a real turn-off.

  582. NJLady says:

    Evening or Morning, Sugar’s…I’m up late doing homework….L’amant Imaginaire I like what you wrote, hope you don’t mind but I borrowed a little of it….I haven’t heard from the pot SD I was chatting with so maybe he found someone else…however I have a back up, had to figure out a way to get around the “naughty fun” and start chatting about interest….oh, wait…that’s one of his interest…lol This and homework are too much to deal with….Bye for now Sugar’s

  583. MarieSB says:

    Well I am having a hard time staying awake so have a good night lovelies!

  584. MarieSB says:

    Night Sweety

    What’s your gripe SugaCane?

  585. SugaCaneBby says:

    Lol, Marie’s situation brings me back to my current gripe. Oy vey.

  586. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    I’m off,good night all !

  587. MarieSB says:

    SF SD- LOL I like your reasons given!

  588. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    SF SD~ I think it’s way too much info to send a photo or your “package” on the first photo mail….

  589. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    SF SD his raincoat is at the cleaners lmao

  590. SF SD says:

    But glad you got a good laugh out of it. :-)

  591. SF SD says:

    > Marie SB – “Yes we do need insight…. why would you sent a picture of your package??? ”

    I wouldn’t. But someone else might because:

    a. He is a jerk.
    b. His raincoat is at the cleaners.
    c. He doesn’t have a life.

    There is no quid pro quo implied.

    Sorry. I’m with Kat on this one. Block and move on. :-(

  592. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    yeah it is true! Where is everyone at?

  593. MarieSB says:

    Haha…thats funny but oh so true

  594. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    I know….What are they thinking???? My thoughts are that since they want to see are boobs right away they think we want to see the “package”. And men think theirs is the best so….. no matter how small or big!

  595. MarieSB says:

    Yes we do need insight…. why would you sent a picture of your package??? Especially so soon

  596. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Marie~ I don’t know! We need SD insight, where are all the SDs tonight?

  597. MarieSB says:

    Sweety- Bacon and eggs?? Did he make a smiley face with it haha? That’s interesting…I wonder what his thought process was as he was setting up for the pic

  598. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Marie~ I’m so curious now! hope he answers soon lmao
    on this other site, I got a guy send me this photo of his penis in bacon and eggs….. I haven’t eaten bacon and eggs since lmao

  599. MarieSB says:

    Sweety- (sigh) ya I was re-reading the profile and I’m skeptical, but I’ve heard of some SB’s finding great SD’s so we shall see. The reply I sent will let me know if he is fake or not…stay tuned

  600. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    MarieSB~ I think it might just be a little flaky! lmao

  601. MarieSB says:

    Sweety- HAHA yes it was nice….the abs were amazing too….so let’s see where this goes. It good be something promising or a flake

  602. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Wow, I just re read myself, sorry everyone, I’m tired lol

  603. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    MarieSB~ lmao, I’m sorry… At least you talked to him first? lol, I got my first penis mail on another site and I hadn’t even talked to the guy lol..And it was tiny lmao. Was his nice? lmao sorry couldn’t help myself…. i’m killing myself laughing here ….
    Men, some not all, think we need to see it! I think it’s not something you send with your photo…. I think it’s weird!

  604. good one marie shoulda asked what was thas…..block!!!!

  605. MarieSB says:

    Ok I got over my initial shock and replied haha….I don’t have patience…I should work on that lol

  606. MarieSB says:

    Good evening everyone!


    This new pot SD sent me some pics, he is attractive but in the pics was a picture of his package. I’m shocked…should I be?

  607. good point SF SD! never thought about if you Run into folks you Know!

  608. SF SD says:

    > NYC SB – “whoever made up the rule that the shoes have to come off??? Im a big fan of keeping them on…”

    I’ve been thinking about this for an hour, and I still haven’t decided.

  609. i go to CL to laugh at the looneys

  610. SF SD says:

    > Giselle – “As a newbie, I’m very worried about being found out by family or friends that wont understand this and think it’s prostitution, etc. Have any sugars out there been “found out” or had close calls? Have any of your met pot SDs or SBs that were less than discreet? ”

    Giselle, sorry no one else picked up on this. I’ve been very fortunate to find SBs who understood this and acted with discretion. I would not have stayed with them otherwise. For them, my being married was a plus, because it reassured them that I would not be making bf-type demands on their time and their emotions.

    If your SD is married, and he’s writing you from home with his regular email account and running up the family phone bill, then he hasn’t learned the basics. Beyond that, it’s up to the two of you what you’ll do and where and how you will be seen.

    I think most of us find that we need to talk about this with someone — a trusted friend, an online pal.

    Sooner or later you’ll run into someone you know when you least expect it. So at least be ready to introduce your sugar in some plausible way without stammering or blushing.

  611. marie these fammiles trying to handle the kids

    Suga its like that all over the country its about blending and adjusting… and some understanding

  612. SugaCaneBby says:

    Browsing craigslist, there’s a “SD” who specifies that he wants the chick he entertains to be “Blonde with big breasts, real or fake”. My bestie is from Orlando and he’s pretty well adjusted so I don’t believe the whole of Florida is racially challenged. I have a few more friends from that area as well and they do talk about this “Line” where if you live below it, you’ll get trouble.

    Eh. Anyway…watching America’s Funniest Videos. Going to make dinner in a little.

  613. I am in Fla hun I do have something to say but I wont!!
    Nyc you achey?

  614. Olivia says:

    what’s on abc, Kat?

  615. SF SD says:

    Would you withhold certain info in a sugar-arrangement that you’d otherwise be honest & upfront about in a ‘traditional’ relationship?

    At the beginning there’s good reason for a little caution. After you get to you know each other, you exchange the information that makes the arrangement work. In my most recent experience, we told each other a lot, but we had developed a good deal of trust by that time. Still, there things that we don’t need to know, don’t want to know, or are just irrelevant to a sugar experience.

    Are sugars expected to be as forthcoming about their personal feelings as those in traditional relationships?

    As Honey and several others mentioned, there’s some fantasy in all this. It’s time to play. But underneath, you need to be happy with your sugar if it’s going to work.

    Is ‘lie’ too strong a word for simple sugar-sweetness?

    “The reality is there would be no sugar if there wasn’t money, gifts and frivolity.” (Yo, ginaZ.) Sugar is a separate reality, but it’s agreed upon and mutually created. “Lie” is not the word.

  616. SugaCaneBby says:

    Kat, like I said I live in the deep south where there are hardly any people of color so naturally, no one is really open to the idea which is fine with me because I’m not open to back woods types myself, LOL.

    I’d like to relocate to the north, but I work on a rotating schedule and even for those that say they’re open to long distance arrangements for the time being, I feel I may not be candid enough for them. May have to wait until I move to hope for any type of success.

    I’ll be sending you an email in a bit.

  617. oh my is anybody looking at abc ?

  618. NY how are you? did you go to the doc? I been thinking about you hoping and praying this cold leaves just as Qiuck as it came!

  619. Suga this site is completly diffrent
    I feel outta place on diffrent, no
    I havent any nudes no Iam not taking… delete!! block, That is the whole convo,

    i am just a miffed though that dude came at me hard I was half brushng him off because he started in on
    I like a thick broad, I said a broad huh, being a little to *Sexual over the phone* then he Re-read my profile, and then he Switched Gears on me. I was a little shy that I was so blunt in my essay! and he says so Tell me What is it that you are meaning Sugarbaby. Lord I really thought it was bad because he just never heard of it like that!
    So he says so that mean I get to come up there I get a good meal and you and I can go to the Beach and there Will NEVER be any arguing??
    I said yes he said oh yeah Thats worth 3k to me, i hope thats Enough, can I come on fri!!! I said ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh how about you give me your name* I had to be blushed up* oh I was completly thrown for a loop!

  620. NYC SB says:

    Now here are my two cents – writing from my bed as I am drinking hot hot hot tea –

    It takes a while to find a bf gf and it takes just as long to find an sd sb relationship that works… sure you can have a fling but to find a good relationship or an arrangement it takes time and effort…keep your heads up ladies… usually with SA when it rains it pours 😉

  621. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Nite Nico!

  622. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Nico~ Yes that would be the ideal SD….

    SE~ If I could find one good SD, that won’t fall in love at first sight, Be realistic, and intelligent, someone I could have fun with, and have my allowance.You know Friends with Benefits!, it would be amazing! But, it’s getting hard!

  623. Suga Im having the same thing too! but its ok hey e-mail me girl
    Keya 703at the yaho

  624. SuthrnExec says:

    Nite Nico!

  625. SugaCaneBby says:

    That was the wrong smiley too…the first one. :s

  626. SuthrnExec says:

    Sweety, just keep steady – all that glitters is not gold. The right SD who appreciates a classy, confident lady will find you. There are a lot of detracters out there that draw a lot of attention initially and then crash and burn. Remain steady and consistent. Believe me, I don’t think it’s because of any shortcoming on your part so don’t take it personally.

  627. Nico says:

    sorry to run already *hugs* sweety, good night Lisa and sweet dreams SE :)


  628. SugaCaneBby says:

    Haha, I didn’t make the comment to put it as the main focus of the blog! 😡 I just wanted to know if anyone thought the same way. Injecting some logic. Letting people know that women aren’t stumps and chopping away with a large axe isn’t all it takes to make firewood. I didn’t mean to imply that EVERYONE was like that either.

    (wow @ my analogy)

    Anyway…browsing the site and losing hope because I am geographically undisireable to people who are in locations that actually may go for me aesthetically. Darn. I’m going to keep trying though. :)

  629. Nico says:

    Oh…and my preference would be to have my ‘space’ and to have an SD in a different town/city/state….

  630. Nico says:

    I used to kid about finding my perfect mate who would be halfway across the world and would speak Chinese and then we wouldn’t be able to communicate. *sigh*

  631. lisa says:

    Many will seek, few will find

  632. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    SE~ I know but, I’ve mailed everyone in my city. Now, I’m mailing from other states and provinces and it’s a lot further so…
    I will see what will happen this time…

  633. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    I did hide the profile, and I wasn’t on the blog coz of a stalker… he got my email from me posting here on the blog. Now, I got a new name and I would never put my email or profile # on here again!
    But, even this time, it’s as disappointing as the last!

  634. SuthrnExec says:

    Evening Nico – thanks for the vote of confidence and thanks for the turn-signal as we go another direction!

    Hang in there Sweety – that just rules out one nasty SD that you know you don’t want to have anything to do with. From what I have observed, it takes a little time to ferret out the SDs/SBs that are classy ladies/gentlemen, so patience is the rule of the day.

  635. Nico says:

    Yeah, unfortunately I do. I took a break and switched to a different site for a while, was highly disappointed and then returned here and then found a SD….you’ve been gone for a while too though haven’t you? Did you hide your profile or just from the blog?

  636. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Nico~ yeah , well It was like that when I first started too… so I don’t know! I think it’s my location maybe I have no clue! I’m disappointed you know

  637. Nico says:

    Awww *hugs* sweety :) I have had my profile hidden for sometime but I’ve heard through the CNN blasts etc that there have been a flood of young/new SB’s to the site…..it just makes the haystack a little bigger….*virtual support*

  638. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Hello Sugars!!! how is everyone?
    35 mails out, one nasty reply :(
    It’s a blow to my ego!

  639. Nico says:

    ….although, I’ll admit, I would welcome the change in direction too :) Good even SE good to see you.

  640. Nico says:

    LOL….well, I’m fairly confident that you wouldn’t need to play that card to get/keep/entertain a lady….you have much more class and depth to even make that a part of a conversation :)

  641. SuthrnExec says:


    I’m almost afraid to venture into this discussion… let me know when there is a change of direction :-)

  642. Nico says:

    Haha Suga…..I know what you mean. It’s sad to think that’s what they have to lead with….

  643. Rica says:

    I hear you Sugacane! I tell you…I dont think some guys really understand what this site is about!

  644. Olivia says:

    Everyone, have hope! Today was a good day for me- I was contacted by three new, interesting pot SDs! I was also called by two other pot SD’s who I have had contact with, but hadn’t heard from in a few days! It’s raining men!

    I had been feeling a bit discouraged…but just when you think you’re down, life always surprises you.

    I know that I am being super duper cheesy right now, but I feel like we are all worthy. We shouldn’t let me feelings about ourselves depend on how other people on SA react or don’t react at all to us. That goes for everyone here. Just keeping pushing along…that’s the moral of the story.

  645. SugaCaneBby says:

    Sorry if that sounded snarky, but I’m coming across a lot of profiles mentioning how “well-hung” they are and it’s like “And?”. Shallow shallow shallow shallow shallow.

    Wrong place to look for depth though. *sigh*

  646. SugaCaneBby says:

    What is it about men who think that just because they are well-endowed that this automatically makes them good in bed? That’s like saying that since I’m black, I am automatically good at freestyling. *rolls eyes*

  647. Flo Rida says:

    Kat – IF you can make the right decisions at the right time there is no such thing as too soon. IF you need more information to decide to meet him then simply ask for the information. How long does it take to make a decision – if he’s talking $3k and you’re happy with that go for it (but be prepared to answer what he’s going to get for $3k) and btw get it in advance. Good luck and congratulations.

  648. Flo Rida says:

    PS NYSB hope you feel better.
    PPS Gemini29 don’t be nervous – think he’s lucky to meet you! Good luck

  649. Flo Rida says:

    Hello all. Just got back from one of the islands – nice sugar trip. I work in sales and I think I’m sold. It went well. Couple of thoughts – if PayPal or a money order to a PO Box don’t work – a SD can always reserve a car under his Hertz Gold reservation and list you as an additional driver. Hertz won’t always do it but with some persuasion they will. With respect to the other question on $1,500 versus $3-5k my response is ‘there are many ladies who can entertain you at that amount, I’m not one of them, I’m a unique decadent splurge (edit as appropriate) good luck in your search.’ Cheers everyone.

  650. SugaCaneBby says:

    LOL Katrina! He must really like you! But if you feel it’s going to fast, let him know you’d like to take it a bit slower.

  651. Rica says:

    Ok Kat do your thing girl! Hey what do you think about my SD probs? I dont really want to talk anymore. I feel he knows what Im talking about so stop trying to draw this out by asking me to call! Also what sites do you run their names through?

  652. Boston I love how you did stick to your numbers. I still cant get past how he charged asinst you the Hotel…

    So just to confim what I already think, I said I was looking for an arrangment, and he startgoing into wanting to be like a boyfriend, he was asking awful personal Questions. and you know me I started talking Dollars! I figure I wasnt giving this a second thought anyway, but it didnt Rattle him I got him up to 3k*which is crazy* and he wants to come see me fri,
    I wanted to be pursued but wooo this is too fast.
    am I getting cold feet ya think?

  653. bbdoll sb says:

    nyc sb i’d love to see your profile! ive browsed at women’s profiles who have a higher allowance amount but most are just one or two sentences or they women come off as arrogant. i need to see the right balance and you seem to have gotten it down lol

  654. Rica says:

    Hello everyone!!! I haven’t left a msg in a while…I have been reading though lol. Well hope you all are doing well…I have gotten a few emails. I wanted to thank NC gent again for the help! I think the one sd with whom I could see myself clicking with seems like he is on the wrong site. He seems like he is more looking for a friend with benefits with out having to help a suga out. I have spoken with him on the phone and through email. When the email came out about looking for financial help it seemed like he may have not been down. Come on though, why do you think we are on here? We are not looking for a bf…or here to give our time and sugar away for nothing! Help me out SBs

  655. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Good evening Gemini29 and Miz Red:

    I have an SD and I left my allowance as open negotiable but made it very clear in the box below what I was looking for and what I was not looking for. I think if you put an amount, make sure you are detailed in your description of type of arrangement I’m seeking, and I’m not suggesting unload your financial woes because I’ve seen girls make the mistake of doing that just simply state one of two things:

    If you put open negotiable an idea might be:

    I know what I’m worth and it’s up to you to see if I’m worth it so send me a message……… I can guarantee a great relationship and if you message me in the first five minutes I’ll throw in the complete 9 piece set. FREE!!!!!!

    Okay just kidding about that 9 piece set part but the first sentence is a good one.

    If you have a specific amount (i.e. 3-5 k) an idea might be:

    I’m looking for a guy who can help make my life fun and my
    life a lot easier and if you feel we have some commonality based
    on what you read and feel like this amount is something you can
    invest in a great person who’s definitely worth it, then take a chance
    and send me a message.

    As far as the messages I’ve received the guys have usually left it up to me to discuss the schematics and then made a decision based on that……. some have used amounts they gave previous SBs as a jumping off point as well, but if they are newbies, maybe take a look at some of the bloggers previous posts and say, “well I’m new to this as well, but I’ve noticed that the average based on speaking to other SB’s with arrangements is XXX.”

  656. Gemini29 says:

    Miz-Red – Yes editing anything on your profile causes it to be out of commission for about 24 hours, so if you want to edit, be thorough and editing everything you need to edit at once so you aren’t constantly not viewable.

    I put an amount….I find that this probably cuts down on the lowballers and the guys who just want a dinner date. Of course I have yet to find if this works…I don’t have a SD yet. 😉

    For the other lovelies on the blog, what do you all do? Amount X-XX or Amount Negotiable? I am curious about this and what kind of responses you have to allowance requests.

  657. Miz_Red says:


    – When u edit 1 section of ur profile…does it cause it all to be un-viewable?
    I want to edit a few things.

    – Is it better to choose specifically what type of “allowance” you are seeking, or to leave it open?


    xoxo -Red

  658. NYC SB says:

    on and off since march

  659. bbdoll sb says:

    nyc sb how long have you been on the site? ive only been on a few weeks but dont get responses from sds i message, and im pretty picky about who i contact!

  660. NJLady says:

    Ok….rewote my profile….Let’s see what happens. Thanks again SB’s

  661. ~*Kitty*~ says:

    Good Afternoon Everyone!
    Haven’t been around in a long time! Glad to see some familiar faces! Hope everyone is well… to answer the blog Qs:

    Would you withhold certain info in a sugar-arrangement that you’d otherwise be honest & upfront about in a ‘traditional’ relationship?

    I would hold back wrt talking about past relationships and any emotions related to those. There’s no need for baggage in Sugar World.

    Are sugars expected to be as forthcoming about their personal feelings as those in traditional relationships?

    A sugar relationship is no different than any other relationships (intimate or not) there’s a level of personal feeling that must be contained and level to share. I think it depends a lot on the level of emotional intimacy.

    Is ‘lie’ too strong a word for simple sugar-sweetness?

    No, a lie is a lie…

  662. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Bonjour everyone, wow I go for a dinner meeting with a client and come back and the blog picks up big time.

    MarieSB and Gemini29- It’s okay I can teach you a bit of french not to worry.

    Dani- Merci beaucoup!!!!! Paris is very enchanting and lovely, I should suggest if you get an SD that you really like to have him take you here.

    Boston SB- I don’t even know you and I’m convinced you are worth more than that loser realises and you clearly did the right thing to stand your ground and walk away. People are like art, they are priceless, and it’s hard enough to come up with the logicistics in an arrangement knowing this and I hope you know you set an example for all the ladies new and not so new to this to NEVER settle, always be confident. Trust me, men will have so much more respect for you. I don’t mean to tell an SD to give you £20,000 but I’m merely suggesting that you make sure you tell potentials that you know you are a special person and that you have a lot to offer and all you want in return is a fair amount to reconcile that. Hold your head up beautiful!!!

    NJ Lady, haven’t got to look at your profile but I’m sure you’ve recieved a lot of advice and these women are lovely and the gents aren’t too bad either so your in good hands.

  663. SuthernExec says:

    Boston, so what if he does? What could he say – other than lie about it and try to make himself look good??

  664. Happy Lurker says:

    Thanks all,
    I just read the blog and had a great time. It is funny and funky !
    Some time ago I was really sad with all those remarks about $$$$$$$
    A man can only be interesting, if he has loads of it.
    As an SD it makes me wonder, does my SB like me as a person or just as a person with a handsome purse.
    Then Sonnet 138 crossed my mind.
    I borrowed it to express in a few minutes how I experience an SB.
    To be honest I am very satisfied with that bit about the ” untutored blogger” A hilarious invention, if I may say so.
    “You focus too much on the sex part” some one writes. How true.
    I had the honour of spending time with a few SBs, but it seems to be an art to make a man feel like a king in bed. An art they had not mastered.
    At present I have an SB (more or less). Also not well versed in the art.
    Yet I hold her in high esteem. Besides being a great student, she works as a volunteer in a hospice.
    At present life is not a bed of roses for her, so I function as her bridge over troubled water. That gives me a feeling of contentment.
    You see there are so many different mutualities in the relationships of Sd and SB. Mine is funny ! Funny haha, as well as funny peculiar.

  665. BostonSB says:

    Thanks for the support everyone!

    He even had the nerve to say that I was going in the blog. I beat him to it!

  666. NJLady says:

    Thank NYCSB…..You’re making sense…I get in about the “kinky” part, that’s why the SD, who wrote to about “naughty fun”…said (you) meaning me, know why you’re here”…I get now!

    Gemini 29…Thanks for the compliment on the picture….

    Oay, start off positive not negative-take out, “Submissive and Dominant”-also lon term. and “kinky part”;Move “can’t travel+schedule section to bottom.

    I’ll try this again….Thank you both.

  667. SuthernExec says:

    BostonSB, the only thing you can be accused of doing wrong is talking to him for as long as you did! Apparently, he sees the “I’m Seeking” $x amount as something to negotiate and when he discovers that you’re not negotiating, he is either embarrassed or insulted – which drives him to insult you.

    Besides his math being a bit off, he doesn’t seem to believe what he reads either! Does he believe everything else in your profile BUT the $ amount?? hmmmm

  668. NC Gent says:

    Heya BostonSB — wow weekly meeting for $1500 per month — that would be an awesome deal for him – I wish him good luck in finding someone will to take that little amount. Sorry you had to endure that.

    Best wishes in your search!

  669. Gemini29 says:

    Boston SB – My financial expectations are 3-5k too, and really its on the 5k firm side. I had a guy offer me $1000 a month for meeting once a week. I turned down an arrangement with him darn quick (actually I turned it down for another reason, but this topped it like a cherry). He had the nerve to ask why, and I didn’t respond. If a guy cannot respect the financial amount a girl wants and tries to lowball her, any further discussions about amount would probably lead to a rant like that. I’m sorry that happened to you, and yes you should stick to your guns and don’t let anyone put you down for it. He could have just said he couldn’t afford that and let the issue go.

  670. Miz_Red says:


    They’re interviewing Sugarbabies!

    Im watching right now!
    (& im in NJ)

  671. BostonSB says:

    I just feel the need to repost this because I feel it’s so ridiculous.

    So just now I called “insane” after the potential offered me less than half of my financial expectations.

    I have a theory to discuss this stuff before I meet the SD, because I don’t want to waste either of our time.

    However, my financial obligation says 3-5k, and he offered me 1500. When I asked him if he knew what my obligations were, he did.. and then called me insane for that?

    Take a look at this convo and tell me what I did wrong. names changed to protect the (not so) innocent.

    SD: weekly meeting, stipend of $1500 per month cash
    me: did you look at my profile/financial expectations?
    SD: $3k – $5k per month? is that what you said?
    me: yep
    SD: and that’s firm – your expectaton then is to get $4,000 per month for meeting once a week in a $300 per night hotel in Boston?
    me: i’m not trying to come off as rude or anything. i’m actually quite nice.
    SD: $4000 + $1200 per month = $5200 a month, 12 months makes that a $68,000 per year job
    before taxes
    SD: after taxes that is about $110,000 salary and we’ve not even met as of yet
    SD: well, good luck with that
    withut even meeting me
    you ask for $110k
    me: i didn’t ask for that
    SD: you’re going in the blog!
    me: that was all you
    SD: I wish you all the best
    bye for now
    me: i only asked if you looked at my expectations
    haha, alright guy
    SD: insane

    I have my expectations and will not settle for less! and I refuse to be put down because of them.

  672. Gemini29 says:

    NYC SB – awww…. You sound like you need sleep badly, and getting better even faster! Hopefully your Harvard boy can do you some good!

    NJ Lady – Aw, what a great picture! Beautiful smile!

    In the about you section, I would start with the “I’m a bright, intelligent lady…” and move the “Can’t travel +schedule section” to the bottom of your “about me”. You want to start with the positives about you not lead in with the negatives. I would take out the Submissive/Dominant thing, it kinda detracts.
    In the “seeking for” section I would…maybe reword what you are trying to say. Maybe say that you are seeking a real companion and friend, chemistry is important to you, and if the possibility of a longer term arrangement comes up, this would be of interest to you. I have noticed a few guys out there who want a longer term thing…more guys than you would think actually. And take out the nothing kinky thing…it won’t stop those type of guys anyway.

    Otherwise your profile seems really nice and shows you are a true lady with a good head on your shoulders with direction in life. I think a full body picture and another headshot would serve you well. Good luck! 😀

  673. NYC SB says:

    Nj lady — you focus too much on the sex part… nothing kinky would be a turn off for an sd… not submissive or dominant (arent we always one or the other)… plus the talk about something long term … thats probably where you loose them all … most men are married and the ones that arent are not looking for anything serious… so now you have narrowed down the SA pool to couple of people who are looking for a relationship…

    sorry maybe im not making sense… but im not thinking clearly enough to form coherent sentences

  674. NYC SB says:

    Hi guys! Thank you for the well wishes… I feel worse today than I did yesterday… I think I need to call my other doctor… you know the one that graduated from Harvard (my pseduo bf) for a house call

    what Pot Dr nice… yes… caring … yes… disappointed… YES!
    He did give me a vicks massage… i know sexy… got some prescriptions… we will see

    bbdollsb- thank you you are too kind! i am not the ultimate SB but every once in a while i strike gold… the key is to maintain your standards and not settle… this lesson i learned after my first arrangement… know what you want and what you are worth … most importantly know your market… reach out to the sds you like and see where it goes… LISTEN to what they need… then hook them by serving the exact things he is looking for (no im not talking sex) …

  675. bbdoll sb says:

    omg NYC SB you are an ultimate sb! do you have any tips for newbies? i get a lot of deadbeat guys :(

  676. NJLady says:

    Ladies, I need….Help!. SD’s are looking at my profile, but no is responding….except for one, but that has been it. I went back and re-wrote my profile, trying to be as open and honest as I could. I made it clear that I was not available, at this time, to travel extensively, do to the fact that I attend school in the evenings, however I’m free days and weekends. I’m working on putting up some pictures…..I don’t know….take a look at my profile and let me know if I should add or changed something….I want to say how much I’m asking for, some of the SB’s do, but I know if I ask for the arrangement I’m looking for….I’ll probably have to jump through hoops…lol

    Here is my profile#383188…joybird

    Thank you SB’s

  677. its a visa sorta like a prepaid debit card, you can get them at Cvs
    I like them because I am frighten to carry lots of money on my person.
    you can use it then put more money on it if you want or he can put monies on it if you want I figure to avoid all the my name /info I get one and I feel comfy to give that out instead.

  678. Dani says:

    Gemini- It’s a visa card that you (or someone else) can put money and you can keep putting money on it.

  679. Gemini29 says:

    Katrina – What is a reloadable visa?

  680. Gemini29 says:

    Dani – Oh I hope so! :)

  681. Dani says:

    Gemini-That was me when I met my (I guess I can call him this) SD. I was sooo nervous. I was a complete bubble though. While we were together he mentioned spending the weekend with him (at another time). I think if we get really nervous, it means we actually like the pot and that we feel like this might actually develop into something.

  682. Gemini29 says:

    Dani – Oh I have good feelings about this one, but still…the nerves are there. Big time. Luckily I’ve gotten good about not showing my nerves…once I meet him I think I’ll be fine and my bubbly confidant self. :)

  683. Dani says:

    Gemini- Definitely stay calm. I understand being super nervous, I have been that way, but it turned out to be a good meeting! I think being nervous is a good sign.

  684. Gemini29 says:

    Suthern Exec- Is the first meeting nerve-wracking for the SD too? I’m a bundle of hot butterflies….soooo nervous! And your comment is basically how I worded my email…glad I did it right!

    (although it got rescheduled again, partly because he wouldn’t be able to get the money to me in time (silly paypal)….I think this works out for the best on both ends actually, but now I get more time to be more nervous! lolol)

  685. Dani says:

    Gemini29- I have to agree with everyone here. I would definitely ask for the money upfront. I think if you explain the reasoning, he will be fine with it. Good luck!

    Suthern- Are SDs nervous when they meet a pot SB? I remember meeting my first pot and I was soooo nervous!

    L’amant- I am currently taking French (it’s only 102) and think it is a beautiful language. I have been to France and it has to be one of my favorite places. I definitely have a soft spot for Paris though!

    NYC SB- I hope you are feeling better! I hope your doctor was good to you (even if it wasn’t what he had in mind).

    Now for my 2 cents about the discussion questions….

    Would you withhold certain info in a sugar-arrangement that you’d otherwise be honest & upfront about in a ‘traditional’ relationship?

    I think the arrangement depends on the two people. I may not be as forthcoming about certain aspects of my life, but that would be true if I was in a traditional relationship. I believe in being completely honest with people and I am not ashamed of anything that I have done in my life. With a SD I might sugar coat some of the details, still giving him the facts, but making it sound (perhaps) less crude.

    Are sugars expected to be as forthcoming about their personal feelings as those in traditional relationships?

    I would be reluctant to admit my feelings at first. I would want the SD to admit his feelings first, so that we would know that we were on the same page. I do believe that a SB should have feelings for her SD. It may take time for this to happen, but I believe it will.

    Is ‘lie’ too strong a word for simple sugar-sweetness?

    Lie is absolutely to strong a word. Even in polite conversation a person might need to sugar coat something. As far as our actions, I would not call it a lie at all. With a SD I will be very sweet to him, but that is in my nature. When a man is good and kind to me, I will ALWAYS recipricate and spoil him in everyway.

  686. Gemi you can reserve a car with a credit card at h e r t z without the liaability I used the site cars dot c o m I didnt go anywhere for my birthday Ilke i thought I was, and they didnt hit my creditcard!
    but as far as that goes I agree with NYC he can send Western Union, way too many scams going on to be gambling with monies, also what about a Reloadable visa? that is a thought!

  687. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    ginaZ~ see always look on the bright side!
    As for me…. well i’m great at saying that, but I have mailed so many…. and only got a few really bad responses! If your not interested you don’t have to be nasty you know…. just say no thanks!

    Hi SE~ how is you?

  688. SuthernExec says:

    Gemini29 – SD perspective on your question – just tell him upfront that you really would rather have the money sent to you via PayPal (or whatever) – and if you just say something like, “cash is a little tight and it would really help me out…” I don’t think he will think ill of you at all. If I were him, I would appreciate knowing because the whole first meeting thing is nerve-racking enough – if I could do something that would help ease that a bit, I want to know! Good luck!

  689. ginaZ says:

    Massage guy Part 2:

    No picture on his profile. Sends his next message about coming over to my place for a massage to see how it goes.

    Yikes! but your right sweetie gotta look on the bright side. I got mail 😉

  690. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    ginaZ~ lol at least you get messages lmao!

  691. ginaZ says:

    Oy vay. I just got a request for a massage today. Whoops for a sec I thought I was on CL 😉

  692. Sweety SB~ AKA BG says:

    Hello Sugars!

  693. Gemini29 says:

    L’amant and Marie Sb -8+ years of French language instruction, and really the only french words I know, I learned from Lady Marmalade (Moulin Rouge) “Voulez-vous couchez avec moi, ce soir?” Which isn’t something you really want to go around singing all the time…

  694. MarieSB says:

    Well lovelies I am off to get ready for another day at work! Have a great day!!

  695. MarieSB says:

    L’amant- Thank you! I love the french language! I bought Rosetta Stone to learn it but no one I know knows it :( It is such a sexy language! The accent is great too!

  696. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    MarieSB: Marie is my favourite name as I have never met anyone named Marie I didn’t like, and dahling (you cannot hear my french accent so using syntax) don’t worry, you can teach him all about it m’dear. xx

  697. MarieSB says:

    NYC- Was he at least nice and caring?

    I just saw the picsk of this pot SD I’ve been talking to and I am relieved to see he is attractive! He seems so nice and I think it might work out. This is his first relationship though so I’m hoping he truly understands how this works!

  698. Gemini29 says:

    NYC SB – !!! oh dear!! Talk about not being on the same page…

    What on earth did you do?? Because when I’m sick I tend to lose every shred of politeness….

  699. NYC SB says:

    Sooo lemme share a funny story with you guys… Remember my Dr Pot I met last week?

    So I have been under the weather and he offered his medical services. Now I asked if he does house calls. He said he does. So I told him to come over and let me know whats wrong with me. Now I am REALLY REALLY SICk… he thought I wanted to play a little dr patient fantasy… so needless to say when he came home last night he was VERY surprised to see me actually sick… oh well

  700. Gemini29 says:

    Thanks girlies! I’ll email him and see what he says, I’m sure he’ll agree, I just…don’t want to be a bother to him, but then again, I certainly don’t want to put myself in a financial hole for someone else.

    Goodmorning L’amant, NYC SB, Miz_Red! I’m better this morning, yesterday was a not so great day for me, hopefully today will move along at a better rate.

  701. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Oh and Bonjour and kisses to NYC SB and the other bloggers as well.
    It’s mid day here already so I am at work and having a slow day so I get to read the blog for a while till my next client meeting.

  702. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Gemini29: Hi darling how are you? xx

    I think the other ladies are right: get the money in advance and then
    go with a piece of mind. You don’t want that worry to be the elephant in the room that distracts you from a nice time. Bonne chance mademoiselle!!!

  703. NYC SB says:

    Gemi – paypall, western union… something… but upfront! you do not want to put yourself in a position where you will be financially hurting if he decides to flake…. explain that you are tight with finances and allow him to show you that he is sincere… by depositing money up front 😉

  704. Miz_Red says:

    Oh yea….
    & y not just let him know that it would be easier to do the tranfer thru PayPal. Quick, simple, & easy.

  705. Miz_Red says:

    Oh, no no no….
    I’d ask for it in advance only bc u don’t need to be left stranded with nothing or stuck with a car u can’t pay for. Just let him know how you feel, that you need reassurance. You’d feel more comfortable and secure if it were taken care of ahead of time.

    Good luck! & have fun!

    xoxo -Red

  706. Gemini29 says:

    Ladies and Gents may I have an opinion on this please? I’m meeting a pot SD in a few days…he’s already reserved the hotel in my name, and he has offered to take care of transportation for me, since I’ll have to rent a car. Now…he offered to send me a check to take care of incidentals, but I don’t feel comfy giving my addy out. So I told him he could take care of it once I got there, or deposit money into my paypal acct, and he didn’t say one way or the other which one he’d do. In all honesty, I’d feel more comfortable if he deposited money to cover the rental of the car into my paypal so that at least I have money to pay for it before I go down there…finances are tight on my end and if I get stuck with a car rental it is going to *hurt*.

    So onto my question…. Should I go on faith that he’ll take care of it once I get there or should I ask for X amount to be deposited so I can have peace of mind? I just do not want to seem ungrateful or that I don’t trust him, but the worry is adding to my nervousness. How would the experienced SBs phrase this to their SD?

  707. Miz_Red says:

    Thanks *Gem*…
    I just had 1 pot SD who was really sweet, we made plans to meet. He only lives about an hr and a half away from me, we talked on th’ phone and thru IM, and he even paid my phone bill and paid a little extra! And then *POOF*…..he disappeared. I was a little disappointed bc he seemed to be a really sweet guy, we got along really well [so far], and that was a really nice gift. But….I guess he got “cold feet”…lol. This “beatings” guy….im not to sure. Lol.

    xoxo -Red

  708. Gemini29 says:

    Miz_Red – I’ve run into a bunch of those guys, and when I say, ok, but I have to meet you first, when are you willing to fly out here, they always skipout and I never hear from them again. One guy wrote me back an email of “questions” he wanted me to answer, each question got more and more graphic and descriptive. He was basically looking to get off on my response, and I wasn’t playing that game. So I don’t know, on two fronts…first…if its not your thing, then pass on it. Secondly, in my experience they always *poof*, but that could be because of me. *shrugs*

  709. Gemini29 says:

    Sincere SD – Those are some great tips, thank you! I will def be looking up the 45 speed dating questions before my date tomorrow night (eeeeeiiiii!!).

    I think this is important for SDs and SBs alike:
    If you are communicating through IM or email, use proper sentences and english. Save the IM slang and short notes for later.

    Us girls like men who can write like men too, not like 14 year old boys. :)

  710. Miz_Red says:

    Ok ladies…
    Get this one…
    I’ve emailed back/forth 4 times with a SD. Some parts of the arrangement DO meet my criteria well….but here’s th’ catch- he says he likes to be “used” by women in odd ways. He wants a SB to financially support in return for her to take her anger, stresses, & frustrations out on him by walking, jumping, and/or stomping on him……WHAT?!?!?! O_o? So im guessing he’s into the kinky, “whip me”, type of stuff. I told him I really don’t find myself needing to relieve stress, etc, in that way- unless its in the midst of a heated arguement or something. Does this sound serious? Has anyone ever heard of this? What should I say to him? What should I dooooo??? Bc like I said, the rest sounds great- no sex or nudity involved, NSA, just friends, & “beatings”. Lol.

    xoxo -Red

  711. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    Hey Sincere SD, this is great advice!!!! Especially coming from a bloke.

    My only thing is number 8: I think that really practising answers can lead to insincerity and perhaps the best thing to do is just be yourself, be earnest and don’t be misleading. If you like specific films and books, and someone asks you about your favourite books and films, do you really need to rehearse that? Just keep it casual. That aspect of a date doesn’t change whether it’s traditional or an arrangement, I would be turned off I found I was having a rehearsed conversation….. I like fluid conversation that really stems from something avant garde not necessarily about an arrangement at all in the beginning. But that’s just me. I think the part to be prepared about answering is why you are here where you want to go in life, how this situation can help and how an SD can mutually benefit from an arrangement with you. Those are concrete questions and have concrete answers no matter whom you are speaking with.

    Obviously this is just my opinion so don’t throw daggers at me, but I can see a lot of time went into that advice and hope a lot of people read it and take what they need from it.


  712. SincereSD says:

    Some other relevant data:
    96 – # of premium SD in my area; this represents a ratio of 8:1 premium SD to active SB
    16 – # of appearances on SB favorites list

    Observations and recommendations based on my search:

    1. Ladies, don’t be shy about sending email to a SD that you are interested in. There are a lot of SB profiles and the SD may have missed your profile. Adding yourself to someone’s favorite list doesn’t guarantee a reply or that you will be noticed.
    2. To increase your chances of being seen and appear near the top of profile searches, login and out everyday.
    3. IM is not a good method to connect unless you agree on a specified time to chat. I have not been able to contact 20% of the respondents through IM.
    4. About half the profiles did not contact any useful information or more than a few lines of text. I passed on the majority of these unless the picture had a great smile.
    5. Your first or top picture is the most important as it appears in your profile summary.
    6. Use an alternative name or email for the initial replies until you establish some common ground. I was able to find information about several SB using their email address or name through the social networking sites like Facebook, Linkedin, etc. Some of the information I found on FB caused me to break off discussions.
    7. The majority of SB profiles in their early 20’s and are mostly first timers. Although I contacted many SB below my desired age range, being in your 30’s is not a disadvantage
    8. Be prepared for SD discussions – think of an SD discussion or meeting as an interview; prepared to talk about yourself convincingly and concisely. Also google “45 speed dating questions” and practice your answers; as well as, use them in your discussions.
    9. Be positive and be prepared to invest a bit of time – first impressions are important. Just because you had a bad date or talked to a timewaster doesn’t mean the next person will do the same. “Are you for real?” or “How much are you offering?” is not a good way to greet a potential SD. If you are communicating through IM or email, use proper sentences and english. Save the IM slang and short notes for later.

  713. SincereSD says:

    I have heard a lot of subjective comments about people’s searches on SA but have never seen any quantitative information. In order to clarify my curiosity, I scanned through my email folders and created a summary of my search results over the past 30 days. It shows some interesting data and it would be great to see similar information from others.

    125 – estimated # of unique emails sent

    30% or 38 – estimated # of unique emails received
    22% or 28 – # of unread emails
    48% or 59 – # of non-response (emails read but no reply)

    Other information
    8 – # of missed connections on IM/chat
    8 – # of broken connections via email (followup or chemistry)
    197 – # of unique profile views
    11 – # of unsolicited emails received
    800 – estimated # of active SB profiles in my area (login within last 30 days)

    I’m add my observations in subsequent note.

  714. L'amant Imaginaire says:

    SugaCane: I had to get some pics taken of me just for my profile when I first started. I guess because of the fact I’m a bit well known, I blurred my face in my pictures or took ones that are strategically to where you can’t see my face entirely but can breath a sigh of relief that I’m not Quasimodo. Just keep in mind what level of discretion you want when taking new photos.

    OhioSB: When I first met my current SD, I used the three step program:

    a) He messaged me on SA and I looked at his profile, made sure I was at least interested enough to make initial contact. (I was.)

    b) We had a little chat (on our personal addresses, which don’t forget to use a discreet email address as well, even if you don’t think you need one, SAFETY FIRST on and off seeking arrangement.) We discussed a little about ourselves, our interests, what brought us to SA, shared some witty banter, and from there decided to meet for a drink. (this is just how i did it, it’s not the right way but I did snag a great man so there you have it) I know you had concerns about not revealing too much: NYC SB brought up a good point to NOT reveal your real name till you are 100% an arrangement is going to happen. Be generic about your job and maybe specific about your interests. You might be a specialist in a medical field or a student at a specific university: just simply state you are a student studying XYZ or you work in the medical field. Give more details when you feel comfortable, which for me was in person. I think you are safe to discuss favourite foods, etc. Things that give you commonality which is important in an arrangement.

    c) What I did is this: I met my SD at a stylish and discreet place for an early evening cocktail. I said, let’s do this: If we get on and we decide we like each other after the drink, let’s move on to dinner. That way you’re not stuck having a meal with someone you have no rapport with. Well obviously I did fancy my SD and he made it to dinner and the next night he got dessert :)
    (literally, LOL) It wasn’t till dinner that we brought up the fiscal and physical parts of an arrangement. I don’t know Ohio (I had to look it up, I live in Europe) but I would think you could adapt what I did or what some of the other ladies suggest to your local and your comfort zone but that’s my advice.

    Marie SB: I absolutely understand what you are saying with the photos, I’ve had that run in once or twice as well. The funniest was with a gentleman who told me he looked like George Clooney that all his staff at work told him.
    All I can say is that his staff must be underpaid to be paying compliments to their boss like that………… I think partly it might stem from the fact that maybe a prior SB or run ins with gold diggers might inflate this fantasy they have of being “attractive” when they are not. In the SB’s case, maybe feelings developed and he appeared more attractive, or in a GD’s case, his money and other materials made him look a mirror image to Brad Pitt. (Which I don’t at all fancy to be honest.)


  715. Vixen says:

    Goodnight Kat!!

  716. any way While Iam on a Highnote goodnight!!
    Oliva,vixen,stilllooking,Gina, Seen and unseen!
    bye Guys!