9 years ago
Sugar in the Middle

9 years ago
Sugar in the Middle

All things in life are naturally balanced, albeit not always evenly. In ‘traditional’ relationships, each partner must balance their love life with work, school, family and endless other variables.

College, kids, boyfriends, wives, and careers are just a fraction of what many sugars balance day after day.

Sugar can be the perfect glazing between a stressful love life and career, as many here have said, “I’m seeking someone to take the stress away” , and there’s no doubt that sugars have been known to do just that.

I would like my SD to take my stress away. I know that I want to do that for him as well! But, just the fact that you WANT to makes a HUGE impact. – OCSugarBaby

When do you find time for sugar?

How does the sugar melt with the rest of your life?

Has a Sugar Daddy or Sugar Baby taken some of your stress away lately? Care to share?


Leave a Reply

592 Responses to “Sugar in the Middle”

  1. I have kind of a diffrent outlooks on this article. I agree with the author but some points I have diffrent views on.

  2. TexasSugah says:


    Thanks.. I wondered how that went.

  3. TexasSugah says:

    Lisa- this is just awesome!!!!!

    I tried to send you my email addy here but ut didn’t go thru.
    I’m dying to ask you a couple of questions which now begs the question,

    how do you get or give someone’s email addy????

    • OCSugarBaby says:

      Good Morning TexasSugah.
      If someone would like to share their email with another blogger, it can be arranged. In light of keeping the email exchanges off the blog, just post that you would like to share yours with “X” and it will be send. I will forward yours to Lisa. :)

  4. Lily says:

    Virgin Sugar, your questions (comments) on my blog topics were great. I went ahead and wrote pretty thorough responses on both your comments, and I’d be interested to hear from any more experienced sugars from this blog if they agreed with what I told her, or they had a vastly different approach to allowance negotiations. The articles to click on re: finding this thread of discussion on my blog is, “Going on First Dates with Potentials” and “The Perfect First Date, Now What?” if anyone has time to kill and wants to read and let me know what they think.

    I am WIDE OPEN for differing viewpoints. Again, only one month in the sugarbowl. Not an expert.

  5. Virgin Sugar says:

    Hello Sugars! I’m off work now! Woo-hoo! Back to my sugar hunt!

  6. Lisa 2 sds, 2 x-lovers, 2 apartments says:

    Hi Midwest

    Yes i’m going to have new carpeting, new fridge, new countertops, a dishwasher, a great view from the bedroom at night, across the street from mall, etc. My walk to and from the busstop will involve walking through the mall, lol

    I move on monday but my phone/internet won’t be up till tuesday but I can walk over to the mall with my laptop and sit by the fireplace and use the free wifi. Sd is going to leave me to get set up and get settled as he is busy with his business early in the week and then he’ll come over to see the new place friday. All the good restaraunts are nearby too.

  7. Matrriarch Midwest says:

    Hi Yaz!

  8. Matrriarch Midwest says:

    Lisa – You are going to feel such a sense of renewal!! I can’t wait to see what you post on Tues! You will actually have a stove/oven to use :-)

  9. LASB says:

    Congrats Lisa!!! It’s all coming together! Yay!

    Ok, off to dinner and a show! Have a great night, sugars!

  10. Lisa 2 sds, 2 x-lovers, 2 apartments says:

    Good evening everyone

    Got the keys to my new apartment today. still packing, stacked up my skirts are over 4 feet high, need more than one box, lol

    Have to pick up one of those positive screwdrivers tomorrow as I only have the negative type and can’t take down all my strip mirror headboard.

  11. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Going out for sushi now. Everyone have a fabulous night!

  12. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Hi Yaz! And thank you!

    Lily – every new endeavor in life comes with training wheels. We just have to know when to take them off and coast freely (and safely) with just two.

  13. Lily says:

    Thank you SS. I do agree with you. I just hope not to get my hopes up and then dashed agian, where this man is concerned.

    I just quickly dashed off a topic on my blog about this, with the cutest picture ever ever ever on this earth. If anyone’s bored, have a look, and then comment there or on here about how you feel re: strong feelings/things feeling traditional-dating-style + entering into an arrangement and those all-too-tricky arrangement negotiations discussions that can clearly trip up ANYONE!

    Did any of ya’ll ever imagine *me* as someone who wasn’t pushy and demanding enough to get herself some sugar with an eager man? :) I’m kind of laughing about that. I guess he was my training wheels and I learned my lesson after that……!

  14. Yaz says:

    Well said Shoogar Shoes and I am glad to see you are ok. :-)

  15. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Typo: *IF the music makes us happy…*

  16. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Well, Lily, as I have learned (and I can ONLY speak from my own experiences), it is so very important to be happy and at the end of the day, really enjoy the person you are choosing to spend time with. Re-vamping our lives is a part of the dance – it the music makes us happy. Anything really (and I mean REALLY) worthwhile in life, sometimes presents us with challenges and often times high risks – but that’s what makes them so rewarding. Dancing on the razor’s edge is a phrase you have all seen me use frequently and this is what life is about. (at least I think so…)

  17. Lily says:

    and in case anyone is about to flame me, I WOULD end my other 2 arrangements in favor of this guy. He’s different than any other guy I’ve met in a long time, and certainly one of the few SDs who I would actually feel is totally, in every way, enough for me. He’s single, open ended possibilities for things to get serious someday (not this year, given our lives, but someday), and I would just *want* to be exclusive with him for some odd reason…… *scratches head.* I didn’t even feel that way with HandsomeSD, because of all the ambiguity and his non-single status……

  18. Shoogar Shoes says:

    LASB – ha ha ha! If you and I ever meet, I have an entire “Asian Skit” with that accent! So funny you wrote it out and I knew EXACTLY what you were saying. ha ha ha. Too funny.

  19. Lily says:

    I agree, SS! I will never do that again. I was just. so. smitten.

    And he knows I found him on SA since we met. I messaged him on SA last week, in a light hearted way. He’s ignored about 5 of my correspondences (maybe 2 emails, two phone calls, and one SA message) in the last month or so, all spaced apart of course, not back to back.

    In the future I’ll never check that stuff again!!!!

    But SS – I mean, really…. what do I do if I believe I would probably like to (and be willing to) re-vamp my whole life around an arrangement with him? I emailed him back and asked if it were up to HIM, what would he prefer as a gesture…. at the tail end of a very long email which LASB thought sounded good. right LASB?

  20. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Lily – may I suggest you just don’t check to see if/when he is logging into SA? This was something that bugged me about pot SDs. No one wants to feel someone else is checking on them. It really isn’t healthy for you or the relationship. I’m sure you haven’t mentioned this to him (and please don’t ever as it seems “stalker-like”). Some things are just better not knowing, you know? Helps keep you sane.

    Yay on getting the red coat back! Looks like the solutions he offered are both in your favor. This is great news!

  21. LASB says:

    Hey may be logging into SA looking for you or trying to fill the void. Can you rebuild the trust? Maybe that’s the real question.

  22. LASB says:

    SS – Your dad has the best sayings!!!

    Really, I hate fighting itself, but I’m such a strategist at heart, that I start to get into that aspect of things. But the Asian in me is like “avoid confRict at aRL cost. No dishonoL the famiRy.” (Said/written in an Asian accent)

    Yay for your red coat and to finding resolution! :)

  23. Lily says:

    No, a continuance.

    He writes a lengthy email to me tonight to apologize for the way he froze up and avoided the whole situation with me. He explained it as his heart getting way too involved, and the whole thing feeling much more traditional-dating than NSA, and the under current of financial expectation that he didnt’ know how to address just threw him for a loop and he froze up and didn’t know how to bring it up with me.

    In short, if I had just listened to you guys mid January when you urged me to ask him directly about how and when an allowance schema would begin so I could consider the two of us ‘officially’ in ‘an arrangement’ with one another, I might be with him right now. *bangs head into wall*

    Why did I keep my mouth shut about money, and continue to woo his heart and therefore shoot myself in the foot?

    Clearly, even for those of us with superior verbal skills and ablity to communicate, we can fumble up the tricky dance of allowance negotiations and ‘arrangement specific’ talks that need to happen to get things set off on the right foot and sailing smoothly. Damn.

    He now asks if there’s anything he can do above sending me my red coat. A vacation to his city or a donation to my favorite cause were the two suggestions he gave, but said that I could consider and decide how he could somehow repair my damaged opinion of him. Clearly the first suggestion implies him seeing me, and he puts forth the second one in case i want absolutely no ties between him and me ever again (what a gentleman to give me those two options at the polar opposite ends of the spectrum in terms of how open I might be feeling towards him, and offer me to come up with any shade of grey in the middle if I choose).

    I would re-open things between us. I had strong feelings.

    However, he’s been constantly logging in to SA since I met him two months ago. Hmmmmmm……..


  24. Shoogar Shoes says:

    LASB – adding to sayings, my dad used to say, “Never bring a knife to a gun show.”

  25. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Lily – I remember when you were Taylor and the whole story. Is there an end to share?

    Jade – Nice. Those quick jokes are my favorite.

    AM – Happy to see your little laugh jump in!

    LASB – Love the bb gun vs grenade! Adding to my plethora of sayings.

  26. Lily says:

    LASB, remind me never to get on your bad side. I mean, unless it’s in a fun way. 😉

  27. LASB says:

    SS – Yeah, I was gonna say, you can do the single white pixel trick or white square, if you can’t delete, but looks like you know all my tricks already. :)

    No, falling from grace. Just a disagreement that was getting unnecessarily ugly on his end. And no explosions. I merely let him know that if he wants to fire his bb gun I have a grenade in my pocket. He got the message. I prefer to resolve things without having to “go there.” It was sickly gratifying to watch a bunch of bombs detonate as the defendants in my now finished legal war walked into my carefully crafted mine field. But really, I try to save that type of thing for extra special moments. :)

  28. Lily says:

    Anyone, anyone……? Beuller……..?

  29. Lily says:

    and if so, the whole smitten saga tale of heartbreak, woe, and Poof-ing that ensued throughout the entire first month (i.e. all of January), of my attempting a sugar arrangement that never came to pass….?

  30. Lily says:

    Does anyone else here remember me from 6 weeks ago, when I was still Taylor?

  31. LASB says:

    Jade, I’m sooo cracking up! Thanks!

  32. Anna/Molly says:

    Lol…nice one!

  33. Shoogar Shoes says:

    You’re so smart, LASB! I just realized what you mean. I tried to delete the gravatar, but then realized you can’t. So I figured out the best solution. Shouldn’t have one at all now. (Please tell me if you see one)

    Also, sorry for your bad day. Although, I must say it seems you fell with grace and got back up with even more grace. Very few women can walk away from detonating a bomb still appearing flawless and without a bead of sweat; you are clearly one of those women.

  34. Jade says:

    A wife is naked looking in the bedroom mirror. She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, “I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.”

    The husband replies, “Your eyesight’s damn near perfect.”

  35. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    Sorry I missed you and welcome to the sugar fam baby girl :)

  36. LASB says:

    SS – You might consider not having a gravatar, if you are trying to avoid association with your former identity. I don’t want to give away the spy secrets on the blog (Like I did with the right click disabled issue) so if you need me to elaborate, hit me up privately.

    Welcome to the blog, Baby Girl!

  37. LASB says:

    Hi sugars (including lurkers and newbies!)

    I’m having a rough day, so I just came by for a little escape. I hate fighting with people who think they can strong arm the seemingly powerless. This guy messed up and tried to lie about it, and then refused to even negotiate and then threatened me when I presented a more than fair solution. So I showed him the “grenade” and wow did he change his tune quickly. lol. Really though, I’d prefer if people could just be on the up and up so I don’t have to go there. I guess this is why the US makes nukes. I don’t condone it, but I see why they see it as the easy way out.

    Anyhow, at least I have something to look forward to. I have a date tomorrow with BGpotSD. I planned the whole thing and made all the arrangements for a very fun and sexy evening and I don’t want him to have to think about anything or have any stress. I really hope he likes it.

    Lone Gunman – Get well soon! Sending you positive vibes!

    Jade – Thanks for answering my question about the roller. I debated getting that because I love the stamper so much. I’ll stick to being a stampin’ fool, though. :)

  38. Lily says:

    Nice to meet you, BG!

  39. Baby Girl says:

    Hi Lily and TT! I’ve been lurking for a while, nice to finally meet you guys 😀

  40. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    The over productivity has ceased! Just making dinner and that is it for the weekend!!

    And yes…somehow it is STILL snowing here! The weather is mild so I am not minding the extra exercise the shoveling is providing…since I did have to cancel my gym membership a couple months back, this is a fair substitute :)

  41. Baby Girl says:

    Hello everyone!

  42. Jade says:

    Virgin Sugar – At work would be the best place for you to find an arrangement in fact and you will be able to see from that how generous he is. Pay close attention to those who tips $ 100 bills and buy you outfits / flowers / gifts.

  43. Virgin Sugar says:

    Shoogar- I just reread a earlier post,
    OC- she can have my email. Is that how this works? OC is the blog goddess? :)

  44. Virgin Sugar says:

    I’m a dancer.

  45. Lily says:

    Do you tend bar or waitress?

  46. Virgin Sugar says:

    Grr, I can’t seem to see new comments in between my posts!
    Shoogar- I was saying Yay because Midwest emailed me, not at the idea of meeting potSD IRL! lol I work in a bar, so I only meet guys who want to date a stripper, but only cuz they have no money, or who are just looking for an escort, which I am so not! I don’t even think I’d want guys at work to know I’m looking for an arrangement!

  47. Lily says:

    Shoo is absolutely right. Take what works for you (from everyone else’s perspective) and meld it into your own approach and M.O. that feels genuine and right, for YOU.

  48. Lily says:

    I’m 7 hrs ahead of you. Write me after work and I’ll respond when I wake up, and when *you* wake up tomorrow, there will be some thoughtful tips.

  49. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Virgin – Just remember to take the advice you receive here (and elsewhere) and apply your own rules/boundaries/beliefs. As you delve into this pursuit more, you will see some of the lessons will be through trial and error. Eventually, as you find “your way”, you will see that you might even be offering advice to ‘virgins’ based on your experience. You are going to do just fine! Best of luck to you and enjoy your afternoon/evening at work.

  50. Virgin Sugar says:

    You ladies all give good advice. My computer is slow about reloading so sometimes I’m out of wack on the conversation.
    Midwest- yes, I am attempting to pay my bills, I just haven’t been doing a good enough job lately!
    Shoes- Good advice! I wish I could read your blog but I understand your precautions for your safety with psychos & haters trying to scare you/ ruin your life. People suck. Why does someone always want to ruin someone’s fun!
    Lily- Darn! When else are you free? What’s the time difference? I’m on eastern time.

  51. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Virgin -ha ha. I’m sure you are saying that in jest. Midwest hit my sentiments exactly. Most SDs want you to be working! :)

  52. Virgin Sugar says:

    Midwest- Yay! I’m excited!

  53. Lily says:

    Aw, darn it, VS and I are on conflicting schedules.

  54. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Yes, you are right Midwest. I can see where discussing the time-line of allowance payouts could seem quite transactional to some. However, I am referring to after you have agreed and plan to move forward with the arrangement. To me, once you have reached that point of putting everything out on the table of expectations/needs and you have determined there is chemistry and you are ready to move forward with something definitive, then the specifics of allowance (along with anything else) can be discussed very openly. This is my opinion and works for me. Of course, I am a very open and expressive person once I am comfortable with someone.

  55. Midwest says:

    VS – SDs like a lady who is at least attempting to pay her own bills. Besides, as your sugar sense gets sharper, you may start to recognize IRL sugar daddies :-)

  56. Lily says:

    I hope VS is still listening…. I now have several hours free if you can hit me up via email. Click my name, get to my blog, and click on my full profile and choose to send an email to me.

    Oh, and the “privacy/safety” article there on my blog (most recent) has some of my thoughts and opinions on how to approach arrangement discussions.

  57. Virgin Sugar says:

    Ugh, I gotta go get ready to go to my lame job. Alas, won’t a SD come sweep me off my feet so I don’t have to go? I could almost justify skipping work to stay home to work on my profile & search…

  58. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Taz – Your (over) productivity today give you a great excuse to chill later on. That’s my excuse. I’m exhausted from a crazy week. I’m just blaming it on the rain. (a la Milli Vanilli)

  59. Beach_ Girl in LA!!! says:

    hello sugars!

    The rain here has somewhat stopped lets hope it stays that way! 😀
    hope everyone has a great weekend..

  60. Midwest says:

    VS- You have mail!

    TLG – May the force be with you. Enjoy the IV cocktail and stop messing around! You have some sugar to seek!

    ES & VS – I have to somewhat disagree with you about the money/timely approach. It is definitely something you have to be comfortable with discussing, but many that I have met dislike the transactional nature of it. I always opt for the open-ended questions…What works for you? etc. James and I did get to details, but he was a gentleman and brought it up. It’s a tough dance, but you should walk away feeling comfortable that all expectations are clear.

    As for the intimacy – this is also a fine balance. No lady wants to feel like a carrot is being dangled over her head and no man wants to feel like she’s only after his money. I think a gentleman would be willing to ease a lady’s angst of sleeping with someone without worrying about being taken advantage of. At the same time, a lady should show a genuine interest. If you are not interested, don’t pretend you are just to get the goodies.

  61. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    Haha – and now I am off to be productive again!

  62. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    I have actually been uber productive – yay me! You can take a break Shoo – I have done enough for both of us :)

  63. Shoogar Shoes says:

    I have a million things to do today…but ah, the rain is making me lazy.

  64. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Love your initials, by the way! What woman doesn’t love VS? Good choice.

  65. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Virgin – of course, it depends on what you and your pot SD are most comfortable with. I have had conversations with some that lasted for weeks on email and some wanted phone time right away. So it is a combination of their comfort level mixed with yours. If a pot wants your number right away and tells you to call him and you are not comfortable with that approach just yet, tell him so. If he is a gentleman, he will respect that. There isn’t really a perfect formula for everyone to follow. It really depends a lot on individual preferences and comfort levels.

  66. Virgin Sugar says:

    Ok, so next question, when do you have the initial discussion of each others’ expectations? Do you do that during the emails/calls/texts of getting to know each other, or do you wait until the first date & discuss it over dinner?
    Haha, I was looking at the posts from after I went to sleep last nite, & I hadn’t even realized my screen name abbreviates to VS when I had picked it, VS- Victoria’s Secret, how perfect! lol

  67. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Virgin – sorry for all the notes, just read your question again and not sure I’m answering properly. In a normal and healthy arrangement (especially with an experienced SD), it is perfectly common to discuss details and expectations of the arrangement before ever moving forward. You should definitely hold out on intimacy until expectations (on both sides) have been discussed. I wrote an article about healthy arrangements ,but my blog is currently disabled. If you would like, give OC permission to share your email address and I will send it to you.

  68. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Virgin – The way I suggested above is a non-threatening way to broach the topic without bringing up anything about intimacy, but also opens the door for discussions of intimacy and other expectations.

  69. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Virgin – Ah, sorry. Just caught up and now I know what you are referring to. A good way to ask eloquently is basically something like,

    “I know we discussed $x as an allowance, but would you mind telling me how it will be easiest for you? And when is it convenient for you to begin? I’m sorry to ask, but I just need to plan my budget and wanted to know if it would be distributed on the 1st and 15th of each month or how…?”

    Something like that above. Of course, this is assuming you two have established the specifics of the arrangement already and have an open line of communication that makes you comfortable bringing it up.

  70. Virgin Sugar says:

    Yes. Making the arrangement official. Like I saw on one guy’s profile that he won’t start the allowance until the girl starts the intimacy. So it just got me to thinking how is that matter handled properly, & what would be some of the ways that it could go it could be handled bad. I guess I wanna know what’s normal & what’s not, a potential disaster! lol

  71. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Virgin – when you say ‘seal the deal’ are you referring to the allowance?

  72. Virgin Sugar says:

    Hello Sugars!
    Matrriarch- Hello! Where bouts are you? How do we share emails with each other without posting them for the whole world to see?
    Alice & Jade- I was wondering the same thing. Jade, I assume at the same time as you ‘seal the deal,’ but how do you handle it like a lady & not a ‘lady of th evening’ lol, as my mom calls it!
    Lily- I’m close enough to Tennessee that I could be worth the trip for him. Probably only a 3 hr flight. I would love to learn from your experiences & get some advice. I really want to be serious about finding the right SD.

  73. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Flo – Shoes might just be the most perfect thing in life. No? Shoes, and our ability to accept imperfections, of course.

    Taz – “Sugar sisters flowing together” sounds like great lyrics for a song. Think, “We are family…” Love you, dear.

    Lily – Congrats on the Bengal cats. Things always come together, don’t they? If at first we don’t succeed, try a new approach. Good for you! Keep us updated on your name choices for your new babies.

    TLG – Best wishes for a full recovery. Wow. Seems you’ve you’ve been fueled with enough napalm to make it through. Hopefully that along with the entertainment of this blog will make things easier for you.

  74. AnnaMadrid says:

    Ok everyone, off to work:( be back later!

  75. The Lone Gunman says:

    Thanks TT!

    They sent me home hooked up to enough devices to qualify me for honorary Borg status.

    Resistance is Futile. I WILL assimilate the intravenous materials.

    They will service…..ME.


  76. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    Oh and I am definitely a dog person too….*only* b/c I am allergic to cats though..had one for five years and it was pure hell for me but still couldn’t get rid of him lol…

  77. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    Hi TLG! Nice to see you again! I hope you are done with surgery for a little while now…will be happy to see you more!

  78. The Lone Gunman says:

    (Cue Star Wars opening fanfare)

    A long time ago, an SD far, far away…

    Hi gang!

    I’ve dropped by for a moment; have undergone emergency surgery to help rectify a complication from my earlier woes. Back from hospital now.

    I’m going to be okay. The healing process has begun anew, and a full recovery is anticipated in about two months.

    Hope to post more regularly as I get better.

    Looking over the blog, I must admit that you have all been busy!!

    Best wishes all around.


  79. Jade says:

    sugarbarbie – I do not use numbing cream at all. All I notice is the skin gets red like a sunburn. I think the videos they use the stamps that are medical grade ” bigger needles ” Do not get the roller!! I feel it scrapes across the skin and that takes for more healing time.

  80. AnnaMadrid says:

    Alice- Greetings:) You’ve been in this relationship for a month, he should’ve started giving you allowance a month ago.. Unless you didn’t really agree on that.

    Matrriarch-thanks for the advice.

    Morning/afternoon all!

  81. Gail says:

    SSSD!!!!!! We have missed you!!!! I am so doing a happy dance!!! It’s our one year anniversary!!!! Wow a year ago today : ) Hugs and Kisses!!!!

  82. sugarbarbie says:

    Well I’m logging out. TTYL

  83. sugarbarbie says:

    Thanks, I like him so much that a couple pot that seemed to poof contacted me this morning and I totally ignored them. I might be setting myself up for heart break but I really think he is worth it.

    I haven’t had cats since I was really young. I am more of a dog person I think. problem is I usually get big dogs. Next time I will get a tiny dog. Don’t know what kind yet.

  84. Lily says:

    Sugarbarbie, good luck with Sugar McDreamPot.

  85. Lily says:

    I always had cats, growing up. I’ve waited a decade now to have them in my home as an adult!! It will be so sweet. I truly Wish I could get domestic cats but bff is allergic to cats except for bengals.

  86. sugarbarbie says:

    Hello you all!

    I was reading through and am really interested in that derma stamp…googled it but haven’t figured out how to get one yet. Watched a video and not sure if I want to do it myself…yikes. How numbing is the numbing cream lol. Blood is why I dropped out of pre med. :)

    On pins and needles ball is in POT court so you know how that goes.

    Getting a late start because didn’t back from my event until almost 4 this morning. feeling kinda yuck. I have another event tonight.

    Craving some almond milk right now I don’t know why.

    Lily, awesome with your cats I wish I could have a pet.

  87. Flo Rida says:

    Shoogar – there’s no such thing as a perfect SD only perfect shoes.

    Taz – hi! waving furiously like a complete bitch wave

    Lily – you may be a lady but I can be a complete bitch when I want to be.

    So sports royalty has bought himself a sports franchise. I would love to be a sports agent but athletes only want men in that role.

    Going to bed again, tired! Ciao peeps

  88. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    Lily – very happy for you! I hope that they bring you a lot of joy :)

  89. Lily says:

    I have agreed to go in 50/50% on the Bengals, with BHSD, by the way. Tuesday. I’m counting the hours to kitty-time….

  90. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    Shoo – ya – no shit! I will be happy when this is all put to rest for you. I like it when the sugar sisters are all flowing together – no drama…from what I know about you – you are a very kind and giving person…and along the path of enlightenment – those are the ones that are tested the most. Just means you are close(r) :)

    Ok – back to regularly scheduled blogging 😛

  91. Lily says:

    It’s now pitch black dark in la la land, aka the arctic circle. But continuous good mornings to the west coasters!!

    OC, I wondered what you meant about colorful language but then I saw the phrase you removed from my long post today. I totally get why. Thems were no words a lady should have in her vocabulary. And I am a lady…albeit kind of a minx.

  92. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Aw, you’re sweet, Taz. Just taking a momentary pause while dealing with my recent personal issue with the “stalker”. I think the PIs are close to cracking the case though. More letters are surfacing. The more people who receive it, the narrower the guilty person’s identity is becoming. This person had no idea the wonderful and healthy relationships I maintain with all who come and go in my life. Also, the investigative team is hands down, top notch! Nice to have connections, that’s for sure.

    I am hoping to make my blog live again soon. That decision will be made after all of the madness is solved and everything cools off.

  93. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    OC – Yes this is so true – however learning the lesson can be sugary in itself – only depends on your perspective of course 😉

    Shoo – love the new identity!! Have missed playing catch up and not seeing you post as often :( I am not sure where I found the time to keep completely up with the blog before lol…certainly can’t find it now 😛

  94. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Sounds like a fabulous night, OC! rain, rain…go away.

    ~Waving at Taz!!~

  95. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    Happy Weekend sugar fam :)

    OC – so glad to hear everything is so sugary :)

    • OCSugarBaby says:

      Oh my gosh!
      Hi TT, yes it is sugary but let’s be realistic…
      Life gives you daily lessons. Some days
      you need to add a bit of sugar to the mix to
      make it all that much sweeter…
      I have missed you my sugar sister.

      Now I am really signing off. Later Peeps and Chicks

  96. ESB says:

    I LOVE PEEPS!! OMG, they make them for every holiday now.. ghosts, christmas trees, turkeys… but I have to admit.. if we have them around all the time, they become common, not that yearly treat. I love my little yellow chicks. They are the BEST!!

    Now, we gotta mention jelly beans here too. Jolly Rancher and Starburts… YUMM!!

  97. photogirl says:

    ESB – No kidding… I know exactly what you mean. I understand now why people always told me boys were easier to raise. Never understood it until a couple years ago.

  98. Shoogar Shoes says:

    photogirl – it was OC’s Peeps that brought us all back together. As you know, we are ALL suckers for sugar!!

    • OCSugarBaby says:

      Peeps the candy of choice by Sugars around the world…

      • OCSugarBaby says:

        Ok, a peek into tonights Date…
        Confirmed Limo
        for a lovely sunset drive up PCH
        Confirmed Dinner Reso
        at a Beach side Romantic Spot
        Confirmed oh shoot, can’t share that!

        I am very excited for my date tonight,
        feeling very warm and fuzzy. Planning
        tonights festivities was fun! But it is raining
        like crazy, that puts a kink into wanting to wear
        my new Manolo’s!!! Oh Crap.

      • OCSugarBaby says:

        ESB I had over 20 interviews (I called it the good bad and the ugly) before I landed my current position. For several positions I was down to the final few and was so frustrated with not getting to be the final pick. But during it all I would have a good and healthy pissed off rant and long walk on the beach and get it out and MOVE on to the next set of interviews! Someone has a bigger plan for you. It just takes a bit of getting out of your own way to allow it to happen. Which it will!
        Kind of like sugar searching!
        Between the Peeps and the stupid girl scout cookies, the month of March will be a double up time on my work-outs! But oh so worth it :)

  99. ESB says:

    Thanks Shoogar. (Yes, I know who you are 😉 ) I’ll wait til Mon. or Tues when traffic is slower on here, don’t want to be pending on the weekend. Esp. if I’m sending out emails.

    Photo: Very true. Nice to see can be civilized and respectful. I often just keep my mouth shut rather than add drama to the blog. I have 3 daughters, I have enough drama in my life with out adding to it in another area.

    FYI: the reason boys are easier to raise than girls… they slove their probelms themselves, while girls drag everyone around them into their world of woe.. then they get over it in 5 sec. while we (mom’s) are stil tryingn to fix it for them!! Yea, much more drama with girls!!

  100. photogirl says:

    Good morning everyone…

    Glad to see everyone is playing nice and still able to express their differences of opinion.

    SSSD – Welcome back :)

  101. Shoogar Shoes says:

    ESB – Sorry about the news on the job. Just means there’s a better one out there for you. I think it’s been said by many of the SDs here, they are fine with profiles that shave off a few years as long as the SB is honest early on after meeting (and looks the age). Happy sugar hunting!

  102. ESB says:

    Been cathing up for an hour. Imissed alot of fun last night. Some new/oldl bloggers returning to add their wisdom. That was a nice treat.

    I’m feeling a bit depressed this morning. Got a letter from one of my interviews last night. Was so sure I had that job, but they gave it to someone else. CRAP!! There is still one other one, but after some deep thought, it may not be so prime. To much driving, less time with BG, but it will be a steady income. I so need that right now.

    Had 2 old guy friends contact me in the last 24 hours. Was so nice to hear from them. Made me feel not quite so old and done with life. I’m serioulsy thinking bout changing my age on my profile. I don’t like to lie, but honestly, anyone who knows me does NOT believe I am my age. I look much younger. Maybe just take 5 years off? It may help.

    Well, going to go do a search and start writing some SDs to try to get some bites.

  103. Lily says:

    Shoo knows that I know. Mwahahaha me so clever.

  104. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Morning, Lils! I guess we’re the only ones here?

    To answer SSSD’s question about security: I do think SB’s are probably a little more careful now and aren’t linking to their profiles (since this is a public blog) than they were a year ago due to the growth of SA.

    My security issue that you read above, has nothing to do with this blog at all. Seems to be a personal vendetta with someone trying to ruin my professional reputation – for whatever reason.

  105. Lily says:

    Morning (sunset over here, soon)…!!

    I could never replace or compare to Sugar & the City in terms of help & advice, I will reiterate that I have a lot of ‘down time’ the next six days and am happy to brainstorm sugar searching techniques with any struggling or newbie sugars out there who would like a sounding board.

    Southern Older Gent (described on my blog) has been skyping me daily & expressing his insecurities & frustrations for weeks now, and I’ve even really been able to help this potSD (never had an SB, yet) open up his thinking and ask himself the right questions in order to formulate the right plan for attracting the right lady to enhance his life. Previously only escorts and scam artists were trying to get into his wallet and not seeing the sweet man associated with his cash, and I’ve helped convince him that not all SBs are like that (except for those pure-bred-kitty-lusting!!! 😉 ).

    Again, anyone relatively close to Tennessee!? He’s a darling man with a somewhat modest budget for sugar, but just enough to make it sweet all around. I’ll whisper your profile number into his ear if you like; he trusts my judgment if I say I think a gal is genuine about this.

    If any other gents want to talk with me about how to try to attract a lady of true substance, or any ladies want to gab with me about their hunt for a feller, let me know. We can quickly move to IM on skype, and even a video call, to get things expressed much more clearly/quickly.

    If no one needs my help or wants to gab, that’s cool…. and what I’ve suspected all along anyways!! 😉 but this next week is pretty slow & the rest of March looks busy, so ask now if you’re gonna!!

    Morning all!!

    • OCSugarBaby says:

      Haha Good Morning Lily!
      You sure know how to wake someone up
      with your prose. If I could suggest one thing,
      maybe to keep the colorful wording turned
      down a notch or two. You keep me laughing!
      My offer is always open to brainstorm with
      any Sugar that needs advice. My sugar
      knowledge is pretty decent. But my
      Sugar Shoes are resting comfortably
      in the closet for now.

  106. Shoogar Shoes says:

    -Oh, and didn’t mean “who I am” IRL. I meant just here on the blog. (name change…)

  107. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Good morning, OC. I am having my coffee, catching up on email as well as the blog and craving Peeps. You are right…I should change my name to Shoogar Shoes. I’m starting to feel like P Diddy with all the name changes.

    (Have you guys figured out who I am?)

    • OCSugarBaby says:

      Good Morning Shoogar! We go to
      bed last night and the blog explodes
      with fun posts and people. Not to
      mention a lovely mix of SD’s and

  108. Shoogar Shoes says:

    MM – Ha ha. I actually didn’t think it was a typo. I have come across some profiles of SD’s seeking “friends” for their SBs.

  109. Matrriarch Midwest says:

    Oopsy…funny typo. *provide their sbs with new experiences* not new sbs :-)

    • OCSugarBaby says:

      SSSD… nice to see you again my old friend :)
      Yes, I am still around. Glad you are too! ~OC

      • OCSugarBaby says:

        Good Morning Sugar Family!
        Ahhh it is so nice to wake up
        and know that all is calm and
        well… Now for my coffee, few
        hours in the office and a lovely
        evening with my handsome
        man. Enjoy your day!

  110. Matrriarch Midwest says:

    “What do sds like to do” ? Sorry, don’t recall who asked. Truth is, you have to ask. Pay attention during conversations..make notes if you need to. Many SDs like to make arrangements to provide their sb with new sbs. Others are so busy that they prefer the sb take the initiative to make arrangements. Some just need some time in, others always want to go out. Bottom line…ask sweetly. He will be glad you did.

  111. Matrriarch Midwest says:

    SSSD- Great post earlier. Welcome back! I loved the WSJ article and the tales of the Vegas meet. You have made friends for life.

  112. Jade says:

    aliceinsugarland- the allowance should start right away or else speak up for yourself . Men are not mind readers.

  113. Matrriarch Midwest says:

    Virgin Sugar – Niki and I are close to your area. We have both had SDs. She is currently in an arrangement and I am great friends w former SD. I will be happy to share what I know. Niki comes and goes, but she may reach out to you as well.

    Also, I have had success in contacting sds. Just have a thick skin…meaning don’t stress out if they don’t return your e-mail, don’t stalk his profile to see when he logged in or if he read your e-mail. Some will, some won’t …so move on.

    OC, could you please share my e-mail with Virgin?

    AnnaMadrid – There are a lot of little things you can do to a) relieve stress and b) not add any additional stress. To relieve stress, (and if he is not married) send his favorite cd, guilty pleasure, or a cute thong to his hotel/ work/ home. Just be discreet, you don’t want him opening a thong in front of employees. You can leave a sexy text or voicemail recalling some fav night you had together. Send him an IOU for one of his favorite activities, etc. You can refrain from adding additional stress by not letting him feel guilty that he has not seen you. If the allowance is still coming, you KNOW he has not forgotten about you. Keep that sugar flowing and know he will be so excited to see you when his schedule does free up.

  114. Lily says:

    pot SD = potential sugar daddy

    and to answer your other question: it varies wildly.

  115. Annamadrid we are almost in the same boat but I’m 19 and I go to a boring community college too but I live in LA but that doesn’t make it any better I just recently started a SB/SD relationship but I have been seeing him for about a month and he is wasting time on an arrangement he says he’s looking for longterm to and wants me to get tested I have no problem with that but I don’t see why he shouldn’t start the allowance now how long does it usually take between meeting your SD and him starting your allowance?
    by the way what is a pot SD?

  116. Lily says:

    Lil’SB is in the house!!!!!!!!!!! Woot!!!!!!!!

  117. lil'SB says:

    Oh oh oh, also exciting is this: USA, WE’LL BE SEEING YOU ON THE ICE ON SUNDAY! IT’S ON (again…)!!!! (<– Olympic hockey reference if you find yourself confused).

    I'm starting to think watching a live sports game (hockey, soccer, basketball) will probably also make a great SD/SB game. What else is there that an SD might like to do? Attend an art gallery? See a car show? Visit a micro brewery? Wine tasting? Would just a movie be too simple…I'm guessing shopping isn't really their first choice in exciting things to do…but of course everyone is different. Hmmm.

  118. lil'SB says:

    Err, I guess I should start looking into investments to tackle those student loans then…

    SSSD – you can link your profile by pasting the link onto the ‘website’ text entry box right under “Mail (will not be published)(required)” when you’re leaving a reply and your name will show up as a link.

    Lily – You have the most subtle way of hinting at an euro meet. Let me follow suite and learn from your wonderful example to insert my own shameless plug 😀

    Oh yes, I wonder where cleo is also….Cleo, I sent you mail but I’m not sure if you’re getting them D: reply soon!

  119. Lily says:

    I’m staying awake. It’s lunchtime here. Sleep tight, sugars.

    When you east coasters wake up in a few hours, shout out a hello to me!

  120. LASB says:

    Hi Anna! Soooo not ignoring you. :)

    Ok, I’ve said waaaaaay too much. Lack of filter late at night is typically a sign that I’m tired. I want to stay up and keep watching snowboarding, but I guess I should get some beauty sleep.

    G’nite sugars!

  121. LASB says:

    Oh Lily, you are too funny! Looks like all this talk about dinero has you wound up! haha. But really, doesn’t TX have a way of arousing that kinky sadistic side? I just want to tie him up and tease the heck out of him. (And you!) haha.

  122. AnnaMadrid says:

    Damn it I’m still here!
    Good night Lily!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  123. LASB says:

    TX – 4x a month is fine, provided that it comes with a generous allowance. 😉 Then I can invest more and you can teach me about the Philippines.
    Sweet dreams!

  124. Lily says:

    TexaSD & LASB, sitting in a tree………k – i – s – s – i – n – g …………….

    Good night AnnaMadrid!!!!!!

  125. LASB says:

    TX – I hear ya on the bubble, but we will come out of the burst, the same way we did from the 90s. The thing is, people will always want to live in CA. Everything is here – industry, good weather, etc. I’m not opposed to diversifying outside of here, and in fact I have other holdings unrelated to real estate. But I understand the RE game in LA, so it makes it easier to keep doing what I know. But you are right and I AM looking at a lot of different things.

  126. Lily says:

    I’m not bored! I’m always loving on you……….swoon! :) I just fantasize about you in kinky scenarios even more than TexaSD.

    SSSD- I gotta go re-read the article!

    AM – hola!!!!!!

  127. TexaSD says:

    LASB- YA I feel you.. Its getting late… Well then I will pass out my asian rose… Goodluck Goodnight, And lets do the vegas thing probably 4 times a month lol…. ahh good times… talk to you later

  128. LASB says:

    Wow SSSD, I know you just went to sleep, but in case you read this at some point I just read that article. You are a hardcore stats man! I love it! Analytical minds… Mmm!

  129. AnnaMadrid says:

    Good night everyone!

  130. TexaSD says:

    LASB- Well, you figure that was a bubble, and its not going to happen again, unless we go back into recession (god forbid). I am doing way better now, and to think, I was 90k in debt from student loans…. to where I am now, LA is not the place I would put my money (not yet at least) Texas has been pretty good, I am considering Thailand now, (philippines has been great) Asia/Brazil is where its at. And the fact that TX doesn’t have income tax. I dunno, I am not sure about California anymore. 340k for 4800 a month is not so bad…

  131. LASB says:

    Here, but not for long. Esp, now that we’ve bored the heck out of everyone else. lol.

  132. AnnaMadrid says:

    Texas- Yeah, I think I might do that.

  133. TexaSD says:

    Anna- Well, we could just log out and go to bed, try again tomorrow

    LASB- your still in here right?

  134. LASB says:

    TX – Hmm… you are convincing me more and more. How did you decide to invest there in the first place?
    Well, $2400/month for a $170k house is not bad, but I wouldn’t rent to students. I would do the less risk/hassles $1400 which gives LA a better ratio. Plus, our long term appreciation (especially if you buy in a market low, which I did) is pretty awesome. eg. Your Glendale flip.

  135. AnnaMadrid says:

    Texas- hmm we can fix tht problem;)

  136. TexaSD says:

    Anna- Lol I know how you feel… no ones on my YM either lol…

  137. AnnaMadrid says:

    Texas- Thank goodness for that! I’ll never be able to sleep now, it’s after 4! no ones on my yahoo, or msn lol.

  138. TexaSD says:

    Anna- I am still here…

  139. LASB says:

    SSSD – I don’t know if I want to go down that road. I’m extremely smitten already, and I only met him in the first place because he told me he was single. He is super careful about not letting his wife find out, but I don’t like the idea that she could and since I don’t know the full situation, it makes it dicey for me. I mean, it would be so much better if he had just said, “Yeah, I’m here because she doesn’t put out.” Ugh.

  140. TexaSD says:

    LASB- Management in the philippines LOL… ya its like 200 a month for like 10 properties…. Depends, if you rent to students or a family… More money with students, less risk with a family 2400(Students) 1400(family) – property taxes and insurance of course…

  141. AnnaMadrid says:

    SSSD-Good night

  142. AnnaMadrid says:

    SSSD- But We’re not done not flirting:(

  143. SSSD says:

    Good night, all. Time for me to sign off.

  144. LASB says:

    TX – Yeah, I invest by the philosophy of buy where/what you know. PH would be tough for me without a management team. Way more hassle than I want. So what would a 170k house rent for in TX?

  145. SSSD says:

    LASB, if so, you’ll probably have a good time with him as an SD. Not forever, but hopefully enough time to make it worthwhile?

    As long as he’s generous it should work out, depending of course on the arrangement you seek.

    The downside is I bet it will make his wife very upset since it’s an emotional investment and not just a physical one.

  146. AnnaMadrid says:

    SSSD-Flirting? What Flirting?

  147. TexaSD says:

    Anna- Lol…

    LASB- Well glad you came back

  148. AnnaMadrid says:


  149. AnnaMadrid says:

    Or you both can come over to my end before you go.. That we all have equal time together:)

  150. TexaSD says:

    LASB- Lol Sweet… ok, how good are you at massage (The real and fun kind lol)

  151. SSSD says:

    All this flirting and no access to profiles! What’s SA for anyhow? 😉

  152. LASB says:

    SSSD – I think it might be #1. I believe he is addicted to falling in love. I’m pretty sure it’s not that he needs a variety of sexual partners, but there’s the emotional component that he’s really into. He said he wants to have long dinners with his SB so that he can really lose himself in the conversation. I’m open to hearing any other opinions.

  153. TexaSD says:

    Anna- Now your talking…

    LASB- That is not the best example, 50k is for philippine property in Manila… TX homes are about 170k new… I was smart when I lived in LA, I used to live in Glendale and then when I sold my house, I bought a house in S. Pas for about 310, sold it for 590, Came here for a new job, bought a house, and property abroad, and 1 extra here and have been doing not bad since.

  154. SSSD says:

    TexaSD — I’m there 5 & 6th. In NYC on 7th.

  155. LASB says:

    TX – Vegas it is! I was temporarily unable to access the SA blog, so not trying to leave you hangin’. Not sure why, but I found a way back in. :)

  156. AnnaMadrid says:

    Or I can just hang with SSSD;) Who’s game? lol

  157. SSSD says:

    Doesn’t seem like such a great deal for me, though. 😉

  158. TexaSD says:

    SSSD- Ya I might try that too, I heard they put a S$70 entrance fee… I think they are focusing more on Foreigners then say day trips from Johor or something… I will be there ~13-18th ish…

  159. LASB says:

    Lily – Thanks for the heads up. I’m back. :)

    TX – Ok, that’s not a bad rents/expenses ratio! So then what is your projected appreciation? I still love LA though, and the property I’m moving was actually purchased pre-bust and it’s still worth a lot more than what I paid. Oh, and if/when I buy in NYC, it will be more of a second home than a rental. Come visit! :)

  160. AnnaMadrid says:

    Texas-I got it! I can go with SSSD since he’s only there for two days, meet up with you, then back w SSD, then back to Georgia/Florida or Northeast:)

  161. SSSD says:

    On the plus side, Anna, I’m often in NYC. Probably there right after Singapore, as a matter of fact. 😉

  162. TexaSD says:

    LASB- Did you pass out? You aren’t helping the yellow fever…. sending me into withdraw now… lol

  163. SSSD says:

    TexaSD, I may be in Singapore in less than a week, but only two days. I’m going to check out the new casino. I don’t gamble but just want to see how well they put it together.

  164. AnnaMadrid says:

    Texas- :(

  165. TexaSD says:

    Anna- your kiling me smalls…. I have Singapore in a Few weeks… lol… oh well… you know its weird Cleo not being online right about now…. Cleo come out of the shadows…

  166. SSSD says:

    Thanks, Lily.

    Regarding the article, SSSD = Sam Spayed SD.

  167. AnnaMadrid says:

    Hey Lily

  168. SSSD says:

    BTW how do you link your SA profile to your blog posts? I know there is a trick to getting the URL to work.

  169. TexaSD says:

    Lily- I wanna Say El Paso or Maybe Las Cruces NM is halfway, but ehh Las Vegas is close enough for me lol…

    LASB- You know, we should, I mean, to keep Lily happy… Who wants her depressed? lol…

  170. AnnaMadrid says:

    Texas-Northeast:( But I’ll be in Georgia/Florida in a couple of weeks to vistit family.. so that’s a little closer lol.

  171. Lily says:

    SSSD the article you were featured in was very interesting. I’m desperately trying to guess which SD you were…….

  172. Lily says:

    I want to go to Rwanda and Uganda to scout the remaining gorillas before they are all extinct!!! My dream vacation…… sigh……..

    TexaSD & LASB – get a room. In Vegas (halfway point?)!

  173. SSSD says:

    I think OC dates back to my time on the blog.

    Well, I’m off also. I’ll see what transpires tomorrow.

  174. Lily says:

    SSSD- I also loved your description of an SB’s ideal role.

    Flo – You, too.

    LASB, yes the site is working, why is it down for you?!

  175. TexaSD says:

    Anna- you anywhere near TX lol?

  176. AnnaMadrid says:

    Texas- Less excited and more more jealous… Take me with you! I’m small enough to fit in the trunk of a car;)

  177. TexaSD says:

    LASB- Does OC still post on here? I haven’t heard anything from her in a long time, I remember her IRL bf got into some bad accident a few months back… never heard how it turned out

  178. TexaSD says:

    Anna- I need a real vacation now lol… I think when these contracts end I will take a few months off and actually do that…

  179. AnnaMadrid says:

    Texas- super super excited now;)

  180. TexaSD says:

    Anna- You know, I have never been to Africa, but SA (South Africa) would be kinda cool…One of these days, I will do that lol

  181. SSSD says:

    I’ve known people in open marriages and mostly they don’t work over the long haul. But one could say that about marriages in general…

    Marriage today is very different from it’s roots, which were more economic and social in nature. Expectations and distractions are both high, which results in a lot of disappointments.

  182. AnnaMadrid says:

    Texas- I’m there with you on that one. Maybe It’s just my age, but what is the point of an open marriage?

  183. TexaSD says:

    VIrgin- Ditto (sorry my last comment didn’t get posted)

  184. AnnaMadrid says:

    Gnight VS

  185. SSSD says:

    Goodnight VS!

  186. TexaSD says:

    Goodnight Virgin

  187. TexaSD says:

    SSSD-I am one of those that never understood an Open Marriage, thats like lets just be friends that sleep together, but date other people lol… (too me at least)

  188. Virgin Sugar says:

    Good nite sugarland!

  189. AnnaMadrid says:

    Texas- I always wanted to go to Russia.. Particularly because I have a Russian first name. Cuba would be nice to visit. I never really thought about Thailand, Malaysia or Lithuania.. A little interested in Chile. Still, I’d like to see them all.. Sometimes places change your outlook on things. I’m getting super excited just thinking about travelling!

  190. TexaSD says:

    LASB- Well you gotta figure in insurance and property taxes and misc… but less to manage? ehh, Strength in Diversity, TX markets didn’t lose value, CA, NV, NY FL CO did… 1 of the problems in the recession is that people put all their eggs in a single basket instead of spreading risk… But hopefully whatever you choose, you will do great. (800 is for a single property that cost me 50k)

  191. Virgin Sugar says:

    Ok, sugarland, a girl has gotta get her beauty rest if she’s gonna find the perfect SD!
    Texas- I hope to talk to you more & get to know you.

  192. SSSD says:

    LASB, could be several reasons:

    1. SD is a hopeless philanderer.
    2. SD has a dark soul.
    3. Wife is a hopeless “philanderer” or has a dark soul.
    4. Marriage of convenience or a forced situation.
    5. Open marriage.

    I guess you should be hoping it’s the latter three.

  193. Virgin Sugar says:

    But I would love to talk to you more. I may be willing to take a road trip :)

  194. LASB says:

    TX – Actually I thought about Miami. I also like San Diego, but haven’t gotten down there to shop yet. They crashed first and their prices are quite low.

    I get that you think investing in these places is not good, but I’m not buying your average place. I wait and wait and wait til I get the needle in the haystack and then I negotiate the hell out of it. It works. Anyhow I’m sure we are boring the heck out of the lurkers and others. If you ever want to talk shop, get my email from OC or whoever else has it.

  195. Virgin Sugar says:

    Texas- Not close but not far, either! I’m 26, college student, aspiring fashion designer & pin up model

  196. LASB says:

    I see your point, but I’d rather have less to manage. I understand it’s riskier, but the rewards are so great. My places cash flow, despite the high mortgages, and for much more than $800.

    Oh wow, it keeps getting worse. Now they are registering the quake at 8.8. This is not good. :(

  197. TexaSD says:

    LASB- Atlanta is another great place… if you don’t like Texas, Miami properties are coming down in prices too…(no TX or GA though lol)

  198. TexaSD says:

    Anna- All pretty good places, Haven’t been to Russia since after graduation, but, I thought it was interesting… You should always consider the developing world as a great place to visit, Cuba (Havana, Santiago) Colombia (Cartagena) Chile (Santiago) Lithuania (VIlnius). Thailand (Bangkok Phuket) Malaysia (KL, Johor) Those are all great places to go…

  199. TexaSD says:

    Virgin– ohhhh, maybe….. hmm, near how far to Chicago? I want to say I might go there this year…. I need to double check on that, But that might be doable… Tell me about yourself (just for fun lol)

  200. TexaSD says:

    LASB- lol all poor places to invest in :(. I understand your desire to invest in areas you go to. However I don’t go to the Philippines that much, and I do pretty good there lol… its all about making your money go as far as it can go, and lets face it, money doesn’t go far in those cities… 300k will go a lot farther in TX than in those places, and at the end of the day, not having a house payment is pretty good. and then another 800 in rent money is sweet lol. I will always hand out free advice…

  201. LASB says:

    SSSD – So I have a hypothetical. If a guy is happily married and in a pretty new marriage, why would he still want an SB?

  202. AnnaMadrid says:

    Texas- I want to go everywhere! I love Europe and would love to see more countries there. If I had to pick three other countries it would be France, Italia and Russia.. Not exactly in that order.. I’d love to see as many countries as possible.

  203. LASB says:

    I love driving, but only when I don’t need to be anywhere any time soon.

    SSSD – I like your description on what an SB can do to relieve stress. I’m planning my date with my pot SD and I on Sunday. I told him that I want him to not have to think about anything. (Well, anything other than my sexy, well-organized self. hehe)

  204. Virgin Sugar says:

    TexaSD – Indianapolis. Wanna visit me?

  205. LASB says:

    TX – Yeah, I learned the insurance thing the hard way. It wasn’t that I was cheap, it was that I got the wrong kind. Never again! And yes, the lessons learned from that debacle are SO worth it.

    Probably won’t buy in TX. I only buy in places that I like to frequent. Learned that one from my business partner who bought in the boonies of Illinois and now has to fly there way too much. haha. That pretty much limits me to NYC, Denver, SF, and LA. LA is the easiest right now and the rents here are amazing.

  206. AnnaMadrid says:

    Texas- I don’t know if I could drive for more than an hour:)

  207. TexaSD says:

    Anna- It was pretty good, She lived about 1 hour away, Single mom, cute, nice, fun to be with, like dating… just she wasn’t broke at the end of the day lol…

  208. TexaSD says:

    Anna- Where are you wanting to go?? besides Spain lol

  209. AnnaMadrid says:

    Texas- That’s great! So, I’m guessing you have had a sb in the past? How did that go?

  210. TexaSD says:

    SSSD- Yes sir…

    Anna- Yes I love traveling, I just hate the actual flying part lol… Driving is pretty cool, as longs as its under 5 hours

  211. SSSD says:

    Effectively taking away the stress of an SD seems a bit of a lost art among SBs, I fear. It is difficult. It involves knowing how to receive generosity without being pandering or obsequious. It means knowing how and when to ask and how and when to just do it. It is being warm and caring or sexy and daring. It is such a complex mixture it is no wonder if is difficult to find.

    It certainly is not just “fooling around.”

  212. TexaSD says:

    Virgin- Well where you at lol…..

  213. TexaSD says:

    LASB- Yes, that is a lesson from my Dad that I will never forget (NEVER EVER GO CHEAP ON INSURANCE)… Well at least you set out a goal for yourself, owning property is a great step, if you are going to sell, consider relocation to a cheaper state and re-invest (ie TEXAS lol) You be surprised how far you can go if you are smart and take chances… So if you might be getting a SD (i still haven’t found your profile :( lol)

    Anna- Yes sadly… However I will re dedicate myself to correcting that problem shortly lol.

  214. Virgin Sugar says:

    Texa- I’m available! 😉 lol But unable to travel to you at the moment so probably too far. :(

  215. SSSD says:

    LASB, the lessons learned are what make the mistakes worthwhile. 😉

    Your wisdom is ahead of most persons just based on your last post…

    TexaSD, is an SM a female SD?

  216. AnnaMadrid says:

    I wish I could get rid of my sd’s tension and stress.. He hasn’t had much time.. looking forward to spring/summer though because he did promise he’d have more free time then. I really can’t wait to travel!

  217. LASB says:

    TX – Hahaha. Well, that’s the hope! I have a certain financial goal in mind, but I’m still pretty far from it. I’m learning that you need great insurance and a lot of padding for unforeseen disasters. Oh, the lessons I’ve learned…

  218. SSSD says:

    Thought I’d take a stab at being topically relevant:

    >When do you find time for sugar?

    Alas, all too infrequently. Sugar is like a vacation, it may never be a first priority, but it is an important part of life.

    >How does the sugar melt with the rest of your life?

    It really depends on the confection. Some mix quite well, thank you. Others form a mess that is hard to clean.

    >Has a sugar daddy or sugar baby taken some of your stress away lately?

    Not to be brusque, but what is the value of an SB (or an SD!) if they aren’t some form of stress relief?

  219. AnnaMadrid says:

    Texas- I meant SB, lol oops.. So you don’t have a sd, Sm, or sb, got it lol.

  220. TexaSD says:

    Anna– I am a SD lol…. But I would not be opposed to a SM lol… But a real good SB would be sweet, I have so much tension and stress, that i need to get rid of lol

  221. TexaSD says:

    LASB- Well there ya go, we should have you to SM status by 2013….

  222. AnnaMadrid says:

    Texas-I take it you don’t have a sd? Taxes, selling property, I feel soooo young right now:)

  223. TexaSD says:

    LASB- Research work, my boss is a slave driver… nothing social lately… not even a movie, and I usually see a movie at least twice a month… except this month… hopefully next week, I should be above water finally…

  224. LASB says:

    TX – I’m not doing my own either. Waaaay too complicated. But I have to gather up all the forms, papers, etc, etc. I used to do them, and I have a few errors I need the tax guy to fix. It’s been non stop digging through papers.
    I AM buying more. Just shifting things from an area that didn’t lose any value, to an area that’s deeply discounted. :)

  225. TexaSD says:

    Anna- Ditto on the waiting part lol… Well that sounds cool, I am pretty much like that, I prefer just 1 at a time…

    LASB- Haha Taxes, dude I gave up on doing my own long time ago, it just gets tricky with double taxation treaties and dual citizenships and working different contracts, Selling property? Seriously, you should be buying more lol… Best time right now, if you want some tips, think international 😉 (Not Europe)

    Virgin- I like it when they contact me (unless they are pros…) and ya sometimes too busy, or don’t know how to break the eIce if you can call it that lol…

  226. SSSD says:

    Do people generally keep their blog identities and SA profiles separate? Is there a reason?

    I saw earlier in the thread some reference to security incidents. Has that been a problem recently?

    I joined SA in late 2008 and “left” in early 2009 almost exactly a year ago. At that time it was smaller. I was profiled in a New York Times article about the site. Apparently it became a lot more popular after that article.

  227. LASB says:

    OMG! 8.3 Quake in Chile! That’s waaaay bigger than Haiti’s even. The plates are shifting. I wonder who’s next. :(

  228. LASB says:

    What about you, TX? Watcha been up to?

  229. AnnaMadrid says:

    Texas-I’m probably gonna wait it out a little. He did tell me he was only interested in one sb relationship at a time.. He wants a long-term thing. I feel the same. Waiting sucks though. Hope it’s worth it.

  230. LASB says:

    I’ve been working on taxes, sorting out the loft, trying to sell a property, detoxing, etc. Fun stuff. haha. I’m pretty close to entering SD relationship, but of course I know that nothing is certain in life or in sugar.

  231. Virgin Sugar says:

    & some SDs are probably too busy to search multiple profiles, right, I’m guessing

  232. TexaSD says:

    LASB- Lol, oh I like you…. So what has been up with you lately?

  233. LASB says:

    I’m pretty new. I joined the blog towards the end of ’09.

  234. TexaSD says:

    SSSD- I not sue how long I been on, at least 6 months or more… I dunno, sometimes arguments chase them off, sometimes they find what they are looking for, sometimes they lose interest, and for others we just get busy lol…

    Anna-Sweet lol… How is it going so far? Well its up to you to keep looking, (as long as he knows/doesn’t care)

  235. SSSD says:

    And even after a year they haven’t improved the interface for chatting and messages. 😉

  236. SSSD says:

    Hi LASB. I haven’t been on the blog for a year or so. How about you?

  237. LASB says:

    Well hello my yellow fever blog friend! :)

  238. TexaSD says:

    LASB- My asian rose, whats up?

  239. SSSD says:

    TexaSD, have you been on the blog long, for a year or more? A lot of people here seem to be relatively new to SA. I wonder what happens to the old hands… have they found success? or the opposite and get discouraged?

  240. AnnaMadrid says:

    Wow you’re young too:) I’m here because I recently started up my “first” sd relationship! I thought it would be interesting to read/reply on this blog about sd/sb experiences. I really want this sd thing to work out. I wasn’t sure if I should keep looking or not. I’ve only been on two dates w this guy (who’s married so that explains some of it)… What are you here for?

  241. Virgin Sugar says:

    Flo- Yea, that’s a good point. I know guys do like being approached in real life, so I guess it makes sense that they also like being approached in sugarland!

  242. LASB says:

    Hi late night crowd and Lils!!

    Still lurking.

    SSSD – I don’t recognize you. Have you been here before?

  243. SSSD says:

    Yes, many SD receive many contacts. I delisted myself to control the flow. I believe this torrent of contacts is part of the popularity of SA to SDs. But it can also encourage “bad” behavior.

    But in general I do believe it is useful for an SB to make the first move. Like men in usual circumstances, you just have to get used to some level of rudeness and rejection.

  244. TexaSD says:

    SSSD- Ya, home early (lame I know) busy all day today, and just don’t have the energy to stay out any later, so just laying in bed reading… now we just need a few more night owls to show up, and we can get some gossip going or something lol…

  245. TexaSD says:

    Anna- lol Ok cool. 20 year old, Ok your the youngest on the blog I have talked to so far (don’t worry not much older than you, probably 7 years) So what brings you to here?

  246. SSSD says:

    Looks like only the late night crowd is left…

  247. AnnaMadrid says:

    I’m not in Madrid..I’ve actually only been there once. On a trip my sophomore yr in highschool.. Spent 9 days there, loved it, fell in love actually.. I’m 20, live in a boring town, go to a community college in a nearby boring city..

  248. TexaSD says:

    Anna- Are you in Madrid? So tell me about yourself (obviously you don’t have to be to personal lol)

  249. AnnaMadrid says:

    Texas-I guess it’s the same here.. Other than me being tired and not being able to sleep!

  250. TexaSD says:

    Anna- Its going alright at the moment, how about you?

  251. AnnaMadrid says:

    Nite Flo

  252. Flo Rida says:

    Virginsurgar – if you are in demand you can wait for SDs to contact you, if not hedge your bets and contact some yourself. You’ll have to put up with some ‘no responses’ and also some rejection but if you don’t ask you don’t get PS remember to make first contact unique and mention something about them so that you paid attention (though it does take time).

    Lily – you have a good heart.

    Nite all!

  253. AnnaMadrid says:


  254. AnnaMadrid says:

    Hey Texas! never actuallu conversed w u.. How’s it going?

  255. TexaSD says:

    Same here lol

  256. AnnaMadrid says:

    still up…

  257. Lily says:

    Virginsugar, I contact *them*.

    Most recent logins.

    If you have any other questions, ask!!

  258. AnnaMadrid says:

    Hey LASB!! So glad someones here.. so lonely:( sucks to be up at this time..

  259. LASB says:

    Hi FL-SD and AnnaMadrid! I’m here. Getting work done and lurking.

  260. AnnaMadrid says:

    Hey guys! I’m back.. It feels like I never have time to blog at all! I’m free now and I feel like everyones asleep:( Come back you guys! fill me in since I really have no idea what’s going on now.. Guess I should scroll up and read some posts??

  261. FL-SD says:

    Eegads! I’m a relative newbie and an SD and I’m not put-off by the comments here at all! I don’t always agree… I always learn, though. The good things and the less than good… This blog is so valuable ! But rather than judge, perhaps take a step back and find a lesson in the stories, the advice, the successes and the disasters.

    It’s a cross-section of real life. So there will be huge differences in what expectations are. Huge variances in income levels on both sides. I carry away the lesson that it’s whatever works for a person or a couple…. Nobody’s right or wrong. It’s an arrangement, it evolved through negotiation, and everybody agreed to whatever it was up front… So who am I to judge. It’s whatever works for that couple at that stage in their lives.
    As a new poster and a relatively new SD, I am grateful for this forum and the inputs of those who have been here longer. They provide a valuable function in passing along knowledge, experience and advice. We all benefit from that framework.
    Okay, first rant…. Thanks. U

  262. ESB says:

    Thank you Shoogar!! Sugar sweet dreams to everyone!!

  263. ESB says:

    Night OC, I am right behind you. Going to hit the sack. Helping a friend move tomorrow, unlike Lisa, there will be no moving van or men, just us freinds who love and care for her.. and our aching muscles. We are hitting the club at the end of the day though, so going to add insult to injury by getting drunk and celebrating her new found freedom. So glad I do not have BG this weekend. I plan on being hung over come Sun. morning… but not to much. I have a feeling I’ll be the designated driver AGAIN!!

    Night VA, HUGS to you!!

    Catch ya all tomorrow… sometime!

  264. Virgin Sugar says:

    Do you think it’s better to seek out pot SDs or just relax & wait for them to contact you 1st? I would imagine all the really good SDs get a ton of messages from hopefuls!

  265. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Hi Beach_girl, Taz and VA!

    ~~sending ESB virtual sugar dust and all that is sugary~~

  266. ESB says:


    My job gets in the way of my blogging. NOw that sucks. Seriously, glad I missed the drama.

    Sinsere SD: I lived your life for a VERY long time. Stayed in a bad marriage for the kids. Now that I am free, I see my son VERY little. I am torn about wether I think it was still a good idea or not. I have gone this far, can’t go back now. My kids are my life. When we are together, the moments are precious. We do little things, dinner out, sit in the lobby at school to chat while waiting for Dad to pick him up, (I am there to p/u BG) and some times it is so hard. I admire you for staying. I know it takes as much strength to stay as it does to leave. I hope no one judges you for your decision. You have to do what is right for you, and I understand how hard that decision can be from day to day.

    Everyone else… tomorrow is a new day. Lets all move forward, leave the drama behind, and get back to enjoying the sugar life… um.. can some one send some my way?? :)

    • OCSugar Peep Bunny says:

      Hi ESB and VA SB! I didn’t want to run off and not say HI.

      No drama here. Just us PEEPS hanging out :)
      Be well and see you all soon…

  267. VA SB says:

    Okay, wow….just glanced a bit and things got very sticky for a while….going to go back and try to fully understand what happened…..

    By the way, hi everyone!!!


  268. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    Speaking of books..I just placed an outrageous order on amazon lol (live in a small town – not much for books) – I do believe Anatomy of the Spirit was one of them :) …if not I wanted it but had to cut it off somewhere…next shipment 😛

    BG – so nice to see you my love!!

    OC – nice to see you back on the blog and hear that you and bf are well :)

    Oh and I *used* to LOVE chocolate – was my weakness..and ever since I was pregnant – I can hardly stomach it now…but OMG do I miss it!!

  269. Beach_ Girl in LA!!! says:

    LASB~ Show was ok, was nice to see my friends though… so many people to see still… not enough time lol….

    OC ~ I mailed you back!

    i am off sugars… have a great night

    • OCSugar Peep Bunny says:

      Shooger Shoes you need to change your name to Shooger Sugar or Candy Girl :)
      I am so glad you guys came out to play with me tonight! Thank You
      My Sugar will be here in 15 minutes so I need to sign off and get rid of my
      Carmel Cone Haagen-Dazs breath!!!
      Nite Everyone, you PEEPS are the best! ~OC

  270. LASB says:

    Shoogar – you really ARE into the sugar!!! Candy corn, yikes!!! I think I ate one too many as a kid. I used to love all those things, as well as starburst and skittles and hard candies. Then one day, I stopped liking all of it. Now if only I could hit the chocolate kill switch. Oh, I love my dark chocolate!

  271. TexasSugah says:

    Lisa – Moving? What did I miss.. and to Memorial??? I am dying to know what happened here. That is great! I am sooo happy for you. I hope my pot SD comes through for me. Girl, did you get a car too????? OOOOooo we have to talk I hate it that I was off line. This is better than the Real House wives!!!!!

    Hey Gail, yeah right. I’m really in a feast right now. I’m chatting with a few guys. The usual BF stuff in the background but I need someone to step up to the plate. Ol’Boy in Georgia was a pouf daddy. LOL

    Thanks for the well wishes. How was your V-Day trip? I treated myself since I didn’t have anyone. Now.. I’m pretty hot to trot.. LOL

  272. Shoogar Shoes says:

    OC – Oh, I cannot eat just ONE Peep. Ever. I make myself sick on them. Every holiday, in fact, has an evil that I just cannot resist! Halloween, it’s candy corn. Christmas, it’s cordial cherries. Valentine’s Day, it’s conversation hearts (which you had me staring at for weeks) and Easter, it’s Peeps.

  273. Shoogar Shoes says:

    LASB – Thank you so much for that recommendation. Seeing how I practically live in book stores, I will check that one out tomorrow. I have been on the path to enlightenment for many years now. And I agree with you on Tolle’s appeared numbness. I do believe in the core foundations though of “stopping the thinker” and understanding our pain bodies. Any other recommended readings on spirituality and living more peacefully, bring it on! That, and ice cream, of course.

    Virgin Sugar – Welcome. As OC stated, there are many great bloggers here who can answer your questions and offer guidance in your sugar quest.

  274. LASB says:

    SS/OC – I really like Carolyn Myss’s Anatomy of the Spirit. The discussion is all about energy, but she puts it into concepts you can relate to, such as how she drove through the worst part of Chicago during a riot and didn’t get attacked, why you shouldn’t be pissed off at your parents still, or why it probably benefited you to have grown up as an outcast. It’s pretty cool stuff.

    • OCSugar Peep Bunny says:

      LASB! I love new reading suggestions. Thanks! I will pick that one up.
      I am sooo digging my new blog picture. Easter is almost here! Peeps rock!

  275. LASB says:

    Hey Beach!
    How was the show? Was it rock or something else? Sorry to have ditched out. I’ve had one heck of a week. In a way, my yesterday was not so different that a certain other blogger’s yesterday, other than that it appears I am very difficult to find, even to threaten. haha. This person, who is supposedly looking for me, will have to go through great lengths to do so, and even when he finds me, I’m not all that worried that our differences can’t be resolved. But work has been crazy lately. Way too many meetings even for me, and I like meetings.

  276. LASB says:

    OC – Jade recommended this device for scars called the Derma Stamp. Check it out on google.

    SS – I did read a bunch of Eckhart Tolle’s stuff but wasn’t that into it. I did like his discussion on the pain body, which helped me understand where anger comes from and where it’s fueled. Mostly though, I can’t relate to his mechanical thinking. Although I’ve never met him, he comes off as being sort of numb. He’s ok, but there are other authors that I vibe with more.

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      Beach! I will sent it to you right now :)

      LASB, I will have to check it out. Love to learn new things!

      Virgin Sugar! There are many wonderful people on the blog who will answer your questions. Can’t really tell you how to be a good Sugar, but guidance is the best direction we can offer. I am in California. Chicago Sugars pop in the blog from time to time. Ask away!

  277. Beach_ Girl in LA!!! says:

    Hey everyone!
    not sure what happened here… well just saying hi…
    Welcome new bloggers

    OC ~ shoot me an email… i’m only here for a few more days! 😀

    LASB~ hi girl, how are you?

  278. Virgin Sugar says:

    I need some Indy or Chicago sugar friends! Well, I need sugar friends in any area. Anyone want to mentor a new sugar? Help me with my profile?

  279. Shoogar Shoes says:

    LASB – You have the greatest attitude ever. I’m curious, have you read Eckhart Tolle’s “The Power of Now” at any point in your life? I (try to) live and breathe by the core foundations within the lesson of his book.

    Yes, welcome back OC! Pass the ice cream! The more sugar, the merrier!!

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      Thanks Shoogar Shoes! I better pass it quick before I power to the bottom of the pint.
      I never thought I could go over two weeks without posting. Hmmm nice to know I have the power to
      control my addiction.

      Cleo! Thanks fo the shout out. My sugar is wonderful, thanks for asking!
      He is a good, good man and a wonderful role model. I am secretly working on a formula to
      clone him!

  280. Lisa 2 sds, 2 x-lovers, 2 apartments says:

    Going to bed now. Goodnight

  281. LASB says:

    So the negativity doesn’t really affect me. I’d prefer it not be here, but at the end of the day, it has had no effect on my real life, my mood, as I will just keep on keeping on.

    Jade, you made a good point. I agree that when you judge others, you are defining yourself more than the entity that you are judging. By the way, I have to put the stamper away. Sitting on my counter, it was just taunting me! I marked on my calendar when it’s safe again for it to come out and play. hehe.

    I would like to share something I heard today. There are two ways to be the tallest building. One is to knock down all the other tall buildings. The other is to work on building your own. Although I’m not trying to be the tallest building, I prefer to work on my own flaws than those of others. Also, I’d rather look for ways (IRL and on the blog) to be enlightened and amused than for ways to be offended and angry. It’s a smoother lifestyle.

    Anyhow, I still think that the blog is a great place to find answers and will probably keep posting/lurking. It’s helped me a lot! (Ok, really I’m just addicted. hahahaha) Also, I don’t think the blog is like uncorked champagne. I think it’s ever changing so it will have highs and lows.

    Hi OC! Welcome back!

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      LASB Sugar Girl! Thanks, I have been traveling for work so I have been MIA.
      Yes, totally agree with you on the point most comments just have no
      real bearing on my life, mood or my ability to see the sugar among the
      flakes. I must admit that my mood lately is GREAT!
      What’s the Stamper?

  282. Lisa 2 sds, 2 x-lovers, 2 apartments says:

    Hi Gail :) I had this strange sense that you were lurking, lol

    Moving truck will be here monday morning. Never had a moving company before or real moving boxes, lol Most of my moves have been throw it in the back of someone’s truck, lol But I don’t know anyone with a truck so darn, gotta use the pros. I hope the boxes aren’t too heavy.

  283. Gail says:

    LOL @ Lisa…..Yaaaaaaay!!!!! When is the moving truck coming to move you? I am so excited!!!!!

    Yaaaaay Texas Sugah!!!!! I am doing Happy Dances for you two!!!!

    Lisa and Texas Sugah I am sending the both of you big smiles!!!
    See….there really is sugar out there : )

  284. Lisa 2 sds, 2 x-lovers, 2 apartments says:

    Channeling Gail, Gail are you out there

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      Looks like I have missed a lot too! I will go radio silent while reading and trying to catch up. Kinda hard to do with the “orgasmic” pint of Haagen-Dazs – Carmel Cone flavor in my hot little hands!
      I come out to play and it is quiet. Come Play with me!!!! I will share some of my ice-cream…
      I need a new blog pic… off to find one

  285. Lisa 2 sds, 2 x-lovers, 2 apartments says:

    Houston looks like a hotbed for sds right now and I’m finally moving from the hood to the Memorial area on monday :)

  286. TexasSugah says:

    WOW.. I’ve missed ALOT..

    Hey all.. This blog has been really something else. I can’t believe what I read from Elegant. WTF! That is some sad mess, why would someone even care what she’s doing? *shakes head*

    Besides this blog, I’ve got to get some reading done on the others that are linked to this blog. TONS of great info out there.

    It’s good to hear that a few people have struck sugar…

    Soooo remember when there was the whole discussion about Houston sucking, and I chimed right in. Well I have a new pot SD. We met on another site and were just kinda texting back in forth. During the convo I told him that I wanted a sugardaddy, not a traditional BF. He’s divorced so no biggie. He was VERY excited.

    So, we danced around the whole how much time do I have to see him and what I would like a month. Now I’m lost. I thought I had it all figured out… ahhhhhh no. We kinda decided on every other weekend because we both have kiddos. I have to figure in a babysitter, my ex is SORRY!

    So we’re going out next week and….I did a search on him and he’s who he said he is. I’m kinda nervous. Who knows…

    Buyers remorse – Now why can’t I find that post 200+ later. I ended the communication with my first Pot SD. He stayed online and was acting very possessive but hadnt done a THING for me.

    Thank ya’ll for telling me not to give up.. really. Let’s see how it goes..


  287. Flo Rida says:

    Virgin Sugar – NYCSB has a blog up (i think) so does Lily – though i’ve never read either – if you go there as a first resort that would be helpful, if you need further more specific advice please shout – we can help. I don’t know the Indie or indeed any regional area though. Good luck in your search.

    • OCSugarbaby says:

      ESTROGEN POWER… haha
      However many SD’s post, past, present or future it is always
      a lovely injection of… Ahhh the pheremones of a
      TRUE gentleman SD it is such a Sugar HIGH!!!


  288. Flo Rida says:

    JamesNY and NYCSB – please get a room in real life and end the suspense. Sorry couldn’t resist :-)

  289. Virgin Sugar says:

    Hey Sugarland!
    I jus put up my profile this week. I figured if I really want to be serious sbout finding a SD I should make some friends & mentors. So I want advice sbout how to handle dicussing my needs, first dates, ‘making it official’, all that good stuff! I’m in Indianapolis which isn’t a very big city. So I’m guessing my experiences will be different from the NY or LA scene. Are there any SB/SD/SMs here near me? What can I expect?

  290. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    I don’t find anything that was said to clutter up the blog at all – I guess everyone has their opinion.

    Lisa’s SD – I just read your post and I am not sure what happened concerning you but I want to express my sorrow that anything like that occurred…

    Funny the ‘old timers’ are getting knocked but isn’t always the vets ppl go to for advice??

    Mandy – I do believe some of these wonderful ladies helped YOU as well.

  291. CA Dreamin SB says:

    Me too!

  292. Matrriarch Midwest says:

    Signing off…goodnight.

    Friends- I can be reached by e-mail. My patience has been lost here.

  293. Mandy says:

    Can you all talk to each via email please instead of clutter the forum? K, thanks!

  294. East Coast Filly says:

    Wait for me….I’m an old leftover too :)

  295. Matrriarch Midwest says:

    James, NYC and AM…can I come too?

  296. Jade says:

    “To hate and despise others is a sign of weakness and selfishness. To hate someone takes all your good energy and prevents you from realizing your dreams. It is easy to hate but it is greater to ignore because a fool don’t know that he’s a fool, and thinks of himself as a great and important person. A fool believes he knows everything, and yet the wise man knows nothing, and is always in pursuit of knowledge and understanding. This is the difference between a fool and a wise man. “Don’t ever become somebody’s fool, be forever wise.”

    There is no such thing as perfection. the only perfection one might say is real,
    is to be open and accepting of others.
    I feel our society is so quick to knock someone elses happiness, blessings and success and that is an ugly truth to behold.
    It blows my mind that some people spend hours, days, months and even years out of their lives speaking about other people, ones they don’t even know.
    Maybe I’m a snob but I am a lot more concerned about fixing my own life than belittling someone elses.
    At the end of the day when you squeeze a lemon you don’t get apple juice…
    it might seem like a no brainer but think about it for a minute…
    people that are happy and secure in themselves exude that…you can’t squeeze a happy person, and have mean juice come out.
    So my point is, next time someone puts you down, calls you ugly, fat, good for nothing, or anything hurtful…just know it says so much more about them than it does about you.
    If you squeeze an ugly person, ugly juice comes out and they are just projecting that on you…but no matter what they may say about you, it’s not going to make them any prettier, smarter, thinner, more likable, none of those things…
    it just makes them an ugly person inside. I can bet you any amount of money when they lay their head down at night, they are filled with thoughts of torment and bitterness, in the end,
    the ugly thoughts they have inside, will make them ugly on the outside!….
    and that my friends…is how people become truly ugly!

    You bring about, what you think about?

  297. JamesNY says:

    Anytime, NYC SB and AM — just doesn’t feel very playful here anymore! Ciao belli

  298. Anna/Molly says:

    Coming out of lurk mode to say HI JAMES! :)

    Oh yes, come and play!

  299. NYC SB says:

    JamesNY – AM and I are waiting for you in our play room (sorry couldnt resist)

  300. JamesNY says:

    You can’t reheat a souffle. You can’t recork champagne. Guess the same idea applies to a blog.

    Every political blog eventually turns into a liberal/conservative name calling fest. Every sports blog eventually turns into a “[your team] sucks” fest. All it takes is one or two determined, hostile people to ruin the whole thing. Loses the fizz, the fun, the feeling of connection.

    Joining AM and NYC SB on hiatus. Hang in there everybody, good luck in sugarland. All I’ll say is, I’ve been through a lot of s*** and I have no illusions and yet I’m still a believer and optimist. You get the world you wish for and deserve.

  301. sugarbarbie says:

    :) Thank you I hope so too!

  302. Matrriarch Midwest says:

    Sugarbarbie – Woo Hoo! Congrats on McDreamy SD…hopefully it will all come together!

  303. sugarbarbie says:

    Matriarch I did finally got a full length up and it made a huge difference. Fortunately, I may be removing my profile for I think I found the one…for real this time. We’ll see once we meet in person…but I think he’s dreamy:)

  304. Flo Rida says:

    VanMs – valid points, seems like the sugar world has some truly awful people (including me) and some truly wonderful people. I have spent time in the dark side of the force and to make up for my sins I try to help (some) people. Maybe we have looked into the depths of a woman’s soul and some do not like what they see. BUT if we looked deeply into the soul of some men we also would not like what we see. I have no problem with honesty or free speech.

    Lastly couldn’t resist but are you a long time blogger in disguise :-)

  305. NYC SB says:

    VanMs – Venomous comments… some on point others not so much… but you are entitled to your opinion. Of course you decided to take a stab at the “regulars” who “juggle.”

    Feeling part of this audience here is what I have to say… Yes I post a lot… I enjoy it… yes I have 2 SDs… I am unsure how posting during the day precludes me from having an SD… both of them work during the day… so clearly while I post I am not with them… If you take note I rarely post at night (except the last few nights bc of sucky weather) or over the weekend… those are times I reserve for SDs and friends and family

    So with that I will be signing off blog for a bit… I tried to offer advice as best as I could… I will continue to do so on my blog and I am available over email

  306. Matrriarch Midwest says:

    NYC SB – I can’t breathe b/c I am laughing so hard!!! “That whore from NYC” and you did the walk of shame…You so rock!

    Sugarbarbie – Guys get a lot of women who say they have pics, but never deliver. They also get terribly disappointed when women show up 50lbs heavier, 5” shorter and 20 years older than their pics. Sooooo…get that full length shot…go to the department store dressing room and use a camera phone. It won’t be perfect, but it will be a good representative of who you are so they don’t let their imaginations run towards the negative.

    Nicole, Northeastern SB, nubiansugar, Alice, VM – Welcome!

    Lisa – Congrats! Looks like you may have found a new career in subletting as well

    Sincere – Very nice to see you again! I’m so glad sugar is sweet for you! Great advice on removing profiles. That’s how I dealt with sd4m…it was impossible to try and delete my profile, so I just removed all the info.

    Cleo asks “How does a sugar date differ from a first date?” I don’t behave any differently on either. The nice thing is it’s a nice restaurant and I don’t have to go dutch.

    ECF – Hi stranger! I don’t find d/d free too offensive. Truthfully, this is where the thick skin comes in. I have heard so many stories of people who willingly have relationships with people who are infected, so I would think it rules out those people.

    Boston Honey – james and I are glad to see you back! Your website recommendation was heeded a few months back!

  307. cleo says:

    OCSUGARBABY are you okay? how’s the man? i’m a bit worried babe it’s been a WHILE since i saw you here?

  308. Lisa 2 sds, 2 x-lovers, 2 apartments says:

    Hi Midwest :) :)

    Now back to my packing just packed 2 large boxes of shoes

  309. Lily says:

    Midwest, you’re right. I was adding another redundant ‘justification,’ when in fact it isn’t necessary. It’s not like I ever said, “God I just grit my teeth and smile when I’m with these bozos, –after all, anything for the almighty dollar!!!” or “These fools think I’m only with them but in reality I’m juggling 11 sugar daddies and getting rich quick!!!” and now I’m trying to retrace my steps and make it sound like I do actually *like* these guys and I do appreciate them, and blah blah blah. I’ve been honest all along, and I stand by every word I’ve typed in February. They were misinterpreted by many, but out there IRL, I have hurt no one and certainly USED no one. The relationships (all TWO of them) continue and flourish.

    Anyway, moving right along……

    What do you do when you adore your SD, but he has a little quirk that makes you want to groan? For me, it’s sleazy, Homer-Simpson-Style humor. He thinks he’s being so funny by dropping these into conversation, and I smile with tolerance and say something to the effect of, “Well that was a very silly little joke, now wasn’t it?” in a deliberatly condescending way. Every time. Now he beats me to the punch and while happily guffawing, says, “I know! I just can’t help myself! I think they’re funny, and I know you hate it!!” and just cracks himself up and I just exhale and laugh at the situation. Our humor doesn’t gel, and we both know it, and we just live with it. But sometimes I just want to smack him and say, “5 joke free minutes, ok???” because I do so love our serious conversations when he’s not dropping some truly cheesey or ridiculous crack here or there which kind of throws me off. I have said to him that I enjoy his company despite his humor, and more than once. He knows it explicitly. Yet does nothing to decrease the frequency of the Beavis & Buthead type of slapstick humor even though I don’t pretend to like it, although I do make sure I don’t act bitchy about it, but react like a tolerant & affectionate parent with an overly silly child. I wonder if it’s just my problem and I need to get over it.

    It’s not really an issue when it’s once or twice a week, but when we spend every afternoon together, it wears on my nerves. Perhaps it’s just a frequency thing. I have very few friends, IRL, that I could hang with everyday and not get a little worn out with it, too, so it’s just natural….?

  310. East Coast Filly says:

    Hey Midwest…just waving hi !!!

  311. Matrriarch Midwest says:

    Happy Friday sugars!

    Elegant – I trust you are using every precaution. So sorry for how this has affected you.

    All – Flo Rida and OC have often advised against sharing too much information on the blogs. I know at times, I have done the same. Let’s not give them too much grief about it the next time those warnings appear. This is a collaborative effort to provide great advice and share the goal of great sugar experiences. Ifhis is redundant, I have a lot of catching up to do. Still, it can’t be said enough.

    When do you find time for sugar?
    I make time. I have a schedule that allows for sugar time. If I find we are not able to put schedules together, I will attempt to get a babysitter or meet in the middle. Flexibility on the sbs part is very important.

    How does the sugar melt with the rest of your life? Sugar has enhanced my life and reduced a lot of stress. I was able to replace my car, pay down bills and relax a bit all while enjoying some pampering and wonderful company!

    Has a sugar daddy or sugar baby taken some of your stress away lately? Care to share? Former sd has become a wonderful friend and a great addition to my world. Had a pot date where we enjoyed fine food and great conversations.

    I have to share that pot date went absolutely above and beyond to come to see me and I am truly grateful. He had to cover family obligations, drive through blinding snow, catch flights, endure flight cancellations, endure longer hotel stays and rearrange family obligations. All the while, he kept a light attitude about everything, was entertaining, generous and a total gentleman.

    I can now fully understand the complications winter can bring to LDAs.
    I learned quite a bit about how expectations can be different and need to be clarified when an sd/ sb is travelling. A good conversation came up about how sbs can strike a balance between travelling and safety, plus increase the odds of their search while travelling, but perhaps that will be another topic.

    I will share that I am saddened. So many attacks on sbs and sds alike have completely changed the tone and added tension to a place that I considered an amazing resource and is directly responsible for my success in the sugar world. Seek first to understand is a great motto for OUR blog. We are the stewards here and it is up to us to provide support and sound advice. Let’s cleanse…remove the toxicity and move on…no more justifications…no more rants. If you have a concern, sometimes it’s best to put it out there as a question that we can all learn from.

    Matriarch (Thanks LASB :-) ) Midwest

  312. Lily says:

    When do you find time for sugar?

    When they have time for me. BaldHottie wants to see me nearly every afternoon, but we have agreed once per week. There are usual little favors of offering to give me rides here or there, or take me to lunch, that I don’t have the heart to turn down (like every day this week)….which has us breaking out ‘once per week’ initial plan. However, the sugar would stay sweeter from me if it really were just once per week. He has a personality that wears thin on my nerves if we hang everyday, but once a week is PERFECT. Zazazoom is in another city and can rarely see me. Once per month. So most of the time I’m on my own, hanging with my friends, working on my career.

    How does the sugar melt with the rest of your life?

    It’s a central and fun aspect in my life. Great friendships blossoming there.

    Has a sugar daddy or sugar baby taken some of your stress away lately? Care to share?

    Definitely. Hugely. Suddenly I don’t have to worry about watching my cash reserves disappearing at an alarming rate, they are now stable, and if there’s an unexpected need, I know I have people in my corner to help out. Nice restaurants are the norm, and even lovely travel. What an amazing turn of events this fine February.

  313. Northeastern SB says:

    Black Eyed Peas tonight in Boston. Sigh, wish I was going….

  314. sugarbarbie says:

    Ok I have to go squeeze in a quick workout before I work tonight. I will try to pop back in.

    Hope all is well…. oh this this poem that used to be plastered on the wall in my class way back when I was in elementary school. It was called ALL I REALLY NEED TO KNOW I LEARNED IN KINDERGARTEN” by Robert Fulghum

    I truly feel that many bloggers and lurkers alike should probably read it and reflect before posting on here….I will do the same.

    My .02

    Stay lovely! Time for me to go break a sweat!

  315. sugarbarbie says:

    I had been bugging my friend for copies of the photos since the event. it was the only one that i could easily crop other people out of.

  316. Lily says:

    TT- thanks. I also find myself innocent & hardly the cloak & dagger type, but you’re right…on the surface, specifically during my 4 days traveling with 1 SD & not wanting to tell the other for fear of him being jealous…. That probably is what put people off so much. Hey, less than 2 weeks as a sugar & juggling 2 SDs ….some kinks to be worked out, for sure. I did avoid one SD for 96 hours while I was abroad with the other but is that a huge crime?I genuinely like both and non-exclusivity is built in, so…, the sugar in my triangle is still sweet.

    Besides that, how my attitude has reflected “the dark side” of arrangements is pretty silly. I know that these men & I will most likely be at least friends for a long, long time and I’m not mistreating anyone,& that’s all that matters.

  317. Lily says:

    Yay, sugarbarbie!!

    Hey, those of you who want profile help should ask lil’sb. Her profile is amazing. She comes across as so captivating, intelligent, and saucy…. Just, wow. I wanted to offer her an arrangement on the spot and I’m not even that into women or looking to be a SM! 😉

  318. sugarbarbie says:

    Finally got a full length photo on my profile yea!

  319. Anna/Molly says:

    Sorry for typos. Stupid BB!

    K, really going now 😀

  320. Anna/Molly says:

    I just want to say that I’m not mad at anyone here at all or upset. I just feel like I need a little break from the tensions that seem to have been lingering here on the blog. I’m stepping back for a little while until this dark cloud blows over.

    I understand that this is a place for everyone to come together and talk about their sugar experiences whether it be good or bad. However, this is also a place to come and take a break from the everyday tensions and frustrations that we all have to deal with and have a little fun. Unfortuneately over the last couple of days the fun that everyone used to have has gone and has been replaced with a lot of negativity.
    I’m not saying that everything should be happy, happy all the time because we’re human and we aren’t wired that way, but I miss that aspect of the blog and I would like to see some sunshine for a change.
    We will all have or had our disagreements, me included, with fellow bloggers and it’s the nature of the beast, but there also comes a time where we should just let it go and move on.

    OK, I’m done and not sure I made sense. I’m in a hot bath and drinking beer so there you go.

    TT – I’m not shuting down MSN 😀


  321. East Coast Filly says:

    NYC SB: just saw a movie poster for a new movie Middlemen. There’s a faceless woman with her legs crossed in heels with non other than red soles. It made me think of you :)

  322. sugarbarbie says:

    Catching up on the posts….skipping the drama parts…..hmm ac/dc D/D would have never guessed. Learn something new everyday.

  323. sugarbarbie says:


  324. Jade says:

    Cleo- Are you saying ac/dc means anal ? GTFO !

  325. cleo says:

    ac/dc front/back door

  326. East Coast Filly says:

    LOL @ buck wild. I haven’t heard that expression in years.

  327. Jade says:

    East Coast Filly : D / D Free is what swingers use in a profile to hook up with random strangers . I had a guy ask me if I was AC / DC once and I guess that means go both ways. Many S D’s are also in the swinger lifestyle, as they have so much money they can pretty much go buck wild…..and they do !

  328. East Coast Filly says:

    Things that make you go hmmm… is anyone else put off by the statement, please be D/D free when they read it in a SDs profile? I somehow think that is odd. I mean really who wants to be with someone who has a disease and quite frankly if they had one they wouldn’t tell you anyway. It only leaves me feeling that they are flat out saying they won’t want to use protection. That’s just how I read into it.

    Also, has anyone else found that older men meaning upwards of 55 generally don’t like to use protection? Do you think its because they aren’t used to dating as much and are naive about what they could catch?

    Just for the record..I always have and always will protect myself, which clearly has put some men off, oh well.

  329. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    Hey AM – you better not shut down msn 😛 We can keep in touch there and perhaps hold blog smudgings lol…:)

    Can’t we all just get along??

  330. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    Hi everyone – for the record – I was not judging Lily at all. She is a strong voice for the blog and shows a very one sided view of what sugar means to an SB. It is for some not all and I think she has really handled herself completely eloquently with the proverbial finger being pointed from every direction.

    I happen to find your posts very innocent and heartfelt in all honesty – however on the surface…well let’s just say not all are willing to look much further…or perhaps here on the blog long enough to know beyond the surface…

    Anyhow – i am feeling kind of indifferent towards the blog – *most* of us here (including myself) need to get their egos in check. That’s my 2 cents – take it or leave it.

  331. cleo says:

    lisa’s possibly not former sd in ny: oh wow yuck

    i had a feeling i was surfing the surface of this blog and skipping the undertow and i’m just a little sad to have that confirmed.

    that said, i hope your meetup a couple of days ago was awesome for both of you.

    [also i completely agree re lily. i’m sorry that people think we should pretend everything in sugar land is spun sugar and fairy tales. i come here to learn and i need truth for that]

  332. TXSB says:

    Of course race is an issue in the sugar bowl. It’s an issue in “regular” dating too. Everyone has their preferences. It’s no different than wanting a tall man, or a blonde girl. I’ve seen plenty of profiles where SDs state a prererence for a particular race. Just like LASB, I also would rather read about it on their profile so I don’t waste my time contacting them if I’m not what they’re looking for.

    Hi! Sounds like things are going well with your SD! Very happy for you! :)

    Off to lunch. Have a good afternoon everyone!

  333. Anna/Molly says:

    Ok everybody, I’m going into major lurk mode for a little while. If anyone wants to contact me off the blog they may do so, just ask Stephan and there are several other regular bloggers who have my email. Take care everyone 😀

  334. TXSB says:

    Hi to everyone who’s on right now! :)

    NYGent and Flo Rida:
    I absolutely LOVE reading both of your posts! :)

    It’s wonderful that your have a “bonus 7 pack” thanks to your SB who’s obvioulsy keeping you happy! :) Most stories from SDs on this blog are their negative experiences…so it’s great to have a SD talk about how happy he is with his “chosen one”.

    Hi and welcome! You made some very valid points and I agree with a lot of what you wrote. I hope you decide to stay and post more.

  335. Lisa's Possibly Not Former SD (The one in NY) says:

    VanMs, wow.

    Lily, you were posting the naked truth. Truth is poison to these self regulated/appointed blog leaders (thanks VanMs). They want people only to see the false facade of surface sugar so many in this world offer. Letting anyone see the truth about actions, motivations, thoughts, etc. is anethema.

    Cleo, thanks. It has also involved SBs ferreting out information about me under false pretenses of interest. It now involves sending “information” about me – obviously negative – where no such actual information exists. The only person who had any personal knowledge of me until two days ago is Lisa. Any other “information” is a fabrication.

    The activity occurs in the darkness, behind the scenes. Whispers unheard by anyone with first hand knowledge. Unseen by anyone that might challenge them with personal knowledge.

  336. Anna/Molly says:

    Wasn’t the Cali Meet last night? I would love to hear an update 😀

    Anybody want fill us in? Anybody?

  337. cleo says:

    VanMs: ps – i actually hope you’ll stay and post as well… and i do welcome you to the blog in spite of the fact that it may not seem that way from my reaction to your post.

  338. cleo says:

    anna molly the thing is that my shyness manifests as an abundance of gregariousness. not necessarily bad but i wonder if it can be overpowering. like i’m too bright or something…
    lisa’s possibly former sd in ny: i am really unhappy to hear what is happening with you. i admit that i shared one of my experiences with a pot with another sb who was also speaking with him BUT i tried very hard to be even handed in spite of my own disappointment in his actions toward me.

    to the point that if she forwarded my emails to him i suspect he would say so himself (i would prefer that not happen because i think it would be a massive privacy issue for me but if it did i would stand by my words)

    beyond gentle warnings with cause (like if LISA wanted to warn people off about you – which she clearly does not – fine, hearsay warnings? not so fine) i don’t see how it’s anyone’s business what people get up to but i will admit that i share basically none of my sugar experiences here until i *know* he has poofed… and even then i don’t make the men identifiable. sorry y’all but you never know who is reading.

    but then i’m with the radio arts prof who says ‘always assume every microphone is live and broadcasting to every one you’ve ever met’ – this applies to the internet as well.

    that said, i don’t really get what happened and i’ve read every post.
    VanMs while i cannot disagree with your words i feel compelled to point out that your tone is condescending at worst and superior at best. perhaps you might like to consider the merits of dropping a little nasty pile flaming of dog doo doo on someone’s porch before you ring the doorbell and dash off?

    no? just on the internet then?

    [for the record i really do agree with your SENTIMENTS but wow, wow. how kindly you phrase them]

  339. AnnaMadrid says:

    Elegant-So glad to hear you’re in better spirits!!
    You guys I’m so bored!! I know he(my SD) said the warmer seasons make for better time for us.. but I’m getting restless!! I’ve only had two dates w this guy…. I know, I know, I need to be patient but still…I guess I’ll have to keep thinking about other things.. like school, and work until the spring/summer?

  340. Anna/Molly says:

    LPNFSD – I’m so sorry to hear about all of your trouble. I for one have no clue as to what is going on, but I wish you the best of luck.

  341. cleo says:

    incidentally girls, vivien of holloway is having a huge sale…

  342. Anna/Molly says:

    Sorry for the typos, I’m on my BB 😀

  343. Lisa's Possibly Not Former SD (The one in NY) says:

    I don’t know why the men are not around.

    I do know that what has been done to me directly involves this blog. It involves very prominent and frequent posters here on this blog.

    My opinion is that it would be foolish for any SD to participate in this blog in anything more than the most cursory and surface manner, and even then not a good idea.

  344. Anna/Molly says:

    Cleo – BTW, I don’t consider a a sugar date any different than a regular one. Some of the conversation topics may be a little different, but the same in all other aspects. All in all a sugar date is an opportunity to connect with someone and isn’t that what a traditional date is as well?

    I probably just ststed what someone else said, but oh well.

    VM – Hi and welcome 😀

  345. Jade says:

    You have some good points VM !

  346. CA Dreamin SB says:

    Hi VM! Welcome to the blog! We’re ALWAYS glad when someone comes out of lurk mode. Maybe you’ll stick around and be another voice. :)

  347. Anna/Molly says:

    Forgot to change my name back 😀

  348. Lily says:

    Lily is always herself. On sugar dates, regular dates, with friends. Except with SDs, I discuss financial needs and goals (& desires). I have never before been willing to ask for any help or accept any generosity fro
    anyone in such a material way.

  349. VanMs says:

    Hello ladies!

    Longtime lurker, first-time poster.

    I just wanted to compose a quick note to say that I have followed with interest over the past several weeks the goings on of this rather amusing, albeit pretty banal blog.

    I do find it remarkable that some of you are wondering where the boys are when a good percentage of the posts here are stunning generalizations about SDs and men in general. Moreover some of your pointed and rambling musings are enough to send a potSD running for the hills wondering if the women he’s approaching might be one of you what with your confessions of deciet, skullduggery and cloak and dagger approaches to relationships. Why would any man of intellect and means want to mire himself in that? How tremendously embarassing for us!

    Seems to me that with the exception of a few of the gents that post rather eloquently here from time to time (many of whom would seem to already be with an SB) that everyone else is ultimately treated with scorn and ridicule for supplying what is obviously contrary opinion to the self-regulated leaders of this blog, and is chased away. In the past few days alone this has obviously happened.

    Some said estrogen fest? Indeed!

    I know that I’ll leave now and you will all begin your assault. So I say go for it. Do your level best to contradict one of your own without actually proving the point of my post. It should be rather fun to watch.

    I do hope you all have a very good day. Some of you should really get out a little more often and get some fresh air. Looking at posting times, it seems you spend far too much time behind a computer. One wonders how some of you rambling posters has any time at all for a single SD let alone several.

    *feeling very sorry for the small percentage of decent men on the site*

  350. Naughty Molly says:

    Cleo – I don’t hold anything back. I just be myself and let the cards fall where they may. However, I am somewhat shy so I have a tendency to be quiet when sitting face to face with someone whether it be male or female.I wouldn’t consider being a little shy holding back, but rather a personality trait.

    I see no need in holding back because if you do then the person sitting across from you will not get to know the person you truely are.

  351. cleo says:

    regarding the first date – do you hold more of yourself back? play more of a coquette or really you all are exactly the same?

    SD’s what do you think? is a first sugar date different than a regular one?

  352. Lily says:

    Shoo, your opinion is & always has been welcome. Everyone can express tips/opinions/criticisms to me, and I’ll listen. Unless of course the sentiment isn’t expressed with any maturity, elegance, or tact (i.e. “puke puke”). I’m a big girl who tries to keep her thick skin on & keep her soft heart firmly out of the sugar bowl.

    I never imagined my own experience with sugar, in my very first active month, from out here in this small, remote country, would honestly be of much relevance to anyone. I never logged my journal entries thinking that anyone considered me to be representative of the typical north American sugarbowl ins & outs. I offered it as entertainment value & sugary girl talk.

    But Shoo was right, my audience isn’t a sheltered, sex & the city type of girl-talk clique of ladies, all with similar understanding/framework of things, and equally savvy. I never aimed to promote, advocate, or advise about sweet sugar relationships. I was still in transition from being the post-divorce traditional dater who seemed to only attract leech after leech into my life (and into my bed), and my emotional, mental, and financial resources were becoming quickly depleted and I felt at risk of becoming jaded about men. I was a doormat, but no violins, please, in my platonic social life, I was collecting scores of new and devoted friends into my corner.

    My very recent transition to put the hunt-for-the-love-of-my-life squarely on the back burner and begin sugar dating has been a head-spinningly positive change in my life. Far fewer men in my life, (and in my bed) and the SDs I
    have are becoming, after just 5-6 weeks, very ardent and staunch allies in my corner who are helping my career & thinking of my future, as they float my lifestyle and gift me just to put a smile on my face. It was such a sudden switch, and a bit overwhelming. The transition has been so 180 degrees and so sudden I’m terms of how I’m being romanced and appreciated as a vibrant, joyful, beautiful woman. I love it.

    Have I had prissy, spoiled (rotten) thoughts cross my mind, and blogged with a prima Donna attitude on here sometimes? Guilty. I should have thought about how that reflected on the sugar bowl. I was just getting carried away, and it was tacky. My SDs have never been the wiser, and I didn’t think my musings reflected on anyone else. ZazazoomSD has indeed asked for my wish list and admits he likes me to be demanding, anyways. He’s kind of kinky like that.

    But since my sugar life seems to be pretty stable, and I’m an ENTIRE month in the lifestyle, then why not try to help newbies & frustrated sugars? I’m not convinced I can, but the change in my blog was an attempt to try.

  353. East Coast Filly says:

    Ah, thats what I thought. Thx NYC SB. I love the setup and the design of it but its such a mixed bag. hmmm

  354. NYC SB says:

    EM is supposed to be a sugar dating site… however, majority of men on there are just well off looking to date…

  355. East Coast Filly says:

    Elegant, glad things are looking better!
    I do not see your shoes yet?

    Q for anyone: Is EM a sugar site or regular dating, I can’t quite figure it out?

  356. nycsb #2 says:

    ELEGANT- Wishing you the best :( Sorry this is happening to you!!!

    Ok, I read like half the blog… man, this blog gets addicting and I don’t even post that often!!!

  357. CA Dreamin SB says:

    NOW I see the sexy red shoe!

  358. CA Dreamin SB says:

    No, no red shoes yet :)

  359. cleo says:

    i also still see the old one… i suspect it will change with time and caching

  360. NYC SB says:

    red choos??? hahaha

  361. Shoogar Shoes says:

    Should be red shoos…I mean shoes.

  362. NYC SB says:

    I still see the old one

  363. Anna/Molly says:

    I see your grav! I like 😀

  364. CA Dreamin SB says:

    Shoo – if you mean the black and white character, yes :)

  365. Anna/Molly says:

    The blog has turned into estrogen fest….LOL. We need some MEN!! Helloooo….anybody out there?

  366. Shoogar Shoes says:

    CA Dreamin – Really. Love you ladies, but we need some testosterone up in this b*tch.

    Can you guys see my new gravatar?

  367. CA Dreamin SB says:

    I know AM! They’ve been very absent and I’ve missed them! Not that I don’t absolutely love you gals, but, not the same without those guys!!!

  368. Shoogar Shoes says:


    ( * ) ( * )

    ( 0) ( 0 )

    Come out and plaaaaay!

  369. Anna/Molly says:


  370. Anna/Molly says:

    Where are all the SD’s? JamesNY, SDN, TexaSD, JSO, NYGent, SG2, NCGent? Don’t tell me they’re doing that work thing again….sheesh!

  371. NYC SB says:

    Im here too… You covered Cleo’s question… I had nothing to add… youza smart cookie

  372. CA Dreamin SB says:

    I’m here…just in lurk mode :)

  373. Shoogar Shoes says:

    AM – I guess I scared them all off by waxing serious & legal poetic?

  374. Anna/Molly says:

    Where did everybody go?

  375. Shoogar Shoes says:

    cleo asked: how does a first sugar date differ from a first regular date?

    In my opinion they don’t differ much at all other than the fact that conversation points are accelerated. You typically don’t discuss finances, goals and the like on first regular dates, whereas you are open to these types of discussions on first sugar dates.

  376. Shoogar Shoes says:

    cleo – I guess some would see it as an ego thing, but as you know, it isn’t. I’m thankful I was raised by a very strong man who taught me not to be afraid of my own voice.

  377. Shoogar Shoes says:

    NYC SB – Thanks, gorgeous. “Ain’t nothin’ gonna break my stride, nobody gonna sloooow me dooown…oh no…I got to keep a-movin’…”

  378. cleo says:

    shooger: funny thing, i choose to use my powers for good and say it all the time. people look at me like i have SUCH an ego to say that. but everyone has their ‘powers’ mine just happen to involve brains and empathy and an ability to get people to see reality…

    how does a first sugar date differ from a first regular date?

  379. NYC SB says:

    Shoogar – I am glad you seem to be in good spirits 😀

  380. Shoogar Shoes says:

    * Damn – I pulled a Lily up there *

  381. Shoogar Shoes says:


    I did not mean to scare anyone or to make anyone become overly paranoid through sharing my series of unfortunate events. None of us are committing any kind of crime choosing to be here. (“working girls” excluded from that comment, obviously.) This “sugar life” is a lifestyle we have each chosen for our own personal reasons.

    Arrangements have been around for centuries. (do I need to bore all of you again with my facts of detailed research?) Arrangements ARE NOT a guise for prostitution and it has been proven time and time again in court hearings. (again, no need to bore you with specific citings) Do NOT be afraid of those who try to convince you otherwise – through verbal, written or other forms of threat.

    We are entitled to as much privacy as those in traditional relationships. If someone ever threatens you and tries to impact fear upon you for choosing this lifestyle, seek professional backup through law enforcement, security outlets (P.I. and the like) and legal counsel.


    * * * *

    Lily – Not that my opinion has much impact on what you do, but I saw your new blog and I am happy you have chosen to place a more positive and helpful spin on your approach. You are an active voice here and so many do read what you write and ultimately, you are a reflection of this sugar bowl. As my dad used to tell me, “Shoogar, you were gifted with a quick wit, sharp tongue and intelligence that you may not even comprehend at a young age. One day you will and it will be your choice to use those powers for GOOD.”

  382. NYC SB says:

    good morning… snow snow go away come again next week… BLAH!

  383. Naughty Molly says:

    Hi Cleo :)

    Thank you :)

  384. cleo says:

    sincere i’m online and can hook you and shooger shoes up if you want?
    sincere that’s so funny, one of the things i want an allowance for is to pay for more pilates lessons and a gym membership. but i guess that would only balance the ‘happy fat’

    anna molly it’s really nice to see you so happy

  385. Shoogar Shoes says:

    SincereSD – I’m sure trading the gym time for snuggle time is definitely worth it. It sounds like you are health-conscious anyway and as you know, muscle has memory. Besides, it’s fun sometimes to forgo what’s in season and reach into the “bargain” bin.

    Haven’t gotten the email yet, but I’m sure it’s a-coming.

  386. SincereSD says:


    “Happy Fat” looks good on my SB; the 7lbs has been added to the “best” area and definitely enhances her curves! On me, it’s made my almost “6 packs” into a bargain 7 pack. :(

    Wrt to deleted profiles, I sent you a message through a mutual friend.

  387. Naughty Molly says:

    Awwww, Sincere that is so sweet. You’re a good SD and your SB is a luck lady.

  388. Shoogar Shoes says:

    you guys are all smart here, I surmise you have solved who this is.

    Shoo= “Shoo, go away now!”

    SincereSD said: “…because of my SB and my weight has increased 5% due to less phyiscal activity (at the gym) and too much fine wine and fine dining.”

    SincereSD – In my world, we call that “Happy Fat”.

  389. SincereSD says:

    Not very enlightening answer but here’s my obligatory post:

    When do you find time for sugar?

    Typically evenings or weekends, although I take the occasional long break during the work day when my sugar calls or texts and says she misses me ;). I tend to work long hours and spend a lot of time at the gym as it’s easy to make time for sugar as long as I can plan in advance. To me, time is money but time is also very sweet when I’m with her.

    How does the sugar melt with the rest of your life?

    For any busy professional, sugar is hard to fit into one’s lifestyle. I have make time for her by scheduling in advance. That’s why I need someone who’s very organized and punctual. However, sugar comes at a cost (no pun intended). I do turn down my share of business engagements because of my SB and my weight has increased 5% due to less phyiscal activity (at the gym) and too much fine wine and fine dining.

    Has a sugar daddy or sugar baby taken some of your stress away lately? Care to share?

    Duh!! She always helps me take stress away. But at the same time, she can add some stress; I guess that’s normal in any relationship as you take the good with the bad.

  390. Shoogar Shoes says:

    To Nicole and everyone else who has emailed me off-blog, everything is copacetic. I cannot go into details about the investigation online, offline, email or in person. Just know I am safe and the appropriate courses of action are under way to get all of this behind me. Believe me, I am one tough cookie and have endured enough in life to handle such attacks. One thing this person did not realize, is the strength behind the person he/she chose to mess with.

    I have caught up on the blog, but just not responding as much.

    Nicole – thank you for your kind words. Have an amazing time in Vegas! I, for one, know you deserve that trip as well as the other sugar you have received and all the other sugar that will come your way.

    I am far from (as Flo called me) a “Profile Queen” (but thanks, Flo, I know you don’t compliment loosely). Nicole and I spent a lot of time together online perfecting her profile, but it was truly HER who won her SD’s heart in person. I knew someone would appreciate her sincerity, sweetness and all she has to offer, I just helped her package it better and present it with a big red bow.

  391. Lily says:

    I should definitely add that advice about deleting profiles to my Privacy/Safety article!! Who knew?!

  392. Anna/Molly says:

    I’m not really paranoid…. 😀

  393. Anna/Molly says:

    My mom would always tell me with a serious look, point her finger and say “It doesn’t matter where you are or what you’re doing, someone is alway watching”. Talk about a creepy thing to say to a kid….sheesh. No wonder I’m paranoid……LOL

  394. Lisa 2 sds, 2 x-lovers, 2 apartments says:

    Jade says: ” What you do in the dark will soon come to light “

    Yikes my mom tells me that all the time

  395. Shoogar Shoes says:

    SincereSD has given the best advice on deleting profiles. Through a day and a half of investigations now, I can attest to the fact that profiles are still very much active online even after they have been deleted. Photos generally will not appear, but all verbiage is still intact.

  396. Anna/Molly says:

    Sincere ~ I haven’t seen the weather report. Ugh, more snow….really? It wasn’t as bad yesterday as they had predicted, but still yucky none the less.

    Being snowed in with my SD…..hmmmm, that would be the best ever! Oh the fun we could have 😉

  397. Jade says:

    morning SincereSD ! * hugs *

  398. Anna/Molly says:

    When do you find time for sugar?
    I try and send some sweet sugar to my SD everyday whether it’s an email or a text, just to let him know I’m thinking of him.

    Has a sugar daddy or sugar baby taken some of your stress away lately? Care to share?
    Oh yes! Anytime I hear from my SD the stress instantly melts away. He is like a little ray of sunshine 😀

  399. SincereSD says:

    Good morning AM, Lily and Jade.

    AM, it’s going to be a nice day to be shacked in with your sugar today. I understand another snowstorm is about to hit the northeast.

  400. Lily says:

    So… BHSD is now saying he’ll go in with me 50/50 on the kitties, IF the deal goes through on Tuesday, which he estimated is 80% likely. I know this is interesting only to me, but…. Yes!! I’ll take that. Kitty dance….

  401. Lily says:

    Sincere, good tips!!!

  402. Anna/Molly says:

    Hi there Sincere! 😀

    Video games! One of my favorite subjects! I love to play video when I have time.

    Faveorite Games:

    Call of Duty

    Faveorite Classic Games:

    Prince of Persia
    Mortal Combat, loved playing Scorpion “Get over here” haha, I love it!
    The Three Vikings

    Now I’m in the mood to play video games….thanks guys! Now I won’t get any work done 😀

    Hope everyone is having a good day 😀

  403. SincereSD says:

    Jade says: ” What you do in the dark will soon come to light “

    Jade, that sounds very creepy in light of what elle is going through with her stalker.

    BostonHoney says: I deleted my profile some time ago too.

    Who knows if the information is still viewable if your account is deleted. To be on the safe side if you are deleting a profile, I would recommend you do the following:

    1. Delete your picture and change the information in the profile so it no longer resembles you in any shape or form;
    2. Wait for approval of your new profile;
    3. Then delete your account.

  404. Lily says:

    Jade, I have four body scars I wanna fade, plus it can help your face, too? Frown creases between eyebrows?

    LASB – you have many goodies on the way to you!!
    Cleo – you too!!
    CA Dreamin – you three, x 2 !!

    SCB – (((hugs))) it sucks to be cast aside, and I’ve been there. I hope he’s just busy, but if he’s active on sugar sites, then that is very unlikely the case. :(

    Megs & Sugarbarbie (& anyone else) – I know you’re frustrated with your search, and if I can help, I’d like to. I have a ton of free time this weekend. Email me off-blog perhaps & maybe I can help tweak your profile & discuss your prospecting (& weeding/filtering) techniques?

    I know I’m a sugar newbie & woefully imperfect, but I think I have some sort of a knack, relatively speaking, at this sugar baby thing (both finding/keeping).

    If I could give just one piece of advice when it comes to the early stages of dating, sugar or traditional, is that 99% of the time, if you’re left confused and wondering if everything is cool (or *still* cool), or if a recent signal was a red flag or ‘just nothing,’ then …..time to cut your losses (at least in your thoughts) & go ahead & move on. No need to burn the bridge, but if the ball is in his court, leave it there and assume you’ll never hear from him again. Focus your energies on finding something new that will stick.

    I have so many personal examples of when I hoped a pretty clear warning sign was ‘nothing’ and kept my hopes up, only to see in retrospect that i would have been vastly better served by just cutting my losses & expending my energies (largely mental/emotional) in other directions. After all, mr. ambiguous can always swoop back up & offer a good enough excuse & mend his errors with you, and that would be a lovely surprise, but foolish to hope for.

  405. Jade says:

    ” What you do in the dark will soon come to light “

  406. Lily says:

    I respect your reasoning, Sincere. I only had limited information to work with, and your decision makes all the sense in the world.

    Maybe you’ll find lasting love within a sugar relationship, and perhaps it will be long lasting, and when you’re single again, you and she can make it official. Hard to find that, for sure, but stranger things have happened.

  407. Jade says:

    Yea ! Lily gets to join the stamp club too !!!!!!!!!!!!!

  408. SincereSD says:

    From the last blog:

    Lily says: ((((hugs)))) to SincereSD. But still, I have to say…. you just have this one life. If what you want is to end your ‘failed marriage’ and find a long term relationship that works, maybe you have to re-evaluate what you consider your reasons are for saying that you ‘can’t afford’ to get divorced.

    Lily, thanks for your comments. I’m there because I choice to be. Tried the seperation thing but I missed the kids. Staying in stale marriage is my way to see my kids grown up as opposed to spending a couple hours here and there during custodial visits. I became a SD in order to meet my emotional and physical needs.

    I know it’s a short term bandage. When my kids grow up, I hope to be in a successful May-December relationship.

    ElegantSugar says: I miss NCGent, NYGent, SincereSD, AustinSD…who else?

    Miss you too. What was the aftermath of our lost wages marriage?

    Sorry, I’ve been much too busy to post let alone follow the blog.

    ElegantSugar says: DC – I LOVE tetris!!! And if ever we argue, I get the feeling we would just end up laughing hysterically anyway in the end.

    ES and DC, one of the best tetris games ever is Pokemon Puzzle League for Nintendo 64. Very challenging head to head play and a 3D 360* version. It got rave reviews and I’m miffed there isnt a multiplayer version for the Wii.

  409. Jade says:

    SCB – Most men are what they call ( one hit wonders ) or ( hit it and quit it ) Men can get caught up in the moment and think with the “little head” then later the “big head” takes over and they regret it.

  410. Naughty Molly says:

    I AM going to answer the questions. Don’t want to do it on my BB though.

    Morning all! 😀

  411. Lily says:

    I love Flo Rida’s spy school tips for safe meetings. I just posted an article on my blog about Privacy and Safety Tips, although I know I did NOT re-invent the wheel. If anyone wants to have a look and tell me if there’s something I completely forgot to say/mention, please tell me and I’ll add it in. Or if something I said is completely off-base, in your opinion, also tell me why and I’ll amend as needed.

  412. LASB says:

    Jade says:
    February 25, 2010 at 1:49 pm
    LASB – I am a stamping fool now………… I stamp my whole body almost !

    Jade – This thing is such a bad idea for borderline OCD types. If you’re a cutter, masochist, or tattoo addict, it’s probably even worse. By the way, I’m about to join your stamping fool’s club.

    Lily – Stamper is on it’s way.

  413. LASB says:

    Funny you should ask. I just looked at a few profiles where the SDs specified which races they would consider. I guess everyone has their own taste. Personally, I prefer that they state it up front so I’m not wasting anyone’s time by contacting them.

  414. hi bloggers question to SB’s and SD’s when it comes to sugar dating is race an issue because I can’t help but think that sometimes my profile get’s passed over due to my race what do you guys think

  415. Flo Rida says:

    Megs – well Elegant (or should I call her Profile Queen) was very practical at profile advice so she is your best bet. I’ve retired from profile advice – too much work, so maybe reach out to Elegant, if she’s preoccupied then give it some time and i’ll help you (but bear in mind I am Elegant). I’ve posted photography & body text advice before.

    i’m guessing you’re in sports or live entertainment marketing or in sports agency.

    the trick is not the profile or the photo it’s imagining your perfect SD and then asking what would interest them enough to contact you and then phtoing or profiling that – without a clear image of perfect SD it won’t work – go back to fundamentals of marketing and branding.

    Cleo – I have no idea why any woman doesn’t get a second date i’m the wrong person to ask as i’ve never had problems (sorry) maybe more flirting.

    The Americans learned about spying from the Brits, but the Brits were penetrated by the Russians, the Chinese are excellent at phsy-ops & the Middle eastern countries are great at torture. Maybe i’ll write a book about spy secrets for the novice but it’ll never sell.

    i’m sitting in front or a ROARING fireplace & it’s GREAT, as it’s cold outside

    Nite everyone.

  416. cleo says:

    i don’t know megs, i get very few emails but very rarely are they rude. often lame but rarely rude.

    yeah i have some thing going on where i don’t get a second date, sugar or otherwise… know i’m doing SOMEthing, don’t know what.

  417. Megs says:

    Wow. Just now got caught up. OMG Elle…. wow. I immediately made some serious changes to my SB life. I can’t afford to have someone find out either. My job/career and life would be completely upturned since I own my business, and so much could be destroyed by my Sugar life being revealed.

    Flo- I wish I knew which sport :) I’m deeply involved in the major sports (part of my career) – and would love to know just for the networking! haha I know I know – no telling, and I would never ask you to. Another part of my job that I am all too serious about. Confidentiality.

    Lily – Bengals don’t have to cost that much!!! I got mine (a female pure breed, 2nd generation, with papers) for only $600! Some males only cost $900.
    I miss my baby girl so much though… because of my career, life and apartment, I had to take her up to my boyfriend’s dad’s ranch so she could have room to roam safely. I barely see her anymore. *sniff*

    So, I’m going to answer the questions as best as I can – so far…Sugarland has added stress to my life. All the potSDs I have talked to have all wanted way more than just a “relangement”… or have been complete flakes. I’m still holding out on a few… but the silence is killing me.
    I want to share my profile wish someone here to get some ideas of what I might be doing to attract the wrong guys. I’m attracting plenty, no doubt about it! But… just the wrong ones. I just don’t want to link my profile on here…
    I’ve just had so many potentials – and absolutely no return. But I’m not sure if it’s partially my fault or not…. argh

  418. vima says:

    somebody here?

  419. TexaSD says:

    SCB- Yep in Texas, weather was ok here today also. Not that the weather gets me down or anything lol

  420. SCB says:

    Well I’m an old grandma so I’m off to bed. Hope everyone has a good night and is safe. (elle)

  421. SCB says:

    Everything is really good. The weather was AMAZING today. Almost makes up for the bad week. Forgive me if I am wrong but your in Texas? How is the weather there?

  422. TexaSD says:

    SCB- naa, just reading, thinking, and working lol… how about you? how is everything else with you? Where ya from lol

  423. SCB says:

    I think I scared every one away.

  424. chocolatediip says:


  425. SCB says:

    Flo- No harm done I was just a bit shocked when I googled it. I didnt know it was an expression and I took it too personally.

    Anyways…. I’ll keep you updated on my sugar world drama.

    I’m a little freaked out by the whole blog world now though after hearing about what happene to Elegant. I’m very glad she shared her experience so that we can all be a bit more safe.

  426. Flo Rida says:

    SCB – it was not meant that way and i’m sorry for the offense – slight – if it helps just think of it as changing your mind after making a decision. Heck I walked away from a $4.5k deposit once because I changed my mind, yes it was kinda stupid for me to pay $4.5k but I didn’t say I was smart. Once again very sorry.

  427. TexaSD says:

    SCB- Ya, he really might just be busy, I have been real busy the last few months, and sometimes just lazy to respond to people… not sure why lol… And again, he might just want another girl on top of you lol…

  428. SCB says:

    Hmmm It just seems like you are talking about buying and selling cattle or a new car or something.

    This isnt my first sd/sb relationship and I hope it isnt over but I’m going to give him the benefit of the doubt. I’m just going to see how it plays out. If he is looking for another SB, I wish him all the best. I’d just prefer a phone call or at the very least a text.

    Heres a good question, maybe a blog topic… Blog gods?? How have any of your SD/SB relationships ended?

  429. TexaSD says:

    Don’t think to much of it, Buyers Remorse is a figure of speech, its like dating a girl you just met, when in reality you really liked her best friend you just met…

  430. TexaSD says:

    ahh typos… He might be very busy… and I still think he is getting a 2nd/back up SB….

    Bought and sold…. ehh something like that, but you can chose nicer words if you want.

  431. TexaSD says:

    SCB- Well I would have said he is probably busy, however you mention the other site, its still possible him is just very busy… although I would still saying he is getting a 2nd/back SB…

  432. SCB says:

    I’m not going to lie. Im completely offended by the term “buyers remorse”. No one has bught me and I am NOT for sale. Really?? Is that how you think this goes?

  433. SCB says:

    Hey guys, Im still catching up but to answer everyones comment… Yes we made things official on both ends.

  434. TexaSD says:

    surgarbarbie- goodluck with your work.

  435. NYC SB says:

    haha i know you wouldnt… and i would never ask you to reveal it… i was joking around anywhoo…

  436. Flo Rida says:

    NYC SB – for the record i’m very happy with and loyal towards current SD (even if his income-wealth is lower & he’s stressed). Mr. Famous is a business deal – no points for guessing who he is BUT major brownie points for guessing who the handler is. BUT I would never reveal it anyway.

  437. NYC SB says:

    sugarbarbie – fingers and toes crossed

  438. sugarbarbie says:

    I got some work I got to finish up too. check you all later

  439. sugarbarbie says:

    *envy geez I’m tired lol

  440. Flo Rida says:

    SCB – sorry i’m exhausted but it’s also called ‘buyer’s remorse’ google it, it’s very common. Very sorry though.
    All – i’m going back to work, sad I know.

  441. sugarbarbie says:

    Flo Rida and NYC SB – Good points

    Hopefully my search is over for there is a extremely attractive and sweet SD that has caught my interest and if all goes well I will be in sugar heaven.

    I don’t even guys at all, this hunt is exhausting to say the least.

  442. NYC SB says:

    I saw that… and I liked it a lot… its all post it noted on my bedroom wall… dont worry broke bf is not around… i will write back once i get it in a fluid motion… and OMG $20 -100 mil… tell him, when they allow you to talk to him, I will do the job for much much less…

  443. NYGent says:

    SCB: NYCSB raises a valid point. There is a big difference between “officially” agreeing to an arrangment, then reneging (similar to breach of contract) versus preliminary negotiations that never ended up in a meeting of the minds (people are always free to back out before they sign on the dotted line).

  444. Flo Rida says:

    NYCSB – Hiya! I sent you an email to your old address – proof of concept plus strawman. I’m so tired, this guy is so famous that even his ‘handler’ is worth $20-100 million – scary.

  445. NYC SB says:

    Sugarbarbie – i think you are severely limiting your chance of finding an SD by eliminating the non picture profiles… just think about it… do you really want someone who has no concern of getting caught? someone who has nothing to lose if he gets discovered using this site? chances are a true SD will NOT have a clear face picture on his profile

  446. NYC SB says:

    Lily – to demonstrate NY Gents suggestion:

    “I wish I could see you tomorrow night. I just wont be able to get out of work on time in order to catch the last flight out”

    “Aww well in that case I can arrange for the jet to pick you up. What time works and which airport?”

    True story

  447. Flo Rida says:

    Sugarbarbie – Name – give him a nickname just be honest that it’s not your real name, Email – don’t include your real name in your email eg bigred1 @ g place dot come, Phone number – get a Trac disposable phone or others use some strange internet service that i’m backwards on. Yes he has a face photo of you but everything else you don’t need to disclose.

  448. NYC SB says:

    Hiya Flo – looks like we both had an exciting week

  449. NYC SB says:

    SCB – i think someone asked a super valid question… did you make things official? as in did he fulfill his part of the arrangement? did you?

  450. SCB says:

    I think he is having second thoughts too. We will see if he calls today. If he dosent, I’m going to just get on with my life. The thing is, I really like this guy so its going to suck.

    Why why why whhyyyy make things official if you are unsure about an arrangement? All you SD’s out there, I hope your sure before you lead a girl on!

    I’m SO much about honesty and my SD knows that which is why it sucks to have to wonder. Just be honest with me dude.

  451. Flo Rida says:

    NYGent – war is always changed from a historical perspective by the winner or if there was no winner from each participants perspective.

    SCB – he has either changed his mind (probability 99percent) or he is developing a back up plan (1percent). Sorry

  452. SCB says:

    I just read the blog and I am devastated to know about Elegants situation. I now feel bad for posting my petty worries. I am serriously considering deleting any online profiles. Some people are OUT of control and need to think about how seriously they can affect someones life.

    Elle- I’m SO. FREEKIN. SORRY. Truly terrified for you. Be safe and take these jerks down!

  453. sugarbarbie says:

    Hello ya’ll. I frequently see sd profiles that say no pic no response…I totally understand why. However, a majority of the time these sd’s don’t have on themselves. One can argue that these top execs have a lot to lose, but we can see from elle’s experience, so do we. On my behalf I’m sick of getting interested in an sd just to finally see him and discover I have no attraction to him. By this time he may have my email and/or my phone number, my first name which is pretty unique.

    I have decided to not even consider a sd that does not have a clear front face shot in their profile.

    I have one it’s only fair.

  454. Jade says:

    SCB – I hope you got the “arrangement” in hand before you made things ” official “.

  455. NYGent says:

    SCB: agree with TexaSD. It happens a lot on both sides.

    Flo Rida: I like BWI and BWII but then we have to define who were the Allies and who were the Axis, which gets tricky, though I’m sure you and I would agree . . .

    Lily: you see, if you just drop subtle hints as on the Bengals and let SD think it was his idea it works!

  456. TexaSD says:

    SCB- He is having second thoughts…

  457. SCB says:

    Hey Sugar World…
    I’m starting to get worried and I need someone to tell me im being stupid. My new SD and I made our arrangement official about 3 weeks ago. I reallllly like him and I think that despite our age difference we have a LOT of things in common, a lot of the same hobbies and want the exact same things out of our relationship. I saw him last friday and he said he would call me to arrange our next date. After three days I didnt receive a call. I sent him a text and he relpied about 8 hours later that he was super busy and would call me the next day. The same thing happened 3 days in a row now. I am totally the type of girl who can take a hint but I just thought things were going so well. I just wish he would let me know if he didnt want to do this anymore so that i could stop looking at my phone every two seconds. He probably just is busy but I also saw him logged on to a mutual site. I’m not looking but I guess he is?? Sheesh.

    Advice… Please??

  458. Flo Rida says:

    Elegant – wow, whiskey tango foxtrot, you have my sympathy and I will email you offline.

    All – now does everyone know why i’m paranoid about security, I think i’ve always been the biggest advocate for security.

    Someone posted some first date tips – spies will tell you that you 1) scout a meet place before meet for entrance and exit routes 2) don’t let date know location send him to an alternate location and tell him to wait for a phone call 3) he calls from that location for the next meet place 4) you have him tailed from the first to second meet place 5) in the public place post one or more surveillance spies who always have visual contact with you 6) place a tracking signal on you. Excessive yes but there is nothing more important than security.

    NYC SB – congrats on date

    Nicole – congrats on SD

    NYGent – we should have a nomenclature Blog War I or BWI for short for TX, Blog War II or BWII for me.

    I’ve been in the company of (american) sports royalty, though we haven’t spoken, someone who is so famous that he is instantly recognizable to pretty much everyone on this blog. Can’t reveal his name til gag order expires and I can only talk to his ‘handlers’ which lead me to thinking is this the most famous person i’ve ever been near, same room for most of 2 days (but not spoken to yet) and yes he is and who would that be for you.

    Ciao peeps i’m pooped.

  459. TexaSD says:

    On a less serious side note, How is everyone?

  460. TexaSD says:

    Yaz- I actually think possible believe this may be handled fairly soon, unless this person is professional, when he wrote the letter, was wearing gloves? does he have a certain handwriting style, does he live near? Which postoffice got the letter first before it was distributed? I don’t know where Elegant is, hopefully the police are capable, and she is going to press them daily… the worst someone can do, is give the police too much slack… they are like children sometimes, and need constant supervision lol…

  461. Yaz says:

    oh also you should get in touch with NYGent!!!!

  462. TexaSD says:

    Elegant-= Sorry this has happened to you. If you need some advice, please let me know, and If you have not done it yet, please contact the police, and possibly your business partners and advise them what is going, I know this can be possibly humiliating, but you will need their cooperation, incase they have already been contacted… if you need further advice, I will allow stephan to give you my email. good luck, If you are capable of updating us, that would be nice.

  463. Yaz says:

    Wow that is terrible…..

    To all of you who have personal blogs please please be careful! you never know who reads them and also reads the SA blog.

    Elegant I hope it was just a bad joke and the person will not try to do anything else. Please have someone with you at all times until this passes! Keep us posted.

  464. Lily says:

    Jade, he has no reason to do that. We won’t have any time to see each other before he finds out, so it’s just virtual glory from a distance he’s theoretically getting, for four days, if he’s just blowing sunshine up my arse. He still could be doing that for the email thank yous, but that is pretty small motivation. But I’m still trying not to get excited.
    ESB- yup, I’ve been wanting some for 7 years.

  465. Jade says:

    Lily: From my exp when a man says he might do something if “such and such” happens then he is just looking to get all the glory as if he gave the gift …………with tons of thank yous and then in the end come up short.

  466. ESB says:

    Lily: have you done any research on Bengal cats? Ya might want to do that before bringing them home. I have a client with 3 of them, she paid $1500 a piece for hers, they are not the best pets.

  467. Lily says:

    Jade, where can I get it? Hmmmmmm…….. I need a stamp!

    ES- Your situation sucks. I hope it gets resolved quickly and easily.

    I can’t resist posting my sugar update. My blog, too, has just been completely overhauled. I am trying to somehow make it less of a personal journal of my own narrow life experiences, and more easy to navigate for a newbie who might find something useful from my perspective on some frequently-wondered-questions, re: arrangements and finding/getting/managing one (or more). IF anyone cares to comment on my blog, or on this blog addressed to me, re: the changes I made to my blog, that’s very cool and I’m open to criticism.

    But anyway, non-important (but kind of interesting for one day) update:

    The guy from last night’s chat room scare asked me to meet for drinks tonight. I was trudging through the snow to get there, listening to my iPod, he stared at me for a couple of seconds as he had just been leaving, and I didn’t know it was him, just thought it was a handsome man…. I waited inside 20 minutes until he texts me from home saying that he had left at such-and-such time, right when I had *arrived*, and we quickly figured out that we had made eye contact and not been sure each was the other and not said anything. Argh! His wife would have been too suspicious if he would have run back out (why did he not bring a cell phone with him?! He should have enough extras that there is always a phone he can bring with him everywhere) so we postponed meeting until lunch tomorrow.

    Yes, it’s the same one from the “Hello, Clarise” incident last night. I want to meet him face to face and get to know him as a friend and business(editing work he says he wants me to do)/music contact (he’s also a singer, and his brother is a music producer), and also just so I can be SURE that he is what he appears to be, and not undercover or something.

    (re: my actual arrangements— Zaza claims everything is still the same as before, my bengal demands changed nothing for him, …..that i deserved them, but he just couldn’t. I think he and I are still good, but we have no set date for when to see each other next month. He’s far. :(

    I never thought to ask BaldHottie, but he figured out I had my eye on Bengals from my mentioning their features in a ‘pets conversation’, and I said two days ago, in passing, that I would love some but they were ridiculously overpriced. Tonight he emails me and asks how much they are. I tell him they are 4k USD for two, and he says he’ll find out on monday if a certain business deal is going through, but if it *does,* then he’ll get the kitties for me. I think my jaw hit the floor. I didn’t see that coming. I almost started crying over my laptop, at the email. I emailed him back as much, and he said, “Hey, with me, nothing is impossible.” It was his total intention to impress me but even though I see that, it worked!!! I hope on monday we find out only good things about the deal he’s closing right now, it gets signed/sealed/delivered, and I can call the cattery and tell them that those two brother kittens are moving in with ME! He got his brownie points, for even wanting to do that for me.)

  468. sugarbarbie says:

    😮 :(

  469. ESB says:

    Lisa, I am so happy for you!! Big WOOT!!

    ES: If you hve my email, I have to tell you something about what is happening to you. May or may not be anything, but want to let you know.

    Everyone Else!! HI!! Im going to try to not be here long…

    We did NOT get any snow last night, but they are calling for it tonight.. yea, well, we shall see….

  470. Naughty Molly says:

    Where did everyone go?

  471. Jade says:

    Lily- It is not in the usa

  472. Lisa 2 sds, 2 x-lovers, 2 apartments says:

    thanks Molly

  473. Naughty Molly says:

    That’s great Lisa!

  474. Lisa juggling 2 sds says:

    Hi SD :) Hope your having a good day

    I’m days away from the other side of the freeway :)

    Finally got approval, made all necessary transfer calls, just need to pack, grab percy and leave on monday

  475. ElegantSugar says:

    Thank you all of you for your support and kind words – sorry I’m not posting individual thanks, on hold at the moment on the phone and emailing as well as a jillion other things.

    Lisa’s SD – There is a specific reason why I was advised to post it here. Thank you very much for your concern though.

  476. Naughty Molly says:

    Elegant – so sorry to hear about your troubles! I hope things get better soon!

    Hi everybody! 😀

  477. Lisa's SD says:

    Elegant –

    In addition my opinion is it was a bad idea to mention the incident and the investigation. You may have alerted and aided the wrong person.

  478. cleo says:

    nycsb: i have to do a little searching and i’ll send you all the info i have, but drop me a line to remind me to look as am swamped right this minute

  479. Lisa's Possibly Not Former SD (The one in NY) says:

    Elegant – Just read your initial post. Sorry for you.

    It is interesting that a group of people right here on this blog spent the better part of the past year attempting to investigate who I am – both my profile and my actual personal info. They have taken it upon themselves in recent days to send “information” they allege to an SB I am courting in order to interfere with the possiblity of an arrangement. They have caused additional expense and far worse made the coutrship far less pleasant.

    Yes one has to be very careful. I diligently never linked my blog self even with my profile. Regardless, the above has occured, and one of my earlier arrangements was announced to the blog without permission. That sin was apparently not enough, and the latest deed has been done.

    All the best.

  480. Beach_ Girl in LA!!! says:

    Hey everyone!

    Elegant~ i am so sorry… i know how hard it is! I am sure things will get better soon

    OC, girl mail me… I don’t have your email with me 😀

  481. BostonHoney says:

    Elegant that is very scary. I deleted my profile some time ago too. I have had IRL stalkers that is why this girl packs a Loaded 45, learned kickboxing, Took self defense classes and I try to be aware of my surroundings, always check car, and try to get people to share who they are, names, companies etc… It’s very easy to get excited and share too much information.

    God doesn’t make us even but Glock sure does! They have great purses too…

  482. nubiansugar says:

    I am fairly new to the sugar dating world and have heard the horror and success stories alike i’m so sorry about what happened with you elegant my prayers go out to you.This made me want to write something on sugar dating for example meeting someone for the first time some of us prefer never to make the first date at someones home it’s basic common sense but some of us still do it and even knowing someone does not put you out of risk when going to their home for the first time I think there are tips to make sure your safe here are my first home visit rules
    1)ALWAYS have someone who knows where you will be- I know some of us do not have close friends that we can share our sugar life with but this is important tell a friend lie and say it’s a regular guy you have been seeing
    2) make sure that friend has his home address and and phone number-this is where trust comes in that your friend is a real friend and won’t abuse this information this is important to so in case anything does happen the police will know where to start looking
    3)get a license plate number-try to get the potential SD’s plate number this will help the police to
    4)have a check in time with your girlfriend estimate how long it will take you to get there and give yourself a large window of time you don’t want your friend to panic when you don’t call simply because your having such a good time
    5)try not to drink anything pre-opened i stick to bottled water or wine opened right in front of me
    I know these rules sound paranoid but a friend of mine got gang raped she didn’t press charges because she didn’t want her family to find out what she was up to we all need to keep safe

  483. Lily says:

    Ele- so scary. So in line with the freaked-out thing last night with the chat room guy suddenly knowing my first name (very “hello, Clarise”, a la silence of the lambs–scary!!)…

    Jade/LASB/anyone – stamp from the US in exchange for a mystery goodies gift package from Europe worth at least the same as what you spent on the stamp?? I am so scarred up!!!! Swap?! Please?!

  484. AnnaMadrid says:

    Elegant- That has just totally shocked me! I’m really in shock.. I hope everything is being done to help you find that insane person who’s doing this to you! I really am sorry this is happening, you will be in my thoughts all day! Good luck honey!

  485. Jade says:

    LASB – I am a stamping fool now………… I stamp my whole body almost !

  486. LASB says:

    Elegant – Sorry for what’s happening to you. That really sucks and freaks me out!

    NYC SB – There are tons of pages on the Master Cleanse. Most will talk about eating/cheating, breaking the fast, probiotics and the likes.

    Jade – Thanks for the info. I am trying to be patient, but damn I want instant results!!! haha. The scar still looks like its same ugly self today. So then I started to wonder if I did it enough. I guess I’m supposed to wait for the collagen to grow, though.

  487. My SD had an issue with a past SB where she attempted to extort him for quite a large sum of money. Luckily, he has a FIERCE lawyer and a letter from him was enough for her to realize she did not know who she was messing with. (personally, why would you bite the hand that feeds you?? that seems ludicrous!)

    When do you find time for sugar?

    Since I don’t work very often (once a week for a few hours)…I have all the time in the world. Which is great because doing things for my sugar takes up a ton of time! I mean keeping his laundry done, house clean, picking up dry cleaning, going shopping for him, keeping myself as beautiful as possible…Is a full time job! haha

    How does the sugar melt with the rest of your life?

    My sugar and I have much more of an actual relationship, he knows all my friends and even my mother! She loves him! At first I wondered/worried what people would say when I had a relationship with someone decades older than myself, but found people were much more accepting than I expected….and a major bonus as well as confidence booster that mom loved him!!!! (Although she doesn’t know the *whole* truth about how we met)

    Has a sugar daddy or sugar baby taken some of your stress away lately? Care to share?

    My SD has taken soooo much stress out of my life because now I don’t have to worry how the rent is getting paid or how my cell phone is late, and of course how am I going to buy that cute dress I saw at White House Black Market hehehe

    NYC SB- We are going to come to NYC for my first time in June. Would love to get some recommendations for a cute boutique hotel and your fav restaurants/clubs/bars when its closer to that time.

  488. NYC SB says:

    Cleo – what home page? can you send me the link???

  489. cleo says:

    LASB i did a lot of research before i did the cleanse and the homepage is all about why you shouldn’t eat. i feel like i’m watching a train wreck from a distance and i can’t do anything to stop it.
    elegant: aw babe that bites sucks and chews… and not in the awesome sex bruises kind of way.

    i’m sorry this is happening to you.

  490. TXSB says:

    I’m not caught up on the blog and just wanted to glance at a few posts before I run out to take care of some errands. But I just saw your post regarding the “threats” and wanted to say that I’m sorry that you’re going through this. I enjoy reading your posts and completely understand you wanting to “take a break” due to this. Just know that my thoughts are with you. *BIG VIRTUAL HUG* I 2nd Taz….you’re not bringing anyone “down”.

  491. East Coast Filly says:

    Elegant, just wanted to say I am sorry this is happening to you!! I hope you figure it all out and nothing happens personally or professionally to mess you up.
    I noticed your blog was down just before I hopped on over here.


  492. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    Elegant – call it a ‘gut feeling’ but get all the info you can about him..obviously. you are not bringing down the blog – we are here to help and support each other!

  493. ElegantSugar says:

    Taz – all fingers are pointing towards my last incident, but it is hard to tell. My profile has been deleted for three weeks – so I am not sure if our profiles actually stay up or not after we delete them. IF they are, then this was something pre-meditated long before that incident.

    Ok, guys…please carry on with your earlier conversations. I don’t want to freak anyone out. I’m just a little freaked out myself.

  494. ElegantSugar says:

    Jade is right. My home & business addresses are easily found through google if you know my first and last name.

    I am sorry to bring down the blog – I really am. I just wanted to let all of you know and perhaps once I calm down (and cool off) from this scare, I will catch up. I haven’t even read what the new blog is about. (Sorry, guys.)

    I am peeved, a little scared, hurt and feel violated all at once.

  495. ElegantSugar says:

    NYC SB – I do not know. I am in constant contact with my past 2 SDs – of whom are both married – but both are in “open” marriages so it would not be either one of their wives. I have been in touch with both today and they are helping me through it with their personal/professional resources.

  496. Jade says:

    LASB- I stamp at home . I have one scar I stamped twice and can not see at all now !

  497. Jade says:

    Once again ladies…..Do not give out personal information regardless of who you THINK you can trust.

  498. NYC SB says:

    wow Elegant… that is INSANE! Why would someone want to do this?

  499. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    No kidding elegant – could it have to do with the most previous bad pot date?? Not pointing fingers..just saying…

    Hmmm…if they send you my addy (blog gods?) we can chat a bit further if you would like…

    stay grounded chica :) ( I know, I know – easier said than done..)

  500. ElegantSugar says:

    DC – It is very serious. The allegations within the letter, if sent to any of my business contacts could possibly be grounds for a libel lawsuit. I have a virtual office in NYC and the receptionist there said they also received an unmarked yellow envelope for me there so I am not sure where all this “packet” has gone.

    I seriously am not wanting to scare anyone but, this has honestly shaken me up beyond belief and I hope it passes soon. It could very well be someone’s idea of a sick, sick joke – but I am treating it as a serious matter until it is resolved.

    Those who contact me off-blog, please feel free to continue doing so.

  501. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    As for my last post – to DC as well?? Please?

  502. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    OMG Elegant – wtf? You know we are here if you need anything…since you won’t be posting much – OC or stephan can you pass my addy to Elegant please??

  503. DC says:

    Elegant, I’m so, so terribly sorry to hear that. & I hope that you discover who this person is & take the appropriate legal action.

    With that said, I think I’ll be signing off the blog indefinitely myself. This has gotten highly out of control.

    Everyone who has my email off-blog, keep in touch =)

  504. ElegantSugar says:


    My apologies, but I have not read a single post today as my focus has been on a very serious matter.

    I received a threatening letter in the mail this morning (via snail mail) regarding my sugar dating. I have sought legal advice (as well as one good blog friend’s advice) and have disabled my personal blog. Due to the content of the letter and the nature of the threats, there will be a full investigation to determine the origin of the letter. It wasn’t post-marked, which is very strange. Came in a large yellow envelope. The contents of the envelope were a typed written letter as well as a copy of my old SA profile and has been implied that it has been sent to others who know me.

    I have A LOT at stake here (business & personal) and will not be taking this lightly. I was advised to post on here that there will be a full investigation and I have arranged to have security as well as live surveillance of my home immediately. (It’s good to have friends in this field)

    I am not trying to scare anyone, but please be very, very careful. All of you. This was very unexpected and as one blog friend knows, I have been in tears over all day. I know we have had our differences here, but I still consider you all friends.

    I do not know how much more I will be posting.

  505. LASB says:

    Oh yeah, I tested it out last night on this horrible scar I have from being scratched in soccer. Today it’s red. I’ll give it a month and try it again and let you know if it works. :)

  506. LASB says:

    Thanks Jade! Do you do it yourself or go to a doctor? I watched a video on some doctor’s website, and she was all bloody!! But I have the stamp, and it seems pretty mild.

  507. Jade says:

    Dr natura has a cleanse that comes with flora replacement pills.

  508. Jade says:

    LASB – I do derma stamp about once a month. I noticed a difference right away . It looks like a sunburn after treatment is all. I had a sun spot that was starting to show up and I stamped it and poof it was gone ! I stamped some old scars on my legs as well and they look 50 percent better already. You have to give the skin time to heal before you stamp again.

  509. LASB says:

    Cleo – I was wondering if you were going to pop on here and say that. I don’t know a lot about the master cleanse, but my guess is that beer is a really bad idea because of the yeast and because you’ve probably flushed your system of it’s own flora.

  510. cleo says:

    oh god nycsb stop eating while you’re fasting. and yes alcohol is food. drink peppermint tea, water, straight maple syrup or the lemonade (and of course your laxative tea) but dude you are NOT doing your digestion any favours and i am very worried about you

  511. NYC SB says:

    My SDs do not know I blog… or do they???

    I dont disclose this fact bc the blog is MY outlet… its MY space to ask questions and talk about sugar… I would rather keep it that way…

  512. NYC SB says:

    Northeastern SB – Yes I have a bf too… I see him 3 times a week… NYC SD once a week… and NYSE once or twice a month for a weekend. No they do not know about each other. How do I keep them straight? They are all so different so its not that hard. I did not plan on this happening but it did… and since it is NSA its all fair game as no one has requested exclusivity. Of course this is not the norm… a lot of SBs tend to have one SD… I just got incredibly lucky

    Nicole_babe-SB – thanks for the kind words… and yes Elegant is super awesome… as is Flo my sugar sister 😀 congrats on the SD!!!!!

    Vegas tips! Anything goes… classy black dress… and super skanky dresses alike… when im in vegas I pack tons of bikinis (although idk how the weather is right now)… sexy lingerie in case you go to a lingerie party at the palm… and last but certainly not least don’t pack too much… shopping in vegas is awesome…

    Shows? Probably cirque de solei … which are awesome btw… but you can wear anything there… again LBD goes a LONG way

  513. LASB says:

    Hey Jade – Are you the one who spoke about the Derma Stamp? If so, how often do you use it and how long have you been using it for?

  514. Jade says:

    Most Sd’s have no time for blogs miles long.

  515. Lily says:

    I shop at thrift stores, almost exclusively. I love it. Creativity & a good eye trumps unlimited funds any day (well, maybe that’s exaggerating but still!). And good posture, warm smile, an relaxed confidence looks better than anything. (the opposite is true– insecurity, hunched shoulders, stress on your face will ruin any glam/pricey outfit ).

  516. CA Dreamin SB says:

    I second DC on the Safe sex / birth control conversations – they need to happen!

  517. DC says:

    nicole, my SD knows i post on the blog. he doesn’t read it though, no time.
    & birth control and safe sex are definitely something both parties should (and do, I hope) talk about.

  518. nicole_babe_sb says:

    thank you everyone for your advise on what to wear!!! i have one more questin then i have to run for work. do any of your sds ask you to go on the pill?

  519. nicole_babe_sb says:

    girls do you tell your sds that you post on this blog? i want to be honest in case he reads it but i feel if things dont go well this is a place that could help me too.

  520. CA Dreamin SB says:

    Nicole- Absolutely NOTHING wrong with shopping at thrift / second hand stores! Some of my FAVORITE dresses came from second hand stores! I’m sure you’ll look great whatever you wear!

  521. nicole_babe_sb says:

    there is another place i met a girl online who hleped me with my sugar hunt too. her name is angelxndr and she is on the sugar daddy babes blog. she gave me lots of advice like flo rida nyc sb and elegant did. i have these four girls to thank for not giving up.

  522. CA Dreamin SB says:

    Nicole – Chances are the highs are going to be around 70 and the lows in the low 50’s upper 40’s. Just discuss with your SD what you should bring and HAVE FUN!!

  523. DC says:

    Nicole I agree w/ CA, bring a couple of cocktail dresses (you can always dress a little black dress up or down so it’s versatile) and some nice tops you can wear with dark/skinny jeans and boots/heels.

  524. nicole_babe_sb says:

    ca dreamin>> thank you so much, I never wanted to post before because all of you seem so fast for me and offline I am really shy. I am from a very poor poor poor family and just moved to a bigger city and i’m trying to work on my shyness. i feel so dumb around here sometimes. everyone dresses in nice clothes and don’t get me wrong i do know how to dress nice i just shop at thrift stores and luckily looks don’t cost nothing. LOL :)

  525. DC says:

    Oh Vegas……….. good times.
    You’re going in early March? I imagine it can’t be too too warm there yet. It’s not all fancy dresses at all, in fact I’d say the opposite. Unless you’re seeing a show no one gets dressed up hardly at all.

  526. nicole_babe_sb says:

    nyc sb>> i love your new post and that is something i nver thought of was to get a track phone.

  527. CA Dreamin SB says:

    Nicole – You do NOT sound dumb at all! Please dont ever think that – I know we have all heard it a thousand times, but there are no dumb questions. I think you will be fine if you take a cocktail dress and heels, Also take some nice skirts and tops. How long will you be there? Do you have a friend you could borrow a dress from?

  528. DC says:

    Nicole, thanks babe =) my SD is my little sugar cookie muffin bear (k I promise I won’t disclose anymore sappy nicknames)

  529. nicole_babe_sb says:

    ca dreamin>> he said some shows and dinner but didn’t say what shows. we have a date tonight so i will ask him what show? i don’t mean to sound so dumb. i’m from a very small town nd really haven’t travled much.

  530. DC says:

    Isn’t it Google Voice or Google Wave or something? It’s been around for quite a bit…..

  531. Lily says:

    oh, and NortheasternSB – I have two (non-exclusive, obviously) SDs, and I think there are some others who have two. Keeping it all straight is easy since I’m a many-friends kind of person anyway, and one lives out of town and can rarely see me, and the other one is married and evenings/weekends are locked down at home. I have a loooooooot (ok, almost all) of my evening ‘date nights’ still wide open, and I would find myself bored except for all my friends in town that i hang out with. No problems keeping the two men ‘straight.’

  532. CA Dreamin SB says:

    Nicole – I would say it depends on what you’ll be doing. Have you asked SD? I would just ask him what you’ll be doing there so you have an idea of what you need to pack. Some places you would want a fancy dress, but not everywhere.

  533. Mandy says:

    Some people are so hard for attention.

  534. nicole_babe_sb says:

    since i’m on here can some of you give me advice on what to pack for las vegas since i have never been? i don’t know what we’re doing yet but imagince las vegas is all about fancy dresses? i dont’ know if i have any and i dont’ want to ask my new sd to buy any for me b/c he has done so much for me already. any tips girls?

  535. Lily says:

    Northeastern SB – it’s on NYC SB’s blog, her latest entry I believe.

  536. nicole_babe_sb says:

    sugarbarbie>> your photo on this blog is cute. don’t give up on your sugar hunt!!!!

    dc>> your photo is cute too and your sd sounds so perfect!!

    nyc sb>> i love the black eyed peas!!

  537. Northeastern SB says:

    What is the google app that hides your phone number? Thanks Lily for the advice and I love your long post.

  538. nicole_babe_sb says:

    hi everyone in teh sugar bowl!!!! I am a big time lurker her to this blog and this is my very first post.

    I am sooooo happy!!! I have my first sugar daddy and he is so amazing!!!! It took me seven months everyone so please keep trying and don’t give up!!!seven months is a long time to hang in there.

    I have three people from this blog i want to say a big thank you to:

    flo rida>> I copied the list of tips you posted on a word document and kept it taped to my computer. you always give great advice! :)

    nyc sb>> I have used some of the tips on your blog and i love the stories you share with us here. you never come across as bragging and your stories always inspired me to not give up!! keep up the good work with your blog!! :)

    last and not least becausde my biggest thank you goes to >>>

    elegant sugar>> omg omg omg!!! i contacted elegant after reading what she writes here and also from reading her blog. i told her about how i was about to give up. she helped me completely change my profile and i even sent her 20 photos and she helped me pick three for my profile. i couldn’t believe it after i posted the new one!! i started getting mail in my box from pots!!! she even helped me through that part too. i went out on a total of 5 dates before i finally met the one sd that is already changing my life around so much for the better!! he is so so so wonderful. i was so nervous about so much and elegant was the only person i could turn to and she always gave me teh best advice and never made me feel like i was bothering her. i sent my new sd the link to her article about how arrangements are real relationships and he loved it so much. i asked him if we are still together in six months could she interview us and he said yes!! LOL. i would never tell hm about this blog though. :( i’m sorry girls but some of you would make him feel bad about being an sd and make him feel used. i don’t want to point out just one person but it is bad. puke puke.

    anyway, my sd is taking me to las vegas for the first time ever. i am so so so so excited!!!! (elegant can you help me pick out clothes? LOL)

    have a good day everyone and please girls don’t give up!!!! :)

  539. Northeastern SB says:

    NYC SB ohhh, I wish I went to that concert too. I love BEP’s. Do your SD’s know about each other? Don’t you have a IRL boyfriend too? How do you possibly manage all of this in your life?

    How many SB’s have multiple SD’s and vice versa? How do you keep it all straight? I think I am one women one SD kind of gal.

  540. Lily says:

    sugarbarbie, dont’ give up hope. I loved your profile. Have you condensed it yet?

  541. sugarbarbie says:

    Ok lovely ladies, lurkers and gents…gotta get my day started and burn some calories. Check you later! Mwah!

  542. sugarbarbie says:

    I say definitely a lot today haha

  543. sugarbarbie says:

    Thanks DC I will definitely do that.

  544. sugarbarbie says:

    DC I definitely want what you have more of a BF, I don’t expect that though, not in my town.

  545. DC says:

    Barbie & photo – at least you know that once you’re in an arrangement, it was worth waiting for =)

    Barbie, also – as soon as you get those pics, put them on your profile. I think it’ll make a huge difference.

  546. DC says:

    aw, NYC thank you =)
    that sounds pretty much just like him & I. I have tastes akin to David Guetta, Tiesto, Benni Benassi to the Black Eyed Peas and Jay-Z. He likes the (classical) rock, jazz.. stuff.

    he was so shy and awkward at dinner! and then grumpy, for.. reasons you already know. it’s tough on him.

  547. sugarbarbie says:

    Morning DC and Photogirl…I haven’t given up…being patient…In fact I’m thinking of things I can do to keep my mind off of sugar hunting until I get those pics. I think that is my problem…every time a POT is interested they ask to see full length pics and I have to give them the explanation on how I’m waiting for some that were just taken at an event…how my camera phone sucks etc…

    I think they think I am BS’ing. I will definitely have them today and hope sending them will make a difference.

    If the weather warrants I’m going hiking.

    Lily, wow I know you were on pins and needles, glad it worked out…hope he’s cute lol.

  548. photogirl says:

    Hi NYCSB – Doing just fine over here… My patience skills are rather good at this point 😉 Glad things are going so well for you.

  549. NYC SB says:

    Hiya photogirl – havent talked to you in a while… how are you dear?

  550. NYC SB says:

    DC – NYC SD and I have somewhat similar tastes… as in he will tolerate the Black Eyed Peas but would much rather listen to some rock… and as I told him yesterday… the only rock songs I know are the ones which are on my Rock Band and Guitar Hero… he said he will fix that for me…

    On another note… You and DC SD are so cute together… he had that adoring look during dinner… it was rather sweet!

  551. photogirl says:

    sugarbarbie – I do not have a SD either…patience dear.

  552. Lily says:

    I posted this on the last blog before I knew there was a new one–

    I updated my blog about my personal sugar situation, for all of you who want to read it. I tried to remain brief but there was plenty to log in, today, on my sugar saga. Mostly positive or neutral.

    To all lurkers who email me and ask that I cue them in *here* on SA that I have updated my blog, so they can go look: Can you possibly just ‘follow’ the blog of your own accord to be notified of updates, i.e. bookmark the page and check in every so often yourself, so I don’t need to cue you in here on the SA blog that I have updated? I am updating rather regularly, so you won’t be often disappointed to find it dusty and old-news, I promise. I don’t want to draw attention to my blog here at all, given this week’s events. Thanks for understanding.

    Re: privacy concerns – I have a story about this, that’s indeed about me and my sugar life for those who don’t have any issue with getting a glimpse of that, which has a good beginning, scary middle, and a good ending. Besides the entertainment value, you might realize why I considered it a wakeup call about phone numbers/identities/etc.

    NYC SB has a great update on her blog about a google service which is similar to getting a vumber that forwards calls to your cell phone, so you can keep your phone number and identity more private until you trust someone. Yesterday I realized that I shouldn’t be so naive, and should get one myself.

    I was in a local area chat room, and put right in my username that I was seeking an arrangement as my purpose for socializing there. Several married men approached me, etc, and felt out what I meant by an ‘arrangement’ and all was fine. One was particularly adept in english, said he understood very well what I meant and was interested, and we talked for awhile. Even exchanged photos via my gmail account associated for sugar (and my blog). I felt naive/brave and gave him my number and said to call me if he was serious (I had often gotten this far only to have the guy abruptly POOF, but usually if a person will call me, with an unblocked phone number, that indicates that he’s not just fantasizing about being able to be a SD, but that he is serious in what he is saying). He said he wasn’t alone and would call the following day after ten am. I didn’t expect him to, and I emailed him and said, “did you even save my number?” and simultaneously chatted on the chat room with him (we were simultaneously emailing and chatting, yes).

    The chat turned towards him wanting me to name a specific amount of financial assistnace that I had in mind. I never did so, told him it had much to do with many different factors and impossible to say, but he pushed and pushed. Finally I said, “Well, if you must pin me down to a ball-park amount, I suppose I could say that if you are in the income bracket where 3 digits is the most you would be able to spend towards an arrangement, per month, then I would most likely keep scouting around for someone who can help out with a 4 digit amount.”

    He then suddenly said, “Good luck with your search.” and emailed me, “I have saved and registered your number _____.” The _____ being my real first name!!!!!! My blood ran cold. I started to sweat. I went to him in the chat room and asked what registered meant. He said, “nothing.” and then I asked again, and he copy/pasted the sentence where I discussed 3 figures vs. 4 figures.

    I panicked. I thought maybe he undercover, or he knew me, or he was for *whatever reason* trying to pin me for prostitution, for having mentioned even vague amounts of financial contributions involved in a relationship that (although never stated directly) had overtones of being romantic/dating/extra-marital-activity in nature. He cut out out of the chat instantly. I cursed the shitty day I was having and went to bed.

    Today, after BaldHottieSD dropped me off at home, my phone rings. The number clearly displayed on my phone, as a local mobile phone. I answer. It’s the guy. He warmly introduces himself and apologizes for having to end our chat conversation suddenly the night before. I play along casually and ask him how he knew my name. He said that it’s quite easy to do a reverse phone search in this country and he was simply curious as to who the number was registered to. We ended up talking and talking about everything under the sun, and having a big laugh about how I had panicked the night before about him, he admitted that with running his own company and a stressful marriage, the LAST thing he wanted to do was create drama in this world. Turns our we are both singers, we have a lot of common interests, I told him stories about my traditional dating disasters, we had big chuckles, and my thoughts leading towards sugar dating, and he said he appreciated how open I was. I even told him about about having two SDs at the moment and describing those dynamics. He ended up asking me if I would do some translating work for his company’s website and I agreed. He asked if I could come say hello if he and some colleagues were going out for a drink in an elegant bar in town around 9pm, and i said I would drop by and introduce himself. I hung up the phone so glad to have made a connection with such a eloquent, genuine-sounding, warm-sounding, intelligent man who seems open to having quite a few ties between us in this city (not at all put off by the fact that I am sugar dating these days, or finding any moral objections to that). Let’s see how well we get along in person this evening. At the very least I am no longer worried about this guy spelling trouble in my world but….

    I am not certainly going to start only giving out my other phone number, which is a secret number which doesn’t show up in any searches or associated to my name. And just to be on the safe side, hint at no numerical values of financial contributions that I would ever have in mind re: hypothetical arrangements. I’ll wait until live meeting and discuss that in person.

    Lessons learned. I am sorry to have posted such a long one, but wanted to share the newfound sugar wisdom I have learned, to hopefully benefit others.

  553. DC says:

    Morning Barbie, you haven’t given up on your sugar search yet have you? I don’t think you should.

  554. sugarbarbie says:

    I can not answer the questions because I have no SD :( Sugarland is still a fantasy world to me.

  555. DC says:

    How does the sugar melt with the rest of your life?
    It blends right on in there. Like NYC SD and NYC SB, my SD has met my friends and vice versa.. we are both all up in each other’s lives.

    Has a sugar daddy or sugar baby taken some of you stress away lately? Care to share?
    Yes. A ton. I would share, but most of it is very personal… suffice it to say, I can lean on the SD for anything in the world.
    And he can expect the same from me. =)

    Anddddddd, I wish it were Friday.

  556. sugarbarbie says:

    Hello everyone!

    NYC SB – Your guys sound dreamy. Thank you so much for sharing! I love reading ya’ll stories….being somewhat a newbie it gives me hope when I’m struggling with getting an arrangement to stick. It like a cinderella story…kinda

    I hope you guys never hold back with sharing your stories…or perhaps email them to me because I will never get bored of reading them.

  557. DC says:

    The blog is moving rather slow this morning.. I guess I could answer some more questions.

  558. DC says:

    NYC, I would def love to go. The SD & I have this GIANT list of things we have got to do, and are finding ourselves accomplishing none of it. A concert is def on there – prob is our taste in music is polar opposite. I’d loooove to go to see the B Eyed Peas.

  559. TT (AKA Tantalizing Taz) says:

    NYC SB – LMFAO – I needed that!

  560. NYC SB says:

    DC – it was such a GREAT concert … you would have loved it… if they have one in DC I would strongly suggest you go… as for the “whore from NYC” comment… I kindly requested that she calls me the “pretty whore from NYC”

  561. DC says:

    PS David Guetta and LMFAO?
    I am jealous. Very. No fair *pout*

  562. DC says:

    Hahaha NYSE has introduced me to his “baby mama” and daughter, his coworkers… His baby mama affectionately calls me “that whore from NYC” – NYC, that made me crack up. I’m glad you find it as funny as I do.

  563. NYC SB says:

    ok… i turned into Lily… blogville forgive my long posts

  564. NYC SB says:

    which brings me to a recap of last nights date… which was AMAZINGGGG

    NYC SD took me to the Black Eyed Peas concert… we grabbed some food and drinks (well he had the food I had some drinks) before hand… then we went to the concert and had amazing seats… LMAFO opened with Ludacris and David Guetta… all of which are my favorites… we danced the whole time… He helped me with my camera and in exchange for his services I surprised him with a beer… to which he said “you are too good to me” … best moment was when during intermission a red hot chilli pepers song comes on and we both belt out singing… we make a good singing team… sigh… after the concert we went to the after party… he got a bottle… which i made him drink because after couple of beers I started feeling it (due to not having anything to eat for the past 3 days… and then he kidnapped me to his place… no i didnt bring a change of clothes so im in the same clothes as yesterday… kinda gross but totally worth it

    <3 him!

  565. NYC SB says:

    Ok I will answer the questions… havent done that in FOREVER

    When do you find time for sugar?

    Having 2 SDs can be tricky… however, having one not living close by makes things easier. NYC SD and I hang out on average 1 per week… he is busy, I am busy and sometimes we get busy together 😉

    NYSE and I usually do weekends… well this arrangement is still unfolding after our hiatus cuz he was being a punk… So we hung out Vday weekend and this weekend I am going to see him…

    What I love about sugar is that I am no ones main course… just a healthy dose of sugary dessert… I am lucky to have found two self sufficient men who do not get upset if I am not in contact 24/7 … actually NYC SD last night said “I love that we have our space and you let me work. I cant stand when girls get too clingy. You let me do what I need to do without being all over me. Only a confident girl can do that.” My reply was “Or a very busy one”

    How does the sugar melt with the rest of your life?

    Well… NYC SD has introduced me to his friends… he will meet mine next weekend… we are both single and this arrangement feels very much like traditional dating.

    NYSE has introduced me to his “baby mama” and daughter, his coworkers… His baby mama affectionately calls me “that whore from NYC” … no it doesnt bother me… actually its pretty funny. He has met my sugar blog friends and some of my guy friends.

    Its funny because I want to show them off because both are such great men… its supposed to be the other way around… I AM the ARM CANDY in this arrangement LOL

    Has a sugar daddy or sugar baby taken some of you stress away lately? Care to share?

    Both of them help me out tremendously… NYSE is helping with my trading… we trade together whenever I am free and its amazing… of course he also provides me with an allowance… so that takes care of savings/bills. NYC SD pays for all my bills (on his credit card) because he is uncomfortable with the money exchange… fine by me! I hate paying bills lol… He also provides me with amazing dates and has exposed me to some awesome restaurants… Every morning when I wake up I feel very blessed… I hope they both stay in my life for a long time

  566. DC says:

    When do you find time for sugar?
    Pretty much most of my free time as my SD & I are in a sugar-coated, but regular BF/GF relationship.

  567. Jade says:

    Im first !