7 years ago
Fending Off the “Bad Apple” Sugar Daddies?


Lately with the increasing amount of national and international media coverage we have received, I have been getting large numbers of messages on my Facebook account.  Girls from all over the world are writing to ask me to help them find a good “Sugar Daddy” or a good “man”.  Naturally, I respond by telling them I am not a Millionaire Matchmaker, but rather an online dating entrepreneur.  I then proceed to encourage them to join one of my many websites:  SeekingArrangement.com, SeekingMillionaire.com, and WhatsYourPrice.com.

In response to my online dating sales pitch, these females countered with resistance by telling me they are hesitant to join my dating websites (or any other dating websites for that matter) because they have met some bad apples in the past, namely Sugar Daddies who do not exhibit “real” Sugar Daddy qualities.

So, what exactly do I mean by these non-Sugar-Daddy-like qualities?  Most of the seasoned Sugar Babies are probably well familiar with what these bad apple Sugar Daddies are like.  They include the fake Sugar Daddy who claim to be generous by making all sorts of promises he does not plan to keep in order to get into the pants of a potential Sugar Baby, or the Sugar Daddy who loves to send out sexually explicit emails with his “indecent proposals” that may sometimes make you want to puke in disgust.  Then, there is the Sugar Daddy who can’t help but to be rude and abusive in his messages because he thinks just because he has money he therefore has the right to go on some power trip. Let’s not forget about the Stalker Daddy who does not understand that no means no.  The list of bad apples does go on and on, and may therefore seem extremely discouraging to some.  (Note:  Bad apples to cut both ways, so while this blog post is about the “Bad Apple Daddy”, it is important for me to state that there are also “Bad Apple Babies”.)

So what’s my response to the “bad apple” excuse for not joining SeekingArrangement.com?

I remind these Sugar Babies that there are always bad apples among the good apples.  But don’t ever let the bad apples discourage you from finding the good apples.  Bad apples are usually easily within reach, since they’re on the ground having fallen off the apple tree.  The best apples are usually high up in the branches, which means you need to climb up to pick them. Getting a good apple does require hard work.  For this reason it is important to be patient and persistent, and also to learn how to say NO to the bad apples.

There are always bad apple Sugar Daddies around, and SeekingArrangement.com is no exception.  However, we try our very best at SeekingArrangement.com to set our website apart from the hundreds of other Sugar Daddy websites out there by setting a higher standard for what being a Sugar Daddy means.  Just because a person has the monetary means does not make him a Sugar Daddy.  A real Sugar Daddy is generous, a gentleman, always respectful and always seeks to empower others.

In that light, I made the decision a long time ago that SeekingArrangement.com should only attract the best types of members.  While many of our competitors advertise on adult websites, porn sites, and even on escort websites in their quest to attract more Sugar Daddy members, I have refused to follow their examples.  Even though getting traffic from such adult websites may be more profitable for a sugar daddy dating website, it also attracts more bad apple Sugar Daddies whose primary motivation for joining the site is to satisfy their sexual desires.

How to Fend Off the Bad Apples?

So, while I am working hard to attract as many Good Apples to our community, I believe the best protection against any Bad Apple experience is to practice safe dating techniques:

(1) If a Sugar Daddy or Sugar Baby member is rude or disrespectful towards you, BLOCK him or her from being able to contact you.  Stop feeling bad about what he or she may have said. Instead, spend your time looking for the Good Apples you’re meant to meet.  If that member has violated the terms of use of the website, please report him or her to us.

(2)  Trust should always be earned, not given up front.  So, use common sense to protect yourself at all times.   To avoid ending up with a Stalker, give out your Google Voice number instead of your real phone number.  Always meet at a public place and find your own transportation there and back.  The last thing you want is to be stranded without a way to get home.

(3)  Rely on your gut feeling.  If a member is asking you questions that are making you feel uncomfortable, it may be time to move on.  It is never smart to take the risk and put yourself in a dangerous situation.

(4)  Finally, don’t be afraid of saying “NO”.  And always remember that “NO” means “NO”.

When I was a young boy, I had a brown Australian poodle who would not stop humping on the legs of anyone who visited our family.  As innocent as his act may have been, the fact remains that a poodle will always be a poodle… so can you really blame him for behaving the way he was born to behave?

Men are like dogs

I am sure many of you must have heard of the saying that “all men are dogs”.  As a man myself, I know this saying holds a lot of truth.  However, while all men may be dogs, not all men behave like wild dogs.  I guess that’s the difference between a good dog and a bad dog, and that’s also the difference between a good apple and a bad apple sugar daddy.

And, to all of you Sugar Daddies and Sugar Babies who are Good Apples.  Thank you for setting a good example for all of us to follow, and thank you for making our Sugar Community a much better place to be.

Have you met a bad apple Sugar Daddy or Sugar Baby on the website?

Has the experience discouraged you in any way?

Do you have any suggestions on how to deal with such bad apple Sugar Daddies or Babies? 

Leave a Reply

956 Responses to “Fending Off the “Bad Apple” Sugar Daddies?”

  1. Do you mind if I quote a few of your articles as long as I provide
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  2. Joseph says:

    I had a bad experience and I’m an SD. I met a pretty, young woman, she texted me after saying she had a really good time then said she was interested in setting up an arrangement. I said yes also, we worked out the details and then she told me when she was free. I said okay, she said she’d be free that day so I texted her back and suddenly she had to do homework. Okay that’s legit I guess so I texted her the next day and she was very nice and conversational. Then I asked when she’d be free, no reply. I texted again a few hours later, no reply. Eventually I just told her that I need good communication if this is going to work. Of course no reply, and the next day when I checked the site I was blocked. Sorry but that’s just batshit crazy. There’s got to be a way we can rate communication or reliability for other SDs so we don’t all waste our time and money on people who don’t follow through and block for no apparent reason.

  3. Need more protection says:

    I wish that when you block someone, they are blocked from seeing your profile, in addition to not being able to message you. I don’t like the idea of someone I blocked to be able to still look at my public pictures of my face and review my profile details

    • Anonymous says:

      Don’t be naive. It takes about 2 minutes to create another account. It’s better to keep them where you can see them than to have them creeping around like a ninja

    • Anonymous says:

      Just ignore them. When it comes to matters of heart, the opposite of “love” is not “hate” or “I hate you!” (which is what block is) but “indifference.”

    • Privacy Matters says:

      I definitely agree. It’s not good enough to be blocked from messaging. I really don’t want some users to continue to have access to my profile or even know that I blocked them. It doesn’t make sense to still give them access to me. I rather be invisible to that user as if I deactivated from their point of view.

    • JdStar says:

      How can you block them? I knew how to but I forgot

  4. shannon says:

    This was my first time posting in the blog so maybe I will do that :)

  5. DorkyGuy says:

    @shannon~ holy cow! I have never heard a story like that! truly psycho!

    Most of the blog members are now commenting on the new blog topic, so I don’t know how much much response you will get on this one. I suggest posting a comment in the “Polling the Sugar Daddy & Sugar Baby” blog so that the regulars will see it.

  6. shannon says:

    I’ve met two really great SD’s who are both really great friends and one that was absolutely terrible. It is hard to weed out the bad ones when people can be so shady. This man lead me to believe he was a caring, respectful, gentlemen who was obviously very successful. I had full trust in him and thought we had developed a good friendship and romance until he decided to film us “hooking up” with a secret cam and took my cell phone while i was sleeping and copied all my phone contacts and threatened to send the videos to all of them! He sent a still shot to my email so I would see they were real… i was mortified.. thank god he never sent them cuz i threatened to press charges and by the time we ended the arrangement I found out he had pretty much lied about his whole life.. and he confessed to me he did the same thing to the girl he was with before.. all cuz he was jealous and expected a real relationship resulting in marriage but you cant go into an arrangement expecting that.

  7. Anon sb says:

    I wish this site would actually remove sugar daddy’s when someone reports them. I reported a guy Dubai shopper because he expected me to essentially be an escort and when I refused to have sex with him he got violent and threatened me

  8. Dennis Ken says:

    I just signed in here in this dating site. Although in my mind I am money-driven when signing up, I was astonished as to the fact that there are more to sugar relationships than money.
    I have had a lot of bad apple experiences, but I guess that is what makes us more sensitive and stronger as to declining offers of future bad apples.
    I hope that my experience here would be as great to share with as the response of individuals in this post.. Please be safe everyone and I wish you all a beautiful day!

  9. Harlequin says:

    Have you met a bad apple Sugar Daddy or Sugar Baby on the website?
    My very first Sugar experience turned out to be very bad indeed, and it honestly scared the snot out of me to try again, but I did. I had met one or two that I had considered potentials, but they all tended to be a p4p, making a lot of promises without ever following through. Then the ones that said they were experienced, yet when it came to making arrangements for me to go to them they would give me a budget that wouldn’t even cover airfare for one way and even had one ask me what could I put in for me to come out to him.

    I haven’t given up completely, and have been in contact with a few other potential sugars and will be meeting them soon.

    Has the experience discouraged you in any way?

    It didn’t just discourage me, but it terrified me from the first experience. But then I remembered there are always going to be bad apples, and that from then forth I would be more careful from then on.

    Do you have any suggestions on how to deal with such bad apple Sugar Daddies or Babies?

    Honestly, watch for the red flags, if they wont give you a number to contact them at, if they request you cover part of the travel costs, or for you to pay for the first date. Remember the first meeting/date is so that you both can see if you are a good fit for each other. Don’t let the sugar daddy or the baby push you into a situation that you are not uncomfortable. Also just like any blind date, always have a cellphone on you have a means to contact someone in case of emergency. Set up a contact situation, if they don’t hear from you in a specific amount of town, for them to be able to contact someone with where you are supposed to be at. Same goes for the Sugar Daddy’s and Mama’s. Protection is important and always make sure that the locations are public.

  10. ScottyNoCal says:

    SD here who has been happily been with the same woman for over a year now. I just started to read this blog and it’s awesome! You all might see me on here more in the future. Cheers!

  11. Ava says:

    I’m so Glad I read your article. A Google voice number seems like a perfect solution.
    Still looking for my good apple.
    Have a great day!

  12. Jas says:

    A lovely Sunday morning to every one,

    A quick question,if an SD doesn’t compliements the pictures that you have already sent him or he has seen on the profile,yet keep on asking for more,and mind you he hasn’t sent even one of his,nor does he have any on the site,so should you just sign him off or give him a chance to get to know him ? Please guys/gals I’d appreciate your take on the matter. Thanks !

  13. Jas says:

    I don’t get,why there are so many SDs or pretentd to be one when they have not a clue about this whole SD/SB thing ? I too,am getting frustrated and feeling discouraged. I don’t know what to do ? I am an attractive woman ( so I am told ) smart,funny,educated all that,yet can’t seem to attract the right one.Could some one help me please ? Any advice,tips would be much appreciated.

  14. Ricky says:

    Ladies, if you are having mostly bad experiences with the gentlemen on this site, I suggest you edit your profiles to better reflect what you are looking for. Sadly, most of the girls on this site portray themselves with their photos and choice of words as less flattery then they might imagine. Surely we are all searching for a gentlemen who is caring, considerate and trustworthy, therefore we should also be.

    The only issue I have personally experienced is receiving a catalog of nudes (gross) and a couple flakes. In the months I’ve been on this site I have only traveled and met one man, though I’ve corresponded with dozens. Be selective ladies, don’t waste your time or compromise your values.

    For the gentlemen who felt the need to speak up about not compensating us gals for our time upon meeting.. Shame on you. Be aware of the nature of the sight you signed up for. Certainly no fellas should be used as an ATM machine, however be aware of the hours and preparation it takes to get to the point where we feel comfortable to meet for a date, and look like a bombshell across the table for dinner. I can only speak for myself, but had I 100% interest in a guy durring the date, only to not be shown consideration for my time afterward (even as an offering of respect if we didn’t ‘click’) I would call my girlfriend and contemplate wether you were not interested, or just a cheap ‘SD’. Any classy SB would relate and agree. We are on this site to interact with high caliber gentlemen, and in my life experiences real ‘gentlemen’ know how to act the part. If this comes as news to anyone, rather then disagree (lots of you wealthy men just love to debate;) perhaps you should take note. In this type of arrangement generosity is key and NEVER forgotten, so be a doll and take the lead.

    And for the girls who have had issues with guys like this in the past, potentially wasting your time.. Communication is essential. Make sure you discuss the details of any arrangement beforehand, and ask if you will be taken care of for your time. The answer to that question will speak volumes about your potential SD.

  15. lynnie says:

    I’m very new to this, but what I have experienced is almost ALL bad apples with one exception.

    For the most part, it seems the majority of these men are looking for a quick exchange of cash and sex. I suppose this type of dating site is a great outlet for that if that’s what they’re into. People will manipulate anything to work to their benefit, so although I don’t agree with it, I can see why they do it.

    The thing is, they make it harder for the real SBs in that we have to be a little more guarded. Even if we have a good head on our shoulders, good business men are smart and know how to get what they’re after.

    Then there are the guys who are looking for marriage and get upset that you won’t pledge your life to them after only getting to know them for a very short time.

    I met one that was groping at me while we ate, which I find very disrespectful. There was another that just looked like he was mesmerized looking into my eyes and just nodded his head when I spoke like he had zero interest in what I was saying. One that was so creepy he kept asking me if he could touch my breasts a few minutes after sitting down for coffee.

    Meeting someone who is a legitimate SD and a respectful gentleman has been quite refreshing. I hope there are more like him on this site.

    Like I said, I don’t blame those men…I’m sure they had met women on this site prior to me that allowed their behavior or even encouraged it.

    There should be mutual respect and admiration and an understanding of each others wants and needs discussed before anything else comes into play.

    Maybe I’m wrong? Like I said, I”m very new to this!

  16. wizernamore ribeiro says:

    gostoi muito da informaçoes , quero saber como faço pra participar ??

  17. Try posting in the new blog. You may get more responses there

  18. Jenniferbabe says:

    By the way, to clarify my earlier post, at the point when he was asking for more pictures was only after very inital introductions and how are you type exchanges, no talk at that point about what either of us expect from an arrangement. And BOOM the initially polite request for pics, the complete and utter unappreciative response to them and claims of blurriness (untrue, they were very clear and even a clear and perfect close-up of my pretty face blowing him a kiss! Lol), then the pushy and rude demand for more pics that are more clear and preferably bikini or lingerie clad. What the heck? This keeps happening to me, what can I do? Or are all the potential sugardaddies that I begin communicating with creepers living in their parents basement collecting risqué pictures of unsuspecting sugarbabies?!! Thankfully I’m smart enough not to fall for it and I even politely ask them to respect the fact that I’m not sending pics like that, that I would like to find a true gentleman sugardaddy (which btw is soooo sexy), and that I’m not feeling likE a princess so far! They usually change their tune and start to act more like a gentleman however by then, I’m over it and have lost any interest in them. Is everyone a fake and a jerk or should I keep trying? Thanks for helping xo <3

  19. Jenniferbabe says:

    I’m having alot of trouble with the potential SD asking for pictures of me in their first email – even though I have a picture on my profile. I understand this and since they seem nice and I want to get to know them better, I went ahead and sent a few cute pictures of myself. Even though I know I’m very attractive and that the pictures were really cute, he responds to them without any compliments or acknowledgment at all that the he liked the pictures….only a pushy “they were very blurry” and please send more, bikini or lingerie shots. I politely kind of ignore this rude response and am my charming self in the next email, complimenting him on his pics (even though he’s not that great…lol). He responds again with unappreciative, and pushy request that I take pics today and email them to him, making sure they are bikini shots, and again dismissing my 5 previous and really cute pics as “blurry”. Wow, what a jerk. This was one of our first 2 or 3 emails….why should I provide him with detailed, bikini-clad, or whatever he is demanding. He acted entitled to these kinds of pics just for the mere fact that he and I started emailing. I figure if I have to send him an email about what it means to be a gentleman and make a girl feel like a princess then he’s obviously bad news & I can delete him. How do I go about getting the respect that I deserve and find a true sugar daddy who is a true gentleman above all else? Help!!!

    • Guest says:

      Think of yourself as a precious jewel which is so rare it inspires the desire of man to possess it in the materialistic sense but also invokes the higher self in admiration of it’s beauty. The jewel is multifaceted, so must you be. x love you sister.

  20. bella says:

    Sugar daddie :). Yumm

  21. Anon girl says:

    I love your site, but have had nothing but problems.

    I met one man who came up from London. I’d booked a good country hotel near where I live, and he texted me to say he was on the train but had left his credit card by accident. I said it was ok, I had a cc in my maiden name still. I am still paying off the £350 bill he left me with.

    I met another guy who wouldn’t let me look at a lunch menu and ordered us salmon sarnies. He also didn’t know what a caper berry was. He said he had a room, and we went to it. He hurt me so much physically, I didn’t allow him to penetrate, He then said that the cash he had he’d put in a different jacket. So I went back home bleeding by his attack and very sorry that I’d trusted to turn up.

    I hope there are real gentlemen on your site. I only joined to build up some cash for me to move on with and hopefully to meet nice guys.

  22. LVbutterfly says:

    thanks will do!

  23. Tina says:

    LVbutterfly: there is a new blog topic, so you might want to repost there, since not many will be checking this one.

  24. LVbutterfly says:

    Also…what pisses me off is that I always get my hair done, etc especially for a first meeting so going through all that trouble only for him to flake on me at the last minute with that fake story really irks me. I know it comes with the territory but we had been talking and came to this “agreement” over the last month…he was going on and on about how excited he was to finally meet me…so why do they do that? Most of the time if they flake they don’t go to all that trouble and will just not call or show up…so what gives with this one? I finally told him to save the antics and I would just blog about him. 😉 He’s married so hopefully he will just leave the site. I’ll be checking on him. Also he e-mailed me pics of himself so I just don’t get it. Thankfully I didn’t send him any extra pics.

  25. LVbutterfly says:

    okay….I had an SD flake on me yesterday and today. I live in Las Vegas so its not surprising but what is a pain in the a$$ is that we have been talking and e-mailing back and forth for over a month. He gets here and gee, the airport “lost his luggage” and he had all of his “cash” packed with it. First of all, who packs their cash and doesn’t carry it on them when traveling? Now mind you we talked on the phone the day before he flew in and we had already come to an “arrangement” of what the visit would entail, how much, etc. So today he tells me they found his luggage but lo and behold his “cash” was “gone” as in “stolen” from his luggage….so I know there are a lot of fakes out there but why go thru all the antics when he obviously never meant to meet me to begin with? and can and how do I report a guy like this? He is a total scammer. I’m fairly new at this, but I’m no flake and this guy is definitely a “bad apple”! Any advice? Thank you.

  26. redheadSB says:


    I can assure you that us younger girls can be very open to sexual exploration…I just don’t want to meet my SD for the first time at his hotel where we stop the elevator in between floors and he cuts off the circulation to my breasts with a phone charger while asking me to lick his nipples while he tucks his junk in between his legs and rubs a quick one out from behind himself. Ugh. I’m NOT a swinger, I’m NOT going to use you as a human toilet, and I like oral all around as long as you make me feel intimately comfortable.

    Yes a lot of younger girls blanch at oral, doggy, or other very normal sexual activities…but a lot of us don’t too. Maybe it’s because some of us are mature for our age….I know some men like older women because they are more experienced and comfortable in their body…but I think it just depends more on the woman. My main objective IS to make my SD happy overall anyways right? :-)

  27. Tina says:

    @southern_sd: first, congrats on getting rid of the “boo” part of your name 😉 And, just to let you know, since there’s another blog topic the conversation has moved to there :) I’m happy that you’re giving it another go, and taking it at both of your speeds! I know that some SDs have multiple SBs to fit what they need at the time – some have local for during the week arrangements, and also have out of town for traveling/vacation arrangements, etc. It just depends on what you’re both looking for and what “clicks” for both of you.

  28. southern_sd says:

    @Georgina, I just wanted to say as a SD I agree. My current SB (who knows how much longer this it will last) we txted/emailed for weeks before meeting. She is a long distance SB so we only planned on meeting and then spending a full weekend a month together.

    On our first meeting dinner, a drink, live music, walked through a historic district and she did come back to my room. I had no intention of trying anything we talked about silly stuff, watched videos, etc when it was getting late I decided it was time to call it a night.

    Besides holding hands, two kisses goodbye, that was it. I did give her a card in a envelope which said how “Excited I was we finally were able to meet etc” and the card had a gift card and $200 in it.

    Like usual we get along great, got along great that night, she texted me withing 10 min. “You are the most awesome guy ever!! Thank you Thank you I can’t wait to hang out again!!”

    We are meeting for our second weekend together next week hopefully I can get past this stigma I seem to be having with younger SB’s.

  29. Cougar K.C. says:

    Thanks to everyone for your helpful comments. Although my first experience sucked, I’m going to keep thinking positively and find my perfect SD match. If a weird situation comes up again I’ll leave right away, I won’t sit through another encounter of some old icky guy trying to make me do things I wouldn’t do for any amount of money.

  30. SDinLA says:

    New blog topic

  31. Tina says:

    @BeautifullySweet: just be patient, and, not to steal a line (sorry Prince Charming), you might have to kiss a few frogs…….just be careful so that you can keep yourself protected while you search, and everything will work out in time.

  32. BeautifullySweeetSB says:


    I’ve never looked at it that way. That’s a good point though. I guess it’s just me having to go through the screening process. He’s not just going to appear over night and i need to realize that.

  33. Tina says:

    @Dorky: I’m a little jealous, my results were SOOOOO boring! But, a little too accurate if you know where to look……EEEP!

  34. @Dorky Guy you too… I thought I was skitzo for awhile…. lol

  35. DorkyGuy says:

    @Michael~ LOL… Thanks a lot for that dirtsearch.org site.

    I did a search on myself, and I found 9 results in the “Federal Prison Inmate Lookup”. Good god, how did they figure that out? Two of them have my *exact* name… First/Middle/Last/Suffix

    A search of my name at my county courthouse reveals a long history of writing bad checks.

    I never knew I was so badass! A couple of tattoos and some spikes, and I won’t be able to keep the chicks off of me.

  36. Tina says:

    @BeautifullySweetSB: I don’t think that age has anything to do with it; I’ve met men in their 20s that were perfect gentlemen with old souls, and 40 year olds that still act like they’re 18. It’s the same with women – I don’t think SDs should discount the younger SBs because they’ve met a few immature ones, and also shouldn’t discount the older SBs since they have met a few fuddy duddys. Personally, I think I’m more fun the age that I’m at than I was in my 20s, and feel I have much more to offer. To me, age is just a number, and it all depends on chemistry.

  37. BeautifullySweeetSB says:

    @VA Gentleman: I’m sure that’s where we went wrong we didn’t really discuss general expectations. I was thinking that you talk about that after you decided that you two are compatible. I do recall discussing the whole sugar thing but we discussed that sugar would be received once we decide if we have chemistry. I told him that i’m ok with giving sugar but not to a complete stranger. He expected me to trust him immediately which is a bit dangerous to me. You don’t just get trust immediately you earn it and that goes for me as well. I felt as though he should have wanted to get to know that he has a real SB that deserves respect and that we could build trust together. When I think of a SD i think of a thoughtful gentleman who is also generous but respectful at the same time. As a SB i’m suppose to be the missing link of his busy life rather it be affection and love, sex, or just someone to spend time with them when they have it. Do you think his age may have played a big role? He’s 37. Maybe i should look for an older gentleman.

  38. PrinceCharming says:


    Wow, great comeback! The issue with asking about a budget is it’s really saying she’s asking for as much as she can get, rather than how much she needs. My take has been to try and make things needs-based (within limits, which may be higher or lower.)


    I wasn’t trolling for SBs in the blog, though the response was nice. Everyone who replied based on the blog is out of state for me which complicates things greatly. I will say that the women who read and write on this blog are definitely several cuts above what I’ve been interacting with locally, likely because y’all are literate and funny.

  39. Tina says:

    @Dorky: I don’t think it’s a bad thing to discuss the arrangement, I think it’s all about how and when it is brought up. I think it’s very inappropriate for a SB to just blurt out “so, what’s your budget?” during a meeting when things are going well. But, I DO believe that it is completely appropriate to discuss it once the SD has mentioned he’s interested in an arrangement; and instead of asking what his budget is, I think it’s a little bit easier to phrase it something like “what kind of arrangement are you thinking of? I’m wondering how many meetings / week you were expecting, and if you were planning on financial gifts or trips / material gifts”

  40. babydoll says:

    @SdGuru~sorry i didnt know that!!! lol and thank you :)))

    @dorky~ haha!! thank you a million :))) i hope i didnt give you hives haha 😉

  41. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars, Welcome to the Newbies 😀

    PrinceCharming~ You told her you knew her from her work? Yeah, she might be a little freaked out, it might be the way you said it… I know email and such doesn’t really convey emotions and is sometimes taken the wrong way… who knows.

    I wonder how many SBs would present their old SDs to other SBs? Has anyone here done that?
    To me, what I have seen, is that most SBs don’t want that, jealousy or other reasons..I have done that but with a pot SD that didn’t click for me , but did for both of them…

    @Frank~ I don’t know what to say, I know I have been sick and needed surgery once but I never asked or wanted my SD at the time to pay for anything. But it is different here, He actually got mad at me for being sick and said that he wasn’t going to wait, my healing time, and left. I understand that point, but for you to pay? That isn’t really part of the Sugar, if she really is sick, that really isn’t fun, you could do as the other Gents here suggested and leave, be friendly maybe.. There is no easy way to end it when someone is sick… if it is in fact true that she is!

    Dorky~ “my budget is determined by how generous you make me feel” that is great. but some SBs like to have a number, most have one I think… I may be wrong

    VA~ Great advice.

    NM AM~ Hey girl, get better soon.

  42. DorkyGuy says:

    Is it such a bad thing for them to know your budget? Think of it this way:

    “This is the amount that I have available to spend for my sugar dating. I leave the option to you… We can either do modest activities, allowing for a higher allowance, or have more extravagant gifts and activities, with a lower allowance”.

    It lets her manage her own expectations. I dunno… doesn’t seem like a bad approach.

  43. babydoll says:


    @frank~sorry to hear about your Sb,i hope she will find a solution to her problem financially,but its really good of you to extend help the best way you can.i know a lot would think its wrong,but there are genuinely a lot of people who really dont have anyone to go for help.she maybe one of them.but ofcourse,you have a family to look after and you have your life to live as well.
    but also you are the only one who knows your capacity and it is not wrong to move on is you feel the need to from this arrangement.after all,you are not a husband to her.

    good luck!!

  44. PhoneGuy says:

    @bill and Dorky, I’ve been asked that a few times.

  45. Va Gentleman says:

    @Beautifully Sweeet SB

    ” So the Pot I had my first meet with yesterday has suddenly changed his mind about being my Pot SD ”

    There are a couple of things that bother me about your interaction with the Pot . Primarily they center around communication . If you talked/texted for a couple of weeks did you not discuss general ideas about expectations ? You said there was no discussion about about money or arrangements –and I presume none about sex . He obviously planned to have sex as soon as possible and wanted to PTP . When he was rebuffed he acted like a jerk and certainly did not endear himself to you . You wanted to get to know him and evolve into an arrangement at you pace.

    So the weekend blew up because of differing expectations and lack of communicating those expectations to each other .

    Next time you are talking to a Pot about an upcoming meet ask him what his expectations are for that meet. At the same time tell him clearly what your expectations and limits are. Text or email them in fact so that there will be a little reminder for you both if the meet is promising .

    I’ll give you an example that others here already have heard but it is worth your hearing . My SB and I have been together for close to a year . We communicated on and off the site for 2 weeks and talked on the phone several days before we had planned to meet . I told her I would expect to stay together for the night and she told me what her expected allowance would be . We made no long term plans other than to see how we liked each other and go from there . She wanted a regular meet 2 days/week as I did . We met and loved being with each other and the arrangement was born .

    The bottom line is amost always : you want a nice guy to give you an allowance and have a good time along the way . He wants a beautiful girl to spoil and have sex with. The faster you get to those two goals the sooner your needs will be met .

  46. DorkyGuy says:

    @bill~ suggested reply: “my budget is determined by how generous you make me feel”

  47. bill says:

    When a SB asks me what my budget is thats the end.

  48. MidwestAnna says:

    @ Frank – She may not be faking, but the two of you haven’t known each other long enough for you to take on those kinds of problems. She may be a terrific girl, but if she really is struggling with those issues, it could be a bottomless pit.

    I disagree with the person who commented that an SBs problems should never become the SDs. These situations are supposed to be fun and easy for both parties and a certain amount of reservation needs to be in place to achieve that, however, it is inevitable that when two people spend a lot of time together, they will develop a friendship and begin to care about each others well being.

    @ Cougar – That is horrible. An experience like that would definitely sour me, but fortunately nothing of that sort has ever happened. There was one guy who I met for coffee, a respected professional whose identity and story I was able to verify using the few details he provided. I felt very comfortable about meeting him. He did attempt to get me to come home with him and said he wanted a “test drive” before discussing an arrangement. Normally, I would have been insulted, but he was clearly a rookie with no concept of etiquette and no idea what he was looking for. I wasn’t attracted to him and therefor not interested, but I sent him a polite email explaining how to handle situations going forward without insulting the ladies he meets. He was receptive.

    RE: The PrinceCharming stuff…. I’m bowing out! I too want to see how things play out and whether he ends up with any of the ladies who threw their hats in the ring.

  49. @Michael alleycat- holly smokes. I just did dirt search and like 250 people were listed with the same last name as mine. I don’t think I would appreciate anyone trying to search me using that site knowing that i have an extremely common first/last name.

  50. BeautifullySweeetSB says:

    Hey guys! So the Pot I had my first meet with yesterday has suddenly changed his mind about being my Pot SD which is fine with me but I just feel like he was moving too fast. First of all we had only been talking for little while and we emailed back and fourth and I had just given him my number yesterday just in case something came up and he needed to call, everything was cool but he kept giving off this sexual aura I kind of brushed it off and we decided to meet. He said he would be in my city this weekend and wanted to meet and since i’m a freshly new SB i go by the rules that i learned on this site and allowed him to come to my turf instead of me traveling to him. We decided to meet at Starbucks but when he got to my city he told me he was checking into his hotel and he told me where it was. Right then and there I was thinking I hope he’s not expecting me to come to his room with him, so I text him and told him that I wasn’t going back to his room with him and that the whole point of us meeting at Starbucks was to see if we could possibly have any chemistry. And he text me back and said that that wasn’t what we discussed and that maybe i have a misconception of a sb/sd relationship. I told him that i wasn’t confused and that i know exactly what a Sd/Sb relationship is. I’m young but i’m very intelligent and i don’t ever recall us discussing me going back to his room and we def did not discuss making any arrangements or discussing any money. As a new SB i was being very cautious and it would have been illogical for me to go to a hotel with a man i don’t know. Then he made this stupid comment and said I didn’t bring $300 dollars just to have coffee. I was thinking what the hell does he think I am?! I text him back and said I am NOT an escort I’m a SB and i’m not sleeping with you on our first meet. He basically wished me luck on my search and he said since he was in my city for the weekend would i at least have dinner with him. I agreed and it was actually pretty great he seemed like a really nice guy and we had good conversation. At the end of our date he asks me if I wanted to make an arrangement with him. I’m thinking maybe since he’s met me and seen i’m not that type of Baby that will sleep with him on the first date he’ll approach me as more of a gentleman. Clearly not the case. After I left from meeting him he attempted again to get me to sleep with him and i told him no. So this morning he asked me if I wanted to hook up with him today. I told him i would like to hang out with him because he has a really nice conversation but i’m not going to sleep with him. So he said “well good luck in ur search…its 2 bad ur a sweet, adorable girl”. As of right now i’m just like he’s a little Drama King who didn’t want to earn his sugar he wanted it right then and there. He basically showed me what type of SD i’m not looking for. I told him to have a great day and that was the end of my texting him. He text me back and asked since tonight is his last night here would I like to have dinner with him. I’m not going to reply because I feel like he’s just going to try me again and I’m not wasting anymore of my time with him. Am i discouraged? Not really because I know there are good SD’s out there searching for a wonderful SB and I’m willing to wait for him.

  51. Va Gentleman says:

    @ Frank

    Sorry for your tribulations –and for hers if they are real .

    I 5th the motion to run and don’t look back . Since she will still see your profile active on the site (I presume ) just tell her you decided that the relationship won’t work for you and you wish her a happy life ,yadayada . If she knows who you are it’s too late to worry about being outed if she is that kind of person anyway so just end it and be firm . There is no easy way .

  52. NC Gent says:

    Frank — repeat after me… enough times until you believe it…. “Your SB’s problems should never become yours.” That isn’t what sugar dating is all about. Just say you thought it over and you aren’t comfortable spending your limited resources in that manner. Best wishes and I am sorry you are in this position. Another way to think of it, she wouldn’t be willing to have sex (sans sugar) with you just because you hadn’t had any in a while, right? Your problem, not hers, right?

  53. Michael Alleycat says:

    @Frank –

    Firstly – she is scamming you. Started off with lunch, then little emergencies like car and computer breakdown, now she is going for the big one. It’s a classic scam – grooming you by starting off small, now growing after she has made sure you like her and have become emotionally involved.

    Secondly, do a check on her name using dirtsearch.org, it’s free. I bet you will find something.

    Thirdly, run. Quickly. Now.

    Fourth, end it gently. She may come after you, try and talk to your wife etc. Does she know your real name, address etc?

    Just my $0.02

  54. frank says:

    Thanks for all the great advice so far. I don’t think she is faking illness, although that has certainly crossed my mine, even to the point of asking for the names of the medicines she has taken. Of course, she never got around to giving them to me. Guess I’ll know for sure when she shows up with a big wound where her liver used to be!

    Of course the other problem is that she is living on the edge, trying to work part time and go to school, kids father not paying child support, parents and siblings dead. I know its a sad story. Hard to cut somebody off when you know what its going to do to them. I know what I would do if it were a friend, give emotional support etc, but she is more like an employee. Do I do the Romney treatment and fire her?

    My circumstances are that I have limited income, and took some money from the sale of a car, and set it aside for the sugar life. (you know, midlife crisis and all that) That money is coming to and end soon anyway.

    Any suggestions on how I should end it?

  55. Anna Molly says:

    Thanks SDinLa! The cough meds the DR gave me have helped a lot! WhooHoo! Lol 😀

    Hi everyone! Happy Monday! 😀

  56. PrinceCharming says:


    Woah, that situation is probably not what you were looking for. A big part of going the arrangement route is being able to turn things on and off cleanly, and given that the expectations for your arrangement were relatively modest to begin with, you’re by
    no means obligated to help and I have to agree with the others that it’s probably
    time to end things. I’ve given two of my SBs in the past parting gifts, but I’m a retarded SD
    so I’m probably a bad role model. SD Guru’s rule #4 applies here.


    My SB#2 was my SB 7 years ago, then it became more relationship-ish (SB->SO?). The new pot SB, as far as I can tell, has never been a SB before and just appeared on the site last week and I messaged her, we did a couple rounds and she asked to move it to email, which I did, and she replied using her IRL name/email address (newbie mistake!) Name seemed familiar, I googled that, and it turns out she worked/volunteered at same small organization SB#2 did. Now it gets really funny, I called SB/exSO#2 up and mentioned pot SB’s name to jog her memory, and she was suddenly very jealous — apparently, at an event several years ago that I helped SB#2 at, I met and helped the pot SB. SB#2 recounted every single detail of what I did with pot SB there to me, yet I barely remember anything other than going to said event.

    Anyway I told the pot SB via email that our paths had crossed, and said in a nice way that she may wish to be careful about using her real name too early in the process. That was yesterday AM and I’ve not heard anything since, so I think between knowing who she is and the gentle warning I may have spooked her; it’s only been a day so hopefully I’m wrong about scaring her off. I know if I were a SB I’d be spooked a bit if someone knew me right off the bat — I suppose I could have said nothing and pretended to not know, but I’m not a big fan of deception. Anyway, VERY trippy to find out we’d not only met before but that I’d helped her out on something directly, and finding this all out from a previous SB.

    The SB introducing the next SB is common for me (I guess about 50%) and I’ve had a couple other potential SBs that I wasn’t interested in introduced to me as well. I think the key for that happening is that the SB relationship is over but ended on good terms. I’ve always asked women I’m on good terms with to keep me in mind if they have friends.

    @Cougar KC
    Ugh. That fellow doesn’t sound like a SD at all, more like a “john,” and any woman that did that from the site on a first date isn’t a SB but an escort. Keep trying and screen more. A lot more. Just remember this incident had nothing to do with you, and there’s plenty of creepy people out there IRL too.

  57. @frank- I actually admire you for helping this girl out.I’ve dealt with health issues of my own and I was extremely fortunate to have some outside help when I needed it the most. I’m sure your sb probably feels the same way about the help that you have been providing for her.
    The best thing I could say to you if you do wish to continue the relationship with her is to help out when you can, but don’t make it your top priority. You have a family and that should come before anything. Try to be emotionally supportive of the situation too. If you do choose to stay with her, ask if you can go to the doctors appointments and try doing research on things that she can do to help lower the costs.

  58. DorkyGuy says:

    @frank~ I think I agree with Michael on this one. Assuming her situation is real, you cannot be her knight in shining armor. This is too big for you. Your have more important priorities. It is kinder to cut things now than to become more emotionally attached and do so later. Even if you feel like a heel for walking, nobody… probably not even her… would look at you that way.

  59. Grasshopper says:

    @Tina – I agree! :)

  60. Michael Alleycat says:

    @Frank – having thought about this some more. I think you should walk, unless you have hard evidence. In any case, you should walk anyway.

    This has drama, drama, drama written all over it, and those are 3 things you don’t want in your life.

  61. Tina says:

    @Alleycat: you were quoting the infamous Guru 😉

  62. Michael Alleycat says:

    @Frank – sounds like you are in a tough spot. I have been through the breast cancer thing, and it isn’t funny.

    1. You are married – you said you have to look after your family first, and not her. Correct!
    2. If another non-SB friend of yours was in the same situation, what would you do? Emotional support, maybe a little bit more.
    3. Breast cancer treatment will financially destroy you, if you do not have decent medical insurance.
    4. Is she trying to fleece you? Have you been to doctor appointments with her? Smells a little bit fishy.
    5. To quote someone – forget who said it – “Don’t let her problems become your problems”
    6. Don’t do it – you have an arrangement in place, and it doesn’t include helping her through everything. There should be a clear give-and-take in the arrangement. Don’t go past the boundaries you have set, otherwise it will never end. It sounds like you are doing the white knight thing a bit already through fixing her car etc. Stop.

  63. Tina says:

    @ Grassy: we’d be a killer team!

    @ Dorky: nice to hear….at least you’re not…..nevermind……..my mind is apparently in the gutter! That’s what happens when I have a day off, and have been gardening…….flowers apparently make me naughty! :)

  64. DorkyGuy says:

    @Tina~ Yeah, I am completely kicking ass at work… Carpet bombing my to do list. It is a wonder to behold!

  65. Grasshopper says:

    @Tina – haha…you know me girl, you KNOW me! ;P

  66. Tina says:

    Oh my you naughty little Grasshopper! 😉 (I like it! I like it!)

  67. Grasshopper says:

    @Tina – Re: “The question is Grassy – who is on the other side of the table? *wink wink nudge nudge*”

    Answer: Whoever I deem worthy 😉

  68. Tina says:

    @Dorky: feeling more inspired this morning?

    @Grassy: do I know your fetishes, er what? :)

  69. DorkyGuy says:

    @frank~ Have you considered (I mean really considered) the possibility that she could be faking the illness to fleece you?

    It happens, and after it happens, the victim always swears that they thought the connection was real and totally trusted the person. It could save you a ton of heartache to do some independent research.

  70. Grasshopper says:

    @Tina – Re: ” I checked out your profile out of curiosity, and it looks like you and Grassy might have a great connection Just make sure you have a stiletto allowance in your budget, and I’m sure you’ll be quite happy;)”

    Indeed, Tina…Indeed!…heh 😉

  71. Tina says:

    The question is Grassy – who is on the other side of the table? *wink wink nudge nudge*

  72. Grasshopper says:

    ::drops napkin….AGAIN:: OOPS! *giggles*

  73. Tina says:

    Wow, it seems like everyone on the blog was off tonight. Dorky made a comment about need something to pump him up, and there wasn’t a smart alec / inappropriate comment to be seen. *sigh*

    @Prince Charming: looks like you have built quite a following very quickly. I checked out your profile out of curiosity, and it looks like you and Grassy might have a great connection 😉 Just make sure you have a stiletto allowance in your budget, and I’m sure you’ll be quite happy;)

    @frank: wow, I’m sorry to hear about the health problems your SB is having. Obviously I can’t speak for the SDs, or any other SB for that matter, but for me I wouldn’t expect my SD to pay for medical expenses. This lifestyle isn’t my only source of income, and I can take care of myself without a SD, but I have a few things that help is quite appreciated on :) Actually, since I have a few things up in the air at the moment with work, I haven’t been actively searching at this time. I don’t think it would be fair to any pot SD. With that, I wouldn’t expect any SD to help with my serious medical expenses OR pay for my entire lifestyle, regardless of what happens to me. This type of relationship, again my opinion, means that they don’t have to stick around when things get too hairy or sticky. It’s the nature of the beast to me, and I wouldn’t think any less of a SD if he ended the relationship when I wasn’t able to live up to my end of arrangement. I admire you for looking to see what you can do to help her out – obviously you care about her and have a heart for her situation – but again, if it was me, I wouldn’t expect nor hold anything against you if you ended the arrangement. It would be nice for a former SD to call and check on my situation, and maybe help a little here and there if he wanted / could, but no expectations on my end.

  74. frank says:

    Hey everybody!

    In regards to the background check, being a married SD, that would never happen before the first date, and I would hesitate to give full contact information until I was sure the pot SB was not a flake. That could take several meetings.

    Now to my question. I have been with this SB since November. She lives out of town and I see her over lunch once a week. We never had a set allowance, and the agreement morphed into my giving her money each week, and often in between for “emergencies” (like her car inspection, computer broke down etc.)

    We really like each other. I am an older SD and she is late 30’s SB with a 8 year old kid. The thing is, she had breast cancer before I met her and was recovered, but 2 months ago she started having liver problems, and her medicaid wouldn’t pay the full amount for her prescriptions often to the tune of hundreds of dollars each time, and I of course helped with them. The liver problems were caused by the radiation therapy she endured, and that killed half her kidney, and now they are going to take half of the kidney out and she is faced with weeks of recovery, loss of income from her job. And that is the best outcome she can expect.

    I am conflicted with this. I am not going to be able to afford to pay all of her living expenses, and not even sure if I want to.

    How does sickness play into the NSA concept. I will feel like a heel walking out on her, but I have a family that is my first priority. Any body have a similar experience?

  75. DorkyGuy says:

    I am feeling whimsically lackadaisical tonight. I am trying to get inspired enough to care about work, but I need some thing to pump me up. I think mental work is going to be tough tonight. Somebody hand me a mop, that sounds mindless.

  76. babydoll says:

    @Dorky~ lol!

    @NYG~oh gawd dont make me start where its wrong hahahha (mine) well nt sure how to get Sd’s attention anyway as i am not looking,i think as well i am too spoiled from not waiting around for a long time when i first signed up on another site ,no,i just feel impatient to wait around for anyne else if i was actually looking for a pot.
    but i assume its my profile,i am havent got a pushy,trying hard set up.its basically similar to what i have on my other profile on the other site but on here i put an allowance on my head.
    well i get the occasional email,some were i felt genuine,some were just photo collectors which i never reply to and dont waste any of my time.some never really got to the stage of any ffer t all just emails or P4P. well lets ask Sd Guru for our emails and email you my profile number.
    haha!!! but you have got an Sd at the moment as well do you?

    @SDGuru~would it be ok to send us an exchange email ? please send my email to NYGirl?

    @PrinceCharming~ it made me smile reading your past Sb’s an di am quite sure like any of the others already said here,you wont take long to find another Sb lol
    omg reading it made me laugh at how much you have spent,but you obviously can afford to spend that and i am sure they were worthwhile however the circumstances were.

  77. SDinLA says:

    A handjob in a restaurant on a first meeting? Rank amateurs. I get a hand job after my massage to relax me and THEN I go meet my pot SBs and demand oral sex under the table, THAT’S how a REAL SD does it. Anyone who turns me down is obviously not a real SB.

    Of course it’s hard to do that when Grassy is dropping napkins everywhere.

  78. SDinLA says:

    Good evening/morning all. Hope everyone had a wonderful weekend.

    @Dutch Girl Aw, hope you are feeling better. Spot is in a residential drug rehab program out in Malibu for 30 days getting treated for his catnip addiction. He’s been in a little over a week now and he’s doing better, I spoke to him briefly today. He sends his regards and is still very much looking forward to meeting your bunny.

    @Anna Molly Hope you are feeling better too.

    @MidwestAnna One of the blog moderators and long time posters here (who gave up the blog for Lent) is “Midwest SB.” And you have met “Anna Molly.” So when I first saw “MidwestAnna”, I thought it was some kind of surreal dream where the two of them had merged into one all-powerful, Guru-rivalling SB entity. But it was not so. Welcome. I am the official Blog Jester and Blog Slut Emeritus.

    @NewYorkGirl I am not an active member of this site, and Guru’s profile number is so secret even Obama can’t get access to it.

    @Grassy, You changed your avatar! Nice. I added one but I don’t think it’s shown up yet

    @Dorky, The wet floor here is usually from your lubricated loins, why are you blaming the SBs?

  79. Beach_Girl says:

    @Dorky~ lol Slid into the blog hahhahah 😀

  80. Beach_Girl says:

    Cougar K.C.~ You should of left him there… Really a Hand job? WTF??? I am sorry that happened to you, but never stay if you are not comfortable …Leave, give an excuse or what ever..
    That is why I usually do a coffee date for a first meet, maybe a lunch… but If I wasn’t comfortable, I would tell him, it’s not working for me and just leave

    There is a lot of information on this blog, you can search topics etc… ask questions, we usually answer quickly, if not ask again. Sometimes we chat and miss a post or 2!
    Best of luck and Welcome

  81. DorkyGuy says:

    @Cougar~ … If you get a bad vibe, just walk away. Get up from the table and leave the restaurant. Other SBs have suggested making an excuse to go to the bathroom and leaving (but in this case since the restaurant owner was in on it, no way in hell is being in a closed room a good idea).

    If a guy is being crude, you have no social obligation to him to complete the dinner. Just get up and leave.

  82. DorkyGuy says:

    Wow…. I literally slid into the blog tonight… the floor was all wet.. have you girls been up to no good? 😉

  83. Nwsugarbaby says:


    This blog is getting like Sugar Daddy chasers may the best girl win over the SD. Good luck to you and you will not be seeing an email from me. Nothing against you just I’d rather watch from the sidelines to see how this plays out with the SB bloggers. Its like really intense basketball game.

    @BlogSBs emailing princecharming

    Good luck to you all. You will all be now placed on SD the bachelor. The selection process will take place by SD prince charming in private and details will not be placed on this public blog. If he chooses to later use his rights to the show to make a little extra money to spend on the winning sugar then a consent form must be released.

  84. Cougar K.C. says:

    Hi I’m new here, just had my first “lunch date” with a potential SD yesterday. He turned out to be a sick pervert who really expected me to give him a hand job in the restaurant, as well as “do his friend” who was the owner of the resaurant. I spent the whole hour and a half fending him off then afterwards when I told him what I would expect if we were to meet again, he had the balls to say I didn’t respond in the correct way so he won’t be paying me and there will be no more dates!! Well, thank God for that, it just sucks I wasted my Saturday and $10 (between gas and parking) to be disappointed on my first try. He said he’d met several women on this sight who actually did this type of thing on the first meeting, Are you serious? I was totally embarassed as there were people in booth next to us and he was loud. Guess I’ll keep tryin tho :(

  85. Beach_Girl says:

    PrinceCharming~ That is funny, they didn’t know they were both SBs, do they know now?
    Why/how did you spook her?
    I have heard of a lot of SBs that present the next SB to the SD… I wonder if that is common?

  86. PrinceCharming says:


    I met all but the “bad” one IRL. SB#1 was sort of a mix, I’d found her online but the SB part happened IRL (and this was 13 years ago, so online was very different.) SB#1 introduced me to SB#2, and the 25yo (I’ll call her SB#4), but was sort of a pot SB, hard to explain without going into a lot of unhelpful detail) was someone SB#2 had found for me in her network of friends.

    So my best source of SBs has been previous SBs. Even funnier is the one potential SB I have right now (who’s not answering her email and I may have spooked) who I found on SA just in the past couple days has actually worked with SB#2! (Neither she nor SB#2 had any knowledge of each other being SBs.)

  87. Grasshopper says:

    @PrinceCharming – So these past SBs..You met them all IRL or online?

  88. Beach_Girl says:

    PrinceCharming~ lol my rattlesnake escaped / my husband hates surprises lol. I think it’s about trust and such… Yeah , if you had a SB that had a BF and didn’t say then yes, I guess that would be a red falg .

  89. PrinceCharming says:


    I think it would need to be discussed, the SB could be lying about it, but saying something like “I’d invite you over to see my place, but I have kids full time / my pet rattlesnake escaped / my husband hates surprises / so it isn’t a good idea” would be an acceptable thing. I think the issue is not hiding something. Like I said, it was one of the most obvious things about the flawed arrangement I can point to, after seeing her a couple months never having picked her up at her place where she ostensibly lived alone was pretty odd.

    I agree, personality is huge. If it was all about eye candy, a magazine would suffice :)

  90. Beach_Girl says:

    PrinceCharming~ so a SB that didn’t invite you to her house would be a fake or isn’t into the arrangement? sorry, I guess that confuses me a little. I guess it would have to be discussed or something…
    As for helping out and getting her on the right path, that is really what it’s all about I think. I know that it’s something I look forward to.
    I am older than most here, not that it’s a bad thing. But we do have our preferences. I am sure you have yours, I think it’s mostly about personality and being honest… having that Click! is important. I don’t think age to me is important, but I am older…
    Yes, my age is affecting me tonight lol

  91. PrinceCharming says:

    @SD Guru

    LOL, my apologies, I wasn’t expecting to become popular all of a sudden!

  92. PrinceCharming says:


    One of the highlights of my day is when one of the forrner SBs calls or posts on FB to talk to me, ask advise, or my absolute fave, tell me that they applied something they learned from me in their life and were happier because of it. I’m positive your former SDs feel the exact same way.


    I actually don’t have an age range, just a preference colored by my experience. If another early 20s came along that I clicked with, I’m sure I’d consider it.

    It’s funny you mention the SDs going to the SB’s house thing, because if I could point at ONE thing that was a warning sign on the near-scam, that would be it. Every other SB I’d actually been to their house, two of them by the third date, one of them (the first) pretty far along. The not-so-great SB deflected and avoided, and I figured out (right at the end) that it was due to her negotiating being exclusive, and had a BF living with her. The crazy thing is, I offered her multiple outs to disclose him and the only real issue would have been changing the allowance.

    I can understand the hesitation, especially if kids are involved, but if he’s providing as agreed and is trustworthy enough to date, I think allowing him to see where you live after a couple months makes a huge impact on how the SD sees the arrangement — at least it did for me. With all things, though, it depends on the arrangement, if I were a SB, I’m sure I’d never show a pure NSA pay per date SD my place.

    With my first SB, I just gave her the money. With the next 2 (I arguably have a couple “0.5”s too) I talked with them about plans and budgets, but the mistake I made in both cases wasn’t being forceful enough and following up with them once it was apparent that they handled money badly. One thing that I’m super happy about is that with the second long-term-SB-come-FT-relationship, I left her with tons more “life skills” than she had when we met, two different carreer options and supported her through some schooling that resulted in a state certification for one of the careers. I definitely violated rule #4 above with her, though, I ended up doing a lot of “fixing her life” type work, I don’t want to repeat that, but I’m proud of the results.

  93. Beach_Girl says:

    oups…. French Frog that is 😉

  94. Beach_Girl says:

    Guru~ lol PrinceCharming is going to be busy!!! lol

    Not a Frog lol… crap, i’m a frog… lol 😀

  95. Grasshopper says:

    @Guru – thanks for cluing me in..lol 😉

    @PrinceCharming – check your inbox

  96. Beach_Girl says:

    @PrinceCharmng~ “one of the posts I’ve made to someone else has instructions on how to find my profile.” you need to post that again lol or a profile #

    • SD Guru says:

      To save myself from getting many email exchange requests, here’s what PC wrote about how to find his profile and email him:

      “just search on the nickname “notafrog” and mail me”

  97. @princecharming- your close to me!:-)

  98. MidwestAnna says:

    @ PrinceCharming – Quirky indeed…. It’s a very odd little story. How do I find you? I’m new here, not sure how to email guru or whatever. It looks like you have plenty of prospects right now, but I’ve enjoyed our dialogue. :-)

  99. Grasshopper says:

    @Guru – you are SO wise! Oh..and sent you an email, btw 😉

    @MyPrinceCharming – Yes..you have impressed me, kind Sir! :)

  100. PrinceCharming says:

    @SD Guru

    100% in agreement!

    It’s taken multiple SBs, but I’ve learned all those rules the hard way. Even with the expense, I wouldn’t trade the results of the two long-term SBs for anything.

    PS: actually a wife wouldn’t have been cheaper 😀 (I’m in a forced community property state, and my earnings greatly exceeded any allowance). I only regret part of the expense, as some of it went to very worthwhile causes, and the ending, which was unplanned on my part and stung a little

  101. Beach_Girl says:

    @BeautifullySweeetSB~ you have to use your email from here and go to gravatar dot com to add your photo

  102. Beach_Girl says:

    Hi & Welcome BeautifullySweeetSB! Best of luck girl and please join in our convo… It’s always nice to have new people 😀

    @PrinceCharming~ Thanks for answering me 😀 amazing that you could give so much…I only wish!!! lol… but … i’m not in your age range 😀 lol… I am sure you won’t have a problem finding a SB with 5K a month allowance, unless you are in NYC or LA. Even at that Grasshopper is interested and I think she is young too 😀 . I can’t even imagine having a SD buy me a house or a car. I was wondering, do most SDs expect to go to the SBs house? I seem to read a lot about SDs going over to SBs, I don’t know if I would like a SD to come to my house …
    Do you ask the SBs you are with if they have a plan for the allowance or you don’t care?
    Just curious…I am always curious about SDs and how what they expect and the likes… I know one SD makes contracts and the SB has to have a plan for her future, do you do something like that?

  103. I love it when i can still call my former sds for advice, or just to hang out. I feel like such a lucky girl to have amazing ex’s that i can talk to about anything and everything.

  104. Grasshopper says:

    @BeautifullySweeetSB – Welcome and good luck with that pot! :)

  105. BeautifullySweeetSB says:

    Can someone please tell me how to put a picture next to my name?

  106. PrinceCharming says:


    Wow, I’m surprised I’ve made such an impression! I’m normally pretty modest, but if you forgive me, yeah, I’m a really great guy and still close friends with my two long-term SBs, 13 and 7 years after we first met, and both spread the word about me :)


    [email protected] the .5, I know what you mean, there’s always that quirky one that sneaks in there.
    I’m actually not in CA, I’m the next state to the right (and down, if you’re starting from Norcal).
    FWIW one of the posts I’ve made to someone else has instructions on how to find my profile.

    I’ve definitely picked up the “no effort to impress” that you mentioned, and it was one of the reasons I went with the 23yo that turned out not so great, as she made a concerted effort to woo me, which impressed me enough to go along. I’ve definitely noticed the beautiful woman syndrome as well, which is why I don’t go after the 10K+ hotties here… lol, no thanks.

  107. BeautifullySweeetSB says:

    Hi everyone! If it hadn’t been for all of you wonderful SD’s and SB’s on here I wouldn’t have known anything about how this whole SA works. It’s fun to watch you guys joke around on here. I hope to become apart of the blogging family. Anywho I had my first meeting with a Pot SD. He seemed really nice but then again it was only our first time meeting. So only time will tell if he’s going to be my SD. Wish me luck!

  108. PrinceCharming says:


    Happy to answer… No SB at the moment and the potential hasn’t emailed so my night is sadly free…

    Yeah, it wasn’t the best deal and I should have pulled the plug at the first disappearance, but the prior SB/FT relationship of years had ended just a few months before, and that was *so* expensive that 5K didn’t seem so bad especially for a very hot, very young SB… until the extras, no-shows and restrictions made it blow up. I really got spoiled by my first SB, who while a little flaky and a bit resentful of “only” 2.5K/mo, got along with me (on and off) for years.

    It’s crazy, but I know another SB in my town (friend of my last long-term SB) who had a very, very wealthy SD that bought a $500K house just for her (but in his name) and a $80K Mercedes, less than six months into the arrangement, and when they broke up, he made the down payment on another house for her and gave her the car. (I’ve done the same on a much smaller scale, but there were extenuating circumstances.)

    With the 12K/mo SB, it basically started as a smaller allowance, and we really clicked and it basically turned into a full-time relationship after about 6 months, then the whole arrangement/relationship line got super blurry and then just faded, but that level of allowance was still needed to keep things going — so SB may or may not be the right label by this point. It probably could have been done for less, but I didn’t have the time to micro-manage her spending and just threw money at the problem. (My mistake.)

    I’ve never had a “stand by” type arrangement, dates have almost always been scheduled in advance, once the second SB I had (the long term one above) migrated into full-time status, it still wasn’t standby, but we had an open-door policy where either of us could show up at the other’s place whenever we wanted, but due to some other considerations I couldn’t just call her and say that she needed to be at my place in 30 minutes.

    I can give so much because I earn well into the six figures and I live like a monk (seriously, my living expenses are like 30K a year, taxes are by far my biggest expense) I live in kind of a dumpy place and work a lot, so regular dating hasn’t worked very well for me, but the sugar route has been pretty sweet when I’ve had a good SB. Honestly, I know I’ve greatly overpaid two of the SBs I’ve had, and have since greatly throttled back my offers to anyone new, if we click I’ll probably be very “nice” to them, but I don’t think I’ll go much past 5K ever again, it just seems to be taken for granted and makes the SB’s life too easy and too prone to taking advantage or generating drama, none of the things a SB should be.

    • SD Guru says:


      Thanks for sharing your stories and I’m sure your generosity has gotten the attention of many SB’s out there! :)

      Your stories are good examples of why we need these golden rules, so repeat after me:

      1. Don’t reward bad behavior.
      2. Don’t ignore warning signs.
      3. Don’t expect someone’s behavior to change over time.

      And especially for NSA SD’s,
      4. Don’t let her problems become yours.

      When it comes to sugar relationships, throwing more money at a problem won’t necessarily solve it. As for your 12k/mo SB for five years, some would argue that a wife is probably cheaper! 😛 And the arrangement that was bordering on a scam, that’s what happens when you reward bad behavior. As you’ve learned your lessons I hope you’ll be able to spend your money wisely and enjoy your arrangements more. It makes no sense to spend all that money and be miserable!

      the two younger SBs I saw were very inhibited… but I’ve not pursued many since those experiences and I’m wondering if it was just bad luck?

      It’s probably bad luck. There are plenty of younger SB’s who are uninhibited.

  109. Grasshopper says:

    @PrinceCharming – ok…done! I asked Guru..hopefully you will get it soon :)

  110. Grasshopper says:

    @PrinceCharming – haha..you really ARE Prince Charming..aren’t you 😉 Sorry you had to go through that/those unpleasant experience(s) :/
    It just makes me mad when some chicks exploit like that – makes it harder for all the good ones :: points to self 😉 ::
    Will gladly ask Guru to forward my email addy to you…even with that measley 4.5k allowance you’re offering…psh! ::drools:: LoL! ..haha..seriously, though….for that kind of allowance I’d WANT to give you a tongue bath and BEG you to video tape it! ;D
    (that was in reference to a previous post, of course) 😉

  111. MidwestAnna says:


    As far as acceptable time frame is concerned, it hasn’t changed much with age. I’ve had 3.5 sugar relationships (the .5 is a long story). My first was at 20 and I am now in my mid 20’s. I’ve always needed at least 3-4 dates to feel comfortable. If there is a second date, I want to move forward and do my best to show my interest.

    What I notice frequently in younger women is a lack of enthusiasm or desire to impress. The truth of the matter is that beautiful women don’t have to try very hard, but as we get older, we become more aware of what behaviors are advantageous…. I’m not sure why, but it seems to be in my character to want to woo or win over everyone I meet, platonic or romantic, male or female. I like to put my best foot forward no matter who I’m interacting with. I am an SB, but I have also had and SM profile. Im only 25, but I found the 18-22 year olds very boring and difficult to talk to. Many of the older women came across as pros or hypersexual in a way that isn’t appealing to me. It’s hard to strike a balance I guess.

    Hats off to you for being so open minded and such a gentleman! Can I assume you live in CA?

  112. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars!

    @PrinceCharming~ 5K a month and you didn’t see her??? sorry I didn’t read up and 12K a month to another??? insane money!! I know someone that get 10K a month but I still can’t believe that someone would give that amount… sorry, I guess I am not in that league!
    I guess we can all dream that at some point we get that … 😀 Do you ask them to be on stand by to be ready when your free? how can you give so much? sorry, if this is a lot questions, just curious! you really don’t have to answer, i’m just curious…

    Hope everyone had a great weekend!

  113. PrinceCharming says:


    Actually, it was 4.5K a month (1K per week) as negotiated; I was aiming for 2.5-3K as I had done with my very first SB, and she was aiming for 5K plus some expenses. She had a few “emergencies” (tuition, dental work for real, and an “advance” so she could move here that I’m pretty sure actually went to a lawyer) and actually no-showed for nearly a full month, like I said, kind of a sucky bordering on scam arrangement. Once I pointed out there was pretty much nothing in the arrangment for me and I was considering ending it, she tried to cram every missed date into one month, then sudden disappeared for a week and I ended it then. In the end I think it worked out to about 35K for about 20 dates total, nice gig for her that she total blew (or not, pardon the pun.) So it was very close to a scam, but not entirely. There was a point about 6 weeks in where my intuition told me I should pull the plug, but ignored it, partly out of morbid curiosity (i.e. to see just how “bad” bad could be) and partly out of hope that she’d warm up. She did, but not by much. The story gets very interesting after the fact, but nothing I can share in public.

    The SB before her converted to a FT relationship that was averaging about 12K/mo for five years, but I’ve sworn that level off considering how much drama is had v. money spent. I’d consider 5K (presents inclusive) again, but that’d be about my limit and she’d _really_ have to rock my world. ;P I’d be deleriously happy at 2.5K cash and 1K presents/entertainment a month, but that doesn’t appear to get anyone excited, it sure looks like 1K/week cash is something of a standard… so… I’m guessing I’m not getting that email from Guru, LOL!

  114. Grasshopper says:

    @PrinceCharming – Re:”and after 3
    months and 30K of sugar (2X agreement)”

    So the original agreement was for 5k a month? My question is if that was the amount she asked for or if that is the amount you offered her? Was there any negotiating that took place? – and do you still give out 5k-10k allowances? If you do, I’ll be asking Guru to forward my email to you shortly ;P

  115. NYG says:

    You got your answer? :)
    I got mine. :)
    What is why the site made this way SBs can not mail each other – jealousy .


    If you think your profile is hopeless… You should see mine, seriously. We should bet whose profile is more hopeless and let Guru decide .:))

  116. PrinceCharming says:


    Maybe a little TMI for a family blog (lol). They were 23 and 25, the 23yo I’d dated for over a month before we got physical, and after 3 months and 30K of sugar (2X agreement) was still very inhibited, most of my comments related to her. The 25yo I had dated for a month before getting physical, and was was about as involved as a mannequin, which was really wierd. Both has SDs before, but the 23yo claimed to have had only one that never got physical (but she lied a *lot*, so I’m a skeptic.) One of my older SBs had talked to the 25 yo right before we started dating and passed on that she’d basically attended orgies and participated in a threesome a week before we first dated. So something seriously does not compute. Trust me, I do everything in my power to put women at ease and obviously don’t jump into the physical side on date one or two.

    @Nawty Molly

    I think not playing with spot is a given, and if a SD is asking for that, OK, he’s a freakzoid! I would think video recording things in general would be pretty close to/over the edge and generally reserved for a pretty established arrangement. Yikes! I don’t even talk about sex on the first date. Presuming the SB isn’t retarded, she knows I want it, and I know she knows I want it, and she’s came to the first date so we can see if we have chemistry; if we do, there’s a second date and that implicitly shows she’s OK with the idea of sex in theory, and we try to figure out how to reach a comfort level from there.


    Do you have a feel for acceptable time/rate for the relationship? There’s no hard rules, clearly, but I’ve been a gentleman SD to all and done my best to make everyone comfortable. It seems to me the younger women are, the slower you go; both my 28yo SBs were ready to jump in feet first on a second date, and the young ones it was a month and 4-6 dates before sticking a toe in the water and I’m getting the sense here that this might not be the norm, which is why I’m asking the question — the game seems so much different in my experience between 23 and 28. Part of my concern is also that the young SBs may have either not been into it, or playing innocent to avoid a physical relationship (which also reflects not being into it.)

    Behind all these questions is my grappling with the fact that something like 90% of the SBs in my area are 24 and younger, and if I could figure out what it takes for us to both be happy, my potential pool increases in size by nearly a factor of 10.

  117. Ec says:

    Toronto Ladies, watch out for Honeybadger…he will say he can meet your needs (1000-3000) but after one meet will say he can only “afford” one meet a month. Such liars on here sometimes. Very uncool.

  118. @SD Guru please pass nyg my email address. If she has a issue with something that happened I’m the last blog, ide prefer her bring it up in private instead of making snitty little comments directed word me.

  119. MidwestAnna says:

    @ PrinceCharming – I’ve never been asked for anything peculiar, but I know I would feel very put off if I felt like someone was trying to “get their moneys worth”. In fact, it would be hurtful. The extent of my affection is limitless if I am comfortable and happy. Like in any relationship, it takes time, especially as a young girl in uncharted territory. The more effort put forth to help me feel at ease, the more inclined I feel to reciprocate.

  120. Nawty Molly says:

    Well, I’m a gammer and I’ve never speed dated! And by the way, I don’t have a basement, I have a dungeon with swings and all kinds of interesting play things! 😉

    As far as my “limit” is concerned, I don’t go for the beastiality thing…..at all. Of course, I’m not in my twenties (sometimes I wish I was, but, I’m enjoying my sexual peak right now). I’m sure Spot will be very disappointed… I can make an exception for him though, as long as he brings the Cadbury Eggs! 😉

    There was this one time when a POT asked me if I would give him a tongue bath and there was a time limit. He also wanted to video tape it…lol. That made me feel weird. I guess it all depends on the comfort level. If I really don’t know you and we’ve never had a first date then please don’t ask for a tongue bath and to video tape it, it’s a real turn off. 😀

    Hmm, after reading my post, it seems as if my thoughts are a little scattered…sorry. 😀

    Hope all of you are having a great weekend! I’m too sick to enjoy anything so it’s back to bed for me!!


  121. VanillaSugar says:

    Hello all!
    @PrinceCharming I’ve never encountered any “freaks” lol (unless I’m just one myself :-))..But, I’ve never even been in a SD/SB arrangement before. Anyway, I am very open sexually, with the right person of course. There has to be an attraction. I need to feel like you’re into me, that you want to please me, and not just concerned with getting your own rocks off! So I want kissing, caressing..Allllll of the 12 play! As far as oral goes, it’s something that I like to do in my own time, when you least expect it. I don’t like it when someone asks me for it, or push my head down. I actually stopped talking to a guy because of that lol…Love different positions and different places–in the bed, on the floor, standing up against the wall, in a chair, on the couch, on the balcony, in the car, in the park, at the bathroom in at a party ,in the shower, and wherever else! Never been in a pool though, but have been in a jacuzzi, which was great! Love for my hair to get pulled, neck to be grabbed, bit, and spanked lol..not right away, but I’ll let you know when :-)..is that tmi?? Sorry if it is lol..Btw, I wasn’t always like this, it took some time. Was only like like this with 2 people, which were boyfriends.

    How many times were you with them?? How old were they? Did they had many experiences before you? If not, you should ask them what they like, what feels good to them. You have to communicate with each other and learn each others pleasures. Sometimes it happens the first time, sometimes you have to work at it. Just depends on the people and setting…So what types of things were you trying to do that they weren’t into??

    Oh, I made my 1st revision. I guess you can take a look tomorrow and tell me what you think :-)

  122. babydoll says:


    @NYG~i only mean tfor us guys to help out check if there is anything that cna be done witn Mymi
    Sb’s dilemma i didnt mean for anyone to change anything aboutb preference on their own profiles!

    i never put my own profile number here as i am so inactive but dont think any less if anyone put theirs and feel the need for suggestions to other Sb/Sd on the blog.. lol

    re meg/jen?/LaSD being in each others bak i never really noticed it!!
    i should really put more attention on the bloggers here xxx
    i just know before if anyonne wanted help a lot of the Sb/Sd try to make suggestions on how to make a profile more atttactiveto pot Sb/Sd thats the point i was trying to make. and i am sure your profil is good and you dnt need to do anything different unless you want to 😉
    my profil is hopeless and i am not reeally looking for anyone on the site.

  123. CupcakeNotMuffin says:

    I say make applepie :)

  124. PrinceCharming says:

    @redheadSB (and anyone else for that matter)

    I don’t think gamers do speed dating, when they come out of the basement they usually date the normal ways in my experience. Singles that don’t do bars/clubs is the main clientele.

    On the boundaries, I’d like to hear from you and other 20-somethings what makes a “freak” that you run away from? As I mentioned before, my older SBs were down for pretty much anything that wasn’t an over-the-top fetish, but the two younger SBs I saw were very inhibited (as in looking at me like I asked them to pleasure themselves with a cactus as the suggestion of performing oral, and the one that did had a facial expression suggesting she was indeed being pleasured by said cactus.) I love how beautiful younger women are and how happy they can be with “sugar” I provide, but I’ve not pursued many since those experiences and I’m wondering if it was just bad luck?

  125. redheadSB says:

    @ Princecharming

    O that’s wonderful! I am only 23 but had a 3 and a half relationship with an SD from this site that started when I was 19 so it can be all that bad eh? :-) Yeah I’m not too “speed dating savvy” but I imagine those are more for parents who don’t get out much, people who work a lot, and gamers? Definitely not my thing! I want to be able to be upfront about most things and this allows me to be.

    At least this way I can let the other party know what my sexual boundaries are and can walk away if I want without it being weird. Sometimes you get along great up until the intimate part. I have met some freaks on here!! Ugh

  126. Tina says:

    @Phone Guy: I like the poking, but you called me Dragon Lady…..I’m still contemplating whether you should be rewarded or punished…….hmmmm……

  127. Jessie says:

    Posting your profile number has absolutely NOTHING to do with how confident you are. And if all it took to attract, find and keep a SD was to post your profile number on the blog, well…the blog would be clogged with SBs profile number on a daily basis. This blog is set up so that ANYONE can seek help in regards to ANYTHING that relates to the sugar lifestyle. So if help is needed, in whatever category, ask away.

  128. DorkyGuy says:

    @PrinceCharming~ The first 2 weeks of going Diamond were very busy. Most of the local SBs that approached me were in that first two weeks. After that, it was almost all out-of-area.

  129. PhoneGuy says:

    @Tina, methinks I just poked the dragon. 😉

    Jennie, I think the blog is a great place to attract someone. You get a much better sense of someone’s personality than just reading their profile and sending a few email. The problem is that it’s too small a group. And a big enough group to find someone in would have way too many comments in it to be able to read.

  130. LASB says:

    I don’t see anything wrong with posting a profile number. The blog is here for people to get advice, and when you first join the site, it’s not always easy to know what to say (and especially what not to say!) in your profile. When I first found the blog, I asked for help with my profile and got a lot of great feedback. I have seen many others do the same, including SDs.

  131. PrinceCharming says:


    You mentioned SB approaching several times, would it be correct to infer it resulted in more SBs approaching you (rather than you chasing them?) I’m also curious if it resulted in significantly more out-of-area SBs contacting you with the expectation that you’d fly them in, etc?

    It’s also interesting that you reported your income/net worth low, I do that same thing, as does another SD I bumped into at a different forum; I think it might be a trend that real SDs significantly under-disclose income for the reason you mentioned, e.g. to get the SBs to set realistic expectations.

    @Everyone: Since how long it takes has come up a few times in the past couple days, for what it’s worth, my time (this go ’round) from starting to the first credible pot SB is now at one week; might just be luck; 18 months ago it took about 2 months.

    One thing I am noticing compared to 18 months ago is a lot more SBs that are, frankly, “desperate” which concerns me since if a SB isn’t in it for anything but money, they burn out quickly.

  132. DorkyGuy says:

    My profile number is 69

  133. I don’t post my profile number on here because I don’t need to. I feel that coming onto the blog and and posting a profile number displays a lack of confidence in someones ability to attract a SD on their own.

  134. Tina says:

    Oh dear Phone Guy, you sure about that? Think you can handle it? I pull back on the blog since I don’t want to offend anyone….MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

    @babydoll: sound away! I’m sure SDinLA will have a snarky comment that involves blowing on horns and sucking golf balls through them…..hehehehehehe And, there has been some help already! :)

  135. NYG says:

    Baby doll.

    I have never posted my profile number in here.
    And I was told by blog SD! girls post their profiles here to get a SD from the blog. ?
    I don’t know I thought girls just sincerely asking for help. ?

    And later we have blog dramas. like BeachGirl posted that hate latter she got from a blog girl,
    And this thing b/w Meg/Jennie and LA SD Epic post analyzing it. :)
    …. you would not want me to continue …

    May be a girl can write here I wrote that “….” in my profile … is it good or I need to change
    something? I don’t know.

  136. babydoll says:

    happy noon all xxx 12.16 London time

    @Mymi~ oh i think you would have to wait a bit longer than a day for anyone actually make a move to make contact with regards to any arrangment.
    i am sure your profile is done well and you are an interesting person :)
    but if you are unsure maybe some of the lovely Sugarbabies on the blog maybe help you to check out on what you can ‘tweak’ as they say 😉 these girls and our blog Sd’s are brilliant as well in helping out when it comes to these things :) i would love to help but not sure how ! xxx

    if you wait a bit,i will call on the others!!!

    come on Sugars damsel in distress!!!! ….
    hello?… pfff hello?? where’d everybody go??
    seriously? do i always need to sound the horn on the top of the tower before we get any assistance here?!

    good gawd

  137. DorkyGuy says:

    Does having kinky fantasies of Meg Ryan as she was in the 80’s make me a “retrobate”?

  138. DorkyGuy says:

    @PrinceCharming~ I was in the Diamond Club for several months. Here are my observations:

    1) The quality of SBs who approached was much higher
    2) A lot of the SBs that you wouldn’t want to talk to self-filtered (didn’t think they were good enough for a diamond club I guess)
    3) SBs who approached put a lot more effort into it
    4) SBs didn’t have their cynical “you might be a fake” filters up, so conversation was much more natural.
    5) Sure a lot of the SBs had dollar signs in their eyes, but a lot were just normal girls without outrageous expectations. This may partly be because I listed my income/networth relatively low, which helped to manage expectations.
    6) Unless you are planning to go through a ton of SBs in a year (in which case are you really a SD?), it is better to pay for Diamond Club monthly instead of paying for the whole year.

    I wouldn’t hesitate to do it again.

  139. Grasshopper says:

    @PhoneGuy – or perhaps a full length pic showing her DOING body shots?

  140. PhoneGuy says:

    @NWSB & Mymi,
    Yep, smiling makes everyone look better.
    You should probably also add a second pic showing a full length body.shot.

  141. Nwsugarbaby says:


    I’m sure you would wear that t-shirt on every first met with a potential SB. I think it would make the point pretty clear…just kidding. It would make an epic shirt, but it would probably have to be wore in a more private setting.


    I think anytime you can be specific about what you want and what type of person you are the more helpful it is for a pot SD to know if they are right for you/ you are right for them. Also a picture of you smiling would add to the initial appeal.

  142. PhoneGuy says:

    Brave or stupid…my friends haven’t figured out which. 😀

  143. NYG says:

    Meg is gone,
    ER hiding in cave.

    PrinceC. Dorky Was the only D member here, no?
    all these conspiracy theory … I even do not know Guru or VA, or LA , or NC profile’ numbers. :)

    PhoneGuy…. oh… U r asking for sarcasm … u r sooo brave. :)

  144. Mymi says:

    A bit off topic: I registered to this website only yesterday. I know that my profil needs adjustments, but I would like to have your comments on how you think I could make it better. I think that my picture is appealing as it attracts many men to look at my profil, but my presentation must be off because very few actually talk to me. My number is 921593. Thank you for your comments!

  145. MidwestAnna says:

    @ NYG —

    I completely agree! The more forthright a potential SD is up front, the more comfortable and interested I am. Coaxing personal information isn’t something I would want to have it done to me, so I am patient. Most of the high profile people I’ve met on SA have used discretion at first, but one revealed everything within two days of communication. He was in a particularly vulnerable position, highly visible… It seemed highly illogical, but either he underestimates our intelligence, or gets a thrill. I suspect that it was a little bit of both.

  146. PhoneGuy says:

    Yeah, where is Meggie? And Tina, you can me your sarcasm. 😉

    @NWSugarBaby, Brandon should make up shirts:
    Sugar Daddy : Bringing Finance
    Sugar Baby: Bringing Hotness
    I want one already.

  147. babydoll says:

    @_Sdboo~I’m starting to think as much as I like the idea of this the actual application of it doesn’t sit right with me on some emotional level I guess. Anyone ever feel that way?

    = i dont mean to offend you,but are you gay?

    @dutchy~get well soon xxxxx

    @englishrose~get out of that bloody cave!!!

  148. PrinceCharming says:

    After reading NYG’s comments… any SDs with Diamond here that can comment on effect of it?

  149. Tina says:

    Wait, Dorky DOESN’T want sarcastic, biting e-mails? DAMMIT! SDinLA, need your e-mail address so I can get my sarcastic out…… we ALL know what you like, you sadistic little man! 😉

  150. Tina says:

    Oh where, oh where has my Meggie gone? Oh where, oh where can she beeeeeeeeeeeeeeee?

  151. NYG says:

    Grasshopper .
    About your theory why guys give up all the info and their psychology.
    I can not agree with your theory … Actually 3 submissive guys did not give me their last names.
    And e guys who provided all the info were pretty powerful, decisive in person.
    About adrenaline rush/parachute jumps – risk the info… Depend on a girl/if she is crazy enough tontell his wife, mail his company ..? the guys are successful and they did not just ran into this Big money , they are smart.

    I have to ask myself them, ” what is the reason you gave me your job web site before you even met me in person. ” ?

    it might be the same reason Dorky got a verify/D account. So a girl would take him more seriously and her mails would be less sarcastic , more meaningful. ?

    Coz I was exchanging e mails with one guy , and soon he wrote “I see you are not too interested in me.. Coz your mails are just very short answers….” . Next day he e mail me “by mistake” (I still do not know intentionally or not) from his mail which says his real name (or may be he just e mail me from I phone and you know how at the end each mail it say some standard phrase… Actually my says “sent from telepathic aura”). anyway….
    as i learn here “google everything you can google” :) I googled his name and saw Wiki page about him, his picture, what he invented…where he works now, who his parents…

    believe me …. my e mails got longer, more serious, more meaningful :)) if the latter possible :)
    yes, I look at him more seriously right away. :)
    these real SDs are not nobodies , for the last 20 years they were treated with adoration and deep respect from employees, partners, senators… and now a young girl flirting with him, And he has to prove he worth a lot, he has to be taken seriously… and we, girls got our portion of bad apples, we do not believe in everything he says/wrote in profile so easily … We got burn before too.
    to prove he is not a bad apple he is a real SD he would provide his real info. ? still too risky for him.

  152. Nwsugarbaby says:

    @Southern_sd- I think both sides are always going to wonder at least initially what the other persons intentions are and if they like you for you or just cause you bring something to the table. Guys bringing Finance and Girls bringing hottness.

    If you do decide that money is part of the problem you can always become more of a gift sd.
    Anyway have a great weekend and I hope you find something that works for you.

  153. @MidwestAnna- Very much agreed. I tottaly prefer to see myself in a monogamous relationship at some point. Until then, I’m just enjoying life.

  154. MidwestAnna says:


    As SBs we all have material expectations, it just doesn’t seem tasteful to have an up front expectation, before you even meet. More serious discussions should occur once two people meet and determine that they like each other.

    I date very successful men in the real world and while I am open to any possibility, I wouldn’t say that I am looking for love on SA. I enjoy the simplistic and practical nature of arrangements and at points in my life have much preferred them to traditional relationships.

  155. @MidwestAnna- I know how you feel about the money exchange. It feels degrating for me to say “give me xxx amount of dollars” I’d rather just have someone around who does nice things for me because he wants to.

  156. Nawty Molly says:

    MidwestAnna ~ I usually go by Anna Molly, but, my naughty twin sister has decided to post today…lol. No big deal, really. 😀

    Just remember ya’ll, I may say that I’m gone, but, I’m always lurking…..ALWAYS LURKING…. 😉

  157. Nawty Molly says:

    MidwestAnna ~ lol, not at all! 😀

  158. MidwestAnna says:

    @ Nawty Molly – Thank you!!! I didn’t take your name, did I? I would be happy to change it to something else.

    @DorkyGuy – Thanks for the warm welcome and for the compliment.

    It seems a little nuts for either party to have expectations of a person they’ve never laid eyes on. I mean, everyone I’ve ever met in person has wanted to pursue an arrangement, but what if I’d shown up and was 40lbs heavier than my pictures and the Daddy 15 years older. These things happen! An up front exchange of money or gifts just feels yucky to me.

  159. DorkyGuy says:

    If you ever do get bored in a windy city, just walk down the street in a short loose skirt holding an umbrella.

  160. Wind doesn’t bother me. I just love big city’s. There’s always so much going on, and so much to do there.

  161. Nawty Molly says:

    okay, I’m really going now. I’ll catch all of you later.


  162. Dutch Girl In London says:

    Well – Is it pretty ‘windy’ in NY?

  163. @Nawty Molly – Yes, I’ve been to NY lots of times. I love it there. If I could leave cali and move out there I would…

  164. Nawty Molly says:

    Since there is a MidwestAnna now, should I keep my Nawty Molly name? I don’t want to confuse anyone…lol? Thoughts/suggestions are welcome. 😀

  165. DorkyGuy says:

    @MidwestAnna~ so good to see what you wrote! I really like your approach to your first date. Welcome to the blog by the way :)

  166. Nawty Molly says:

    Welcome MidwestAnna! 😀

  167. Nawty Molly says:

    Is that a hint Jennie? lol 😀

    See!! I said I wouldn’t be gone for too long! 😀

    Jennie, you’ll love NYC!! Have you been before? It is so much fun!
    I’ve had the chance to experience two galas in the city and it was amazing! I went to the James Beard Gala/auction and I met my favorite chef…I was so star struck it wasn’t funny and the other was for the Met at the Cloisters. For the Cloisters event, I had my first personal shopping experience and it was fantastic, the only way to shop I must say. My gent purchased a St. John evening gown that was to die for ( he has great taste)!

    I’m going to stop now because I will ramble on forever and I’m feeling gushy. I don’t want to bore anyone. 😀

    Anyway, have fun on your trip! When are you going?

  168. Dutch Girl In London says:

    @Jenny – is it a SD we ‘know’? LOL

  169. MidwestAnna says:

    Hi Everyone. I am new to the blog and have thoroughly enjoyed reading the discussion. It is refreshing to know that there are so many other thoughtful, intelligent, like minded babies out there. Now, on to the questions:

    Have you met a bad apple Sugar Daddy or Sugar Baby on the website?

    Yes! I have only had a few sugar relationships and was very naive in the beginning. My first Daddy was extremely controlling and not a very nice guy. He paid off all of my debt and showered me in gifts, but the emotional consequence of being with someone I didn’t like was too great and I ended things after four months of involvement. I could go into more detail, but it doesn’t seem proper to divulge in a public forum. Let’s just say that my expectations and standards have changed drastically over the last several years.

    Has the experience discouraged you in any way?

    At first, yes, but I’ve met some wonderful people here and am glad to have kept an open mind. I am never involved in simultaneous relationships (yuck!) and most of my dating the last few years has been in the real world. I am also gainfully employed and financially stable, negating the need for this type of situation. If I become involved with a Daddy, it’s because I like him and it feels right.

    Do you have any suggestions on how to deal with such bad apple Sugar Daddies or Babies?

    If something feels amiss, it probably is. Any indication that the person you’re communicating with isn’t being real (male or female), you need take that seriously! Watch out for the Sugar Players. These guys talk a big game and seem eager to meet, but don’t make much of an effort to get to know you first. In my experience, the more transparent, the better. That isn’t to say that real names and identities should be divulged off the bat. A lot can be learned through a substantial conversation. If a comfort level isn’t there, don’t do it!!

    I’ve seen a lot of discussion of whether a potential Daddy should bring money to an initial meeting. My thought? Absolutely not. In fact, I would be embarrassed if a stranger handed me money. Minimal expectations are best at first. The nuts and bolts can be worked out if/when both parties are interested in proceeding.

  170. @ Dutch Girl- Woohoo! Sure is! I hear he’s a cool cat. Lol

  171. Dutch Girl In London says:

    @Jenny – Woohoo, that sounds exciting, is it a sugar trip?

    @SDInLA – Where is Spot? I could have used his company this week, we would have watched old movies together.

  172. Nawty Molly says:

    Dutch Girl ~ I’ve been very sick too! It was awful!! It’s still kinda’ lingering, but, I’m not contagious. Well, I might be contagious/infectious, but, in a good way! 😉

    I hope everyone has a great weekend!! I’m sure I’ll be back as it’s hard to stay away from the blog.


  173. @ Dutch Girl oooh, I know how you feel. I’ve had a whole week worth of downtim tooe…. Not fun at all… I’m in need of being spoiled,snuggled, and taken care of…. I cant wait for my trip to NY… yipee!

  174. Dutch Girl In London says:

    I am in need of some spoiling as I have been ill all week with a very bad cold/vomiting bug. I could not even go for a run this morning and I am having serious endorphin/dopamine (Runner’s High) withdrawal symptoms, this is soooooooo not fun.

    On a brighter note, my travel SD is coming to London end of this month – yay!

  175. Nawty Molly says:

    No can do, sorry SDinLA. :(
    Hmmm, I’ll just have to bring my riding crop I suppose. 😉

  176. SDinLA says:

    @Nawty SCSB is on her way over though, so maybe you can bring the new swings over to my dungeon.

    Off to brunch, hope everyone is having a good weekend…

  177. SDinLA says:

    @SouthernCharmSB What are you doing posting on the blog, you’re supposed to be here in 5 minutes! Maybe I’m not the only one who needs a spanking today.

    They denied my warranty claim for the pump in my fountain. Said it wasn’t designed for liquids as viscous as chocolate. Can you believe that. I didn’t even tell them about trying caviar. or the naked sushi. Or the….

  178. Nawty Molly says:

    *SouthernSD* lol, sorry! 😀

  179. Nawty Molly says:

    SDinLA ~ We can play in my dungeon! I have some new swings I want to try out!! 😉

  180. Nawty Molly says:

    Good for you Souther SD!! 😀

    Hi All, I’m so bored…nothing on the agenda for this weekend. :(

  181. SDinLA says:

    @Southern_sd Sorry mate, I should really not go off shouting “j’accuse” when I’ve had a few drinks. It was the “boo” part that got me suspicious. That and the recent spate of trolls. What were you trying to type that managed to end up as sdboo? I’m still not sure you just don’t have a granny fetish though. 😉

    Yeah, I can see where that might be an issue if you have daughters the same age as your SB, or close to it.

    @VanillaSugar I’m glad it was amusing to you at least. :-)

    @Nawty Molly Your dungeon or mine?

  182. SouthernCharmSB says:

    Good morning sugar fam!! Whoa! Lots to catch up on and it’s tempting to sit here and read through everything….but, since it’s a beautiful sunny day, I’m off to enjoy the day sugar-style! Hope everyone has a wonderful weekend! xoxo :)

  183. southern_sd says:

    I’ve pondered this throughout the day and PhoneGuy you seem to have hit the nail on the head. Either my brain is going to connect all the dots and become OK with this type of arrangment or it’s going to constantly question in the background. Maybe upping the age to 24-28 will help like you and others suggested.

    @NWsugarbaby, you are right it’s letting it go down that path. Everything works well and I’m very uninhibited in that realm. What happens is I get caught in this “fix it, mentor, advice, let me help her make the best choice here.. mode” and not “I want to bang her brains out mode” It’s 100% mental because she and the previous SB were both very attractive. It might really be the money thing too though I’ve could never go to strip clubs in my early 20’s it just felt weird paying to watch of have some chick grind on me…..nope couldn’t do that either.

    Gonna give it another crack this weekend coming and thanks for all of the well wishes…. 😉 she is a cool chic!

    As far as the other topic giving full address, name, employer, etc that won’t be happening maybe after 4-5 months, but that sets off way too many RED FLAGS for me. All it took was that one blackmail story I read to seal that deal I haven’t trusted either SB that much.

  184. babydoll says:

    hello all !!! just kisses to everyone ..

    hmm apparently my profile was featured here? hmm strange.
    well,i guess … Thank you is in order?

    well, thanks xxx

    SDin La~ haaha i already have all the colors of lingerie as Sd has a habit of buying me loads in different types and colors!! but i still havent got in my toy collection that Vibrating panty!!! hhahaha or that chess set! 😉

    gotta go,shoot have to do my nails yet,my hair yet…. arrgghh nothing to wear as usual!
    off to a salsa event xxx
    have a great saturday all!!!

  185. Is anyone else having issues with getting emails that they just can’t read? Err. I keep getting all of these forgin people that email me. They speak English, but not so well. Its annoying when i have to sit there for hours trying to decipher the message. I hate to automatically exclude someone that may be a nice person. But, if i can’t crack code….. i don’t see it working out.

  186. Nwsugarbaby says:

    Google- I found out that a SD I was seeing lied about his age needless to say it didnt work out.

    @SDinLA I don’t even think it would get to that point for Southern_sdboo. I think he may have troubles with letting things lead down that path. I hope he figures out a solution for him and although I could be a solution id rather keep on my cute summer dress that I usually wear with my hat and boots. Maybe after he resolves this issue he would be more appealing with more confidence. Porn stars are young so maybe he can see if that turns him on. It definitely could be the age difference, money involved, lack of connection, physical problems, etc.

    I wish I could explain the fire/pyro thing fully, but it would be reveling more about myself than there should be in a public place. I’ll explain a quick couple of things about it though. I have loved the warmth of a nice hott fire place growing up and watching the wood burn, pop, and crackle. I now enjoy starting the fire in the wood stove. I haven’t started any dangerous fires though of course. Just in general everything is better hotter 😉

    @Va_Gentleman- I think that is a good rule of thumb that seems to work for you. It probably limits you from dating a lot of coeds though.

  187. Grasshopper says:

    @NYG/all – I have a theory about men like these..about WHY they divulge so much to strangers – and it’s not so much about intelligence or naivety, but rather all about psychology. Perhaps they suffer from poor self esteem and/or a form of exhibitionism that deals with “exposing” their lives..as opposed to their genitals. Perhaps it’s about the thrill/rush they get when they’re at the mercy of someone who could quite possibly ruin them – much like those that need to do physically dangerous things like jumping out of airplanes. Now that I am thinking about it, these tell-all SDs might be a bit submissive..and WANT the woman to rule him, regardless of the consequences.

  188. Background Checks- I’ve learned from expirence that keeping my first/last name off of the internet is important. Nobody gets my real name unless I feel comfortable with them having it.

  189. Nawty Molly says:

    My goodness!! Sounds like SDinLA needs a good spankin’!! 😀

  190. Va Gentleman says:


    ” I think its a combination of age, they are barely older than my oldest daughter—”

    Southern , I have a rule . None of my SBs can be younger than my youngest child ,who is 21 . I need a younger child but one I don’t need to pay support for . My horizons are waaaay too limited .

    Mentally/emotionally you must have a hangup . If you have ED then there are amazing techniques out there to fire up the ole joystick . See your friendly neighborhood Urologist . And I’m not only talking about Vit V . I have found that male libido is directly tied to the rigidity of his penis . A Shrink will not be of much good in overcoming psychologic reasons for impotence . This is a classic example of living better through chemistry .

  191. VanillaSugar says:

    @PrinceCharming Thank you so much :-)..I will do that. I hope you’re not 1 of the 16 who didn’t like it ***awkward* lol

  192. I’m in my late 20’s and Iget contacted by alot of single dads on the site.when they contact me, they usually say the same thing. They’re a career dad that can’t really get out and look because they are dedicated to work/children. Most of them tell me that they like my age because im not young enough to be their child,, but not old enough to be a nagging wife

  193. PrinceCharming says:

    @ VanillaSugar — sure, but no one else will be able to check out profile if you do. If you want to email it still, just search on the nickname “notafrog” and mail me, and I’ll get the profile line automagically.

    @grasshopper/all — I use a “burner phone” to borrow a phrase from the dark side, a pay-as-you-go cell, just because of nutcases, and do the same with email addresses and both have save me from crazy pot SBs. So using cell # for a background check isn’t going to work. What I did do with the SB I met here is on the second date, before it began, I handed her my laptop with a lot of relevant background info on me that documented I was who I said I was, and likely had a high income, etc all on separate tabs on FireFox, so she could flip pages and see the stuff without necessarily finding it on her own. I’m sure if the SB had a super good memory, it would be findable again, but doing it on the second date helped me preserve privacy, and gave her some sense of security and helped put her at ease, which definitely helped making the third date fun.

    (All my other SBs were through personal introductions, so both of us were already vouched for and none of this was needed, though I did have one IRL pot SB that wanted the “job” so bad she wouldn’t leave me alone on facebook and I wished I had a burner FB page lol.)

    @Southern_sdboo — I get where you’re coming from, the last SB was a big jump down in age for me and I felt a little creepy about it. I was 44, and she was 22 when we first met, but turned 23 very early in the arrangement, and there was a bit of “dirty old man” element, plus feeling a bit ridiculous going out on dates, however after a while there were a couple occassions I could tell she was actually very turned on, and I got over it.

    To be honest, the problem I’ve had is that the younger ones just aren’t all that good in bed; the two best SBs I’d had (all around) were 28 when we met, and about 34 when we parted. A year ago I had the last SB who was 23, and last summer I dated a 25yo (who I think wanted to be a SB without expressing it, and thought dating was how you got there) and honestly, both of the younger ones were pretty inhibited, it was kind of jarring for me, since my prior long-term SB was very uninhibited and we shared an in-joke that she “drew the line at animals.” So, _sdboo, could it perhaps be more a chemistry or experience thing, rather than age?

  194. NYG says:

    Grasshopper .

    Many guys may be 70-80 % give me their full first and last names, their job/foundation web sites , YouTube video links (2 were tv show hosts).
    And 95% my guys are married. I do not know my self why they e mail me this info (usually after phone conversation and e few short e mails). And the guys are usually exceptional , worldly known people, members of The Core club, have his amazing charities/foundations….
    and married…. I am surprised my self why they do not worry some crazy girl would tell his wife, or post something on line that would not be good for their reputation. ?

    DORKY knows one of my guys. I trust Dorky. If you think I am not sincere and not telling /writing all the truth I can e mail Dorky the list of their guys with their profile N, pictures and their job web sites.
    These guys are not naive , I do not know why they give the info… of course so I can trust and go out with him, so I can adore and admire him, coz often I tell/write “I am so honored to meet such an exceptional man….” . May be they want to brag … But they are risking their reputation …

    And Stormy mentioned he knows personally 3 SDs who got black mailed…..
    Grasshopper I don’t know.
    As I wrote before I used to give my real cell phone to pots, until one nice guy told me to google myself. there are a lot of info on me (including my salary, address, picture). and this guy told me to get a google voice. I did not know guys google girls profoundly … And after NC gent posts I made my FB account for friends only .
    why every guy who I even would not want to see second time after first coffee meeting need to know my salary; my parents, sister, kid picture…?
    So I am sensitive I do not want every guy and may be fake, freak SD google me. may be he does Not deserve to know me IRL.

  195. PhoneGuy says:

    You picked the wrong SD to reply to that question!
    😛 to SDinLA. 😉
    I get it. There are a lot of things saying something is not right. It seems too good to be true, society’s view on it, your daughter’s age, and not the least of which is that you give the young lady money. Never before sugar dating did I have to wonder if a chick I was trying to be intimate with was into me or not.

    All I can say is give it some time…your mind will either accept it or it won’t. If not, as Dorky said, change one of the variables (age) and see if that helps.

    Good luck.

  196. PhoneGuy says:

    @Mare, so what would this background check have revealed if you had gotten one with these bad SDs before you met them? Did they give you fake names? Fake ability to afford being an SD? Fake intentions? Are you worried they are convicted felons? What are you hoping to find in this report?

    I am a complete and total gentleman and I’m not doing a background check on myself for you.
    What a gentleman might do is try to find out your concerns and alleviate them if possible without sacrificing his privacy or well-being.

    >What’s the worst thing that can happen to her if I’m Charlie Manson? She gets up and leaves without drinking her coffee?
    Exactly! Every person you meet could be lying to you. Your prospective real estate agent, your prospective hairstylist. Are you ordering background checks on those people? No, you talk to the people, get to know them, maybe do your own research, trust your gut, extend them some trust, get burned or not and adjust…just like with every other person you deal with in your life.

  197. VanillaSugar says:

    Good Morning all!

    @PrinceCharming Thanks for responding. Is it ok if I email it to you?

    @Nwsugarbaby Yeah..I agree, quality is far more important than quantity..but neither is coming my way lol! But I’m remaining hopeful and patient :)

    @SDinLA [email protected] response to Southern_sdboo…I can’t stop laughing hahahahaha!

    @Southern_sdboo Is it that you’re not emotionally connected?

  198. DorkyGuy says:

    @SDinLA~ LOL! Who peed in your Wheaties this morning!

    @Southern_sd~ I am in a very similar situation. I am in my late 30’s, but I started my family young, so my oldest is 20. I don’t think it is possible for me to date that young and not see similarities. I am sure it’s something that can be overcome, but the connection would have to be just right. Just to keep conflicted feelings out of the equation, I try to look mainly at 28+. Why not try a SB out of your daughter’s age range?

  199. Southern_sd says:

    SDinLa……….. I take that as a NO then…..lol? I typed that on my phone hence the mistakes and fubared username Guru can IP check all day long no troll here.

    My ex of 6 years was 4 years my junior, I think its a combination of age, they are barely older than my oldest daughter, and mentally feeling like it isn’t real.

    I do love to see her laugh, see things happen in her life she never thought were as possible, and watch that genuine Omg when she experiences something new for the first time.

    We are meeting again next week maybe it will feel more natural.

  200. SDinLA says:

    @Nwsugarbaby, I think you need to teach sdboo’s SB about this “Butt nekkid except for the cowboy hat and boots/spurs thing. If that don’t work, his “equipment” must be broke.

    And tell me more about this “I’m a pyro” thing. I am intrigued.

    @Grassy Some people give out full info before meeting. As you wrote, I think that’s nuts for a SD and not a great idea for a SB either. I’m not married and still, the one time I used the site to set up some meets, I met with 6 pot SBs and I NEVER gave them even a full name. We did exchange cell #s in case of needing to notify of tardiness etc., but I used my google voice #. None of the women I met with seemed to have an issue with it and 4 of the 6 wanted to get into an arrangement at the end of the first meeting before they could have even used their phones to check any info I gave them during that meeting (So either I pick the easy girls or I am *that* irresistible 😉 Oh and of the other 2, one said “Not if you were the last man on earth, I’d pick Dorky before you, ew” with a look of disgust on her face, and the other one just ran screaming from the room.)

    Kidding aside, I know Midwest is a proponent of doing as much digging around as you can before meeting as are some SDs, and some SDs have said they have no problems with giving their full name, company name etc., so YMMV and all that but yeah, I’m not giving up a lifetime of protecting my privacy to a complete stranger from the internet before I meet her for coffee, to me that’s insane. What’s the worst thing that can happen to her if I’m Charlie Manson? She gets up and leaves without drinking her coffee? What’s the worst thing that could happen to a SD? Blackmail, identity theft… uh yeah, no way no how.

  201. SDinLA says:

    @Southern_sdboo Have you by any chance been fantasizing about other guys? (joke from earlier in the blog)

    :::squinting::: Hmm… not sure if serious…. Guru does this appear to be genuine or is it a recognized IP/email addy of a prior troll/sock puppet?

    The name makes me suspicious, what is a “sdboo” and why would a SD choose to use that? But *if* you are for real, I will say:

    I am in my mid 40s. My girlfriend is early 20s. All of my SBs were early 20s. Short answer to your question: Hellz no! Are you fricking kidding?!

    To quote writer Tom McGuane, “I like young girls. Their stories are shorter.”

    How do you know it’s specific to their age? Have you had sex with older women in between your last and current SBs with whom you did not have the same problems? Maybe you have an unrealized Granny fetish. What do you mean “weird physically?” As in you have been unable to perform? As you near 40, it could be prostate issues or something else health related that is making it hard for you to perform and not related to the age of your SB(s)

    Sex with an attractive female in her early 20s “doesn’t sit right with me on some emotional level?” WTF? Dude, if you’re a guy, you have testosterone, if she’s a hot young thing, where does emotional level come into the equation? Why would that affect performance? Maybe you’d get guilty after the fact but early 20s is not illegal in any country. This has to be a troll/sock, “emotional level?” FML that sounds like it was written by a woman, this is not passing the sniff test.

    SDinLA, liquored up like Captain jenniebug Morgan and BS detector set on high

  202. Southern_sdboo says:

    I have a question typed from my phone……lol. Has age ever made it wierd physically? I’m a pretty new SD enjoying the sugar world, but for me the physical component is hard…..as if that makes sense…lol. My current SB is early 20s and I am mid-late 30s and I just can’t do it. We talk, txt, joke, watch concerts, dinner, drinks, but beyond some cuddling it feels Idk different. She lives 6 hrs away, so we only see each other a weekend a month. We are more like food friends then anything else…….the thing is my last SB ended up being the same way. We were intimate, but it was still wierd to me. I’m starting to think as much as I like the idea of this the actual application of it doesn’t sit right with me on some emotional level I guess. Anyone ever feel that way?

  203. Grasshopper says:

    @everyone – @Mare brought up the background check thing. I have seen that subject posted on the blog a few times over the past few months. I can’t see how that can be done unless the pot voluntarily divulges their full name during those initial pre-meeting conversations – and who here does that?? I know I sure as hell never give out my full name or other vital info out to people I don’t know very well…so I can imagine that pot SDs would feel the same, if not more so; In theory, the SDs have way more to lose (e.g. community standing, etc…) if the pot SB turns out to be a nut bag. Sure, after a SB becomes closer to him over time, there’s no doubt that all (or at least MOST) of the SDs life will be revealed to the SB, and vice versa. But I just can’t imagine a pot SD being cool with a pot SB asking him for full disclosure concerning his last name, business name(s), home address, etc. Maybe the only way is by cellphone number? But then again, if that is the way it’s done, 99% of the pots still wouldn’t be able to do a background check on me, because I rarely give out my number. Feedback, please :)

  204. Nwsugarbaby says:

    @Tina thanks for the fill in. ive never heard of it before. i definitely listened to it on youtube. I enjoyed the story in the song about the horse with no name.

    @VanillaSugar-I’m studying and relaxing too. I’m newer to the site and blog. I’ve gotten lots of views, but i feel like quality is more important than quantity. Still looking for quality myself.

  205. Mare says:

    Yeah I was definitly naive when I joined. I fell for such a scam artist- so much so, he told me that 90 percent of people on this site are scammers and he was surprised I was who I said I was… little did I know he was one of them! Piece of advise for new commers- ALWAYS DO A BACKROUND CHECK and if you can’t afford it then ask him to provide you with one. If he is a true gentleman and SD he won’t think twice about it

  206. I think panties usually look better on the floor…lol

  207. PrinceCharming says:


    We need a profile number of the name the profile is under (I looked under VanillaSugar, nothing showing.)

  208. VanillaSugar says:

    Hello all! It’s Friday night and I’m home, bored, studying, wanting so badly to pop open this bottle of wine, but have to get up really early :(…Anyway, I would really appreciate it if someone could look at my profile for me and let me know what you think. I’ve been on here for about a month or so and my profile has only been viewed 25 times!!!!!! And not by 25 people, btw! So, if any of you experienced Sd’s/Sb’s don’t mind sharing some advice, please do :) Thanks!

  209. Tina says:

    @NWSugarbaby: there is actually a song titled “A Horse with No Name”. Google the first line of the chorus (“I’ve been through the desert on a horse with no name”) and you’ll see the lyrics.

    I have the damn thing stuck in my head now……….

  210. Nwsugarbaby says:

    @Jenniebug- you’ll have to let us know how your future chat with the broke hottie sign goes. Looks like you might ended up with a teaching a new sb opportunity.

    @Tina- I think if there was a song about the blog it would have to be a country song for there to be mention of a horse.

    @SDinLA-If you want to go real rodeo you have to get out and wear only the cowboy hat, cowboy boots, and spurs. The crops and whip are optional 😉 No matter how you do it, its got to be wilder than any 8 second ride. You could also use bailing twine instead of handcuffs. I better stop thinking about this…to many creative ideas….

    Red panties…redish is the color of fire and let’s face it im a pyro. I like wearing them red or other fun colors. Red with black is especially sexy.

    As a general note I really enjoy the blog community on here and how much more I have learned here than any other resource. You all are sugary sweet.

  211. Stormy, can I keep her? Pleaaaaaase?

  212. Tina says:

    Uh oh, jenniebug is plotting……this could be FUN! :)

  213. Actually stormy, I’m thinking more like shell be my partner in crime….

  214. Stormcat says:

    Hmmm . . . Seems my Jenniebaba is planning on giving birth tonight to a brand new SB. Guess that makes her a SM?

  215. Tina says:

    Wow, look at all I missed today: cross-dressing Tallywacking Phone Guy, Dorky having Rodeo Sex with broke hotties with signs on street corners, Grassy rubbing Tallywackers……and a horse with no name…….I think there’s a song about that…….. 😉

  216. Lmao, sure will… shes supposed to come over and hang out tonight. She seems awsome.

  217. DorkyGuy says:

    Jenniebug, please send me her profile number when she joins, so I can get a piece of that!

  218. So, I found the best candidate for our site today. She was standing outside, next to a homeless guy on the street corner. Her hair and nails were well done. She was holding up a sign…

    Rofl this is what it said…
    “Broke hottie wants free money. No, I’m not a hooker.”
    I asked her how much she made today… she said $350 by just standing there… lmao…I told her to become a sb.

  219. Stormcat says:

    Well I liked Brandon’s analogy of good apples vs bad apples compared to sugar. So I think and interesting new topic could be about the difference between experienced SDs/SBs and those new to the lifestyle using the analogy of the lifestyles of Old Money vs Neuvorich

  220. PrinceCharming says:

    @ NiaJ

    It takes time. Once real SDs find a workable arrangement they tend to stick with it, so they’re taken “off the market” so to speak. A year ago, it took me about two months to find the only SB I’ve had from this site (I’ve had others found IRL.), and even though it wasn’t the best arrangement, it lasted 4-5 months and then I took a break from being a SD for a while since my budget was hit more than planned. I’m sure it’s similar for other “real” SDs. So… be patient and make your profile as attractive as possible and decide if you want to try messaging SDs with attractive profiles to you.

    I do think the quality of both SBs and SDs has declined a little over the last couple years (mostly due to craigslist shutting down, some of them coming here) but there certainly appears to me to be plenty of “real” sugars still here.

  221. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    I totally agree Capt J. This blog topic has covered it all. I suggest tips on how to find a good sugar momma. :-)

  222. Hmm… Is it just me or does it seem like there should be a new blog topic by now?

  223. Nia J says:

    I just joined SA and sadly nothing promising so far. I thought most novice SBs experienced a bit of beginners luck. Most of the pots have turned out to be pic collectors and flakes so as you can imagine, I’m feeling a bit discouraged. I wonder if there are more bad apples left on the site than there are good?

  224. Grasshopper says:

    ::scratches Mr. Tallywhackers tummy:: haha..I love how his leg goes crazy when I do that!

  225. SDinLA says:

    Gah, I think it’s time to head off blog for the weekend. Hope everyone is having a wonderful Friday and has a great weekend.

  226. Mr. Tallywhacker says:

    Woof woof woof! Woof! Woof woof! *pant pant pant*

  227. DorkyGuy says:

    @SDinLA~ LOL @ Mr. T!

    “Mr. Tallywhacker, play dead. Good boy.”

  228. SDinLA's horse says:

    @SDinLA I do need a name, you know?

  229. SDinLA says:

    “What’s your dog’s name?”
    “Mr. T.”
    “Oh, like from that A-Team TV show?”
    “No, actually it’s short for Mr. Tallywhacker.”

    “Here Mr. Tallywacker…. Sit, Mr. Tallywhacker… Bad Mr. Tallywhacker, bad bad Mr. Tallywhacker.”


  230. SDinLA says:

    @Dorky and Grassy OMG, my next dog is SO gonna be named “Mr. Tallywhacker” tat’s an effing brilliant pet name (not for your penis though, that’s a bit obvious.)

    Hmmm…. Spot *is* in rehab for another 3 plus weeks….

  231. DorkyGuy says:

    @babydoll~ regarding the vibrating chess set… I am not exactly sure how I would react if I visited my SB and found 32 vibrators posed on a table. I guess I would have to assume that she had 31 fun girlfriends!

  232. SDinLA says:

    @Dorky and Grassy I actually know someone whose 3-decade older hubby expired of a heart attack in flagrante delicto. It may have been a hell of a way for him to go, but the police investigation, media scrutiny and notoriety were no fun for her. I wouldn’t wish that on my significant other. Seems kinda selfish since you won’t be around to deal with the aftermath.

  233. Grasshopper says:

    Poor Mr. Tallywhacker ::mourns::

  234. SDinLA says:

    Old McDorky had rodeo sex, E I E I O
    With a buck buck here and a buck buck there
    Here a buck, there a buck
    Everywhere a buck buck

    @Dorky I don’t know how this stuff gets started either but doesn’t it bother you that PhoneGuy has been fantasizing about you? Or are you comfortable with your sexuality??

    Re: rodeo sex, yeah but I’m OCD and your methods require sleeping with a sibling first. Maybe I’ll try a cattle prod or taser instead.

    @babydoll I’ll throw in the vibrator chess set, also very lightly used, if you take the red lingerie and the vibrating panties off my hands, NYG doesn’t like red lingerie. Come on, your SD will love it!

  235. DorkyGuy says:

    “Here lies Mr. Tallywhacker. He died while orgasming. He didn’t know if he was coming or going.”

  236. Grasshopper says:

    @Dorky – Nah, dude..he just might have a heart attack and die right then and there. The Coroner’s report would say he died of a deadly mixture of orgasm and shock.
    On a positive note, though, death while orgasming HAS to be one of the best ways to kick the bucket.

  237. DorkyGuy says:

    LOL! Or better yet, Grasshopper, just as he’s about to come, she tells him she forgot her pill

  238. Grasshopper says:

    @Dorky – Re: RODEO SEX — Yeah..there’s a version of that for the women…It’s when the woman is on the guy in the cowgirl position..and right when she’s about to orgasm, she tells the guy that he’s almost as good as his brother (or best friend – if he doesn’t have any brothers..heh). Then she tries to stay on for as long as she can before he bucks her off.
    That’s SO hawt ;P

  239. babydoll says:

    reading all these , SdinLA ,Dorky ,Phoneguy~ haha!!! i dont know bloody hell you all make me laugh with all your escapades xxxx

    @NYG~i love burgundy and aubergine colours too!!!

    Dear Sd’s,

    Can you all please go back to looking for Sb’s ??? omg sd wearing lingerie?? hahaha
    sd with men fetish?? hahaha

  240. DorkyGuy says:

    @SDinLA/PhoneGuy~ I read it on the internet, so it must be true

  241. DorkyGuy says:

    @SDinLA~ The prerequisite for pulling off a successful Rodeo is to have actually done her sister first. Otherwise, the delivery will be half-hearted, resulting in substandard bucking. And I could really use a good buck 😛

  242. SDinLA says:

    @Dorky and PhoneGuy Wait, it’s only a rumour? I thought it had been established as fact…

  243. SDinLA says:

    @Dorky What if she’s an only child or has only brothers? That would be like when the gate opens and the steer/bronc just stands there.

  244. DorkyGuy says:

    @Anna~ Rodeo sex… (cover your eyes kids)… The guy enters from behind, and as he is just about to reach completion, he grabs firmly onto her hips, and tells her that she is almost as good as her sister. He then tries to hang on for 8 seconds without being dismounted 😛

    It is almost as fun as The Admiral!

    @PhoneGuy~ It is!

  245. PhoneGuy says:


    See, that’s how rumors get started. 😛

  246. NYG says:


    I am going to read your new script and decide if I iron your Brioni on you, or get you out of it first. :)

    (and seriously … Most of the guys say they prefer red lingerie, and the rest like black ;

    Oh… May be one day I will come cross a guy who has same taste – I like burgundy , wine color…. shades of purple )

  247. Anna Molly says:

    Is that your normal DG? Wow! Sounds like fun! 😉

  248. DorkyGuy says:

    Rodeo sex 😉

  249. Anna Molly says:

    Good to see ya DG! Are you staying out of trouble? 😉

    What is normal anyway? 😀

  250. DorkyGuy says:

    ‘morning Anna…

    Between SDinLA cross-dressing and PhoneGuy fantasizing about guys, it is no surprise that the girls are having trouble finding normal men!

  251. Anna Molly says:

    Good morning everyone! I hope all of you have fun weekends planned! 😀

    All of you have been so busy!! I have some major catching up to do! :)

  252. SDinLA says:

    Note to self: Panties OVER garters, panties OVER garters dang it.

  253. SDinLA says:

    @Student Baby J…. O RLY? :::sits down across from Student Baby J and crosses legs:::

  254. Student Baby J says:

    @SDinLA – I’d honestly consider a relationship with an SD w a cross-dressing fetish as I think it would be much better than all the super dominant SDs clogging up the site. But thats a different topic altogether lol.

  255. SDinLA says:

    P.S. @everyone Anyone want some really nice red Agent Provocateur bra/panties? Demi-cup and the panties have a thong back. Matching garters and hose too. Hardly worn and in excellent condition (I found it uncomfortable to wear under a suit and the red clashed with all of my stuff anyway. Plus when I would cross my legs to give a “flash” of red pantyhose at the ankles as a signal, the women always seemed to end the date prematurely for some reason.)

    I have some vibrating panties for sale too. Spare batteries included. I can throw in a laser pointer if that helps close the deal.

    @NYG You can iron my Brioni suit if you can get me out of it first. 😉

  256. SDinLA says:

    @Student Baby J, “IRL” = “In Red Lingerie” It’s kind of a SD/SB world “secret handshake.” If you meet someone and they are in red lingerie, for the men that tells us you’re a potential SB, and for the women that tells you the guy’s a cross-dresser/one kinky bastard. 😉

    Or maybe IRL = “In real life” and I was looking way too hard for women in red lingerie.

  257. Student Baby J says:

    Everyone – what is “IRL?”

    @VaGentleman – I don’t limit by age at all, in fact I don’t take anyone under 50 seriously. It’s not me, they don’t ask me on a second date. I dress nicely (read tasteful but with a push up bra lol), and I try to be extra pleasant. I don’t put this much effort into dating guys my age and I don’t have any trouble attracting them or getting them to like me. I’ll keep kissing frogs I guess lol.

    @SouthernGent2 – I’m in NYC.

    I’m learning these guys want the opposite of what they say… They say they don’t want pros buttey insist on per session arrangements; they say they want smart but they’re intimidated by a grad degree; they say they want no drama but of the pots I’ve gone out with like 4 have had war stories of their previous basket case SBs.

    But if you guys know of any SDs interested in a smart, loyal, (and yes, super frisky) SB in NYC please please let me know lol.

  258. PrinceCharming says:


    Real speed dating you don’t put your stuff out there, it’s just like the high points of a regular first date put into 3-5 minutes. Pretty much the only thing you can find out is if you hit it off right away.

    Our way is better, we find out what everyone’s needs and must-haves are before jumping in.

    Weeding, I am :D. The bad SB was only one, I’ve had two other multiyear arrangements that were absolutely wonderful.

  259. redheadSB says:


    Yeah, I have never been speed dating but my general impression is that you put most your stuff out there (work, kids, marriage, etc)….we are just doing it on a….deeper?….level. I’m sorry about your SB. I guess the kind of “ultimate” SD/SB relationship that everyone is looking for takes time…at least those of us who have been here before know that. Gotta weed through the fakes, foes, and creepos :-)

  260. Tina says:

    Sorry Dorky, you only get 1 beautiful lady on your island, since Phone Guy is Mary Ann…..hehehehe……

  261. DorkyGuy says:

    Re: Survivor Sugar Island: Yup, You nailed me (figuratively). I would have been voted off first, primarily for those reasons. I can see me trying to defend myself. “But I can write some cool web addin that will help us win.” “We’re on an island with no computers, you idiot”

    By the way, if meg allowed the script to be rewritten to Guru’s taste, wouldn’t that be rewarding Guru’s bad behavior?

  262. babydoll says:

    @VAGent~ i want you to know you can ask anything and i am happy to answer them x

    I love hearing your story because it is so sweet and fairy tale ish. I’m happy for the two of you . I am going through the same thing and loving it —but also wondering how far to go in discussing these feelings with her without scaring her off .

    Your story is in direct opposition to the greed that rears its ugly head here from time to time .

    ~this is an interesting question,how far should you go in discussing your feelings without scaring her off?

    *i felt the same way before i admitted i was inlove.but he made me say it in such a way that i didnt realize what he had done!
    i knew he was inlove with me,but i know better than assuming something that he never confirmed,even if its staring me in the eye.
    when i finally said it,’i think i have fallen inlove with you’ apparently i made him very happy he didnt stop smiling and he felt like ‘heaven’
    what he didnt know was what i felt when he replied to me ‘i feel the same way and i love you,to me you are everything’

    but the question you need to ask yourself before jumping at this,is,
    ‘will i be able to accept what her reply would be?’
    and its important that you leave a lot of room for her to think about things if she doesnt reply to what you expect her to reply regaring your feelings.
    one thing i noticed with my Sd is,whatever he was doing for me,or how he treats me,he never seem to expect me to behave the same way he treats me,and for a hwile i also noticed,if he wants to be with me and i cant the onyl thing he would say are assurances that its no bother,we will find a way,we will muddle through or we will work arund your schedule.there wasnt any neagtive response from him all the time.
    in this way,i felt that he was very giving and he doesnt mind sacrificing his feelings jus tfor me to have ‘my way’.
    are you this type of person?
    how long have you been with your Sb? if you have been with her for a while,i am sure she knows how you feel for her.
    but do you think she feels the same way towards you?
    if its easy for you to make her feel she is the most important thing in your life aside from your family,then invest in that.
    when you tell her how you feel dont make her feel pressured to answer you as well,and whatever her answer is,be man enough to accept it with no offence.wether she answers negatively,remember that is not very easy to admit for she would know she will hurt your feelings,but be thankful that she told you the truth and then you know how to deal with yours.

    i dont know how your communication is with your Sb,but with us,there is nothing we cant talk about,there is no taboo subject.the only thing that stops us from being hurtful now with each other is mutual respect,we know when not to say things.
    but if you havent revealed how you feel for her,all i can say is,be ready,be open,be accepting.
    one thing i can say is,my Sd has spoiled me a lot emotionally,so its my job to keep myself on the ground for me not to go away with the fairies :)

    and please whatever you have invested in her,whatever her answer is,dont take it against her.

    but if she reveals she feels the same way as you,then make sure you value it and then again,
    you would knwo how to move forward.
    dont make any empty promises,be honest with what you can give her,time wise,emotionally and maybe financially.
    dont take advantage of it,remember,it doesnt change that you have a responsibility to her as her Sd.even if you know she has fallen inlove with you.

    i have nothing against NSA or any other Sugar arrangements,but we are all humans.and to be honest,love is in everything~everywhere.its in all shapes and form.
    to find it in Sugarbowl makes it all the more special.and it only shows it still exist.

    my relationship with my Sd is somewhat fairytale-ish as you said,but we let it run its natural course and it led to what we have now,but it could have led to a different direction as well.
    but luck played a big part too,as we both found in each other what most people wanted in this crazy,over rated,money oriented Sugarbowl world.

    good luck and i hope it all works well… if it doesnt,i am sure there are a lot of Sb’s waiting in the wings for you!!! 😉

  263. Va Gentleman says:


    ” did you just message every SB that looked remotely interesting based on the profile ”

    Yes -pretty much . Before I found my SB I would be very picky and just email a few interesting looking ones. When I did not get many returns I sent emails to every single one who did not have a disgusting profile/picture . Many of these girls either did not respond at all ,or responded days/weeks after I contacted them. I figured that at least I could work with a few that I heard from . I ended up getting about 12 answers and saw a couple that did not work out . My baby did respond quickly and it turned out to be magic .

    The point of the story is to be persistant.

  264. Grasshopper says:

    Grasshopper = Prima Donna Assoluta!

  265. PrinceCharming says:

    @VA Gentleman

    When you say general sweep, did you just message every SB that looked remotely interesting based on the profile, asked for more info or ??? How slim were the pickings?

    In my area (AZ) activity isn’t great, about 200 profiles active in the past month that meet my loosest criteria, and only about 35 that match a pretty loose wish list, and a quarter of those are actually escorts marketing.

  266. SDinLA says:

    Buncha prima donnas, the lot of you. This is why I stay away from entertainment projects, you can never keep everyone happy.

    @Guru, it wouldn’t be a “shocking upset” if you won ever NRBB challenge, would it? Sometimes you gotta have artistic license to give the audience what they need.

    I’m surprised Dutch Girl didn’t complain”Even though I won, I thought you could have made my character more sympathetic, and showed off my body more with some bikini scenes- I worked damned hard to get in this shape!”

    Dorky got voted off first and he’s not complaining (probably because he knows he WOULD be voted off first for exactly the reasons I wrote.)

    After “Real SBs of NYC” we could do “Jersey Shore: Sugar World Edition” Any volunteers to be Snooki and The Situation?

    Or maybe “Sugar Daddy Apprentice” with Brandon taking the Trump role and earnest SDs vying to win the prize of a job with SA.com

  267. Va Gentleman says:

    @ babydoll

    Your posts came through ! Yay !

    I love hearing your story because it is so sweet and fairy tale ish. I’m happy for the two of you . I am going through the same thing and loving it —but also wondering how far to go in discussing these feelings with her without scaring her off .

    Your story is in direct opposition to the greed that rears its ugly head here from time to time .

  268. babydoll says:

    @VAGent~answers to question 3.

    3) are you monogamous or does he have sex with his wife and you with other bfs ?

    ~this actually made me smile when i read this question.
    if i asked you now,and you are married to someone else with an Sb is that monogamous or polygamous?
    the answer to your question depends on how the individual see their relationship wether Sugar or IRL.
    am i interested to know if my Darling Sd is still having sexual relationship with his estranged wife? i sure dont! haha
    or other women? no way!
    when i met my Sd i had a long running reltionship wiht my fiancee and stopped having sex for 2 years this is one reason why i had to have break from it.it was my fiancee who just stopped not me.and i am not a hypocrite to say any longer than it was fine becasue i wasnt,plus all the other things that piled up in the end i just had to let go.
    so before my Sd i wasnt having any sex with any other man,and i have aproblem with disloyalty.with my Sd,i didnt have to say it,he knew it straight away.
    one good thing is i am a woman and we are naturally ‘jelaous’ creatures,but i know how to bite my tongue when i feel it.i will cry my eyes out,i go quiet,i pace the floor,but i wont say anything to accuse because that is unfair i think.so for ex: last night my Sd said he will be out.i just replied,
    ‘enjoy your evening’,i dont ask where or with who,but i feel maybe at some point he is with another woman,he knew it straight away and diffuses it->with humor,’darling i am with the anarchists plotting the next riot ;)’ haha 😛
    so thats how it goes.at the end of the evening however late he would mesage me that he is home and would i like to go to bed now?
    and this is one thing as well that i dont feel entitled to know,however good he is to me,i still feel he has a life,and he needs space as well as any other bloke.
    on our 6th month talk this came up in our conversation,he never stop me to date other men,he feels that if i meet any one who will make me happy and lead to marriage he feels that what he cant give me,someone else might.and it has always been like that from the beginning.and the only thing i asked is was he looking for another Sb?the answer was NO.
    how many gf does he have? the answer was :Only You.
    what i ddint know was through the course of the evening he thought i was asking him if he was looking for another Sb was because i was looking for another Sd on top of him.:P
    So the next day,he asked me if i was looking for another Sd ?was it because he dont provide enough for me?thas the only time i saw sadness in his eyes,so i said i wasnt looking and he is providing enough and ,yes,i do love him.
    FYI~we are like teenagers together,we enjoy each others company when physically together or not,how we communicate is just incredible.and if he was having anything with anther woman with his wife or not,thats his decision to take not mine.
    but yes,i would like to believe that we are monogamous.the last talk we had over valentines weekend,his thoughts were,if he wanted a Sugarbaby,he would stay with me,he felt he wont be able to find another one with what he has with me.re IRL gf,the answer was the same.he would be happy to carry on with me as we dont really feel anymore that we are in a Sugar relationship.
    we have already crossed the line.but what makes it Sugar is that he still provides fo me financially.but now it is also,emotionally.
    like he said,what is the difference of me being his Sugarbaby or his gf/wife?
    actually NONE.
    dont get me wrong,i am jealous,i analize everything,i cry,i get upset,i sometimes have tantrums,
    i sometimes bitch about things,i love shopping,i talk a lot(like what you are finding out now)
    i am over emotional,over romantic~ for short i am not perfect.
    but the thing is,it doesnt matter because my Sd wont change me for anything in the world 😉
    so my dear VAGent,you have a lot of reading to do tonight!!! 😉
    i hope i made sense and it will help you in some way in making your woman a bit happier …
    a single rose will always go far ! hahaha

    @ NYG~ thank you, i decided i post them one by one! its evening time in London now.
    re SdinLa plots~thats ok,i dont mind,i hope you all enjoy it!!! happy plotting xxxx

  269. PhoneGuy says:

    I think we can sell that script to Jeff. But I’d want a re-write because nobody beats me in a “NRBB” challenge!!
    I lose in round one of this challenge btw. 😉

  270. PrinceCharming says:


    It’s a different kind of speed dating, we get to skip past 3-6 dates of pleasantries and pretending and go straight to talking about what we want/need on date zero, which is what makes arrangements sooo much better regular dating.

    As far as screening, I really don’t think there’s a way to do it centrally, and even then it can miss stuff. The SB I had issues with passed a background check, but I found out after the breakup her arrest record had been suppressed due to an ongoing investigation. Ultimately I think you have to go with how it feels, and how the person treats you once you start something.

  271. Va Gentleman says:


    ” how many SBs here contact SDs and how many SDs respond to this. ”

    I found my SB . None of the SBs who contacted me were interesting to me . There were so few great looking profiles in my area I just contacted my SB as a general sweet through a lot of profiles just to see who popped up . Her picture was terrible but her write up was cute. As it turned out she was perfect for me and much cuter than her picture .

    I would be open to a pot SB contacting me .

  272. babydoll says:

    @VAGent~heres my answer for question 2.

    2) do you talk about a future together ? And if so in what capacity ? Divorce , continue as is together ?
    ~i got a bit of help from my Darling Sd here hehe 😉
    from the onset,i was the one who was ‘practical’ about things.he was the more ’emotional’ about it.
    i remember the second timewe spent the night together,it was a whole weekend,on the last day,he wont leave until we have ‘spoken’ i knew he had fallen inlove,but i didnt say anything.
    but the words he said,said it all. ‘i dont want to go,i want us to stay another night,i enjoy all our time together and i feel happy being with you’
    still i was the one who insisted,we should go,he needs to carry on his life and i am just here when he wants but i want us to stick to our agreement.i said that becasue i was ‘afraid’ to let my feelings show too early on.although by this time we have been together 3 months.
    but when he speak about ‘us’ it was always,’we’,’us’,together”our journey”our plans’
    so as early on he made his feelings clear.one reason i fell inlove with him.
    i would like to believe yes,we speak of it,as how he says things to me all the time.
    the crunch time came on the hallowwen weekend,he had to be outside of London and in London.
    but the whole time we always message each other,when i say always it means all the time literally.you see,he is VERY romantic.
    this is the weekend we spoke of our LOVE for each other,his words were,i am happy we said how we feel out in the open,at the moment you are everything to me,i want to give all that i have and more.
    he wants to take care of me in the capacity he can,he wants this year to be successful because of me,to get me a place in future,plans for what we are going to do together,he plans them a month ahead,if things change its not because we want to change them but more so because of circumstances like work etc.how he will provide for me and how he will be able to make me happier.
    at the moment all the things he wants us to do are a long list of things,but wether they will be all fulfilled,we take each day as they come :) but like he said more than once,he see a good future and he see me in it.but take note~it is easier to provide anything to someone you actually love,than someone you dont 😉
    and its easier for me to accept what he wants to give because i love him.
    i turned down a lucrative television offer,BBC wants to follow me and 3 other Sb’s for a reality show,my Sd was excited for me,until i learned how they want to portray Sb’s,gold digging,selfish,
    having multiple partners and lazy.
    thats not me at all.
    i had to turned them down twice,i was more worried of my relationship with my Sd and my family than that! My Sd is involved in the film world and he knows how the media will portray me,so we both sat down and he said if you are unhappy this is not the project for you and there will always other opportunities.but for him he is more worreid about me than himself.

    re divorce~any married man whatever their circumstances are,have the capability to decide on their own if they want a divirce or not.i surely dont influence him in any way to go that direcion,although in the beginning he mentioned because of his belief in marriage he was not thinking of divorcing his wife of 10 years.even if they live separate lives,whatever his reasons,i respect them and wont question them.i knew from the start he is married to someone else,
    and i acceped that.was i upset even now we have fallen inlove? NO.

    i may not be in the first place,but he made sure i have the best place in his life.
    was i worried about his life with any one else? NO
    our life is is separate from everything else aside from my son.
    when we started,we started as US,not THEM.
    i know when he wakes up its me he looks for,during the day we message each other endlessly,
    i am the person he wants at the end of the night even if we dont live together.
    if i want him he is always just a message away.even if he has clients and busy at work if i need him,he would always answer me.he never disappeared once since we started this arrangement.
    we both feel that we are beyond Sugar now,but we keep it this way more for me than him.
    so,the future is the future,we dont know what lays ahead,i planned my future differently but now i am here.
    do i regret being the other woman?NO.i was very lucky he wanted me actually.i dont feel entitled to anything other than what he gives me,i sure dont feel entitled to question divorce,pressure him with his time,love me even more.i let him do all and realize what he really wants from me.
    i didnt even put a price on me,he made an offer and explained his circumstances,he is not a millionnaire but he has a good job and he works really hard, i accepted it more because of how honest he was more than anything else.
    he decides most of the things we do together,but he still feel we are equal.i let him decide and i trust his decisions.
    and i am not looking for marriage as i hav ebeen married once when i was very young and it was terribel i never thought i will again.
    if one day he leaves i told him,anytime your feelings change,all you need to do is tell me.dont stay unhappy with me :)
    if it all ends tomorrow,i want it all to be happ memories,we both have positive outlook about life,
    and thats the way i want it to end.
    he said the secret to us being happy together,inspite of all that surrounds us are these things:
    trust,honesty,respect,good sex 😉 a lot of care for each other and luck that led us to LOVE :)
    his answer to future~he said wether this relatiionship goes where we want it to go or not,
    in 20 years time he wants to know that our lives are still entwined in some way.

    @dorky~yeah i thought about that! thank you :) i hope all is well with you and your Sb xxx

    @SdGuru~thank you now i know better! xxx

  273. redheadSB says:

    I agree with there being “bad apples” as far as SB’s too. We are all just trying to truly connect with someone who has what we are looking for..kinda reminds me of speed dating. lol. There should be some kind of screening process….but how to really do that? It would be very difficult and a process that some wouldn’t want to go through. So we all have to screen for ourselves and I think that’s where some frustration with bad apples comes into play. A good arrangement won’t fall in my lap but I’m getting to know a LOT about men along the way 😉

  274. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    Hello sbs and sds!!! How is everyone today? Just popping in to say hello between W2s, 1099s and all that other rubish.

  275. DorkyGuy says:

    @babydoll~ a tip… When writing a long post, try writing it in NotePad, then copy/paste it into the blog. That way, if the post fails, you don’t have to retype everything. Just copy and paste it back from NotePad into the blog.

  276. babydoll says:

    ok i will try to post again … phew 😛

    @VAGent~this is he fourth time i am trying to reply to your questions sorry thye are abit delayed but i will try to answer one question at a time and see if its going to show here…
    they are very long answers and may bore you to death haha!!

    Three really personal questions if I may ?

    1) do you talk about his wife and family at all ?

    ~like i said, i never had the courage to ask him about his wife until just very recently,when we first met i was with someone else as well,so it was actually a ‘perfect’ set up if you may call it that.
    i wasnt someoen who ask a lot of questions anyway,and i didnt want to be asked about mine too at that stage.BUT,on our first meet,he asked me over dinner what my fiancee does as a living,where he is from (he is English) and how old he was.Well,to be honest my fiancee then is older than my Sd and has led a more colourful life!
    Anyway,after ianswered his questions, i asked him where his wife was from.He apologised straight away and said,’i am really sorry to ask,i shouldnt have’ so,i understood from that time on,that it is a no go area for me.
    We have committed ourselves from the moment we met to six months,then review if we still want to carry on or separate,that 6 months was last January of this year.But through the course of these months,i had problems with my finacee running for two years and had to decide to give my self a break from that relationship,in november.
    But at this time me and my Sd had already fallen inlove,but it has nothing to do with me breaking my relationship with my fiancee.
    in january before we spoke about the arrangement we have,i was so nervous but had the courage to ask about his wife,as he said to me that evening,i have nothing to worry about as he loves,he is hapy to take care of me and still want to carry on his life with me.
    so the question about his wife arose, ‘what does your wife think about us?’ he said,they have been living separate lives…but that is another story to tell 😉
    but he said to me that our life together he is happy to protect.
    re his family~yes,he tells me what goes on and at the moment i am giving emotional support as much as he would let me.i dont ever ask or push him to tell me anything unless i know it is affecting him a lot,i wan to be the one to make him happy even if he already has it from somewhere else … and this contributed a lot to him opening up to me more than before.
    my Sd was raised a Scottish man and he guards his emotions securely,he is a provider,problem solver,the one who would ‘take care of things’ and he feels that he will let me down if i will be sad because of his personal life. but i told him,he can ell me whatever he wants,what he has in his heart and his mind and i am here to listen.
    i think,communication is key,for him,i can ask him anything and he would always answer me the best he can,so i want t give it back to him.but never pressure someoen to speak about things that would make the person uncomfy.it takes a lot of time and trust to make this happen,but when it does it means that the relationship had gone another level :)

    so,will answer the other two later and see if this post goes through :)

  277. DorkyGuy says:

    I am thinking of adding to my profile:

    Must be comfortable with me addressing you as ‘My Precious’

  278. NYG says:

    Good morning Babydoll.

    SORRY you have troubles with the blog’ post. I am sure VA is waiting for your answers to him coz your answers r always intelligent . you can e mail Guru (his e mail in his blog accessible to public, and he can e mail you other bloggers e mails). and

    SORRY SDinLA did not include you in his Epic post; you just will have to fly to NY while we are filming “The real SBs of NYC” and be a guess star. :) would you?

  279. babydoll says:

    what th eheck is going on on this blog? my posts keeps disappearing?!

    bloggods can you please be good enough to send @VAGentleman my email of babydoll that i use for this blog?

    @VAGentleman~frustrating to reply and have posts not show!!! please just get my babydoll email from th eblog gods and i will be happy to reply to you through email.

    @Dorky~ this is the third time i am posting this as my posts dont show here! Well, i think i am the lucky one that my Sd wants me and chose me :) he deserves more of what i can give him and more…

    @NYG~ ok i have to say it again,essence of a woman is her sexuality,that is in my opinion anyway :)
    there is nothing more sexy than a woman who knows what she can give and what she wants in this part,of any relationship,wethere an arrangement or IRL.there is nothing to be ashamed to admit that you are confident in yourself that you can satisfy he man you want and be satisfied in return :)

  280. SouthernGent2 says:

    Is there an air of deception lingering in here from yesterday?

  281. babydoll says:

    hello again everybody its a warm thursday today in London xxx

    well since i lost my other blog from yesterday here,

    @VA Gentleman~ i am happy to reply to your questions from a few days back,well i did but it didnt show here on SA. to save any frustraions please email me at

    i think it will be easier for me to write there,the blog is so busy it cant accommodate some write ups here they disappear!!!

    looking forward to hear from you :)))

    @dorkyguy~ well i think i am actually the lucky one,thats becasue my Sd found me and wanted me :) he deserves a lot of what i givehim and more xxxx

    @NYG~ i think thta the essence of being a woman has a lot to do with our sexuality,
    there is nothing wrong in making peace with yourself and use it positively to make you happier in that part of your life :)
    being sexy and knowing what you can give and what you can have are very positive things about a woman. i dont think for one minute that i am taken advntage of if my man wants something to do in bed rather than the ‘normal’ stuff that couples do.
    but obviously i trust him a lot,i am not worried that things will be taken out of context,but rather
    having some one enjoy ‘me’ and he is confident enough that i cando it for him xxx

  282. Michael Alleycat says:

    @SDinLA – epic post, I think we should start a SugarSurvivor game in real life. The ‘sex with stilettos on’ challenge certainly could be interesting.

    And the outback survival skills would definitely come in handy – a bit of ‘roo hunting, bring a meal back to the tribe.

  283. babydoll says:

    Aw blog gods my blog didn’t show here fr yesterday it was too long
    it got lost? :(

  284. Dutch Girl In London says:

    @SDinLA Ha I won, I like your strategy!

  285. LASB says:

    Hi Beach! [waving and smiling]

  286. LASB says:

    Hi Trisha! Not sure I’ve seen you before, so if not, welcome to the blog. On the right hand side at the top of this page is a column of past blogs with the heading, “Sugar Daddy Dating Tips.” On it, you will see a link called, “Profile Tips.” I recommend giving that a read, and it will help you figure out what to put or not put in your profile.

    To any SB asking for general profile advice, avoid mentioning the word “drama” in any form, including saying “no drama” or “drama-free.” Instead, try turning it into a positive, such as “I’m fun and easy going” or “I’m respectful, polite, and easy to get along with.” Actually, I would say to eliminate anything on your profile that could be construed as negative. Try to say it in the positive when possible. Think of it on the flipside. If you read a guy’s profile that says “If you are an entitled princess biotch, don’t bother writing me,” even though you are not one, you probably won’t write him because of the negative energy that emanates.

    In terms of whether to make first contact or not, I think it’s ok in most cases. Many pots I’ve met were ones in which I wrote first. In asking about that, each said that they get so much mail that they never bother writing to anyone first. They’d rather sit back and see what comes in.

  287. DorkyGuy says:

    @SDinLA~ Your Survivor script is pure genius! Your sense of humor sir is as large as Mount Rushmore!

  288. DorkyGuy says:

    @PhoneGuy/SG2/PrinceCharming~ I agree with Prince Charming on this one. SG2, it’s not surprising that you received flaky 3 approaches when you made your profile visible. I would love to hear other guys’ #s on this, but in my case about 19 in 20 were either not my type, appeared to be spam, or disqualified for something in their profile text.

    Still, that 1 in 20 that I really liked was often someone I wouldn’t have considered on my own. My fondest was younger than my age range, and outside my geography, so I never would have approached her on my own. I am very glad that she approached me, and also very glad that my profile was open so that she could do so..

  289. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars!

    Hope everyone had a great day!!! 😀

    SDinLA nice to see you back here, it’s been a while!

    LASB~ Hey girl!

    Hi Everyone!

  290. PhoneGuy says:

    @jenniebug & SC, Congrats! where are you two registered? 😉

    @Dorky, Awww, I wanted to be the Professor. If Meg can be the Professor, then I’ll be Mary Ann. 😉

    Pot #1 said, “I do ok but I’m not a millionaire or anything.
    @LASB, I dunno, that is how I describe myself. As long as I can afford the amount I promise them each month, I’m good.

    @SDinLA, sweet! I had a good run.

    @Everyone, I love SBs contacting me. The large majority of ones that contact me are not my type but that is fine.

    • SD Guru says:

      jenniebug & SC, Congrats! where are you two registered?

      Little did I know when I wrote this comment a month ago it would lead to holy matrimony… snif, snif… 😉

      In a shocking immunity challenge upset, Meg beats Guru in a 4-hour battle of “Not Rewarding Bad Behavior” and the Guru is eliminated…

      I think we can sell that script to Jeff. But I’d want a re-write because nobody beats me in a “NRBB” challenge!! :mrgreen:

  291. PrinceCharming says:

    @SouthernGent Ah yes, I know they type you’re mentioning, they email right away, but that tends to drop off pretty quickly. Discounting “those” girls (tineye and google image search are helpful screening, lol) I still appreciate the interest, and being in my mid-40s I don’t want to be too creepy around the women in their low 20s, even if I find them interesting. It’s nice to let them come to me, but perhaps I should get over that self-filtering. That’s another thing I’d like to hear from the SBs about.

  292. Tina says:

    Thoughts and prayers to all affected by the tornadoes this morning…….holy cow……

  293. Tina says:

    @SDinLA: there ya go, start selling those tickets for the “Golf Ball Sucking through a Hose in Stilettos” contest! :)

  294. Grasshopper says:

    @Tina – absolutely

  295. Tina says:

    @Grassy: stilettos would be a requirement for a sold out show of hose sucking, dontcha think?

  296. Grasshopper says:

    @Tina – I’m 5’7″. Looks like the playing field would be level, height-wise — with or without stilettos on 😉

  297. SouthernGent2 says:

    Sorry for the terrible post. I am distracted by thunder and lightning outside right now. My profile is back to hidden. I feel the way to success on this site is for us men to pursue the sb’s. The sb’s need to do a good job of marketing themselves on their profiles. So many bad profiles out there with terrible pictures.

  298. LASB says:

    Jenniebug – Safe travels!! :)

  299. SouthernGent2 says:

    @PrinceCharming and Dorky – I made my profile visible for a few hours two weeks ago. I have no picture for discretion reasons. I rec’d three messages from type girls that I would never even consider talking to.

    Simple principle here is that the SD makes the choices in whom he messages, SD makes the presentation and offer, SB accepts or rejects.

  300. LASB says:

    SDinLA – Hi Neighbor! Pot #1 said “I tried Match and the women aren’t good looking.” Pot #2 said “I like dating women 30 years younger than me, and this is the only way.” Pot #1 said, “I do ok but I’m not a millionaire or anything.” Ok, somewhere else that may be a great lifestyle, but while trying to sugar date in LA? Pot #2 said something like, “If I had worked one more year, I would have had an extra $100/month on my pension. I totally should have stayed longer.” I politely sat there chewing my food as quickly as possible and nodding my head with the best poker face I could muster up. And ok, I’ll admit, I’m actually quite entertained by the trainwreck pot dates.

  301. Tina says:

    Yay! Have fun Jenniebug!

  302. Looks like I have a ticket to NY in my inbox… Yay…

  303. Tina says:

    @SDinLA: it’s a deal! But only if we have to wear stilettos while doing it…..only fair and all…..we need to ensure there is no height advantage – I’m only 5’6″, how about you Grassy?

  304. Grasshopper says:

    You captured the jist of the game perfectly – Commendable job, Sensei.

  305. NYG says:


    OK, … may be … I will forgive you.
    Since we used to be neighbors… But Only if you let me to iron your Brioni suit.

  306. SDinLA says:

    @NYG I was expecting you to wait for the upcoming “Real SBs of NYC” show, they specifically said that they needed a stunning Russian femme fatale who preferred caviar to chocolate, and I had you penciled in for that part.

    @Tina Who said anything about keeping profits? We can donate 100% of the profits to worthy causes. I just wanted as many people as possible to watch you and Grasshopper sucking golf balls through garden hoses.

    @LASB Hey neighbor! :::waves::: Wait… that so does not compute. Why are they setting up dates on a site where the women *expect* their dates to be wealthy and to be potentially providing them with allowances/gifts etc. if they are not wealthy? That’s insane.

  307. Looks pretty entertaining to me…

  308. NYG says:


    Yes, the show would have been that boring if you have not had a russian spy girl among you…

  309. Tina says:

    @SDinLA: tickets only if I get part of the profits, or if some of the profits are donated to a non-profit of my choice.

    Grassy may be better than a Hoover, but I’m better than a Dyson – I never lose suction! 😉

  310. LASB says:

    Hello Sugars! On the subject of allowances there has been some great advice given in terms of how to set your profile. Please also keep in mind that there are certain factors involved, such as location. I understand that SDs in certain parts of the country don’t want to give more than $1-2k/month or only will do P4P, but from what I’ve experienced, it’s quite a bit higher in big cities such as LA, SF, and NYC. Personally, I have never been offered anything less than $4k/month. I set my profile to $3-5K thinking that SDs would more often than not try to bargain me down, though that has never happened. The amount you come up with should ultimately be what you feel comfortable with, taking into account your personal situation and what sort of SDs are in your area.

    SweetToothFairy – I hear ya on the guilt factor. One reason that I entered the sugarbowl was because I got tired of dating guys with a smaller net worth than mine. It sounds shallow, but it makes a difference in how the relationship plays out and I didn’t like having to choose between feeling guilty and paying for us to have nice outings. The funny thing is, lately I’ve had two pot SD dates where the theme has reared it’s ugly head. Both guys sort of confessed that they were not rich while we dined at high end restaurants. One guy even complained about his money problems! I felt no guilt because they were on the site and that’s part of the program. Nevertheless, it’s totally unsexy to sit through!

  311. SDinLA says:

    P.S. Prior post tongue firmly planted in cheek and will be taken in the right spirit I hope.

    P.S. Apologies if I got the mechanics wrong, I had to go look at Wikipedia to see how the show works, I’ve watched an episode or two over the years, but not enough to understand all of the show’s ins and outs.

    P.P.P.S. @Tina can I sell tickets to your golf ball/garden hose contest with Grassy?

  312. Tina says:

    My dearest SDinLA: I will have to challenge you on me losing the sucking a golf ball through a hose challenge. I’ve got a big mouth, big lungs, a competitive spirit and PLENTY of practice under my belt :)

    Grassy, you’re going down! (And not in the fun way!)

  313. SDinLA says:

    @jenniebug maybe something like….

    Survivor, Bal Harbour, the 2 tribes are in a mansion on the Intracoastal. Brandon is Jeff Probst.

    8 SDs: Guru, Dorky, Stormypoo, Alleycat, VaGent, PhoneGuy, NC Gent, SDinLA
    8 SBs: jenniebug, Grasshopper, Tina, Meg, Midwest, EnglishRose, DutchGirl, SouthernCharmSB

    Guys vs. girls. Two tribes, “Johns in Disguise” and “Entitled Princesses”

    Episode 1, Dorky gets voted off because he’s way too naive and he trusted the the others when they said they had his back. To nobody’s surprise, Stormypoo and jenniebug form an alliance and are seen making out when everyone else is trying to assemble the beds to have a place to sleep.

    Episode 2, EnglishRose would get voted off because her fair skin and delicate complexion would be causing her terrible sun burn due to the tribes not having won any sun block yet, making it hard for her to compete.

    Episode 3, Midwest would get voted off because all the SBs worried that she would be the biggest threat to organize a strong alliance.

    Episode 4, Guru would be next to be targeted, again because he’s a threat to become a leader, but he wins immunity in the “How to juggle the most SBs at once challenge” and VAGent volunteers to be voted off instead because he is worried that his SB might be back on the site while he is gone, so he wants to get home and check if her profile is active.

    Episode 5, Tina gets voted off after she loses the “Suck a golf ball through a hose” challenge to Grasshopper.

    Episode 6, PhoneGuy bows out when SDinLA bests him in the “Pick up college coeds by making them laugh” challenge

    Episode 7: NC Gent gets voted out when he allows SouthernCharmSB to distract him during the week’s competition, causing the “Johns in Disguise” to lose.

    Episode 8: SouthernCharm gets voted off when the remaining SBs see what happened the prior week and worry that her ability to charm the SDs will allow her to form a strong alliance

    The tribes merge into one, the “Social Outcasts” with Guru, Stormy, SDinLA, Alleycat, Meg, jenniebug, Grasshopper and Dutch Girl remaining.

    Episode 9: SDinLA gets voted off when everyone gets tired of his constant jokes. He get one last laugh when he gets Brandon to sit on a whoopee cushion at Tribal Council

    Episode 10: Meg and Guru both try to enlist Stormypoo/jenniebug into their alliances. Both think they have succeeded. In a shocking immunity challenge upset, Meg beats Guru in a 4-hour battle of “Not Rewarding Bad Behavior” and the Guru is eliminated, leaving 4 SBs and only 2 SDs.

    Episode 11: Stormypoo, at jenniebugs behest, talks to all the other SBs about voting Alleycat off next, because he’s one of 2 remaining men and is stronger in the physical challenges. In another stunning upset, Alleycat holds off Grasshopper in the “Sex with Stilletos On” challenge, and Grasshopper is sent home that night.

    Episode 12: Stormypoo and jenniebug betray their alliance member Meg, fearing that she will organize Alleycat and Dutch Girl against them. Alleycat’s Outback survival skills give him the narrowest edge in the immunity challenge and when Meg fails to win immunity, the Stormypoo/jenniebug alliance ousts Meg at Tribal Council.

    Episode 13: Alleycat survives yet another immunity challenge, and Stormy and jennie’s attempt to eliminate Dutch Girl fail, that night, as they debate who should be voted off, jenniebug gets drunk on Captain Morgan, insults Brandon and is kicked off the show by the producers.

    Episode 14: Dutch Girl surprises the men when her military style training allows her to win the physical “Carrying Shopping Bags back to the Hotel” challenge. Stormypoo wins immunity in the “Tortured Poetry” contest, finally eliminating Alleycat, leaving our final 2 of Dutch Girl and Stormy.

    Episode 15: 2 Months later in Vegas, Brandon reveals that Dutch Girl is the winner of “Survivor, Bal Harbour” in a unanimous vote, because the others were resentful of Stormypoo and jenniebug’s machinations and would rather see anyone but one of those two win (jenniebug did not get to vote since she got kicked off, or she would have undoubtedly voted for Stormypoo.) in a classic example of “staying under the radar, and not making yourself a target while secretly being capable in the physical challenges” strategy.


  314. PrinceCharming says:


    What’s “OK” just depends on what’s negotiated. Ultimately just like real life, you have the option to bail out of an arrangement, but if you negotiated exclusivity, it’s fairly uncool for either side to date outside the arrangement without ending things first. If you haven’t negotiated exclusivity, pretty much anything goes. A real SD is a gentleman who honors his agreements, and though it may be rare, I know I’ve turned down on offers outside an exclusive arrangement. (There’s a safety aspect to negotiating exclusivity, among other reasons.)

    NEVER feel guilty about anything a SD does for you. Remember, he’s doing everything voluntarily, and if he ever feels the arrangement isn’t to his advantage, he can end things, hence NSA. The only worry you should have about his finances is that he actually provides what he promises. Guys that are struggling shouldn’t be trying to be SDs, but if they want to provide you with whatever per month, as long as they provide — that’s their problem, not yours, and you shouldn’t have any concern over this. This may sound ruthless, but it’s the reality of arrangements. Never feel awkward about accepting a gift at any time in the arrangement process, the gifts are simply reminders that the SD values your time and attention and would like more of both.

  315. Thank you so much for all the replies!
    @NC Gent & @Va Gentleman, PrinceCharming
    Re:other guys. I didn’t mean juggle two relationships, but if I go out with my girlfriends and meet a guy at a bar who asks me to go out with him, is that ok and if I start seeing him? If, of course, that person became my bf, I would of course break up with the SD and tell him the truth why. It’s totally hypothetical, I’m just wondering what people’s thoughts and expectations are. I’m assuming that’s what “NSA” is? Maybe not..? If I have a busy SD who travels all the time, i don’t expect him to not want to kiss/take back to his hotel room some cute woman he met and wants to be intimate with him, ya know? I’m just being realistic. I thought the whole point of this, was so SDs can do whatever they want when they are not with there SBs, didn’t realize there are exclusive SB/SD arrangements. That sounds more like a full blown relationship- which is great!

    Re amounts: I meant 5-10 K/mo with everything, and i guess i put that initially because I didn’t want guys who are having financial trouble or are “struggling”. I am the kind of person who would feel bad if someone was paying for me, if I knew they didn’t have the $ to… I’ve had bfs in the past who took me to expensive dinners and bought me really nice gifts, which I knew they could not exactly afford and it made me feel really really guilty and bad. I don’t want to feel like that. I want an SD to whom $1000 is like $1 to me, so after a few months or after the relationship is over, he won’t have the feeling of regret and it wont put a “dent in his wallet”. I just changed my $ amount to “open” Thank you for the advice!!

    Re the topic of $ on the first date: I have my very first meeting coming up and I will be buying a new dress just for that (just so I can FEEL wonderful and confidant, there’s something about new things that gives me that feeling). I don’t expect $$ on the first meeting, I think it would be awkward if he gave it to me, I would politely decline! Maybe I’m being naiive… but the nice restaurant that we are going to, should be enough, I’m sure the bill will be over $200. If he brought me a gift, ont he other hand, it would be very sweet and I would probably accept but I would still feel awkward! I think I would be more comfortable accepting stuff if there was a connection and a relationship between us… SBs, do you ever feel “bad” for accepting gifts/$ on the 1st date that covers beyond of what you spent to get tot he date?
    **I’m so nervous that he is a “fake”** There seems to be so much talk about these bad apples :( why would someone pretend to be something they are not!? This site should be 100% about honestly, not deception. I wish the owners would run a check on each member, maybe even a “soft” credit check- on both SD AND SBs!
    Thank you all for being so real! XOXO

  316. Tina says:

    Not this girl – I’m a luvah not a fightah!

  317. I wonder who would be the winners if we had an episode of survivor based on the bloggers…

  318. Tina says:

    Spot is Gilligan, Meg is the professor, now you just need one last lady and you’re set to start filming! A Japanese pilot my @ss

  319. Tina says:

    Sounds like jenniebug is planning a coup; why Mrs. Thurston Howell, you saucy little minx!

  320. DorkyGuy says:

    I am the japanese pilot who has been living in the jungle for 20 years who didn’t know the war was over

  321. Sounds more like a cast for survivor… sa style…

  322. Tina says:

    er, @Dorky, I think you have one too many, since the original isle didn’t have a dog. Perhaps Spot is the professor? Or would that be you? Or are you Gilligan? And I think you already have one gorgeous woman, just need another……and SDinLA is DEFINITELY your skipper. Perhaps Jenniebug and Stormy for the wealthy couple? 😉

  323. @ prince charming- all of my pot SD have usually contacted me first.

  324. DorkyGuy says:

    Gotta disagree with SouthernGent2 on this one… When my profile was up, I always liked when SB’s contact me. Guess I’m too lazy to do much chasing 😛

  325. PrinceCharming says:

    @SouthernGent2 I’ve done both (profile hidden and open) and the SB that I ended up with from here is someone I would have never messaged, she was thinking more “out of the box” than I was.

    @everyone: It woud be interesting to see how many SBs here contact SDs and how many SDs respond to this. SBs, do you sit waiting for attention, or are you actively message SDs that look like a good fit?

  326. DorkyGuy says:

    Living on a desert island sounds lovely… Better if the only crabs you catch are the kind you eat…

    I may just steal Spot and cast away together. I also need a professor, a skipper, a wealthy couple, and two gorgeous women.

  327. Tina says:

    Ok, I just have to say it: I’m SUPER excited about the fact that my local chain pet supply store has new T-shirts for the spring, and they are the MARVEL SUPERHEROES!!!! YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES! My dog now has a bright green shirt with purple sleeves, and a picture of the hulk coming through a stone wall with the word SMASH! in yellow. It. Is. Awesome!

    There’s also X-Men, Iron Man, Captain America, Spiderman, The Avengers………I think that’s all, but I could be missing one……..which one to get next?

  328. Tina says:

    @SDinLA: how alike we are! Elmer Fudd was one of MY first crushes! Ehehehehehehehehehehehe

  329. Tina says:

    @Jenniebug: we’d make AWESOME cougars. Just sayin’. And congrats with Stormcat – you two seem to be a good match for one another! (Have to say seem, since I only know the blog portions of you!).

    @SDinLA: *swooning* what confectionery delights would you like my dear? I’m thinking Snickerdoodles, but I’m open to suggestions. (by the way, I think Guru has his own blonterage as well, just sayin’)

    RIP Davy Jones…..sniff sniff…..I heard about it earlier today……..

  330. I just heard about Davy Jones about an hour ago.such sad news.

  331. Grasshopper says:

    RIP Davy Jones

  332. SouthernGent2 says:

    @Dayhna – just to be polar opposite to Prince Charming, I can tell you that I would NEVER meet a sb that initiated contact with me. I keep my profile hidden to prevent being contacted. Your job is to create a profile that makes the sd want to contact you.

  333. Grasshopper says:

    Pussycats is the CRAZIEST peoples!

  334. Stormy and I want everyone to know that we are now an official sugar couple. Weare currently making plans to drop everything and run away to an unknown exotic deserted island and make a Swiss family Robinson sugar fantisy life together. Starting tomorrow, we will be using esp to send signals that will enable us to make blog posts and updates.

  335. babydoll says:

    @VaGent~replied a very long blog to you i hope it would show here as i pressed the wrong butotn and had to write again~but i dont see it come out here!!! well if i dont see it tomorrow i might rewrite it again! lol


  336. Trisha says:

    hey, i have not any luck with my profile. can someone take a look at my profile and suggest what changes i need to make to be successful. Thanks profile number is 903374

  337. SDinLA says:

    @Tina as a lowly Blog Jester, I am not sure I deserve the package of baked goods that an esteemed Guru merits.

    But I’l twy to be good. I pwomise. That Spot is a devilish rogue though.

    What if I serenade you, will that make up for Spot being mean?

    I’m going to sing this is Elmer Fudd’s voice, ahem ::clears throat::

    ~~I weawize the way your eyes deceived me
    With tender looks that I mistook for wuuuvvvv
    So take away the fwowers that you gave me
    And send the kind that you wemind me of
    Paper Woses
    Paper Woses
    Oh how weal those woses seem to beee
    But they’re onwy imitation
    Wike your imitation wuuuvvvvvv fooooorrrrr meeeeeee~~

    I remember seeing Marie Osmond sing that on Top of the Pops as a wee lad. Phwoar, that was one of little SDinLA’s first crushes. She was only 13 or 14, but I must have been 7. So I liked older women at one point in my life.

  338. @ Tina screw this. I’m going to go find a bunch of investors now to go raise money and make it happen. Then we can make 11ty billion dollars and become ric cougars!

  339. PrinceCharming says:


    Yes, there are real SDs here — my story is the SD side of yours, a couple really solid multi-year SD/SB relationships before this site. The one SB from here I saw lasted four months and wasn’t the best, but at least something happened. FYI she contacted me, and had a SDs from this site before me. Her strategy was simple: read profiles and contact SDs that looked read, and then screened them through email to weed out as many fakes as possible early on. I love it when the SBs contact me, since that already shows some potential.

  340. SouthernGent2 says:

    @StudentSB J – what general area of the country are you located?

    I thought I would suggest WYP. I have tried it and didn’t do well. The idea and concept seem with good intentions, but something is keeping it from reaching any potential. JMHO

    As for the number of dates, you just have to keep at it. But be persistent in some screening beforehand. Most dates are not going to work out, but you have to continue to play the numbers game.

  341. Va Gentleman says:

    Hi Sweet Tooth Fairy , Student Baby J . and Dayhna ! Welcome to the Blog . The other guys have answered your questions but I will add my $ .02 anyway .


    Re: allowance amounts

    Be very careful what you put there because many guys —I for one –are turned off by the appearance of greed . Put a number that you think you can live with –don’t upbid thinking that you will settle for a lower amount . This is not an auto sales lot . Most serious SDs want to find a SB who is within their budget and who they can have a fun loving experience with. Many SDs will not contact a SB who asks for an amount that is above their level , so you would lose out on a pot great guy . Its better to click on the “negotiable ” tab and talk from there . I would not contact anyone over $1-3000/month and I have had a wonderful SB for a year almost who makes in the upper limit of the range .

    RE: Multiple Daddies and a IRL BF to boot

    I think you will find it hard to juggle multiple guys even if emotionally you can handle it . I think it is better if you get it straight with each guy what their expectations are so you won’t have to sneak around . I would think it would take a very special BF to tolerate your having a SD or two on the side .


    ” I’ve gone out on like a dozen first dates and only one second.”

    Is that because you denied a second date or they did not ask ? It sounds like they were not your kind of guys . Many men here are much older -it is the nature of the beast . And there are many faux SDs who are looking for cheaper PTP /escorts . The key is to be specific about what you want and have numerous conversations via text,email and/or phone before you meet them . In their defence there are also a lot of escorts who use this site prospecting for clients . When listing what qualities you are seeking such as age , be careful not to eliminate viable candidates . An example is age . Sometimes it pays to kiss a few frogs in order to find the prince .

    RE: compensation for a date

    It is not going to happen for many of us so you will lose many available and attractive pot SDs. Don’t do it . Except —if you live in NYC and have a $60 cab ride it is not unreasonable to ask for help with expenses to make it happen . That is a nicer way to see how serious the SD is .If you just need to drive 1 mile to the neighborhood Starbux don’t ask for cab fare .

    @ Dayhna

    You know how great a SD relationship can be so you just need to find the right guy . Good luck !

  342. Tina says:

    @jenniebug: that’s an interesting thought…………..I think I just heard my oven cringe…………

  343. @Tina- If we were to do thi… Then place an add on every sugar site on the web… I wonder how big it would get.

  344. PrinceCharming says:

    @SweetToothFairy –

    My experience so far (most of my SBs have come from IRL) is that SBs on this site see the allowance amount as cash, and aren’t counting gifts, but it’s also my sense that this depends on the SB. I think many of the low-allowance SBs are just looking for gifts, and the higher allowance ($5K+) are looking for cash, but maybe some other SD/SBs can chime in. The last SB I got from this site was absolutely looking for cash and gifts/dinners were in addition to that, and between that, asking for loans, and no-showing for weeks at a time, she was far more expensive than the agreement and didn’t last very long.

    I would suggest you put 2-3K plus gifts in the text of your profile and drop your allowance to the 1-3K category. I am reluctant to message 3-5K profiles and still shy away from the 5-10K profiles. My best SB ever had 2500 allowance a month plus lots of gifts, which is very much in my financial comfort zone, so we dated for years and with that allowance amount, I absolutely loved getting gifts and fixing financial surprises (car problems, unexpected bills) for my SB! My arrangements have run from 2.5K to more than 10K/mo, and 2.5K gets lost in the noise, whereas though I can afford it, I notice 10K, and have regretted the expense at that level (ie didn’t feel it was fair in the end, so I simply won’t do arrangements at that level now.)

    Also, though unlikely, it’s not impossible for arrangements to lead to marriage — another SB relationship I had transitioned to a “real” relationship and our getting engaged, though
    she ended up getting cold feet.

    There’s nothing wrong with dating outside the SB/SD relationship, or having more than one SD, *** as long as everyone knows ***. In your case, you’re just prospecting, so until an arrangement is in play, you can do whatever you wish with a clear conscience. I could go into more about my bad-apple SB horror story, but I’ll just leave it at if you don’t lie to the SD, almost everything else can be negotiated around. If you do lie, it can kill a really good
    arrangement instantly.

  345. Tina says:

    @jenniebug: you read my mind!

  346. @Tina we can also capitalize and include flowers and naughty toys for an additional charge.

  347. Tina says:

    @jenniebug: hell ya!

  348. @ Tina OK that’s it, we should go into businessmaking sugargrams for sa members. It can be something like… sendus a address of a member that you really like, and $20 via PayPal… we will send them a package of baked goods and a sweet note to brighten their day. Lol.

  349. babydoll says:

    hello sugars i hope everyone is having a good wednesday its 19.50 London time xxx

    @VaGent~sorry for the late reply,its just a very looonng thread i didnt have the time to read all!!! haha xxx i will try to answer your questions as honestly as i can,i asked my Darling to help me in some if you dont mind,but they will be long and boring so here are my answers …

    Three really personal questions if I may ?
    1) do you talk about his wife and family at all ?

    ~it took us a long time to get to grips to talk about HIS side of the family,actually i didnt have the courage to ask him about his personal life until just very recently,

    2) do you talk about a future together ? And if so in what capacity ? Divorce , continue as is together ?
    3) are you monogamous or does he have sex with his wife and you with other bfs ?

  350. Tina says:

    @SDinLA: I’m sure the laser pointer wasn’t the only thing that was going jiggle jiggle like a bowl full of Jell-O. But I’m glad that you felt like an empowered woman 😉 BTW, in a few weeks I will be able to hit up the local farmers markets here, and will be doing more baking because of it (farm freash eggs – YUMMMMMM). I offered up a care package of said baked goods to Guru, since I know I’ll make more than I can distribute here. Same offer to you if you are interested. As long as you make Spot continue to behave, that is 😉

  351. @dayhna- its kind of a trial and error process. Brandon’s book has somehelpfull tips though.

  352. dayhna says:

    Lmao ahahahahah ok

  353. @dayhna- yes. I strongly advise skipping steps 2,10,11,12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17,19,21 and 32- 45….lol

  354. dayhna says:

    @ Captain jennibug thanks love, is there a technique that you use or is this just something that HAS to happen with intuition….

  355. StudentSB J says:

    thats supposed to be a smiley face btw, not a frown!

  356. StudentSB J says:

    Thanks for your responses, I found them comforting.

    @SouthernGent2 – WYP was the absolute worst, I got nowhere on there at all!! I kind of think I’m doing something wrong but at the same time given how many dates I’ve had given the high ratio of SBs to SDs Im not sure I am.

    @PhoneGuy – When I first joined (two months ago) I had no intention to charge for a first date. I felt like the first date was just a way for both sides to gauge chemistry and compatibility. But then people started flaking about meeting up again and I changed my mind.

    The effort to go on a date really adds up over time (hair, make up, nice clothes, your time) so I feel like getting something for the first date does two things: 1. It discourages people who aren’t willing to spend on an SB, and 2. Even if I don’t hear from the guy (either bc he flaked or bc there wasn’t any chemistry) at least I didn’t end up down at the end of the night. When you’re a broke student even taking the subway or a cab to or from a date can be a real hardship but a lot of SDs don’t realize/appreciate that.

    I’m getting back on the horse so to speak. I’m happy with a few of the guys I’ve gotten to meet I just wish more of them were on-going arrangement minded. Thanks for your comments :)

  357. I’ve had ongoing arrangements. The good ones are hard to find… once you find them its worth it though.

  358. dayhna says:

    Hello Everyone!!!
    I too am new to the site, I am having a hard time weeding out the bad apples.
    I previously was with a SD for four years I know what its like to be pampered and spoiled. Just enjoying the moment. My girlfriend introduced me to this site and None of these guys seem real. Is it me or has anyone had an ongoing arrangement?

  359. PhoneGuy says:

    SweetToothFairy, I probably wouldn’t put $5k-10k as it may scare off a lot of SDs. Are you requiring travel as part of your sugar package? I would probably pick 1-3 or 3-5 (or Open) and put something in there about wanting an allowance plus shopping and/or travel. It will at least give the guy an idea where you are coming from and provide an avenue to start the discussion. Good luck.

  360. @victorianosecret- is that a wax sculpture? That’s trippy.

  361. NC Gent says:

    Sara — welcome to the blog – you seemed to have figured out the key to an SD search — patience! I am a big fan of taking about 2-3 weeks to get to know someone before I meet them. You can really learn a lot. It also tells me that the SB is serious and interested in me enough to invest that time. Others are up for quickly meeting, but your approach has always worked best for me.

    May your sugar always be sweet!

  362. NC Gent says:

    SweetToothFairy – welcome to the blog! There is absolutely nothing wrong with scheduling two separate dates with potential SDs. In fact, it is very smart, because the percentage of first dates that leads to arrangements is well below 50%, in my experience.

    Also, there is nothing wrong with you having IRL dates, as long as you and your SD haven’t agreed to exclusivity. Typically, SBs get more money for agreeing to exclusivity, because you have taken yourself off of the market for him. My only caution, it may be difficult to juggle a bf and an SD, but many before you have successfully done it.

    Hope you have a great sugar experience!

  363. PhoneGuy says:

    @Student Baby J,
    Sorry to hear about your bad experiences. Again, I don’t understand why people would misrepresent when they are just going to get found out. I’m always saying how I don’t think it is fair to ask for compensation on a first meet. Maybe I should change my tune though. A token amount may get rid of some of the flakes and entice more girls to respond and go for that first meet. Hmm.

  364. SouthernGent2 says:

    @StudentBabyJ – at least you are clearly getting a lot of attention and interest to have so many dates. That’s the good news. Hopefully you will be able to weed out some of the bad apples and be able to go on less dates, but with more quality type sd’s. Sounds easy enough, but its not.

    If you are looking for a gift for each meet, have you tried the WYP site? That certainly gives you another option where you can “cash in” a bit on each first date.

  365. Anna Molly says:

    Hi everyone! 😀

  366. VictoriaNoSecret says:


  367. Student Baby J says:

    This site seems to be way more bad sugar daddies than good ones, not just a few bad apples. I’ve heard from SBs on other forums that the site used to have much higher quality SDs earlier on. I think memberships should cost more which would discourage people from joining just for kicks. Also norms should be posted on the site so people have some basic rules (e.g. I think some compensation for a first date should be the norm. I’m usually willing to see a pot SD again but so many of them flake that I feel like I was just used for my few hours of younger attractive company.)

    I don’t get why the comments section on these posts devolve into an impromptu chat room for insiders. But I digress… As a (verified!) college baby I look at the site as a way to have fun and get some much needed cash to get by, but I’ve gone out on like a dozen first dates and only one second. Most of the guys were much older, and more importantly, poorer than they indicated on the site. Worst of all they’re largely looking to get girls to play on the first date and move on NOT develop an ongoing arrangement.

    I am still holding out hope I can find a generous SD for a tasteful arrangement.

  368. Nwsugarbaby says:

    The shirt reminds me of two things the song “lick me like a lollipop” and how many licks to the center of the lollipop commercials. one, two, three, four….opps.

    In response to the oral sex topic. i like it both ways giving and receiving. i personally dont like the taste of cum though so that means its more of a foreplay thing.

    STIs topic be safe, get tested, still be safe

    Hmm what else did I miss.. oh yes spot is in rehab, but we have meg back :)

    @captain jenniebug morgan get a good night rest with those pills and feeling better shortly.

  369. ContentSB says:

    Re: oral protection. Maybe my girl friends and I are stupid, but I don’t think I’ve ever heard of anyone I personally know using a dental dam or condom for oral sex. I suppose that could be irresponsible on our part, but I think that seems to be what the majority of people do (?).

    @NYG — Re: vibrators vs. men. I agree…they’re totally different…and honestly it doesn’t happen very often for me with men. I’m more external than internal, so orgasming from intercourse is difficult to achieve. On the other hand, I often find that men don’t use the right amount of pressure/speed for me to orgasm externally…and sometimes no amount of instruction can fix that. It doesn’t bother me at all though because I enjoy the experience/intimacy and don’t need that final “end result” lol.

  370. Stormcat says:

    Everyone just cool it okay! It was just an unfortunate sequence of timing that led to some miscommunication. Everything is good.
    Well there is a lot of superfluous poo scattered around here that someone is going to have to clean up! So be careful where you walk. 8)

  371. Grasshopper says:

    Yeah..and now pot SD is mentioning sucking toes…says it’s a developing foot fetish…
    So yeah..by the time he’s through with me i’ma look like I do when I get out from soaking in a bath for an hour – What the hell is that moisture soaked skin called? Pruney?…LoLoL

    I found an even better T-Shirt..


  372. Grasshopper says:

    Senseipoo – ::bows::

  373. SDinLA says:

    @Grasshopper I see that you passed on the cuckold. If you decide to try the gentleman with the oral sex fixation, your Sensei recommends that you get a t-shirt with the old Tootsie Roll Pop slogan on it: “How many licks does it take…”

    @Tina I tried wearing vibrating panties. It made the laser pointer jiggle when I was trying to give a presentation with Powerpoint slides. But they made me feel like such an empowered woman wearing them under my Brioni suit.

    @megadoodle Again with the statistics. I’m warning you, I’m going to have to start talking about taxes again…

  374. Well, I’d love to stay and talk about poo…. But it seems that a 4 hour trip to the emergency room this morning has landed me some damm good pain pills. Have fun everyone. I’m going to get a good nights sleep.

  375. SweetToothFairy says:

    Hi SD&SBs!!! This is my very first week on this site and I’m now to all of this. I’ve just read most of the above and wanted to thank you for all the wonderful advice!
    So I have a couple of Qs…
    @PrinceCharming : You say that SBs will often put a higher #$ on their profile but will be happy with a lower allowance per month… That section states that it can be in a form of allowance, gifts, dinners, etc. I put 5-10K but I certainly don’t expect to be given that per month. I hoping for more ~2-3 and the rest to be vacations, dinners, massages together, shopping, whatever the SD is spending even if it’s just gum and redbull at CVS, that all adds up. So is that not the case for most people, do most require the “allowance” to be what the put int hat section?
    Also @everyone: If I have an initial meeting set up with someone, is it wrong to set up another one with someone else and have “2 pending”? Or if we meet, but don’t agree on anything and just keep talking to get to know each other, is it wrong to see others to find the one that’s “the best for me”?
    Also I understand that this “arrangement” is not going to lead to marriage, and that’s not how I’d want to meet my husband anyway, i don’t think. So is it wrong to go on a date with a guy who asks me out on a date not int he SB/SD world- someone who COULD potentially be a husband one day?
    Just wondering…
    Thank you and goodnight =)

  376. SDinLA says:

    Damn it Dorky, can’t a guy have a 6 hour phone conversation with SouthernCharmSB in peace?

    I’m still here, just been busy what with all the drama with Spot and such. Kind of at a loss for what to add to the vibrator discussion… other than to muse that a man endowed with your life-sized Mt. Rushmore tattooed penis must not need sex toys to please his women. For those of us less prodigiously endowed, I will say that Sybians are not universally liked by women. You’ve been watching too much Howard Stern. Got one for one of my SBs and she sold it on online because she did not like it. The depreciation was pretty bad. I guess people don’t believe you when you put “only used twice, cleaned by OCD SD”

    Used sex toys ::shudder:: that thought alone is enough to have me refilling my supply of Purell.

    Most battery operated vibrators are not very sturdy. You get what you pay for. Some of the more expensive ones have sturdier motors and are quieter, my GFs/SBs have liked some of the Lelo stuff, much “classier” looking too.

    Forget your snorkel thingy, if you can invent a vibrator that is as strong/durable as the corded ones that runs on batteries, women would be erecting statues in your name.

  377. Grasshopper says:

    @Dorkypoo – This blog should have brown eyes for as much poo it has in it 😉

  378. E says:

    Hi all sugar babies! Wanted to warn you about one creep on here. I’m sure I probably can’t give you his direct # but he is young (20’s) says he wants only hot thin girls, kind of brags…anyways he said we would meet for 500 per date then left me with 100 after….how disgusting is that….either he is lieing about his “million dollar income” or he’s just an a******. I wish I could say his name and number on here but I’m sure it would get deleted. Beware ladies!!

  379. DorkyGuy says:

    Where is SDinLAypoo tonight? And why is it when I say that out loud, I sound like I am yodeling?

  380. DorkyGuy says:

    An illustrated description of sugar dating:


    Doesn’t that say it all?

  381. Tina says:

    @NYG: to answer your question as delicately as I can, yes, they are different. For me, it’s all in my head (trying to get me to stop thinking and just enjoy the moment is a problem in both situations). For me, the physical contact with someone during sex is part of the whole experience, as well as the emotional connection, which makes the orgasm quite different. For the toy instance, that’s just a simple fulfillment of a need. Takes care of the physical urge, but doesn’t address emotional needs.

    So yes, because of those differences, it causes a different physical response.

  382. @ nyg- during a 6 hour phone coonversation. We talk alot… almost every day…

  383. Tina says:

    @Phone Guy: I agree, those caresses/thoughts/small sentiments/etc should provide reassurance. BUT, there are those people that need you to tell them on a weekly (or sometimes more often) basis that everything is “A OK”. Been there, done that. It didn’t matter what I did – I would text everyday telling him that I loved him, made him special dinners just because I wanted to, provided for his kids when he couldn’t (yes, he had 2 kids), etc. All that wasn’t enough for him that I wanted to be with him, but he couldn’t tell me what I COULD do to convince him that I wasn’t going anywhere. It boiled down to his own lack of self confidence, regardless of what I did to try to alleviate his concerns.

  384. NYG says:

    PLEASE read at your own risk.

    Girls (Content, Victoria, Tina and all please) since we were discussing toys/vibrators today
    I wasted to ask you. Are your orgasms with a toy/vibrator and a guy very different? mines are so different! like 2 kinds of orgasms from 2 different planets.
    with a guy I get very wet, it is long but not so “bright” , with a vibrator it is super intense, super bright, not too wet but very hot and very short 3-4 secs. only . And if I drink alcohol it is easier to cum with a guy , but if I drink even a little bit of alcohol (half glass of wine) I can not cum with
    vibrator. sorry if it is too much. I hope to hear your thoughts too.

  385. PhoneGuy says:

    Dorky/Tina/et al, I think the two things are related. My general reassurances of my feelings (holding hands, hugs, caresses, sweet words) show my attitude toward the person and thus the relationship and should provide some reassurance.

  386. Tina says:

    well, crap, that didn’t work! :(

    BIG HUG MEG! [img]http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys/smiley-hug008.gif[/img]

  387. NYG says:

    Stormy u r not inspired? Baby doll posted a poem (kind of for you). ? I mean you post your poems sometimes here too.

  388. Tina says:

    Oh, I almost forgot: @meg [img]http://www.sherv.net/kiss-emoticon-176.html[/img] right back atcha!

  389. NYG says:

    Jenny I did not understand. Stormy “said it during long conversation” or Stormy wrote this exact words/ same meaning words in this blog.
    Coz I remember you were writing you had a long phone conversation with him. And often I can not catch up with the blog.

    Anyway…. We have to be safe , and we can do STD topic each week. :)

  390. PhoneGuy says:

    Sweet. The conversation got back to oral.

  391. Tina says:

    @jenniebug: for me, I can understand the uncertainty at first while the relationship is still early, but it needs to die quickly. Part of the draw for me to the sugar lifestyle is that the relationship is *supposed* to be very open with communication and expectations. So the need to constantly reassure the other half as to what the relationship is seems to be added stress and drama to something that, by definition, should contain as little drama as possible. I would find it necessary to discuss this with my SD, and let them know what my expectations are (something like “I would just like to talk about what our relationship is, and what each of us expects…” ok, well, maybe put it a little bit nicer, but you get the drift).

  392. VanillaSugar says:

    @ContentSB @VictoriaNoSecret Ikr!!! I have a rabbit and another one, not sure of the name though. But I don’t use them on the regular. Guess I have to find a different one..well, that’s something to add for the weekend :)

    @DorkyGuy Oral isn’t something I do on the regular, actually only done it to 2 people, and both were boyfriends, didn’t use anything. But it’s not something I would do to someone I just met or only known for a short time. I have to know you and know that you are a trusting person. It’s a risk.

  393. @ Tina -yes, I’m talking about constant reassurance that the relationship is in tact. Should that be necessary?

  394. Tina says:

    @jenniebug: just for clarification, what kind of reassurance are you talking about? I was assuming that you were referring to constant reassurance that the relationship is in tact. For reassurance on how I feel, I give that freely and often as well. What I don’t like is the reassurance that “everything is ok” – I’ve had relationships where the person I was with always wondered if there was anything wrong, even when I tried many things to reassure him that things were just fine. Later I found out that this was coming from the fact that he didn’t feel he was good enough for me because I made more money and had more education.

  395. DorkyGuy says:

    @jennie, doesn’t every relationship require reassurance? I tell my kids I love them all the time, and they are supposed to know it.

    If you have an emotional connection, I think regular reassurance is a given. It doesn’t have to be much. Just a text here and there to let them know you are thinking of them. If you don’t have any emotional connection, it doesn’t sound much like a SB/SD relationship to me.

  396. Tina says:

    @jenniebug: oh no, it’s a deal breaker with me. I don’t mind reassuring someone when something big is happening, but on a regular basis it’s SUCH a turnoff. I’m attracted to people that are self-confident, and needing constant reassurance is a big red flag. Plus, if I’m always reassuring them, who is going to be there when I need the reassurance?

  397. Hmm, I’m wondering what everyone thinks about an SD/sb that requires constant re assurance. Sounds just alittle unstable to me… but just for conversations sake, how would everyone deal with one like that

  398. Grasshopper says:

    @Dorky – Hmmm…Grassypoo, eh? I’m diggin that ;P

  399. @Stormypoo- you should add me to your messanger. I’ve been meaning to webcam conference for weeks now.

  400. NYG says:

    For the last 6 years they vaccinate 9-11 y old girl HPV vaccine.
    And just now they stared to vaccinate 11-13 y old boys .
    since 80-90 % of guys on this planet are carriers of these viruses (and get oral cancer HPV related as I mention already before).

    All the SDs here and most of the girls here have not received this vaccine and will NEVER get vaccinate against HPV – too late.

  401. DorkyGuy says:

    Yeah, my question was what people actually do in actual practice, not what “best practices” are. I know the ideal is abstaining or having a full-body latex fetish. I get the impression though that most people take (calculated) risks, and am curious how that calculation works into their actual interactions. For example, dental dams? (assuming not), rubber or no rubber in oral? What are the circumstances where they consider it safe to go sans-condom, or do they ever?

    Not asking what the doctors recommend, or what is safest. Asking what people actually do.

  402. @ stormypoo- Hmm… seems to be an odd day today. You don’t really need to explain. Its cool.

  403. DorkyGuy says:

    If Grasshopper ever gets a SD, I hope he calls her grassypoo…:P

  404. Tina says:

    We’ve already had the STD discussion in previous posts; I think this discussion was supposed to be around your thoughts on how you treat oral sex in regards to STD transmission i.e. do you use protection? Are you as concerned about STD transmission with oral sex as you are with vaginal sex? If you use protection, what kind do you use?

    But, of course, this is just an assumption on my part. You’ll have to ask the original poster on what their intent is.

  405. Stormcat says:

    Jennibaba~ I’m around! Just not inspired to say anything. The philosopher’s dilemma, I’m still trying to figure out what’s real and why.

  406. @Nyg- I remember stormypoo saying those exact same words.We had a long conversation about this weeks ago.

  407. Tina says:

    @jenniebug: WHOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!

  408. @ Tina its fun when your out in a group, and only the people in the group know. Then the button gets pressed while your talking to the waiter at the dinner table. They don’t understand why everyone is laughing.

  409. NYG says:

    Thank you, I was just writing about STD panel/check .

    Theoretically a guy can do SDT tests 5 days ago, then had sex with HIV positive (any STD positive girl) 3 days ago … How can you trust… What is the point to do this panel, still have to use a condom .

    It take 21 days for our body to build antibodies so if someone got viral SDT the tests would not snow untill 21 days after . And we are not even talking about HPV, herpes – do they test guys for all types of HPV? it is like 18 of them. of course they can do PCR ($400 in our lab) to detect a virus in small titer … But for standard SDT check do they do it? usually it is done for example on newborn babies who’s mother are HIV positive, so they know for sure what are they looking for.

    Of course it is good if guy have recent STD check but still Condom anyway!

    The only way I know partners do it: do STD test, stay exclusive for 3 months, still using condoms for these 3 months , and after 3 months STD panel again, then go no condom. So they are really exclusive and No Strangers for each other since they are r together for 3 months, this way no diseases guaranty . !

    this is how married guys do who wants to have SB/affair and do not bring anything to their wives.

    Just SDT tests a guy brought to you means so little ; it could be have done too early (for a/b to show up in blood) or he might have slept with someone 1 hour later after he took these tests.

  410. PhoneGuy says:

    kidding, kidding…some things are better left in happy fantasy land
    @Content, thank you. It’s rude to squash another person’s dream. 😉

    meg, hey look, meg is still alive! :-)

    PhoneGuy fantasizes about having Grasshopper’s problems of having men want to give him oral.
    @DorkyGuy, Darn it Dorky! Grrrr.

  411. Sybians are tons of fun… A magic genie is better…

  412. Tina says:

    @jenniebug: yup, I know, but not everyone has heard of the egg 😉

  413. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    @Dorkyguy thanks for the idea… Now I can give my shower head a rest.

  414. @Tina The remote egg works better then the panties

  415. DorkyGuy says:

    Ack, you have my brain rolling on the vibrator topic….

    Try the remote control vibrator thing on a second or third date, but don’t tell him. He will just think you are really, really into him. I wonder if anybody takes these fantasy ideas and actually does them?

    Also, you could save up your pennies and buy a Sybian. They go for only $1400 these days, and your biggest problem might be keeping your girlfriends from trying to steal it.

  416. Tina says:

    Want to make a new friend? Wear some of the remote control vibrating panties, go to a bookstore, coffee shop, etc. and hand the remote to an attractive stranger. Pretend to get involved in something as they try to figure out what you handed them, and see how they react when they finally figure out what it is.

  417. @ meg- look up a comprehensive STD panel. It tests for herpes 1&2… I’m well a wear that if you contract HIV, it could take months/years to show up on a blood test. Hpv is not tested but is now being vaccinated. I have also been in contact with a few doctors that had some extremely interesting facts about hpv. I think I’m up on it. But when in doubt, flavored condoms rork!

  418. DorkyGuy says:

    Like I would know anything about women’s toys…

    For the plug-in variety, I hear a lot of women like the Hitachi Magic Wand. However, I have read that the Brookstone Personal Massager is better reviewed partly because it has more speed options.

    Of course if you want to get yourself off while getting your kink on, you could always buy a remote controlled massager, and go to a coffee shop and pretend to read a book 😉 That actually sounds pretty hot.

    Like a guy would know anything about that stuff though.

  419. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    @Vanilla what toys are you using???! They last months… My toys don’t last 3 weeks! Cheap ones and expensive ones. I’m considering one that plugs in the wall. My poor jackrabbit is dying on me. Can’t use it while my son is asleep, it sounds like a lawn mower… It’s days are numbered. lol.

  420. Grasshopper says:

    @meg – The explanation I got was that he REALLY enjoys giving pleasure…he said that is the ultimate turn on for him.He is married..and wants the intimacy without “going all the way”.

    And as far as the cuckold goes..I’ve already stopped talking to him. I wasn’t really feeling it…and since I’m not big into time wasting (especially when it comes to my own), I decided to exit stage left

  421. DorkyGuy says:

    @meg~ my inquiry was less about determining risk (I can read a science journal for that). I am more interested in gauging what is happening in real world practice, and what prevalent attitudes are.

  422. meg says:

    @Jennie – quick note:

    HIV tests are non-conclusive until 3-6 months after contracting the virus. Other things [HPV, Herpes] are not tested. Carefulness is always a good thing.

  423. Tina says:

    I treat oral sex with the same regard as any other type of sex. I’ve never had a dental dam used, but I also have had the discussion (and test results) with all of my sexual partners save my first.

  424. meg says:

    @Dorky – honestly, the “studies” and “statistics” re. transmission rates are all-over-the-place-un-conclusive for oral sex. I think, for you [and for anyone else] you should read the existing literature and make an educated decision… well, as educated a decision as you can given a paucity of inconclusive studies…

  425. meg says:

    Tina!!! [kisses!!! Typing this word because I can’t create emoti-cons]

    @ Content

    The first guy I was intimate with never initiated that, but would literally push my head down to give him oral (yes…i was naive and eventually came to my senses and realized that he was a huuuuge jerk haha).

    Ugh. I blame porn…lol… There’s a nice way to guide someone’s head down to your cock, and a not-nice way! Guys who don’t know the difference should be tied up and butt-f^&%ed 😉

  426. DorkyGuy says:

    A brazen question for the gals…. regarding safe sex…

    Do you (or have you ever) used a dental dam in cunnilingus? Supposedly stuff can spread that way, and I get the impression that form of protection is rarely used.

    What steps to you take to minimize risk in a BJ? Require a condom? do it only as foreplay? Assume there is no risk?

    Just curious about the female perspective on these topics…

  427. Anyone who likes to give oral is invited to my room for lunch….

  428. Tina says:

    MEGGIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It’s about dang time you blogged again! 😀 And I don’t think you’re wired wrong, I know many women that it just isn’t their thing. For me, it’s something that has to fit my mood – there are times that I’m into it, and other times that I’m just not.

  429. ContentSB says:

    @meg — I’m with you there. Sometimes it seems appealing…but then it’s usually disappointing. The first guy I was intimate with never initiated that, but would literally push my head down to give him oral (yes…i was naive and eventually came to my senses and realized that he was a huuuuge jerk haha). Ever since then I just haven’t really been able to get into receiving.

    @Vanilla — Toy?? Not toyS? Girl, go buy more fun toys for yourself! 😉

  430. I wonder where stormypoo is today……its rare to not see him post for this long.

  431. meg says:


    Went from a Cuckold Pot SD that wanted me to date many men and come back to him so that then he could have HIS turn at me…to a Pot SD that doesn’t want to have actual sex…he just wants oral..and not to receive it…just to give it! (which is something I’d have to FORCE myself to endure..heh ;P )…But MY GOD talk about going from one extreme to the other! Eee-Gads! Can’t I find an effing middle ground around here? Is that TOO much to ask for, people?! Sheesh! ::smh::

    Oh my goodness… I’m pretty sure you’re going to find this odd…but Option One [if he’s providing a good allowance] sounds really hot to me. Lol. I’ve had option two guys…which leads to next question…

    Guys and Girls [re. Oral Sex]…

    Oral sex SO isn’t my thing. I would rather make out with a guy while he fingers me…

    But guys really seem to like doing it. Is it because:
    1) They think girls like oral sex?
    2) They just like giving cunnilingus?

    And girls…am I missing something? Or simply wired improperly?

  432. DorkyGuy says:

    You guys have such normal fantasies…

    PhoneGuy fantasizes about having Grasshopper’s problems of having men want to give him oral. CSB has much funner fantasies to my taste (not judging you PhoneGuy… just not my thing).

    My fantasies seem to border on the bizarre.

    Just now, I was thinking (this is absolutely true), wouldn’t it be cool if girls traveled in herds, pillow fighting across the plain. Then it occurred to me the perfect soundtrack for the documentary would be “Buffalo Gals”.

  433. VanillaSugar says:

    Hello all! Ok, All this talk about oral is making me sooooo sad. I’ve been using my toy for the past 3 months, smh. I’m going crazy!!!!!

  434. ContentSB says:

    @PhoneGuy — They’re not? Oh….so that’s just me??

    kidding, kidding…some things are better left in happy fantasy land 😉

  435. PhoneGuy says:

    But I’m assuming those are only women who are looking for a female SB
    In my mind all women are open to finding other women. 😀

  436. Grasshopper says:

    Hooray for the Snorkelingus!…Thanks, Dorky! *wink*

  437. DorkyGuy says:

    ‘morning! I’ve got to stop pulling all-nighters and then sleeping all day. I was only going to lay down for an hour at noon, and it’s 7pm.

    @VictoriaNoSecret~ sorry hon, I am not actively looking at the moment. The universe will have to speak another day :)

    @babydoll~ beautiful poem! You have a very lucky SD.

    @NYG/Grasshopper~ Thanks a lot! You killed my important discussion of tax preparation with…. oral sex? A bunch of pervs! sheesh

    By the way, there is only one proper way to give oral, and it involves the use of my Snorkelingus (patent pending). If you don’t have one handy, you can make do by sticking straws in his nose… just be careful not to get to wild or you can impale them up into his brain and kill him.

  438. @ContentSB- Hmm, you have a good point about being blonde……

  439. ContentSB says:

    @VictoriaNoSecret/@Phone guy…nevermind….I’m going crazy. She’s right…i multiplied each by ten because i was thinking there were 326 pages with 10 profiles on each page. Being blonde can be rough sometimes 😉

  440. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    Just looked… 326 on the entire site :(

  441. ContentSB says:

    @PhoneGuy — But I’m assuming those are only women who are looking for a female SB?

  442. ContentSB says:

    @PhoneGuy — If I change my settings to say I’m interested in a SM and do a quick search about 3500 profiles come up, whereas 310,000+ come up for SDs.

  443. I forget what the numbers were. But the sugar mamas seemed to be extremly responsive. One of my roommates showed me that two out of three emails he sent were replied to. From what im hearing, that’s better then what some sb’s get from the sds. There was one point when everyone in my house was dating someone off of the site. It was interesting.

  444. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    There are 9 sugar mommas currently logged in in the U.S. and the others are very inactive profiles…. Last logged in in months ago or the sexy lady in the bikini that sends spam. lol

  445. PhoneGuy says:

    Oh, I’m sure. I was just curious about the numbers…

  446. @PhoneGuy- when i first got onto the site, my roommates joined too. All 3 of them were male soldiers. They did a search and there were far less sugar mommies then sugar daddies.

  447. PhoneGuy says:

    Has anyone ever searched to see how many sugar mommas are on this site?

  448. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    I’m entertaining the idea of a sugar momma. I love both men and women… Any advice?

  449. Grasshopper says:

    take*…haha..I was preoccupied with the thought of lips

  450. Grasshopper says:

    @Tina – Re: “I’m going to assume that many of that 0.1% have probably never had it done correctly. I’ve run into a few men that have NO CLUE what they’re doing…..tsk tsk……”

    I’m sure you’re absolutely right about that one 😉

    @VictoriaNoSecret – Re: “@grasshopper I’d take that overly oral pot off your hands lol. Then maybe I won’t keep blowing the motor in my toys”

    Hmm..I don’t think I ever said I wanted anyone to talk him off my lips..oops, um, er..hands ;X

  451. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    @southerngent2 thanks for the update. I didn’t go. I ended up with the last living cave man on a dinner date from hell. lol. I’m laughing about it still.

    @grasshopper I’d take that overly oral pot off your hands :-) lol. Then maybe I won’t keep blowing the motor in my toys

  452. Alison says:

    Thank you to everyone who posted suggestions for me. Moving forward with this whole thing now seems much simpler.

  453. babydoll says:

    to all~goodevening from London#well its now 17.56 here..

    @stormycat~ heres the letter/poem i promised to put on the blog…it is one of my blogs for my Darling Sd as thank you for a wonderful Valentine weekend xxx



    Last night was the most amazing night…
    still smiling with the thought of the intimacy we shared..

    conversations we shared together,the thoughts and the opinions about everything else.
    slept wrapped in his arms… his smell his skin everything else cant compare…

    all those words that were spoken,questions that were asked that were answered..
    still i cant express enough how i feel …
    in my mind what is here,there after?

    when i know i am here to make him happy
    what would it cost to make yourself worthy?

    when he is here even when he isn’t
    when i know me saying a word he understood..
    when he fills the days with love without saying it
    and without expecting anything in return?

    maybe i know sometimes in his mind,i might go and not say
    that i really do feel love for him and it wont go away xxx

    this Valentines week is special,waiting for yesterday to come and to finally
    be with him…the yearning the wanting,and whatever good things i feel for him..

    he has a life that one that he lived before me,
    he said,once you’ve done something you cant go back anymore…
    this is what i know but didnt say a word to contradict it.

    what is wrong and what is right?
    it maybe wrong for some and right for others
    but one thing i know this is all i ever wanted…

    waking up looking at him…
    the blue sky smiling
    it is the perfect end to a lovely weekend
    the time i was anticipating…

    a Valentine week that i never expected to have
    but still he made sure that i did…

    i see him walk around the room,smiling at me,holding me feeling me
    kissing me…
    those big blue eyes with all the tenderness in the world
    the world thats just me and him…
    where no one knows
    there are two souls that were joined together
    who adore each other…even i sometimes cant explain
    now with him,nothing can be the same…

    i know the time will come when he will go with his day
    but never the less he still came my way…
    and i still love him the same every single day xxx

    as we walk down the hill his hand holding mine,
    i feel a pinch in my heart,
    and it is the same everytime…
    i sigh with the thought that in a few moments
    …he will walk his way,
    and he wont be mine…

    if all the love could be written down while the wind pass by
    to take it with him wherever he walked by xxx

    and as i wake up in the morning…
    i was looking at him quietly sleeping beside me,
    i softly whisper in his ear,
    i love you my Darling,
    thank you for being here xxx

  454. Tina says:

    @Grassy: I’m going to assume that many of that 0.1% have probably never had it done correctly. I’ve run into a few men that have NO CLUE what they’re doing…..tsk tsk……

  455. Grasshopper says:

    @Dorky – Re: “LOL Grasshopper… I would give this guy a second look. He may be perfect for you. I mean think about it… what do you call a guy who goes from girl to girl, eating them out? A grass hopper..”

    Yes…I think it might be a sign from the Cosmos.

    @PhoneGuy – Yes, PhoneGuy…I, too, wish you had my “problems” – although i’m not sure how you’d feel having to buy tampons every month…

    @NYG – This is the first pot that I’ve come across where the oral thing is so one sided…(in my favor, that is, ;)…ha!)

    Re: “Even through e mails MANY (ok , 8 out of 10 in my statistic would ask if a girl really enjoying receiving oral.”

    I would naturally assume that 99.9% of women LOVE this done…And I’d seriously enjoy slapping the snot out of that other .1%…cause they must be dumber than a can o’ SpaghettiOs – regardless of how delicious they might be (referring to the SpaghettiOs, of course) ;X

  456. SouthernGent2 says:

    @VictoriaNoSecret – sorry I gave you and the other Atlanta girl some bad info the other day. It was pointed out to me by one of our other esteemed bloggers that BluePointe recently closed. So hopefully you had not made plans to go SD hunting there tonight 😉

  457. NYG says:

    Dorky is not on this site anymore :)
    Dorky are you? I can not see you no more.

    To Grasshopper .

    I wanted to talk about guys giving oral before here, but it is never a topic here.

    I got a feeling that a lot of guys looking for arrangements with SB coz they do like to give oral more than receive .
    Had they liked only receiving it – would be easier to find a pro, or any one night stand…
    But coz they do enjoy giving it… They have to find one clean real girl; and it is much more difficult for a guy than just to find a girl and get a BJ.

    Even through e mails MANY (ok , 8 out of 10 in my statistic :) would ask if a girl really enjoying
    receiving oral; coz this is what he enjoys the most – to make his girl feel good.

    (sorry to interrupt the tax preparation topic). :)

  458. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    @Dorkyguy now all I have to do now is find you! LOL. What city are you in? Zipcode… I have to do an advance search.

  459. DorkyGuy says:

    HA! The universe has spoken

  460. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    @Dorkyguy we must be dreaming of eachother! I’m a tax preparer. lol

  461. DorkyGuy says:

    @VictoriaNoSecret~ I know what you mean 😀 I just had the most wonderful dream that my SB was doing my taxes 😉

  462. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    Just woke up from a wonderfully erotic dream :) hope my next SD does all that 😉

  463. DorkyGuy says:

    Sadly working, I use the blog for occasional distraction while I plot world domination.

  464. PhoneGuy says:

    Seriously, what are you people doing awake? 😉

  465. PhoneGuy says:

    he just wants oral..and not to receive it…just to give it!
    Ah Grasshopper, I wish I had your problems. 😉
    haha, sorry, just kidding.

  466. DorkyGuy says:

    LOL Grasshopper… I would give this guy a second look. He may be perfect for you. I mean think about it… what do you call a guy who goes from girl to girl, eating them out? A grass hopper. 😛

  467. Grasshopper says:

    Went from a Cuckold Pot SD that wanted me to date many men and come back to him so that then he could have HIS turn at me…to a Pot SD that doesn’t want to have actual sex…he just wants oral..and not to receive it…just to give it! (which is something I’d have to FORCE myself to endure..heh ;P )…But MY GOD talk about going from one extreme to the other! Eee-Gads! Can’t I find an effing middle ground around here? Is that TOO much to ask for, people?! Sheesh! ::smh::

  468. Sara says:

    My experience as a SB:

    Have you met a bad apple Sugar Daddy or Sugar Baby on the website?
    Yes I have been bad apple SD on this site. Just like any dating site, you need to weed out the creeps/losers/flakes/fakes/picture collectors/etc….

    Has the experience discouraged you in any way?
    Yes, as a result, I have quit this site twice and had to delete my account. I just re-joined after a year on hiatus and it seems promising.

    Do you have any suggestions on how to deal with such bad apple Sugar Daddies or Babies?
    Don’t be so naiive! When I first joined this site, I didn’t know what I was doing! I didn’t read this blog! (which would’ve helped so much!) Sorry, I just noticed the blog today and found some really good advice on this post. I am too naiive and gullible and that is a sheer weakness. I have too much faith in men. I have met my fair share of letdowns… I feel so stupid! But I have learned my lesson! I have met guys who claimed to be SD, groped me in public, promised me money but never gave any, flaked, stalked me, etc. YES, I have had my fair share of bad apples! However, I have had 2 perfect SD arrangements out of this site which were worth the hassle! They were very kind, generous, sweet, and we had a harmonious relationship. They have restored my faith in men and made me continue the search for an SD.

    My advice is to be patient! Don’t expect to find a perfect SD right away! Don’t expect too much! At first, I was impatient and wanted to avoid the emailing, calling, then meeting BS but it really helps! Now, I love emailing, calling, and meeting for coffee and talking in person. It has helped me to gain a better sense of the person and get a feel for whether I am comfortable with this person or not. If I have any doubts, I tell him, and leave without pressure. Don’t really trust a guy to do what he says until there is clear proof of it! His actions will prove if he is a real SD or not! Don’t be intimidated and let a guy control you because he will walk all over you and abuse you. Be careful and always take care of your own safety. Never give out a phone number until you feel safe, email until you meet at a public place. Always better to be safe than sorry. Also, younger men are too pushy, insecure, total dicks, and treat you like shit! Find an older man who will truly appreciate you and treat you like a princess! By older, I mean over 40 years old! I am 24 years old and on my last semester of college but I love the older men. Perhaps I have an old spirit?

  469. DorkyGuy says:

    @Alison~ When you are logged in, there is a “Support” link at the top right, next to the “Log Off” button. You can create an official support ticket with SeekingArrangement from there.

  470. Beach_Girl says:

    @ Alison~ You can contact GuruSD on his blog, he is the moderator of this blog, You just need to find his post and click on his name Also, if you go to the contact us page of the site, you have Brandon Wade’s facebook link , there is also a feedback email… maybe try there!

  471. Alison says:

    I have been on this site for about 3 years, and only recently had a true “bad apple” experience. All I want to say about it publicly is that I consulted a domestic violence counselor and an attorney afterwards, both of which encouraged me to press charges and file a restraining order. I have yet to find any direct contact info for an administrator or moderator of some sort in order to voice my concerns about this particular SD. Any suggestions are appreciated!

  472. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars!!!

    Erin~ There are some SDs that like to do pay per date, but I rather have an allowance. He may not be a time waster. Some SDs do pay per date for the first month or so and then move on to a monthly allowance. It all depends of the person. And there are time wasters on both sides i’m sure!

    Dorky, hahhaha at the chess sets… love it!

  473. PrinceCharming says:

    @Erin: Time wasters are an issue for both sides, I’ve done several long email exchanges to have the SB disappear the moment a meeting is suggested. I agree that the allowance is just part of the “deal,” and for the SBs I have have met, one of the last things discussed before the meeting was the finances.

    Negotiating is not so clear-cut, and I don’t think it automatically means the SD is a bad apple. When I initially started being a SD, I took the allowance amounts very seriously, and passed up on even contacting SBs if they were out of range. Yet if you look at blog comments, there are many mentions of listing a higher amount than you really want so there’s negotiating room — and once that’s done, it sort of presumes negotiation will take place. In that case, if I’m willing to give a $2500 allowance and the woman is listed at $3-$5K, she might actually be very happy with the $2500, but the SD won’t know if he doesn’t ask!

    My preference would be the allowance amount is exactly what’s desired, just like my preference would be for the car dealer to put the lowest price they’ll accept on the car, but sadly that’s not what happens. Don’t take the negotiations as disrespectful, just tell the SD you’re not asking for more than you want or looking to negotiate, and whatever number given as the allowance amount is THE number. The SD reading your ad/email has no idea if you’re padding the number or not, and successful SDs are pretty used to negotiating deals all the time, and don’t take the process personally, it’s more of a yes I can afford that/no I can process.

    Also don’t forget that sadly both SBs and SDs try to renegotiate after the arrangement has started (which has happened to me) and I think that’s far worse and more disrespectful than simply seeing if you’ll be happy with a lower number than the first one that was put out there.

  474. DorkyGuy says:

    $300/meet is a $2400 allowance if you meet twice a week. That seems like a respectable allowance to me. Am I missing something?

    Maybe it is in the phrasing? If he said $2400/month instead of $300/meet would you feel better about it?

  475. Erin says:

    I also hate the guys who have profiles that say they have millions but then offer you like, 300 per date….come on. How cheap is that if your income is true.

  476. Erin says:

    I have def. had some bad experiences but nothing too bad. Mostly just time wasters and cheap guys looking for cheap escorts.

    Time wasters are my biggest pet peeve….why even bother. Also people who don’t understand the relationship and want a gf out of it and get upset when you ask about the allowance part-I like to be upfront about that because lets face it, it is an important aspect of the sd/sb relationship.

    Men who are looking to negotiate a lower price are incredibly disrespectful.

  477. PhoneGuy says:

    I say we buy them both and then split them into 2 sets of shot/vibrators.

  478. DorkyGuy says:

    hmmm… chess pieces are shot glasses…

    If half are shot glasses, and half are vibrators, does it become a race to get off before you are too drunk to perform?

    Surprisingly, I can’t find any examples of vibrating shot glasses. There’s an opportunity for an invention. Sounds like a home run!

  479. PhoneGuy says:

    Hmmm, so half the pieces are shot glasses and the other half vibrators? Cool!

  480. Tina says:

    Body shots and vibrators? whoa boy!

  481. This chess game sounds like it’ll mix well with body shots!

  482. Stormcat says:

    Jenniebaba “Sounds like a long game.”
    Oh I do hope so!! 8)

  483. Stormcat says:

    Babydoll ~ “lol!!! why put rules??? if i have it for me,i would be trying each and everything like a box of big chocolate truffles randomly!!!”
    Now there’s a cold shower visual 8) Whuw, pant! pant! :mrgreen:

  484. Betty Blue says:

    I had another general question — Is flying to meet someone for the first meeting , ever a good idea ? ive had some bad experience with it in the past ( pot SD canceling once I was already en route on the plane ) . But I understand that many successful men are very busy , so I try to be accommadating to their schedule . Is there a safe way to do this , especially if Im flying on a private plane? Thoughts?

  485. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    @SD Guru I was trying to prove that I could give a “normal guy” a chance. I’ve had 2 SDs in the past 11 years one an NFL player and the other an investment banker. People often say I’ve lost touch with reality because of them and normal guys deserve a chance too. He was extremely well mannered from the moment he got my number up until a week later when we went out for dinner. I guess he decided to let me meet the real him… The @$$hole! I look back at it and laugh though. It’s a learning lesson…

  486. SDinLA says:

    Treachery! Spot tried to stage a Palace coup. Locked all of us in the basement all weekend. When they caught him, he was trying to transfer assets out of my name into Swiss bank accounts, ticket to London and forged vet papers in paw.

    After I bailed him out, he confessed that he’s had a substance abuse problem for years (CatNip) and has secretly been seeing Fluffy the cat as his SB on the side. But several months ago Fluffy started acting all entitled and demanded a huge increase in her allowance, so he was over-billing me on the legal work in order to keep Fluffy happy. I was questioning him last week re: the legal bills since we’ve been so busy with the Dorky libel stuff, and he got worried that I was about to find out.

    As you might imagine, I am devastated by the betrayal, but CatNip is an evil evil thing and hope to be able to forgive Spot once he gets out of rehab. He’s in a 30 day residential program in Malibu, so he won’t be posting anytime soon.

    @Dorky That chess set would make an awesome conversation piece, but I would never be able to use it to play chess once any of the pieces had bee used as vibrators. OCD tendencies and all.

    Hope everyone had a good weekend and that your weeks have started off well. Will try to catch up on blog comments soon.

  487. @Stormypoo – Sounds like a long game.

  488. NC Gent says:

    DorkyGuy — your self-deprecating humor is hilarious! I literally do LOL in my office when I read some of your stuff :)

  489. DorkyGuy says:

    LOL, in retrospect, chess is probably the perfect game for me…

    It moves glacially slow, you put in way too much time and analysis before you get around to mating, and when you finally do mate, it is over in a second.

    I should switch to checkers, where at least I get to hop around and yell “King me, baby!” a few times.

  490. Betty Blue says:

    @vacasugar —- whats your profile number ?

  491. VacaSugar says:

    @Bettyblue-get the blog pep to give u my email! Mb we can meet up while I’m visiting 😉

  492. NYG says:

    Now u r talking. great chess set.

    Baby doll:
    thank you. I was very feministic and powerful (at my job (in my country) 70 guys had to follow my orders everyday) for a long period of time , well for 6 years; now I have a desires to be viewed as a sex toy sometimes , turn me on, it is easy for me to derive my pleasure by pleasing my guy; and you are lucky you enjoy your SD and yourself so much.

  493. babydoll says:

    @dorky/stormcat~lol!!! why put rules??? if i have it for me,i would be trying each and everything like a box of big chocolate truffles randomly!!!

    • SD Guru says:

      This idiot then says I see things I want, I buy it. He said when I saw you the other day I said I want her and I plan to purchase her!

      I’m sorry to hear about your experience. How much did you communicate with him prior to the meeting? In hindsight, were there any warning signs that you might have missed?

      We had the talk of exclusivity a few weeks ago. How should I bring this up?

      When you talked about exclusivity, what was the result? Was there a clear understanding and agreement?? If so then just remind him of that conversation and see how he reacts. If not then you should have the talk again to get on the same page.

      This chess set is made up entirely of vibrators…

      Where’s the next game of naked chess, and who’s playing?? :mrgreen:

  494. DorkyGuy says:

    @StormCat, I don’t know, but it would be a whole lot of fun at a sugar party!

  495. babydoll says:

    @nyg~ i know this is too late a comment re being seen as a sex object…

    well i love being a sex object for my man!!! i would actually do everythign for him to be attracted to me in such a way that he will feel happier than anything to be intimate with me when we can !
    haha 😉
    i know its not something that everyone agrees upon,but heck,i love it,i love dressing up for him,
    and i love to see that sparkle in his eyes when he sees me like that and i know i am who he wants 😉
    if your man wants you for talking,if you have to be up until 3 am listening to him..then do.

    if he wants you for intimacy,make sure you are the best person he will ever do it with when he gets out of that bed everytime! for short,be the best sexual person he ever had.

  496. Stormcat says:

    Good Morning Sugarland ~ It feels like the start of a lovely week.

    NYG , PhoneGuy ~ “I was hoping Margaritas had something to do with the drink”
    Margaritas ante porcos (Pearls before Swine) loosly translated becomes Just drink your margaritas and ignore the pigs!!

    Jennibaba, DorkyGuy ~ So what would be the rules of play? Like you have to use a vibrator on yourself before you can move it. And if you capture a piece you get to use it on your opponent before play can continue. What about check and check – – – mate?

  497. babydoll says:

    hello everyone xxx

    glad to see all are having a merry time in the sugarbowl :))

    tried to write over the weekend but the site wont let me get in.. booo!!

    anyway,been very busy the past couple weeks witht work and spending time with my Sd
    as much as we can specialy ove the Valentine weekend..
    last week was work and my darling Sd’s uncle became so unwell and passed away yesterday…
    so a bit of an emotional time and giving support to him as much as i can and as much as he will let me…

    @stormy~thank you so much for the poem,i will try to post another one of mine,but its more like a letter that i have written on one of my blogs …

    @dorky~thank you for your email and yes i havve been so overwhelmed with loads of things lately so couldnt blog here as much as i wanted,but happy to hear from fellow bloggers here once in a while xxx

    @asianSB~wow,the main reason i came to this blog early this year was becasue i thought oneof the Sd profiles here was my Sd,like you i didnt wait too long for him to find me when i first signed up on another Sugar site where we met,but have fallen inlove and we are still together,so i was a bit put off when i read one of the profiles before wwe sat and talked for the first 66 months which was january that we committed to eah other as a reviewif we will still carry on or not,
    so when i read that profile i was sure it fits him except~the age was different!!!
    got so upset and went to this blog for advice.
    i guess,it was being honest on how you really feel about it when you saw his profile,
    did it make you ‘jealous?’,upset? you have to be honest to yourself before you can speak to him about it.
    one Sd adviced me to speak to him and when the time of our talk came,i just did.i asked him straight if he was looking for anoher Sb,well the answer was NO.and he actually thought i was asking him becasue i wanted to find another SD!! lol
    so we sorted it out and we spoke about this again the valentine weekend,he isnt interested to find another Sb and is happy to keep me wether IRL or as an Sb.well,he doesnt feel like he is an Sd anyeay as the feelings are more than sugar for both of us.
    but remember,what you dont ask,you wont know the answer xxx
    if you have been with him for a year,i assume there is a lot of room for discussion?
    one thing that i have with my Sd is i can ask him anything and he will answer me the best possible answer he can :)
    good luck and i hope it will all work out in both your favors :)

    @bettyblue~no you werent over reacting,be always on guard whatever happens xxx
    there is no reason in the world that pot Sd or IRL guy should follow you home with no consent.
    one thing that we were told on the Sugar site i first signed up on,was not to tell an Sd your home address unless you are very sure that heis trustworthy and you feel comfortable enough tto tell him,but it should be done in your own time not his.

    i love the chess set!!!

    @englishrose/dutchy ~ i hope you both had a grand time t the club!!!!
    lets catch up soon xxx

  498. @DorkyGuy- Oooooh, I want, I want!!!!!!!!! That is soooo awesome….

  499. DorkyGuy says:

    What do you get for the SB or SD who has everything?

    This chess set is made up entirely of vibrators… Each piece is a fully functional sex toy, made of medical grade silicone, with gold plate detailing.

    The set will cost you a modest $7,000.


  500. DorkyGuy says:

    @BettyBlue~ no, you are not overreaching. It is a huge red flag. If this guy is so brazen as to follow you to your home, he will not respect any other boundaries you try to put up either. He sounds like he may have a dangerous personality. Trust your gut on this one, and use all avenues to insulate/protect yourself from him.

  501. @Betty Blue -Also make sure that you report this to the site. Make sure that you include the guys profile number,they know who your dealing with.

  502. BettyBlue says:

    Thanks , just wanted to be sure I wasnt over- reacting . Its never happened to me before .

  503. DorkyGuy says:

    @BettyBlue~ I agree with jenniebug. File a report with the police with all of the info you have on him. If you go missing (scary as that sounds), they need to know where to start looking. In addition, they may send a uniformed officer to his house to ask him questions. That might be enough to scare the bejeezus out of him.

  504. Betty blue Umm… That would constitute as him being stalkerish. Call the police and file a report. If you see him aroud your house, file a restraining order. Don’t put up with people like that…

  505. BettyBlue says:

    @ Vaca Sugar — Im in South Florida :-) Where are you from?

    General question to everyone — I went on a first date with a pot SD and it went great. . . . until I notice that instead of going where he said he was going to go — he was following me home . I turned on a street other than my own and thought I lost him . Then as I get out of my car and walking in , I see him slowly driving by my house. Would this give anyone else the creeps? I can maybe understand after seeing each other for awhile , but to be followed home after the first date seemed creepy .

  506. NC Gent says:

    Jennifer — contact support on the web site. That happened to me once, and it was because the email I used when paying wasn’t the same as the email I used to log in — quirky but when I sent an email they got it resolved within a few hours.

    AsianSB — I would say something like… remember when we talked about exclusivity a few weeks ago…. hope it goes well for you. Many times SBs get extra compensation for being exclusive, but not sure that is what you are seeking.

  507. I paid for a premium upgrade on feb 26 and it was taken off my credit card why cant I use the upgrade features

  508. AsianSB says:

    I found my SD on the first day of signing up. I had been with him since the start of this year. I am very pleased with him but I just looked at his profile. He had tweaked his age. We had the talk of exclusivity a few weeks ago. How should I bring this up? I remember him asking me opinions on his profile description. Didn’t think it’s any reason to be fussed with but I’m slightly uncomfortable that he might still be active on this site.

  509. All I remember is a particularlybad week one week. It went a little something like, oh crap… this is my 5th double shift.. Its going on 10pm… wtf do these people want. Yeah, restaurant life sucks…I always give my Waiters nothing but compassion and empathy when i see them…

  510. Beach_Girl says:

    PhoneGuy~ lol, some comebacks are hard to translate lol… When I get really mad, which doesn’t happen often at all, but when I do, I talk Frenglish lol…

    @Restaurant servers, It is a hard job, but some people shouldn’t work in that industry! I had one person not want to serve me and friends visiting from the US coz we were speaking English… I got mad and cursed him out in french and English… lol…I know that they have many people to serve, but a smile and being polite goes a long way. They don’t all do that! Some just look like they want you to leave and you haven’t even sat down!

  511. ContentSB says:

    @jenniebug — No kidding. There are SO many factors guests aren’t even aware of when they’re eating out if they haven’t worked in a restaurant before. It’s so frustrating because it seems like people forget what manners are the second they walk through the door. I understand expecting good service, but goodness sometimes a bit of grace goes a LONG way, as does remembering you’re not the only person the server is trying to please…you could very well be 1 of 20.

  512. If I get into a disagreement with a waiter, I usually try to concider their feelings. I’ve worked in way to many restaurants. The amount of crap that they put up i just terrible. I think they should be entitled to a free pass sometimes.

  513. PhoneGuy says:

    I was hoping Margaritas had something to do with the drink. 😉 I did look it up though.

    There is nothing more frustrating than not being able to curse someone out in the proper language. I got in a disagreement with a waiter in Paris once and the worst I was able to say was “you are a very bad man.” They really ought to start the language lesson with cursing.

  514. VacaSugar says:

    Going to be in FL (Palm beach/ Miami area) Tuesday night…Any SB’S want to go out? Get in touch!

  515. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars!

    VictoriaNoSecret~ Great comeback
    Sometimes I have the best comebacks, but other times I can’t think of how to say it in English or French lol…

    Just watched the Oscars… OMG, Angelina Jolie need to eat something… she looks emaciated!!!
    The show was way too long… ah well it was a nice distraction… but The Artist won best picture… blah, really??? I silent film… gimmy a break!!!!

  516. NYG says:

    if that bring you satisfaction :)

  517. DorkyGuy says:

    Why? For my own satisfaction, of course!

  518. NYG says:

    Why would you want to indulge people who do not deserve it with your “comebacks”?

    One of my fav Latin proverbs (and I studied Latin for 6 years) is “Margaritas ante porcos” .

  519. DorkyGuy says:

    Yeah, no kidding… usually the best comebacks I can come up with on the spot are “I know you are, but what am I” or “I’m rubber and you’re glue”. The terrific comebacks always spring to mind at exactly the moment when saying them would make me look foolish.

  520. NYG says:

    Dorky said he is jealous , I have to second that,
    I am jealouse too.
    I have never been with a guy from Nigeria , I actually never been with any African or African-American guy.
    Although I do like exotic and rare and exceptional guys.

  521. PhoneGuy says:

    two pots is easy. 😉
    Try two actual SDs.

  522. @VictoriaNoSecret- Be careful trying to juggle two pot sds can be tricky.

  523. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    As if the blog gods sent out the word about my awful encounter last night, three of the I’ve been chatting with made very generous offers today. Who knows meeting on line daddies may be better than meeting daddies my accident in person. lol. Even after last night I’m still hopeful. :) Now I have to decide which SD is seriously a keeper. It will be a fun few weeks of dates and sugar filled fun!

  524. Va Gentleman says:


    ” —we just ended falling inlove hehe
    so that cant be too bad ”

    I love it ! Your attitude is exactly what I find attractive in a SB and I am so glad you have a great SD . I also have the same thing .

    Three really personal questions if I may ?
    1) do you talk about his wife and family at all ?
    2) do you talk about a future together ? And if so in what capacity ? Divorce , continue as is together ?
    3) are you monogamous or does he have sex with his wife and you with other bfs ?

  525. sundanc607 says:

    I just joined but had great first experience..Guy was much older but sweet. The foot feetish is nothing too wird…

  526. @VictoriaNoSecret-Spammers= Boo!

  527. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    @grasshopper we may have been. I knew one I’d find you :) lol Here I was thinking I was a lonely little chocolate girl trying to fit in in the world of sugar. ;*

    @capt I got that too. Pretty hot chick in a black bathing suit? Smh

  528. Susie says:

    Great info. Thank you everyone!

  529. Is anyone else getting spammed? I just got a letter from sa saying that I’m getting mail from a chick? When i go to click to view the message, it says the account was deleted.

  530. Hampu Adrian says:

    need a sugar mommy : ) [img]http://uploadimage.ro/images/78975647484635083825.jpg[/img]

  531. Grasshopper says:

    @VictoiaNoSecret – Re: “Im a smarty pants at heart and growing up my mouth got me in trouble the things that came out mostly and the things I put in too. LOL.”

    Are you sure we weren’t separated at birth???

    @Tina – well..that’s ok..I was planning on painting them black anyway – you know..to match my soul 😉

  532. Tina says:

    @Grassy: oh yeah? Well, my dog sniffed out your entire stash, and they’re now all spray painted black and red….MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  533. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    This superb specimen of a man was from Nigeria. For some odd reason I’ve been attracting men from that country a lot these past few years. They say I have “the look”. Whatever…. lol

    @Dorkyguy Im a smarty pants at heart and growing up my mouth got me in trouble :) the things that came out mostly and the things I put in too. LOL.

    @[email protected]@capt j Morgan thanks 😉

  534. Grasshopper says:

    @VictoriaNoSecret – one word…..BRAVA!

    @Tina – ::pulls out the spare halo I always keep in my back pocket:: Sorry if you thought that was my only one…I have a plethora of them…I buy the economy “Box O’ Halos” at Costco. Needless to say they come in handy 😉

  535. Tina says:

    @jenniebug: apparently he’s from the moon, because it’s apparent he’s been suffering froma lack of oxygen that killed WAAAAAAAAY too many brain cells.

    @Grassy: hmmmm, maybe he’s a new fetish guy for you to go all Dominatrix on and turn him into a submissive….MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA (yanks off Grassy’s halo and runs with it)

  536. @ VictoriaNoSecret- Sounds shady… ick… where did he say he was from?

  537. Tina says:

    @VictoriaNoSecret: That. Was. AWESOME!

  538. DorkyGuy says:

    @VictoriaNoSecret~ I am insanely jealous. How did you come up with a comeback like that right on the spot? Brilliant!

    Had I been in that spot, the perfect comeback wouldn’t have occurred to me until later, and I would have spent the next week trying to figure out how to recreate the moment so that I could deliver it.

  539. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    Sorry for the late update and thanks for the concern. I met this seemly nice and polite guy at Goldfish. I paid for my valet and met him inside. After being seated we ordered and started small talk. He began talking about his businesses and telling me he’s accustomed to dating a certain type of woman but I’m refreshing different and it’s a pleasant surprise. Compliment… not exactly. I asked what type of women does he usually date? He said tall, beautiful, and nicely shaped women. I smiled and said thanks. This idiot then says I see things I want, I buy it. He said when I saw you the other day I said I want her and I plan to purchase her! WTF??? Trying not to lose my composure, I excused myself and went to the restroom to calm down and try to slip out the restaurant. I realized I left my second cell phone(daddy phone) at the table. I blogged and asked for prayer. lol. After being seated he asked what is my price for ownership?! I told him I’m not for looking for a buyer but an arrangement. He said I collect things and people and you will be no different. He said I will pay for you to shut up right now… How much? I couldn’t contain myself. I told him I was leaving before I give him a piece of my mind. He said all you American women are the same. Too stupid to realize submission pays well! I told him if his country was so great to go back there. I stormed out and while waiting on valet he came outside and threw a few hundred dollar bills at my feet and said I don’t chase women I buy them. I laughed and said,” Dumbass you just chased me and you bought yourself an invitation to kiss my @$$!” I got in my car and drove off.

  540. @NYG- Did I ever say I’ve slept with strangers? Umm…I really don’t recall that. Nice assumption.

  541. NYG says:

    Ok, it is 00:27 in here. Good night everyone. Ttyt.

  542. Beach_Girl says:

    PhoneGuy~ there are SDs that write heavy smoker and heavy drinker… weird to me that someone would write that… to me that means “I’m an alcoholic chain smoker!”

  543. NYG says:


    “I am too broke to be a SugarMommy” .

    Sorry if I misunderstood you , but a few pages ago you wrote,( sorry not your exact citation but… ). “I do not ask SDs for money, they gave me gifts… I should ask guys not to give my anything but donate to my fav charities “.

    If you think it is not my business and going to write it, it is OK. :)
    As GURU says a SB has to have a thick skin. :)

    And u r married and your husband does have a job and money (right? He has SBs too)
    and you travel to SDs (and sometimes it is a date “from hell) and you would sleep with stranger
    to ask them to donate to your fav charities ?
    And just now you wrote you are too broke. sorry, I am missing something. May be my logic is broken or it is a language barrier.

    Or we can have a new daughter web site with Brandon “intimate play for charities ” and list of organizations/foundations SDs can donate on line ….

    I hope Jennie you would not get upset with me or anything… anyway we are all anonymous here :)

  544. PhoneGuy says:

    Those shoes happen to be right up my pu…um, er..Alley..yeah..that’s what I was gonna say..
    Post of the Day. 😉

    Circumstances change…you could be an SM someday. 😉
    I wonder how many SMs are on SA.com.

    Speaking of searching for numbers on SA, I came across a profile today where the girl said she was a heavy drinker. Now NO ONE says they are a heavy drinker. It’s just like heavy smokers…you cheat a little and say you are a “light smoker” and then try not to chain smoke through dinner. 😉 So I did a search and there are a total of 7 heavy drinkers in all of Metro Detroit. I may want to warn her to change that…or applaud her for her honesty. 😉

  545. NYG says:

    Grasshopper .
    I asked coz as I wrote beforetan out the 3 guys who were submissive -they all started with the shoe fetish (and end up with SO desires).

    And one of them I met in person ,
    And with another one I talked via phone 3-4 times and he e mailed me and sent his pictures.
    He would call me Mistress on a phone…. And stuff. He wanted to know “how much” but I never told him since wanted to meet him in person first. Anyway…
    I agree If a guy has a fetish he better afford to have this fetish.

  546. What are you all talking about. I’m too broke to be a sm.

  547. DorkyGuy says:

    @Jenniebug, don’t discount the possibility of becoming a SM. There are lots of broke older men 😛

  548. Beach_Girl says:

    Dorky~ those are nice shoes!!! 😀

    Grasshopper~ I know right? He should of totally paid for the shoes if he was going to drool all over them… lol

    captain jenniebug morgan~ Wow, I don’t know if they would fit, I am a 71/2… sorry you can’t wear them

  549. @Beach Girl yes. It is physically impossible for me to wear them with ought breaking my neck, or falling on my face.

  550. Grasshopper says:

    @Beach_Girl – Re: “but… He was broke and so, he wanted me to get my own shoes lol…”

    If they’re gonna be freaks…the least they can do is not expect someone else to foot the bill…
    (no pun intended) 😐

  551. @NYG- No chance of ever becoming an sm. I only date older men…. That is all.

  552. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars!
    Grasshopper~ I once had a pot that wanted to buy me shoes, GianMarco Lorenzi, and he wanted to lick them in public!!! I was totally up for that, but he couldn’t lick the leather lol.. He sent me a video of what he wanted me to do to him… I was totally up for it! lol, seemed like fun!
    but… He was broke and so, he wanted me to get my own shoes lol…

    VictoriaNoSecret~ If you are uncomfortable tell him it’s not working out for you and just go… don’t stay … I did that once and the pot was in “LOVE” with me by the time the waiter came over to take our order… It was a long, long diner, I never ate so fast lol… Then I told him I had to go, didn’t feel good after the food lol…

    captain jenniebug morgan~ Wow, you are giving them away???? your Jimmy Choo’s?

  553. Grasshopper says:

    Me to my shoe fetish SD: “Suck those heels, bitch…suck those heels!”
    SD to me : “Yes my love”


  554. Grasshopper says:

    haha..those are perfect shoes for people with shoe fetishes…That is SOOOO HAWT!

  555. Grasshopper says:

    @DGuy – O……M……F…….G…!…!…!…! What the hell kind of websites do you visit?!?!
    No..I’m serious..what kind of websites do you visit..because I’d love to bookmark that!.
    Those shoes happen to be right up my pu…um, er..Alley..yeah..that’s what I was gonna say..
    they’re right up my ALLEY =X ::gulps..adjusts halo::

  556. DorkyGuy says:

    A couple of pairs for GrassDildoHopper (sorry, no nerf)

    And here is a pair of heels for VictoriaNoSecret in case poser daddy gets her back to his room

    Coolest heels ever:

    And, in tribute to what you girls go through to make yourselves beautiful, have a look at this site:


  557. NYG says:

    I meant SugarMommy. (SM) coz u want to donate.
    I remember u r married to ur SD. Right? or I am confused?

  558. PhoneGuy says:

    Alas, my memory is not what it once was
    Thank God for small favors. 😉

  559. Grasshopper says:

    @Tina – Enjoy the rest of your evening…Goodnight :)

  560. Tina says:

    G’night all that are currently on, and others that join in the wee hours! :)

  561. Tina says:

    @Grassy: well my dear, the 2 dogs I am sitting for are looking at me like I am nuts, and wanting me to start their bedtime routine, so I must bid you goodbye. Have a wonderful night! :)

  562. Grasshopper says:

    @Tina – Alas, my memory is not what it once was


  563. @NYG- Nope… Don’t need a husband. I have other reasons for using sa.

  564. Tina says:

    @Grassy: uh huh, you “forgot”……

  565. Grasshopper says:

    ::does a cartwheel for PhoneGuy…then blushes because I realize I forgot to put any panties on:::


  566. Tina says:

    @Phone Guy: how long have you been lurking over there? And glad to see that we could entertain you 😉

  567. NYG says:

    Oh… Jennybug.
    U r so generous!
    R u going to switch to SM any soon? :)
    Coz u wrote before u did not want to take money from SDs but ask them to donate to ur fav charities ?
    too bad it is not my size of shoes.:(
    But seriously, me too, I have shoes (and dresses) in my closet I have not wore once.
    Is not it sad?

  568. @Stormypoo- Atlanta! Gotta love it!

  569. Tina says:

    @Grassy: “Fresh as a locker room” just doesn’t cut it……

  570. Stormcat says:

    Jenniebaba ~ Whoo hoo! 😀 Look out Atlanta here we come. :roll: 👿 8) 😈 :mrgreen:

  571. PhoneGuy says:

    women eating women…nerf dildos…ball sack smell….this blog has finally turned around. 😉

  572. Grasshopper says:

    @ Tina – Yeah..and the slogan can be something along the lines of “Fresh as a Summer’s Breeze”..oh wait..that one’s been taken already 😉

  573. @ victoriaNoSecret- I agree.. why go there if you know he’s a poser? Keep your phone close to you. If you can post on the blogs during the date… post and let us know your OK.

  574. Grasshopper says:

    @StormyPie – LMFAO 😀

  575. Tina says:

    @ Grassy: I’m working on developing a scent for Febreze to eliminate that – maybe call it “ball sack no more”? No-ballz? Sack Unstink?

  576. Stormcat says:

    Grass-only slightly wierd-hopper ~ “What I failed to admit, though, was that I think HIS lifestyle is WAY THE HELL weirder than mine could EVER be!..haha! YIKES!”
    Laughed right out loud when I read that! OMG Can’t even post the mr cool emot with this one I was laughing so hard.

  577. Grasshopper says:

    haha Tina…Hope she doesn’t mind the ball sack smell coming from the heels..

    lmfao..ok..that WAS Gross..forgive me ::puts scuffed halo back onto head::

  578. Tina says:

    Naaah, I’d be more upfront: “Um, I don’t think this is going to work for me. Goodnight.” And exit stage left or right (whichever is the quickest route outta there!

  579. Grasshopper says:

    I’d be like…”um, er…I THINK I need to use the restroom. Yeah, yeah..that’s it..I need to use the restroom”…::high-tails it outta there::

  580. Tina says:

    (passes a pair of Grassy’s stilettos over to VictoriaNoSecret) Use’em wisely…. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  581. Grasshopper says:

    @VictoriaNoSecret If you know he’s a poser..why go through with it?

  582. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    I ask for your prayers!!!! On a date with a poser daddy!

  583. Tina says:

    Conversations gone limp after starting off so stimulating is such a disappointment…..leaves you wanting……..

  584. Grasshopper says:


  585. Grasshopper says:

    @Tina – And HOW! ;P

  586. Tina says:

    Unless he’s lurking, which I highly doubt; there’s NO WAY he could have let the Nerf dildo conversation….er…fall flat as it were…….

  587. Grasshopper says:


  588. Tina says:

    Wouldn’t we all Grassy, wouldn’t we all………….. 😉

  589. Grasshopper says:

    My Sensei is no where to be found, it seems ::wonders::

  590. Grasshopper says:

    @Tina – haha..Yes…I’d like to be eaten

  591. Tina says:

    @Grassy: so you’re using your avatar to suggest that you’d like to be eaten by red lips? Just askin’….

    And speaking of Nerf dildos, where’s SDinLA? >:)

  592. Grasshopper says:

    Oh..That’s me in the avatar, btw…I’m the one in the chopsticks 😉

  593. Grasshopper says:

    Wow..I typed in the wrong email..hence, no avatar in the prior posts…Eee-Gads

  594. Grasshopper says:

    @NYG – Nope..haven’t met him in person..Just texting. I told him that I only text..no calls (for the sake of discretion). Started off with a few emails..then moved to text rather quickly. The main reason I even gave him any of my time is because I find him attractive..and was curious about that sort of arrangement. I sent him a “Dear Cuckold” text earlier today, to tell him that perhaps he should pass on me – because I think that maybe I’m not the person he’s looking for. He texted back and said he was super busy..but that we’ll talk later. LOL…So we’ll see later on how the rest of the conversation will go =O

    @DGuy – Re: “That settles it… if I ever gift GrassHopper a pair of high heels, they are going to be made of Nerf foam.”

    That’s cool…just make sure to pick up the ones that have the Bonus Nerf Dildo attached..thanks! 😉

  595. blog gods… can you please pass my email address to Tina?

  596. Tina says:

    @ Jenniebug: let’s talk darlin’! I LOVE shoes!

  597. Oooh, Shoe talk reminds me… I was going through my apartment closet the other day. I came across a brand new pair of jimmy choo’s that have never been worn. I ended up getting them around Feb of last year, before breaking my leg. They were a gift. Because I probably won’t be using them, I’m giving them away. They are size 7 1/2. If anyone wants them, let me know.

  598. DorkyGuy says:

    “And besides, I’d much rather be doing sexier things with my stilettos than just stepping on my SD’s balls with them HA!” ~Grass “Ball Skewer” Hopper

    That settles it… if I ever gift GrassHopper a pair of high heels, they are going to be made of Nerf foam.

  599. NYG says:


    I missed some of ur posts, could u tell me if you met this guy in person or just chatted (e mails/phone)?

  600. Grasshopper says:

    @Tina – Tru Dat, Sistah..Tru Dat!..haha

  601. Grasshopper says:

    @PhoneGuy – Yeah..could actually help..ya never know 😉

  602. Tina says:

    @ Phone Guy: careful, you might not like the responses you get 😉 Kink can have some….er….”interesting” responses, to say the least…..

    @Grassy “Stilettos Rock” Hopper: at least you know what you want chica! And sure as heck aren’t afraid to let people know! hehehehe 😉

  603. PhoneGuy says:

    I just stopped seeing my old SB and as everyone around here says…it’s a slow process finding a new one. :-(

    @grasshopper, you spent a bit of time talking to this pot about something you are really not into. Maybe I need to add something strange to my emails to get ladies to respond. 😀

  604. Poutie-Face Tina says:

    @Spot aka SDinLA’s aka Blog Slut Emeritus’ aka Official Blog Jester’s dog: What an entitled little mongrel you are! You are no longer my favorite of your master’s pets. I will schedule your neuter for you soon. Humph!

    @SDinLA’s horse: as you are apparently INFINITELY more congenial than the OTHER 4 legged creature in your household, you are now my favorite. Please expect a box of organic carrots and apples, with sugar cubes mixed in, to be arriving shortly. Also, I will be thinking of a name for you as your master has OBVIOUSLY forgotten HIS manners and did not provide us with a name by which to call you. Please provide a few suggestions, and the blog will put it to a vote.

    Poutie-Face Tina

  605. Grasshopper says:

    Ok..was texting the Cuckold-Pot SD last night..and I wanted to know more about what his lifestyle means to him and also asked him how women generally react once he’s let them know what he likes. He then went on to say “Well, why don’t you tell me how YOU felt once I let you know”. I told him that I wasn’t totally floored by it, since I had had a similar offer around 9 yrs earlier. He then asked me, ” Do you think it’s weird?” I said, “Of course I think it’s weird…duh!…lol..And YOU know it’s weird, too – just as I know that MY Lifestyle is ‘weird’ “…
    I went on to say that HIS and MY lifestyle IS “weird” because they are unacceptable to the masses. What I failed to admit, though, was that I think HIS lifestyle is WAY THE HELL weirder than mine could EVER be!..haha! YIKES!
    Um, so yeah…I don’t think this will work out..cause I will have to be giving an Academy Award Winning Dominatrix Performance everytime I’m with him because it would ALL be acting! I’m SO not turned on by it! That would be way too effing exhausting…..AND I’d probably have to start seeing a shrink JUST to be able to sleep at night….EEE-GADS..
    And besides, I’d much rather be doing sexier things with my stilettos than just stepping on my SD’s balls with them 😉 HA!

  606. Anna Molly says:

    I’m here!!! Sort of.. 😀

  607. Why no sb Phone Guy? Were bored… entertain us.

  608. PhoneGuy says:

    @VNS, haha, that explains why I’m here. 😉

  609. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    @phoneguy everybody is out enjoying their sb/sd.

  610. @phoneguy-Weekends, people are probably doing weekend/family stuff…
    @victorianosecret- few lady’s. I’m sure I know alot of Atl locals that would love to hang out too.

  611. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    @stormcat & capt j morgan lets hang out when you get here! There is nothing sexier than a group of sexy ladies! I’m sure we could get into lots of trouble… I meant fun. lol

  612. PhoneGuy says:

    Seriously, where is everyone? 😉

  613. It seems as if the whole blog has gone dead. ;-(

  614. Stormypoo- I’d love for you to come to Atlanta when i go visit friends. The more company, the better.

  615. Stormcat says:

    Jenniebaba ~ Would it be alright if I go along too. I promise not to behave :mrgreen:

  616. Stormcat says:

    Dutchy “This morning I did two hours of cross country training and I think I am going to be so sore tomorrow morning that I will have to roll out of my bed! No idea how I am going to manage the stairs though.”

    Mountain Bike!

  617. @victorianosecret- your welcome doll. Let me know if there’s any other way that i can help… I’ll probably be in the Atl area withen the next few months. Meybe you would like to go with me to a few party’s? It would be nice to get to know some fellow sb’s…

  618. NYG says:

    Thank you for your amazing positive and sexy post. I am very happy for you.

  619. Dutch Girl says:

    @Spot How is the paperwork for the 6 month-quarantine going?

    This morning I did two hours of cross country training and I think I am going to be so sore tomorrow morning that I will have to roll out of my bed! No idea how I am going to manage the stairs though.

  620. SouthernCharmSB says:

    Hi there sugar fam! Now that midterms are over, it’s time for me to enjoy some much needed R&R and maybe a tad of sugary fun too…hope everyone has a spectacular weekend!! xoxoxo :)

  621. Stormcat says:

    babydoll ~ You and your SD are in a very enviable place and I’m sure many are just wishing they were one in your relationship. SDs would like to be your SD and SBs would like to be you. Don’t overthink it. Just enjoy the journey that the two of you share. When the time comes that you decide to take seperate paths there will likely be another to share that part of the journey with you.

  622. babydoll says:

    hello sugars xxx

    glad to see all is well in the sugarbowl :)))

    @stormy~thank you for that poem you posted xxx i will try to post one that i made for valentines day,but its more of a letter than a poem it was a thank you for my Sd for a wonderful valentine week he gave me xxx

    re arrangements etc~glad all is over lol
    cant believe everyone are still in loggerheads what is the right sugar and not haha!
    anyway all is differen with deifferent needs,emotional beliefs and ocfcourse principles.
    well i know its all been said already but no need t take offence to everyones point of view.
    i have an allowance and whne we meet more than we should my Sd still gives me more but my allowance is given or whatever it is he wants to give me financially as a gift he always gives it to me inside a love card and something lovlely written inside and so it diffusses the feeling of a paid woman who spend time with him.
    we have discussed recently on how we can carryin with our relationship with all his responsibility towards me intact but nt having to all eah other SD/SB as we feelt hat our relationship is too loving now to carry on as that.but we’ll see… it can finish tomorrow for all we know.
    anyway, i have seen alot of profiles here that have gazillions of dollars as allowance they want a month and i am quite surprised!! i feel actually poor for it lol.

    but on the site hwere i was first signed up where i met my Sd,i didnt put how much i wanted or expecting as i really didnt know who will find me or his capacity.
    i am new so i only have guesswork to work on and he is new as well so we basically learned from each other.but now that it all worked out really well and it turned into a love relationship we are happy to be IRL soon…but again,we’ll see.but hope is a good thing it keeps life alive and remain in color rather than in grey.
    buti understand that like my Sd there are alot of good Sd’s who are not millionnaires but hardworking men who are happy to provide Sugar in the capacity that they can.
    personally i rather want to have a reasonable allowance but stable as well rather than having 3k but only lasts 2-3 months then all dead for the next 12 months as i know those kind of Sd’s come far in between and not a lot of them around as the other Sb’s here who still are waiting for the SD to come along 12 months down the line.
    with my Sd i made it clear that i dont see him as an ATM machine who will pay for my lifestyl,but rather a bestfriend,a lover and someone i adore.
    when togehter i make sure he is very happy and he is content being with me,and we have been together longer than most SD/SB relationships that people expect and basing on what i read on this site.i thought at first there was something wrong with us!!! haha
    bu well,we just ended falling inlove hehe
    so that cant be too bad 😉
    but for those who will fall inlove wit married Sd’s like me,i suggest to think very hard,before getting in there as if its marriage you look for its going to lead to heartbreak,but then if you do,be responsible for your actions and accept when it ends :)

    re feelng good being a sex toy !!! i feel happy to be like this for my Sd!!! what the hell,i ask for it hahaha
    i love intimacy and all forms of it and i love to be the one to give that to him and if he sees me as a sex slave/toy/ec what ever you may call it then be it,i remember one of the things that was advised that i liked a lot was,if your Sd wants intimacy and sex make sure you are the best lay he will ever have!!!

    have alovely weekend Sugars and may it be a more sugary weekend to those who are still searching and to those who have already enjoy every moment of it xxxx

    p.s. as usual i dont proof read but you all get my drift eh? 😉

  623. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    @AninaLove it looks like this is going to be the beginning of a beautiful thing. lol. Let’s meet for lunch, dinner,drinks or whatever. Let me know when you are free. Thelma and Louise 2012: SB Edition. lol

    @SouthernGent and Capt J Morgan thanks for the suggestions :)

  624. DorkyGuy says:

    @PhoneGuy~ There is something about the game to that appeals to the professional types. If I remember right, some of the early dominant guilds consisted largely of lawyers, accountants, and such. Death and Taxes springs to mind. Maybe SBs ought to be looking there for SDs? 😛

  625. CandyCoated says:

    Anyone in Santa Barbara?

  626. PhoneGuy says:

    Same…well my main was a warlock but I had a top level mage, druid, pally.

    I had the same problem. It’s just not as fun to play casually. I was embarrassed to say what my hours played were. It still is a significant fraction of my life. 😉

  627. DorkyGuy says:

    @PhoneGuy~ Was at one point a priest with one of the top raiding guilds… but to maintain that level, you have to devote too much time. It’s very difficult for me to just play casually, so I just avoid it now :) The game is absolute genius though. Never tried Warhammer, but I have to admit I am now curious!

  628. PhoneGuy says:

    @Anna Molly,
    I’ve only ever played Warcraft…but maybe I should check out Warhammer. 😉

  629. Anna Molly says:

    PhoneGuy – You never know who you’ll meet playing a MMORPG! If you ever find yourself playing WAR look me up, I’m a Witch Hunter and my name is Pusycat. 😉

  630. NYG says:

    I meant your yesterday’ post.

  631. NYG says:


    After ur e mail I spent all evening googling myself:))

    Anyone can see my salary for many years too coz I used to work for state.

  632. Stormcat says:

    Dorky ~ I think that Blizzard is a trademark that has nothing to do with the flavor. If you want to do this you are going to have to call it something else like tornatos, hurricanes, or tsunamis. That’s it wine tsunamis with cheese debris.

  633. PhoneGuy says:

    I always thought I had to stop playing MMOs to meet women. 😉

    Now you guys have me hungry for a blizzard….I wonder when DQ closes…

  634. @SouthrenGent2- I found some very nice guys at 3 sheets on Fri/sat

  635. SouthernGent2 says:

    @AninaLove and VictoriaNoSecret – the place to look, or so rumor has it, is the bar at BluePointe on Tuesday night. Supposedly that is an underground piece of knowledge for checking out rich guys. Don’t blame me if I am wrong though.

  636. AninaLove says:

    @VictoriaNoSecret (That name is so hot lmao)

    Omg, LETS!! We could be SB partners in crime. Ugh I’m such an Atlanta virgin.


    yea I had this guy email me on this site telling me I seem worth getting to know. We start conversating about what we like to eat and where we’re from, he even asked for my number to chat with me. 2 emails later, after talking about where we like to eat and joking around a bit, I email my number. 4 days go by and I haven’t heard from him, I attempt to email him but he blocked me!!! Omg I never felt so confused LMAO. WOW! was my reaction. DK what that was about but okay.

  637. Snowbaby says:

    Happy that I’m not the only one who is thinking that so much profiles are fake.I two SD’s at this website and I have to say that I’m maybe a bit lucky tho. The first one was a great guy,awesome houses and no b*llshit,he found a girlfriend so we stopped seeing each other as SD/SB.We do have contact,but just as friends.

    Second guy was married,a bit older(Im pretty young) and it had to be all really discreet.I felt more like a escort because he didnt had that much time for me,but he did payed my flights,my 5 star hotels and he gave me $5000,- when I saw him for one hour.For sure we had some intimate moments,but sometimes we just had great talks.He was amazing.Too bad his wife found out…..

  638. DorkyGuy says:

    @Nico~ !!! welcome back! I thought you fell into a big vat of merlot or something.

    @StormCat~ Ohhhh my god…. Stormy, take a note… I need your help with a patent. We should start a business like Dairy Queen, and sell wine and cheese blizzards. We could call it “Snooty Queen”.

    @SDinLA (and dog)~ I am sending a letter to my lawyer this afternoon to seek a restraining order preventing you from stealing my “wine and cheese blizzard” concept by building a wine and cheese fountain, for the purpose of dipping SBs. Unless it is Nico. She could use a good dunking 😛 That will keep the two of you busy while I kick Anna’s ass at Warhammer.

  639. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    @phoneguy I totally didn’t see your question. He works for a state agency and his wages are public. Not a member of spokeo but some of the info is accurate after you double check it with other reliable sources. I used to work in law enforcement. I got sick of hearing I don’t look like I should be an officer… Never figured out what an officer was supposed to look like either. lol

    @aninalove let’s go hangout! I see no harm in that. lol

  640. Grasshopper says:

    I do believe I have ants in me pants =O
    …ok, ok..
    ::settles down:::…sheesh!

  641. Emily says:

    About two months ago, a “Sugar Daddy” from Florida contacted me through this site and said he wanted to meet me. In his profile he states he only wants to meet women who are in his state. Well, about five weeks ago I took a trip to Ft. Lauderdale and told him I was down there and he never got back to me. I told him I was coming down and everything. Now, I didn’t go down there just to meet him. I had some issues to deal with down there, but, again I told him I was coming and let him know I was in Florida and the creep stood me up.
    I think many of these men who claim they’re affluent really aren’t and just like the attention they get from the women on the site. You know, a horny man is like a two year old child who will do anything for attention.
    I think the real Sugar Daddies ought to read our posts on what not to do, so they won’t end up turning of the wrong girls.

  642. Anna Molly says:

    SDinLA ~ Aww. sounds like Spot isn’t in a very good mood! He needs some good lovin’! 😀

    Oh, and by the way, if you REALLY want to see the rest of me that bad, you’ll be doin’ the askin’ yourself! 😉

    Have a great afternoon everyone! 😀

  643. SDinLA says:

    Bubbles, I miss you….


  644. SDinLA's horse says:

    @Ladies of the blog Just wanted to apologize for Spot’s irascible mood. I’m not really sure why he sounds like Sam Spade or Philip Marlowe all of a sudden either. He’s taken to wearing trench coats and fedoras. I think he thinks McGruff the crime dog. He’s not much fun to live with these days, I blame Dorky and his libelous ways.

    Does anyone else break out in song every time they see this blog topic? ~~One bad apple don’t spoil the whole bunch girl ooooh give it one more try before you giiiiive up on looooove~~ People down at the stable say I sounds remarkably like a young Donny Osmond when I sing.

  645. Spot aka SDinLA's dog says:

    @that Tina chick, You got a problem with that lady? Look, I’m up to my adorable ears in paperwork on this legal stuff with Dorky and his eleventeen organizations, the vet can’t fit me in til next week to get my papers for London, and people are comparing us dogs to men… I’m not in the best of moods.

    You sure pout an awful lot. Maybe you should change your name to PouTina. Hey, that reminds me of poutine. Mmmmmm, poutine. Only good thing about Montreal I can remember. Damn dogs there all spoke French.

    @Anna Molly Hey Toots, since Midwest has given up the blog for Lent (I gave up antagonizing the neighborhood cats for Lent, BIG sacrifice, trust me) there is only one blog god. The inimitable SDGuru. He has asked that anyone who wants emails exchanged please email him off blog. So you might want to do that. My master can’t keep the various email requests straight, Blog Slut Emeritus that he is.

  646. Stormcat says:

    Nico ~ Great to see you! :) Always makes me feel happy to know you’re around even if you aren’t posting!

  647. Anna Molly says:

    I just want to say hi to all the new bloggers! *HI* 😀

  648. AninaLove says:


  649. AninaLove says:

    @VictoriaNo Secret

    You know I’ve been thinking that. Man, mabey I would have better luck going out on the town, at least they’d actually be able to see how my demeanor is in real life rather than in emails. I’m pretty new here though & all of my friends are back home. I’ve been meeting new people at work though, I’m pretty social and friendly. Mabey I’ll form a bond tight enough to actually WANT to hang with my new co-workers. :( boy do I wish I had a Sugar Baby Friend. lol I think the main issue is the fact that there are Alot of SB’s in atlanta, most of them with not so good intentions so when a good SB emails a SD how would he be able to tell the good apples from the bad if he doesn’t even reply. Sometimes words or messages comes off wrong in text and emails, so frustrating. Its tough trying to fight your way through the rotten SB’s. They’ve made it tougher for the SB’s out there who actually do have good intentions.[img]C:\Users\Public\Documents\nik’s music\glosmile[/img]

  650. Anna Molly says:

    Speaking of heroic dungeons, I’m kicking ass on Warhammer! 😀

    Hi Nico! Good to see you! :)

    I’m being somewhat lackadaisical today I suppose. 😀

  651. Anna Molly says:

    SDinLA ~ I still haven’t received your email….your not avoiding me are you, ARE YOU??? 😀

  652. Anna Molly says:

    Hi Ya’ll! 😀
    I hope you’re having a good afternoon! 😀

  653. Nico says:

    Wayyyy too many names to remember and sooo many new faces. I’ll just *wave madly* to the blog! Been crazy busy with work as of late but loving it!!! Just wanted to pop in and say HI!!!

  654. SouthernGent2 says:

    @VictoriaNoSecret – interesting stats you provided. You got me to thinking so I looked up the entire state. Found a total of 6367 sb’s that have profiles (all ages). Of that, I found 4675 in my preferred age range. After that, only 1185 of my preferred race in that age range.

    Obviously most profiles are old, and while still on the site as searchable, they are not active.

  655. Dito23 says:

    @CandyCoated – None taken. My profile gives very little about me and more about my hubbies… makes no mention about fun or money. In any case, I dont intend to settle for just anything. Being mentally stimulated and a none wank”* who is looking to get a night will be a good start. My conclusion is not to spend too much energy in this search. What will be will be. :)

  656. Its not that hard to find guys in atlanta. Just go walk around Phipps plaza in a cute outfit. You’ll find some good guys.

  657. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    @AninaLove I said the exact same thing! There are about 600 SDs in our area and 200 have active profiles and only 10 of those are responding back. lol. Its frustrating. I’ve had two SDs before from Atlanta but I met them both at sporting events not online. Maybe we should log off the laptop and go get dolled up and see the city. lol.

  658. K. says:

    Hey guys! it’s been a while… I am planning a little getaway to Huntington Beach, CA just to relax and catch up on my reading.. anybody from that area would like to meet for a coffee, I’d love to meet some locals :P?

  659. @DorkyGuy- I tottaly got it after I posted…….. lmao.. I got nothing.
    @phoneGuy- Is that a conversation we should be having on the blogs?

  660. PhoneGuy says:

    Oh Jenniebug, I would love for you to pwn me. 😉

    Dorky, Nice reference!

    We should get an SA group and run some heroic dungeons. 😉

  661. DorkyGuy says:

    @jennie~ lol.. mmo’s… epic items… purple… never mind 😛

  662. @DorkyGuy- omgz… I’m lost…..

  663. DorkyGuy says:

    @jennie, if you find such a man, he will be attracted to girls who wear all purple.

  664. AninaLove- Your from Atlanta? When i first started using this site, I was close to Atlanta area. I’ve met alot of extremely sweet guys from there. They were so sincere and ginuine. Keep your eyes open. There are alot of extremely amazing sd’s out there.

  665. I think I need a SD who can be supportive of the fact that I’m a closet nerd. He would need to be able to adapt to the fact tha I can appreciate a good mmo. He would also need to be understanding if I pwnd him in a pvp battle..

  666. Grasshopper says:

    @DorkyGuy ..Yeah..I don’t have to stop at just 2….I could keep collecting SDs until I had a harem…that would rule.

    @Jessie – I wouldn’t ever divulge information to him concerning their names, or anything else. If that is something he would want to know..then I would tell him no. If he’s a true submissive he wouldn’t back-sass me about it, right?..haha

    @Beach_Girl – yes..it does sound like it could be lots of fun…I’m just a bit unsure about it still, because this is definitely unchartered territory for me.

    @Stormcat – Re: Grassy ~ Indeed! But if you find your one true love on one of these forrays for your submissive SD what then. And if that one true love happens to be hard working but broke, which do you go for? Love or money!

    If finding true love was my goal..I don’t believe I would be signed up to To SA to begin with. I am a bit jaded..I don’t believe that romantic love can last forever anyways…and that’s the only kind that matters to me..so when the love boat starts to go down..you won’t find THIIS capt. going down with the ship..I’ll be diving off the railing along side all the rats 😉

    @KindredSpirit – Thanks for the heads up. I will cautiously approach this situation..no doubt. This is definitely fetish territory..and just the other night I was wondering if liking sex while wearing my high heels would be considered kinky. “I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore, Toto”..WOWSERS!

  667. Beach_Girl says:

    Good evening Sugars!
    Wow, not many people on tonight… Just when I need the distraction :(
    Hope you are all having a great night!

  668. SouthernGent2 says:

    @AninaLove – Atlanta is a tough town for SA. Not sure why. It goes both ways. You would think the market here would be really good, but its not.

  669. Tina says:

    *Ahem* @ Spot: “that Tina chick”? Really? Humph! (pouts in corner, hides Spot’s favorite bone) nyaaaaaaah nyaaaaaaaaaaah!

  670. KindredSpirit says:

    :( Damn can I kill the blog, or what?

    *Chirp, chirp*

    Toodles, good night. :)

  671. KindredSpirit says:

    Grasshopper~ You are intrigued, sure, but would you really feel comfortable with that sort of “voyeuristic” arrangement? Be careful of how much he asks for and what cuts too much into your comfort zone.

    I once had a man who desired me to flirt, seduce and go down or screw other males out in bars or clubs, all while he watched in the near distance in person. And of course wanted to hear all sexual details of other dates I had without him present. I did not feel comfortable with it (and I had no idea yet at the time how much $ he’d offer me, but sensed it’d be a LOT), and kindly turned him down. I was flattered by him and he was respectful, so I hope he eventually found what would make him happy, but that SB wasn’t me….

  672. ContentSB says:

    @AninaLove — I feel your pain! There are 5 SDs on SA in my city, none of them with active profiles lol. I had a long-distance SD I saw on a monthly basis and it worked out well for a few months. Some men are definitely willing to do long-distance, and there are others who are looking for someone local, but also open to having a SB to travel with. Distance can definitely be overcome :)

  673. AninaLove says:

    I’ve definitley met some bad apples. I have’nt had any problems fending them off though. My biggest issue is really getting them to talk and getting them to be specific about the arrangement their looking for and about the dynamics of how out arrangement should be. I’m a no bs type of person I like to be upfront, honest, yet respectful. I’m pretty persistant and know I have what it takes to be in a successful sd/sb relationship but I’m kinda stuck. I’ve been searching for guys in my area, (ATLANTA,GA), but I haven’t really been searching in other states because I don’t think guys would be willing to deal with a SB who isn’t within his reach. Honestly, I’m kinda bummed! What do you guys think I should do. It’s only so many men in Georgia.

  674. NYG says:

    Thank you for sharing the info.
    I am so low tech and never google anyone. Well I used to not google pots/guys.
    Which was bad.:)
    Coz back then I never new a guy is a Forbes or not.
    Kidding kidding

    You all know I have a simple taste.

    Anyway… I am in a good mood coz I am chatting with a guy who has a google page about him, it is exiting . Even though we might not have any relationship , still it is exiting
    To meet exceptional guys.

  675. I don’t think I’ve ever asked for an allowance. If a guy likes me and wants to do really nice things for me then that’s cool. He shouldn’t feel obligated to pay me an allowance.

  676. PhoneGuy says:

    I hate:
    Seeing a new profile nearby me spring up with a really cute girl who sounds interesting…and an expectation of 10k-20k. :-(

    I like:
    Waiting 3 – 7 days and seeing them lower it after they (presumably) get no responses. 😉

    Anyone else ever notice this?

  677. PhoneGuy says:

    You and me both sugar!

    So what shows you his wealth? spokeo? Do you have a membership?
    Where do they get their info? Have you calibrated it to see how accurate it is?
    I’m very curious how it would know…

  678. VictoriaNoSecret says:

    @NYG the email address was linked to a used car he was selling, and he created a fb profile with it. I then went on spokeo.com and it showed all of his personal info and picture. Once I had his name and address I googled him and saw his most recent arrest and it explained his suspension from work. Thank God for google. lol. Google yourself and see what pops up. It may surprise you. :)

  679. I hate it when some of the girls on the site say that they need a deep connection. Yet they have a $20,000 per mo allowance listed, and their profiles are extremely demanding. I’ve seen a few of these and it just seems like the girl only wants to be connected to a guys American express card.

  680. Emily says:

    I haven’t gotten a Sugar Daddy on this site yet, but there are certain expectations a Sugar Baby should have of any man who contacts her. If a man is indeed a Sugar Daddy, he should be very direct about what he’s looking for from a girl he’s contacting. That way, a Sugar Baby will be able to determine if she’s willing to meet his demands. Then, if they determine they are a possible match in anyway, he has to show his seriousness by placing a deposit on the arrangement. That can take the form of a trip, gift, or cash. From there, you take it one step at a time the way you’d have to in any relationship.
    If you’re some jerk who will tell a girl who’ll fly her up for the weekend without any intention of doing so, then don’t claim you are willing to. Word can spread that you are a lying game player and a complete waste of time. You can be outed as a dickweed.
    Again, show a girl you are serious from the beginning in a concrete way; immediately back your claim of being interested in an agreement with some sort of gift.
    I think this is just common sense, and not unreasonable.

  681. Stormcat says:

    Grassy ~ Indeed! But if you find your one true love on one of these forrays for your submissive SD what then. And if that one true love happens to be hard working but broke, which do you go for? Love or money!

  682. Hmmm. I’m actually thinking about starting to ask my sd’s to just donate to some of my favorite charitys instead of giving me a monthly allowance. I think this would be far more meaningful then making some designer rich.