8 years ago
Entering a Sugar Arrangement


There are tens of thousands of Sugar Babies in the world. Even more is the growing number of new Sugar Babies looking for their first Sugar Daddies. Having a Sugar Daddy brings wonders into a girl’s life, but the Sugar Dating world can also be both confusing and scary.

Don’t Judge a Book by Its Cover

Every Sugar Baby has her fantasy checklist of what her ideal Sugar Daddy would be like. You should never judge a book by its cover, and disregard a man either by his age or even his income. What you should take note of is how he talks, looks at you, and generosity. Sometimes, SDs who make less than 500k give more than one who makes 1 million.

You Can’t Force a Ball Into a Square

Everyone wants something different. If you meet a Sugar Daddy who loves bungee jumping and SNM, but you are more of a wine and kisses kind of girl, don’t force it. Your main goal is to find an SD who can meet your needs and who you can please—not hold back.

The Soft and Hard Limits

Perhaps the most discussed amongst Sugar Babies are the Soft and Hard Rules of an Arrangement. Talk to your SD about what his limits are and share your’s. For example, if he is recently divorced, he may have children who he might ask you to visit with him. Or you can only see him during the weekends and holiday with no weekends because of school. Communication is key to any relationship. To keep the sugar sweet, respect each other’s limits.

Time is Money

Be punctual. Whether it’s to RSVP that you can still make your dinner date, or simply returning a call. On trips, avoid taking an extra hour after saying you’d be done in ten, and always arrive on time for dates. Time is money, Sugar Babes. Don’t waste your Daddy’s or he won’t give any to you!

What do you think every SB should know about starting out?
What worked for you?
Like our tips? Share them!

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248 Responses to “Entering a Sugar Arrangement”

  1. Alexis says:


    Soo I’m really new to all of this and was looking to get some advice on what I should be looking for/wanting out of an arrangement like this. What should my expectations be for a potential SD? What will is main expectations be of me like how should I dress for a date, or will he tell me?

  2. Sugar says:

    @Tanny: Some guys brag and boast about the stuff they have and bought other girls and some do not! I have been on SA since like July and I met one decent guy and we finally met up last week. The other guys were creepy or just insulted me! He is a doctor and he’s married with three girls. He drives a Saturn Aura (he is not a flake, his picture and profile are on the website’s hospital he works for). He did not brag about anything at all! Which I like, but honestly it is really hard to tell if a guy is all talk or not. He seems very nice and on our second date we went to Sephora… He is out of town for the next two weeks for a convention and he wanted to Skype but I really am not comfortable yet with that. One word of advice: tell the SD that you have had a SD before and he will know that you are not someone he can take advantage of. It also gives you a sense of self confidence saying you had one SD before. He may ask “What did you and your old SD do and what was the arrangement?” Then you can tell him “He paid my rent and shopping.” That will give him an idea of ok this SB wants her rent paid and he will have clear idea of what you are looking for. It is hard to not come across as all about the money. Don’t give up! This can be very rewarding! My main sugar daddy owns a Mercedes E class and a Porsche 911, although he is not a doctor he still makes a lot of money (business man). He takes me to the nicest restaurants, has bought me cell phones, MacBook, 3 Louis Vuitton and a wallet, shopping where ever I want. Not trying to brag but just want to show you what’s out there. We did not meet on this site though. He is married and in a loveless sexless relationship. They sleep in different rooms and it’s the typical story of she got fat and ugly LOL He is 56 and I find him very sexy! I have stayed at his house too. Very respectful and he believes that a man should take care of the woman. Don’t give up Tanny!

    QueenB85: I only met one guy on here (see above). We just had a date less than two weeks ago but it seems to be going well. Just be patient. Are you a first time sugar baby? My profile on here states my expectations (I wrote I am not easily impressed and I have high expectations LOL) That’s OK by me because I don’t want a bunch of guys wasting my time. That’s how I feel. Why don’t you get a girlfriend and hit up some nice bars/ fine dining restaurants, that is a great way to meet SDs. Also, many hotels have nice bars where traveling SDs can be there too! You could go alone if you feel comfortable or don’t want your friend stealing your SDs. I actually met my number 1 sugar daddy at a bar and was not “looking for one.” Just be patient.

  3. QueenB85 says:

    Hello. I have been on this site for a few weeks now and am not having much luck 🙁 My profile is viewed quite a bit and the messages I have gotten have lead no where. I am an intelligent person so my profile and messages are clear and concise, I am not greedy or just out for money, I feel like I am an attractive woman, and I am just myself when speaking with someone. I make sure I always send actual messages to pot SD’s and not just winks and I try to make it sound sincere and not just generic. Maybe I am being impatient or my expectactions are too high, but I feel like I should of at least had a few on going conversations or even at least one meeting by now. I am starting to think this isn’t going to work out for me. Should I be patient and let fate work it’s magic in matching me with the right SD or is there a better approach I should take? Please give me some advice! Thank you!!! 🙂

  4. Tanny says:

    Hello ladies,

    I just went on my first date with a SD. I’ve been working as well as suporting myself for the last 7years, I’ve never had a man pay a dime for me. I’m a bit confused on how to transition myself and appreciate gestures from others. I’m mainly looking for someone that I can enjoy their company as well as a travel partner-Good conversation. I love meeting new people as well as learning from them. I went on my first date, it was a bit weird and out of my comfort zone. He boasted (about his worth and the things he had as well as things he had bought for other girls.) He did a lot of that, I really was not impressed, my main reason to meet with him was to get to know as a person. I found for a 40 year old man that was very immature. (I could be wrong, since I am new, this could be normal behaviour for SD.) He did also bring up the arrangment question at the end, that caused me to become silent… I really don’t know who he is, I am not willing to make any decisions with anyone until I get to know them. I did let him know that I would really like to get to know him better before bringing up the subject, since it’s still quite early.

    My question, was what I had experience normal behaviour for a first date with a SD. Are they all like this? I would have felt completely comfortable with him if he was genuine with me, I felt as if he was hidding behind his money and the “many” girls he dated. How do you get to know someone when they hide behind that?

    Am I just to genuine and nice for this business? Can someone talk me through how I could of made it less akward, and what you should look for in a SD. This was just a really akward first experience..Could someone help.. 🙂 Thanks.

  5. Lena says:

    One thing sb’s need to worry about on here is pervs, so many will say they are up for meeting and spoiling and when it comes down to it all they want to do is masterbate. Those people make me sick. I want a SD that respects me and understands what type of arrangement they are getting into.

  6. SassyInMass says:

    And back to big cocks! My man at home is a Mangnum XL, so Im always pleased if my side guy has more moderately sized equipment. There’s only so much of that I can take… or want. And in my past experience small guys tend to be much more skilled with their hands n mouths than most mega men. I like alot of action and am quite kinky; so no matter what size youre packing Im going to need (tons) more than just pound pound pound

  7. SassyInMass says:

    Chocolate Heaven- are you writing the emails in all caps like you did here in the blog? If so Id assume theyre not even being read, just erased immediately. Many people associate caplocked emails as spam or stock copy/paste text

  8. SassyInMass says:

    Yay Nawty! Trip n friends sounds like a great idea 🙂 hope it brings you some peace and you can clear your mind. Lets hear more abt this ex from the past…

  9. Nawty Molly says:

    Morning everyone! Hope all is well! I will be headed to Hotlanta on the 17th to see an ex of mine from 16 years ago! This will be an interesting trip..LOL! 😀

    I need to get away for a couple of days. I’m looking forward to catching up with some old friends….and Waffle House. 😀

  10. sassyteacher says:

    @SassyInMass and @Tina: thank you for the info and the encouragement. I’ve just reposted on Don’t Get Taken.


  11. Tina says:

    @Sassyteacher : don’t worry about the age issue – take a quick look at the newest blog topic (Don’t Get Taken) and post there. Midwest SB is a non-traditional age SB, and is a wonderful mentor! She’s also been successful, so a chat with her may help lift your spirits.

  12. SassyInMass says:

    Wow another Sass! Hi and welcome! This blog seems fine with off topic questions whatever the original post is, so no worries. But youll get the best response asking on the most current post the blog has up as more regulars will be there posting when you are. Even the youngsters get the one night offers, hang in there! SA can be hit n miss; and then one day youll have 5 emails from good potential sd’s

  13. sassyteacher says:

    am an attractive, sexy high school teacher from Quebec. I am 45 years old and am a little discouraged with regards to the kind of interest that I am receiving. I am getting emails and winks, etc. but I think that most of the men must think that I am desperate and so are simply offering a one-niter for cash. Or, is this the norm? I am polite when I refuse them and then wish them good luck. Am I looking through rose-tinted glasses in thinking that I may meet an interesting man on this site who would be interested in a woman of 45? I have been someone’s mistress before, which was great! We also had a sexual chemistry that left me breathless. I was very lucky. It was fun, stimulating and naughty! It lasted for close to 5 years and has recently ended because of his ill health. We are still friends. I hope to find the same here but I’m not so sure that it’s going to happen.

    I have my beauty to offer a man, although not the youth, but I do have the education, intelligence and elegance that my previous SD adored.

    Should I be patient?

    Thank you for your feedback.


    P.S. I also erringly posted this on the SB exit plan, which, I think, was not the appropriate blog topic.



  15. blue eyed beauty says:

    As I recently said to my sd who is older thus ‘it’ doesn’t always do what it’s ‘you’re like a man who has lost one of his senses-the others just become more accute’ and that’s just fine by this gal. I have toys and will travel. :-p

  16. JustAThoughtSD says:


    Don’t fear the Hammer, I’ll start you out with just the handle if you like. 😀

  17. Carar says:

    Hi everyone – first day in here – and reading like a crazy in the blog posts! 😉 Great post btw – I have a lot of questions and feel excited at the same time. It’s like finding the perfect dating site, as I don’t have time to a regular relationship and have always preferred older men!

    Well – see you in here another time! 🙂

  18. Stormcat says:

    VASD ~ Do you mean sort of like the aliens in the movie “Earth Girls are Easy?”

  19. Tina says:

    @VASD: oooohhhh tell me more….. 😉

  20. VASD says:

    …with the action of an anteater…

  21. VASD says:

    @CaliSB and @Tina Yeah….but I gotta tongue like a cow.

  22. VASD says:

    @ow How about a little better balance between what you like and want vs. what you bring to the table and want to do for/with him?

  23. EllenSugarB says:

    hahahahahaha…you guys are great!

  24. Tina says:

    @JaTSD: uh hum, I’m NOT someone you just “settle” for thank you so much. 😛 And I’m not the one that started the size posts 😛 You’re not that far from me, really, if I have your location correct in my head.

    Yeah, “God Hammer” is NOT what I’m exactly looking for in a bed partner. Eeeeeeesh!

  25. JustAThoughtSD says:

    However, getting “Mjolnir, Hammer of the Gods” tattooed on it seems arrogant and scary all at the same time.

  26. JustAThoughtSD says:


    Oh well. I guess I’ll have to settle for you and your minion. And you’ll have to settle for me and something the size of minion (a full grown one, of course) without a tat of MtRushmore *WINK*

    P.S. – Simply playful banter, we don’t have to reopen the size posts again.

  27. JustAThoughtSD says:

    @ OW

    Personally, I think you need to read some of the previous blogs. There’s good info in there. So many sb’s have asked this question. I’d start with the ABC Interview blog in May(?) of this year. Once you get up to speed on putting your best foot forward, several people would be willing to give more a more detailed review.

  28. Tina says:

    @JaTSD: good luck, I haven’t seen the Dorkster on here for months, and his profile isn’t active on SA any longer (even with the name he changed it to). Doesn’t even drop y the blog to say howdy any more. Phooey. 🙁

  29. ow says:

    Can somebody please advise me on where i am going wrong? I’ve been on SA for two months and have only attracted timewasters so far (1125475)

    Thank you

  30. JustAThoughtSD says:


    Will have to look up DorkyGuy.

    The joke when i was coming up, was the guy with “Shorty” tatted on his penis. At full extension it supposedly read Shorty’s Bar & Grill, Street Address, State, Zip

  31. DULCE says:

    Yummy talk… All I’m gonna say is that a tight p*$$y doesn’t need a big c*** to please.

  32. Stormcat says:

    JustAThoughtSD ~ Have you heard about DorkyGuy? He has a tatoo of Mt Rushmore that only shows up when he has a full on erection! I’m in awe that anyone could maintain such a state for the length of time that it takes to get a tatoo!

  33. Stormcat says:

    JustAThoughtSD ~ I can’t stop laughing after your post!

  34. Tina says:

    @JaTSD: you’re FUN! I like you! 🙂

  35. JustAThoughtSD says:


    You are truly a man among men. With a penis like that, ferraris drive you around to show off instead of vice versa. I think I saw your last date in the ICU when i when I was doing charity work at the hospital. I was wondering if you actually pass out once it reaches full extension?

  36. Stormcat says:

    Cali SB ~ you are amazing! I love that you had the “balls” to bring up this topic!!! I guess that all guys would love it when they show themselves and the woman responds with “what a nice package you’ve brought to the table.” But if it’s a lie they’ll know. Stamina is important too. A 6″ circumference 10″ long c**k takes a lot of blood and a healthly cardio to pump up and keep hard for any length of time. I guess that’s where the girl’s sexiness comes in. (OMG!!! I can’t believe I just said that given that some woman who thought they were God’s gift to men weren’t able to work that wonder on me.) All I know is that if you can quicken my heart you’ll know you’ve been penetrated!

    Do I really want to post this? Oh WTF

  37. JustAThoughtSD says:

    Object in mirror is larger than it appears. As you were growing up comparing yourself to porn stars, you didn’t realize that some of the girls were only like 4’10” and 87 lbs. Even cocktail wienies look like Ron Jeremy under the right circumstances. So give yourself a break, and try not to stress.

  38. JustAThoughtSD says:

    @California SB:
    Somehow I missed your post re: creepo or stalkerish. I can’t say I give enough of a shit to be the stalker type. Maybe I’m more creep…or just a BIG DICK. And alot of it depends on her vibe, I like to go with the flow. Maybe I was too fast, or too slow. Who knows? She went silent, so lets just go with the i’m a dick idea. I’m actually ok with that.

    re: Big Dicks
    Ok, so if the guy comes out packing vienna sausage, and you like the guy. You can just smile and say something like “let’s see if we can get this ready”. Or something easy going. Then, smack it up, flip it, rub it down, OH NOOOO. If he’s already stressed about his size, you’ll run the possibility of shrinkage as well. Focus on his face, and better parts of his body.

    Personally, I still have that “uneasiness” when I’m first with a girl. I never know what she thinks “above average” is to her. Or if she’s going to say something stupid.

    Girl: “I went out with this guy w/10 and a half. The end was the size of a toddler’s fist.”
    I didn’t know what to think, and was relieved that we never met in person.

    Me: “So what do you think?”
    — Girl: “It’s big don’t know if I’ll be able to work with that.”
    Me: “That’s a good thing right?”
    — Girl: “Well, size isn’t the only thing that matters.”
    Me: “Would you rather if i kinda shrink it down a bit?”
    — Girl: “You can do that?”
    So, now without trying, obviously, there was a size change, as I tried to figure out how the f*ck I fell into OppositeLand.

    Unpredictable affects to masculinity, may cause direct changes in penis size.

  39. Tina says:

    @California SB: he didn’t lie, VASD is hung like a horse from what I hear, it’s just a miniature pony 🙂

    @VASD: just kidding my dear. 🙂

  40. California SB says:

    VASD: “I’m hung like a horse”

    Damn… it got me excited for a second until I read the rest of the sentence… 😛

  41. ContentSB says:

    @NC Gent — Yay! I think a shareholder Packer sugar party would be the BEST kind ever!! Even if it ends up being just a party for two 😉

  42. VASD says:

    @CaliSB and others here discussing the size of power tools… I personally don’t have an issue with CaliSB expressing her preferences, especially here of all places. She likes what she likes, and if she’s just not going to be into him on a sexual level because of his equipment, then so be it. Good for us guys to hear things like that and that it is indeed a consideration for some ladies. And better that she not try to reconnect and try again if she already knows what she likes and that he ain’t got it. A surefire recipe for disappointment and likely further hurt feelings. Nothing but his ego says they couldn’t remain friendly (although would be a long shot).
    Of course, I would like all the SBs here to know that I’m hung like a horse…
    Kidding, kidding, very much average dimension plumbing.

  43. Circe says:

    @CalifSB: Good on you for knowing what you like sexually. Many women in our culture still have this idea that we are not allowed to obtain sexual satisfaction and are shamed into not knowing our own bodies.

    I actually don’t find genitalia that much of a turn on to begin with; male or female. Just seeing it doesn’t typically do a thing for me.

    But with that guy who was small, I wonder if he would have been comfortable with strapping one one from time to time in order to satisfy your urges. I wonder if this could be one of those scenarios when you could send him an email apologizing for your initial reaction or something of that sort. If you two really had a connection could it be worth giving it another go? Or is that a big SD/SB no-no?

  44. Amor says:


    I have a problem about this Sugar Dating, everyone speaks about arrangement but no one openly talks about sex.

    For me, I don’t want to have sex with my Sugar Daddy, because I am a virgin. I just want to travel and have fun with him, maybe kiss.

    Do you think I can find a Sugar Daddy who would not ask sex from me? I am very tense about this.



  45. VASD says:

    @traveler @Phoneguy and others talking about age differences. I’m in my late 40s and have met many much younger ladies through SA that are genuinely turned on by older men. I had a weekend fling last Spring with a 22yo college senior who confessed to me, “I’m just really sexually attracted to much older guys. It’s kind of embarrassing–I can’t even talk to my friends about it.” I have dated women across a wide age range (when I was 21, had a 32yo ladyfriend), but since I’ve been doing the SD thing, most (not all) ladies I connect with are in their mid-twenties.

  46. NC Gent says:

    @Content — it is a deal — we can have our own sugar party at the shareholders meeting. All others who have shares in the Packers are welcome to come 😛

  47. Treasured says:

    Am I the only one who is turned on by a person and not the size of his cock? If I desire someone, and actually get to a stage of seeing one’s cock, it’s size is the last thing on my mind 😀

  48. California SB says:

    Content SB: “I got SO turned off because it reminded me of a 12 yr old boy”

    Thank you, dear. How can anyone be turned on by small is beyond me, Just as I KNOW FOR A FACT guys are just as turned off by heavier girls. I have a male friend who loves bigger girls as well as there are ,apparently, many girls here who don’t mind small cocks. Well I ain’t one of them LOL.

  49. EllenSugarB says:

    Wow, CaliforniaSB sure gets picked on a lot…blog topic after blog topic…she likes ’em big, so what. Actually she likes to be “effed and left for dead.” Great visual, Cali. You did ask “how do I fake not being disappointed about the size?” I wouldn’t advise faking anything. I don’t think you’re a pro (right?), so why would you fake something – that sounds like “selling out” to me. But you could have some empathy for men, in general. – that would be effective. If you don’t have a genuine interest in the man, my guess is that he will pick it up, and not get it up. There are so many things that contribute to sexual challenges (stress, preoccupation, they’re tired, nervous, drank too much lol) part of being a good partner is being patient and understanding, and working on it together. I wondering if he said “the arrangement wont work out” simply because he didn’t function at the time, or because it seemed to him that you don’t really give a sh!t.

    My experience has shown size to be irrelevant to being satisfied.

    Regarding men not complaining about SB body parts – – maybe not on the blog, but I’he heard a LOT of criticism about other SB bodies/appearance from SD friends of mine. I try to not be judgmental when they say things like this to me, because they obviously trust in me enough to confide in me whats on their mind. But I have to vent, on here, that I always thinks it reflects poorly on them when they talk that way about people. Then it makes me look at them more scrutinizingly and all of their little flaws that I didn’t notice become magnified. Funny how that works.

  50. Stacy says:

    Thanks!!!! So glad to be validated in my fury over the $100!!! Insulting, inappropriate, and tacky – he needs to be trained so he doesn’t do this to other SB’s – I guess I need to look at it more business-like in the future until the arrangement is finalized, that’s unfortunate!

  51. travelersb says:

    I know I might be really old fashion, but I don’t like to discuss ”what I’m into” to someone I don’t sexualy know. Firstly, what I’m into is different with each person. Secondly. sex is not fun when you don’t know who the person is, what his personality is. And it is simply not appropriate sometimes to talk about it. I feel insulted when a guy ask me ” What I am into”. Why do they want to knoe that? why don’t they want to learn to know who I am before asking that? Is that sooooooo important? Well, yes it is, but let’s discover it slowly. That makes all the fun of it.

    Also, about picture. This is just gross. We hate picture collectors or guys who asks for nude pic. Most of us , girls, we keep complaining about them. So why would we have the right to ask a pic of they equipment?!?!? wow, this is just the worst idea I heard. This is a dating site, not adult friend finder or whatever other kinky site. Ok, I know, to everyone his thing, but, I cannot go into that game personally and I am sad there are not more people like me.

    @Calisb – And Seriously, I have never seen a comment from a sd here on the blog who came here to say about a date that ” she had oh so many stretch marks or that her boobs were too low or that they were too small or whatever”. It would have been hurtful to many girls. So why Cali sb do you come here saying that a guy had a small cock? Didn’t you think it would be disrespectful to many people? It’s disrespectful to every men, even to guys who haave a big one and want a person to be interested in them for who they are and not sex. Whatever, I’m not your mom. I won’t teach you what is respect tonight.

  52. ContentSB says:

    Ok….I have no idea why I’m going to add my two cents to this topic…but I am :p I’m torn on the issue…I totally understand what you ladies are saying about the performance level and capabilities of men with smaller packages. However, I know exactly where you’re coming from @CaliforniaSB. In my sluttier days, I brought a guy home from the bar, we had our jeans off, and started having some fun with a little dry humping…except I quickly felt how small he was and I got SO turned off because it reminded me of a 12 yr old boy lol. Game over. So, sometimes I think size matters.

  53. travelersb says:

    yes they can do that with a small one, CaliSB and they can use toys and play spychological games and… yes, there are so many things to do.

  54. travelersb says:

    Wow Calif SB! next time, give him a chance. common… you just never know what he can do with that.

    Once, my ex boyfriend, we had been dating three weeks before we had sex. I was wishing so much that the sex would be good. Then when I saw his cock, it was minuscul. I thought to myself ” ok, let’s just do it to since I’m here and I will not call him again cause well… sex has to be there” and 30 secondes after, he was inside of me and I was thinking ” oh wow! I want this lover for months and years if It works” because he was just really good. So seriously, give them their chance. my two cents…

  55. California SB says:

    Well, I know well there is more to sex than size… but to me personally, not trying to offend guys with small tools but size matter to me. I’m the type who loves to be taken rough and hard by a big c*ck, leaving me for dead :P. And no matter how you guys are gonna argue…. you just can’t do that with a small one.

  56. Tina says:

    re: bringing a friend to a meeting (I’ve already commented, but I have to add): the reason I said “no” is due to what Phone Guy alluded to – the perception of maturity. For myself, I am a grown ass woman and can handle my own dates. What happens between me and a man of my choice is between me and said man. Not even my best of friends are invited into the bedroom. I do have girl talk for advice, but only for the less intimate issues. There are just some things that are between me and him.

    @Phone Guy: wellllllll, you DO have mail that you haven’t responded to, you naughty man! (And you’ll have to ask WCSD for the invite for the hockey game, since he invited me 🙂 )

    @Jack – A threesome hockey game with WCSD and Phone Guy? OooooOOOOOoOOOOOhhhhh I have chills at the thought! 🙂

  57. flyr says:

    Bringing a second woman to the first meeting. ……………

    If she is needed because of safety you have the wrong potential SD, too little research or the wrong meeting place.

    If the SD is married it exposes him to another with some potential unintended consequences. There’s also the issue of business relationships.

    I guess I could see a situation where a first time SB might want to bring her also SB mentor along to help read the tea leaves and act as a facilitator….However an SB relationship is an adult activity.

  58. flyr says:

    Following CIRCE’s comments on expectations

    I think a number of the younger SB’s are prone to toss in a comment like “open to anything” without fully considering how it might affect expectations.

  59. flyr says:

    @California SB ” To avoid that situation happening again…. how do I pretend not minding his equipment is small? I don’t want to have to ask got a c*ck pic before meeting.”

    Self selection – take an 8.5 x 11 sheet of paper

    lay it in landscape mode

    starting left to right divide it into three columns


    scan and send to your Pot SD for self screening

  60. Circe says:

    Okay…CalifSB has me on a thing now so I’m going to just start rambling…

    I find it quite unfortunate, the way we present sex to each other in this culture. Heterosexual couples, particularly the more vanilla ones, never seem to have those conversations that NEED to happen before you become intimate. The gay men, lesbians and kinky folk of this world figured this out a long time ago, but simply because this question was essential before getting down to things. What question is this you are wondering? Behold, I will offer up my wisdom for the benefit of my fellow human beings.

    “What are you into?”

    Simple I know, but essential. As I said in my previous post, there is far more to sex than boy-part-goes-into-girl-part (BPGiGP), but the hetero’s have always just automatically assumed that BPGiGP is all there is to it and that it is expected. However, the gay men figured out long ago that you have to ask this question before you hook up with a guy because that could mean the difference between a hot night and a hot mess. Don’t be afraid to ask what your SD is into. Also, try to know what you are into as well. The younger gals may not know everything that does it for them, but hopefully you’ve been practicing long enough to have a basic understanding of your bodily reactions. Not only will this open the door to a hot discussion about your mutual turn-on’s and fantasies, but it also allows for potentially awkward moments to be avoided by getting it out in the open first. You have a chance to hear about your partners foot fetish before hand and mull it over; rather than in the heat of the moment being asked to lick his big toe.

    Please forgive me if this topic is considered taboo on the SA blog forum but I feel it’s important. Be well all. Enjoy your time on this Earth and enjoy your time with each other; regardless if you are strictly BPGiGP or if you like to grab the Hitachi.

  61. Circe says:

    @Jack: That’s okay. I’ll be indelicate for you.

    @CalifSB: Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but women with partners who have significantly smaller size penises consistently report higher levels of sexual satisfaction than their counterparts with partners possessing average to “large” ones.

    I don’t know how small you are talking, but I’ve seen a small one here or there. Here’s the thing, the guys I have known who are smaller KNOW that they are smaller and are willing and more than able to make up for it in other ways. I know of a guy whose wife is totally happy with their relationship and he is smaller (btw…the technical term is “micro-penises”…horrible I know!). Every so often she just wants to be drilled so, because he is totally comfortable with who he is he will strap one on and go to town. That’s love right there. Just warms the cockles of my heart.

    So, if this happens again, just remind yourself that you will be one of the lucky women to have a partner that KNOWS there is more to sex than boy part-goes-into-girl part.

  62. ContentSB says:

    @NC Gent — Let’s go next year and I’ll find/screen SBs for you, and you can find/screen SDs for me.

  63. Grasshopper says:

    Haha! I said “cock”, too, didn’t I! ;x

  64. Grasshopper says:

    @CA.SB – Re: Cock pics – Well..it’s not too much to ask when you really think about it. If you two have aready decided to go for it, then it’s only a matter of time that you will see each other’s junk in person, anyway; asking to see his naughty pic(s) can be depicted by you as just wanting a sexy photographic appetizer (but what he won’t necessarily get is that you’ll be using those pics as an additional screening tool).

    Haha..I said “tool”!

  65. Jack says:

    Hiya, BlueEyed Beauty,

    Yes, I know I’d be in trouble if you lived closer–but based on your last paragraph, looks like you got yourself an awesome guy, perhaps more locally. Wish ya the absolute best!

    I too like RussianSB’s comments very much, and frankly, despite different cultures, I think her comments are quite relevant to us Americans, and Canadians as well, methinks.

    I think the mix of men/women/money/power/sex probably plays out not that differently regardless of cultures. And although I have not been to Russia, my wild guess is that it has “Westernized” (not always a good thing) a lot in the 23 years since the Soviet Union fell.

    As to CalifSB’s indelicate question, I ain’t touching that one with a 10-foot pole–nor with a 6″ rod. Ladies, get your minds out of the gutter!


  66. NC Gent says:

    Phoneguy — yes you do actually own a share of stock (and no it isn’t just a piece of paper as you suggest – the board had to approve the issue) that is worthless from a FINANCIAL point of view. Content and I aren’t idiots and we knew that going in. However, not everything in life I do is for financial benefit, probably just like everyone here. As Content pointed out, we did it for other reasons. For example, it is great to put in my profile that I am part owner of a NFL football team! Plus you get to go to the shareholder meeting , which might be a great place to meet a sweet SB – Just sayin!

    p.s. I really didn’t put that in my profile 🙂

  67. California SB says:

    I went out on a date with a new POT SD the other day, got along great etc etc. Last night was our first night together. But when he takes his underwear off….. let’s say his equipment was not the biggest in town. I was clearly so disappointed he noticed it and couldn’t even get a hard on. It was a disaster and needless to say, he told me the sugar relationship wasn’t going to work. To avoid that situation happening again…. how do I pretend not minding his equipment is small? I don’t want to have to ask got a c*ck pic before meeting. 😛

  68. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Fantastic invite Russian SB

    Hopefully one day I will. It certainly sounds like there is so much to see.

    I will put it on my bucket list.

    LV x

  69. ContentSB says:

    @Phoneguy — Oooook. I’ll agree that being a shareholder of the GB Packers is more sentimental than anything else. However, I could have attended the shareholder meeting this past summer had I wanted to. I know my vote counts for *very* little, but technically I still have one. Regardless of that, it’s pretty bad ass to be part of the only shareholder owned team.

  70. RussianSB says:

    @Lady Vuitton – oh, British lady said I have good English ! Thanks !
    And I improove my English reading your posts, guys, it is mix of modern language and slang – priceless experience. I love to share my sugar experience, but I aways will have different point of veiw – I live in a different world with different dating traditions , and my opinions not always sound popular, but nobody should be offended, becose I am from wild country with beers and gypsies dansing with balalaikas at Red Square. It is how some Hollywood moovies (not all) represent Russia. Moscow today one of the World Capitals – nice shops (every existing brand) , nice cars, best restorants, beautyful ladies, and, of course, new-rich SDs. And we have more cool concerts that any city, World Stars love Moscow – payment only in cash and no taxes (no law for concerts and performances). Welcome to visit !

  71. blue eyed beauty says:

    I love older men and I never say never. Love can be found anywhere if that’s what you are looking for. Personally I would avoid loving someone who didn’t feel the same way about me. That just SUCKS!!!! And I would never presume I could make a man leave his wife for me nor would I try to. Say what you mean and mean what you say and it should all work out.

    @jack – if I only lived closer. You would be in so much trouble 😉

    @stormcat – interestingly enough you and I have a.lot in common.

    Tardiness is just rude without a good excuse. Disrespectful and speaks volumes. Those are the pebbles that fall before the brick hits you upside the head. Pay attention.

    Pot new sd has sent flowers to my new apartment after inquiring about favourite colours, offered to pay for movers to new apt., arranged for a reloadable credit card all before meeting me. Now THAT’S what I’m talkin’ ’bout!!!!

  72. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Hello Everyone!

    A question : On average how long did it take for you to find and start your first SD or SB relationship?

    RussianSB your English is great. Always enjoy your posts. You always make some interesting comments along with many others on here.

    How everyone’s weekend was great.

  73. Treasured says:

    Hi all 😀

    Well, my SD just informed me, that due to changes in personal circumstances, he can’t afford me anymore (unfortunately). He will still be with me for the next two months and we are still friends 🙂

    BUT, that means I am back in the candy store 😀

    And, question to the GURU!!! I am a college SB, but, living in Europe, I don’t have an .edu email. Can send a picture of my student card… HOW do I do that.

    Thank you for your help!


    PS: Not to all new sugars, DO keep a few SDs in the “making”, ie – men who are NOT, yet CAN become your next SD. Makes life less stressful! :)))

  74. bella says:

    @Jack,your very right,sugar dating is much cheaper than the risk of a divorce lol and i am not surprised you had a lovely time with the girls you met,that’s how it works,sugar babes are fun all round,if you keep it at sugar level that is 🙂

    Oh i wouldn’t be good at protecting you physically,perhaps emotionally lol,i am far from a kick boxer,very slim and very feminine,if caught in such a situation,i think i would melt the attacker with my smile….

    And i wasn’t saying all sb’s fall in the scammer category,i meant that if you get emotionally involved,there is a huge chance you’ll get hurt or disappointed,if kept just as sb/sd i am telling you, you will have the time of your life with these girls and yes your a big boy,but i have seen big boys come here and cry about how they have been hurt,so big boy or not we still can be mislead,oh and i am a big girl too but i have been caught out a few times 🙂 but life is all a gamble,so why not take a chance and learn from it,maybe i am just too careful,i choose not to find love on a sugar site,but if that ever happens,il let him know that the sugar has to flow with or without love,that way i won’t be misleading him and we both would be happy,as i would be serving him some cream tea too as a daily bread 😉

  75. RussianSB says:

    @Phone Guy – but it is not serious – to switch your attenion from your date to her friend.
    Disrespect – to invite someone you are interested in , and switch just like that, you have hundreds girls to choose around, why her girlfriend? Your date is interesting in you, while her companion don’t like sugar, have boyfriend or a lesbian :)))) In woman opinion it is same crime, as if you are already have a GF and take her to dinner with you friend, or bussiness partner and they have chemistry. Not very nice. Disrespect.
    I don’t care about funny pictures and strange profiles boys make, I am not screening much that part, becose person not experienced in internet dating will make such mistakes,
    but first meeting, and it is very good idea to bring hot girl with you and make fun.
    Red flag, Sugars, if he switch, no excuses. And my girlfriends, same as I will do in the company of their boys – not sending flirting signals, such as : touch their hair, or show any interest in my boy.

  76. Jack says:


    Looks likePhoneGuy wants to do a threesome with you and WCSD–to go watch a sports event, that is! LOL.

  77. PhoneGuy says:

    If you meet an Sugar Daddy who loves bungee jumping and SNM
    What is SNM? Oh, did you mean S&M? 😛

    @Content and NCGent,
    That’s funny. I actually decided to look up exactly how the whole Green Bay stock thing worked earlier today. My opinion is that if you can’t make money, get any benefit or exercise any control, you don’t actually own stock. You have a piece of paper as a thank you for your donation. Not that I wouldn’t donate to my favorite team. I just wouldn’t pretend I own part of the team. Just sayin.

    @all of you considering bringing a girlfriend with you to a meet.
    I wouldn’t tell a pot she can’t. I don’t think it’s the best way for two people to get to know each other. I think that level of apprehension does speak to the SB’s maturity and past experiences though.
    It is sign (red flag) – that guy is not serious.
    I love when other people tell me when i’m serious. That’s funny.

    @Everyone worried/cynical about an SD finding a real connection on this site
    Well, I find hard to believe a gorgeous 27 year old would be interested in a aging 55 year old other than the sugar component.
    A lot of girls have spoken up about liking older guys. I assume the huge majority of women on this site are at least neutral on dating an older guy. If they are doing something they really don’t like…for nothing but the money…well there is a name for that. 😉 I don’t know how you would get past the meet and greets and into an arrangement if you don’t find the person interesting or compelling in some fashion.
    but after a while she will be licking the last cream and you thinking,what just happened
    @bella, these are smart, worldly guys. They know exactly what happened and it is far from the last creme. Next!

    Purdue grad and Wings fan?! Be still my heart! <3
    Can I join you and WCSD for that hockey game in Dallas?

  78. Tina says:

    @JaTSD: good luck with your pot tonight! Keep your rod in check (at least at first). If she whips it out, just keep swimming swimming swimming…..

  79. RussianSB says:

    @Twiceshy Oh, COME ON ! How to protect poor Sugar Daddies….oh-oh-oh(Jewish oh)
    My ex SDs – all of same kind, they are those ”old sharks”, ”or old dogs” (again my poor English !), they have been everywhere, done everything. Monsters, killers in bussiness, see any person like X-ray, know EXACTLY what everyone want from them. They have que of people everyday at their office doors to ask money for investment. I even not try to play games with them. And here we are : some shallow student with cute face , and newringtone/MTVshows/chewinggum in her head scam big boy for few k + Prada purse,
    and go back to her young boyriend/husband/alfonce/bimp,
    what a disaster ! Just forget about, she deserve the lifestyle of her choice !
    Put that like a charity expences – to help young and not very clever people.
    But I prefer use your money (truth, no games with money), grate connections (priceless),
    travel only 5-6 stars hotels, see the world, go to the best partys with rich and famous long-long time . And who will win ? I am alredy won, I am clever Jewish girl. Only marriage, or SD ”contract” – everything else I leave to scoolgirls and collegebabes (age is excuse).

  80. JustAThoughtSD says:



    You guys enjoy your nite and wish me luck with this new pot sb. *NO FLAKES* Elvis has left the building.

  81. Jack says:

    Hello Travelersb–hope life is treating you well!


  82. Jack says:

    Hi Bella,

    Thanks for your kind concerns and admonitions regarding my well-being. Believe me, I am a big boy and I think the likelihood of getting hurt here is low–probably lower than through traditional dating. I think you are waaay incorrect to say that the chance of getting hurt is 99.9%.

    I have enjoyed meeting and hanging with almost all of the women I have met through here, and with the exception of one very unpleasant lady, I think they have all enjoyed their time with me (although maybe they all fooled me into thinking that!).

    I appreciate your offer to “protect” me–are you a good kickboxer or a crack shot? LOL. If you want to tell me about your specific “protection” skills(LOL), feel free to contact me via my profile (989322).

    All kidding aside, given the fact that sugar only flows while the SD is satisfied, what’s the worst that can happen? Being out some money, which is of little consequence (especially compared to the millions of dollars of damage that my divorce did to my businesses and pocketbook), or having certain expectations not met. But the latter is simply part of life, and after nearly 25 years as an ER doc, I think I can handle just about anything that is thrown my way.

    In sum, I can say that I have enjoyed the ladies I have met here and although I am sure there are some, I do not feel that most SB’s fall in the scammer/fake category.


  83. Tina says:

    @ Dory/Bruce: I may have to be a guinea pig for your invention. I quite enjoy realistic rods 🙂

    Hmmmm, that’s an interesting question. I think my favorite is still Toy Story. It’s just…..classic, and touching, and when I was little I LOVED my Mr. Potatoe Head 🙂

  84. JustAThoughtSD says:

    I’ve got the patents. Anything else is just a cheap knock-off. I put the full description on one of the older blogs. 😀 The one you have probably works on batteries, and doesn’t come with all the features.

    re: D.Me
    so which one IS your fave kiddie/disneypixar movie?

  85. Tina says:

    @JaTSD: IT’S SO FLUFFY!!!!!!! And it’s actually not one of my favorite movies, although it DOES rank up there. I really want to see the next one out 🙂

    Amazing fun rod eh? I think I have one of those around here somewhere….. 😉

  86. JustAThoughtSD says:


    slipping up from behind, of course, I’m just trying to plug in my AMAZING FUN ROD remember it will accomodate to all your sockets …please bear with me though, I’m trying to test the new spin feature.

    Re: Nemo and D.Me
    yes fan of anything that my kids like… fyi we did a teaparty like the one in your fave movie

  87. Tina says:

    @twiceshy: …..and that’s why he’s the Guru……..

  88. Tina says:

    @JaTSD aka Bruce aka Dory: oooohhhh, slipping up from behind? Now THAT’S more like it!

    And are we a Nemo fan much? (This from the chic with the minion as an avatar)

  89. twiceshy says:

    @Tina , wow!! Thanks for this link, it’s really eye opening to read the stories. He apparently went through the same thing as I did regarding travelling SBs.


  90. JustAThoughtSD says:

    I’m not going to tell you which state, I’ll simply say “the south” and know that you’ve got it. If you don’t figure it out, it’s still ok because I’ll play that jaws music when I slip up on you from behind.

    And remember, “Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming swimming swimming…”

  91. Tina says:

    @Circe: Guru’s blog is sugardaddychronicles dot blogspot dot com

  92. Circe says:

    @Tina and the PtB (Powers that Be): How would I access that blog? I believe a few of you here have blogs and I seem to remember (back in “the day”) that I could click your icon or name and be taken to it but that does not seem to be the case anymore. I’ve tried registering here as well but keep getting an error message. 🙁 I haz a sad.

  93. Tina says:

    @twiceshy: I would definitely suggest checking out SD Gurus blog – he has a lot of wonderful tips for SDs.

  94. twiceshy says:

    @RussianSB lol! Your posts make me laugh, really. You must be great to hang out with 🙂

    As to your posts, yes perhaps a SB may face a threat of physical harm, but I’m just saying that there are risks to Sugar Daddies as well and the scamming and scheming works both ways as I sadly found out.

    Regarding the women that are supposed to be “easy” and willing to do anything…I haven’t found those. Maybe I am clicking wink on ALL the wrong profiles, but the women that I have contacted have been cautious, first – timers, or just not knowing what they want from the whole thing. So, it certainly hasn’t been “easy” for me. Two months in and I’ve met a SB once, wasn’t quite what I was looking for, and been scammed out of thousands on another occasion. I’m open and honest with my interactions and I don’t do any of the things in that blog, so maybe that’s why I’m finding this such hard going lol ! The reverse picture lookup is a good idea though, I’m going to use that definitely 🙂

    I just thought perhaps there should be a bit of balance, and I would have been interested in knowing what Sugar Daddies were doing to protect themselves especially when dealing with out of town (or in my case out of country) Sugar Babies.

  95. Tina says:

    I just had the BEST rainy day lunch! I made pasta with a chicken meatball spinach casserole on top! (Chicken meatballs, spinach, portabella mushrooms, marinara sauce, mozzarella cheese) I also made some butterscotch fudge that is cooling on the counter, but that is for a friend tomorrow since I missed his birthday in July (to my defense, he never told me!) 🙂

    Hey Guru, you ready for that care package yet? 🙂

  96. Tina says:

    @JustAThoughtSD: I’m now nicknaming you Bruce. And the next state over in which direction? Texas has a lot of neighbors, since we’re quite large and in charge 😉

  97. Goldfish says:

    Hello all!

    I’m not new to SA, but have been away from the blog for some years. Things change quite a bit!

    I’m an SB just coming off a sugar relationship in Europe. Before, I had met someone in the States who became my boyfriend of three years. Things ended recently, and I suppose I’m back to where I originally started.

    I don’t know if I’m trying to find that type of relationship again, or just to have that type of caring, but vibrant man in my life for the moment.

    Anyways, anyone else a SB in Europe? The pickings are sparse…

  98. JustAThoughtSD says:

    the jaws theme just hints at my wonderful smile. Didn’t you see all those beautiful teeth the shark had on Finding Nemo? But don’t worry…I’m in the next state over. 😀

    I believe in follow ups on both sides. I’m not used to NSA’s at the moment, and something she said made me think she wanted just a little more traditional approach to things. Even though the silent treatment is annoying, I won’t complain. Too many fish in the SA sugar bowl, and in my immediate surroundings. So, party on, Bill and Ted, party on.

  99. travelersb says:

    This is exactly the place for girls who prefer older men, it’s not only about the money here…. And in real life or on other dating sites, if a younger girl approches an older man, the guy (if he is decent) only finds her weird and he doesn’t believe that she might really be interested.

    Personaly, In my last work, I was often in contact with very sexy men (in my opinion) who were 15 to 25 years old older than me, but I could never accept an invitation or show an interest because I wanted to stay 100% professionnal in my work. Same for them, some did say their interest, but most wouldn’t. All that to say, that I don’t know any better place than seeking for girls who likes older men.

    I remember one girl I was talking with who told me, ” I don’t understand what a good looking, not creepy guy is doing on this site” because a guy like that wouldn’t have to pay for sex. I was shocked. I think that it is her, or people who thinks like her who has it wrong about the essence of SA. Not me. SA or any sugar dating site is for every kind of realtionships and generaly for the girls who are attracted to older men. It has to be geniune. From genuine to love, there is a big gap though… I agree. But who knows? it takes time to built a relationship anyway, a FWB doesn’t become a gf or bf from one day to the other. And love can happen anywhere when we take the time to know someone. Even the most busy person who never invest lot of time in his/her relationship can fall in love. Love will just not necessarly mean marriage or seeing each other every week for that person, but it is still love. In my head, that’s what should be an SD/SB relationship, the ideal one at least.

  100. bella says:

    And i do believe there are women who prefer the older man,with or without sugar,if i was an older man i just would never think of meeting that type here on a sugar site,most are skimming to be secured with a guaranteed security,as much as i love sugar,i hate to see people be ripped off by someone who is fully aware a relationship is not what she wants but will pretend to want that if it will secure her a future,this applies to both men and women,i have seen people hurt this way and it is disgusting,personally i wouldn’t advice any wealthy relative or friend to come on here to find aka ”love” you might find it but the chances of getting burnt the hard way are 99.9 %

    I am on both sugar and match.com LOL

  101. bella says:

    Thats ok Jack as long as you can spot the fakes like you say,remember it a method of operation in this bowl,she still may spot that you want a gf and play to that minus even asking an allowance,it’s a skill some have and without knowing you’ll be hooked thinking,oh how sweet,she adores me,doesn’t even want an allowance etc….but after a while she will be licking the last cream and you thinking,what just happened,i only say this because you do actually come a cross as a lovely man deep down,i can see why Guru kept telling you not to say much about yourself on here,your are too sweet,nice i would hate to see you burnt,i would say just go with the sb/sd thing,you will be safe and in check,i could protect you if i could LOL anyhow you are smart and will be fine.

  102. Circe says:

    As far as this discussion about the age difference and sugar being the only motivating factor in attraction I agree that this may be a component in the choices of some women (not of an evolutionary, simply the forced cultural necessities…but I digress) but not for all of us. In the past I have preferred seeing older men and somewhat older women. Sorry, but George Clooney didn’t get sexy until he had a full head of grey hair and started to “look his age”. And don’t get me started on Patrick Stewart. mmmm..mmm But we are not all attracted to the same things; that’s why there are blondes, brunettes and redheads. And we do not have the same relationship requirements. For some, the bf/gf dynamic is a goal. As long as you’re not hurting the other person (or yourself) go right on ahead and have fun.

  103. Circe says:

    @ JatSD: “I would like all SB’s to note, if we EVER met face-to-face, and you didn’t run away from the table screaming, please be considerate on the day after. I would rather have you tell me to fuck off than to go silent.”

    That goes both ways m’dear. I only recently returned to this site but prior to my little hiatus I had gone on a few meets and each one seemed to go well with the pot SD’s indicating as such in our follow up emails/texts. Only to go completely silent the next day or so.

    SD’s (and SB’s) don’t say you had a great time and are looking forward to meeting again only to ignore the other person from then on out. If you didn’t have a good time or the other person was not what you expected then say as much. Otherwise, you just look like a douche.

  104. Tina says:

    @JaTSD: After reading your post, the JAWS theme is now stuck in my head 🙂 What part of the country are you in (I’m just curious as to what water I need to be aware of 😉 )

    @Jack: I will have to agree with you again. I’m 34, approaching 35, and really not interested in getting married. I personally just don’t see the benefit of it at this time. But, am I open to a serious relationship even if it starts as sugar? Sure. I actually love having a deep connection with someone, and don’t like to put parameters on something that evolves naturally. I think the key of what I just said is that it evolves NATURALLY. Yes, every relationship needs to have communication as to what the nature of it is, but that doesn’t mean that it won’t change as time goes on. That means that the communication has to be present throughout the entire relationship. And many people make the mistake of going into a relationship – traditional or sugar – with exact expectations of what to expect and not being open to something just as wonderful but perhaps different than those expectations.

  105. Jack says:


    I said nothing about marriage in my post–given how the first one went, I highly doubt I will marry again. I see no upside to it. To me, a GF is quite a distance from being married, and the latter is NOT a reason for my being here..

    As to your assertion that some women might pretend to like me but would “never be caught dead with me” without the sugar, I have a few responses. First, I am sure there are some pot SB’s that are exactly like that, and I have come across them. They are usually fairly easy to identify. Second, I realize that “sugar” is attractive to almost all women (not only ones on this site) because of security, comfort, sense of protection issues, maybe even of an evolutionary origin, so I don’t get too concerned about it unless it is the main reason the woman wants to be my GF. If that is the case, again, it’s fairly easy to know, and I might well continue something with that woman if other aspects of that connection interest me, but I will know it isn’t the GF situation, which is more than fine.

    Third, contrary to your opinion, my impression is that these women do not constitute the majority of the 30% I cited, so there are still quite a few women here who genuinely seek a meaningful relationship.

    And finally, and most importantly, although I’d prefer to have a GF/meaningful relationship with a woman I meet here, my profile makes it clear that until then, I am open to lots of other connections. So I think my approach is sane and balanced.

    But don’t we all believe that our approach is sane and balanced? LOL.


  106. bella says:

    my last message was for JACK not frank sorry

  107. bella says:

    @Frank i am with califonia sb,this is a sugar site and yes some girls may say they are open to more a bf/gf but the truth be told,these girls confess that the men they date on these sugar site are the type they would never be caught dead or a live with in real life minus sugar(you get the drift? so tread carefully Frank or else you are bound for even a bigger dirty divorce on these sugar site,be careful and i will say the same to the girls,don’t believe in the ‘love’ game unless the sugar is still flowing because some men trick girls into believing it’s all love yet they just want free ride

  108. Calfornia SB says:

    JustAThoughtSD: Well when I meet a guy that clearly is not going to work, I just tell him the day after by email: “You seem fantastic but I don’t think we are a good match”. I only go silent if the guy is really a creepo and stalker-ish. Hope you’re not the latter. 🙂

  109. JustAThoughtSD says:

    @Everyone – “Spring flings, but Fall’s in Love.” (Romantic thoughts by yours truly.) We hunker down and prepare to cuddle through these winter months, and hope it lasts through the spring and into the next “cuddle season.”

    I always find that fall is my romantic season. And I will tell you my story after making this public service announcement:


    Yes, tis true, JaTSD is back in the pool for now, and my dorsal fin is up (among other things.)

    One day after deciding to be back on the market, I’m communicating with pot SB. Two days later, I get stood up but rescheduled meet n greet. Next day dinner and drinks type of meet and greet. Even though I never expect my meets to be horrorshows, I haven’t been on one in 7 years. Never scared, always prepared…the meet goes swimmingly. With the exception of a few off-handed comments, sometimes I’m a little too open/truthful, the meet was awesome. Now it’s been six days since the meet and since we spoke.

    I would like all SB’s to note, if we EVER met face-to-face, and you didn’t run away from the table screaming, please be considerate on the day after. I would rather have you tell me to fuck off than to go silent. It can be by text, email, carrier pigeon, semaphore, smoke signal, or whatever comfortable non-violent communication that you choose.

    Of course, these are just my thoughts and my humble request…

  110. RussianSB says:

    I am reading that blog and Fake guy write:” More than half of the women on Sugar Daddy sites use their real email addresses ”A-ha.

  111. RussianSB says:

    Yeah, it is called fake sugar daddy blog.It starts with: I am fake sugar daddy and proud of it… But never see the blog Fake sugar baby, so, girls are more naive .

  112. RussianSB says:

    @I LoveWest Coast Girl and @Twiceshy, I am new here and even I find site in the web
    about how to cheat sugarbabes, make empty promices, impress them and use them…
    like that ladies so desperate…they ready to do everything if you will do everything right.
    I agree with Twiceshy that a lot of girls are scamming, want to have support and presents and go away with that on ”platonic” games. But the horror storys girls share here cannot compare with you budget on money and presents for young cute scammers .

  113. I LoveWestCoastGirl says:


    I obviously wrote about guys who trick girls on this site and who are Not generous (coz I was upset after reading Stacy post).

    (some guys would tell you they want you to be a GF, future wife… Long term … Just to have free FAST sex without any financial perks, they come to this site to trick SBs , promise long terms just in order not to spend $ on a girl, plus there are many new, naive SBs who trust a guy then he says he is honest; well fake sugar daddy blog was mentioned here a a few times , and this guy is not the only one out there 🙂 if you are not going to be generous – go to match and try to get the fast intimacy with a 25 years younger girl in there.

    And your experience on Match exactly is a big prove of my theory. 🙂
    if you are looking for a big age difference (15-20 y younger) and you are successful and generous – match and other regular daring sites are not good for you. you are going to waste your time and money in there.

    Yes, you are looking for a GF (or future wife) but you spend thousands monthly on your SBs along the way!! How is my post related to you? do you want it to be related to you? 🙂
    If you want just chat with me , you know my e mail. 🙂 unless you want to be “verbose ” particularly on the blog.

  114. twiceshy says:

    I’m seeing a fair amount of information about Sugar Babies and what makes them comfortable, and not much from the Sugar Daddies.

    As an SD who has been scammed by a SB from this site, I have a bit of a different perspective. There are SBs that don’t live up to their end of the arrangement as well, and some who actively seek to dupe SDs.

    Maybe this will be another topic in the future? 🙂

  115. flyer says:

    @Frank “She has been in financial difficulty the last two weeks, she had 33 OD charges on her bank account, and I gave her extra money ”

    Frank – I think if you read your post you’ll see a pattern……………………

    Sugar and GF/BF relationships – I think we are working too hard to put something into simple definition, while it ranges from a fixation on sugar to wanting only a sprinkle on the side of a very near to real life relationship. There is of course no guarantee that the relationship will not evolve in either direction.

    Age – From the business, political and academic worlds it appears that even in the absence of sugar, people with a substantial age difference can find magic.

  116. California SB says:

    Frank… she is married, so you can’t blame her for not getting back to you. 33 overdraft fees?? Did she ever hear of balancing a check book once in a while? I don’t know but I would never give a dime to someone who can’t even control a simple checking account. But that it’s me…..

  117. Frank says:

    From reading profiles, I would say about a third of them say something about being open to something more than a nsa situation.

    Reading the opening comments about how the sb should be on time, interested in what her sd has to say etc. just made my slow burn turn into an open flame.

    I am about 2 months in my current sb relationship. We meet about once a week, and text each other often during the week. We are both married, so there is little chance for more interaction. She has been in financial difficulty the last two weeks, she had 33 OD charges on her bank account, and I gave her extra money and some good financial advice. Then last week she canceled our meeting on a rather flimsy excuse. A couple of weeks ago a coworker had given her a bear hug and after a week or two her ribs were still hurting so she canceled on me at the last minute. This week I text-ed her and she text-ed back that she didn’t have time she had to concentrate on getting her work done. My comment back to her was “oh”, and she later sorta apologized by saying she would be back to her cheery self soon.

    She knows I am leaving to go out of town tomorrow (on a 7 day bicycle trip, I can’t wait to get away!) and she made no effort to see me or even communicate with me before I head out.

    So my slow burn is starting to heat up!

  118. California SB says:

    I do try finding “big fish” pictures appealing though. It’s growing on me…. the scales, the open mouth… yeah.

  119. California SB says:

    (Beating on the same dead horse)… Why are we on an arrangement site? Yes, we know why. Period.

  120. Ms. New York says:

    I don’t see anything wrong with having a phone conversation before having your first meeting with a SD. I wouldn’t give them my cell number but if they want to talk. I would call them & block my number just to get a feel of what their looking for believe me you talk to a person long enough you will feel whether you should even met them. I wouldn’t bring a girlfriend on a meeting you want that one on one time with that SD. I like to met in a coffee shop its much safer.

  121. Jack says:

    CalifSB, you misread my post.

    I did not say “1/3 of the women who are 27 years old are looking for a 55-yo boyfriend.” In fact, I didn’t mention 27 year olds at all.

    I would agree that in general, the 27-year-olds that are looking for BF’s–even those on this site who are less ageist than general–would be looking in the 30’s or maybe 40’s. But as EllenSugar points out, when she was 26, she had a 55-yo BF. Again, to me it’s all about the individual, not their age. And please note, I discussed “seeking a BF/GF,”–I did not talk about “falling in love” or “marriage” although those can both happen despite a large age difference.

    My comment was that OVERALL, based on reading profiles, meeting ladies and spending some time with some of them, it has become my impression the “looking for BF’s” is way more common on this site than I think most people realize. I posted about this impression because before joining SA, I would have guessed the percentage would have been 3%, not 30%, so this was quite contrary to what I expected. Indeed, no more than an hour ago, I received an email from a 37-yo whose profile was primarily focused on seeking a “lifelong companion”–which is obviously substantially more than a BF/GF.

    I also think you jump to conclusions as to your perception of my age preferences which I would best describe in one word–“none.” I have met and gone out with a VERY mature 19-year-old from this site, and I have dated a 42-year-old from this site whom I like quite a bit (she is just not available right now due to being a single mom, working full-time and suffering the pain of going through a divorce). Nor do I generalize about age-and-bods because I know a fair number of ladies in their 40’s whose bods would put to shame most 20-year-olds. Nor do I care about race because there are some gorgeous, fit, bright and fun women of all races.

    As cliche as it sounds, my bottom line is that each person is an individual, and although there are certain valid generalities in life, there are so many exceptions to those generalities that the generalities are rendered useless. I evaluate each person based on who they are, not their age, race, etc.


  122. RussianSB says:

    @Stormcat , and where I find SD in 4 a.m. ??(Moscow time).
    You just put down my sweet dream + SD feeding me caviar with spoon.
    But in real life I always nursing my SDs(and not becose illness).
    My broken English ! I mean,
    I had flu when I met my first (and I hope not the last ) husband,
    but now I also have flu… Oh, I need to change climate ! Anyway who need always ill
    SB ? About relationship – I accept marriage or sugar contract, everything else is immoral and criminal !!! And about NSA, my pot #1 now is Italian and drama-free (even sound impossible!) and I am Russian – both nations full of drama. I can’t wait for all the drama we will develope from that NSA arrangement :))))

  123. EllenSugarB says:

    California SB – As hard as you may find it to believe, when I was 26, my boyfriend (not SD, real life boyfriend) was 55 years old. It happens.

  124. EllenSugarB says:

    ….Phew ::wipes forehead::…my phone number isn’t on an escort website. Logically speaking, it shouldn’t be on a website because I’m not an escort and I don’t have a website. But being that someone stole my pictures and created a fake profile on THIS site, I thought I would check out the possibility of someone stealing my phone number. Looks like I’m in the clear.

    Stacy – I don’t care if it was $100 o $10,000…leaving it on the dresser is lowly. Sorry that this happened, from what it sounds like it made you feel terrible. Next time, discuss what you are looking for in terms of allowance BEFORE you enter an arrangement. Also, get your allowance at the beginning of the arrangement. Get your allowance before you become intimate to avoid feeling the way that you did, and to avoid the necessity of having to “help him realize” that his $100 is inappropriate in your eyes. I realize that this comment will cause objection among some of you SDs. Thats fine. Do whatever is right for you. This is what has worked for me. In the past I had one SD say “Eventually you’re going to have to trust me.” I replied, “My preference of you providing my allowance before we get close has nothing to do with your trustworthiness, and everything to do with what makes me feel secure and comfortable. ” “Trust” is me being intimate with you, “trust” is me flying on a plane to meet you where you wish, “trust” is me sleeping in the same bed with you, “trust” is the fact that you can ask me anything and I keep no secrets from you.” Never heard that comment from him again.

    California SB – “I would rip his $100 up and throw it in his face.” Funny. I think I would hand it to him and say “Honey, I think you dropped your change.”

  125. California SB says:

    Jack…. ” nearly 1/3rd of the women here are interested in some version of a BF/GF relationship”

    Well, I find hard to believe a gorgeous 27 year old would be interested in a aging 55 year old other than the sugar component. I also find hard to believe that the same aging 55 year old would fall in love for the gorgeous 27 year old for whom she is rather than for her killer body….. so this non sense speak of “I’m looking for love” on an arrangement site… doesn’t cut it for me.

  126. Stormcat says:

    RussianSB ~ No definately not love, probably just lust. That wasn’t the point. It was that if you bring your gf along on a first date you risk that the guy will end up liking her better than you.
    Sorry to hear that you are ill. 🙁 A goosefeather coat sounds nice though. 🙂 What about chicken soup and warm brandy? Or a gentle SD to put hot steamy compresses on your face, brush your pretty hair. then bathe you, carry you to bed and massage away your aches untill you sleep.

  127. travelersb says:

    I prefer to watch football than hockey

  128. travelersb says:

    I think that there is no problem if a guy seeks a girlfriend on SA, as long as he is giving her money for her own personal projects. Money that is spent like a boyfriend would anyway ( dates, days at the spa, money for the unusual expenses that the girl wouldn’t have if she wasn’t dating that guy, trips, etc) doesn’t count in the money for sugar. If a guy seeks a girlfriend for whom he will provide an allowance, I say there is no prob to use Seeking.

  129. Tina says:

    @WCSD: Me + ice = no bueno, but I absolutely love watching hockey. It’s the only sport that I can stand to watch. 🙂 Texas isn’t exactly a hockey state, which I’m ok with, since that means I can get good seats at good prices 😉

    You’re my new blog hero for the week! 🙂 Yeah, I’m giddy! (And watch, there really won’t be a NHL season this year – NUTS!)

  130. WCSD says:

    @Tina – No problem. I love watching hockey (only second to actually playing it), and getting tix in Dallas is very, very easy.

  131. Tina says:

    @WCSD: awwww, you just absolutely made my day! 🙂 And you know that I’m going to hold you to that, right? (Hey, I’ll drive 3 hours to Dallas for a hockey game ANYTIME!)

  132. WCSD says:

    @Tina – Well the next time I’m in Dallas, and the Stars happen to be playing, I’ll take you to a game.

  133. Tina says:

    @WCSD: I know, and this is the second recent lockout for the NHL. I get to go to more lower level games, though, since we have an AHL team here (I think it’s AHL…..geez!) that the Dallas Stars pull up from. They’re not too bad, and pretty reasonable prices. So I still get at least some level of a hockey fix.

    I’ve never been to a NHL game, though, so I don’t know what I am missing. So sad! 🙁

  134. WCSD says:

    The NHL lockout sucks. As a Canadian (and obviously a hockey nut), I’m missing out on using my season tickets. And taking a pot/SB to a Canucks game was always an enjoyable time. My gut tells me there will be no season this year. And I’m not inviting a pot/SB to watch me play in my beer league…now that would be embarassing (to have her see that level of hockey…)

  135. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Happy Friday everyone!

    Is everyone well and ready to enjoy the weekend?

    LV x

  136. Tina says:

    <—- hockey, right here! Oh yeah! 🙂

  137. ContentSB says:

    @NCGent — I live in MN now…so I’m deep in enemy Viking territory. It’s awful. Week 1 of the regular season I was at work, had just seen the Packers had lost, and then had to serve a family DECKED OUT in Viking gear…they had just been at the game where the queens won. It was seriously one of the most painful experiences ever.

    Re: hockey…I think Tina was the one who mentioned loving hockey. I grew up figure skating, so I’d much rather be ON the ice rather than in the stands, but I definitely appreciate watching an awesome fight break out!

  138. northernsd says:

    @NC Gent
    Thanks for the tip on googling cell #’s. I put it to immediate use this morning and googled three #’s and sure enough 2 of 3 went right to a ad for escorts.

  139. Lafite says:

    @Jack: I completely agree with most of your post. The assumption that BF/GF will happen out of SD/SB is inappropriate at the start, but I’d probably not be attracted to SB where that wasn’t at least a vague possibility. I’d never push it on to a SB who clearly didn’t want that either from the outset or during the relationship, but I would probably be fostering opportunities to encourage it if it seemed appropriate.

    My view is that you just never know what’s going to happen, you go into it with your eyes open intending to have fun, to treat the SB with complete respect and make sure you’re both aware that a range of possible endings exist, who knows which of them will materialise.

    I can’t do ‘transactional-only’ relationships – things just wouldn’t happen…..

  140. Tina says:

    @NC Gent: good morning! How is your SB situation going btw? Last I read, things were a little rocky for you. I hope it’s all worked out and that you’re happy again 🙂

  141. NC Gent says:

    Regarding an SB bringing a gf to a first meeting with her… a few years ago, I had a pot-SB bring her bff with her to a first meeting. She cleared it with me ahead of time, and I was ok with it, because I wanted her to feel comfortable. Anyways, we all met and her friend and I ended up dominating the conversation. We tried to engage the pot SB but it just didn’t work…. I wanted to sugar date her bff (awkward I know)… needless to say, things didn’t work out with that pot SB 🙂

  142. NC Gent says:

    @Content — that game was indeed frustrating, and as Circe said, there were a number of calls throughout the game… just made the whole game entirely frustrating. We both are pretty hardcore fans it sounds like — I bought a share of stock for Xmas last year also! I am also a huge hockey fan, but not sure when that is going to break loose. Maybe we should have a sugar meet at a hockey game – that would keep the press out if they had to buy tickets lol

    I think it is super creepy if an SD would ask for a cell number prior to establishing some rapport. Unfortunately, some SBs provide their cell phone in the first email, so I think that gives some SDs the feeling that is acceptable. However, when you google the cell number of the SBs that provide that in the first email, a large percentage of the time you can find an escort ad with that same number posted — maybe a match made in heaven??!!

    Have a good weekend everyone!

  143. Tina says:

    @VASD: I LOVE that quote from her! Talk about an empowered lady! She will be missed 🙁

  144. Tina says:

    @blog gods: please exchange my e-mail with SouthernCharmSB as well as ContentSB. I’m sending you a lot of requests lately – I feel so popular! 🙂

  145. VASD says:

    @Tina I posted a quote from Helen Gurley Brown a couple of weeks back–just after she passed away. “Good girls go to heaven. Bad girls go EVERYWHERE.”

    And, yes, think there’s the potential for something for everyone here. Just be open, honest, live up to your commitments.

  146. RussianSB says:

    @Stormcat , stop to look for love and you find it – it is like mushrooms in the forest – hide from you when you look for them hard. I always go to upscale partys, meet reach and famous, dress fashionable. And meet my ex-husband in street-market place buing pickled cucambers (mother need very special sort for russian salad,save god buy in supermarket) – I was not in romantic mood, have flu and all covered in goosefeather coat – look just horrible, really. It was love.

  147. Tina says:

    @VASD: you naughty, naughty man! 😛 You are a bad influence on a good SB, you know that? And I thought of a quote for you the other day (I have NO idea where it came from): Good girls get clean in the shower, bad girls get dirty.

    @Jack: I actually agree with you and your verbose posting 😉 I don’t think this site has any limitations or expectations on what an arrangement is supposed to be – it’s up to the two people that are in it. For some, the NSA is the most important part, while for others the draw is the non-traditional aspect of the relationship that you stated so eloquently. That’s why the communication is so important in sugar, since the idea of what the relationship is can start, and evolve, differently in every case.

    And happy Friday to you!

  148. RussianSB says:

    @JamaikaMeHappy (not about you Stormcat if you have such e good reputation in Sugar society) it is also good reason to take girfriend to check you guy reaction – sometimes they think that she also ”in the menu” – naive indian boys (my girls having boyfriends and BMWs and they don’t need his ”generouse” allowance ) :))))
    It is sign (red flag) – that guy is not serious.

  149. VASD says:

    @Jamaica Now, if you were to bring the friend along ALL the time…

  150. Flyer says:

    @california SB. “nobody is talking about the party”

    I posted something on exit plan . Recommended a different approach. – hire a couple of the SB who get it, no media cntact, avoid the industrial debutante advertising,

    Hopefully Brandon is reaching out to everyone who attended.

    It’s sad to see defeat being grabbed from the jaws of victory Brandon’s also leaving the door wide open for a more upscale comppetitor. He’s done a great job with the site but seems to be missing a key component.

  151. Jack says:

    ILWCG wrote:

    “So if a guys is not going to be generous with the girls from sugar site and looking for GF experience, or Love, future wife … To me it is cheating the system thing,
    Pls go to the regular dating sites, date girls your age, spend 6 months trying to get even 1 date … ”

    I couldn’t disagree more with the above quote–the substance of which she has posted before as well.

    Obviously, everyone is entitled to their opinion, but I think ILWCG has it all wrong as to what this site (or ANY dating site) is “all about.” I think this site and dating sites in general aren’t restricted to any one person’s view of what the site “should be” about. I believe this site ESPECIALLY (because people here are far more aware and honest as to what they are looking for than say, Match.com) is “about” whatever two consenting adults want it to be.

    If Stormy or I or any other SD want to look for a girlfriend or for “love” here, who is ILWCG (or anyone else) to say we shouldn’t? Who is she to send us to Match.com?

    Most SD’s didn’t get to their level of success by being stupid, and ILWCG wants us to be stupid by going to Match.com versus here just because we are seeking something that in her view isn’t the “standard” sugar relationship (whatever THAT is). That ain’t gonna happen.

    Match.com, being the traditional dating site, attracts women who are largely ageist–ie, if the guy is more than a few years older than they are, they are not interested. I don’t criticize them for this choice–everyone is entitled to look for what they think they want (LOL), I believe–but unfortunately, that approach doesn’t work for me. On this site, either because money is more important or because the women here are more enlightened, my age of 56 is not nearly the perceived liability that it is on more traditional dating sites.

    Many of the women here have figured out that if they screen well, having an older gentleman as a sugardaddy–or as a boyfriend, or even, perish the thought, a husband–is all to the good. In addition to the financial benefits of having made it by the time you are in your 50’s, many guys my age have tons of life experiences, are very comfortable in their skin, know how to treat a lady, and have the time and resources to travel the world and have a boatload of fun. My ex-wife is about 14 years younger than I and always stated how I could run circles around the vast majority of guys half my age. That hasn’t changed since I divorced her.

    But despite that, Match.com was a complete failure for me (not complaining about Match or the women on that site–just stating a fact). Given that, why shouldn’t I come here? I was looking for a GF on Match, and I look for the same here, except here, I have an opportunity to actually MEET women and allow them to evaluate me on my merits, rather than based on the date of my birth. Because I don’t expect a GF to materialize immediately, I am also looking for a more traditional SD/SB relationship in the meantime, but the goal for me is a GF. Please note that a GF for me doesn’t mean that the “sugar” stops. On the contrary, I will be at my most sugary with a GF–which makes sense because the stronger the connection, the more committed I feel toward the woman.

    And I have news (which surprised me, as well) for ILWCG regarding my assessment of women on this site, which opinion results from perusing hundreds of profiles and meeting perhaps 15 ladies so far. It is my estimate that 20% of the SB profiles either explicitly state, or strongly hint, that the woman is interested in a BF-type relationship, and I would say another 10% say they are open to it. Meeting women confirms that this 30% interest in a boyfriend is approximately accurate. Therefore, based on my assessment, at least, nearly 1/3rd of the women here are interested in some version of a BF/GF relationship, further impugning ILWCG’s conclusion that for Stormy or me to be looking for a GF here is somehow “cheating” this site.

    I’ll deal with the second aspect of ILWCG’s quote in my next verbose (LOL) post.


  152. Stormcat says:

    JamaicaMeHappy ~ Just a little comment about the bringing a friend on the meet and greet. Seems like a wonderful plan. I don’t think there is a single SD who wouldn’t thoroughly enjoy spending the time meeting two beautiful women. One caveat though, I had one time a woman meet me with her gf in tow and I fell for the gf rather than her. A bad situation that I never perused but the what if still haunts me a little.

    btw I love your screen name!.

  153. Tina says:

    @Content: I KNOW! Have a good night! I’m not too far behind you 🙂

  154. ContentSB says:

    @Tina — We should’ve exchanged emails a long time ago!

    I’m off to bed… g’nite lady! 🙂

  155. Tina says:

    @Content: WHOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOO!!!! You sexy thang! And I will def keep you posted. Blog gods, please send Content my e-mail address so that I can keep her updated without harassing the entire blog with my issues 🙂

    (And everyone can thank me later!) 😉

  156. ContentSB says:

    @Tina — There’s a full size bed in my room back at home…which I quickly found out was too small for two…sooooo we may have moved into my parents room. Could it be any more cliche?! Oh well…it was a fun time 🙂

    Keep me posted on how your situation develops!

  157. Tina says:

    @Content: it keeps it interesting 😉 LOVE the new pic btw. And the Vegas story with your parents is just TOO classic! You bad girl – dry humping your married SD in their house! Shame! (actually, no shame, I’m not-so-secretly jealous) 😉

  158. ContentSB says:

    @Tina — hahaha!! Gotta love a little DHing every now and then 😉

  159. Tina says:

    @Content: SWEET! Now I can stop dry humping his leg and get on with it…..hehehehehehe Yeah, I went there! 🙂 (he’s actually quite tall – he’s 6’4″ and I’m right around 5’6″…….)

  160. ContentSB says:

    @Tina — Let’s create a time machine. Boom. Problem solved.

  161. Tina says:

    @Content: The only problem I have is that he’s starting to figure out more ways to make me smile, and it’s weird because we just “get” each other. *Sigh* We just met each other at the wrong time in each others lives. Well, more like the wrong time in his life 🙂

  162. ContentSB says:

    @Tina — Isn’t it funny how someone can be a good influence despite a complicated surrounding situation? Ultimately nobody has to understand the intricacies of it except the two of you. If it works in its own way, then it works. I say keep him around as long as he’s making you smile…the second he’s not doing that anymore, time to cut the ties.

  163. Tina says:

    @Content: he’s pretty damn amazing, and I’m really enjoying where things are. And it was my thought exactly on the situation regarding the chats ending when they did; even before they got to the point that they are at now, we only chat when he’s not home during work days. It’s rare that we chat on our off days.

    And I still have to figure out why he was brought into my life in this current fashion, but I’ll see it when it’s time. Right now he’s a good influence on me, since he is good about making me smile when I need it. Even if he gets a song stuck in my head when he does it sometimes. He had “my girl” stuck in my head the other day, and then “Smooth Operator” a few days later. I owe him for that 🙂

  164. ContentSB says:

    @Tina — Gushing is totally necessary sometimes!! If he knows the chats have to end when he gets home, then he’s obviously already crossing some sort of line in his mind. I think if he thought of it as texting someone who was truly just a friend, then there wouldn’t be any reason to hide that at home. I think “the talk” will do you both a lot of good, but in the meantime just enjoy it 🙂 People come and go from our lives for all sorts of reasons…enjoy learning why he’s been brought into yours!

  165. Tina says:

    @California SB: I think that there are comments on the previous blog about the party (I believe that flyer was the latest to comment on it).

    And I agree with you re: $100 left on the dresser. It’s one thing to have an agreement in place or discussed prior to the encounter and have the allowance delivered in a respectful fashion. It’s another to leave money on the dresser. Taaaaacky!

  166. Tina says:

    I meant c’est

  167. Tina says:

    @Content: I’m hoping that “the talk” will help sort things out too. I think this whole situation took us both by surprise; we started out as coworkers, quickly becoming friends. When I found out about his child having special needs, and I work with a non-profit that works with children with those same special needs, we traded phone numbers. Soon he was texting me every morning before work, and we text on our way home (he has an hour and a half commute, while I only have about 35 minutes). The conversations just evolved very quickly (about 3 weeks). He’s gotten so that he actually hates getting home in the afternoons since the chat ends there. Right now I’m just trying to enjoy the attention an the friendship and not focus on what is looming. Like I said, I know that whatever happens will be amazing (we’re pretty damn good together) but there are some nasty complications that would need to be figured out too.

    GAH! Phew, I’m not usually this gushing on the blog…….buuuut……c;est la vie!

  168. California SB says:

    I getting lots of emails lately from from guys who are looking for a “girlfriend” instead of a sugar. Since when this site became match dot com? I believe it says seeking arrangement not seeking girlfriend. I think some guys don’t get the fact that we don’t need this site to find someone to be a boyfriend. If you accept 100 bucks, you’re a sugar but if you ask 1000 you’re a whore? Huh?

    BTW if someone ever left me 100 bucks on top of a dresser I swear I would tear it up and throw on his face….

  169. ContentSB says:

    @Tina — It sounds like a tough situation!! Maybe when you have “the talk” you’ll be able to better gauge where he’s at/what he wants for his future. That might help you decide how to proceed.

  170. I LoveWestCoastGirl says:


    You need Guru and wedwestSB advices how to deal with financial part before you go to hotel room with a guy.

    All these guys abused you and this site; they are disgusting !!!

    But most importantly they DEVALUED their OWN sexual experience!

    There are a few basic instincts and Sex is one of them !
    Of they value their sexuality so low , if it is not important for them YOU feel great about him, he does thinks you Nothing… why have sexual interaction with you ?
    They value their penis SO low?
    They enjoy stolen candies?

    I can steal a candy in candy store by I would not be able to enjoy it! But obviously guys feel/think differently .

    I had my $100 guy (doctor); I wrote before about that accident – first time he put ($400) ; sex was very good;

    Second time sex was Great (he put in my purse $100)

    I was So offended ! but he cheated himself ;

    He wanted to see me again , e mail me, texted me … and I even could not answer his mails , it was outrages;

    After 6-7 weeks (I do not remember) I wrote him that it is very offensive $100 – would be better if he just did not give me anything. he wanted to see me, brought money, I took it and without saying “thank you” left.

    yes, many of these “amazing ” guys at site with big incomes, Ivy school grads are going to try to steal it for free.
    and they will be still ! Sincerely ! think /feel great about themselves – like they are honest, kind gentlemen , and find next Stacy, NYG,…
    they are successful business men , they would not trick, steal from business partners , co workers… why they
    still think they are decent humans if they do it to kind, naive, younger girls?

    This is what is bizarre to me.

  171. Tina says:

    @Content: thanks sweetie! The hard part is that we both know where things are going, but haven’t had “that” talk yet. I don’t think either of us wants to face it right now. (And I know we’ll have to get to it soon, we are just enjoying the, uh, budding friendship right now) It gets harder because not only is he married, but has a special needs child in the mix. AGGGGH! He’s not happy in his marriage, he doesn’t have to tell you it’s something that ANYONE can figure out. They divorced once, and remarried, but I know that things aren’t going that well by a few comments he’s made. Unfortunately it’s a situation for some pretty ugly heartbreak at the end, even with keeping my head in check. This is why I don’t want to get involved with a married man, because my heart doesn’t listen to my head at all.

    Now I need some chocolate 🙁

  172. California SB says:

    Soooooooooooooooooooo no one is talkiing about the disaster of the party?? Cops showed up and everything….

  173. ContentSB says:

    Oh, funny story! My parents just went to Vegas for a week (conservative North Dakotans) so tonight my mom was telling me about all of the disturbing things she saw…at the top of her list was a “man who was late 50s holding hands with this girl who looked about your age, blonde hair, red lips, short skirt, high heels…and you JUST KNOW he’s married. How disgusting?!”

    Oh mom….if you only knew…if you only knew. And to make it even more ironic…I went home to watch their dog for a few days while they were gone…and my married bf came with 😉

  174. I LoveWestCoastGirl says:

    It is bizarre that I’ve found more interesting people on SA in one month than in years of intermittent internet dating!

    It is not bizarre – it is the main thing on sugar site. !

    It is a paradise for guys who have been through regular dating web site.

    On sugar sites an older not so hot looking guy can easily meet in a few weeks 10-20 years younger, beautiful, smart girls who would look at him with adoration , tell him a lot of compliments, spend a lot of her energy, time… with him.

    Guys get used to this very fast, get addicted to “the shopping ” process .

    and this is not so good for SBs coz for 1 year I see same guys over and over at SA, shopping, and shopping … Changing SBs every a few months, trying to try all the candies in the candy store , flavor of the month thing.

    So if a guys is not going to be generous with the girls from sugar site and looking for GF experience, or Love
    , future wife … To me it is cheating the system thing,
    Pls go to the regular dating sites, date girls your age, spend 6 months trying to get even 1 date …

    nothing personal , it is Not about blog SDs (for example even though Stormy looking for his “drug of choice” Love of his life; he is always generous and a gentleman ).

    But I met a few guys who would be “all girls at SA are prostitutes, they just asking for money… I am looking for a GF …and I am naturally generous with my GF…” “you are not like them, right,you are not a prostitute , but you understand the nature of this site – is intimate relationship…”

    Which means he would expect you to sleep with him on second date , and be with him for 2-3 months… then he would consider you are his GF and he would start to be “naturally generous” (in his understanding ).

    Which is cheating the system :)) and abuse of this site and SBs.

  175. California SB says:

    Did I just read about some SD leaving 100 bucks on top of dresser? Wow…

  176. ContentSB says:

    @Tina — Sometimes you can’t help who you fall for. This past year has taught me that not everything is so purely black and white. A lot of happiness can be found in grey areas too as long as people respect each other and keep expectations in check. You’ve got a great head on your shoulders and I’m sure you’ll do what’s right for you!!

  177. Tina says:

    @Content: nope, not at this time. It’s a situation that I’m VERY conflicted with, but can’t seem to walk away from. He’s becoming a very good friend, we work together, and the more we get to know each other the better we just seem to “fit”. Dammit. Let’s just put it this way – if he wasn’t married things would be MUCH more fun right now! Neither of us have crossed that line, but it’s coming. And I feel guilty as hell. This situation is actually making me more and more close off to a married SD 🙁

    @Ellen: Thank you darlin’! And no, I’m not married. This situation is relatively new, and I have an issue with dating (sugar or non) married men. I have to be careful with this one, though, because I find myself trying to justify crossing the moral line I really don’t want to. And I love being thought about! Yeah for chocolate! 🙂

    And FYI ladies – the gel polish colors are AMAZING! They’re $10 here for what seems like a small bottle, but it goes a LOOOONG way and stands up to a LOT! You can get the gel polish during a manicure too, even though you have to ask for it and it costs a little more. But if it can stand up to my abuse, it’s SO totally worth it! (Plus it dries super hard, so if you have an issue with nail feathering after a certain length like I do, it keep them from breaking…..)

    Ok, special public service announcement done 🙂

  178. SouthernCharmSB says:

    @ Tina – Wow! We certainly have a lot to catch up on, girlie! I think it’s great that you are looking for a SD!! Yay! And sending good vibes your way for the job search! I have loads to tell you too! Is it okay if the Blog Gods exchange our e-mails? (Not sure why I hadn’t asked before, but better late than never!)

    School is great but challenging and it keeps me mega busy! Hoping to find my new SD soon so that I can unwind from all the mental stress. So far things are looking promising and my meet with SD pot #1 today was a lot of fun. We’ll see how things go with SD pot #2 tomorrow! 🙂

  179. EllenSugarB says:

    Tina….You have a non-sugar married man in your life? You alluded to it in the last blog, but I haven’t read/posted long enough to know the situation. (Not your husband I’m assuming) Oh my, I thought my situation was confusing. I can only imagine that yours would be more complicated. I have to say, now that I made the clean break from it i feel a LOT better. I hope you get some clarity. And I thought of you today when I bought a chocolate bar at the grocery store. Thinking about blog folks at the grocery store…hmmm…maybe not so normal 🙂

  180. ContentSB says:

    @Tina — You’ve mentioned the situation in your personal life a few times now…just out of curiosity, is it opening you up to the possibility of a married SD??

  181. EllenSugarB says:

    Jamaica – Ask him “How do you feel about meeting my girlfriend and I for coffee/lunch/a drink? It may sound silly to you, but I’m a little new to this and I would feel more comfortable having a friend there when we meet — just for the first time.” And no, it isn’t immature of you to do this. It is how you feel and what you are comfortable with. Plain and simple.

    I agree with what Tina and Midwest say in regards to trusting your instinct and putting safety first. Your instinct is to bring a friend, so do it. And I agree with Russian that if he flakes on you, at least you will have someone to hang out with.

    I haven’t ever brought a friend, but I can’t imagine any guy that I have met from here having a problem with it if I had asked this of them.

  182. Tina says:

    @SouthernCharmSB: I’m good honey! I have something interesting brewing in my non-sugar personal life that has me conflicted – it’s good, yet bad. (Let’s just say it’s good feelings about a married man, and we all know I have difficulties with that) I’m on the search for a better job! And because of the help some of the wonderful SDs on here gave me on my resume and cover letter, it renewed my faith and confidence so I started getting a little more aggressive about finding a SD. 🙂

    How’s school?

    And isn’t hockey just great????

  183. SouthernCharmSB says:

    Evening, sugars! Tina, darling, how in the world are you?! Hockey? Count me in!! 🙂

  184. RussianSB says:

    It is absolutely normal if you bring you friend, real SD even offer to you to bring your friend
    to feel comfortable, also it is good idea if you date will late or not show at all – you spend time with your friend. But, boys don’t mind, really. You also can invent code language
    (master class :). If you like that guy… for example call him ”dessert”… that fancy talks will be like that : You know, Sindy, I really like to have a dessert, it looks so nice, that I want to bite it….. or I am not into sweets today, I remember that I am diabetic
    I hope, guys, it is not offencive to you ?

  185. Tina says:

    @Jamaica – Taking a friend to the meet isn’t exactly something that would be advisable. Take a look at the SB Safety Tips. Personally, I feel that if you’re not comfortable with meeting the pot that either 1) you need to talk to him more to get comfortable 2) he’s not the right SD for you or 3) if the issue is that your aren’t comfortable with a first meet, you need to reevaluate if this is for you. You SHOULD feel the first date jitters, but shouldn’t fear for your safety.

  186. gtt_envy says:

    Stacy, that is laughable!! I probably take alot of the mystery away, but allowance is one of the first things I discuss. Also I send pics immediately because either of those are off whats the point. I would be firm making sure the pot sd knows after a meet n greet that the allowance starts.

    So selfish some these guys!!

  187. JamaicaMeHappy says:

    I always read what you guys right but have never put in my two cents before!
    Is it immature to bring a girlfriend with to meet a potential SD or is that ok, im new to this and dont feel fully comfortable meeting him by myself. Any advice?

  188. Tina says:

    @VASD: and who said I was a typical ANYTHING? Hmmmmm?

  189. EllenSugarB says:

    Content: Re someone asking for cell phone immediately. Google Voice is free and not traceable to your personal information. Personally, I am inconsistent with checking e-mail and text messages so the phone is a more effective way to reach me. Also, if I cannot talk over the phone with someone (albeit briefly) I am almost certain that we won’t get along in person. A phone conversation is also a good way to weed out fake SDs with ten different profiles who find it entertaining to send endless go-nowhere e-mails. …What?! People do such things?!?! Yes, people with a lot of time on their hands do such things.

  190. Tina says:

    @VASD: I went to school at Purdue, which means I met a friend that was from Michigan, and got me hooked. We have a team or two here (Go Stars! Go Wings!)

    You say Go Devils and I may have to come up there and smack you. 🙂

  191. VASD says:

    @Tina Go Caps. Go Bruins.
    I’m a northen guy in many aspects–learned to skate on our farm pond. I don’t recall any of my Texas friends reminiscing about slapping a puck around on a stock tank. xoxo

  192. RussianSB says:

    I have additional cell for dating and give it, but not push to call me that very day, by the way if pot continue to write to me two weeks more, having my cell number – he is virtual guy (but I don’t mind to practice my bad English). In my special case, price of international calls cut off bad apples. I even not recieve
    p…s pictures :(((

  193. Tina says:

    <—- not a football fan, but bring on the hockey baby! YEAH!

    Cell phone immediately? Hmmmmmm…….I haven't had it happen, but I think it would make me uncomfortable too, since I wouldn't know that the person was genuine. Plus I value my privacy, and would like the other person to know that I also value theirs.

  194. VASD says:

    @RussianSB You are wise and fun to read. I’ll admit to enjoying the ‘looking for’ process. Am also careful to be clear that I am NSA only–but that does not bar friendship.
    And, yes, plenty of gorgeous airheads out there–I much prefer someone sharp, witty and fun–that they may be more plain looking than the ‘bombshell’ doesn’t matter.

  195. Circe says:

    @ContentSB: I am both a Packers fan and a Seahawk fan. There were far more bad calls than just that last one and more than a few potential game changing bad calls. It could have gone either way. Both teams deserved better.

    As far as why SD’s want a cell phone right away?…I’ve had a couple tell me that it’s because they hate the endless back/forth of email and prefer talking on the phone or texting. I just take this at face value because I do not yet have a reason not to. Legit? No?

  196. VASD says:

    @ContentSB I am not comfortable with being asked for a cell # right off the bat–and even like to have a bit of to-ing and fro-ing on SA-mail before reverting to regular email. Once I get a real rapport going and feel that the person I’m dealing with is on the up-and-up, then no problem with a phone conversation.

  197. ContentSB says:

    Also…what do you all think about SDs (or SBs) who ask for a cell phone number immediately? I find it odd and wonder what motivates them for immediate communication.

  198. OW says:

    I’m new here and so far it has been difficult to find an SB here in London.

    It’s been flakes all around.

  199. ContentSB says:

    Hi Sugars! Trying to catch up on the blog, but there’s so much!!

    @NCGent — Ahhh!! Another Packer fan here?! I loooove it! I’m sure we could chat endlessly about how crappy Monday night was…but everyone else is probably sick and tired of that drama 😉 My dad bought my brother and I stock last year for Christmas…it was the best gift ever! I like to think that means I own Aaron Rodgers 😉

  200. RussianSB says:

    @Stormcat, you will find love if you are looking for love.
    But some people here addicted to ”looking for” process,
    we said in Russia : ”BETTER is enemy of GOOD”.
    How many clever, goodlooking, smart girls do you meet from SA ?
    And not fall in love ? I am not believe that all girls want NSA . Or you looking for someone more clever, more attractive, more special ?
    Another fairytale from RussSB : one politician, goodlooking and blueyed meet only with girls tall and Dcup, but one day he meet redhead average looking very badtempered waitress, fall in love and marry her. I mean, you have no idea what is good for you :))))

  201. Lafite says:

    @Tina: Time well spent, I find 🙂

  202. Tina says:

    @Lafite: sometimes its fun to help someone smooth out the bumps 😉

  203. Lafite says:

    @RussianSB: girls frequently come to dates with me in flats because they’re worried about height – I’m only 5’5. I actually quite like the ‘girl-taller-in-heels’ bit, and usually mention it before the date to reassure them, but the majority still come wearing flats. It’s always a bit of a disappointment, but I understand why they do it. It’s something that would easily change.

    Messy hair can be very sexy – Kim Wilde got it right…

  204. RussianSB says:

    @ILoveWestCoastGirl Wet hair effect is very sexy 🙂
    But pot SBs do come for date with messy hair, flats, or even UGGs. Boys tell such storys. It is not bad, it is normal for 20 y.o. Anyway, shopping can correct looks.

  205. Stacy says:

    This life is confusing and scary! I’ve met for lunch/drinks with three pot SD, the first a Doctor after months of calls and emails, offered to get me a car and an apartment, we go upstairs to his hotel room and enjoy a lovely time, we email a few more times and he starts pushing for really sexually adventurous things I wasn’t interested in (watching me perform on his friend, etc.) so NOT a fit, and I got nothing from it. 2nd a lawyer, many meetings for drinks, he keeps asking to meet at a hotel but isn’t discussing what he’ll give to the arrangement. And 3rd, what I am furious and disgusted with. Met with a successful, attractive, sexy older man for lunch. I told him that I want an SD that I am attracted to, can have adventurous private times, and who will be generous and dominant. He agreed with all of this. A few days later we meet for a nice time in a hotel room – no sex, he wanted to watch me then … After he finishes, he puts $100 in the dresser and leaves!!! $100 is an offensive amount! I beautiful, petite, thin and curvy, and educated. $100 is what someone would give a roadside hooker!!

    He has emailed a few more times wanting to meet, and I enjoy him. How do I help him understand that $100 left in cash on the dresser like I’m a prostitute is offensive? Help! How do I get what I want (and what I am worth, considering all the wonderful erotic things I’ll bring for him.)

  206. Lafite says:

    @Tina: I quite like the SB’s with bumps in the right places…..

  207. Tina says:

    Oh, and HI sweet SouthernCharmSB! You’re gorgeous and absolutely wonderful, so those pots are already lining up I’m sure! Have fun picking out a new one 😉

  208. Tina says:

    @Lafite: I think that one of the most interesting things about this site that differentiates it is that people who are on here for ANY length of time have thought about what they are looking for. You find people who have dissected what they want out of a relationship, so they’re free to be who they really are. They aren’t caught up in “what does this person want? Are they good for me? Do I want this long term?” etc. etc. as much as people are on traditional dating sites. Because of the nature of this site, I think people are more open and somewhat relaxed about what the relationship is. Communication is one of the key factors of successful sugar dating, of course, but it is also true of ANY kind of dating. 🙂

    And not ALL SBs are concerned about smearing their make-up, breaking a nail, or getting their hair wet. Just remember that she may also come with a few of her own bumps (i.e. not a perfect manicure) for that trade-off. And please don’t expect her to love shopping. Ick.

  209. OW says:

    I am new to the Sugarworld and finding an SD here in London has proved difficult to say the least, the majority of men who have contacted me are looking for an escort and the one who didn’t left me waiting in the cold and rain!

    I am punctual, always have been.

  210. Lafite says:

    @Circe – with my cooking you might want to do the BBQ, but I’d spare you the car 🙂

    @RussianSB – your almost perfect English doesn’t need pardon, my non-existent Russian definitely would.

    @Nwsugarbaby – that sounds perfect! I enjoy scuba, snowboards, flying, salsa, white water rafting, kayaks, but more than one pot has been concerned about getting their hair wet!

    @ Stormcat – I know *exactly* what you mean, as I’m looking for the same. It doesn’t mean that I don’t understand that the probability is that if I think I’ve found it, it won’t last as long as I would want it to, but the possibility of that has to be there, or it just doesn’t work for me. My profile makes that quite clear – if you’re just here for money and gifts, you’d have to be a great actress for it to work.

    It is bizarre that I’ve found more interesting people on SA in one month than in years of intermittent internet dating!

  211. EllenSugarB says:

    So, I am looking at the picture above and thinking “They look like a young married couple.” Then I zoom in on her hand: wedding ring. Aha!

  212. I LoveWestCoastGirl says:

    hair style topic now :))
    at least not a cookie recipe exchange 🙂

    A few guys told me they like wet hair style ; not completely wet hair but I put styling foam while hair is still wet and then it is dry (or half dry ) it is still look like wet.

    of course depends on the date. If you are invited to Petrossian – perfect hair and your best designer outfit is a must . if I know we are going to his apartment / hotel room , get sweaty and take shower in 1 hour 🙂 … What is the point to spent 1 hour doing the hair (plus he’ve seen me with a hair do on the first date. 🙂 :))
    Yes, I am lazy. 🙂

  213. Circe says:

    oops…my @Stormy should have been @ Lafite!

  214. Nwsugarbaby says:

    Lafite- Not all sugar babies like just those things. I consider myself adaptable. I can dress up, but am still not worried about being unbarbie like on occasion. I think variety is the spice to life and I love going out in the woods (hiking, camping, etc).

    Stormcat-I hope you find what you are looking for. I think it is great that the site attracts men who are looking for a variety of things from NSA to more serious. It gives SBs options as well. That being said for love one must screen harder as many on here like myself are young and not looking for something more than a long term Sugar Daddy.

  215. Circe says:

    @ EllenSB

    “But high-maintenance, over-styled, barrel curls, untouchable because I used a bottle of hairspray type of hair would make me like Barbie.”

    I wouldn’t have a clue how to do that in the first place. When I perform I do some crazy stuff with my hair but that is typically simple in the hair design department and heavy on the stuffing-it-with-shiny-stuff department.

    @Stormy: I could always show you how to use a BBQ and fix your car. 😉

  216. Ms. New York says:

    New to SA website but not new to the “sugar world”. I have to agree do not go into arangement thinking about only money cause you probably won’t think straight. I think you should feel comfortable with your SD. If you don’t move on, If he wants to meet you the same day he emails you move on, if he wants sex on your first meeting move on. That’s not a SD/SB relationship. You might met one like that but be patience the real McCoy is out there.

  217. EllenSugarB says:

    Not sure that I would ever show up with messy hair, or wet hair…unless I got the “come over right now I don’t care how you look” green light.

    But high-maintenance, over-styled, barrel curls, untouchable because I used a bottle of hairspray type of hair would make me like Barbie. Fake. Not my style. And takes an hour! But I would do it if they wanted me to.

  218. EllenSugarB says:

    Nope…EllenSugarB it is then

  219. I LoveWestCoastGirl says:


    He is far away from California. 🙂


    I have clothes for different styles. I think guys/SDs like dresses (or may be I like guys who like girls in dresses). 🙂
    I am sure no SB shows up for the First date with a pot with messy hair.
    For second, third … date I can come with clean ! But not styled hair or wet after shower hair … I think it is ok (or may be I am just lazy to style it or do not have time).

  220. RussianSB says:

    Chateau @Lafite, don’t worry, Dear , you will have plenty of TomBoy SBs here.
    Pictures in profiles from special events , with flirty dresses and make up – nobody will come to the date with such looks. You will meet plenty of jeans, no makeup, messy hair and flats. And , sure, nobody put in profile – I prefer night clubs, B52 and flirt with cute waiters to dinners and wines in a company of powerful man – that meant to be surprise, not upfront information. Oh, I am evil now :))
    The bonus of being SD is popular game called ”let’s dress my new SB”, you can ask
    your SB to wear special for you (while she is with you) your favorite style. We all enjoy casual. More difficult task to ask girl to wear high heels and fashionable dresses for you,
    if she hates heels. Buy the way, we love you guys in any style dressed !!! But dressed you are only when you have wifes. You know the rules when you buy watches and socks,
    but I can guess marital status from you clothes, I don’t need to look at golden ring.
    Pardon me, my horrible English, Dear chap.

  221. EllenSugarB says:

    Stormcat – I’m not sure of your locale, but there are a lot of ‘quirky’ girls in San Francisco, and Berkeley.

  222. I LoveWestCoastGirl says:

    You call yourself “bohemian romantic ” in your profile, right. so u r not surprise with this girl answer.

    Ok, we can use some romantic vibe on the blog. 🙂

    LOVE is the most powerful , rare, fancy narcotic .
    it is extremely hard to find and to have and to keep.

    And you are asking for it so casualy like for the simple sex/cash exchange (which is very easy to find).

  223. EllenSugarB says:

    “What do you think that every SB should know when first starting out/What worked for you?” Kind of the same answer to both questions…

    In addition to some of the good points made above:

    Be a good listener. Keep your Ego in check. Your SD’s Ego, while already substantial, can always use a little stroking. A few minutes of actively listening on your part will serve you better than using that time to talk about how great you are. Why? Because this is namely about HIM. You will know better how to keep him happy if you listen and get to know something about his core personality.

    Have some humility. It’s great to talk yourself up in your profile and let yourself shine. It’s another thing to make up for in pride that which you lack in reality. It’s better to be understated and be a pleasant surprise, than to be overstated and be a huge disappointment.

    Treat your SD even BETTER than you would treat a business partner. He deserves all of the same respects that you would pay to an associate, with an extra special sugary sweet personal element sprinkled on top.

    Establish and maintaining trust is the key. Having integrity should be in the forefront of your mind at all times. Be honest and forthright. Stay true to your word.

  224. Stormcat says:

    Ilovewestcoastgirl ~ ha ha ha! I know that what you and guru are saying in general is right. the thing is that every woman on this site is physically remarkable and so all I have to do is find that one who compliments me otherwise emotionally, creatively, and intellectually such that therefore. I don’t really have to worry about whether I will be attracted to her physically. On all the other sites the physically attractive women are overwhelmed and consequently responding only to textbook perfection. I am quirky and not the ordinary textbook gem. So someone has to be quirky too in order to respond to my character and poetry and predilection to dance and understanding of the attraction of sports. But she has to also be an Indy chick yet not mind classical music or experimental theatre or really witnessing the beauty of watching a sunrise while kayaking on a spring river.

    Sometimes I wonder . . . Why doesn’t every woman on the planet want to experience what I am offering. Then a really attractive pot wrote to me that I was not a match because she was not attracted to the Bohemian lifestyle. OMG I’m not bohemian and I only go there because of the existentialist beauty of accepting whatever comes to you! I really embrace luxury if I can achieve it!

  225. Lafite says:

    Hi all

    On the comment “You Can’t Force a Ball Into a Square”, and from a London view, I’m finding it difficult to find a SB who wants to do anything more than dinners, theatre, etc – aren’t there any TomBoy SB’s about?

    Maybe I’m just too square an SD for the SB balls to fit into!

  226. I LoveWestCoastGirl says:


    Why would anyone call you a hypocric (base on what you just wrote).

    I would call you a real SD. 🙂 seriously.

    Married, successful , generous , looking for a younger, fun companionship . just my fav. type of guy (SD).

    Storm cat. yes, Guru pointed many times that – you are looking for the real true Love ! at the very right place (sugar web sites), among the girls who are always looking for eternal Love right here.

  227. VASD says:

    @Circe I totally get your ‘different cultures have different senses of time’. I work for an organization headquartered in a developing country–things can disappear into the bureaucracy there for days/weeks. Doesn’t mean there not great and perfectly competent people, though.

  228. VASD says:

    @Stormcat If you’re including me in that, there was no offense taken.

    Call me a hypocrite for being here, but I have true love in my marriage. I enjoy the friendship and excitement from the folks I’ve met through SA, but approach those relationships as NSA.

  229. Stormcat says:

    Thank you all for your comments responding to my post about dating people met here on the blog. I had no intention in my comment to offend anyone. Yes it is my experience. It is also many other’s experience too. In the past three years, I have dated five women from the blog and three from SA but not from the blog. Of those the three from the general SA population are still my close friends and regularly talk to me. Only one from the blog expresses regrets that we didn’t continue what we started, The rest were disasters for one or both of us. The thing is that none of the women from the blog would have matched the search parameters that I use when I search the general population so I should have known. My bad!!! L All I was saying in my post was just that the interactions on the blog can be so compelling and charming that the two can be enticed into entering into a relationship that they probably wouldn’t have chosen otherwise. No judgment of anyone was intended

    For me, I am looking for something real. I mean I want real love that is true and the kind that will last forever. So how can you tell when you meet someone if it is that. I have thought a lot about this and don’t believe there is any place that’s better than any other for finding what I’m looking for. I’ve realized that the answer is three steps. Real: Love is real simply when you both feel it. True: Love is true at the moment that you each decide to be true to the other. The kind that lasts forever: Love is forever when are both able to pledge your souls to each other and put all your time, energy, spirit, effort and commitment into making sure it lasts forever. Real love is the only thing that happens at first sight, but true love and love that lasts forever is something that must be sought after and earned

  230. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    typo error …. should be “let”

    will never be a typist!!! 🙂

  231. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Hi All

    Great blog and so many different experiences.

    I agree about having manners and not being late. If you are going to be, left the other person know.

    Hope your meets go well Southerncharm

    LV x

  232. Circe says:

    I have to agree with VASD on this one. But I will also add that there are cultural components to this as well. I spend some time attending my universities Arab Student Alliance functions. There is early, on time and Arab time and they are the first ones to admit it! I could go on and on as to why “Arab” could mean a lot of different things, but you get the picture. I would recommend that a potential SD be aware of these possible cultural differences and be able to clearly and politely communicate the need for punctuality as he defines it.

    I have driven in Seattle, observed Chicago and avoided New York traffic; yes, things happen that we cannot control. But repeated lateness is rude. If you know it takes you an hour and a half to get ready and you have a date at 6p, then start getting ready an hour and a half before you need to leave, not at 5:30p. Just my two copper-alloy anyway.

  233. VASD says:

    @RussianSB I don’t expect a lady to be able to prepare herself in an instant, but do expect her to account for her time and be ready to go at an agreed-upon time–she can take however long she likes as long as she doesn’t disrespect me and my time by missing an appointment. If a lady is unable to do that and causes me (us) to miss a dinner reservation, play, concert (and this has happened), then I’m not going to be very happy about it. I live in the Washington, DC area–one of the worst traffic regions in the U.S. and certainly understand that there can be exceptions–and I’m not going to get worried about a few minutes here and there–but someone who is excessively/chronically late is rude as well.

  234. RussianSB says:

    @VASD – but that is normal, they are ladies . My friends (girls) always late, for our meetings or partys, doesn’t matter if they are students or well known bussinesswomen.. Remember, when you have relationship, what time your woman spend to get dressed for dinner : 5,15,30 minutes ? 1,2 hours ?
    You are really thinking that Sugar change something in woman nature ? Don’t treat ladies like you treat bussiness partners. I can be ready (perfect make up and dress up) in 10 minutes, but only becose I have SD shouting in histerical manner ”I don’t like to wait, make it 5 minutes ! ” People late becose most of them not able to manage their time
    (boys also late, but I never make drama from that), while not to show at all – really rude.

  235. VASD says:

    Punctual is big for me. I always offer a small donation just for an initial meeting–to cover travel/parking/incidentals and to show that I’m for real. Having been left hanging several times for 1/2 hr to an hr by pot SBs, I now say ‘small donation just for showing up ON TIME’–this seems to get their attention because it hasn’t happened since.
    Had one you lady with audacity to call me right at the time of our date saying she was running ‘just a little’ late as she was getting her car out of the shop–would be there in 20 minutes or so. That rolled by and after several calls and texts it came out that her car was just going up on the lift for new brakes. Uhhh—yeah…right…don’t bother calling back.

  236. gtt_envy says:

    I just think the caption picture is funny!! He looks like a Stud at what 35-39yr old and she looks very close to his age too…..imo.

    Not saying the SD always has to be 10yr+ older that his SB, but for me when SB’s reach my age it won’t work. I can get dates all day long with women my age and it doesn’t cost $1000’s of dollars per month. I know for some the perks of NSA can make it worth it, but not for me. I can find NSA just going on dates here locally without spend $1000’s a month.

    To the topic at hand take your time!! Patience is a virtue and that goes for both the SD and SB. I’m have tunnel vision when it comes to the SB’s I’ve had. A certain look, certain attitude, then the communication piece, trust, honesty all have to be in check too.

    It’s hard to find someone who is a good match!! Unless you are just trying to make quick $$$ or just trying to get a quick “feel” so to speak.

  237. SouthernCharmSB says:

    Well, hello there, sugar friends! ::waving and sending air kisses::

    It has certainly been a long time since I stopped by the blog….and I’m loving the blog topic. I won’t even attempt to catch up on past blog posts, but I hope everyone is doing great! SouthernCharmSB has been busy balancing the life of a sugar baby, grad student and working gal. It has been one adventurous ride, that’s for sure! My long-term SD was still in the picture till last week when we mutually made the decision to part ways. This past weekend was our “farewell” trip and we celebrated our wonderful arrangement and wished each other the best. Hence, SouthernCharmSB is now a free agent! I have two meet-and-greets with pots this week so it’s time to brush up on all the sugar baby “basics”. Wish me luck! Have a great week everyone! xo

    Oh! In response to the blog topic:
    What do you think every SB should know about starting out?
    It takes time to find the right SD. Just like with any other relationship, the best arrangements are those where you wait until you find the SD that is right for you. Settling for an SD that does not meet your needs will eventually end miserably for both parties. Patience is a virtue…

    What worked for you?
    First and foremost, staying true to myself and to my goals and aspirations. There’s something about the quote “what you see is what you get” that rings true to me when taking into account the dynamics of an SB/SD relationship. While there are SBs and SDs that may misrepresent themselves on SA (i.e. the bad apples), there are also some very good apples in the barrel. I pride myself in being a delicious apple and it has certainly paid off in ways I didn’t even think possible! 🙂

  238. Circe says:

    @Midwest: In my mind it doesn’t matter if it’s a sugar arrangement or dating in the “real world”, a woman should always be able to take care of herself. Relying upon an SD or a boyfriend/girlfriend/partner, etc for money and status is not a good idea. I have known a number of women over the years who will just stop their path of education or career so they can “settle down” with their boyfriend/husband. Yes, I can understand why, but we need to be able to protect and support ourselves.

    Anyway, that may have gone off a bit from your point, but it’s where my exhausted grad student brain went. I may be about to embark upon my first SD/SB-ish experience. It’s not the standard arrangement that’s for sure but after reading what RussianSB has experienced…if that’s normal I’m not sure I could handle that!

    Always punctual, but that’s to be expected. Things happen, but they shouldn’t be the norm.

    I’m curious to see what other SB’s have experienced as far as the early stages.

  239. I LoveWestCoastGirl says:

    So you are in Moscow .

  240. RussianSB says:

    Naomi lives here, swimming in sugar, beautyful and permanently happy.
    NO scandals. Just like a kitten.

  241. RussianSB says:

    Dear, I am 5 minutes from Red place, where beers and gypsies dancing with balalaikas :)))) Just was charmed with that blog, and with the idea to create internet
    resource for Sugar dates. I am old-fashioned, always find SD traditional ways.
    Pity, that Russians not join the site – I am convinced that Moscow nowadays is World Capital of SDs ! And it is normal lifestyle here, I am asking some friends(boys) of mine
    if they ready to help financially woman with her education expences, provide her kids,
    and if they comfortable with allowance – most of them answer (absolutely not surprised),
    yes, sure, it is normal, I did it before, I always did it before. But NSA not popular here.
    Russians and drama-free ?
    (you get lots of drama for free,hehe)

  242. RussianSB says:

    Bad storys people have becose they not experienced in Sugar dating, and how they will get any experience if they have only bad storys – magic circle. I am only one here on the blog to think about that philosiphic question, and I must choose other name – Insomnia sound good. And I agree with MidwestSB – money is a safety belt in internet dating.
    I am ready to pay upscale restorant bill, 5 star hotel bill, any air ticket. It is maybe never something really bad happens to me.

  243. I LoveWestCoastGirl says:


    Are you in California? I am russian too. 🙂

  244. RussianSB says:

    Hi, MidwestSB, your posts always full of wisdom, and the real lady you are indeed, always polite, keeping ballance in blog. Being punctual is royal behavoir. It matters everything in Sugar world, even more important than looks. Once I spoiled SD with my
    always-ready-to travel-in short notice army-trained style. So he ask me to come to airport without planning it before, in one hour, while it is 2 hours drive to airport, if not – I will lose his friendship forever ! He was serious about, not joking, I ignore that request, sure, he not broke with me after. But I feel it is my fault – why in any circumstances,
    with flue, head/ass/stomack ache, bited with wild dog – no matters what – I will show up
    in time ? It is not normal and it is not sexy. But if you are ambitios SB being punctual is a MUST. I was lucky to have very rich SD – now I work hard to avoid that :)))))
    My reasons are :

    – very rich SD usually gives you same allowance as not very rich, but spend in casino 50 times more per month, which is not my bussiness anyway, but makes me feel miserable.

    – they are so busy jetsetters (normally flying everyday) that have no time for any relationship, even Sugar NSA. Spending a lot of time on board like Naomi in modeling years. I am used to have always packed ALARMsuitcase for spontaneos travels for tropical paradise.

    – they change their plans , tickets and moods 7 times a day. Be ready.

    But I love that guys, well organised, quick and smart minds, workoholics. While we are prefer from 9 to 5 working week.

    Generally, I think Sugar life do no harm to any woman – diamonds triffles, traveling to the most romantic destinations, meeting rich&famous people not kill you. It is very adventures life.

  245. Midwest SB says:

    What do you think every SB should know about starting out? ALWAYS trust your instincts and do not be afraid to wait for what you are seeking!

    What worked for you? Listening to our friends and their experiences on the blog. It’s always helpful to listen to others’ mistakes and learn from them. It also helped that I did not come here “needing” money. That sense of urgency has made many ladies compromise their standards and it just isn’t worth it.

  246. Midwest SB says:


  247. Angela says:

    All personalities and perspectives are welcome in the blog, while personal attacks and name calling are not. It’s inevitable that there will be disagreements but let’s handle it as mature adults with class to keep the dialog constructive and respectful. Please refer to the “Blog Etiquette” for more details. For the newbies, please take a look at the “Sugar Daddy Dating Tips” section on the right for a list of commonly discussed topics and the “SD and SB Blog List” section to see the perspective of other sugars. Now comment away and let’s enjoy the blog!!