8 years ago
Messaging Etiquette – Do’s and Don’ts
  • Posted Oct 9, 2012


Sure, online dating enables you to interact at the click of a mouse. But that doesn’t necessarily mean dinner and drinks is a sure thing. He or she may like what your profile has to offer, but first impressions only last so long. Make an even bigger impression by following these messaging guidelines…

  • DO be honest and up front about your expectations.
  • DO use proper grammar. Messaging “Woow u r hawt!” is not attractive. Knowing the difference between “your” and “you’re” is.
  • DO write in letter format. It shows effort.
  • DO reply politely, even if you’re not interested.
  • DO introduce yourself before asking for their real name.
  • DO integrate their profile information into your message. It shows genuine interest.
  • DO ask engaging questions.
  • DO share personal information after you have built a rapport with your date.
  • DO limit the use of emoticons. You’re not in middle school anymore.
  • DO treat Sugar Daddies and Sugar Babies with respect, even if they don’t agree with your terms.
  • DON’T just wink without messaging.
  • DON’T explicitly ask for sex. They are Sugar Babies, not escorts.
  • DON’T send the same message to multiple people. They can tell.
  • DON’T start your message with a pick-up line.
  • DON’T message or reply with one or two words (i.e. Hi There, Hey Sexy, Wanna talk?).
  • DON’T immediately ask for “pics,” money, or their phone number. Once a mutual trust is established, these topics are fair game.
  • DON’T be pretentious or rude, even if you are the benefactor.
  • DON’T curse or swear.
  • DON’T use nicknames/pet names without knowing the person.
  • DON’T send multiple messages in succession. It comes off as desperate and sometimes creepy.

What are some other common do’s and don’ts when messaging other members?

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65 Responses to “Messaging Etiquette – Do’s and Don’ts”

  1. Faith says:

    Hi I sent messages to many people and now I can’t reply to messages it’s been flagged as spam I think coz I sent same messages to a couple of people.
    Is there a period of time to wait before I can reply to my messages or I’ll have to contact the site support to fix it 😑

  2. Flaya says:

    What does it mean when you get viewed by the sd you messaged, but none of them replied back? I actually past the proper messaging etiquette. I would ask stuff about them, but most times I would not get a reply at all. I only saw that an sd read my message, but not answered it.So I am starting to think that probably most sd’s in my area don’t like black girls at all.

    • Welcome to my world. Same thing happened to me today. There was a new SD in the area. He messaged me and asked me what type of allowance I’d want. I told him I’d like to discuss in person and then I told him I’d prefer a pay per visit type thing until an allowance is established because that’s what it’s supposed to be like. I’m not sure if it threw him off but I typed a lot and he just stopped responding. I get so paranoid because it’s already hard to get them to notice me. Think I may have fucked up though. He obviously knew what he was working with when he messaged me. I’m not a catfish. Ugh… This is hard

    • Judy Baby Xo says:

      Oh and I also messaged a couple sugar daddies in my area as well but saw the same thing.. view, read message, ignore.. That’s what they do when they see that you’re black. It’s sad that your race can prevent you from living life to the fullest. Honestly girl.. I hate being black.

      • SugaryJ says:

        This comment breaks my heart. I’m 39, white, and not only do I respond to colorful women, I also reach out to them first. I can’t stand racism or anything that influences people to dislike or get down on themselves. Keep your head up girl, you’re beautiful and you define your own worth in life. Unfortunately not everyone in life is as beautiful as you. Keep ya head up.

    • Anonymous says:

      I think the same thing. I’m like there’s no way I’m not attractive or at least intelligent or fun enough to not even get a response back and they are usually premium so I know its not a message barrier.

      • emm4 says:

        I don’t think its a black thing, it happens to me all the time. I really thought the sugar bowl was different, but men reference escorts on the site, and say they won’t pay an allowance because what they really want is to sleep with you once and never call you again. Or, they meet you, want to see you every waking moment, find you on social media and want to marry you right away. Are there any decent men out there? Middle aged, not married, and don’t lie or are clingy? It seems all my messages are either from men who want to sleep with me on date one. Are you having any luck?

  3. Randy92 says:

    Hi I have a question is there a message limit for sugar babies? If so would I have to upgrade in order to send and recieve?

  4. B says:

    A definite “DON’T’ is to mention sex in the email stage. Have had many SDs tell me within the first 3 messages that they “f*ck like a porn star. UGH! This is a red flag to me. It makes the SD sound like he’s just looking for quick sexual intercourse.

  5. Champagne&Sunshine says:

    As a SugarBaby many POTs are quick to ask for my phone number. When is it appropriate to give them that information?

  6. POT_SB says:


    Do you do a profile review? It may help people get a better idea of how to – for want of a better word – market themselves. I haven’t joint the site yet but thinking about what makes a good profile, how honest are people really going to be?

    A dating website that allows your friend to put up your profile made me think from an outside perspective, at the end of the day why would you date you?

    If I were the SD why would I make the effort with me, I guess asking retrospective questions of yourself is one way of understanding what maybe lacking in your profile.

  7. twiceshy says:

    @Alia There are hundreds of thousands of Sugar Baby profiles on the site. You should check the Last Login date as well, to see when the person last used the site. When I search, I always sort the list by who most recently logged into the site. That way I don’t end up sending messages to people that no longer use the site. I think this is a Premium feature though.

    I have sent winks to scores, and you may receive only one or two responses, so this works both ways ^_^

  8. Alia says:

    I havewn’t gotten any views or messages? Will I get more attention from potential SDs if I become a premium member?

  9. MaleSugarBaby says:

    Don’t forget to include yah….. I repeat don’t sound too clingy either it will drive the potential SD’s or SB’s away.

  10. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Evening everyone!

    How are you all?

    Sorry to hear about your experience Ava.

    There are some lovely people out there, dont give up.


  11. SassyInMass says:

    Stunning- Ive had pots disappear just as we’re setting up a date, exchanging contact info, or even after a 1st phone call. Ive given up wondering why they poof at a certain event. Hopefully its just been random for you and not abt your pics. If you want to share your profile #, we can take a peek n tell you what we think of said pics. I had a guy write me a 3 paragraph lecture abt how he ‘reverse searched’ my pic and found out I ‘stole’ it from some poor helpless girl on Model Mayhem! Um hello thats me and my MM acct, thank you lmao. Prolly an innocent mistake on his part but the email rant he sent me was quite telling. No date for him

    • Judy Baby Xo says:

      Yeah I call them the “ghosters”. Well meet once, he’ll pay me and tell me he’d like to see me again. Then I ask him if we can hang out and he stops replying. Poof! One
      gone. Also had another SD stop
      replying to me after we planned
      our date. I don’t get why men just
      can’t be honest. It’s so annoying. Just tell me if you don’t wanna do
      this instead of leaving mestranded and left to wonder until I finally
      figure it out. ?

  12. SassyInMass says:

    Ava- sorry we missed your post. Upon starting on the blog my comments were blocked/ moderated too and no one could see them until everyone else was 3 pages past. So sorry you had such an awful experience; please send his info to the powers that be by hitting Contact Us and hopefully he can be stopped before someone else has to go through it

  13. Jack says:


    If you want to make contact to my profile (989322) I will be happy to look at your pics and comment, if you wish. Really impossible to respond without seeing them, although I will say I have a pet peeve about individuals who call themselves “stunning” or “gorgeous” etc.

    I would much prefer to see pictures and decide for myself.


  14. stunning says:

    Good Morning everyone
    I am truly new too all of this,
    I have one very vital question, why is it whenever I send pictures I never get a response back? This has happened so much I am starting to wonder if they think my pictures arent real? or??????
    We start talking and everything is going good and then I send a picture and there is no response after that!!!!!

  15. Tina says:

    @JaTTSD: I’m right here darlin’, and could be more accessible as needed 😉

  16. JustATequilaSD says:

    I hope it lasts.

  17. JustAThoughtSD says:


    If they aren’t fake profiles, they may be busy, incompatible to you, an old profile, a duplicate, already sb’d, or just may have moved on for whatever reason.


    What a long and hard day today. I’m not even going to out and party, how horrible. Where’s that sexy, yellow, goggled girl-minion when I need her? 🙂

  18. Bob says:

    Honesty and courtesy is the only way to go here. I have had a lot messages from ladies who are outside my budget range or live 800 miles away. I always thank them and wish them well, but explain that we aren’t going to make it out the gate together.

    My new SB and I seem to have the same expectations, and we live relatively close…But not too close (I’m a married SD). So far, everything is heaven.

  19. T says:

    Hello, new to the site (1 month),

    I’ve received a few strange/odd unsolicited messages, brief, one line, that don’t appear to have read my profile, as they reference things not affiliated in any way.

    Additionally, I’ve not received responses to those messages I’ve sent out? I’ve checked and all but 2 haven’t even been read?

    I did an experiment this past week, and chose 30 interesting SD’s to contact and wrote personal notes to each of them (several paragraphs, and included photos)…only one of them has been read.

    Are these profiles fake? (most recent login dates are hidden). If so, what’s the point?

    Thank you.

  20. Tina says:

    @JaTTSD: oh no, I wanted you to sleep, and have some sweet sweet dreams 😉

  21. JustAThoughtSD says:

    No bite marks? You put the T and A in PARTY! You must not want me to sleep tonight.

  22. Tina says:

    Hi Beachy! Been pretty good! And having way too much fun playing with JustATequilaThoughtSD 😉

    Speaking of, hiya JaTTSD! 🙂 I don’t leave visible marks, by the way

  23. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars!

    Tina~ 😀 hey girl! I’ve been ok, how have you been?

  24. twiceshy says:

    I got scammed badly on the site as well, from a SUgar Daddy perspective not as a SB. But there are some decent folk out there. As with everything else you need to weed out the bad ones. I don’t think that I get particularly good responses, but that could be my approach and what I’m looking for, who knows.

    Moving onto the escorts game,
    Comparing Escorts to Sugar Babies is a moot point in my view. Both are exchanging part of themselves for some sort of assistance. The site in general seems to look down on Escorts as though they are beneath the status of a SB. I think this is more to do with legal concerns in the United States than anything else.

    There are Escorts that develop long standing relationships with their clients, and get to know them very well. Almost like a SB. In fact some get paid monthly rather than per visit.

    There are many arrangements between consenting adults, and I’m wondering why a few need to feel that their activities are in some way superior or better than others 🙂

  25. flyr says:

    @Looking Glass SB

    There’s a percentage of SB for whom the sex at their place would sound like a great idea. Kink of like drive through service.

    There is no need to seek the words to punish him. A simple

    “I really appreciate your frankness and specificity which helped me understand your character and saved me from wasting another millisecond. ”

    Conveys the message . You may also want to block him.

    It’s really important not to internalize this any more than the stranger at the bar who suggests sex before he knows your name. Be filled with gratitude that you did not pass over a more worthwhile pot only to discover this after a week or two of emails , calls and perhaps a meeting.

  26. JustAThoughtSD says:


    re: Zohan
    It’s quite a silly and fairly unbelievable type movie. but I love it. Happy Madison is still one of my top comedies. Next to Eurotrip, Hall Pass, White Chicks, and a few others. Slapstick and visual comedy simply rejuvenates me. It’s so animated, like me. Don’t get me wrong, I can do the high-brow stuff as well.

    re: smell
    May I suggest the pinky test in the future. Or just call me over…either way.

  27. JustAThoughtSD says:

    Massages are always welcomed. I have pretty strong hands, so maybe I can help you relieve some butt tension as well. As for the biting and scratching, do your best to leave no marks. Especially those that I can’t cover up with regular clothing. I’m pretty much up for anything (within reason.) Scratches on my back would probably go unnoticed, but if I did some networking at the pool or sauna, I’m not sure how bruised teethmarks across my nipples would go over. Of course, if you were there at the pool I’m sure I’d need no explanation. 😉

  28. LookingGlassSugarbaby says:

    I agree with all the of the points

    I recently had a potential SD say that he only wants to meet up with me for sex and that’s it. At MY place. I have a roommate. That is just off-putting anyway.
    Anyone else agree?

  29. sassyteacher says:

    @SD Guru You are ever so helpful. Another nose could have been useful instead of trying to contort myself into a pretzel. Um…where exactly do you live? And like JustAThoughtSD mentioned that if I can’t get close enough to smell anything, I am obviously sweet smelling!

    Thank you, also, for the comments re. the Dos and Don’ts. I especially appreciated the suggestion that we let our pots know that we are also talking to others. I hadn’t really thought of that. I kind of feel embarrassed telling them that I am in communication with other pot SDs. I don’t want them to think that I’m trying to put pressure on them so that I get a better deal. I gues it’s better for an SD to know that the pot SB is weighing her options rather than thinking it’s all progressing smoothly and then having her change her mind at the last minute which you can do but it is better to be upfront.

    @JustAThoughtSD Glad, I made you laugh! I’m going to rent the Zohan this weekend since I’ve never seen it. I know, I know. I’m not a huge Adam Sandler fan but I did go see Hotel Transylvania a few weeks ago and laughed uproariously as did many other adults in the audience.

    @ JustAThoughtSD and @Stacy I told the pot SD that I smelled like cherries and then flushed him!


  30. Lady Vuitton *1171431 says:

    Hi Everyone!

    Wave from the UK.

    Excellent we are on a new topic. Will start to read it and add my ten pence worth.

    Keep well all

  31. Tina says:

    @CaliSB: and how in the hell is that an actual pick-up line? Geez! Yes, please compare me to a fatty piece of “meat”….yuuuuuuuuck.

    Pick up lines can be fun, but only if they are original. The whole “is your Dad an astronaut, because he stole some stars to put in your eyes” line is used (been there more than once….uggh!), come up with something sincere and original! A well timed, appropriate compliment means so much more. Sincerity will get you far.

  32. Tina says:

    @JustATequilaSD: awww, poor baby hurt his booty? Need a little massage to help it out a bit? 😉 It is nice to see that you have a wild side as well as the thoughtful one. I’m up for some spanking and hair pulling, but only if you’re willing to take a little biting and nail scratching 😉

    @Beachy: HI GIRL! 🙂 How’s is going honey? 🙂

    @Ava: unfortunately there are creeps out there, regardless of where you meet them. And that’s why you have to have your own personal safety in mind when setting up the first few initial meetings. I don’t have trust issues, but I don’t trust a date until he’s earned it.

  33. Beach_Girl says:

    Hey Sugars,
    I haven’t been on for a long time… how is everyone? 🙂

    A don’t should be: being on an Arrangement site should be for arrangements not for dating… I have gotten 5 messages in the past month for a real girlfriend, not an arrangement… drives me nuts, If I wanted a boyfriend, I would be on eHarmony or Match..you know!

    • SD Guru says:

      “There is something about her that just fits me and I think that all she needs is a reason to move on.”

      There you go again… bless your heart for being the hopeless romantic that you are! Best of luck to you, but remember, if you keep on doing the same things then you shouldn’t expect a different result. 😎

      “After reading his email, I actually bent over to see if I could get my nose anywhere near my privates but it was a no go.”

      Looks like you could have used some help from another nose! :mrgreen:

      • SD Guru says:

        Re: The blog topic

        I wrote the following five years ago, let’s see if it’s still relevant today.


        After having corresponded with many potential SB’s, I thought I’d share some do’s and don’ts from a SD’s perspective. Most of them are just common sense, but as we all know sometimes it’s not so common after all. Please note these refer to the initial discussion stage.

        1. DO talk about your priorities and what’s important to you, and discuss your goals and ambitions. DON’T ask “what’s your budget?” I’m looking for someone compatible to build a relationship with, I’m not buying a “product.”

        2. DO have a well thought out answer to “what are you looking for?” DON’T say “I saw it on Dr Phil and thought it would be cool to try.” Experienced SD’s are looking for SB’s that have a good idea of what they want. Those who have no idea usually end up being a waste of time, or worse, being taken advantage of.

        3. DO let the potential SD know politely that you’re talking to others, if that’s the case. It’s no big deal if you are, and if the SB is top notch then it’s to be expected anyway (and the reverse is true). DON’T tell the SD “I have ten SD’s lined up and they are offering xx a month.” This is a discussion, not an auction.

        4. DO ask the SD what kind of experience he had before and what type of arrangement he was comfortable with. DON’T ask “what are you offering?” Each person’s situation is different and there is no “one size fits all” offer the SD can make. Be open and communicate clearly and what he can offer should become apparent.

        5. DO ask the potential SD whatever questions you want to get to know him better. DON’T send out a questionnaire and ask him to fill out. This is a dialog, not a test!

        Obviously a top notch SD can be very selective, and the same for a top notch SB. But in general there are far more available SB’s compared to SD’s, which means the odds are usually in a SD’s favor. In order to stand out you should know what you want, why you want it, and be able to articulate it clearly. Carry yourself with confidence and present yourself in the best possible light. That would be a great start to any SD/SB discussion!

  34. Flyer says:


    I think that if the question is asked very early it should be enough information for most SB to make a decision

    Of course it may seem like a very normal question to some.

    Think of tasteless replies as a gift in that they can save huge blocks of time.

  35. Stacy says:

    This may sound crude, but I think any SB worth her allowance would know exactly how every part of her smells, and would be able to answer with confidence, “of course I smell delicious!”

  36. JustAThoughtSD says:


    My alter-ego is the Zohan. Deesco-deesco yah-yah-yah. I’m pretty happy most of the time. I’m boisterous, flirty, and fun. On the blog, I’m usually more thoughtful and reflective, but recently back on the market, so I’m in “party mode.” To kick it into turbo, just add tequila and hold on. The downside is that I have NO idea of what I really want anymore, so this Big Cat roams the plains, stalking his prey, the elusive Don Julio, and the ever present Jose Cuervo. I’m thinking of changing my nick to JustTequilaSD.

    re:that smell
    Glad you caught the song reference. When you said you tried to check your smell, I nearly fell out of my chair laughing at you. If you can’t get close enough to smell it, then you’re probably doing something right.

  37. Stacy says:

    Don’t message me for a one night hook up about how hot the sex will be! That isn’t an “arrangement” it’s a one night stand! Now if you say something like, “I’m in town for the weekend can I take you out, spoil you a little and see where things go.” That’s cool – but this isn’t the easy, cheap sex site! (If you want me to be easy I won’t be cheap, lol.)

    In general, don’t message if you don’t understand that mutually beneficial isn’t referring to female orgasms, lol!

  38. sassyteacher says:

    @JustAThoughtSD You are very funny and clever! Are you like this in person, as well, or does your alter-ego blossom on the page (screen)? Keep the puns coming!

    Re.: ‘Ooh that smell’ (good song, by the way) – I imagine he was talking about my odour in general, but then again, maybe not. After reading his email, I actually bent over to see if I could get my nose anywhere near my privates but it was a no go. My spine just doesn’t bend that way (imagine the visual!)

    Re.: poofing people. I had a character who disappeared as well. We exchanged messages, then a few emails then nothing and if he logged on while I was on Yahoo IM, he quickly logged out. So, I changed my profile on Yahoo messenger to invisible and, lo and behold, he stayed logged-in. I then changed my profile back to available and he quickly logged back out. It was rather pavlovian! He could just have said that he was no longer interested for whatever reason. I don’t know if it’s lack of manners or lack of self-confidence or the complete self-absoprtion of the individual but you can’t let it bother you. It’s really not personal.


    Do let the person know if you are no longer interested.
    Don’t let people dangle by a thread – it’s not polite.


    Do respond to the pot SB’s/SD’s questions or comments before you ask your own and vice versa. I’ve had a few characters who pretty much ignored what I had written in my message/email – they might have answered one question and then launched a barrage of questions back at me. It makes me feel superfluous, as though they want to speak to my photograph but not really to me.

    Doo use spelle chek!


  39. JustAThoughtSD says:

    Re: messaging etiquette

    I agree with NCgent. The talk and then poof is simply horrible. I talked to a girl in real life. We exchanged emails. We correspond by email/text/phone pretty well for a couple days and then poof. A week later I send her the “let’s be friends” email because I know we’ll run into each other again, and I don’t want her to act all weird when I see her. So when I do see her, everything is cool, and she’s just been busy. So we email/text/phone the next day…then poof.

    I don’t know how you young people do it, but if you say you’re interested in someone, and you can’t put forth the effort to talk to them more than once a week, it’s just not going to work.

  40. Ava says:

    I think I am done with seeking arrangements. The only people on here are scammer and dirt bags. I had a terrible experience last night with a man who was abusive, rude and became physically violent with me when I tried to leave ( he roughlygrabbed me twice and shook my arm). When I tried to warn others on this blog, my post was ignored and skipped over. It’s seriously pathetic that Brandon Wade would continue to collect $50 dollars a month from someone who is violent rather than delete his profile and ban him for being a danger. If the moderator would like to contact me directly my email address is ….

    [Moderator’s note]

    I’m sorry to hear about your experience, but complaining about it in the blog may not be as useful as contacting SA directly through “Contact Us” at the bottom of the home page. Please note that blog comments with an email address or url are automatically moderated to reduce spam. And please refrain from posting someone’s personal info such as a full name.

  41. JustAThoughtSD says:

    @all the new sb’s

    While on the subject of etiquette, if you feel my posts are a little wild or risque’, please skip over them for now. I dread the thought of upsetting your delicates by putting your panties in an uproar. This is what you can expect from me until my “party mode” ends. At which time, I will signal the “all clear”, so you may resume reading my thoughtful insights. In the meantime, I welcome you to the sugarbowl, and hope you find what you are looking for.
    ***End Public Service Announcement***

  42. JustAThoughtSD says:


    I’m more of a niteowl, but I have been known to be an early riser 🙂 Be an early comer and don’t hold it in we’ll get along great…I’ve got an apple for you, teacher, it’s hard as a math test, but you’ll have to go to the head of the class if we’re both going to get it. **And the sexual innuendos will continue.**

    re: Ooh that smell.
    Was this guy asking how you smell in general or was he asking about your privates? It wouldn’t surprise me either way. I won’t even tell the story a friend told me, just because it’s not nice.

  43. JustAThoughtSD says:

    @Goldfish @TravelerSB @CalifSB

    Escorts are people too and if that’s how they wanna get down on the site, that’s their bag. We have genuine love seekers all the way to strictly money seekers and everything in between. If an escort changes her game plan, applies proper SA etiquette, and does the deed and poofs after getting paid, it still won’t change the fact that she was an escort. Find what’s right for you, and kiss the frogs accordingly. And if you think it’s going to ruin the image of sugar babies, guess what, there will always be someone that won’t like it, no matter how pristine the image may be. The easier it is for people to accept, the more competition sb’s will have, and the harder it will be for the sb’s to keep a good image.

    Also, there are several people that are simply in what I like to call, “party mode.” Several sb’s for one reason, may simply want a good shagging from a guy that will actually attempt to pay attention to them, even if they’re not actual escorts. Or even just a guy that’ll ask them about their day, and tell them they’re really pretty instead of “lookit dat ass, my c*cks so hot for you, baby lemme hit dat.” Then again some girls LOVE dirty talk and that’s exactly what they want. (Save it for the bedroom when I’m spanking you and pulling your hair.) Sure, you ladies can all find boyfriends at the drop of a hat, or just a booty call, but some want to ride the pony and have the potential for more than taco bell.

    Moral of the story: There’s something here for everyone. Kiss the frog, baby.

  44. California SB says:

    “DON’T explicitly ask for sex. They are Sugar Babies, not escorts.”

    That line should be on the front page of the site. I also don’t like when a guy who has NO pictures on the site asking for more of me. I have 4 face pics of me and body pictures. What else they wanna see???

  45. Elizabeth Sweet says:

    Hello all !!

    Since were on the topic of messaging , I was wondering whats the accpetable number of pics someone can request before you write them off as a pic collector ? I send 4 full body and headshots ( snapshots) . I have a whole modeling portfolio ( NOT nude ) but I dont think they want to see those anyway . So what should you send , and how many ? And on the other hand — would you ever travel to meet someone who says they cant send you pic for discretion reasons ? I understand discretion is important , it is to me too . But I travel to meet someone and you have no idea of who youre meeting . . . . . seems risky .

  46. sassyteacher says:

    @JustAThoughtSD I wouldn’t be so proud about being an ‘early comer’. LOL haha – sorry, I couldn’t hold that one in.

    I have only been on SA for a couple of weeks but I think I can add one to the Don’ts
    – Don’t ever ask your pot SB if she smells good. If you get to the point of meeting your pot SB, you can take a sniff then and, so decide, whether or not you want to proceed. I truly did have someone ask me if I smelled good. You have to laugh at that one!


  47. travelersb says:

    I jumped also when I saw that ” they are human beings, not escorts ”
    Escorts are human beings and they deserve respect.

  48. Janine says:

    Hello all! I’ve found a great guy and we’re going to have our first date soon (I’m swooning like a school girl), but we haven’t talked about the “arrangement.”
    When is a good time to bring that up? I don’t want to seem pushy because I actually really like the guy, but I can’t forget why I’m here. Any advice?

  49. Goldfish says:

    I know the writer doesn’t mean anything by it, but escorts are also human beings and should be treated with respect.

    But as this is a different website, I think anyone who is out there solely for a sexual reason should rethink their entire approach. This is the wrong place for that. There are plenty of escort agencies and independents who can satisfy that need.

    I had someone recently who propositioned me for sex without meeting me while refusing to set up a lunch date.
    I immediately knew that was not going to work. Some people just do not get what this site is about, and it’s frustrating encountering them.

  50. ElizabethSweet says:

    Since were on the topic of messaging — when you first start email contact with someone and send pics ( I do on the first message – 3-4 snapshots full body and head shots ) , and they still ask for more right away , are they a pic collector ? He didnt even ask me anything else about myself , just for more pics . I also have portfolio images ( ive modeled for years) but I thought pot SDs typically perfered the snapshots . Should I send the modeling images as well ? What is enough ? Advice?

  51. NC Gent says:

    Hello all — hope everyone is doing well. My SB/gf and I got certified in scuba diving last week. It was great fun, but now we can’t wait to take the next scuba diving trip.

    regarding do’s and don’ts — Don’t poof! If you are corresponding with someone, just don’t fall of the face of the earth. Send them a note explaining. It can be as simple as … I have found a better match for me.

    Personally, I don’t really care if I someone doesn’t respond to my initial email, because to me that is the answer that they aren’t interested. I know from past blogs, people on here are about 50:50 on that.

  52. All American White Guy says:

    The wink is so not working. When a guy is getting 40 to 50 messages a day, a wink is checked for proximity and then deleted. No reply for something as thoughtless as a wink unless she’s in my own back yard.

    Speaking of proximity, 90% of the winks & messages I get are from women in other states. Seriously, my budget is $3 to $5 thousand a month. I have needs that aren’t being met. I need affection and someone to make me feel desirable after the recent breakup. Someone to make me feel good more than every other weekend. How does a girl in another state think she’s got any chance at all for that kind of budget being available to meet my needs, at most, twice a month? Whick would also include a bunch of cash for travel. I’ll never understand chick logic.

  53. Treasured says:

    And may I add, NEVER EVER use the pick up line such as “If you were a burger, you would be Mc’ Gorgeous!”

    And yes, it DID happen to me.

    Also, telling me straight away what you would want to do with me in bed, before you even know my name, also is not a good idea.

  54. SouthernCharmSB says:

    Ooohhhh! Lucky #3! Woohoo! Hi there, sugars!

    Guru – would you please give my email to Tina and vice versa? Thanks a billion! xo

  55. Circe says:

    @JaTSD: Yup…you were “first”…just like Columbus.

  56. JustAThoughtSD says:


  57. Leroy says:

    All personalities and perspectives are welcome in this blog, while personal attacks and name calling are not. It’s inevitable that there will be disagreements, but let’s handle it as mature adults with class to keep the dialog constructive and respectful. Please refer to “Blog Etiquette” on SeekingArrangement blog for more details.