6 years ago
The Sugar Affair: Everything You Need to Know
  • Posted Apr 18, 2014


We’re two weeks out from The Sugar Affair, and it’s time to make sweet preparations. In case you have any lingering questions, take a look at this comprehensive blog. Please add any additional questions in the comments section and I will answer them.


This is a chance for Sugar Babies to mingle with Sugar Daddies. It is located at Yotel New York. You can view party details on the homepage, here. We are having the party on the rooftop terrace overlooking Time Square. We are making this a special event catered to new college grads. If you are not a college grad or in school, you can still come.

You must be 21 years old to attend with a valid ID. You will need to have your ID ready to enter the party. If you do not have an ID, you have two weeks to get one. No exceptions, sorry.


Tickets are available  for purchase here: http://www.eventbrite.com/e/the-sugar-affair-tickets-11065718863

There has been some confusion about ticketing. Allow me to clarify.

  • Tickets admit one person. You must have your ticket at the door for entry.

  • No, you cannot bring a friend who does not have a ticket. They can buy their own ticket.

  • Tickets are transferrable, so you can sell it to someone else.

  • No refunds. Why? Because. Sorry.

  • Depending on when you buy your ticket, prices change. Early Bird tickets are on sale now. There is no difference in what you get for the different prices, the difference is when you purchase. For those who purchase their tickets early, there is a price break. That is the only difference in the tickets.

  • VIP tables are available for purchase. See the VIP section below for details.


  • There will be a VIP section reserved for bottle service and VIP Grads.

  • There will be 5 VIP College Grads selected.

  • VIP Grad winners will get reimbursed for their tickets, as well as a VIP table.

  • To be considered for VIP Grad, first purchase your ticket. Then, email [email protected]. In the email please include: your name, phone number, email, short bio, and 2 photos. We will contact you if you are a finalist.

  • There will be no press allowed in the VIP section.

  • If you are a College Sugar Baby, please email [email protected] and I will give you the VIP Grad promotional code.

  • Sugar Daddies who purchase VIP tables can bring whoever they want into VIP.


  • Since there will be media present at the event, we are encouraging everyone to bring a mask. This is also the theme of the party. It’s a masquerade.

  • While the dress code is strictly white and black, we are allowing colored masks.

  • If you do not have a mask or do not know where to get one, I recommend party stores.

  • If you don’t want to wear a mask, that’s fine. Please be advised you might be in the background of a video or picture.

  • From 9pm to 11pm, media will be present at the party. This is the time we are encouraging you to wear a mask.

  • At 11pm, the media will be gone, and masks can come off.

  • If you have any other questions about masks, please leave them in the comments and I will get back to you.


  • There will be cameramen and photographers at the party capturing this amazing event.

  • Please do not let this discourage you from attending. They will not bother you if you do not want to be involved, and you will have a mask on anyway.

  • We will have a professional photographer who can take your picture, and we will post them on our website after the event. I will update this blog with the link once they are posted.

  • The official hashtag for the event is #NYSugarAffair. Please tag this on all your pics for a chance to be featured on SA media.

  • If you are a member of the media and would like to request a press pass, please email [email protected].

Dress Code

  • This is a white and black party only. If you are not wearing white or black, you will not be admitted to the party. This goes for both men and women.

  • This is a formal affair. Please do not wear overly provocative or casual clothes.

  • Masks are encouraged and they can be other colors.

  • Make sure to look your best, since you never get a second chance to make a first impression.

LGBT Friendly

  • This is straight and LGBT mixed event.

  • If you aren’t sure who is LGBT or can’t find anyone, please ask for Brook and I will help you meet some new friends.

Media Interviews

  • We have opportunities to be interviewed by media at the event.

  • If you are not VIP and would like to get in, ask for Brook, and I will help you get into VIP when you participate in an interview.

  • We also have a “Sugar Secrets” booth where we will be filming anonymous sugar confessions. If you would like to participate, please ask for Brook.

  • You will be compensated with VIP entry and/or drink tickets for media participation.

After Party

  • We have a sponsored after party at Suite 36.

  • There will be free entry for Sugar Babies.

  • For girls in groups of six or more, you can get free table and bottle while supplies last.

  • Please ask for Brook if you have a party of six or more girls and I will arrange the table.

This is going to be an event in the heart of Time Square unlike any other. There will be drinks, food, and an exclusive chance to meet Sugar Daddies and Sugar Babies. If you have any immediate questions, please comment below or email [email protected].


I hope to see you there!

Leave a Reply

166 Responses to “The Sugar Affair: Everything You Need to Know”

  1. Miss Cali says:

    I am very experienced with this as well, 14 years, but this man now just doesn’t know how to stay consistent, very messy and it’s made me become messy! Next:)

  2. Miss Cali says:

    Bit of advise, if you’re wanting discreet relations with a SB or any woman, be honest, you never know that she may all ready know… And also is okay with it.. I can admit ive thrown the I love you thing out there, and honestly, I do love him, want the best for him rather with me or where ever his choices take him, to me it’s all about learning what the other person wants and being consistent with what I want, my man is so back and forth I don’t even know what is going on, but my 2 week trip to Cali sure have me some answers and my true feelings regarding this man, sad to say he is very much lost in life and not a good boy friend, friend, communicator, and not at all a good SD.. So I ask my self, what I’m I doing with this guy, I’ve made the choice to move around and let EW CHOOSE to do as he pleases, and remain friends after..

  3. MixedGirlNYC says:

    It was a great event! LOVED the outdoor space in VIP to get away from the crowd. The ladies definitely enjoyed the libations. *lol* Mnay were tipsy fairly quickly. The men were actually alot more attractive as well as younger than I expected! I was there to meet women however and was lucky enough to meet one on my own without any assistance from the SA staff. It did help that my fiance caught her eye! *wink* The passed light bites were all yummy. A friend got bottle service but I didn’t spend much time there to comment fairly. SA kept the press sequestered in an area behind a velvet rope and I didn’t feel the need for a mask although others did until the press left. Some even kept their masks on the entire night. Dress code was “interesting” and varied for some. (I saw a woman in a red dress! WTF?) There didn’t seem to be many bisexual or lesbian women there if any but I know that’s not what most of the commenters here care about. *lol*

  4. Aylene says:

    What does diamond member actually mean?Does it mean there wealth is verified.

  5. Zack says:

    Well, how’d it go? Anyone not on an SA payroll with two cents to chime in? Or not.

    www youtube.com/watch?v=5ZegQYgygdw

  6. M says:

    I’m so upset I can’t make it to this event. My girlfriend and I really wanted to attend but both had commitments. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE plan another event in the NYC area soon! We would definitely come to the next one.

  7. MixedGirlNYC says:

    Will there be Lesbian or Bisexual women there? Will there be women open to couples? There are tons of reviews on the internet but nothing regarding Bisexual women looking for a lady friend for herself or possibly to “share” with her heterosexual hubby. I have my ticket for tonight and am slightly nervous that there will be a ton of men there and very little options for me.

  8. Dollz says:

    This is going to b fun…

  9. Mel says:

    Sounds like a fun event! Wish I knew about this earlier so I can make arrangements. Is there any SD attending this event that wants to meet a hot babe? 😉

  10. Lady says:

    @RSD, may be next time you should try SB that can afford shoes, bags, vacations and etc. Not all SBs are “underpaid starbucks girls”.
    Anyways, it was fun reading all of this, I even took my time to comment on it.

  11. SweetVictorie says:

    @Zach…if your last comment was offering an answer to my inquiry…Yes, im in NY/LI at least once or twice a month, the scenario & such are compatible…and Thank you!
    3yr sd/sb relationship just ended…job transfer. Awesome times and still happy to reconnect.
    Time for a new fabulous encounter!
    The “Seek” is on!

    I’m sure I’ll be able to acclimate

  12. honeybunz says:

    Heyy ..
    How’s everyone today ?(:

  13. Zack says:

    If you could see yourself with a NYC (travel, schedule, etc compatible) I would if I were you.

    As you’re new, that doesn’t leave much time to learn the ropes, though. Can you start seeking a few months ago? There’s a learning curve…

    www youtube.com/watch?v=j3nBuwOPu8A

  14. SweetVictorie says:

    Hi all.
    @Russian…u r a smart cookie!
    @Fat…probing, funny!
    So, I’m reading…trying to get a feel (oooh lala).
    Should I actually avoid this event, as I’m an SB in my early 30s, no kids, not married and love a great party! I’m from NY, love NY and it sounds like fun. The whole college grad invite is very specific.
    I also know that different men adore choice…shall I put myself in the pit? I love to play dirty!
    What do you think?

  15. Zack says:

    FB: Planning on attending any parties in the next week or two? Enquiring minds…
    www youtube.com/watch?v=4UZKb8wuSg4

  16. Russian SB says:

    Thank you , Elaine, for your warm words !

  17. Josh says:

    @Russian SB

    “Josh, no ! Brain virgin.”


  18. Elaine says:

    @ Russian,

    You are hilarious, sorry for your marriage, but glad you are back on blog! 🙂

  19. Russian SB says:

    Yes, Fatty, men are so tough in Russia , that they touch naked ac/dc wire like naked woman – with bare hands !

  20. Russian SB says:

    Josh, no ! Brain virgin. I am dream of every man – stupid and beautiful !

  21. FatBastardSA says:

    @Russian SB

    In America, you eat pussy.
    In Soviet Russia, pussy eats you!

    I am watching you Russian SB. Especially when you are in the shower…

  22. Josh says:

    @Russian SB

    I had thought that you were virgin. Penis virgin? 😉

  23. Russian SB says:

    I prefer to be eaten out, I guess 🙂 and I didn’t die from it 🙂

  24. Josh says:

    How about the “average” FEMALE body struture, rather? 😉

  25. Josh says:

    How about the “average” body struture? 😉

  26. Zack says:

    In any case, should they show, don’t be slow.

    Off remark: Kat, are you busy this weekend? Would you like to be?
    //www youtube.com/watch?v=jc7r_B0ZWDY

  27. FatBastardSA says:


    Yeah but he also claims PriceySpicey is hot.

    @Russian SB

    They may eat the fat ones but they will probe the anus of the skinny ones. I would rather get eaten.

    How about you, do you prefer to be probed in the anus or eaten out?

    My god I am a brilliant comic!

  28. Josh says:


    It seems that at least on SD has voluntarily scummed to such force wrapped in beautiful packaging. 😉

  29. Russian SB says:

    Fatty, when alliens will come, first they will eat the fat ones 🙂

  30. FatBastardSA says:

    I see that the forces of communism are back on the blog. I hope that all of the SD’s are being extra cautious.

  31. Josh says:

    Someone from the blog asked me if I were interested in PUA.

    I have never been interested in PUA, and I will NEVER try to pick up random women. There’s just too much bullshit that one has to put up with in that line of endeavor.

    God Bless SA. 😉 I focus on keeping the dough flowing, SA does the rest.

    Meeting a gorgious 24 year-old with a model figure tonight. 12 messages waiting in the inbox which I hav not read yet. Life is GOOD! 🙂

  32. Kms2014 says:

    Forgive me everyone, slow day at work today, but did notice this from link I posted yesterday, from that gaming site. Maybe, should have gotten RSD to read this 😉 And, I wonder if I am what constitutes the ‘old hag’ category, hehehe 😉

    Not being serious here…this made me laugh when I read it, although, I think the guy who posted it was pretty serious….

    “The typically SA or EM (seeking arrangement or established men) female member knows her situation and the attractive ones are just looking for a guy that has the ability to enjoy an upscale life rather than some scrub who she has to pay his bills as well as hers. These sites do have a few hags but also many very sexy and attractive ladies looking for a good man without the match.com marriage or common law wife divorce lottery sugar plum fairies dancing around their hampster brains.

    Question is with common law evolving into extreme PC lunacy does one need an arrangement agreement along the lines of a prenup to establish the relationship as basically FWB friends with benefits and NOT a marriage, pre-marriage or worse common law marriage. As usual the states family/divorce law attorneys (raging feminists) will have their claws into anywhere they smell money and can grab their 33%. No worse than hooking up day or night game style with your local snowflakes.

    All in all more likely to get what you want without the nasty legal side effects in an arrangement than the alternatives as at least these ladies know the score the moment they sign up.”

    I wonder if SA ever does damage control on these gaming sites….just curious…

  33. Zack says:

    @RSD Thank you for the recent conversation.

    @Josh Do you find people often suggest, “You miss the point?”

    @ Brook Thanks. “Hi!”

    @ Ladies, esp Beach:
    www youtube.com/watch?v=xMGatR8SNns

  34. Kms2014 says:

    Nothing wrong with building with trying to help build more confidence in any man(or women). Since, some if these guys do have trouble interacting with women and just want a girlfriend many times….

  35. Kms2014 says:

    Yeah, don’t go to the dark side, Josh….At least the Girlschase guy is pretty adamant about building confidence in men without female hate. They are still gamers, but kinder gentler gamers who try to help the shy guys or socially inept guys have more confidence. Although, it is still gaming so….most of the time it is 20 something men looking to game 20 something women.

  36. Josh says:


    I guess you should not have posted about that blog. LOL! I had read about this guy some time ago but did not read his blog until you posted his name here. 😉

  37. Kms2014 says:

    @Beachgirl…Good luck on your interview (:

    I probably shouldn’t have posted anything about that guy and his blog, justl thought it was interesting that SA was mentioned.

    Gamers are funny(the misogynistic ones that grew up having no luck with dates or getting any women) in that they harbor so much disdain on women as little more than a sexual disposal device and such, yet ironically, it is the women they are ‘gaming’ that they seek to validate their often non-existent self esteem. The woman hating gaming claims to take the ‘man’ power back, yet all it does is place even more power to the women, in that they are getting all their ‘ego bolstered’ then bragging about it online from said gaming the women.

    Luckily, I am too old to be bothered with any gamers and the silliness that is usually saved for the 20’s age group 😉 I remember when it was more popular years ago, and being out with my friends, then having some of the lame tactics used on us. I always found it amusing, since it is so obvious and only works on young and insecure women. A secure confident man would never use such tactic–just like a secure and confident woman would never fall for it. It was to be pretty big in certain cities and they held
    seminars teaching men all about the game. I don’t think it is as big anymore, since many women figured out the tactics and many of the game community were called out for being cheesy douches.

    I helped my friend for a Graduate school project that examined many different PUA sites. There are certain gamers that preach more confidence building and less women(cat) hate. Girlschase is one. His site has several men on his forum with social disorders such as Aspergers and other conditions that make it harder for them to approach women. But, at the end of the day, you have to ask yourself…what is this person’s game on me? What are they trying to sell me? Are they really trying to help, or help themselves to a bunch of insecure men’s wallets?

  38. Josh says:

    @Russian SB

    “Josh, I know, it is the guy who discovered that cats have conspirasy theory, and one day they dominate the world. We are already giving them roof and food in exchange of questionable service”

    That’s hilarious…and I wonder at times why people keep cats as pet. 🙂

  39. Josh says:

    @Russian SB

    Can’t go wrong with Shakespeare and his philosophy. 😉

  40. KatPaw says:

    @Beach Girl go in there with a positive can do attitude and you’ll fly with vibrant colors! Good positive vibes your way!

    @Eloquence hey sweetheart positive golden vibes your way as well! Email me let me know how things are going 🙂

  41. Russian SB says:

    There are more things in Heaven and Earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.

  42. Russian SB says:

    Josh, I know, it is the guy who discovered that cats have conspirasy theory, and one day they dominate the world. We are already giving them roof and food in exchange of questionable service 🙂

  43. Josh says:


    Role model? Hmmm, why is he my role model all of a sudden?

    If I wrote “to be or not to be” then does Shakespeare become my role model?

    I am an empirical kinda guy. When I read anything I compare it with the realities on the ground I am facing…

    The guy is playing the field on a daily basis OR making it all up. Who knows…but if what he writes is laced with realities I am facing in my interaction with women then he has my attention… 😉

  44. Josh says:

    Another good one…

    “The War Against Men”

    I don’t care for the second half of the last sentence. I have no interest in finishing anything. 😉

  45. Elaine says:

    My God Josh!!

    You know I don’t always agree with everything you are saying, especially your view on women in general.
    But I have never doubted your intelligence the way I am doing now!


    This guy is too bad an example to take anything he is saying for serious!

    The classical loser, always ignored by the chearleaders he desired soooooo badly.
    And now showing this frustration on his blog, trying to make all women look bad. Sad enough not realising that every good reader understands it tells more about HIM, as it does about women.

    So childish and sad……
    Try to find a better rolemodel!

  46. Eloquence says:

    @Katpaw & @ Beachgirl

    You bring forth the sun where ever your prescence enters and may all whom gaze see you shine!

  47. Josh says:

    Interesting RooshV article. 😉

    “Men Are Nothing More Than Clowns To The Modern Woman”

  48. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars

    Wish me luck and send positive vibes my way. I have a big job interview today.. feeling anxious a little 😀

  49. KatPaw says:

    Meow sugarrrrrrs here’s to a positively bright day! 🙂

  50. Russian SB says:

    SD Guru exchange our e-mails with Richard, please, we are planning picknic in Siberia, he is the man who not looking for easy solutions !

  51. Russian SB says:

    Richard, Dick – it is short name for Richard, and it sound awesome, especially with matching surname.

  52. flyr says:

    RSD “the ability to chat with “online now””

    For me conversing by email for a few exchanges before going to voice has some advantages. I’m more focused on the thoughts than the presentation.

    My other concern is that instant chat is likely to make this more of an escort site.

    There are also lots of “online now” who simply left themselves online while they go about their lives.

  53. Beach_Girl says:

    I can do accents very well… no mink coat though… 🙁 sorry… you’ll have to bring that 😛

  54. KatPaw says:

    @Beach Girl you are right the search is tedious but with patience the end reward with a bit of luck is worth it.

  55. Richard says:

    @Beach Girl – Can you do a Russian accent? Have a mink coat? 🙂

  56. Beach_Girl says:

    Richard~ What about Lithuanians??? lol… 😀 good luck with your Russian fantasy 😛

  57. Beach_Girl says:

    Kat~Yes, the search is hard, but if and when you find the right SD, it makes the efforts so worth it 😀

  58. KatPaw says:

    Kms yes the joy of the weeding out process not something I look forward too and have lots of weeding till you find one decent pot

  59. Kms2014 says:

    ): yes, it can be very difficult and tedious to go through the ‘weeding out’ process all over again, unfortunately…And, there is a lot of weeding out to do on there. You will find someone else, though (: Just takes time and such…

  60. KatPaw says:

    RSD that is a good suggestion and also thought the same thing would be nice to have.

  61. KatPaw says:

    @Beach Girl gotta love the poofers! I hope you’re right about the right one coming my way! I’ve got do much pent up I need working out 😉 purrrrr

  62. RSD says:

    I’ve been a great fan of SA for five years now and I think it’s a great site. But there is one thing that would make it even better–the ability to chat with “online now” members (for a fee would be fine). Honestly so many things can be discussed and settled in a five minute chat that would take too much back and forth emailing. I’d think a lot less about pressing “chat” than whether to send a message and this can both facilitate interactions and make a good bit of money for SA. There could be a charge for each member who accepts a chat and many SDs won’t mind a reasonable fee for that. I’ll gladly take royalties from the fees–I think it’d be a big hit.

  63. KatPaw says:

    @Kms name of the game I guess. This last SD is a very good man but his health makes it pretty much impossible at least in his opinion to continue. Just frustrated really.

  64. Beach_Girl says:

    Kat~ I hear you, it’s hard to find a good SD. I had one pot SD but he poofed. It sucks, but just think that maybe he wasn’t the one for you. You will someone just for you soon 🙂 don’t worry…
    My problem lately is that most SDs that contact me are smokers…
    I am almost one year smoke free 😀 so I don’t want a smoker SD…
    And typing away emails, I’m not really good at. I over think everything 😀

  65. Kms2014 says:

    No, would be very scared of the music that is probably going to be played at that event…just imagining cheesy men and cheesier music, but then again, I can be very cynical 😉

    Katpaw, sorry you are having bad luck…do not fancy the ‘all talk and no action type’.

  66. KatPaw says:

    Ugh I just want a reliable SD sick of words and not actions! Sorry my gripe for the day! And now ACTIVELY searching for new SD 🙁

  67. Beach_Girl says:

    Curious, Is anyone from this blog going to the event?

    SA has 5 million users? I had no idea.

  68. Beach_Girl says:

    I don’t know we would trust that the media would take pics only if we wanted them to…..And there are always a lot more SBs there than SDs.

    There have always been flirting on the blog, I think it’s great that some people click and others want to know more about one another.

  69. Josh says:

    Thanks Brook for detailed responses. Even though I won’t be attending, I wish you a successful event and I am looking forward to the next significant milestone for SA of 5,000,000 members soon. 🙂

  70. Richard says:

    @KMS – I’m a man…you’re next! 🙂

  71. Eloquence says:

    @ RSD

    Cheers to love then….

    YouTube: Pittbull and G.R.L. “Wild Wild Love”

  72. Kms2014 says:

    Richard…hitting on blog SB?

  73. Elaine says:

    @ Saw only the back Richard, not the full monthy !*lol*

  74. Richard says:

    @Russ SB – Are you saying I have a short Dick? Just ask Elaine, that’s definitely not true…she’s seen me naked! Moscow is a little bit out of the range of my plane, but there’s always commercial…and it’s only about eight hours. 🙂

    Blog Gods, can you share my email with Russian SB? I’d like to do my part to improve Russian-American relations. I’ve always had this fantasy involving a beautiful Russian girl, a mink coat, caviar, a bottle of vodka, and….well…this is a PG blog right? 😛

  75. Russian SB says:

    Some simbolic 10 hours flight separate us, what a romantic arrangement we can have ! I hope, they will not close the borders in that “game of thrones” , like it was in Soviet. I am broken hearted , and I really wish to have fun summer with a man with a short name Dick… We were born for each other !

  76. Josh says:

    Numbers game is the only game that works in any endeavor in life. As you master the “game” the hit ratio increases. Thats all.

    Based on the information provided, you might want to keep it simple and straightforward. No fairytales…Otherwise one of them SBs in love might create the kind of headache you might not want to deal with. 😉

  77. Elaine says:

    Haha right, let them dream on!

    A lot of young SB’s would be so shocked if they would know the truth…. 😉

  78. Kms2014 says:

    @Elaine…yes, indeed 😉 also, I read on one of those RooshV forums not too long ago, how they were making fun of us ‘old’ SB saying how desperate we are(old being over 25, of course, hehe) and how we answer emails ‘straight away’ and will take any SD we can get because we are so old and desperate, hehehe 😉

  79. Kms2014 says:

    @Mr. RSD, oh my apologies…I read that as you asked many out at mall, and she thought she was the only one…

    I don’t know…I agree with Elaine that focusing on finding SB outside of SA might be riskier for your home life…especially, if she doesn’t really ‘fully understand’ the discreet issue…and hopefully, you tell these women you are married. That makes a woman so angry, if she finds out she was lied to about one’s marital situation. Not saying you are doing this, but it does happen. However, with that being said, I’m pretty sure there were SB/SD relationships before SA. Just probably not as many…and SA has probably caused so many to be taken advantage of by both sides…it truly can be an evil or wonderful site.

  80. Elaine says:

    @ Kms

    Was thinking the same after having read some old posts of RSD….

  81. RSD says:

    Kms, you must’ve missed my previous posts. She was the only girl I asked out at the mall. Yes, conceivably, I could pretend in the future like I’ve never done that before, but that is hypothetical. I tend to tell people all my history on the first date so they don’t get hiked up expectations.

  82. Kms2014 says:

    But, see you are playing games and not being ‘upfront’. To me, sugar dating is supposed to be direct and upfront–no games–no illusions or ‘feeding the fairy tale’. A real sugar baby doesn’t want a ‘fairy tale’ with some married man…trust me on this, hehe.

    I am beginning to see why you might have problems in your past sugar relationships…are you getting
    off a little on ‘feeding these girls the illusion you ‘think’ they want’? Really? Sugar dating is not meant to be some gaming technique. Seems to me, your verbiage used to describe your past encounters… they are not the words that I think a real and straightforward sugar daddy would use…such as, ‘telling her I only went to see her at mall, when really you were asking out tons of girls to see who took bait for game with your friend, illusions of fairy tales, and temptations…

  83. Elaine says:


    Of course also people on SA can have this reaction, but I think it is less likely.
    An experienced SB will be less impressed by your lifestyle as an innocent Starbucks waitress, and less desperate when the “fairytale” ends….

    And another thing; the experienced SB will return to the site and try to find another SD to provide her with new Sugar. She knows how it works.
    The Starbucks girl, thinking it was “love” between the two of you might react very impredictable….losing her “love” and having lost also a lifestyle she had never dreamed of before!

  84. RSD says:

    @Kms, well the one time I did that, I made it clear to the girl that it was just her I was asking out and she was the only reason I even went to a mall 45 minutes away from where I live and work. Fed into the fairytale magical thinking I suppose. Temptation is a strange thing though. In my case, I left her a business card and told her she’d get $4K/mo and let her mull it over. Of course, she googled me and, well, google is a powerful marketing agent for an SD who gives up his anonymity.

  85. Kms2014 says:

    My guess is that the guys you turned down when you were in retail may have had better success than you may think if they were “carpet bombing”. If a guy goes to the mall and makes an indecent proposal to 30 girls, all he needs is one or two to say yes. I’ve done this just once and based on that had 100% success rate (I was challenged to do it because I made too many claims that almost any woman can be tempted, so a guy I worked with challenged me to pick up the hottest girl he had hand-picked and tried unsuccessfully to pick up himself at his local mall–she insisted to him that she had a bf lol). Anyways, by this point in life who cares about those who are not interested; the real issue is how to deal with those who are.

    @RSD…I don’t know how to respond to this because if a guy, who asked me out in retail or waitressing, back in the day was married, and offering things, then of course I assumed he probably did the same thing to others. Unless, we had some sort of friendship or connection(in theory) would I assume that he only was asking me. I used to know single guys acquaintances like that…they told me that they operated in ‘the numbers game’ and asked as as many women as they could, since eventually,
    someone would say, ‘yes’. Of course, this is just statistics, in that if you ask a certain number of women, then eventually ‘one or more’ will say, yes. But, at your age, is this really the ‘game’ you want to play? I always found this tactic quite desperate, and a turn-off, but hey, it is your life….

  86. RSD says:

    Elaine is right, but I think even people who are on SA can have the same reaction to the fairytale. My life is just no fairytale though, but I think from outside it looks like to people (heck, all these people talk about how I have the perfect marriage too lol).

    And Josh is right–you do need a strategy and not one that puts the girl on the spot. But sugar dating has existed for millenia before Seeking Arrangement, and people have worked out arrangements all sorts of ways. There may be a little more work before you can cut to the chase, but I’m sure there is a lot more IRL sugar dating that goes on that internet-based sugar dating.

  87. Josh says:

    Sugar arrangements are being made everyday.

    I have done it in the past but it is not as easy as just walking up to a girl and offering allowance. And definitely NOT when one’s wife is few yards away.

    It takes time and effort.

    Typical strategy that has worked for me is:

    – Friendly and flirty gestures.
    – Dropping larger than customary tips.
    – Showing empathy for her hard work.
    – Asking her out for a quick date.
    – Learning about her financial challenges, and then make appropriate offer when the time is right.

    If she is not into older guys she would just decline the date offer without ever finding out about the financial benefits which would follow.

    On the other habd the escorty types would lay it out up front that it was going to cost you.

    Like anything else in life, it is a process…and hence the SA site to optimize the process. 😉

  88. Elaine says:

    @ kms & rsd

    That is exactly what immediately came up in my mind too!
    If you already have problems with SB’s falling in love with you ( women that are supposed to understand the rules of the NSA game) Don’t you think this risk is even much higher if you pick up a girl at Starbucks??

    Put yourself in her shoes;
    You are at work and a nice looking, friendly guy walks in and asks you for a date.
    You agree, and he takes you to the amazing kind of place you have never been before with the guys you are usually dating, and the two of you have a great evening and there is a big click.
    Another date is following and than this great guy tells you that he likes you so much, he would like to make your life easier by giving you a monthly “allowance” ( Whaaaat??? OMG!!!!)

    …..Would you NOT fall in love and hope this fairytale would last forever??

  89. RSD says:

    Yes, it has been claimed on the blogs that IRL women would be more likely to develop attachments that women on SA. Can’t say that’s entirely true from my own experience.

    My guess is that the guys you turned down when you were in retail may have had better success than you may think if they were “carpet bombing”. If a guy goes to the mall and makes an indecent proposal to 30 girls, all he needs is one or two to say yes. I’ve done this just once and based on that had 100% success rate (I was challenged to do it because I made too many claims that almost any woman can be tempted, so a guy I worked with challenged me to pick up the hottest girl he had hand-picked and tried unsuccessfully to pick up himself at his local mall–she insisted to him that she had a bf lol). Anyways, by this point in life who cares about those who are not interested; the real issue is how to deal with those who are.

  90. Kms2014 says:

    Plus, I thought you mentioned earlier that you have the dilemma of all SB falling in love with you 😉 I would say, and this is just my opinion, that you might run the risk of that happening off of SA, versus a seasoned SB, on SA, who already knows all the rules(or, should, hopefully) and is experienced. Just my thoughts….

  91. Kms2014 says:

    @RSD…you are married…I remember being a hot little 20 something and married guys, in their 30’s and 40’s, used to ‘offer things’ and ‘indecent proposals’ here and there(I worked in retail and waitressing, in my early 20’s). Back then, I would kindly tell the gentleman, whose wife had walked away for a moment, or had his wedding ring on to, ‘take a hike’. I was a feisty idealist back then, and never would have even entertained the thought of a SD. Then, I would tell my female friends and we would make fun saying ‘gross, disgusting..what a creep! Hope we don’t marry men like that one day!’, then giggle about where
    we were going for the night/weekend to meet hot guys our age.

    Of course, I do not feel this way now…but it took me until my mid-thirties to be open to a true ‘arrangement’ 😉 Not saying that all young girls will turn you down–of course, there will be SB out in the real world, but not every girl you approach(offer/hint money/lifestyle improvements) to at Starbucks will
    be flattered…or, take you up on it. Plus, some of those girls working at Starbucks might be going to a really good Uni, while their boyfriend is also in a great school and works, so he has money to take her out. I remember having boyfriends my own age before I got married, and they would buy me things and take me out…not all 20 something men are broke cads. Plus, what if some of these broke 20 something men come from money and have rich parents? Or, that girl working at Starbcuks is religious, and would be offended by your offers. So many variables, which is why I agree with Russian, in that you need good SBdar tracking intuition. It is a chance you take, when you go places that are not SB specific.

  92. KatPaw says:

    My heart is one thing that has never been and never will be able to be bought.. I don’t think a heart can truly be bought either!

  93. RSD says:

    Russin and KMS, I think you guys underestimate the power of temptation. All I do is put a thought into their head and let the temptation do its work. There is no pressure. They can get back to me if/when they want. It won’t take long for their boss to get after them for nothing or for them to see a pair of shoes they can’t afford and the temptation keeps popping up in their minds. People sell their souls to money, buying hearts and bodies is easy.

  94. RSD says:

    @SDGuru, well, to recap a long and tumultuous year, SB did consider the other guy and that didn’t work out well for her, I considered other SBs and that didn’t work out well for me, and we ended up back together on and off. She is leaving town in a few weeks for a four-year program. She really has no option but to leave (she does bring up quitting her career path to be my wife, but that is not what I’d ever want for her), and I hope she finds happily-ever-after. For some reason, I do not think that her being 1500 miles away will completely end things, but I don’t think about it too much and kind of hope that a charming boy sweeps her off her feet out there. My life is kinda stagnant so I’m not exactly going anywhere, but she needs to live her life. I even really tried to be just friends but that didn’t last either. Oh well. I hope life sorts itself out and she finds happiness.

    @Josh, as to why I don’t get divorced, it’s simple. I don’t want to end up divorced, remarried, and back on this site. Or even divorced not remarried and on this site. At least I give my kids a facade of a normal stable existence and there is no reason to rob them of that when I, sadly, don’t see my own situation being any different with someone else. Perhaps I’m just too much of a sex addict for one woman to take care of my needs, who knows.

  95. KatPaw says:

    Happy Monday sugarrrrs! This kitty hoping a little new sugar comes my way soon 😉 this kitty ready to pounce! Hehehe

  96. flyr says:

    Richard “with your own pilot and a roomy cabin”

    Neither That’s why god made autopilots (they never tell) It’s a little clumsy when SOCAL approach wants to chat

  97. Richard says:

    @Russian SB – Unmarried and a virgin? Dances with bears and gypsies? I’m in love…checking flights to Moscow now (I’m a dinosaur). 😉

    @Flyr – Aha! The old “let’s fly to Catalina for bison burgers” ploy. I’ve used that one myself on occasion. It’s a nice way to subtly convey both your wealth (you own a plane?) and your competence (and you fly it yourself?). I’ve never consummated it on the flight back, though, you must be richer than I (with your own pilot and a roomy cabin). 🙂

  98. Josh says:

    @Russian SB

    Welcome back. I have read your posts in older blog pages. You have an interesting sense of humor. 😉

  99. Russian SB says:

    SD Guru – I am sorry too ! About marriage. My woman happines was so close, so close…
    Alas ! Details – he is not from blog, he is not from sugar mix. But he is sweet as candy.
    Almost made me diabetic … Decent man. That dissapearing type of gentelmen.
    Where we going to get me another one, SD Guru ? I am asking you ???
    Those dinosaurus dying every day !!!

  100. Russian SB says:

    Flyr, by history, I mean Henrich VIII ! Not Stalin 🙂

  101. Russian SB says:

    Flyr… I am in Moscow , where I am belong ! Dancing with gipsies and bears with balalaika and matreshka !
    Congratulate Russians with Olimpics, and un-congratulate with Cold War, dear bloggers.
    Always yours,
    Still virgin , unmarried Russian SB

  102. Russian SB says:

    Flyr, history teach us, that girls prefer useless users. And , save god to tell : ” you will serve cofe all your life ! You don’t understand what a lottery ticket I am for you, baby !”.
    Just today I get letter with such content, and I report the guy to SA.
    As anapropriate content !
    (The fun side that 30 coffee ladies are working for me).

  103. flyr says:

    @Russian – Whaere have you been

  104. flyr says:

    Ruskie “She is goodlooking ? Then 99% that she has boyfriend. Not everybody arround are in your menu.”

    Very high probability that “boyfriend” is useless user. And those are his best traits.

    My experience is that a soft approach works perhaps 10% of the time. Capture her intellectual interests or adventure interests. Museum success rate probably 25%; fly over to Catalina for lunch probably 50% with a high % consummated on the flight back. It’s like any other situation, what is she not getting in her life- fun, adventure, respect, intellectual stimulation, financial support, enough oral stimulation to have the neighbors worried. The timeless intel acronym is mice; money, influence compromise (not relevant here) ego . You have to appeal to something.

  105. Kms2014 says:

    @RussianSB…very true and spot on…unless, you have good male intuition about these sort of things, then I would tread carefully, Mr. RSD, or I see a slap or two in your future 😉

  106. Russian SB says:

    RSD, if you act in real life like in sugar life, you will be called rude and gross. What do you mean, girl in Starbucks underpaid, so she dream about questionable affair with married man ?? No woman deserve it. She is goodlooking ? Then 99% that she has boyfriend. Not everybody arround are in your menu. Some men have a talent to find sugar in any place, they are charming gentelmen with outstanding intuition. Such man turn me into sugar baby. I lived in lifestyle before even knowlege of lifestyle been in my mind. Now, any man I am dating I can talk into sugar relationship. With sugar, and with borders. BUT I do it very slow and in very delicate manner.

    • SD Guru says:


      Welcome back to the blog! It’s been over a year since your last post which may give your fellow bloggers some clues to your conundrum. Whatever happened to your last SB? It seems that you specialize in being in “love” with your SB’s. My guess is that they either tell you what they think you want to hear or they see you as their ticket to a better life.

      @Russian SB

      Welcome back! Sorry to hear about the marriage that wasn’t. More details please? The blog will be livelier with you around! :mrgreen:

  107. Josh says:


    I can see that you age “may” have something to do with it. You are at the lower end of the SD age.

    You had mentioned that you did not want to get out of the current marriage. Is there something about your marriage dynamics that these SBs are getting ideas from?

  108. RSD says:

    Texas, over texting can become a problem. The best is to take a while to respond and respond in ways that tend not to lend to ongoing conversations. I often send just a smiley face to acknowledge their text but not encourage endless back and forth.

  109. RSD says:

    Josh, my profile is pretty straight-forward. I make it clear I’m looking for one medium to longer term sugar arrangement (several months to a couple of years if it works out). I search for 18-35 (I’m late 30s), most races, non-smoker, social drinker, slim/athletic. I avoid people who give me escortish vibes. Perhaps that’s where I go wrong, avoiding the more transactional or overtly sexual type people.

    On a totally separate note, I haven’t done IRL sugar dating for a while. Any thoughts about approaching the cute but underpaid and underappreciated girl working at the mall or Starbucks? I was quite tempted to ask out the girl working at the Target Starbucks last week and offer her a compensated date, but then I wasn’t sure if that was too inappropriate (I don’t want to offend someone I’m trying to compliment). I’ve internet sugar dated so much I’ve lost my grasp on reality and what’s appropriate and what’s not (my directness about money can be taken in the wrong way IRL). I did ask out someone like that a few years back and she said yes (I didn’t offer her money for the first date but brought up a monthly allowance when I approached her) but I wasn’t interested after two dinner dates and she was pissed. But that same dynamics can happen with any dating (I now tend to pay any SB I meet for the first date so that if I’m not interested, which is typically the case, they don’t feel like I completely wasted their time or used them to not feel lonely or whatever). Perhaps some of the SBs have thoughts on or experience with or advice regarding the topic of approaching a total stranger IRL with an indecent proposal.

  110. Russian SB says:

    Actually, it is nice when young cute girls fall in love with you. Enjoy it ! One day they start run away from you …

  111. Moe EL says:

    Party outside on the terrace is always fun unless mother nature disapprove. Wonder if there will be a back up plan.

  112. Texas says:

    @RSD- In my field of study, you would have what some may call fatal attraction/obsessive type SB. I would most def proceed with caution, you most certainly do not need someone who cannot understand the rules of the game or mess with your personal/family life.

  113. Texas says:

    I find this discussion a little scary because I don’t want to have a SD relationship with any strings attached. I have yet to meet the potential SD I am currently talking to because he texts me non stop and I have become overwhelmed by it. I’m afraid that if I do pursue a relationship with him, it will not turn out good. I need space…oh so much of it! I am not one of those SB who wants to fall in love, I just want to get my life on track 🙁

  114. Russian SB says:

    RSD try Prada perfume that smell like cheap sigars … I don’t remember the name of it, but all sellers know ! The truth is that some girls love money and presents so much, that they don’t mind the smell.

  115. Russian SB says:

    Hi , Sugars ! Sorry, I was not blogging, because I was not fishing last time, almost marry in January. What a guy… I will never again jump to such high level. It was my last chance to send my future unborn kids to famouse bording shcoole…
    Hope you all fine , and not having disasters equal to mine.

  116. Josh says:


    I am really curious to know about your profile, what brought your to the sugarbowl, the profiles you search for, etc. This is to try to figure out what’s up with the repeated one-side “love” from the SBs.

    Please share whatever you can. If it is too personal, then please ignore.


  117. KatPaw says:

    Lmao maybe you should RSD maybe you should 😉

  118. RSD says:

    Time to change my cologne 😉

  119. Beach_Girl says:

    RSD~ you don’t want to make the same mistakes, then make it clear, communicate with your potential SB and maybe try and get someone that understand this… emotions are a normal thing, love in sugar… no…

  120. KatPaw says:

    Wanting to change your life like that isn’t love but obsession! Lol Does your cologne have a special pheromone elixir in it?

  121. RSD says:

    Btw, the three examples I gave are from three different SBs.

  122. RSD says:

    Eloquence, the love I worry about isn’t just empty words. It’s when an SB cries till her clothes and the couch we’re sitting are are soaked with tears because I’ll be gone for one week. It’s when an SB tell me she didn’t sleep all night because of love for me. It’s when an SB wants to change her life and quit her career to marry me. I can honestly go on and on. I don’t know what else love is. It is real and it hurts them and it hurts me and it is not just one person I’ve run into this with. I’m not an idiot to mistake some stripper/escort telling me she loves me for true love.

  123. KatPaw says:

    Sugar is not the place to be looking for love. “In love” doesn’t belong in a sugarship… Caring and fondness absolutely! I have a great hubby and I plan to keep him forever! Not looking for a replacement just extra fun and excitement in sugar! Purrrrrrrrrr

  124. RSD says:

    Yes, I discounted the first use of the L word which occurred in the context of sex. But the rest of the times she was quite sober. And I did very bluntly address the “L” and “forever” words each time after the first, hoping that I’d put an end to it. I’d had enough of being victimized by sugar baby “love” to want to hear the L word ever again. I pay too much to be loved lol.

    In fact, I’m on this site only to avoid having a love mistress who is driven not by financial gain but by the hope of marrying me (been there, done that, it sucks). I really think I do something wrong, but I can’t pinpoint what. Honestly, when I was single, no girl ever seemed to love me, but then again I was a dorky nerd back then and now I’m more charming and confident and rich. But in all seriousness, I do need a solution to this problem. I’m thinking of finding another SB but I’m horrified of the prospect of someone else falling in love with me :/

  125. Eloquence says:

    @ RSD

    Love you very much…trade you very much…

    Ever wonder if she messed up “big time” in a sense because she no longer fancied the way you “traded her”..a.k.a. “loved her” since.so many fall in love you.

    Compliments of Webster: love 1. An intense feeling of deep affection.
    2. A person or thing that one loves.
    3. Feel a deep romantic or sexual attachment to someone.

    Greetings conveyed out of affection….

    How.do I love thee? Let me count the ways..
    Did you ever once ask.your SB “how” she “loved” you?

    The list is endless….and God.gives love…freely…but its a “mind game” in the Jockey club?

  126. Richard says:

    @RSD – Don’t confuse “I love the way you f*ck me” with “I love you.” And only believe a women who uses the L word when she is sober and not post coital. 🙂

  127. Beach_Girl says:

    RSD~ omg, now I’m curious about the blog SB lol… 😀
    first, you know that newbies to the site are more impressionable. 2- make the rules clear and stick to them, if the L word comes up, adress it right away and if she uses the forever love then end it no matter if you look like an ass or not. It will be better for both of you.
    Saying the L word While having sex, I’m not sure that really counts??!?!?!!? I may be the same as oh god? but adress it right away, don’t wait and make things harder…

  128. flyr says:

    @Southern “@Flyr Well you could always encourage all of the men in upper management to go with you to the party, that way you all would be “guilty” and nobody would have to say a word”

    Of course, why did I not think of that. Reporter woman would never mention that half of the board of directors of zzz conservative company or the entire school board were at a party looking for SB’s.

  129. RSD says:

    Three of them were newbies to sugar dating (in fact, one of the three was a very active blog SB). But a fourth one had a VERY long history of sugar dating and I chose her in part because I figured she’d know the rules better than anyone. Yet, the first time we did it, the L word slipped out. I chose to ignore it and assume it was some sort of game she was playing, but a couple dates later the “forever” word came up, then the L word again a few times. Luckily, she screwed up big-time and I got a good excuse to end things without looking like an insensitive ass. But the L word makes me feel so trapped, like it’s some sort of form of control or some sort of pressure tactic to make something that is fine for me but great for the SB last forever.

    The lesson is simple–fondness for SD is OK, true love is not. Wanting to spend time with SD is great, wanting to spend every moment forever is not.

  130. Zack says:

    Hey, Josh–what percentage of SB’s on SA are “desperate”? Ooops, sorry…rhetorical q:

  131. Beach_Girl says:

    Josh~ sorry, I sent it without thinking… that was kind of very rude and sarcastic. Yes, I know a few dozen SBs and none have fallen in love with their SD

    RSD~ Maybe this SB was never in an arrangement and maybe got taken by all the attention and such? maybe do more screening and see if they understand the true meaning of a arrangement relationship
    Communication, make things clean from the start

  132. Beach_Girl says:

    Josh~ I know more than a few dozen SBs so… none have fallen in love, do you need me to count that out for you?

  133. Beach_Girl says:

    Well… I have had SD and guys tell me they were in love the first time they met me…but I think it was more a tactic to get me in bed? lol

    Richard~ You are a catch!!! 😀

  134. Josh says:

    @Beach Girl and @Kms2014

    How many SBs have you spoken to (interviewed?) about this issue of falling in love with SDs?

  135. Kms2014 says:

    Wow, didn’t realise this happened so much…Did she want to divorce her husband and marry you, Richard?

  136. Richard says:

    Happened to me, too. And she was married with four kids. 🙁

  137. Kms2014 says:


  138. Kms2014 says:

    Could be…I am sorry that happened to you…A proper SB would NEVER even suggest/hint you leave your wife, and marry them– much less pressure you! This is not a commonplace practice, in the SB/SD sphere that I know of…I have heard of this sort of thing in regular extramarital ‘affairs’ that are not SD/SD oriented. Perhaps, you are picking SB that are new to this lifestyle? No idea…

  139. RSD says:

    Kms, I have no idea what you mean by love, but I think when someone is so enamored that they constantly pressure you to leave your wife and marry them because of love it counts. Not to say I lack affection for them, but the rules of the game are pretty clear. Maybe it’s the way I pick people, who knows…

  140. Kms2014 says:

    I meant, I have heard of it happening, but more of a ‘requited’* type thing. Also, this SD I spoke of, he also mentioned how he was starting to feel deeper feelings and how we both were on a path to love(which, I never even said that!…so, he was quite out of touch with my reality). Mr. RSD, are you sure you are reading all the signs correctly? Are these women really all falling in love with you, or maybe, just telling you what they ‘think’ you might want to hear(or, even just being overly appreciative…not saying this to be rude…just a thought…I tell my female friends how much I love them all the time, but not in a romantic way. Sometimes, younger women can have the tendency to over exaggerate emotionally…and confuse love with a great fondness…

  141. Kms2014 says:

    “Beach_Girl, I think people have a harder time separating fantasy from reality and accepting that what they have, nice as it may or may not be, is not going to be exactly what they want.”

    I agree with beachgirl…I do not think love, especially the ‘unrequited’ sort is a commonplace fantasy for most SB….I am well over 25 and have never had this happen to me, personally. I have heard of it happening, but more of a required type thing, and then both parties agreed to either continue on, if they were both single, or part ways, due to other relationships(or, one being married). Have never heard of this ‘all women on SA are seeking some fantasy to fall in love’?? I’m not, anyways….Quite the opposite, actually, as most are looking for a ‘no strings attached’ mutually fun and exiting arrangement, but with meaning, in that there is a respect and mutual liking. If I wanted love, then I would not be looking on SA…However, with that being said, things can happen, and you never know when feelings might come in the way. The first SD I had was a bit full of himself, and frequently brought up how we ‘might both fall in love’ all the time, and how he was ‘worried about that’. It would have been fine, if he meant it in a kind or thoughtful way, but he was being a bit presumptuous and pompous about it, when he mentioned this. As if he was getting off on the idea. He was delusional, in that I never had feelings of love for him– not even close.

  142. SouthernSB says:

    @Flyr Well you could always encourage all of the men in upper management to go with you to the party, that way you all would be “guilty” and nobody would have to say a word. 😉

  143. RSD says:

    Beach_Girl, I think people have a harder time separating fantasy from reality and accepting that what they have, nice as it may or may not be, is not going to be exactly what they want.

    The sugar party is a publicity / marketing stunt for the site, not a practical means to meet an SB given the privacy issues discussed and the fact that unless you live in that city you wouldn’t find a local SB. But I do wish we could have sugar speed-dating, where we get to meet like 50 people for 2 min each. Would be much easier then browsing tons of profiles and wondering whether I’d like each one in person or not (the correlation between online profile and in-person persona is kinda low).

  144. flyr says:

    Let me see if I understand this. According to some of the stats most SD’s are married, others may have girlfirends/boyfriends, corporate boards,fellow faculty members, political ambitions, etc. We’re expecting them to be comfortable that their mask is going to hide their identities from people standing next to them and listening to their voices. It also adds the complexity that if I am working I need to get into my tux without someone asking me where I am going.

  145. Beach_Girl says:

    Hello Sugars!!!

    Happy Easter or whatever you celebrate today 😀

    RSD~ hummm odd, so you think that all SBs will fall in love with you? because they are older? seriously???? lol… I think it’s odd… you aren’t making things clear maybe?
    Do they know what an “arrangement” is?
    sorry, I have never really met a SB that fell “in LOVE” with their SD. Maybe fell a friendly love, but not the lets settle down love.
    You build a bond being in an arrangement, it’s normal to have feelings but love? nope… you are with younger SBs maybe that’s why, but seriously, not the norm and I know quite a few SB personally and none have fallen in love!

    Drama~ some people crave drama, they search it out and feed off of it. I know a few people like that and I just get away. Life is complicated enough without some shit disturber tried to mess everything up for fun. No thanks, I have better things to do with my time. It’s not easy, sometimes you get sucked into the “crazy” , but you manage to see beyond it.
    We are emotional people, so it’s easy to get riled up. Take a step back, take a deep breath and move on!

    The party, seriously “there will be media present at the event” Who would want to go to that? Most SD want discretion and you bring media in?
    Isn’t there enough media attention to SA already and bringing down the quality of people on the site?
    It’s odd to me, these parties cannot be that great. The people I know that have been to some, all say the same, they would never go back… so why push, to make more money? to make the site known to people that just don’t get how arrangements work?
    I wouldn’t go, not my type of party and with media, I’m not a well known person and I want to keep it that way!!!

    • Brook Urick says:

      Hi Beach_Girl,

      Thanks for your response. You bring up a good point about media being present. However, we know our users value discretion and that is why this is a masquerade event. Please review the media section of this blog, and you’ll see that there will be no unwanted photos or risk of exposure.

      This is going to be an amazing event and a chance for our users to mingle in real life.

      Hope to see you there!

  146. RSD says:

    I’ve been told by some women who know of my predicament that if I want girls not to fall in love with me, I have to be super nice to them. The thing is, I typically am very nice to people, including to SBs. But perhaps I have a certain aloofness or lack of desperation that feeds into this in some strange way, or maybe it’s too obvious that I can easily find someone else, so hanging on to me turns into some weird challenge; I’m not sure. I wish I could figure it out though.

    On a simple level, I’ve concluded that most women (perhaps in particular women looking for SDs) have an innate desire for a man who will take care of them. And I think as soon as they sense some emotional comfort and financial security, they project that fantasy onto me and feel like this is the real thing and want it to last forever. And I think by the mid to late twenties, most women are looking at settling down and somehow I look like a promising prospect (perhaps in comparison to the losers they dated before me), yet they overlook the simple and oft-stated fact that I’m married and would never want to get married again or have more kids.

    This issue is quite real though and it is truly hampering my desire to meet new SBs–I just don’t want to deal with the drama and emotional burden of having someone so attached to me :/

  147. Zack says:

    Where’s OP when you need him?

    www youtube.com/watch?v=DUkce1WOc1A

  148. Josh says:


    RSD indicated receiving proclamation of love from “every single” of his 25+ SBs “quite early” in their arrangement with him, and ss1959 indicated that his L-bomb dropping SB “isn’t a kid, nor have we been together all that long.”

    Is this a frequently occuring challenge with your arrangements?

  149. Zack says:

    @RSD I’ve got a few ideas, but personally, some emotional subtext to a relationship is something I Seek…and a “right” one. But, I’d “love” to see you discuss this with SS1959 😛

    Have you given thought to what it is in you that keeps this repeating? Can you identify more specifically what problems are to be avoided? If it’s kids, try a vasectomy; if it’s publicity, keep your sugar world separate in various ways; if it’s making vulnerable women cry, well—that gets complicated.

  150. RSD says:

    Hi Josh,

    I missed the previous discussion on the L-bomb. It’s been the bane of my sugar existence. All I know is that every single SB 25 or over has brought up love and being together forever (and they bring it up quite early, after a few meets at the latest). I assumed that I’m either too old for the 18-24 year olds to fall in love with me, or perhaps that they’re just not looking for happily-ever-after yet. But I am just not looking for a repeat marriage and more babies, so it really makes the relationship more emotionally-burdened and creates the set-up for disappointment.

  151. Josh says:


    Hmmm, we were discussing the L-bomb in the previous blog article. Is that a frequent occurrence among SBs in certain age group?

  152. Eloquence says:

    Lmao… Running/dancing..eh..its all the same..

    YouTube: “Days Go By” Dirty Vegas by Amer Taj

  153. flyr says:

    “Is he running again?” only from Hillary’s wrath

  154. Josh says:


    There is no real excitement about the event on the blog. How many SBs and SDs have actually signed up?

    • Brook Urick says:

      Hi Josh,

      There are over 200 SBs and SDs who have purchased tickets and VIP tables already.
      The event is filling up quickly, so I would recommend getting a ticket while Early Bird discounts are still available.

      Thanks for your interest and I hope to see you there!

  155. RSD says:

    “You must be 21 years old to attend.”

    That’s annoying. What about the 18-20 year old SBs? Considering that I’m scared of SBs in the mid twenties and older (they always seem to fall in love with me and want to get married after a week), it would leave me with only the 21-24 year old category. Can’t we have an alcohol-free room for the too-young-to-drink SBs?

    • Brook Urick says:

      Hi RSD,

      Thanks for your response and presence on the blog.
      In response to this statement, I’m sorry you feel that way about the girls over 21.
      I assure you, not all girls in their twenties are going to want to get married.

      Unfortunately, there is no way to insure no underage drinking at this event. Because we do not want to find ourselves in a predicament, it’s important to keep the age limit at 21.

      Thanks and I hope to see you there!

  156. Zack says:

    Is he running again?

  157. flyr says:

    I wonder if Anthony Weiner will attend.

  158. Zack says:

    Well, this is just the blog. Not a real concern to SA, of a matter of course.

    www youtube.com/watch?v=VppuD1St8Ec

  159. Elaine says:

    Big hit this topic! *LOL*

  160. Josh says:

    Good luck with the event. I hope that it helps expand SA’s membership. 😉

  161. Zack says:

    Thanks for the schematics 🙂 One of these days, you’re hopefully not going to see me at one of these. Is it ok to ask a wag on attendance?