Let’s be honest, ever since 50 Shades of Grey exposed kink to the mainstream, women are opening up to ideas outside vanilla. With that being said, bringing up your kinks to a partner has become a lot less taxing over the years. Here is what to keep in mind when introducing your partner to something outside the sexual norm.

I know, I know, but communication is key. But she’s not a mindreader, and it’s all about how you present the situation. Don’t make it a yes or no thing, because when someone feels backed into a corner they’re more likely to jump straight to no, and nobody wins. Talk with leisure in person and ease her into the idea, and express what you want to share with her.

Never act ashamed about what you’re presenting. It can be a natural reaction, especially if you are feeling vulnerable. It can be intimidating when there’s a fear of judgement involved. But don’t let social stigma hesitate you from talking to her about what you like, you could be pleasantly surprised about her reaction, or her own interests.

Slow Down
Start slow when introducing her to your kink in the bedroom. Heck, easing bits into light choking, spanking, dirty talk etc can be a great conversation opener and a way to gage her interest as well. Don’t just go full chains, whips, whatever it may be, unless you’re trying to scare her from the idea in a hurry.

Also, if she is bringing up her wild side, be as open minded as you want her to be. Being married is often portrayed as the death of sex, so if you’re married but looking this can be a godsend to something more exciting.

What has and hasn’t worked for you?